← In Totality with Megan Ashley
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- [00:44]
Megan Ashley
What's up fam? Listen, if you've been blessed by In Totality the podcast, then I want to personally invite you to go deeper by joining our Patreon community called the Village every Tuesday morning. The Village access to the full episode of the podcast two days before it drops publicly on YouTube. So while everyone else is waiting, you're already soaking it in. But that's just the beginning. As a Village member, you get exclusive access to the In Totality docu series. It's a behind the scenes look at how I walk on my faith in real life. No filters, no fluff, just real moments of me trusting the Lord, processing life and growing in truth. We also do live book clubs, club Zoom calls where we read and grow together in the Word. I'm not just talking at you worth walking through it together, asking questions, wrestling through scriptures, learning to follow Christ more fully. You know, like that Romans 12. You'll also get bonus content, extra conversations with podcast guests that go even deeper, plus moments that didn't make it to the episode but were just too good not to share. And one more thing. When you join the Village, you get first access to merch before it drops public. So if you love the message and you want to rep the movement, you'll.
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Megan Ashley
But more than the content, the Village is about community. It's a safe place for believers to connect and grow and be reminded that you're not doing this walk alone. You're a part of something real. We're building something special and we would love for you to be a part. So hit pause, go to www.patreon.com meganashley and join today and I'll meet you there.
- [02:34]
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This week my kids have started school. I was praying and seeking the Lord, asking him for strategy and wisdom on how I need to approach this school year in order to disciple our children. Like, we also have to put a demand on the intimacy and the relationship that we have with the Lord. I think it's really important that we posture our hearts in a way that we are loving and delighting in the Lord and in our relationship with him first so that we can give that to our children. What's up, you guys? Welcome back to another episode of In Totality. Now listen. Okay, this is going to be interesting because number one, it's five o' clock in the morning. Six o' clock in the morning. It's super early. My kids are literally getting ready to wake up here in about 30 minutes or so. One of them, Caleb, is already up right now. So if you hear footsteps, if you hear, you know, running water, if you hear some bickering with them, I don't know. I don't know what's going to happen in the next 30 minutes. I'm going to pray to get through this episode timely. I don't know what's going to happen. So if you hear stuff, this is going to be a little different. It's just Jay and I, we're trying to. You hear that? I'm, like, talking into the mic, trying to be as quiet as possible, but this is going to be interesting. But this topic that I'm getting ready to approach is not something that I feel like we can fit in one episode. This is such a big, big conversation. And you guys know how I am. I'm, I'm, I, I want to be open and honest and transparent and bring you in on this journey and this walk that I'm taking with, with Christ and a huge part of my life outside of God. The most important things in my life are my children. I, I want to preface this by saying I am not an expert. I am not a parenting expert. Okay. I have failed in so many ways as a parent. I've only been a parent for 15 years. It's. And it's still a years. But I've made a lot of mistakes and there are a lot of things that I've gone that I've done wrong. And I feel like there are some ways in which God has graced me to do things in the way that is pleasing to him. And my, my prayer, my goal is always to continue, that is to be obedient to the Lord and continue to do things that pleases him in how I raise my children. And so I just want to preface this by saying, number one, it's early, okay? So bear with me. Number two, my kids are getting ready to get up for school, so if you hear stuff, bear with us. And number three, I am not a parenting expert, okay? I am bringing you in on my process. And the way the Lord is developing me and training me and gracing me and helping me be a good steward over the children that he has given me, over the lives that he has given me to steward. Okay? So I just want to preface it by saying all those things. This week, it's Friday, and this week, my kids have started school. And so for a lot of you, by the time this episode comes out, a lot of you maybe who are parents, your children have started school. It's weird because in Georgia, it's like. Like, Georgia kids are the first kids to go to school in the country. It feels like it's like they start school before everyone. August 1st is crazy to me. Like, the first week of August, they're starting school. I don't know about you guys. I'm a. I'm a millennium. Millennial. Millennium. I'm a. I told you I was early. I'm a millennial, and I'm from the