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Welcome to It's a Good Life, where it's all about helping entrepreneurs think, feel, and do better. Today we have a special treat for you, Brian, live on stage from a recent event. Let's listen in here it is. Doing your best. So what does it get down to? It. It starts, believe it or not, with this. Your values, your principles, and your motivation. So this is doing. This is the doing side. This is what ultimately, believe it or not, makes you burn out. Your values will make you burn out. Your principles will make you burn out, and your motivation will make you burn out. It's the key because it's why you do what you do. Are any of those things your values, your principles, your motivation, Are any of those things bad? Yes or no? No. A knife isn't bad unless you stick it in your eye. I've said to people all the time, God gave me a calling and a mission. So why do I burn out? So I have a calling, I have a set of gifts, and I end up burning out. I have a calling. God given calling, God given gifts. And why do I burn out? Because I pursue God's calling with God's gifts, Brian's way. That's how I get in trouble. That's how it is. That's the formula. So we're going to talk about that. So these are all fabulous things that we have to have. They're part of what makes you do, first of all, your values. It's a personal principles or standards of behavior or a judgment of what's important in life. Powerful one. Worth the photograph if you want it. It's in the book. Starts with your priorities. What's your priorities again? So I can say my faith, I can say my family. Why did I have a jet for 17 years? Because I saw the speaking business, a trail of tears and broken marriages and broken families. And I'm like, great. I love this calling. I love what I do. But I'm gonna be in Houston in the morning, and I'm gonna be home and I'm gonna have dinner with the kids and I'm gonna yell at the referees at their game that night. Cause the kids really need me to do that. And there were times I did that too much. Sometimes the kids are like, hey, dad, why don't you take the extra day? Not because I was shouting at the ref, but because my values were burning so hot for me. They're like, hey, dad, you don't have to be at every game. Are you guys with me? It's okay if you took a day for the first 20 years traveling this country, I was everywhere and saw nothing. And now I smell the roses a little bit, play a little golf, I'll take a little trip, go on the trolley tour. I've seen things I have never seen before. Taking in a little break. So I'm going to travel, I'm going to go. But what are the priorities? We say contact care and community is a priority. Is that true? How many of you need to recruit somebody? Could I see your hands? How many of you need some recruits? Great. How many of you say it's hard to get to. Could I see your hands? Okay. How many of you have the calls, notes and Popeyes? How many of you know it's a priority? Could I see your hands? How many of you say there's room for improvement? Could I see your hands? Great. So here's your quote. I want you all to take a photograph of this one. It's my all time top five. Instead of saying I don't have time, try saying it's not a priority and then see how it feels. So let's try that phrase. 1, 2, 3. It's not a priority. Don't say it out loud. It's not a priority. What about contacting my database? Say it out loud. How about caring for my database? Say it out loud. Building a community with my database, recruiting great agents, leading my team well, writing personal notes to my team, writing notes to their families, putting on parties. I got too close there, didn't I? So what's the phrase? Instead of saying I don't have time, say so what that means is listen, rather than beat you up with that, which I already have, everything can't be a priority. My father had a foreman in the paint crew and his name was Tommy White. Longo was his nickname. He was a great soccer player. But back then they didn't play the soccer players very much money. So during the season he was like a magician with a soccer ball. But they didn't pay very much money in League of Ireland. And so the men, I'll refer to him as the great Longo White. And he referred to himself in that as, I'm the great Longo White. And he has a great little character. And he worked for my dad his whole life. And he'd say, when we were kids, we'd go in to work in the job site. And we loved going to work because there was these old characters that were just, I mean the classic Irish characters full of one liners. And you'd show up for work as a kid and you go, Mr. White, what do you want me to work on? And he'd look you in the eye and he goes, do everything first. And because we're Irish, we got the humor in that, we would laugh. How about a little painter on the south side of Ireland who wrote a little Honda 50 to work every day had more insight than most of the leadership programs I've ever been to. Certainly more than all the influencers I see online giving advice. Because everybody says you got to do everything first. And by the way, the morning routine. No one's a bigger fan of the morning routine, but people are now slavish to the 73 things they have to do before at 8am Are you with me? Otherwise, wwsuck.com so actually, I had one guy the other day said, I have so much in my morning routine now, I start the night before. So what's a priority is a priority. That's the key. It's just what's a priority is a priority. Being stubborn. Second, where'd you spend your time and your money? Those are your priorities. If you're going to do versus be, that's your