Podcast Summary: "Confessions of a Fake Mole Hunter"

Podcast: Joy with Craig Ferguson
Host: Craig Ferguson
Episode Date: September 9, 2025

Overview

In this lively episode of Joy with Craig Ferguson, Craig records solo from London, England, while in town for a secret comedy project. With travel and work limiting his ability to host guests, he turns to a format reminiscent of his late-night show: answering audience tweets and emails. Throughout, Craig weaves his signature humor into stories about aging, jealousy, moles (both animal and metaphorical), nostalgia for late-night television, thoughts on joy, and much more.

Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Setting the Scene: Craig in London

• [00:00-03:00]
  • Craig explains his London location and the reason for a solo, audience Q&A episode.
  • Jokes about London stereotypes—“chimney sweeps singing Victorian urchins”—and the challenge of time zones and busy schedules.
  • Sets up ongoing interactive episodes: “tweets and emails” in place of traditional interviews.

2. British vs. American Potato Chips

• [04:20-06:30]
  • Craig extols the superiority of British “crisps” over American potato chips:

    “The potato chip game in Britain is far in excess of anything we’ve got in the United States. … The potato chip game in Britain, in London in particular… they’ve left us in the dirt, really, potato chip wise.” [06:02]

3. Doppelgängers and Shrinking With Age

• [07:00-13:00]
  • Responding to a question about looking like Gabriel Byrne, Craig tells a story about meeting Byrne in Hollywood.
  • Observes on shared Celtic features (“there’s a bit of genetic crossover between Ireland and Scotland”) and jokes about sometimes being mistaken for Italian.
  • Insight into aging:

    “I used to be six foot two and about six foot two and a half. And I was measured at my most recent medical and I wasn’t even 6 foot 2. … I think in about 10 years, I’m going to look like a mole.” [12:55]

4. The Fake Mole Hunter Story

• [13:10-19:30]
  • Craig recounts a drunken episode from 35 years ago when he lived in rural Suffolk and fabricated a past as a mole catcher to impress locals—competing for attention in the pub with a real mole catcher in moleskin trousers.

    “I invented a, a life for myself, a pretend life for myself where I was a mole catcher. But I’ve never, I wouldn’t know one mole from another…” [17:42]

  • Reflects on the insecurity and need for acceptance that fueled this lie.

5. Tour Requests, Foodie Adventures, and Stand-Up Life

• [20:00-23:30]
  • Question about touring in Utah leads to discussion of fans always wanting shows nearby, even after he’s just performed there.
  • Anecdotes about finding great Mexican restaurants with his writing partner Joe Bolter, and a love for Thai restaurants globally, highlighting one in Ottawa:

    “Wherever I go in the world, I look for a Thai restaurant, because most times when you go to a Thai restaurant, whenever I’ve gone to a Thai restaurant, it’s Thai people who are working there. … The best one I’ve been to so far is in Ottawa.” [22:47]

6. Would Craig Return to Late Night TV?

• [24:40-26:10]
  • Flatly (but humorously) declines the idea:

    “Would you go back to late night TV if offered the opportunity for a prime slot?... No. I loved doing the Late Night show. I know that many of you did, too … But there was a point where I thought, I don’t know how much more I can do this. And that was about three years before I quit.” [25:09]

  • Admits, tongue-in-cheek, that “a great deal of money” might make him reconsider.

7. On Writing Novels

• [27:13-28:30]
  • He’s started a new novel (a follow-up to Between the Bridge and the River) but laments the difficulty of finding focused time.

    “Writing novels … requires so much, like your whole concentration has to go into it. And I don’t seem to have the time to do that right now, but I will.” [28:20]

  • Quotes mentor Peter Cook:

    “He said whenever people say to me that they're writing a book, he would always say to them, ‘Neither am I.’ Which is kind of where I’m at at the moment.” [28:38]

8. Books and Detectives: Recent Reading

• [28:31-34:10]
  • Praises crime and detective fiction; recommends Denise Mina’s The Good Liar.
  • Enthusiastic about Tim Sullivan’s George Cross detective series:

    “It’s quite controversial because… George Cross is on the autism spectrum, and so… part of the condition makes him an extremely relentless and fabulous detective.” [32:44]

  • Tries to persuade Sullivan to write a “mole catcher” murder mystery.