Midwest. I'm from Columbus, Ohio, and we. I feel like when I was in school and Jay, I don't know about you. You're. You're from Chicago, but you lived here most. Yeah, I. We started school in September. Like, literally, like, the last week of August, going into September, I feel like I don't know where things have changed. I. I don't. Yeah. Like, the last week of August is when we started school, so I don't know when things changed. I don't know if that was a Midwest thing, because Jay is from Midwest, too. He's from Chicago. It's like, I don't know if that's a Midwest thing. In the south, we all do a different. I don't know. But this August 1st. Give me a minute. Okay. So it's still hot outside. It's like, I don't want kids to go to school until the fall, until the leaves start to change. Literally. It's hot. We're all. It's the time change hasn't even. Like, the time hasn't even. Is weird. Anyway, y' all let me know in the comments. Is this, like, normal? Like, did y' all start school in August or did y' all start school in September? I don't know. It's weird. But anyway, said all that to say my kids have started school. This week. And, and it's a big school. It's a big year for us. Okay? My oldest son is starting his first year of high school, so he's a freshman. And that's a big deal because it's like, my goodness, I only have four more years right before he becomes an adult. And he is going to have to start making, you know, some harder decisions on his own. Not completely independent of, of me and his father, but he's going to have to make some, some decisions on his own. Where to go to school, what to major in, should he stay close to home. Like, releasing him out into the world. I can't even talk about it. Literally, my stomach just started hurting because it's like, that's my baby. Right? And then Caleb is, is in seventh grade, and he is continuing to progress and, and advance, and we're so proud of him. And then Jonah is his last year of elementary. And so, and this is another thing because I was talking to Jackie about this last night, and it's like, when does middle school start for us? Where I'm from, middle school started in fifth grade. It was fifth and sixth. That was middle school. And then junior high was seventh and eighth, and then high school was ninth. So I don't know, people do it other places. Middle school here for my kids is sixth grade to eighth grade, and then high school is ninth. And on elementary is K through 5. I, you know, if we could all just be united and get on the same page as a country. It's like, Lord, you see the division all the way down to the school calendar. It's just in, in the school system anyway, that's a whole another topic for another day. But, but Jonah is, this is his last year of elementary. He's in fifth grade, and he will be going to middle school next year. And so there's just a lot of changes. And so as I was praying for them on Mondays, they started school on Monday. And thank God it was a Monday because the y' all starting school on Friday, that's ridiculous. It's ridiculous. Okay, I, I, I'm sure you can hear the alarm maybe right now. Starting school on a, on a, on Thursday. Friday, it's ridiculous. Wednesday I can have grace for that. Thursday, Friday, y' all, please just start them on Monday. Like, two more extra days is not going to hurt. Okay? Anyway, so they started school on Monday and I was praying for them and seeking the Lord and asking him for strategy and wisdom on how I need to approach this school year. You know, give me vision for this school year, give me vision for my children to steward them, how to steward Eli as he's starting as a freshman in high school for Jonah, his last year for Caleb. Like, I'm just asking the Lord for strategy. And I feel like the Lord led me to this scripture that I have. I've read it before, and we've all read it, because this is where Moses gives the Is Israelites the greatest command, right? The greatest commandment. And this is in Deuteronomy 6. And so I'm going to start reading it, and it's. I'm going to start in the beginning of Deuteronomy 6, and then I'm going to go into verse 4, all the way to verse 8. So I'm going to start off with verse 1, okay? It says, this is the command, the statues and the ordinances. The. The Lord your God has commanded me to teach you so that you may follow them in the land you are about to enter and possess. Do this so that you may fear the Lord your God all days of your life. By keeping all his statues and commands, I'm giving you your son and your grandson, and so that you may have a long life. Listen, Israel, and be careful to follow them so that you may prosper and multiply greatly. Because the Lord, the God of your fathers, have promised you a land flowing of milk and honey. Then it goes on in verse four. Listen, Israel, the Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength. These words that I'm giving you today are to be in your heart. Repeat them to your children. Talk about them when you sit in your house and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Bind them as a sign on your hand and let them be a symbol on your forehead. Write them on the doorposts of your house and on the. On your city gates. And so I remember reading