Convincing Hubby We Have Enough

Summary

Podcast Summary: "Convincing Hubby We Have Enough"
Jill on Money with Jill Schlesinger
Release Date: April 22, 2025

In this insightful episode of Jill on Money with Jill Schlesinger, host Jill Schlesinger and co-host Mark delve into the complexities of retirement planning, particularly focusing on the challenges couples face when one partner doubts their financial readiness. The episode, titled "Convincing Hubby We Have Enough," provides listeners with practical advice, emotional support, and expert financial guidance to navigate retirement decisions confidently.

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1. Setting the Tone: Balancing Humor and Seriousness [01:33 – 03:07]

Jill opens the episode by emphasizing the importance of maintaining a sense of humor when dealing with serious financial matters. She believes that a smile can make navigating financial challenges more manageable.

Jill Schlesinger [01:45]: "I don't know, I just feel like everything in life is easier with a little bit of a smile and a laugh."

She and Mark discuss their favorite shows that bring them joy and provide a mental break from the stresses of daily life.

Mark [02:09]: "One of my all-time favorite shows, if I want a good laugh, I'll just pop on some of the old original seasons of Sex and the City."

Jill Schlesinger [02:20]: "Abbott Elementary is just such a great show. It's fun, and I think you guys would like it."

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2. Announcing Upcoming Webinars and Live Shows [03:07 – 03:50]

Jill and Mark announce their upcoming webinar scheduled for early June, teasing a special guest without revealing details to build anticipation. They also promote their Jill on Money Live program, offering listeners access to four webinars over twelve months for $45, which includes access to past audio and video content.

Jill Schlesinger [03:24]: "We're thinking early June. We have our guest in mind. We're not gonna announce it yet. We've gotta lock it down. And it's gonna be great."

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3. Listener Call: DeeDee's Retirement Dilemma [03:50 – 10:50]

The episode's core revolves around a listener named DeeDee from Pennsylvania, seeking advice on convincing her husband, George, that their financial resources are sufficient for retirement.

a. Understanding the Financial Situation [04:09 – 05:40]

Jill begins by gathering details about DeeDee and George's financial status.

Jill Schlesinger [04:28]: "Currently, I'm not working, and my husband currently earns $220K a year, plus bonus."

DeeDee [05:01]: "Pre-tax 401k is $1.23 million. A traditional IRA at $700,000. A Roth IRA at $18,000. A brokerage account with $414,000. We have combined cash of $470,000."

Jill Schlesinger [05:24]: "Oh, you're ready for Armageddon, right?"

They further discuss their assets, including a fully paid-off house worth approximately $750K.

DeeDee [05:45]: "House paid for. Worth about $750."

b. Identifying the Underlying Concerns [06:05 – 09:04]

Despite their substantial savings, George remains hesitant about retiring. Jill and Mark explore possible reasons beyond the apparent financial adequacy.

Jill Schlesinger [06:05]: "Do you guys spend a ton of money?"

Mark [06:16]: "Sometimes people have a hard time adjusting to not having that steady paycheck coming in."

Jill suggests that George's reluctance may stem from emotional or psychological factors rather than financial constraints.

Jill Schlesinger [07:30]: "I think there's something else going on. I think he's nervous about not working. That's what I think."

They discuss strategies to address George's fears, such as phased retirement or adjusting work hours gradually.

Jill Schlesinger [09:04]: "Maybe that's the way to thread the needle. Maybe he does three days a week next year, and then the next year it's two days a week, and then the next year it's done."

c. Recommendations and Advice [09:55 – 10:50]

Jill advises DeeDee to engage in open conversations with George, emphasizing that their financial foundation is strong and that his fears likely stem from emotional hesitations.

Jill Schlesinger [10:02]: "I think it seems to us that you're in great shape. We just have to understand what it is he's afraid of."

She also touches upon Social Security benefits and the importance of timing when deciding to take them.

Jill Schlesinger [10:50]: "If you play it for him and he's like, okay, fine, great. But here's the invitation, George, come back on with us."

DeeDee asks about taking Social Security early, and Jill advises against it unless it can help alleviate George's concerns.

