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Socks, underwear and T shirts Bombas are so absurdly comfortable you may throw out all your other clothes. Sorry, do we legally have to say that? No, this is just how I talk. And I really love my Bombas. They do feel that good. And they do good too. One item purchased equals one item donated. To feel good and do good, go to bombas.com and use code audio for 20% off your first purchase. That's B O M B A S dot com and use code Audio at checkout. What's up fam? Listen if you've been blessed by In Totality the podcast, then I want to personally invite you to go deeper by joining our Patreon community called the Village. Every Tuesday morning, the Village members get early access to the full episode of the podcast, so two days before it drops publicly on YouTube. So while everyone else is waiting, you're already soaking it in. But that's just the beginning. As a Village member, you get exclusive access to the In Totality Docu series. It's a behind the scenes look at how I walk on my faith in real life. No filters, no fluff. Just real moments of me trusting the Lord, processing life and growing in truth. We also do live book club club zoom calls where we read and grow together in the Word. I'm not just talking at you worth walking through it together, asking questions, wrestling through scriptures, learning to follow Christ more fully. You know, like that Romans 12. You'll also get bonus content, extra conversations with podcast guests that go even deeper, plus moments that didn't make it to the episode but were just too good not to share. And one more thing. When you join the Village, you get first access to merch before it drops public. So if you love the message and you want to rep the movement, you'll get first dibs every time. But more than the content, the village is about community. It's a safe place for believers to connect and grow and be reminded that you're not doing this walk alone. You're a part of something real. We're building something special, and we would love for you to be a part. So hit pause, go to www.patreon.com/meganashley and join today, and I'll meet you there. We are just going to answer questions from the Patreon communities. God, like, almost never agrees with my flesh. All right, you want to. You want to hear the words of Jesus, that's fine. It's like, I don't know when Christ said, not even the Son knows, girl, please, just. Please just love people. Just because you are a Christian and just because you are in Christ, you are not exempt from the human experience. That's not really a joyful conversation, but it's the truth, man. Next question. What's up, you guys? Welcome back to another episode of In Totality. I am your host, Megan Ashley, and we are just kicking it today. It's just me, Jay, and Jordan, and we are kicking it. And. And what used to be my dining room, I guess, is the podcast room now. And we are. This is gonna be like a really chill episode because we are just going to answer questions from the Patreon community. So we're just kicking it. This is kind of a raw, uncut. Like, this isn't anything I've prepared to talk about. I'm just literally answering questions from our village community, and we're just gonna get right into it. We're gonna get into some questions. Jay and Jordan are gonna help me out, and then, yeah, I'm kind of interested to see what. What everyone's asking, so let's do it. Okay, so the first question is from Alexia, and she asked, how do you navigate friendships that. With friends that are lukewarm or not in the faith? I think this is an interesting question because I think that there are a lot of people who. Who are navigating through this. A lot of people are coming to the faith, coming back to the faith. And. And it seems as if. Cause I've gotten a lot of this in my. In my DMs, where it feels like a. Are finding themselves in more isolated situations, or they feel like their. Their community is completely shifted, or it's like, yeah, I can't hang out with these friends anymore because I'm I'm trying to live a life that is pleasing to the Lord, which means that I can't be in these type of friendships anymore. And so I can understand how that can be challenging. I don't necessarily feel like you have to excommunicate with every single person that is not. That doesn't believe the same way that you believe. Right. I don't think that you have to completely, you know, abandon these people. I think that you do have to be mindful. And there probably is modification when it comes to how much time you spend, the things that you do. Right. I think. I think what can be beautiful about friendships, that maybe the other person doesn't believe or is committed to their walk in the same way that you are. I think that it can be. Be. And, like, say y' all used to go to the club together. Like, that's what y' all did. I went to the club, used to smoke and drink. And now you've given your life to the Lord, and it's like, I can't, you know, I can't hang out with you because that's all we used to do. I think it's a beautiful opportunity to find some other ways that you guys share the same interests and do those things, things that are still pleasing to the Lord and things that you also have common interest in. Because there is no better witness to me than the people who. Who see that your life has completely changed. Like when you used to live one way and then the Lord has completely changed your heart. You have a regenerated heart, and now your life is completely different. To me, there is, like, no better witness to a. To an old friend than when they. You. You stay in contact with them. You stay, but then they just see how your life has changed and how the Lord has changed your heart. And I think trying to find activities or common interests that don't. That are not dishonoring to the Lord. So, for example, maybe y' all like arcades, right? So go hang out at an arcade. Like, maybe y' all both love coffee. Go to a coffee shop. Maybe you both love the movies. Go find a. A movie that isn't, you know, completely dishonoring to the Lord, but go find a movie and go, like, go watch a movie, right? Maybe you guys like documentaries, Invite them over and watch a documentary. Maybe you guys both love food, go