priority. That's what you want to do. Where do you spend your time? Where do you spend your money? Don't tell me where your priorities are. Show me where you spend your money. I'll tell you what they are. James Frick. Next. Your values are your criteria for making decisions. These are all great things. It's fantastic stuff. It's who you are. It's your priorities. It's where you spend your time and your money. And it's your criteria for making decisions. They're all a gift. They're all powerful. They're all fantastic. That's what make you who you are. You're living by your values. And you can do them to the point that you what? Born out the great Roy Disney. So Roy was Walt's brother, Walt. He had a house in Cork in Ireland, a big sailboat he went to every year. He was a legend in Southern Ireland. And he says, when your values are clear, your decisions are easy. So he was the guy. Walt goes, hey, I want to make this happen. He was the guy that kind of made it happen. So, next. Your principles. Very good. Your values are important. Your principles, a rule or standard, especially of ethical behavior, Very, very important. So just to define it, what are you not willing to accept? What are you not willing to accept? What's not acceptable? Like, there's just certain things to me that are not acceptable. If someone in my company mistreats another Employee not acceptable. Like, if that's a pattern, gone now. And any leader that tolerates it in my company, they're gone too. Like mistreating a fellow employee is just non negotiable to me. I will fire a client who mistreats my staff. Not acceptable. There's a way to do this now. If somebody's fritzed out and whatever else, they're going through a hard time, we'll listen the first time. But if it happens the second time, you're gone. No, because I have to protect these people. Because these are people who are washing people's feet all day long. It's not acceptable. What's not acceptable in your business? For me, for example, writing notes is not acceptable to miss out on that bad boy. That's a personal standard I have. Why? Because I won't stand on stage, look people in the eye and say, you need to write notes. And not write notes myself. Just can't do it. Ray Dalio says this. Principles are the fundamental truths that serve as the foundations for behavior that gets you what you want out of life. What do you want out of life? So those principles are key. So you have your values, you have your principles. Next, what are you willing to fight for? What are you willing to fight for? I'm willing to fight for my clients and I'm willing to fight for my staff. I'm willing to fight for my family. Obviously, that's what I'm willing to fight for. And there's a whole bunch of stuff I'm not willing to fight for. And that's why I've been able to some wise stay out of things that I'm just not an expert in. So what are you willing to fight for? Thomas Jefferson said, in matters of style, swim with the current. In matters of principle, stand like a rock. Here's one. What do you want to be known for? What do you want to stand for? For us generationally, as a family, an extended family. Now my kids, now our staff. What do you want to put your name to? What do you want to put your name to? Just did a remodel inside the building. Freshen it up, make it look cool. If you get a chance to go by sometimes just to make it better for the folks. And if you walk in the door, you'll still see the same stuff. There's old Harry Buffini Ol Harry Buffini. Can you put your name to that? Old Harry Buffini. Smoking stogies, sitting on chairs covered in plastic. Never had a house burned down. That's the first question I have for the Lord when I get to heaven. How did that work? But if you walk in the doors of Buffini and Company, the first thing you'll see, Buffining Company Decorators, Harold's Cross. There's the phone number. They didn't used to have a phone number on it. They used to have an address. You used to have to write a note to Mr. Buffini to have him come and give you an estimate for the job. He finally broke down and put a number on us. Can you put your name to it? Every staff person, Every person walks into Buffini Company every morning. They see the sign of Buffining Company. They see our mission, they see our core values. And then they see that. Can you put your name to it? You see the remodel? We decorated and lighted this up and did this and did that and whatever else, but the sign made it. The sign's from 1942. Because principles don't change, the tactics do. You're going to hear that. Because all these things align form into a sense of purpose. So then we switch gears to your motivation here, right? So you have your what you value, you have your principles, and then you have your motivation. All great stuff. So I don't want you to think it's bad. I just want you to know if you don't manage it, it burns you out. Right? Motivation is the psychological and emotional factors that inspire an individual's actions towards a goal. How many of you deal with some team members that are not that motivated? Can I see your hands now? Here's a tip. You need to know, you people like you don't grow on trees. You need to know you're not recruiting people who are just like you. It's very rare. You need to know that you're bringing people into your business who are motivated differently in different ways and methodology and velocity than you, because you're the leader. But you have to find people's motivation for me, right? At our orientation, right? In our interviews, we send people our client stories. You know, let me give you this. Where's my man Sabor? Where are you, buddy? I saw you