Jill Schlesinger [10:50]: "It's probably not financially the best decision, but if this could get George off the... help him get over the hump, then I'm fine with it."

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4. Concluding Thoughts and Encouragement [10:50 – 12:28]

Jill wraps up the discussion by reinforcing the importance of addressing underlying fears and maintaining open communication within couples facing financial decisions.

Jill Schlesinger [11:19]: "If there's something going on for you and you don't really know how to articulate it, or your partner doesn't know how to articulate it, come on the show with us."

She encourages listeners to reach out for personalized advice and reinforces the show's mission to uncover the real issues behind financial concerns.

Jill Schlesinger [11:50]: "Change your work, change your wealth, change your life. Thanks for listening."

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Key Takeaways:

1. Financial Readiness vs. Emotional Readiness: Even with substantial savings, emotional fears can impede retirement decisions. Couples should address both aspects to make confident choices.

2. Open Communication: Transparent discussions about finances and fears are crucial. Engaging in honest conversations can uncover underlying issues that numbers alone cannot reveal.

3. Flexible Retirement Planning: Gradual retirement or adjusting work hours can help ease the transition and alleviate fears associated with stopping work entirely.

4. Professional Guidance: Seeking advice from financial experts or platforms like Jill on Money can provide clarity and support in navigating complex financial emotions.

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This episode serves as a valuable resource for anyone grappling with retirement decisions, highlighting the importance of balancing financial facts with emotional well-being. Jill and Mark offer compassionate and practical advice, making complex financial topics accessible and relatable.

Transcript

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[Jill Schlesinger]

The Jill on Money Show. It's Tuesday, April 22nd and we are here trying to provide you with a little bit of humor as you approach, yes, a serious matter, your financial life. I don't know, I just feel like everything in life is easier with a little bit of a smile and a laugh. And we know these are serious times. We know that people are really freaked out. We're here for you, we're supporting you, but we're also going to smile when we can smile. And you know, Mark, do you have a little some sort of show that you watch just to make you smile every so often when the news cycle gets you down, you know, like if the Rangers lose, what do you want to watch?

[Mark]

Well, you know, I've said this before on the show I think, but one of my all time favorite shows, if I want a good laugh, I'll just pop on some, some of the old original seasons of Sex in the City.

[Jill Schlesinger]

You are so funny. I love that. You know, we've been watching for our good laugh, just like a little breather and it's sort of like a sweet and sometimes poignant show is Abbott Elementary. I think that is just such a. It's such a great show. It's fun. I think you guys would like it. That's it. That's what my little reprieve that I've. I have. We're all trying ways to escape from everything. And if you guys don't want to necessarily escape, but you want to, like, confront your reality head on, Mark and I are here for you. All you need to do is go to jillonmoney.com, click the contact us button, write us a note, and if you want to join us on the air live, you check the box. We are thinking about our next big guest for the upcoming webinar, which will occur at some point this quarter. Right, Mark? I mean, we do have to deliver one. And it's. We are.

[Mark]

It would be, I'm gonna guess, probably like early June.

[Jill Schlesinger]

Okay, so we're thinking early June. We have our guest in mind. We're not gonna announce it yet. We gotta lock it down. And it's gonna be great. But what are we talking about, gang? We're talking about Jill on Money Live. For $45, you get to join us for four webinars throughout the subsequent 12 months. You also are able to access all of this audio and video content. That's bonus. And our back catalog. So all that is worth 45 bucks for the next 12 months. I think it's a pretty good deal, so you might want to check it out. And we will have more announcements to make about our upcoming guest. Okay. Right now we are talking to DeeDee, who joins us from Pennsylvania. Hello, Deedee. How are you?

[DeeDee]

Oh, good morning, Jill. Thank you. I'm great.

[Jill Schlesinger]

All right, what brings you to us?

[DeeDee]

Well, husband thinks we don't have enough money to retire. I listen to your show daily after hearing your advice to others. I think we do. I'm trying to talk him into retiring. I need your confirmation to do so.