out to eat, right? That, like, you can go do things and. And try to. Try to invest in that friendship in a way where you're finding common interests that are still pleasing to God and And use that as an opportunity to still stay in relationship with that person, because you might be able to witness to that person over time. I'm not saying that every single time you get together with them, you got to give them the gospel. Sometimes you can just sit with people, ask them questions. Where are you at in life? You know, how. How's your mom doing? How's your family doing? What are some things that are going on at work? Like, whatever, just have. Be normal, guys. We can, we can just be normal. That's okay, too. I. Now, please don't hear me say that there are, there may be some friendships where you do have to disconnect. There might be. Do you know what I'm saying? That, that, that, that exists too. I think ultimately you have to be led by the Lord. Lord, you brought me to this place. I, I am, I, I am in need of godly community, but I still have these people in my life who I love that I don't want to completely, you know, abandon or not communicate with. So, Lord, you show me what to do. How, how to love them and still. And still be in relationship with them, but not compromise what you're doing in my life. You know what I'm saying? I just think that we have to seek the Lord and God and ask for guidance because we see through Scripture, right? Jesus was constantly hanging around tax collectors and sinners. He wasn't doing unlawful things with them, but he was like, he sat with them and ate. He wasn't scamming people in taxes just because he was with the tax collector, but he sat and ate with them, right? He wasn't involved in prostitution because he hung out with prostitutes, but he sat with them, talked to him, right? So I'm saying you don't have to in order for us to be friends. It's like, oh, I, I only have to go do sinful things with you. That's not, that's not the case either. You can love people. You can sit with them, love them, go to dinner with them, get lunch with them. Do you know what I'm saying? I think, I just think that that's a beautiful way to witness to people when you continue to love them even though your life has changed, but you continue to love them and you continue to, to offer opportunities to, to witness, even by just living your life in the way that's honoring to the Lord and letting that be a witness to them, right? And not shaming them. Because now your life has changed. So now you're going to shame them and be like, oh, you need to stop doing this and this and this. Just because the Lord did that in your heart doesn't mean that you have the right to force them into that. You know what I'm saying? Like, it is the Lord that draws people. So allow your life to be a witness and just continue to love them. But seek and ask the Lord. There may be some people that you have to. Hey, in this season of my life, I don't know if we're going to be able to be as close as we were. I don't know if I'm going to be able to be as invested into this friendship as I was before. But I think the Holy Spirit needs to reveal that to you and not just, oh, I'm godly, you're not. So we're not friends anymore. Does that make sense, what I'm saying? I hope that makes sense. It's just like, seek the Lord and just, I don't know, the greatest commandment. Love the Lord, your God, with all your heart, all your mind on your soul, and love your neighbor. You still have to love them. That's. That's all I'm saying. So love them. Okay, so this is from Les. Shout out to Les. How do you steward godly friendships? The biggest thing that I can say about stewarding godly friendships is having a. A devoted prayer life. Like, if you want to learn how to steward relationships well, you need to have a prayer life. And I just don't know how you can steward relationships well and not have a prayer life. Right? Like, stewarding your relationship. Like, prioritizing your relationship with the Lord and your intimacy with the Lord gives you better. I don't know, allows you to be a better friend. And I talked about this, like, when I went through the whole transition in my life, it was like, I. I wanted to be the Lord's friend. And I prioritize knowing him, prioritize reading his word. Like, I wanted to be his friend. And I think in doing that, he cultivated in me a better way to be other people's friend. And so I just think that, like, your prayer life, like, pray for your friends. Pray bring them before the Lord when your friend is telling you, like, hey, man, today was hard. Da, da, da, da, da. Take that before the Lord, asking your friends, how can I pray for you this week? How can I pray for you today? You know what I mean? Like, keep checking in on them. And. And I'm. I'm. Be honest. I don't know if I do well with a lot of people. Like I. I have a very small number of people I'm close to. Right. And I just don't know if I'm the greatest at being a good steward over, like, more of my broader friendships, if that makes sense. Like, I have friends in my life, and, you know, I love them, but I'm not the greatest with checking in sometimes. I'm not the greatest with responding to texts. I'm just. That sometimes can be really hard for me. But I know that it's something that I need to work on because I know it can feel as if they're not being loved or I don't care about them. I don't know. I'm just being transparent, honest. Sometimes that's a little hard for me. But the people that are, like, really close in my life, it's like a daily thing. So that's a little different where I'm checking in kind of daily or weekly or whatever. But, yeah, those more broader friendships are kind of hard for me, to be honest. And I think that I'm still kind of navigating and working through, you know, fear, trauma, all the things in regards to relationships and friendships if I'm just being honest. And so I, I. I do my best to just take it one day at a time, but if I had to overall say, what is the best way to steward godly friendships, I h. I just. I would say pray. Like, pray. And even. Even in those kind of broader friendships, if. If they hit my phone and they're like, hey, I'm going through this, I. I make a commitment to stop where