this because again, this is where Moses gives the greatest command, right to love your God with all your heart, with all your soul and with all your strength. But then what was interesting to me is it goes on to say, it says, repeat them to your children. And then it says, talk about them when you sit in your house and when you walk along the road, when you lie down, when you get up. And so when it says, when you. When you. When you lie down and when you get up. When I started studying this, it's called a mirism, I think I said this right? And basically, what that Is. Is when it says when you lie down and when you, when you get up, it's saying in totality. And so when I was studying this and I was looking at the. Some commentary and it was talking about how this is basically indicating in totality, obviously you guys know, right? That obviously struck a chord with me and it captured my attention because in totality is. Is. Is how I feel like the Lord commissioned me in, in this, In. In this ministry and with this podcast. And so as I was praying and I felt like the Lord led me to this, I felt like the Lord was putting an urgency on me to disciple my children and to put an emphasis on discipleship. And again, I was coming to the Lord and I was feeling anxious about a lot of the things, right? As parents, you wanna do the best that you can, but, you know, as a parent, you failed in ways, right? And you wish you can go back, like where I am now as a 35 year, you know, raising kids, I'm a lot more mature, I'm a lot more grounded, I'm a lot more knowledgeable than I was when I started having children at 20. I had Eli at 20. And when I think back on, on who I was at 20 and my maturity at 20, it's like there's. I just can't fathom the fact that the Lord allowed me to have children. But he did. And in his sovereignty and in his goodness, right, he works all things out. And so. But when I look back, I'm 35 now. I'm just like, oh, oh, my goodness. Like, I wish I could go back and fix some of the ways that I. That. That I. That I did when they were younger. And so when I was praying for them, I felt a little anxiousness, like, okay, God, you know, Eli's in high school, he's gonna graduate. Before I know it, I'm gonna blink, and he's gonna be graduating from high school. And I'm like, did I do enough? You know, Did I do enough? Did I pray enough? Did I. Did I train him right? Did I give him enough things? Did I love him enough? Was I affectionate enough? Did I talk to him enough? Did I? And. And so as I was praying for the Lord, a lot of those anxieties was coming up. And as the Lord gave me this scripture, I really do feel like the Lord was placing my anxieties right with urgency. Because the Lord says that cast, like, cast all your cares, Cast all your anxieties on the Lord, for He cares for. For. So as I was casting Those anxiety, I feel like the Lord is like, listen, at the end of the day, I love you and I love those boys. And I love those boys more than you do. Right? They're mine. I have entrusted you with them, but they belong to me. And so what I want you to do is be obedient and go to, like in this scripture. I want you to do what, what I commanded for my people to do, which is to repeat the greatest commandment to your children. Teach them the ways of the Lord. Make it a part of their lives in totality. Don't make it separate. And so my, My encouragement today is to. For all the parents, because there's so many parents that are starting their kids with school this year. I just want to encourage you that. But let's go into this school year making discipleship a priority. As much as we are their education, as much as we are their sports and their, their talents and all the things that I'm sure your kids are gifted to do, let's also make sure as believers, we are prioritizing, discipling our children. Right? For this is what the Lord has commanded us to do. And so I, I think the biggest part of this in the beginning, where it says, love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your strength. These words are to be in your heart. Right? And so I think it's really important that in order to disciple our children, like, we also have to put a demand on the intimacy and the relationship that we have with the Lord. The Bible says in John 14:15, that if you love me, you'll follow my command. Right? Commands. And so we, if we love the Lord, then we also have to be obedient the Lord, okay? It's. It's our love for the Lord that should drive our obedience, not coming from a place of fear. And I think that we have to be mindful of this because we can, we can display this and then pass that down to our children. If we are not coming from a place of delight and we're coming from a place of. If you don't, God's going to do that. Like, if it's coming from a place of fear, then we raise our children up like that and they don't delight in the Lord and they don't know that the Lord loves them and cares for them and wants them to delight in, in him and be satisfied in him and not just coming from a place of fear. So I think it's really important that we, we. We posture our hearts in a way that we are loving and delighting in the Lord and in our relationship with him first so that we can give that