[Jill Schlesinger]

Okay, so we are doing this. Not really for you, deedee. We're doing this for your husband, who. Let's make up a name for him. So give us a name that we'll just call him. We don't want to call him out because he hasn't agreed to come on with us. So make up a name for your husband.

[DeeDee]

Let's call him George.

[Jill Schlesinger]

Okay, Dede, tell us about what you earn right now.

[DeeDee]

Currently, I'm not working, and my husband currently earns 220A year, plus bonus.

[Jill Schlesinger]

Okay, and how old are you guys?

[DeeDee]

I am 57 and he is 67.

[Jill Schlesinger]

Oh, he's gonna. He wants to work forever, I guess. Okay. Do you guys have kids?

[DeeDee]

No kids. Just dogs.

[Jill Schlesinger]

Okay. Yeah. See, Mark, you see what I'm attracting? That. The people who just are dog lovers. This is like the adults with money and dogs. That's what we got. How has George saved in terms of retirement? What's going on for you guys?

[DeeDee]

Pre tax, 401k is 1.23 million.

[Jill Schlesinger]

Okay.

[DeeDee]

A traditional IRA at 700,000.

[Jill Schlesinger]

My goodness.

[DeeDee]

A Roth IRA at 18,000. A brokerage account with 414,000. We have combined cash of 470,000.

[Jill Schlesinger]

Oh, you're ready for Armageddon, right? I don't know what you're ready for, but you're ready for something. Maybe you want to buy something. Okay, 470. I'm with you.

[DeeDee]

All right. And then I have a traditional IRA with 400,000.

[Jill Schlesinger]

Okay.

[DeeDee]

We have no pensions, and that is it.

[Jill Schlesinger]

House.

[DeeDee]

House paid for. Worth about 750.

[Jill Schlesinger]

Gonna stay there in retirement, do you think?

[DeeDee]

Yes.

[Jill Schlesinger]

Any second home desires?

[DeeDee]

No, none.

[Jill Schlesinger]

Why you have all that cash? I'm just. I mean, just out of curiosity, it seems like that was saved for a.

[DeeDee]

Purpose, as I mentioned. My husband just thinks we must need a lot of money to retire. I don't know.

[Jill Schlesinger]

Do you guys spend a ton of money? I don't know. Why, Mark, isn't this terrible? I just, like, out of the blue, thought to myself, they don't sound like they spend a lot of money. I don't know what spending a lot of money sounds like, but I didn't actually sense that in you. Do you know how much you actually spend?

[DeeDee]

Yeah, I did the high side. I figured out about 72,000 a year.

[Mark]

Bye. Bye.

[Jill Schlesinger]

Really giving my notice. Bye, George. What's the Social Security benefit for George?

[DeeDee]

Okay. At age 70, he'll get 5,000amonth.

[Jill Schlesinger]

Dedi, why is he so nervous? You know? You have plenty of money.

[DeeDee]

Well, I.

[Jill Schlesinger]

What's going on with you?

[DeeDee]

He just doesn't think we do and just can't talk them into pulling the plug.

[Jill Schlesinger]

It seems like there's something else going on. I don't mean to. I mean, I. I'm not a shrink, but let's be clear. Let's just pretend you said, well, we don't spend 72,000. Like, maybe let's make it a bigger number just for fun, right? Let's say it's 100,000. Let's just do that. Well, no matter what, his Social Security is going to cover about half of $100,000. You have a whole bunch of money in retirement accounts, some of which you're going to have to take out anyway in those traditional accounts. Right. Forget about, like, you have enough money to retire. You're like, you're never going to spend all your money. So I think there is something else going on. I think he's nervous about not working. That's what I think. What do you think, Mark? Doesn't it seem like, is there something else happening here?

[Mark]

Yeah. I mean, you know, sometimes people have a hard time adjusting to, you know, not having that steady paycheck coming in, but I mean, they have more than enough assets to call it quits and live the life that they're living.

[Jill Schlesinger]

Absolutely. I mean, even if he said, let's say it makes him nervous not to have a paycheck, okay, so he's already 67. He's already at his full retirement age. Let's just say for fun, he says, do you know what his 60, his Social Security benefit would be right this second?