I am and pray for them immediately. Like, I don't say, oh, yeah, I'm. I'm gonna pray for you, and then I don't get around to it. But I think, like, that's a big thing, too, is like, okay, how can I pray for you? And then praying right in there. So I. Yeah, I just think overall, having a prayer life is what's gonna give you a better way to steward godly friendships. Having a consistent intimacy with the Lord and having a prayer life and being committed to bringing those. Those friends and those relationships before the Lord and allowing him to lead and guide you in those relationships. So hopefully that makes sense. Okay, so from Bria, when. How do you know when you're being led by God or by your emotions? Oh, wow. I think that this is a. That's a good question. I'm trying to think of how to answer it. I think that, for me, my emotions have always led me to fleshly responses. I think that you can feel what you feel. And then taking that before the Lord, like, okay, I feel this way now, Lord, you tell me what to do with these feelings. Do you know what I'm saying? Because feelings are indicators. Feelings. You feel something that's indicating. That's a. It's an indicator. Like you. I'm sure you guys have heard the example of. It's like that little check light engine that come. The light that comes on your car. Well, that. That. That warning isn't. Is a indicator that something's going on with the engine or when you're low on gas, that warning is telling you you're low on gas. Right? And so your feelings are similar to that, where you have feelings and it's. And it's showing you something that's. It's an indicator of something that's happening in your heart. Right? That question I feel like, how do you know if it's. If it's God or how do you know if it's your emotions? I feel like emotions are fleeting. They come and they go. Right. If it's something that the Lord has placed on your heart, then he won't let it. Just like, it's not just gonna go away. It's like, okay, this is something that I'm feeling. I'm sensing that the Lord has placed on my heart and not just I'm being emotional. Because your emotions come and go. They're fleeting. And so if it's something that just comes and goes, I think regardless of whatever the feelings that you have, you should always take that before the Lord. Right? But I feel like if it's a constant thing that's coming up, then it's like, okay, maybe the Lord is impressing on my heart something that I need to explore. This is where healthy discipleship and community can help. Help praying and seeking answers and clarity in God's word. Wise counsel. Hey, this feeling keeps coming up. Or this. This thing. I'm sensing this thing strongly in my heart, like, wise counsel. This is why you need community. Like, I think that's a thing to help kind of decipher or discern. Like, if this is God or if this is me. Does these feelings agree with his word? Like, can you find agreement in God's word regarding that feeling? And so, yeah, I think that there are ways to kind of navigate and to discern whether it's you or God. I just know for me, my. My flesh. God, like, almost never agrees with my flesh. So it's like he just doesn't. And so I think that seeking the Lord, seeking His word. Praying, like, just pray without ceasing. If you keep feeling this thing, just keep praying and asking the Lord for clarity. The Lord isn't. What I do know is that the Lord is kind and he is not manipulative or what's the word? He's not petty. Like, he's not trying to hide something from you. You know what I'm saying? He's not trying to keep something from you that He. Like he's not hanging a carrot over your head, you know what I'm saying? Like, he's a kind and faithful and good shepherd. And so I think presenting your, your cares, your worries, your feelings to him, you can do that with confidence that he cares for you and that he will lead you in the right way, right? Proverbs 3. Trust in the Lord with all your heart. Lean not into your own understanding. In all your ways, acknowledge him and he will direct your path. So I think it's like, know that the Lord loves you. Trust that he loves you. Right? Take everything before him and trust that he will direct your path. Like, he will give you clarity, he will give you discernment. He will give you wisdom. The Bible says that he gives wisdom generously if for those who ask. So just ask him, ask him, keep seeking him, get in his word, get some godly counsel, get some godly community, and then allow the Lord to speak to you through. Through those means. So Asia said, what does it look like to love people well, by God's definition of. Of love. God's definition of love. Are you patient? Are you kind? Right? What is it? First Corinthians 13. So First Corinthians 13:4, it says, Love is patient. Love is kind. Love does not envy. It is not boastful. It is not arrogant, it is not R. It is not self seeking, it is not irritable. It does not keep a record of wrongs. Love finds no joy in unrighteousness, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, and hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. So I guess for me, like when you look at scriptures like this, and then when you look at Ephesians 4, where it says, Paul says, therefore I, a prisoner in the Lord, urge you to live worthy of the calling you have received with all humility, gentleness, patience, bearing with one another in love, making every effort to keep unity of the spirit through the bond of peace. I think those. Like when I think about how to love people well, and let me tell you something, guys, it is hard to love people the way God calls us to love without fully relying on the Holy Spirit. Like, you need to be dependent on the Holy Spirit to really love people. Because like so much of, of what the word defines love as is such an inward heart work. Like it's, it's, that's, that takes the power of the Holy Spirit. Because it's easier to be impatient, it's easier to be unkind, it's easier to be irritable, right? I am an irritable person, so it is so easy for me to be irritable. It can be the smallest thing and I'm irritated. It's like, why did you look like that? Why did you just pick up that fork like that for no reason? Just irritable. And, and so I think reading scriptures