to our children, so that we can exemplify that for our children and model that for our children. Right? Discipleship is important because it's. It's not just in the ways that you, you know, you say things or you instruct, but it's also in the way that you live. I tell you guys all the time, my mom, she was so great at being an example. Like, I learned so much from my mom. Not so much by the things she just sat down and taught me, but how she lived her life. I saw her pray, I saw her walk around the house and, And, And. And prayer and, and communicating with go. I. You guys know how many times I have woken up and my mom has had her hands on my head, laying hands on me? I told you about one time I had pink eye. My mom then put olive oil on my eye, woke up. I said, now I'm blind. First I had a red eye, Now I got blurry vision. But it only lasted for a little bit because when I woke up, when I. When I woke up, I didn't have pink eye anymore, right? And so, like, my mom trusted in the Lord. I saw the times that she struggled and remained faithful. I saw the times that she was hurt and she forgave, forgave. I saw the times that she was betrayed and she still loved people like, she exemplified. I saw her delight in the things of the Lord. I saw her enjoy reading her Word. I. She. She didn't listen to all types of music, right? She didn't watch all types of shows. When certain conversations we would be at, like, kickbacks at like, my godmother's house or whoever, friends, whatever. And if there were certain conversations, my mom would either direct that conversation in a way that glorified the Lord, or she would walk away from certain conversations. I just saw her live it out for real. And that's part of discipleship, is that it's not just in, hey, we're going to church on Sunday, and that's it. But it's living it out in totality. This is what the Bible says. When you. When you. When you sit in the house and when you walk on the road, right? So no matter the location, you are big. You are a discipler to your children. You're doing it all the time. It's not just on Sunday mornings that we listen to worship music, but it's every day. It's music that glorifies the Lord. Like, I listen to. To godly music because I love the Lord. I delight in him. I love to sing his praises, right? And so I think it's important. Luke, Luke 6:40 says, a disciple is not above his teacher, but everyone who is fully trained will be like his teacher. So how you live your life, your kids will. Will imitate that. Do they hear you have godly conversations? Do they hear you delighting in the Lord? Can they tell that your affections are for him? That you. That you enjoy your relationship with the Lord? Not that you're just obligated to him, but you. But you love him, that the gospel has. Has pierced your heart and you. And you're just. Your affections are for. So the kids need to see that. Kids need to see that modeled not just in words, but in actions. Okay? Discipleship, again, it is a daily thing. It is a lifestyle. This isn't just, we're gonna go to church on Sundays, we're gonna go on Easter. We're gonna go on Mother's Day, right? But. But we're. We're making an emphasis to keep them around godly community, right? We're a part of a local church. We have godly community. And, and like, you, your kids, like. For me, I think it's really important that my kids see that I'm a disciple. I'm a disciple, right? That I have discipleship, that I'm learning one thing, that one thing that was so, so powerful to me. I remember growing up, and this is a really big thing, especially for church kids.
- [21:55]
Megan Ashley
What's up, you guys? This ad is brought to you by Better Health. Listen, y', all, let's be honest for a second. You ever try to get clarity on your mental health and just end up overwhelmed by all the online advice? From clothe punches to gratitude journals to screen detox. Listen, it's a lot. I've been there, too. The information overload can be so real, especially when you're just trying to feel better, grow, and find peace. For me, real peace starts in the presence of the Lord, through prayer and staying in my word. But I've also learned that sometimes you need help sorting through your thoughts too. Therapy can be a powerful tool in that journey. That's why I love that there are platforms like BetterHelp. Whether it's learning how to set boundaries, manage your emotions, or just talk through your day, therapy can equip you with tools to assist in achieving your goals. BetterHelp is the world's largest online platform with over 30, 000 therapists and has helped over 5 million people worldwide. The app is super user friendly with a 4.9 out of 5 star rating based off of over 1.7 million reviews. It's flexible too. You can find a therapist who gets you and start talking without long wait times or a commute. And if the first therapist isn't a fit, you can switch at any time. As the largest online therapy provider in the world, Better Help can provide access to mental health professionals with a diverse variety of expertise. Listen, Talk it out with Better help. Our listeners get 10% off their first month at betterhelp.com totality. Get that's betterhelp H-E-L-P.com totality all right, guys, back to the conversation.