[DeeDee]

No, that I don't have.

[Jill Schlesinger]

All right, let's just say it's like, you know, for 4200 or something. Let's say that you just said, oh, let's take our Social Security early, and let's just pretend it's next year you retired. Okay, so now we have $4200 a month pre tax, and then we're going to just pull a chunk of money out of the $1.23 million. We're going to have to start getting money out of this account, and you're going to take some money out and you're going to pay tax on it. And you're going to say, hey, George, we actually. We're pulling money out. We're getting paid the same amount of money you were making, and we're doing a smart thing. We're getting the money out at a tax level that is reasonable. I think probably the best bet would be if you actually play this for him and you hear what he has to say, something else is going to surface. That's what I think is going to happen. Has he been in the same job for a long time?

[DeeDee]

Yeah, he's been at the Same company for 30 years.

[Jill Schlesinger]

This is deeper. Could he be a consultant at that company?

[DeeDee]

I was thinking that as a suggestion, you know, do, like, even to say.

[Jill Schlesinger]

To the guys, right? Like, just say to the. The owner, like, I love it here so much and I really want to do whatever I can. And, like, it's like a smoother transition then you're not. It's not 100% or 0%. Maybe that's the way to thread the needle. And then, like, for example, here we are, it's 20, 25, and he has this conversation. He says, by the end of the year, I want to, you know, go work three days instead of five days a week. And then maybe he does three days a week next year, and then the next year it's two days a week, and then the next year it's done. Maybe that's the way to try if he. If they're amenable to it. Usually in a business where someone's been so loyal, I think it's often the case where they're like, great, stick around, and we don't have to pay you so much. When you said 72 grand a year, did you for yourself meant include you need health insurance? You would need health insurance.

[DeeDee]

Yeah, I budgeted about. When I looked online, it would be about 6 to 800 a year. I mean, a month. And I did budget that in.

[Jill Schlesinger]

Okay. I mean, really, you're in great shape. I don't know how to. How to do it any other way, but I think it seems to us that you're in great shape. We just have to understand what it is he's afraid of. Because it's not a money thing. Absolutely not. There's no way. Because you're good. You guys are great. Maybe you should bring him back on with us. Listen, if you play it for him and he's like, okay, fine, great. But here's the invitation, George, come back on with Deedi, and we'll walk you through some of the math, and then you'll tell us what's really going on, because it's really probably just a fear. Dee Dee, you got your estate docs done?

[DeeDee]

Yes, we actually did those completed a couple months ago. But I do have a question for you regarding myself.

[Jill Schlesinger]

Sure.

[DeeDee]

Should I take Social Security at 62?

[Jill Schlesinger]

I mean, look, it's probably not financially the best decision, but if this could get George off the. You know, help him get over the hump, and you say to him, well, you collect your Social Security at 67. In five years, I'll collect mine. That's a good chunk of money. Like, if that's helpful for him just to have that cash flow and it'll help him make the decision, then I'm fine. I'm fine with it. But otherwise, I would say wait till your full retirement age.

[DeeDee]

Okay?

[Jill Schlesinger]

Okay.

[DeeDee]

All right.

[Jill Schlesinger]

All right. DeeDee from PA thank you so much for joining us. If you've got a question if your spouse is hemming and hawing about making a big decision. I recently just adjudicated a funny conversation between some family members talking about a car purchase, and I was like, you are not getting that car. You're going to get that car. You know, Mark, I chose the very reliable one, not the fancy one. So I like to be the arbiter of those kinds of conversations. And Mark and I are very well versed in hearing what you're saying, but also scratching beneath the surface to find out what's really going on. So if there's something going on for you and you don't really know how to articulate it, or your partner doesn't know how to articulate it, come on the show with us. Go to jillonmoney.com click the contact us button. Let us know if you want to come on the air by checking the box and we'd love to have you. You can subscribe to us on the Odysee app or wherever you find your favorite podcasts. Try to do something nice for someone else today. Change your work, Change your wealth, change your life. Thanks for listening. We'll talk to you tomorrow.

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