like this is like, okay, I, I have to recognize that when I'm doing that, when there's a lack of patience, when there's a lack of kindness, when there's a lack of peace, when there's a lack of pursuit of unity, then I have to identify that I'm not loving well. I'm not loving well when I'm short, when I'm, when I'm not being mindful of my tone, I'm not loving well. And so what does it look like to love people? Well? It looks like the way scripture tells us, right? Where it looks selfless. Love is selfless. It is selfish to just be impatient. That's about you. But patience meet that like puts the other person's needs above yours. Being unkind is selfish, but being kind is loving is putting that person's needs before you, putting that person's feelings above yours. And so I think that, I think that we, we live in such a culture where it is promoting such self centeredness and we're not loving people well. We're not seeing people as an image bearer. Like seeing, like seeing someone and saying, okay, they were created in the image of God and they deserve dignity, they deserve respect, they deserve honor and love. I don't have to like you to love you. I don't ha. I don't have to agree with you all the time to love you. But as a Christian, I do have to love you. That's what the Bible says. The Bible, the Bible says, how can you love a God that you don't see when you don't love the neighbor that you do see? And so I, I think that it's important that we ask the Holy Spirit, right? Because these are, these are fruit of the Spirit, patience, love. So even In Galatians where it talks about the fruit of the spirit, that's Galatians 6, I believe Galatians 5, 5, 22 it says, but the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self control, right? That's the fruit of the Spirit. So by having the Holy Spirit, that's the fruit that comes from having the Holy Spirit, right? So how can I love? How can I be patient? How can I have kindness and faithfulness and gentleness if I don't have the Holy Spirit? You want to love people well, then you need to. You. You need the Holy Spirit. The Holy Spirit has to work through you to love people well. The fruit of the Holy Spirit, love, patient kindness, patience, gentleness, faithfulness, self control, those are fruit of the spirits. Then when we go to Seth 1st Corinthians and it says, love is patient, love is kind, right? Love isn't self seeking. It's not irritable. It doesn't keep records of wrongs. So, so am I loving people? Well, do I, Do I keep record of every time they hurt me? Do I bringing up. Bring those things up in arguments? I remember what. Remember when you said da da da da da or remember when you did? That's not loving. Well, am I putting my needs before their needs? That's not love. What's up, you guys? This ad is brought to you by Better Help Prayer. Reading Scripture and Healthy Communities are great outlets for sharing the struggles we face in life. For me, those three things are the foundation. I've also learned that there are times when it's necessary to talk to a trained professional to help process my thoughts and to grow. 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Like, I haven't loved you well. The other day I was mad and I didn't love you well. The other day I was irritable, I was short. I wasn't patient in that conversation. I wasn't patient. I wasn't kind. I. I repent. I was not loving you well. Ask for forgiveness from the Lord if you see some areas where you haven't loved well. Because loving people well is also, you know, not loving people well. It's not just a dishonor to them, but it's a dishonor to the Lord. It's like you haven't just sinned against them, but you've also sinned against God. Right? When we don't love well. And so I'm not saying that you have to be perfect, but when you fall short, you know, be humble enough to be like, hey, I. I repent. I did not love you well. How. And, and be curious to ask your friends, how can I love you better? Are there some areas where I can be a better friend? Are there some areas where I can. I can show up for you better? Right? I know we live in this age where it's like, it's all about me, me, me, me, me. But that's just not what, as Christians, that's just not what we're called. That's not the type. Okay, real quick, guys, question. Have you ever needed money faster than your next paycheck? Maybe it's a car repair, groceries for the week, or a surprise Build that just cannot wait. Those mom and they don't care whether your payday is two weeks away. You shouldn't have to wait for a calendar date to use what you've already earned. Earn in lets you tap into your pay the moment Real Life asks for it. Earnin is an app that lets you access your pay as you earn it up to $150 a day with a max of $750 between paydays. Just download the Earn an app and add your info. Then start accessing your pay as you work and leave an optional tip to help keep the app running for everyone. Any money you access plus tips are automatically repaid from your next paycheck. It's your money. This is not a payday loan. 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Visit Earnin.com for full details. Download Earning today and take control of your pay. All right guys, back to the conversation type of life we're called to. The greatest of all is the servant. That's what Christ said. The greatest of all, the kingdom is Servant First. How are you serving your friends? How are you loving them? How are you praying for them? How are you like? How are you kind? How are you patient? Like? Take inventory of that and be and be humble enough to ask your friends, hey, is there some areas where I can love you better and then repent and move on with. With the power of the Holy Spirit, right by the fruit of the Spirit empowering you to love them the right way. So I just think that that's important. I think that it's. It's hard to be. It's so hard to try to do this independent of The Holy Spirit. Like, I really just believe that, like, you need the Holy Spirit to be a good friend. You know what I'm saying? It's not just about being a good person, but it's about being a devoted disciple of the Lord and having His Holy Spirit work in you to love people well and doing it out of a, out of a overflow of your appreciation and