somewhere. Where is he? Okay, so I'll just tell you. So after all these times backstage while they were showing Sabor stories, there were 15 of my staff all sitting around a computer because they had a camera unbeknownst to anyone on Sabor. And as the tears are streaming down your face, my man, the tears are streaming down the face of the people backstage because that's what they do. And they rarely get to see it. None of them, most of them will never be known to anybody in this room. But that's what they're connected to. And you guys stories is what does raise the hair. It does create that value. And all my team are just standing around there like a big flock, just looking because that's what they get up for every morning. That's what they stay late for. That's why they do all the stuff, the extra stuff for you and every single story in this room. So I'm not trying to find Brian Buffini's. God help us, the building would be burned down regularly. I'm trying to find people who are aligned to do that and to do that and to do that and to do that and all the stories that are in this room that are known to our organization, that if we truly, we had one of the staff said, why don't we just show the videos all day long and then send them to lunch? Like, we'll try that. If they'll pay for it. Let's give it a shot. So your motivation and their motivation can be different. But here's what you want. Your intrinsic sources of drive to be aligned. You want people who are going to love serving your clients the way you do. Now, I'm going to walk you through this pretty quickly. And it's the internal, external sources of motivation, okay? So I'm going to go through this. I'm going to go all the way to the end. You guys will whip it through. So here it is. First and foremost, a soulful purpose. An internal motivation is a soulful purpose. Like, hey, man, I do that for free on my desk. If you ever tour Buffini and Company behind my desk, this is what you'll see. You'll see my desk. Obviously mama's there, the house fire is there. And then you'll see this quote and it says, the glory of God is the human person fully alive. That's a big time purpose for me. Fully alive. Being here with you makes me feel fully alive. Seeing those stories makes me feel fully alive. Hearing of your struggles you've overcome makes me fully alive. Spending time with the staff and coaches at Buffco, hanging out with you guys, doing the meet and greets. Fully alive. What's that soulful purpose for you and your business? Is it the single mom that came to work for you that the husband left her high and dry and next thing you know, she gets in that she worked for you. You know, I know you have dozens of these stories and she came to work for you. You were the reason that her whole life changed. This is the client that you served. They were in a tough situation. You made it happen. You all have how many stories like that? How many of you have changed people's lives? Who are your customers? Could I see your hands? How many of you have changed people's lives? Who've worked for you? Could I see your hands? Look at this. It's freaking awesome deal. It's unbelievable. That's what's assembled in this room. That's why there's so much power here. Here's the key. When things get tough and markets get hot and we have to readjust, make sure you get back first and foremost to your soulful purpose. I'll say this. I have. I have. And I'm a man reborn. I. I'm more dangerous than ever. You know, I started this business when I was 28 years of age and I was full of vim and vinegar. Now I don't have nearly as much vinegar and the vim is a little low. But I have a lot more experience, a lot more skill and a lot more understanding. And I've learned how to build a bigger team that can do a lot more than me. Individually external responsibilities. So you have your soul for purpose, but that external. You have responsibilities. You know, I hate the phrase but it's the bumper sticker, right? I o o I o. So off to work I go. Those are external. It's an external source of drive. Now there's people who train for years yet. Best way to do is keep putting yourself in debt. And again there's a short term, maybe that that works for you. But you just can't be living with negative external drives. Does that make sense? But you have responsibilities. Next, your internal drive. A desire to be great. Why don't you just admit it to yourself? Why don't you admit it? Why don't you have the actual courage to speak it out and to say what's true? There is not a person who got on a freakin airplane who signed up for coaching who didn't have a desire to be great. You just sometimes haven't had that honest conversation with yourself. No, I want to be better. I want to improve. I want to make more money. But in your heart of hearts, you know it. You know you got an extra measure. You know you've been blessed disproportionately. You know you have the goods in in your heart you know you have the goods. You know it about yourself. You have to admit it. I have a desire to be great. I'm willing to Be called out. I'm willing to be considered odd by my family members. They already think you're weird. My community, my customers, my staff. Now, not my ego. But in your heart of hearts, remember I said just being myself is good enough to be what? You have a desire to be great. There's no way you're here without it. There's no way you've done all these things without it. You have that desire. Give in to that desire and do it the right way. Not in a worldly way, in the authentic way you were designed to do it. Martin Luther King said it this Everybody can be great because anybody can serve. You don't