#1761 Kindness Goes a Long Way

Summary

Juicebox Podcast: Type 1 Diabetes

Episode #1761: Kindness Goes a Long Way
Host: Scott Benner
Guest: Lauren, Assistant Principal and T1D Parent
Date: February 5, 2026

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Episode Overview

This episode is a candid and practical discussion about the challenges and strategies of living with Type 1 diabetes—especially as a parent and advocate in the school setting. Lauren, an assistant principal and mother to a six-year-old son with Type 1, joins Scott to share her journey from diagnosis confusion and overwhelm to confident advocacy, both for her own child and as a resource to her school community. The conversation centers on the power of communication, kindness, and building trust in the delicate dance between parents, educators, and medical realities. “Kindness goes a long way”—not just a cliché, but the underlying principle that can make living with diabetes and ensuring care in schools possible.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Lauren’s Diagnosis Journey

• Lauren shares the initial shock and mystery of her son's diagnosis at age 3.5, with no family history of autoimmune diseases.
• The overwhelming nature of post-diagnosis education—encountering unfamiliar terms (“bolus,” “MDI”) and feeling lost.
• Rapid self-education through social media and, notably, starting with the Juicebox Podcast Pro Tip series.

Quote:
“I turned on probably the first episode in the Pro Tip series, and there were words like bolus and MDI... and I thought, I think this is another language.” – Lauren [05:11]

• Lauren stresses that beginner-focused resources (“Bold Beginnings” and “Defining Diabetes” podcast series) are crucial but often hard to find right away.

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2. Moving Beyond Hospital "Rules"

• Lauren and Scott discuss hospital-provided guidance (e.g., the rigid “15g of carbs/15-minute wait” for lows) and how it feels like an immovable rule at first.
• Realization that diabetes management is not always an "exact science"—and learning to thoughtfully adjust protocols through education and peer support.

“Doctors at the diagnosis level... don’t realize that you go home and now that's a rule in your head.” – Scott [08:24]

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3. Emotional Reality of Managing Care

• The emotional toll of injecting a young child, especially one with ADHD, and the weight of guilt associated with multiple injections.
• The relief and flexibility provided by switching to an insulin pump.

“I felt guilt because he was really emotional about it... once we got on a pump... I was like, oh, now I can do what I want.” – Lauren [16:33]

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4. Navigating School with a T1D Child

• Lauren applies her administrative skills to advocate for her child, starting with staff meetings and educational PowerPoints for teachers and nurses.
• Emphasis on open, ongoing communication and building a trusting, cooperative relationship with school staff.

“Keep advocating, keep educating, keep talking to the people in your child’s school... because they have no idea.” – Lauren [26:53]

• Scott probes the realities: parents must educate school staff, regardless of how many T1D students they’ve had before, because everyone’s overwhelmed and may not prioritize diabetes knowledge.

• The importance of not being “too pushy,” communicating with kindness, and recognizing the workload and humanity of teachers.

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5. The Importance of Approach: Kindness, Tone & Strategy

• Lauren and Scott agree that approach matters—advocating with empathy, patience, and kindness is the most effective way to get needs met.
• Adversarial or aggressive tactics generally backfire, especially when teachers or administrators feel burdened or disrespected.

“If you come in and you’re hateful and ugly, we don’t want to do anything for you.” – Lauren [44:21]

• Practical advice: Start with educational materials, such as a one-page flyer and parent notes; include all adults who interact with your child.

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6. School Policy, 504 Plans, and Handling Noncompliance

• Lauren advises that the 504 plan is a living document—parents should feel empowered to call meetings and update it as needed.
• If staff are non-compliant, Scott suggests using a “catch more flies with honey” strategy but also “pick your battles” and push harder only when necessary.

“After an ask has been made, the person who speaks first loses.” – Scott [68:15]

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7. Child Autonomy & Technology

• Lauren encourages gradual independence, with goals for her son to take over more management by middle school.
• Kids with diabetes sometimes get phones for medical needs; new anti-phone policies in schools require 504 accommodations.
• Text threads between parent, nurse, and teacher are lifesavers for real-time communication.

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8. Tough Moments & Humor

• Lauren shares school anecdotes, from handling difficult parents with security to navigating “everyone wants your money” moments with braces and preschool.
• Scott adds levity with personal rants and negotiation tips, but always returns to the central theme: kindness and contrition open more doors than confrontation or entitlement.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments (with Timestamps)

• “This binder that I got from the hospital is not it. And so I really just started digging in anywhere I could.” – Lauren [07:21]
• “The emotional weight that goes with any kind of a fight like that is a lot.” – Lauren [17:19]
• “You have to convey in hopefully a very kind and understanding way that this is life or death.” – Lauren [27:55]
• “Some people are, is what you’re telling me. And I don’t know which ones are which. So be nice. Is that right?” – Scott [49:07]
• “My office... there was a counter... I stuck a sticker that only I could see that said ‘kind words’ on it. Because... I knew that it would get me so much further.” – Lauren [52:39]
• “Be nice. Just be overly nice. Be overly contrite. Just... always ask, never for permission. Don’t ask for permission.” – Scott [68:14]
• “After an ask has been made, the person who speaks first loses.” – Scott [68:15]