your gratitude towards the Lord. Like, I'm honoring people because that honors the Lord. I'm kind because that pleases the Lord. I consider my neighbor above myself because that pleases the Lord. That's what that, like, he, he's pleased with that, not because it gains me points, not because it makes me look good, but because it's pleasing to him. So I guess that's my long way of saying, yeah, like, look in the Bible, read, read First Corinthians, read Galatians, read Ephesians about unity and all the things like, and then, and then, you know, take inventory of your heart from there and ask your friends, like, hey man, I want to love you better. Is there a way that I can show up better for you? So love is self sacrificing. At the end of the day, that is love. And the ultimate example we have of that is Christ. Like, for, for God so loved us that he gave right, his only begotten Son. He gave. He loved us first and he gave. Christ loved us and sacrificed his life. Right? And so love is sacrificial. Love is selfless. Love gives. Love is not contingent upon how you feel or what someone does for you. It's self sacrificing. And so I just think that it's important that we keep, I think, keeping the gospel in the forefront of your mind all the time, keeping a reminder, like reminding yourself of, of, of your salvation and what that means, what it cost. I think that that provokes you to love differently. You're, you're, you're, you're reminded that this is not about you, that that's our example. Like, Christ sacrificed even when he. And he was right, sinless, spotless. And he took on our sins, our iniquities, drank from the cup that we deserved, left his like Father in heaven, like, do you understand? I'm saying, came down, took on the image of a human, bore our sins, emptied himself of his divinity. Do you understand? Like, I think if we think about what he did for us, I, I feel like you are provoked to honor him by honoring people. Do you understand? Like, I don't know. I just think that we have to keep I think putting the gospel in the forefront of our minds changes every, everything of how we live. It changes how we live by keeping what Christ did for us in the forefront of our minds. It changes how we live. It changes how we, we interact with people. It changes our relationships. It changes how we love people, it changes how we honor people. It changes how we allow ourselves to stay in our feelings. Like, it just changes things. And so, yeah, I think, yeah, that like love itself, love is self sacrificing. And so I just think that we have to be mindful of that wisdom. She asked, what are some truths about the Lord that have helped you endure suffering? And what's one thing you still find hard to understand or handle when it comes to suffering? I think suffering is. I mean, I feel like I could do a whole. I could talk about suffering for hours. Because I think that, I think that it's the one theology that we don't talk enough about when it comes to Christianity. Like, I just don't think that we have a, all the time we have a proper theology on suffering. I think that it is very clear in, in scripture from the words of Christ, from the words of Paul, we got James, we got Peter where we are to expect suffering. Like the, the Lord says, in this life you will face many trials. So, so there, there should be an expectation that we will suffer in some way. Now we may not suffer in the way that the early church did where they're being dragged to be crucified and, and, and stoned. And who was it John that was like boiled or like, it's cra. Like we, there, we don't experience those type of sufferings, especially in the Western world. Now there are our brothers and sisters on, on the east coast, right, that are, that are being persecuted in ways that we have not had to experience here. But I just believe that whether it's mental stuff or whether it's relational things, financial things, children, whatever, like, we should expect as Christians that we are going to face trials, right? So I'll just, I'll just take us through a few scriptures that we know, okay? We're like, this gives us context that we're gonna, we're gonna suffer. One of, one of the scriptures that I always kind of have to remind myself about is in First Peter. And I really highly suggest that everyone goes in like to the Acts 2:42 page and watch. We did a live check in, Jackie And I, and Dr. Sarita talked about suffering and she just, she messed us up. Like, it was so good. Okay, so you have first Peter 4, and then you have Peter saying in verse 12, Dear friends, do not be surprised when the fiery ordeals come among you to test you as if something unusual is happening to you. Instead, rejoice as you share in the sufferings of Christ so that you may also rejoice with great joy when his glory is revealed. It's like, okay, I know that as a Christian, I should not be shocked when I face trials when I suffer. I. If they're just because you are a Christian and just because you are in Christ, you are not exempt from the human experience. I think I heard this from Tim Keller. Not, I don't know if it was this morning or the other day, but he said something like. Like, if it can happen to a human, it can happen to a Christian. Like, you are not exempt because you're a Christian. Life is life, humanity. The, the human experience is a human experience. Now, as a Christian, you can endure differently, right? Because it tells us in. We have here in James 1. Consider it great joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you experience various trials, because you know that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its full effect so that you are mature and complete, lacking nothing. Going over to Romans, right? We have Paul that says, and not only that, but we rejoice in our afflictions because we know that the afflictions produce endurance. Endurance produce. Produces proven character, and proven character produces hope. And that hope will not disappoint us because God's love has been poured out on our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us. I'm just showing you that there are exam. All right, you want to, you want to hear the words of Jesus, that's fine. So you have here in John 16:33, I have told you these things so