have to have a college degree to serve. You don't have to make your subject and verb agree to serve. You only need a heart full of grace and a soul generated by love. Oof. Wise man. What's the external? You want to stand out amongst the crowd. Now, sometimes that comes in an artificial way, but like, let's say this. That desire to be great, that soulful purpose, you wrap those two things together and here's the way it is. You want to stand out amongst the crowd, tell your client stories. There's a great example. Everybody. Self promotion. Self promotion. Self promotion. Why don't you promote your clients? Why don't you promote their stories? You know the people you've changed their lives. Promote that story. The team member who came to work for you. Promote that story in the appropriate, gracious way. Internal. External. Match up together. Maxwell said it this way. Leadership is the readiness to stand out in the crowd. I was in Argentina this year. We had a great couple of days together. It was a fascinating experience, just hanging out. We had a lot of time on our hands. He's written 95 books on leadership. It was an interesting day. Internal. The wounds that you carry. The wounds that you carry. They say don't trust anybody without scars. I must be very trustable. It's okay. It's part of what makes you great. It's what gives you empathy in leadership. Now, it can't be empathy without accountability. You can't feel so much for the people you lead. You can't feel so much for the client. I feel so much for the client. I'm going to do it for free. I feel so much for my staff person. I'm going to give them their 17th chance. That's not loving people. That's not having empathy. That's people pleasing. Great quote here from a poet of all things. Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls, the most massive characters. Are seared with scars. Anybody here got any scars? Only five of you. Anybody here got some scars? Anybody here been through some hard things? It just seems to be that it expands our heart and it grows us. It makes us more useful, it makes us more valuable without the suffering, without the difficulty, without the pain. Externally, how does it show up? A desire to help. Desire to help. These are your intrinsic sources of drive. Oscar Wilde, another great author Irishman, said this. The smallest act of kindness is worth more than the grandest of intentions. The road to hell is paved with what? And this is why we get back to doing. Doing is a big deal. This is how we go about it. We find out these motivations. And then lastly, you have your effort. It's in your motivation. How many of you put a lot of effort in? Can I see your hands? One of the images, the image at the beginning of the Great Depression was the woman like this with the two kids. The image coming out of the Great Depression was this. It was actually an Irishman, as all great Americans are. That was the image that said, hey, this terrible thing has happened. We've been sideswiped, we've been waylaid, we've been whatever else. Let's get back to work. I'm going to say the same about pre Covid real estate and post Covid real estate. It's time to get back to work. Let's get back to this normal market we have where normal skills and normal practitioners and high value of what we do, high skill requirements of what we do, where all of a sudden the consumer's going, not, I'm going to sue you because you did nothing and made too much money. By the way, the people who sued real estate were the people who made a bunch of money in their equity. It was sellers who sued real estate, sellers whose equity had tripled. But my agent did nothing. So the envy and the greed was, we'll get after you. And as always, an attorney willing to take that case. That's the people. Now we have a different scene. Now we have people who need us the most. They need our skill, they need our motivation. They need our heart. They need everything. What they need is excellence. And excellence is never an accident. It's always a result of high intention, sincere effort and intelligent execution. So we've got to apply the effort in this motivation. Lastly, it's the price you pay. It's the price you pay. Love this one. The only place where success comes before work is in the dictionary. Good old V. Dal. Now let's talk about being at your Best. How many of you want to be at your best? Let me see your hands. Nice and high. Come on, let me see you. Let me hear it. Say the word best. One, two, three. I want to be at my best. Abraham Lincoln said, give me six hours to chop down a tree. I'll spend the first four sharpening the axe. When we're doing the effort thing, we spend six hours banging on the tree. What I love about you guys is we're going to spend two days here sharpening the axe. Is that true? That's why you are the best. So how do we go about being. What's the word? At our best? First, elevate your associations. My mother used to say, the Lord have mercy on her. Show me your friends, I'll tell you who you are. I hated that one. Why did I hate it? Because it was true. God bless Therese. Next. Create a new vision for yourself. A new vision for yourself of what look, being at your best and doing your best looks like. What does that picture in your mind? You know, this hotel was built because somebody had. There was a piece of ground here. This used to be pretty rough stuff down here. Someone had a vision for it, and they built the Hilton Bayfront right here. They had a vision for it. They had a picture in their mind that then they and their team created. What's the picture in your mind that you have for yourself, where you're doing your best and being