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A
This is the Jocko Underground podcast number 165, sitting here with Echo Charles preparing to answer questions from the troopers of planet Earth.
B
Sure. So we ready?
A
Yeah, we're ready. Gonna present some courses of action, some thoughts, and then we'll move forward.
B
Yeah. See how we can move forward. Good. Agree. Okay, first question. Hi Jockey. I write to you to ask for advice on behalf of my girlfriend. She's one of the most squared away and hard working people I know. Wakes up early, works out, goes to the lab, works all day. She's in the last phase of her PhD program where, where her advisor, the person who runs the whole lab, is making life difficult. For starters, he's rarely in the lab. From what I can tell, he keeps students in the dark about their future. For example, he hasn't reviewed the papers that my girlfriend submitted over a year ago. There is a minimum, there is minimal communication. He'll meet with students occasionally where he yells at them for not having, for not achieving the results he expected. All of that would be tolerable except for he keeps pushing back her graduation every single semester. Everyone, everyone who has recently graduated from the lab has left on bad terms with this advisor. What can she do in this situation? Should she just keep at it and hope for the best? She's even ready to jump ship to another PhD program. But that will undo a lot of effort she has put in. Thanks for everything.
A
Well, I'll start off by saying I don't really know a lot about PhD programs and how they work other than hearing stories from people that I know that are doctors of some kind.
B
Sure.
A
And you know, there's different kind of. But they do mention labs. So I'm imagining it's not like a PhD in literature or something like that. This sounds like some kind of a science based. Right. At a minimum, going to a lab. So. But I don't know much about those programs. I didn't get any degree past my just regular degree in English, which wasn't science anyway. So you're talking an area that I don't have a lot of expertise and I certainly don't know the specifics of the program that she's involved in. So I'm just going to look at this from sort of a, a leadership and a human interaction perspective. And I think what I would do if I were her is I would kind of start to document what is happening and I would, I would gather documentation that has already taken place. Right. And I would start to document things that are going on. Sending emails, hey, checking in you know, doc, you know, I'm assuming the person that's running the lab is doctor Checking in. Doctor. Doctor Advisor, you know, you know, what's up with this? Can I expect a grade back? And then I would just start to maintain what kind of communication are you getting? And if you're not getting communication that's by the way, that's a form of communication if you're getting blown off. As I make communications, whether I receive things or not back, I would start to not demand, but I would request very specific things be put in writing. You know, I'd be saying like, hey, you know, Dr. Advisor, I would like to know about this. I would. I've got this thing working. I'd like to know what I can expect here. I would start to ask for very specific requirements that then I can hang on to and I can be able to. Where I'm going with this, be able to present some kind of a case. Right. I would probably gather other information from other students as well. Like, you sure you have friends that are there. Maybe you have some friends that graduated. Let's get some documentation from them. And then I would put together like a nice request, an outline of a plan that this advisor approves that to a commitment for how you're gonna finish this program and then hopefully get traction. But if you don't get traction, I would set a meeting with the advisor and I would say, listen, you know, here's where we've been for the last three months, four months, five months, because she. She must have some emails. So you. Maybe it's the last nine months. Here's where what I've been through, here's where I'm at. And unless you can help me resolve this, I'm actually going to go and talk to the professor, not the advisor, but the professor or the department head or something like that, and get this resolved. Because this is unacceptable. It's unacceptable for this. Be cordial and be professional. And. But this is wrong. You know, this is just wrong. So that's what I would do. I would gather evidence. I would build a case. I would eventually request like an outline of what I need to do to get this done in writing. And then if I'm not getting the response that I need, I would present the case first to the advisor and say, hey, because I don't want to blind someone side. I don't want to blindside someone. I would present and say, hey, listen, Echo, here's where I'm at. Here's I've been nine months of correspondence from you. You sent me too many emails back. I've sent you 37 emails. The only thing you sent me back, one email says yes. The other email says, check back with me later, and I did. And you never responded. So that is nine months of me putting forth my maximum effort, and this is what I've gotten back from you. I need to graduate from this program. I need to carry on with my life. If you cannot give me a simple, clear, concise answer on how I can make that happen, I am going to take this information to the professor that is running the course, and I'm going to get this resolved. Now, listen, I'm being a little bit more aggressive than I would be in this conversation, but that's ultimately what you have to do, in my opinion.
B
Yeah. It's interesting how documenting.
A
Yes.
B
Is become so much more persuasive, I guess, for lack of better term, where, you know, especially when you have that, like the dates and the times, you know, like, you ever seen those depositions or whatever? I'm thinking of a movie right now, the Social Network. Ever watched that one? Social Network. So it's about Facebook and stuff, the lawsuits and stuff like that. But like, he'll. They'll go like, through the little court or, sorry, the lawyer, you know, I think it's the deposition maybe, and they'll go like, oh, Wednesday, this. And you said this, you said this, you said. And it kind of like when you're in the moment, it's kind of like it's easy to ignore the email and be like, well, no, like, I didn't ignore all your emails. But it's like when you have it literally written there, it paints this, like, way more clear of a picture, you know, because you're detached from it. You know, you can just kind of see it as a. As a whole. But yeah, it takes a lot of. It take a. Takes a lot more work to do that. But I think in this situation or these types of situations, bro, this is your PhD you're talking about. See what I'm saying? So it's, like, worth it. Yeah.