that in me you may have peace. You will suffer. You will have sufferings in this world. You will suffer in this world. You will suffer. You will have suffering in this world. You will. You will. Hello. Hello. Will. You will have suffering in this world. Be courageous. I have conquered the world. These are the words of Jesus. He doesn't say you might, doesn't say slim chance. He gives you a guarantee that you will suffer. And so we have to stop with this, this false theology that because you're in Christ, you're not going to suffer. We are going to suffer in this world. And, and, and you're going to face many different trials, many different sufferings. But we have a hope that it won't always be this way. Romans 8, I talk about this scripture all the time. For I. Yeah. Romans 8:18. For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing to the glory that is going to be revealed to us. We're gonna suffer, but it doesn't compare to what we are going to be re. What's going to be revealed to us when Christ returns. There are some sufferings that we might have in this world that might be continuous. There might be some sufferings that the Lord delivers us from it. It just is what it is. But we don't have to suffer without help. We don't have to suffer. Suffer without hope. And we. We don't have to suffer alone. For we do not serve a high priest who is unable to empathize with us, but instead emptied himself of his divinity. Hebrews 4. For we do not have a high priest who is unable to sympathize with our weakness, but one who has been tempted in every way as we are yet without sin. Therefore, let us approach the throne of grace with boldness so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in time of need, so we can approach the Lord with boldness. He sympathizes with us. He was tempted in every way, yet without sin. And so now we get to approach his grace, his throne of grace with boldness, knowing that we are going to find help. You have Paul over here with a thorn in his side. He asked for. For God to remove the thorn three times. And. And. And the Lord said no, for my grace is sufficient. I got you. It might hurt, it might suck, it might be. It might crush you emotionally. But I got you. And this is temporary. It won't always be like this. You have a promise. I always revert back to Revelation 21, where we have a promise that God. That Christ is going to come back and he's going to make all things new. There is going to be no more crying, no more weeping, no more sadness, no more hard times, no more trials, no more suffering. All of that will be gone. We have a promise. And I know that pain has a way of manipulating our brains. Because when you're in pain, all you know is pain. There. It's hard to see yourself outside of that. But this too shall pass. It won't last forever. Hold on to the unchanging hand of the Lord, knowing that he has you and that the suffering that you are experiencing is not going to compare to the glory that will be revealed. But stop listening to a false gospel that tells you that suffering isn't real, that God doesn't want you to suffer or God wouldn't allow for you to suffer. That's not true. We see it all through here. Even the red words of Jesus says, in this life you will suffer. We have to have a proper theology on suffering that, that it, like, we are going to face trials, but it's producing in us great things. It's producing characters, producing perseverance, it's producing faithfulness. Stop trying to avoid suffering, but instead, like, expect it. Expect that. It's like, like Peter said, like, don't be surprised. Don't be surprised. Okay, Lord, I'm gonna lean into you. Every, Every suffering has an opportunity. You're either going to allow the Lord to leverage that suffering or you're going to allow the enemy to leverage it. Those are your options. Who am I going to have let. Who am I going to let leverage this? The enemy or the Lord? Those are your options. But guess what's not your option? Never suffering. That's not an option. In this life. You will face trials. You will. But you can take, you can have hope. Because Christ overcame that. He conquered death, hell in the grave, right? That he ascended and he is seated at the right hand of the Father, waiting, just waiting on. On the Word to come back. Waiting on God to say, okay, now. And when he comes back, he's going to make all things new. The sufferings won't compare to the glory that will be revealed to us. Hold on to that. That the Lord has you and that he loves you and that even in the suffering, he's like, he works all things out for the good of those who love him and are called according to their purpose, confor them into the image of His Son. Well, what does that mean? Well, Christ suffered, so we're going to suffer. We get to identify more in Christ because we suffer. We get to share in the power of his resurrection and in the fellowship of his suffering. Philippians 3:10. So, yeah, so this is where Paul says that my goal is to know him in the power of his resurrection and in the fellowship of his suffering. That, that, like, we have to know that what it is to be a Christian is that you experience the power of the Holy Spirit, but you also receive suffering and you felt like you know him not just because of the power of the resurrection, but you also know him in the fellowship of his suffering. That should be our goal, is to know him fully in both ways. And so I think. I think that we would. We would get through suffering with more grace if we humble ourselves in expecting that we will Suffer. As Christians, I think we'll get through it with more grace, more power, more. More intimacy with the Lord. Because if you don't, if you live a life not expecting to suffer when it comes, you'll be angry at God. Then you'll pull away from him because you feel like, well, I'm a Christian, I shouldn't suffer. But that's not, that's not the gospel. That's not the truth. And so go read. Go read Romans, go read first Peter, go read James, go read Jude. Like, go read these books and get a proper theology on suffering. I think it would make us much more faithful Christians if we would, like, have a proper context of what suffering is and why it's necessary that we expect it. You know, that's not really a