Podcast Summary: "The Emotionally Healthy Leader"
Podcast: Jabin Chavez Leadership Podcast
Episode: #065
Date: September 24, 2025
Host: Jabin Chavez
Overview
In this solo episode, Jabin Chavez explores the often-overlooked topic of emotional health for leaders, especially those in ministry but also relevant for anyone in leadership or high-responsibility roles. Drawing on biblical examples, personal experience, and practical wisdom, Jabin breaks down the subtle, cumulative pressures faced by leaders and offers a set of reflective questions and actionable practices for maintaining emotional well-being.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. The Subtlety of Leadership Stress: Death by a Thousand Paper Cuts
- Psalm 42–43 as a Framework: Jabin uses the psalms, where the writer expresses discouragement and unanswered questions, as a basis for discussing emotional struggles in leadership.
- "Death by paper cuts" ([01:54]): Leadership challenges are rarely overwhelming catastrophes but more often a buildup of smaller disappointments, transitions, and unmet expectations.
- “The death of the preacher is a death by paper cuts. A little cut here and a little cut there, and before you know it, you bled out—but you don’t even know where it happened.” – Jabin (02:20).
- Even good transitions (e.g., moving into a new building) involve loss and adaptation and can be emotionally taxing.
2. Three Reflection Questions for Emotional Health
a. Who Are You Talking To?
- Leaders must intentionally cultivate relationships where they can be vulnerable.
- Isolation is a choice, no matter your location or context.
- “If you can keep talking, God can keep moving. If you can keep talking, you’re safe.” ([06:30])
- Practical examples: Dealing with discouragement, frustration with staff, struggles at home, or deeper sins—all require someone trustworthy to talk to.
b. What Are You Doing?
- Address areas of procrastination or avoidance. Unaddressed issues drain emotional and mental energy.
- Jabin shares about delaying a necessary but non-dramatic staff change, which took up mental real estate until he confronted it.
- “When you are not confronting things in your life that you know you need to confront, not only are they there doing damage, but they’re eating up emotional and mental space.” ([13:25])
- Encouragement to assess small, nagging items in relationships, routines, or even personal habits.
c. What Are You Doing to Bring Healing and Energy?
- Begin spiritually: prioritize prayer, scripture, and even fasting to rekindle spiritual health and desperation for God.
- “Start spiritual, and then go holistic. Pray first. In the Word first. Prayer and fasting back to a spiritual desperation.” ([15:20])
- Integrate holistic practices: hobbies, physical exercise, counseling, time with loved ones.
- Jabin stresses the importance of finding non-work-related hobbies. For him, music (his past hobby) was too tied to his work; now, he leans on golf and Orange Theory classes as mind-refreshing outlets.
- “Music is too connected to work… I don’t know how to just enjoy the guitar.” ([17:40])
- “For one hour at Orange Theory, I’m not a preacher, not a leader—I’m just a competitor. It gives my mind a break.” ([18:30])
- Advocates for seeking counseling or retreats when needed, and building these habits as regular rhythms, not “once-and-done” events.
3. Accepting the Complexity of Emotions
- Jabin underscores that not all emotional turbulence can be explained or fixed readily.
- “You’re not always going to have answers for why you feel what you feel. I don’t always have answers for why I feel what I feel.” ([23:05])
- Leaders must focus on what they can control: pursuing health, honesty, and practices that renew energy.
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
- On the stealth of burnout:
- “It’s not the big temptations… It’s just a lot of little things. It’s a lot of change. It’s a lot of little cuts. Even good change is change—hello!” ([03:20])
- On choosing connection:
- “Isolation is a choice. Who are you talking to? Who are you processing with? Who are you crying with? Who are you laughing with? You’ve got to keep talking.” ([08:05])
- On the power of facing issues:
- “If the Holy Spirit’s shining a light on something right now… address that in your marriage, address that on your staff.” ([14:00])
- On finding restorative outlets:
- “I make no apologies for [golfing], because I have to keep this thing… my brain, not just my mind, not just my soul, but my body—I’ve got to keep it fresh.” ([20:10])
- On uncertainty and faith in practice:
- “I’ve got to work on health and healing and energy and family and walk with Jesus, because those emotions are coming and going.” ([23:25])
Suggested Action Steps (Implicit/Explicit)
- Reach out: Call or meet with someone trustworthy this week and honestly share how you’re doing.
- Confront an issue: Identify one nagging unaddressed item in your work or personal life to handle proactively.
- Cultivate renewal: Incorporate a non-work-related hobby or practice into your weekly rhythm.
- Maintain spiritual disciplines: Prioritize time in prayer, scripture, fasting, or spiritual retreat to reset your emotional and spiritual baseline.
Timestamps for Key Segments
- Introduction & Psalm 42–43 framework: 00:00–03:10
- “Death by paper cuts” in ministry: 03:10–05:40
- Reflection Question 1 – Who are you talking to?: 05:40–10:40
- Reflection Question 2 – What are you doing?: 10:40–15:10
- Reflection Question 3 – What’s bringing you energy/healing?: 15:10–22:30
- Concluding thoughts & encouragement: 22:30–24:22
Tone & Style
Jabin’s style is conversational, pastoral, and candid—frequently using direct address ("friend"), light humor, and personal examples. He blends biblical reflection with practical leadership takeaways, encouraging openness, self-care, and ongoing spiritual pursuit.
Summary prepared for listeners seeking wisdom on staying emotionally healthy while leading—whether in ministry, business, or life.