A
The only other thing to consider here is I don't know what, like. Like I said, I don't know anything about the specifics of this program. If that advisor is some, like, highly politically connected person that you screw them over, they're gonna freaking backlash and it's gonna be. You might have to just sit there and suck it up. Everyone else, other people grad. Sometimes it's like, cool, I'm gonna bear. I'm gonna Grin and bear it for the next. However.
B
Yeah, you're right.
A
You know, like, occasionally, man, occasionally you just gotta play the game. Yeah, you gotta play the game. Sometimes people underestimate that idea.
B
Yeah.
A
But the amount of friction that you can cause by not playing the game and you think it's the right, you think it's the right thing to do and it might be the right thing to do, but I'd wait till you graduate and then put the dude on report. You know what I'm saying? You wanna do the right thing? Cool. Graduate and then go to the professor that's in charge and say, hey, just so you know, 94 emails that I sent in a three month period and I got one response and it was check with me later. And I did and never heard it back from them again. So you got to figure out and you got to weigh the risk versus reward. Like, oh, it's going to take you an extra four months to graduate, but there's no drama and we're getting it done and you can carry on with your life. Cool. You present this person, all of a sudden they have a way of going, oh, you want a program. Cool. And they grade you paper and they fail you on your PC. I'm saying you can set yourself up for a bad scenario. So I don't want that to happen. So that is a little excerpt of what we are doing on the Jocko Underground podcast. So if you want to continue to listen, go to jockounderground.com and subscribe. And we're doing this, we're doing this to mitigate our reliance on external platforms so we are not subject to their control. And we are doing this so that we can support the Jocko podcast, which will remain as is free for all as long as we can keep it that way. But we, but we are doing this so we don't have to be under the control of sponsors. And we're doing it so we can give you more control, more interaction, more direct connections, better communications with us. And to do that, we are, we're building a website right now where we'll be able to utilize to strengthen this legion of troopers that are in the game with us. So thank you. It's Jocko underground.com it costs $8.18 a month. And if you can't afford to support us, we can still support you. Just email assistancecounterground.com and we'll get you taken care of. Until then, we will see you mobilized underground.
Podcast Information:
In this episode of the Jocko Underground podcast, hosts Jocko Willink and Echo Charles delve into the challenging scenario of dealing with gatekeepers—individuals who impede one's progress and success. Drawing from real-life listener queries, the duo provides strategic advice rooted in discipline, leadership, and effective communication.
A listener reaches out with a concerning situation involving his girlfriend's PhD program. Despite her dedication—waking up early, working out, and committing fully to her lab work—her advisor is hindering her progress. Key issues include:
The listener seeks guidance on whether his girlfriend should persevere or consider transferring to another program, fearing it would negate her hard-earned efforts.
Jocko acknowledges his limited expertise in PhD programs but approaches the issue from a leadership and human interaction perspective. His recommended steps include:
Document Everything:
Initiate Clear Communication:
Build a Collective Case:
Escalate When Necessary:
Notable Quote:
"I would gather evidence. I would build a case. I would eventually request like an outline of what I need to do to get this done in writing. And then if I'm not getting the response that I need, I would present the case first to the advisor and say... I am going to take this information to the professor that is running the course, and I'm going to get this resolved."
— Jocko Willink [03:15]
Echo complements Jocko's advice by emphasizing the strategic advantage of thorough documentation:
Persuasive Evidence: Detailed records serve as compelling evidence in any conflict resolution or legal situations, akin to depositions in legal dramas like "The Social Network."
Objective Perspective: Written documentation provides an unbiased view, making it harder for gatekeepers to dismiss grievances or deny their accountability.
Delayed Retaliation: Instead of confronting the advisor aggressively in the moment, it's often wiser to wait until after graduation to report the behavior, thereby minimizing personal risk and professional backlash.
Notable Quote:
"When you have it literally written there, it paints this, like, way more clear of a picture... because you're detached from it. You can just kind of see it as a whole."
— Echo Charles [05:46]
Assertive Communication: Clearly and professionally state your needs and expectations. Avoid passive approaches that allow the gatekeeper to maintain control.
Strategic Patience: Sometimes, enduring temporary setbacks or delays can lead to better long-term outcomes, especially when dealing with politically connected individuals.
Risk Assessment: Weigh the potential consequences of escalating the situation against the benefits. Decide whether the immediate resolution is worth possible future repercussions.
Collective Action: Strength in numbers can amplify individual voices, making it harder for gatekeepers to ignore or dismiss collective grievances.
Professionalism Over Aggression: Maintain a respectful and composed demeanor, even when setting firm boundaries or addressing misconduct.
Jocko Willink and Echo Charles offer a comprehensive approach to tackling gatekeepers who impede one's success. By advocating for meticulous documentation, clear and assertive communication, and strategic escalation, they empower listeners to navigate and overcome institutional and interpersonal barriers. This episode underscores the importance of leadership qualities such as discipline, resilience, and tactical planning in achieving personal and professional goals.
Note: This summary focuses solely on the content-driven segments of the episode, excluding advertisements, introductions, and outros to provide a clear and comprehensive overview for those who haven't listened.