A (0:02)

Yeah. Who's writing the story anyways? You know, I always say the greatest story you will ever know is the life that you are creating yourself. But we have to be careful. And what pen that we're using, what pencil have we placed onto life? You know, your fear may have become the storyteller. You know, making up narratives, making up excuses. You know, you're forming assumptions out of protection. You ever do that? Like, you just assume the worst. You just assume people have ill intentions towards you. You just assume people are talking negatively about you. You assume that bad look in public is a microaggression, really, the person just off in their own head. Which pen are you holding? In life right now, is it joy or fear? Is it curiosity? Or is it a pen that is full of deep shame? It's important to know. That's why we got to do an audit on ourselves. The greatest story you will ever know is the one that you are writing yourself, my friend. This life is your book, right? You are the director, the editor, the writer, all of that, but has your instincts and your intuition and your wisdom taking a back seat to your fear. Because again, fear tells you, ah, I'm not deserving of love or everyone is against me. Fear tells you not to trust the love in your life and to retreat. Fear tells you to be nonchalant. You ever do that? Like you're really interested in somebody, you really like them, and you're just acting like you don't, like, super nonchalant to the point you push them away because you're fearful. What if I do love? What if I show my interest and it doesn't come back to me? Oh, my. I'll be so embarrassed. Oh, my God, the rejection. I can't. Which pen are you holding? Fear tells you to not expose how you truly feel. And fear holds you back, right? A lot of us are holding ourselves back. But what do I always say? When we lead with love, we leave with love. Simple. When we lead with love, we leave with love. Can you love with your chest wide open? Good question. Can you give without instant reciprocation, can you love yourself even if the world has turned the other way and they're not giving you any attention? This is true peace. You understand? And you know, we love peace over here. In hindsight, everything gonna be all right. Peace isn't hiding away on a mountain, away from the disturbances of the world. Peace isn't coddling yourself in your own bubble. Peace is actually remaining grounded in the world, in the polarities of life, in love, in breakups, in the transitions and crossroads we will navigate through. A lot of us, you know, yeah, we feel peaceful in our little bubbles. But as soon as we step into life, oh, man, the triggers, you know, they start to rise up. But that's okay. We're on a journey, and as long as we are aware, that means we can navigate through them and we can evolve and expand and pick up a new pen. But be mindful. Which pen are you using in life right now? Fear writes stories frantically. It's anxious, it's scattered, it's full of conspiracies. I actually think it's better to be just a little naive. Not too naive, but just a little naive. In life, I always say I'm a little naive now, sometimes it does bite me in the butt, but it keeps me open, keeps me open, loving life. And because of that, life loves me and beautiful things happen. So I prefer it. I think it's better to just be a little, just, I'm just saying, a tiny bit, a micro bit naive versus just being consumed with fear, thinking everyone is distrustful, thinking everything is out to get you. That's a heavy feeling to carry. That's why we have boundaries, right? To keep us safe. That's why they're there. I'd rather be a little naive, but have good boundaries. Understand? Boundaries built with love, not fear. Boundaries built with love for self, love for life. So if someone does have ill intentions, we are protected. And if someone has great intentions, we do not push them out of our. A lot of us be pushing good people out of our life. Sometimes it's true because we are writing our story with fear. The best stories, how do they end? They end off with a good ending, a good note. But after some turbulence, right? Every good story has some turbulence and it brings it to a happy ending. But fear has no happy ending. It only has cliffhangers. Like a Netflix show, right? I always say, like back in the day, like shows were positive. There was always like a conclusion at the end, a message, and the music comes on. Now shows, they just keep you on your toes with drama, you understand? Because they're written with a pen of fear, right? Keep us anxious, keep us consumed, waiting for that next emotional dopamine hit. But when love is writing the story, it's like you're in a beautiful ROM con. I don't know why, but growing up, I was a nerd. I used to just love, like the ROM cons with like, Jennifer Aniston and like Jennifer Lopez. I think because, like, my mom watched them. So you Know, like single mother, you know, I just watching whatever's on the TV and I just kind of ended up growing up, like liking those cheesy love movies. Oh, no, they fire. But you know, that's like what love is like. You know, when you're writing your story with love, it's like a beautiful rom com. It's sensual, it's secure, it's magical. But when fear is writing the story. When fear is writing the story, it's giving like, I don't know, like the ultimatum or any of those other drama dating shows. That's because your nervous system is waiting for reinsurance. You see, fear is impatient. It wants answers before reality has even spoken. It fills in the silence with the loudest possibilities. Those crazy narratives you come up with, and none of them are loving. Fear isn't curious as well, right? Fear doesn't pause to ask, like, are these my wounds talking? You know, do I, Do I have evidence of this? I always tell people. Often I'm like, I don't. If someone gives me a weird look in public or I don't know. I do not assume anything because I always bring it back to this one moment moment in life. And I'll say it real fast because I said it so many times, but I was in a thrift shop and this old, old lady was just staring at me. And I