joyful conversation, but it's the truth, man. I'm sorry. Yeah. So anyway, next question. Girl, Andrea, as when is the new merge dropping? Girl, please. It. It's, you know, truthfully. Truthfully in the way that it's like when, when, when Christ said, not even the Son knows when the Father is going to send him. It's like, I don't know when it's done. Hopefully. No, seriously, in all seriousness, hopefully by October. Hopefully by October. So this question, this is interesting. So it. The question is how, how do you know when to call out sin or if I should call out sin or character flaws in someone else? I think this question is really interesting because we live in a hypercritical culture. We feel like it is in the Bill of Rights to criticize. It's like it is your duty to find something wrong with somebody and to criticize them. I think that my prayer is that we, as Christians, right, the world is going to do what the world wants to do. So I'm always answering these questions. I'm. I try my best to answer this from a biblical lens, from a biblical foundation in a way that is honoring and pleasing to the Lord. And so for me, I'm going to say that I. My prayer is that we would be more curious before we are critical. If you are observing something right, and you feel that this is unrighteous, you feel like this is a flaw, a character flaw, an integrity issue, whatever. My prayer is that before we are quick to prop up our phones, give a ted talk on TikTok, do a whole reel about someone's shortcomings or flaws or whatever before we decide to write a whole dissertation on threads or X, whatever you use. My prayer is that we would be curious that we would ask questions, not publicly but like going to the Lord. I want to read Titus 3. Okay. It says, remind them to submit to. To rulers and authorities, to obey and be ready for every good work. To slander no one, to avoid fighting and to be kind. Always showing gentleness to all people. For we too were once foolish, disobedient, deceived, enslaved by various passions and pleasures, living in malice and envy, hateful, detesting one another. But when the kindness of God our Savior and his love for mankind appeared, he saved us not by works of righteousness that we had done, but according to his mercy, through the washing of regeneration and renewal by the Holy Spirit. He poured out His Spirit on us abundantly through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that have been justified by his grace. We may become heirs with hope of eternal life. This saying is trustworthy. I want you to insist on these things so that those who have believed God might be careful to devote themselves to good works. These are good and profitable for everyone. But avoid foolish debates, genie genealogies, quarrels and disputes about the law, because they are unprofitable and worthless. Reject a divisive person after a first and second warning. For you know that such person has gone astray in sinning. He is self condemned anyway. I don't think. Think all of that was necessary. But the thing that I wanted to point out the most is that in. In the beginning of this of go. Titus 3, it says, to slander no one, avoid fighting and be kind. Always showing gentleness to all people. Remembering that there was a time that you were far from God. Remembering that there was a time where you messed up. And so instead of looking and being like, oh, I need to call this out. I think that that needs to be like. That needs to be carefully considered with and. And taken into prayer. It's kind of like if you're babysitting somebody, right? You're babysitting somebody's kids. If I see bad behavior, I'm going to kind of try to course correct as best I can. But ultimately I'm gonna go to their parent and ask their parent what? Like I'm gonna. I'm gonna go to their parent because guess what? That's who that child belongs to. So when you are seeing things and you're discerning things, or you're seeing something and you feel like you have the urge to call it out immediately, I would. I would admonish you and encourage you to pause and be curious before you criticize, pause and say, lord, what am I discerning? What am I seeing? What. How do you want me to respond to this? Show me your heart for this person. Allow me to see them through the lens of, of love and compassion. Be gentle. I, I just don't feel like it's always our place to call everything out. Do you know what I'm saying? I just think that we have to be mindful to lead with love. Remembering what Christ has done for you, remembering that there was a time where you didn't have a regenerated heart, remembering a time that you were in sin, remembering God's love and faithfulness and kindness and mercy that he had given you. So then we should be moving that same way with people. Pray for them. You don't like what they're doing, pray for them. Ask the Lord. Lord, how can I intercede on their behalf? Lord, is this a person that you want me to, like, say something to? How about even. How about just reaching out? Like, hey, instead of, like, setting up a whole YouTube account dedicated to calling people out. I think that there is a time and place for everything. I think that we have to test everything, that we have to be curious before we criticize, that we have to see. Sometimes the things that the Lord is allowing you to see isn't licensed for you to say. And I've learned this the hard way. I, you, I, I feel like I, I have, you know, a level of wisdom and a level of discernment where I would be able to see certain things. And in my pride and arrogance, I'm like, oh, well, if I see it, I'm calling it out. Oh, bet. Calling it out, you need to da, da, da, da. Just arrogant and prideful. Everything that the Lord allows you to see isn't licensed for you to say. Sometimes what he's allowing you to see is the opportunity to seek. Let me go seek the Lord about what I'm seeing. Let me go seek the Lord about what I'm perceiving from this person. Doesn't mean you have the license to say every little thing. We, we. There's plenty of examples where prophets are, are going before the Lord, before the Lord is sending them to go say something. They're not just seeing stuff and saying it. They're getting what they, what they're supposed to say from the Lord. How