- [23:36]
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And for parents who are in ministry, just for. This is really, just for anybody, but this was really powerful to me as a church kid and as a had, as a, as a kid who had a parent who was in leadership at our church is that. I remember on multiple occasions, my mom repenting to me. I remember her saying, mommy was wrong for that. I shouldn't have reacted in that way. And it was so powerful to me. Like, looking back now as an adult, I'm like, wow, that was so powerful. That's, that's, that's making it a part of your daily life is being humble enough that when you get it wrong, you go to your children and you say, hey, listen, I need to repent. I shouldn't have said it this way. I shouldn't have done it that way. God convicted me. God in his kindness and his mercy led me to the right way. Right? And Mommy needs to, Mommy needs to tell you that I'm sorry and that. And I need you to forgive me. Right? Showing that humility, even to your children, your children aren't beneath you repenting to. That's, that's part of discipleship. Even you being humble enough to, to repent to them is discipleship. Them seeing you humble yourself with other people, that's part of discipleship. How you treat people when you're at the Chick Fil A line or when you're at the grocery store, that's discipleship. I'm not the best in traffic, you know what I'm saying? I could do better. Somebody, you know, and I live in Atlanta, y', all, they just. People be driving and doing the craziest stuff. The craziest stuff. It could be a clear day at noon, and Atlanta drivers are going to find a way to create a bad day. They're going to find a way how I have seen more cars faced in the opposite direction on a freeway than I have ever seen in my life, okay? It's, it's crazy. And I've been driving for, for, for a little while now, okay? And so I could be better in my discipleship when it comes to patience and driving. But even, but it's like, it's in the everyday living, okay, so when, so when verse seven talks about when you, when you sit and when you lie down, it's saying the totality of your lives, how you live your lives in totality is a form of discipleship. Not just how we show up on Sunday, but how are you showing up on Monday, how are you showing up Wednesday when you're in the middle of the week and the week is getting harder, how are you showing up on Friday? How are you showing, like, how are you showing up every single day as a, as a godly woman or a godly man, as a godly parent, how are you showing up? The Bible is very explicit in Matthew 28:19 to make disciples. And, and I've grown up in church, and in a lot of ways I've seen a lot of church kids, I've seen a lot of pastors kids, ministers kids. And there were some ways where kids were the last on the parents list when it came to discipleship. They discipled everyone else, right? But they didn't disciple their children. And so discipleship, yes, go make disciples. But start in your home. There's your mission field right there. You're ready for God to launch your ministry. It starts right there in the house. Disciple your children. I was, I was thinking about this and I was praying about it because I'm just like, lord, there are so many people that watch this podcast who are coming back to the faith or, or, or, or coming to the faith for the first time. And a lot of them are, and a lot of them may have children, right? And what I love about the In Totality fam is that it's so broad, right? We have listeners that are in that are teenagers all the way up to 60 years old. I've gotten women who are in their 60s that listen to this podcast. And that's a, that's an amazing, that's a blessing. And so these people right here in the middle, these 30 year olds and, and, and 40 year olds who have children, right? Some of them are returning to the faith after deconstructing in ways, and a lot of them are coming to the faith for the first. I know that it can feel anxious, like it can feel there can be anxiety about how you disciple your children, right? Especially when you're like, I'm still learning and growing and I'm still trying to be discipled by the Lord, and I'm still trying to get mentorship and discipleship from. From godly, wise people. Like, this is over. This. This is overwhelming even for me. I get that. But we have to trust in a sovereign God, right? You have to trust that you're gonna make mistakes, right? I know that there's a. Proverbs, Proverbs 22. Whereas this train of a child in the way they should go, and when they get older, they won't depart from it. And I know that that may sound like a promise to you, but proverbs are just. I was listening to John Piper talk about this, but he was like, those are. Those are like general ways that life should go, not necessary guarantees. But understand this. There. There's a scripture in Hosea, Hosea 11. Where, where go about his children, the Israelites, right? He's talking about Israel and he's talking about how he knows that they are going to think about it. Israelites were always disobedient, and God is a perfect father. So clearly we see that you can be a perfect parent. And there's still no guarantee that your kids are going to be perfect. God's perfect. And the Israelites were constantly disobedient. So I just want to take off the. Just release yourself of that burden. Your kids are not going to be perfect. You're not perfect. Your kids aren't going to be perfect. Don't put the