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Timestamps for Major Topics

• Intro & Lauren’s background: [00:15] – [02:59]
• Diagnosis story and search for support: [03:04] – [06:56]
• Podcast as sanity and learning resource: [06:56] – [07:56]
• Hospital rules & early challenges: [08:18] – [09:58]
• Managing emotional burden of care: [16:32] – [18:53]
• School advocacy & prepping staff: [25:32] – [27:28]
• Trusting educators & realities of school: [27:42] – [31:28]
• Communication, kindness, and effective strategy: [41:22] – [44:13]
• Handling noncompliance at school: [41:49] – [46:51]
• Child independence & technology in schools: [57:07] – [59:05]
• Practical negotiation & human behavior: [55:07] – [55:56]
• Humor, stories, and real-life perspective: [65:03] – [68:14]

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Overall Tone and Takeaways

Friendly and conversational, with Scott’s humor and directness complimented by Lauren’s candor and administrative insight. The episode is rich with actionable tips, encouragement to advocate gently but persistently, and a resounding message:

Kindness, calm advocacy, and strategic communication are your best tools—whether managing diabetes at home, advocating in the school system, or simply navigating everyday life with T1D.

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For new or struggling T1D parents:
Start with the “Bold Beginnings” and “Defining Diabetes” podcast series for foundational information, and remember—no matter how overwhelmed you feel, kindness and community will get you much further than fear and confrontation.

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For Further Listening & Resources

• Bold Beginnings Podcast Series
• Defining Diabetes Podcast Series
• Juicebox Podcast Community (Facebook Group)
• Sample 504 Plan Resources
• Touched by Type 1 (touchedbytype1.org)

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Episode highlights the real-life, behind-the-scenes realities of T1D parenting and school navigation, with actionable wisdom summed up best by both host and guest: “Kindness goes a long way.”

Transcript

[A]

Friends. We're all back together for the next episode of the Juice Box Podcast. Welcome.

[B]

My name is Lauren and I have a six year old son with Type one and I'm also an assistant principal of an elementary school.

[A]

I am here to tell you about Juice Cruise 2026. We will be departing from Miami on June 21st, 2026 for a seven night trip going to the Caribbean. That's right, we're going to leave Miami and then stop at Coco Cay in the Bahamas. After that it's on to Saint Kitts, Saint Thomas and a beautiful cruise through the Virgin Islands. The first Juice Cruise was awesome. The second one's going to be bigger, better and bolder. This is your opportunity to relax while making lifelong friends who have type 1 diabetes. Expand your community and your knowledge on Juice Cruise 2026. Learn more right now at juiceboxpodcast.com juicecruise at that link. You'll also find photographs from the first cruise. Nothing you hear on the Juice Box Podcast should be considered advice, medical or otherwise. Always consult a physician before making any changes to your healthcare plan or becoming bold with insulin. Foreign. The episode you're about to listen to was Sponsored by Touchedby Type 1. Go check them out right now on Facebook, Instagram and of [e-mail] check out that programs tab when you get to the website to see all the great things that they're doing for people living with type 1 diabetes. Touched by type1.org Today's episode is also sponsored by the Tandem MOBI system, which is powered by Tandem's newest algorithm, Control IQ Technology. Tandem MOBI has a predictive algorithm that helps prevent highs and lows and is now available for ages 2 and up. Learn more and get started today at tandomdiabetes.com Juicebox the podcast is also sponsored today by the Eversense 365. The Eversense 365 has exceptional accuracy over one year and is the most accurate CGM in the low range that you can get. Eversensecgm.com juicebox My name is Lauren and.

[B]

I have a 6 year old son with type 1 and I'm also an assistant principal of an elementary school.

[A]

Lauren, do you have any other children?

[B]

I do. Joel is my Type one kiddo and I have two other kids, one older, he's ten and then Joel's six and then their little sister is four.

[A]

Okay, Joel's had Type one for how long?

[B]

Three years.

[A]

Three years? He was how old when he was diagnosed? Three.

[B]

He was three And a half. Yep.

[A]

Okay. Is there any other autoimmune in your family? None.

[B]

So I've kind of tried to dig in a little bit as far as I can, and I can't fight any other autoimmune, any other type 1? Nothing of that nature at all.

[A]

You've been asking family members, and they're just like, no, don't.

[B]

Yeah, I really don't know of anyone that has any kind of autoimmune. Sush.

[A]

Okay. What made you dig in with them?

[B]

Well, I've been listening to the podcast since about a week after he was diagnosed and just trying to figure out. I really just. Yeah. Was trying to figure out if there was any history of anything.

[A]

Okay. Does it make you feel any sort of way that you weren't able to find anything?

[B]

I think it just kind of makes it still a mystery. I don't really feel necessarily one way or another about it.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

But no answers.

[A]

Yeah. I tell you, some people are impacted greatly by not being able to figure it out. Some people are like, I don't know. I couldn't. You know, I don't know. And sort of they don't think about it. Again, it's interesting to me.

[B]

Yeah. It doesn't really bother me, I guess.