9. Superhero Skepticism and Moleskin Trousers

• [34:15-36:20]
  • Not a big superhero fan:

    “I don’t really go for superheroes. … Seems like a plot cheat to me. … You can have a superhero, like, he has a special power so that if ever you get stuck writing the story, you go, ‘Oh, he has the magical power of, you know, mole catching.’” [34:21]

  • Expresses opposition to fur and moleskin clothing, noting his own contradictions in owning leather jackets.

10. What Brings Craig Joy?

• [36:21-41:50]
  • Reflects deeply on joy’s sources in his life—primarily his children, echoing wisdom from Peter Lassally:

    “You are only as happy as your least happy child. … I can only really be as happy as my kids.” [38:23]

  • Emphasizes gratitude:

    “I try to experience joy by the manufacturing of gratitude whenever I can. I think gratitude, my friends, is the magic bullet.” [40:20]

  • Finds joy in simple things: sunsets, sunrises, even “the snap of a mole in the trap”—immediately clarifying he’d never harm a mole; laughter ensues.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• [06:02]
  On British crisps:
  “The potato chip game in Britain is far in excess of anything we’ve got in the United States. … They’ve left us in the dirt, really, potato chip wise.”

• [12:55]
  On shrinking:
  “I used to be six foot two… I was measured at my most recent medical and I wasn’t even 6 foot 2. … I think in about ten years, I’m going to look like a mole.”

• [17:42]
  Fake mole hunter confession:
  “I invented a, a life for myself, a pretend life for myself where I was a mole catcher. But I’ve never, I wouldn’t know one mole from another…”

• [25:09]
  On late night TV:
  “No. I loved doing the Late Night show. … But there was a point where I thought, I don’t know how much more I can do this.”

• [32:44]
  On Tim Sullivan’s detective:
  “George, the detective. George Cross is on the autism spectrum… and part of the condition makes him an extremely relentless and fabulous detective.”

• [38:23]
  Parental joy:
  “You are only as happy as your least happy child. … I can only really be as happy as my kids.”

• [40:20]
  On gratitude:
  “I try to experience joy by the manufacturing of gratitude whenever I can. I think gratitude, my friends, is the magic bullet.”

• [41:33]
  Laughter on joy:
  “It’s the trite old things. It’s the sunset. It’s the snap of a mole in the trap. Made myself laugh. I would never. I would never trap a mole.”

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:00-03:00 — Intro from London and format change
• 04:20-06:30 — British crisps vs. American chips
• 07:00-13:00 — Gabriel Byrne lookalike story & aging jokes
• 13:10-19:30 — “Fake Mole Hunter” confession
• 20:00-23:30 — Stand-up touring stories; culinary favorites
• 24:40-26:10 — Would Craig return to late night TV?
• 27:13-28:38 — Writing novels & Peter Cook’s wisdom
• 28:31-34:10 — Favorite books and detectives
• 34:15-36:20 — Superhero skepticism & moleskin trousers
• 36:21-41:50 — What brings Craig joy? Parenting, gratitude, and sunsets

Tone and Language

Craig maintains his signature, self-deprecating humor; the tone is informal, witty, and candid, punctuated by tangents and affectionate ribbing of British and American culture, his younger self, celebrities, and more. The theme of joy runs beneath the jokes, surfacing most powerfully when discussing family, health, and gratitude.

Conclusion

This episode is a warm, laugh-filled, and occasionally reflective solo session. Craig draws on personal anecdotes and a touch of vulnerability, answering listener questions with honesty and wit. The memorable “Fake Mole Hunter” story anchors the show around our silly, very human need for connection and approval—and the wisdom that can come from looking back with perspective and humor.

Listener Takeaway:
Even amidst the chaos and curveballs of life, joy is found in deep gratitude, meaningful relationships, and the simple pleasures—whether that’s a sunset, a well-cooked Thai meal, or even the absurdity of a childhood lie.