totality of their salvation as a burden to you. That is the. The weight of their eternity is on the Lord. You just have to be faithful over repeating God's commands to them, putting them in an environment where. Where God is not. Not where God is not uncommon. If you delight in the Lord, right? Then he, the Lord, like it will be common in your household. So I just want to. I just want to. I don't want this to come across. Please hear me. Hear my heart. I don't want this to come across as like, you need to do this. You need to do this. You need to do this. No delight in the Lord and let that overflow into your love for your children. And let them see you love the Lord and let that be discipleship in your home. Ephesians 6:4 fathers, don't stir up anger in your children, but bring them up in the training and instructions of the Lord. So we see that this is a constant Thing to train them up in the things of the Lord. Train them up in the things of the Lord. I often time when I have conversations with Eli and Jonah, and I'm talking to them about things, I often would ask them, like, you know, what do you think the Lord would think about that? I bring. I invite the Lord into our conversations, even when it's about common things. I don't separate God from anything, but I invite him in on everything when it comes to. When it comes to our lives. Right. One thing that. That I've learned at being a parent is that your children will always imitate your passion. Whatever you're passionate about, it comes out, and then your kids will imitate that. So watch your kids. Like, take. Take time and just observe your kids. I've watched. Okay, I'm gonna give you an example of what happened to me, and I'm gonna tell you what happened to me as a kid, and I'm gonna tell you how I see that with my. With my kids. I'll never forget growing up my mom. There's a. There's a disorder. We know now. We didn't know when I was younger, but there's a disorder called. Jay, you're gonna have to look this up and see if I'm saying it the right way. It's called misophonia, and it's like. I think it's mesophonia, but it's like, a disorder where you don't like, listening, like, tiny noises bother you. Mysophonia, it's called misophonia, and it's like, tiny noises bother you. So, like, you. If you're ever irritated with, like. Like, listening to someone chew, like, if mukbangs drive you crazy, like, I cannot stand mukbangs. That listening to somebody chew, especially when it sounds juicy. Oh, my God, it makes my skin crawl. Like, or smacking on gum. Or when people whistle. When people whistle, y'. All. When people whistle, I should not be as upset as I get. And I literally, Because I love the Lord and I want to honor him in all my ways, I have to actively check my heart. It's like, first of all, they're happy. They're having. They're having a good day. Why are you so irritated with somebody whistling? But the sound of it, it's so intrusive to me. It's like, save that for your private time in your private place, in your private car, in your private home, walking down the aisles of cbs. Whistling is just, to me, intrusive. Right? So it's Called Mesophonia. And it's just. Okay. So anyway, I said all that to say, my mom, when I was younger, I used to always remember her being irritated with, like, smacking. It's like, I am too. I am just learning truly how to eat well, Give me a second. But my mom would be like, megan, close your mouth. So one day, we're sitting, we're in the car, my mom's driving, and I think I had to be like six years old, right? And I'm. We're in the car, and I had a. One of my best friends growing up. My childhood best friend, her name was Joy. She's sitting in the car with me. And Joy has gum, right? And my mom says, joy is just. Just getting down on her gum, right? She is just like, her name, Joyful, okay? She's mind her business, enjoying her gum. And my mom says, all of a sudden, I said, joy, stop smacking your gum. Right? Where do you think that I got that from? I imitated what I saw. My mom used to say it all the time. My mom was always irritated by. By smacking gum. So therefore I imitated what I saw. And so sometimes I'll look at my children. Even now, I'll look at them, I'll listen to Jonah or I listen to Eli, and I kind of can see. I can see ways of me, I can see ways of their dad. Even in certain, like, facial expressions or certain hand gestures or whatever. It's like they literally imitate what they see. And so watch your ch. Children, take. Take inventory. Go and look. Just take some time and just observe your kids. What are they imitating? What. How. Like, what are they displaying? And it could be because that's what they're imitating. That's what they've gotten from you. And so I say that to encourage you that. That even. Even when you don't think that you're discipling them, your lives are discipling them. Right? Okay, let me move on. In verse 8 and 9, it says, Bind them to your hands and write them on your doorpost. So they would take scripture and write on a piece of paper, and they would put it in phylacteries and they would tie them on their forehead. And a lot of Jewish, Orthodox, orthod. Orthodox Jews, they still do this to this day. Like, they'll still bind them on their forehead and. And they'll still write scripture and put it in the doorpost of their homes. And we were in la and we were staying at. At an Airbnb, and you can tell that they were like an, an orthodox Jewish home because you could see the scriptures like on