often, how much time are you invested in seeking the Lord on what you're seeing? Am I seeking more than I'm speaking or am I speaking more than I'm seeking? Because let's be real, you can discern all you want. You don't know more than God. You don't. Like Jesus was calling things out in the Pharisees because he was God and he could discern what they were thinking. He was re. Like he could know what they were. They. He was responding to questions that they weren't asking out of their mouths. We see that through the New Testament all the time, right? In the Gospels, we see that you don't have that power, ma', am, sir, whoever. You don't have the power. You cannot see the. The. The inner workings of people's hearts. Yes, we can see fruit. We can discern righteously through. Through fruit and all the things and testing the spirit. Yes. But it's only the Lord that knows the heart of a man. We don't. And so I just think that we have to lead with gentleness. We have to pray and discern and seek the Lord before we are saying. I think it needs to go in that order. I think you need to seek the Lord. You allow him to. If he lets you see something, seek. Before you say, I'm going to seek the Lord before I say something, I'm going to seek the Lord before I have a full opinion about something. I'm going to be curious about what the Lord thinks about this thing before I'm critical about what I'm seeing or before I'm critical about what that person is doing. For we have all fallen short, y'. All. We have all there. The Bible says is there. There's not one righteous one. None of us are righteous. Our righteousness is a filthy rags. I'm not saying don't listen to the Lord and not be obedient. But I am saying let's. Let's. Let's get in our word, right? Let's take inventory on how we should respond. Let's seek the Lord and let's be led by the Holy Spirit and how we're responding to things. It is not always our oper. Our. Our place and our right to call out every little thing. It's just not. Sometimes it's like those situations like when I have with Eli and. And. And Jonah. And like Eli and Jonah would be arguing about something and I have to correct one of them and then the other one's like, yeah, see, it's like, oh, I didn't ask for your help. I actually didn't ask for that. Now you're wrong. Now I gotta correct you because you think I need your help correcting them. Some. Sometimes it's just not your place. And if you are more critical, then you are curious and you are more mean. And. And whatever. Before you're gentle and kind and loving, like, we gotta take inventory. We have to take inventory. Remember what Christ did for you. And you should be. You should have more of a. A track record of. Of. Of grace and gentleness and love and compassion and being empathetic and being comforting than you have of being critical and harsh and mean and rude. What would be pleasing to the Lord and. And know that people's salvation isn't on you. It is the Lord that saves. Exalt him. Lift his name up. He is the one that draws people unto himself. I don't think that you have to be mean. I don't. I just don't. And so, yeah, I think that ultimately seek before you say, be curious before you criticize. Some of y' all need to get godly community and know what kitchen table talk is. Old folks used to be like, that's kitchen table talk. You talk of it like you. You share your opinions around, like, godly, like, you know what I'm saying? I'm not call you homegirl and be like, girl, what you think about this? Not in a gossipy way, but, like, let's get some wisdom. Am I discerning this correctly? Get wise counsel. It doesn't mean that you need to, like, jump on your phone and call people out. I just think that we have to be mindful. So anyway, I can go on a whole tangent about that, but just, please, just love people, be mindful, be curious before you're critical. Okay? That's all I'm saying. And you might be right. Truthfully, you know what I'm saying. Some things that you discern could be correct, but I do think that you need to get your instruction from the Lord on how you proceed with what you're saying. Get the instruction from the Lord. Nathan is calling out David. It says, and the Lord sent Nathan to say X, Y, and Z. The Lord sent him, not. Nathan just decided upon himself to go say whatever he wanted to say. The Lord sent Nathan. And so I think, yeah, like, if the Lord is sending you to confront, then he'll give you what to say at the right time that you could trust that he will give you wisdom and. And he will give you power for the. From the Holy Spirit to give you what to say. But I think we need to start with seeking the Lord and getting our instructions from him first. Okay, so, yeah, I was. A ton of questions I did not get to. But maybe we'll do like, another one here in the next couple weeks. We'll do like, another little Q A. But to my village community, I love you guys so much. Thank you for your questions. I pray that, that there were something in here to encourage you. I know we talked about, we talked about relationships, we talked about godly friends, ungodly friends. We talked about what to call out criticism. All that. We talked about so many things. So I pray that something in this conversation encouraged you, helped you, even maybe convicted you a little bit if it was necessary. But I pray that it was edifying overall. So to my village community, I love you guys and for anyone. Again, if you're looking for a community of believers to encourage you to to walk with you on this journey, we have Bible studies, we have bonus contents. You get the episode early. All the great stuff. Even the merch. We talked about merch. When the merch coming? Well, village gets the merch first. So all of that. If you want to be a part of it, go to www.patreon.com MeganAshley and join the village community today. And I will see you guys next week. What's up you guys? I hope you enjoyed this episode. Thank you so much for listening and I hope you felt encouraged in some way. Be sure to like and follow Into Tality podcast everywhere you listen to your favorite shows. Follow into Tality on Apple Podcasts or Spotify and be sure to turn on your post notifications so that you can be the first to listen whenever there's a new episode.