Juicebox Podcast: Type 1 Diabetes

Episode #1744 – Life Coach: Getting Older

Host: Scott Benner
Guest: Kerry
Date: January 22, 2026

Overview: Navigating the ‘Empty Nest’ Phase with Diabetes

In this episode, Scott Benner welcomes back Kerry, a longtime listener and previous guest, to dive deep into the personal challenges and transitions that come with getting older—particularly after children leave home for college. While diabetes is a through-line (both Scott and Kerry are living with or closely affected by Type 1), the conversation is a candid and often humorous exploration of identity, purpose, and rediscovering life as middle-aged parents—the “life after kids at home” period.

The episode is not medical advice, but an honest conversation about the emotional and psychological sides of life, parenting, and chronic illness.

Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Setting the Stage – “Empty Nest” and Life Transitions

• Kerry’s only child has just left for college, prompting reflection on next steps in life for her and her husband (“What do I do with myself now?” — 05:12).
• Both Scott and Kerry admit to feeling a little lost or bored; routines have upended, and there’s a “new normal” to define.

2. Kerry’s Background and Family Dynamics

• Diagnosed with Type 1 at age 6; now 44.
• Married to her late brother’s best friend; their relationship started as supportive and evolved into romance in her late teens (08:13).
• The early loss of her brother deeply shaped Kerry and her relationship with her husband and parents (14:01).
• Kerry talks about being “the sick one” as a child and the complex family dynamics of grief (14:05).

3. Parenting a Young Athlete—The Soccer Journey

• Kerry’s son was dedicated to soccer, with her husband as coach, but ultimately stopped playing after hard experiences with nepotistic coaches (“...they just kind of quit speaking to him when he was 16 and 17.” — 25:32).
• The emotional fallout of this, not just for her son but for the entire family, is discussed candidly—including the sense of injustice and struggle with “not being able to fix it.”

Notable Quote:

“It broke him in every way possible. I just... Yeah, I don't know how that will go.” – Kerry (35:02)

4. Identity Crisis and Letting Go

• Both parents reflect on the peculiar agony of building children up only to have them leave (“What a weird job, that you spend your entire life trying to get a person ready to leave you and it's the only thing you don't want to happen.” — 55:55).
• Scott shares emotional stories of his own children leaving home, the tears that flowed, and the long drive home (53:59; 54:03).

Memorable Exchange:

Scott: “I drove three hours and water just ran out of my eyes the whole time. But I never, like, cried. I just was, like, clenched down… my shirt was soaked.” (54:03)
Kerry: “Your body took over. Yeah.” (54:15)

5. Meaning, Fulfillment, and Growing Older

• Both speakers express uncertainty about what “happiness” and “fulfillment” in midlife really look like.
• The conversation meanders through simple pleasures (replacing a plant pot, planning a weekend away) and big existential questions (“I'm going to die one day. It's all going to be over. None of it's going to matter. So what the hell, why not do something great or have a fun time…?” — 93:00).
• Honest confrontation with the reality of aging: “It really does shine a light on the fact that you're in the last third of your life.” — 56:25

6. Finding New Joys and Habits

• Humorous musings on what’s permitted now (“Is it okay to eat once a day at 3pm?”) and how to fill empty time (“We're at that point now... There's nothing to do.” — 52:10).
• Both agree that small steps—like planning short trips, reprioritizing self-care, or scheduling lunches with grown kids—are a healthy way forward.
• They touch on the guilt of brain chemistry in parenting, with Scott explaining adolescent brain development and why young adults listen to peers more than parents (64:06).

Standout Quote:

“Maybe it's time to celebrate all the work you put in, celebrate what he's turned into and try to enjoy the time that you're spending now, waiting to see what's going to happen next.” – Scott (70:27)

Notable Quotes and Moments with Timestamps

• On Coaches & Youth Sports:
  “From your perspective, what did they do wrong? ...the nepotism was a huge problem. You shouldn't coach your own child that long...” — Kerry (26:19)
• On Letting Go:
  “You spend your entire life trying to get a person ready to leave you and it's the only thing you don't want to happen.” — Scott (55:55)
• On Grief after Kids Leave:
  “It's such a cliche, but it's 100% true. Like, your job is to get them ready, but you don't do that for yourself, you know?...It's a great problem to have, but it doesn't make it less sad.” — Kerry (54:50)
• On Midlife Malaise:
  “If you want to eat dinner at 3 o'clock, then eat dinner at 3 o'clock. Who cares, right?” — Scott (57:06)
• On Seeking Advice:
  Scott relays an Uber driver’s direct (and comical) commentary on marriage and the necessity of “getting away from your wife sometimes”—a moment both share with laughter and cultural reflection (81:33–83:10).
• On Parenting Catch-22:
  “Everything about parenting is a catch 22... Gives with one hand, takes with the other one every time.” — Kerry (87:14)
• On Living Boldly:
  “Carpe diem... I think that's what you should be doing. It sounds like you raised a nice kid. You're supporting him... There's no reason that in the time in the middle, you can't be doing something for yourself for sure.” — Scott (93:16)

Segments & Timestamps

| Timestamp | Segment Description | |------------|-------------------------------------------------------------| | 05:10 | Empty nest and new “old people” habits | | 14:01 | Family grief and aftermath of sibling loss | | 25:32 | Youth sports, nepotism, and breaking a child’s spirit | | 35:02 | Emotional weight of sports loss/parenting highs and lows | | 46:53 | The emotional impact of dropping a child at college | | 52:06 | Boredom, new routines, and midlife resets | | 56:25 | Confronting mortality & aging | | 64:06 | Why older kids listen to peers, not parents | | 70:27 | Celebration of parenting’s efforts, letting go | | 83:10 | Uber driver: marital wisdom, life after kids | | 93:00 | Finding meaning after the active parenting is over |

Tone and Feel

The conversation balances emotional vulnerability with plenty of joking and self-deprecation. Scott uses humor to expose the ups and downs of parenting, partnering, and living with diabetes. Kerry is candid and open about sadness, guilt, pride, and the slow process of self-reinvention.

Takeaways and Strategies

• It’s Normal to Grieve After Kids Leave:
  Heartache is expected, even when it’s a “good” problem.

• Celebrate the Work Done:
  Allow yourself moments of pride and rest; not every moment needs to be “productive.”

• Find Small Joys:
  Whether it’s eating dinner early, planning a weekend away, or decorating for Christmas in November, embrace simple pleasures that boost mood.

• It’s Okay to Seek New Purpose:
  Try short-term projects, trips, or new hobbies; even brainstorming goals is a healthy start.

• Lean Into Change—Boldly:
  “Carpe diem”—the only certainty is time will pass, so pursue what happiness you can, when you can.

In Summary

This episode gives listeners a heartfelt, often hilarious look at the shock of the “empty nest,” the slow journey of letting go, and why it’s okay (even necessary) to rechart your emotional maps as you get older—with or without diabetes. Scott and Kerry’s candor provides comfort, camaraderie, and practical optimism for anyone navigating the same path.

End of episode summary.