their doorposts and stuff. And so if you feel like you need to do that, that's fine. But I think how we bring that into common context and common culture is, is that you, you make the things of God in your home. Like you, you, you make it a part of your home that can be practical. You know, they have like the hobby lobby things and they'll say, ask for me in my house. We will serve the Lord. Right? Y' all remember people used to put that on over their door post. You would walk in their house and you would see that or you would see a picture of Jesus, right? The old folks, it would be a picture of Jesus, MLK and Obama, okay? It's like they, I want to make it very clear where we stand in this house. I got family members that's. That got that to this day. His Jesus, MLK and Obama, okay? That is, that's what they had. They want to make it very clear where they stand at in their home. But I think yes, we can do things in practical ways. Like if you invited a guest into your home without saying anything, what does your home give off? Now I'm not saying you have to have scriptures everywhere, but like in my house you will see scriptures in certain places. I have a gallery wall in what, what's now. It used to be my front room, but now is the, the dining room. But you'll see scriptures there. You'll see scriptures in my kids rooms. Caleb is, is non verbal. Y' all know that he has fragile X and autism. We put, we, we post the things of the Lord all over his room. Posters, scriptures make it a part. Like do, do you usher in the presence of the Lord in your home? Is it peaceful? I'm not talking about quiet, but is there peace? That's also part of discipleship. That's how we can take that scripture where it says bind them to your hands and tie it on your foreheads and put in the doorposts of your home. We can bring that into common, common context. Do you talk about scripture in your home? Do your children have a Bible? They have these little cute little cars I just got the kids not too long ago. And, and it's like a, a scripture a day or a scripture a week for them to memorize. And it breaks down the, the text and but these are, but the, like they repeating the scripture. I ask them every morning what's your scripture for this week? They repeat it to Me, okay, what does this mean to you? You? And we talk about it and I've had to work on this too, because I usually will pray and I will shut my door and I'll pray and like, my door is shut. But sometimes I've been even convicted about, no, leave your door open. Let them walk in on you praying. Let them see you get on your face before the Lord. Let them see those tears. Let them see it. That's discipleship. Let them see you. You, you go before the Lord and delight in his presence. Committed to your spiritual disciplines. Let them walk in on you working through a scripture. Let them walk in on you having a godly conversation with your homegirl. Like, let them see that. Invite them into that. Pray with them. I've been trying to, and I'm not the greatest at this. That's something I just kind of recently have been a little convicted about. But it's like not just me praying, but also putting a demand on them to pray. No, let me hear you pray. Me and Jonah kind of work this out sometimes before, like when I tuck him in, he'll be, I'll say, like, okay, let's say our prayers. But then sometimes I will make him pray, not just me pray, teaching him that you need to have your own relationship with the Lord and go before the Lord yourself. Being mindful of what is influencing them. Are you mindful of what your kids are watching on YouTube? Are you mindful of what they're watching on TV and what you allow to be taught in their home, in your home or seen in your home, what music they're listening to? I, I was on Live the other day on Instagram and we were talking about, I was talking about this and I had a question from somebody. You guys know that I'm, I'm, I'm, I've been divorced for a few years now. And so I co parent and so my kids are here with me during the week and then they're, they're with their dad on the weekend. And so I had a person that asked, like, how do you, how do you disciple your children for when you co parent and you're, and you're, you know, the other parent may not believe in the way that you believe or whatever. And, and that is a real question. And I think that that can be difficult, but I think that you just do what you can do. You should just be a good steward over what you do in your home and then do some check ins. Like, I'll check in with my kids on the weekend, like hey, you know, do you read some scripture today? You pray today? Did you do your Bible study today? Even when they're not with me. Me. But again, take the. Take the burden of their eternity off. The weight of their eternity belongs to the Lord. The Lord is sovereign and good and kind and merciful, and ultimately, he loves your kids more than you do. And so I just believe that even when they're not with me, that is that because I have made it a part of our. Our daily living, and I've deposited scripture in them, and I've deposited godly things in them and put them and surrounded them by godly things and all the stuff like God is sovereign and kind of mine, and he has them even when they're not with me, right? We see often in the New Testament that Jesus prioritizes discipleship, right? So in Mark 12, we see Jesus actually quote Deuteronomy 6. 