at your best? What's that picture look like? So first you got to elevate the associations, create a new vision for yourself, and then here it is. Recommit to daily disciplines. Recommit to daily disciplines. Next. Who do you admire? Who do you admire? What do you admire about them? What are they doing differently than you? Who do you admire? What do you admire about them? What are they doing differently than you? The great Jim Rome. We started this session off with a video from him. You're the average of the 10 people you spend most of your time with. Okay, so who's the associations who you spend your time with? Are there people you need to broaden your circle with? Here's the deal. I made a conscious decision earlier this year. I'm so busy all the time. Whatever else, I have this who's who of relationships. Like all the people who've spoken at the events, a lot of them follow up with me, I follow up with them. But I will tell you, over the last couple years and the craziness of the market, I just haven't been in close contact. So I made a Commitment. Come to Jeanette. Jeanette. Get this on my schedule in the midst of craziness. So at least twice a week, I have a Zoom call with someone who's a super person who's come and built a relationship with over the years. And it's like, hey, I'm going to reconnect. And the wildest things have happened. Remember John O'? Leary, by the way, John O' Leary's got a movie coming out October 10th about his life. Like a big time movie, okay? It's big time Hollywood stuff, okay? Big time actors, big time directors, the whole thing. But John o', Leary, I reached out to him and I said, hey, John. And John is a guy who views me as a mentor, and I've helped him in his business. And I'm like, I just want to reach out. And I've been reaching out to all these people, all these people you've exposed to over the years. And I happened to set up a time, and I called John. We had a Zoom call. And it was the day his father was dying, and he was on his patio in St. Louis, and he goes, I would never take a call right now, but I really need to talk to you. And I got a chance to be there for John o' Leary in the most sweet, transparent, beautiful time. He brought me in on Zoom, and his dad kind of squeezed his hand and he said, dad, this the Irish guy I was telling you about. His dad just squeezed his hand. And just by being proactive and being connected and it's been transformational this year. I'm like, hey, I did it out of discipline. Get it on my calendar. And I've had experience after experience after experience this year that's translated into all kinds of kind of neat things and neat relationships and, you know, all kinds of things. I'm going on trips with these folks and that and this and that and the other. And kind of amazing. Bev and I developed some relationships with people that I've known for years. And all of a sudden, because she's like the master of everything, and people have met her and all of a sudden, oh, my gosh, this is the greatest person I ever met. And they want, can we go to dinner? Can we do this? Can we do that? Can you bring the Irish guy so he can pay? So who do you admire? What do you admire about him? Well, what's the possibility of doing some of what they're doing for you? What have you done that would be useful in that arena? What have you done that would be useful in that Arena. And then I want to do this little thing called wave the magic wand. You've heard me do this before. I do it with sellers and buyers all my career. If I was to wave the magic wand, and I just want to know for you, if you were to wave your magic wand and we're going to get a chance to do this, from doing your best to being at your best, what does that look like? What would that look like for you? Do your best, be at your best. The whole thing. Abraham Lincoln said, the best way to predict your future is to create it. So you got to commit into these daily disciplines. You got your physical capacity. You got your emotional capacity. You have your physical capacity. You want emotional capacity. Again, trying to be at your best, and then you reprioritize your schedule accordingly. Here's the thing. You can't do it all if you're trying to do it all. You're not a leader. Okay? If you're trying to do it all, do everything first. You're at the bottom of the totem pole. What are you willing to take off your schedule? Oh, by the way, this year at Buffinian Company, I canceled 13 initiatives. I did things our clients didn't like. I canceled a couple of events. Clients didn't like that very much. I understand. Certainly not something I've ever done in 30 years. But the problem was we were stretched so thin and starting to do things so poorly, it was like, hang on, we need to do this better. So sometimes you got to make those hard decisions as a leader. Would you guys agree? So we cut out projects, things we'd spent millions of dollars on. Boom. We're going to tighten this up. Tighten this up. Tighten this up. We had more consultants than we had staff. Get rid of that. Tighten it up, tighten it up, tighten it up so we can go and be the best in the world at these things. Back to those daily disciplines. Daily disciplines as an individual, daily disciplines as a company. How many of you think if your staff just wrote notes every day, your whole team would do better? Let me see your hands. Great. How can you lead by example? How many of you could write a few more notes? Could I see your hands? I know you're looking for the AI, but once you start there, discipline is the bridge between goals and accomplishment according to the great one. And then lastly, the best is yet to come. Sam.