thought she was staring at me because she thought I was stealing. I thought it was like a racist encounter. And it was like triggering me at the time. She kept staring at me. I'm like, why is she staring at me? Then I lost sight of her. And out of nowhere, she comes behind me, taps me on the shoulder and she's like, sir, I just want to let you know you're like one of the most beautiful men I've ever seen in my life. And I was like, oh my God, this whole time I thought this woman was judging me, thinking I'm going to steal, but she was admiring me. And from that moment, I'm like, I'm going to stop assuming. I'm going to put down this pen of fear that I picked up from previous unfortunate encounters, like racist encounters and stuff. But I'm going to put that pen down. I'll pick up a new pen. Because you know what? I want to live my life open. I don't want to assume the worst. You see, fear sees a blank page and panics. So it writes the worst plot it can think of just to feel in control. Fear writes from old chapters, not the current moment. Fear doesn't Write the story you're living. It writes the story you are still trying to survive. Or you survive the old heartbreak, the old disappointments, the old patterns. Fear is like a historian, not a prophet, trying to tie you to those old timelines. You see the first draft of your feelings. Sometimes it's usually fear, isn't it? Especially when it comes into our dynamics with people. Oh, why then? They seem to be acting a little bit weird. Maybe I did something. Maybe they don't like me anymore. Maybe. No, no, no, no, no. Relax. You understand. You are loved and you are deserving of love. Because fear is quick. It writes the first draft, it says something is wrong. But the second draft, the grounded one, that's where your truth lives. Fear guesses and assumes, oh, they don't love me anymore. Love listens and observes and understands. Love asks. Fear rushes to fill the silence. Love lets the silence breathe. Fear dramatizes. Fear jumps to conclusions. Love waits for clarity. Which pen are you writing with? Life right now? Where does your mind go? What is the first draft? Is it going to the negative? If so, be mindful of that. Be the type of individual that can live their life fully. You can give love without worrying if you're going to receive love. Because you're like, you know what? I have the capacity to love and that's all that matters. And you have the capacity and the self respect to remove yourself from any situation or dynamic that drains you if at some point there's never no reciprocation or whatever. You know what I'm saying? But which pen are you writing from? You know, fear traces old wounds. But love pays attention to what's real right now. That's what I love about it. Fear tries to protect us from shrinking, but then we shrink ourselves, right? Because we harden our hearts. But then love protects by expanding the way you talk to yourself. Is it expansion or is it shrinking yourself? Fear hides. Are you hiding yourself? Are you hiding your dreams? Are you hiding your potential? Are you hiding how you feel? Are you hiding what is on your heart? Love reveals. Can you love with your chest wide open for life? The more you love life, the more life is going to love you and pour into you. Fear constantly scans for danger. Love notices what. What is beautiful when you step outside. When you step outside, when you're in conversation, what do you notice? Do you notice the beautiful things in life or are you focused on the things you don't like? When you look at yourself in the mirror, what do you see? Do you tunnel vision on your insecurities or do you love yourself? This will tell you what pen you have picked up. And it's okay. You just got to recognize, oh, my God, I'm writing with fear in life right now. Let me put this together down and pick up that pen of love again. Love notices what is beautiful, but fear demands reassurance. Love gives presence, but fear builds walls. Love builds understanding. And again, fear creates those cliffhangers you understand. Keep just taking the breath right out of you. Love writes with closure. Love brings you back to yourself. Fear divides yourself. And fear tries to control the narrative. But love lets the truth unfold. And when we're writing from that frequency of fear, we're always bracing for impact, like something bad's gonna happen. But love keeps you open to possibility. This is why I say it's better to just be a tiny, tiny bit naive. So you're open to possibility, right? If you go through like, I don't know, like a rough breakup and like you just completely harden your heart for years and years and years and you just think everyone's out to get you, you will actually push away the most beautiful people in your life that the universe that God the Most High is trying to send to you. Because you're constantly bracing for impact. But you're going to have to give your nervous system a new experience, meaning. You're going to have to step into love and open yourself up to possibilities. Because the real question is, what kind of storyteller do you want to be? Because you are a storyteller. You are creating a life for yourself. The greatest story you will ever know is the one that you are writing yourself right now, my friend. Everything will end one day. So what is going to be the ending to your story? And right now, what page are you on? What pen are you writing with curiosity and joy? Or is it fear and constant guilt? Ask yourself. It's so easy to slip into fear. It's so easy to think that, like, all opportunities and doors are closed, especially when the doors have been slammed on us so many times, right? But if you can still lift your spirits up, have hope, have possibility, lead with love. So you leave with love. Even. Even when the world seems to be trying to shut you down, my friend, you develop the most beautiful, resilient muscles in your spirit and in your heart. You expand, you open yourself up and you realize all is possible. And you love life and life just loves you back. And you don't know in hindsight, everything gonna be more than alright. Pick up that pen again. Write with love.