5 when he talks about this greatest command. Matthew 7. The wise person builds their house on God's word. You want to be wise, Build your house on the word of God. God. You want to be a wise parent? Their foundation needs to be the Word of God. Matthew 22, Love God, love others. Discipleship is built on that. Discipleship is built on that loving God and loving people. I had a discipleship moment the other day, and I said, jonah, how much do you love me? He said, oh, mom, it's Jesus. And then you. And I said, really? I said, then who else? I was like, take me down the list. He said, jesus, you my dogs. I said, wait a minute now. Wait a minute, Jonah. Discipleship moment, right? We're supposed to love God and his people. Now, I'm not saying you can't love your dogs now, but the dogs don't come before the people. You got so many people to love and prioritize before you prioritize these dogs. You got brothers. You get your daddy. You got your. You got Jordan, got Jay, you got your honey. You got people. Okay? It's just. He said, jesus, my mama and my dogs. That's a discipleship moment, because the greatest command is to love God and then people, right? So I use this as a moment of opportunity. It was silly and funny. I do think he meant it. I ain't gonna hold you. I think he was serious, but it was a moment for me to include. Include the gospel and include God into that conversation. So something like that, okay? Stuff like that. There's so much that. That we can talk about that I don't think can be fit into one episode. But as your kids are going back to school, I understand that there are, There are anxieties there. There's maybe some fears. The world is crazy, right? And so there could be some fears going into letting your kids go to school as a. Maybe you're coming to the faith for the first time or coming back to the faith and. And the things of the Lord have become really serious for you. And now you're. You might have some anxieties about putting your kids in a secular environment and the things that they might be opening their. Like that they might be open to or influenced by all the things. I get it. Replace the anxiety with urgency in discipling your children, training them up in the ways of the Lord word, repeating it to them over and over again, telling them the gospel, sharing the gospel with them, teaching them what it means to love God and to follow his commands. Like, put an urgency on that. Listen, we will put an urgency on all the other things. My kid, Jonah, Eli, they play sports. They're. You know, Jonah has played in com. Competitive baseball, and he's very talented and gifted athletically. Right. And we will make all the provisions to make sure he has all he needs for this, for that gift. But your kids also have spiritual gifts that we also need to prioritize. We also need to make an emphasis and an importance on those spiritual gifts as well. Praying and asking the Lord, lord, show me ways that I can nurture and steward their spiritual gifts that you've given them them. There are so many things that come along with a new school year, but I'm telling you, don't, don't pause on discipleship because they're now in school. Make it a part of it. When my kids get home, I'm like, all right, homework. Did you get your Bible study done? You get your chores done? Okay, I make it a part of it. It's not, oh, they're in school so they don't have to read their words. They're. They're too busy to know. That's just as a priority. We're going to steward our schoolwork and we're also going to steward our spiritual lives. We're going to make an importance on both. And so. So that's my encouragement for you guys. I'm praying. I'm praying for our children this school year. I'm praying for you as parents. I'm praying that. That the Lord helps us and guides us, that the Holy Spirit empowers us to disciple our children to delight in the Lord and so that. That that passion overflows and the kids see that, that we just delight. I heard a quote from John Piper. He said, like, the Lord is most glorified when we are the most satisfied in Him. And so we. I want, I want this year, this school year, our lives, my children's lives. I want it to glorify the Lord. And that puts a demand on me to be more satisfied in the Lord. And so it starts with, with us as parents and then trickles down to our children. What gets in the head gets in the body. I do believe that. And so as we are delighting in the Lord and we prioritize intimacy with him and we prioritize loving him and, and following his commands and being obedient and submitting to him out of a place of love and honor and reverence, that will get down to our children and will make it a. A priority, not out of anxiety, but out of urgency, to disciple and discipline our children in the ways. And so I pray that this is encouraging to you as you go into the new school year. I pray that your children will love the Lord and that they will have encounters and experiences with him and His Word as we get through the 2025, 2026 school year. And so I love you guys and I pray that this was a blessing to you. All right, I'll see you next week.
- [47:17]
Megan Ashley
What's up, you guys? I hope you enjoyed this episode. Thank you so much for listening and I hope you you felt encouraged in some way. Be sure to like and follow into Tality podcast everywhere you listen to your favorite shows. Follow into Tality on Apple Podcasts or Spotify and be sure to turn on your post notifications so that you can be the first to listen whenever there's a new episode.