[A]

Yeah. You found the podcast right after Diagnosis.

[B]

Yeah. So when he was diagnosed. So I'm an assistant principal and my husband has a master's in business and works for the Air Force and contracting. And so we left the hospital very much feeling like, there's gotta be more to this than what they're telling us. Like, we have to know. Yeah.

[A]

Right away you thought it.

[B]

Yeah, right away. I felt like by the time we went home from the hospital, we were only there for three days. That I really needed more.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

And so I immediately went to social media, started looking at Facebook groups and things like that. And I came across a post that had the pictures of, like, the Pro Tip series. And so I actually started there very shortly after Diagnosis.

[A]

How did you find the process? Was it okay for you? Should you have found the Bold Beginning series first?

[B]

Like, what, a thousand percent? So I vividly remember a few days after he was diagnosed, and I had just found the podcast. I went to the gym to work out because I just needed a minute. And my husband was still home, too. And I turned on probably the first episode in the Pro Tip series, and there were words like bolus and MDI and probably other things that I can't remember. And I thought, I think this is another language.

[A]

Uh. Oh, I don't understand any of the words. This isn't gonna go well.

[B]

So I was, like, very overwhelmed by that, but still, like, listened to the whole episode, I think, and then went back and started somewhere else just on, like, a random episode, I think.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But I really do think Bold Beginnings and Defining Diabetes are amazing series and hopefully where people will start.

[A]

Oh, I appreciate that. And so you found it just through searching?

[B]

I found it through, like, a comment on somebody's Facebook post in, like, the moms of type 1 diabetics group or something.

[A]

You know, I have to tell you that, uh. How do I say this? I don't really look at all my ats, you know what I mean, when I'm tagged in things, because it would be overwhelming. But recently I just thought, like, why don't I click on one of these once in a while and see what people are saying? And I. Boy, in some posts where people are like, hey, my kid was just diagnosed, I'll tell you, there's gotta be 10 or 15 people, like, in the course of a week that are just like, hey, you should really try this podcast. I don't. You guys out there are awesome. The way you. The way you spread it around. Like, I. That. That's really just my point. Like, I could never have gotten that information to you on my own.

[B]

Sure, absolutely. But honestly, like, it's the thing that made me feel sane after diagnosis of, like, slowly starting to understand what was going on in his body.

[A]

Okay, awesome. Tell me more about that. What was happening? That didn't make sense. And then how did you contextualize it?

[B]

I think the hardest thing for me was things like 15 grams of carbs and wait, 15 minutes of, like, he was on this roller coaster of blood sugar. And just immediately I got this sense when we left the hospital of, like, there's got to be more information. There's gotta be more I can learn. And this binder that I got from the hospital is not it. And so I really just started digging in anywhere I could, started listening to the podcast, started scrolling through Facebook groups and just figuring out what I could. But I knew one of the episodes I listened to, I think pretty immediately was talking about, like, 1515, and, oh, look, a Skittle is one gram of carbs. And, you know, being able to kind of play with that. And my mind was blown.

[A]

Really.

[B]

I was like, yes, this is exactly the information that I wanted to find.

[A]

So just that simple. See, this is the point I try to make, and I don't know if I make it well enough. All the time. But I don't think that doctors at the diagnosis level, like in those first days understand how much what they say sticks exactly how they say it when it sticks. Like, right, like you get low, you take 15 carbs, you wait 15 minutes and you test again. Like, could it be 12 carbs? Like, could it be eight minutes? Like, wait. I understand what they're doing. I really do think it's for safety, and I think I completely understand. But they don't realize that you go home and now that's a rule in your head.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

Yep. And you would never think to break that rule. And then everything starts going upside down and you're looking for fixes and the fix is right in front of you. But in your mind, it's a rule and there's no way you would change it.

[B]

I think it felt after the hospital like this was an exact science that you have to follow. And interestingly enough, this week, Joel's teacher from last year who cared for his diabetes in kindergarten, her 12 year old son was diagnosed with type one. And I'm actually walking through, helping her know more than what the hospital taught her.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

And I see in her head that she thinks that what the hospital told her is black and white, an exact science. And it's interesting to see that from the other side.

[A]

And you probably look like a crackpot to her at first. Probably you're like, on the level of red light therapy, fixes your eyesight. Like, she's probably like, oh, yeah.

[B]

And it's hard to not feel like. I mean, I want to have 72 hours with her and tell her all the things that I know. But also she would just cry like, you can't get all of that information all at once and I look crazy.

[A]

She thinks you're some wacky conspiracist. This lady said 15 carbs. 15 minutes isn't real.

[B]

Right.

[A]

She's going to kill that kid.

[B]

One of the things that her son asked me the other night was like, talking about where to inject his insulin because he's still mdi, obviously in like the first five days. But I had randomly learned somewhere about where you can put your Dexcom and your infusions or whatever, where you can pinch an inch.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

And I was like, oh, I can, like, tell her that advice. Like, if you can pinch an inch on the back of your arm or on the side of your leg, like, that's a great place to inject. And it was just something random that I've picked up along the way.

[A]

Yeah, pinch Up. Right. Like, just the simple thing you hear people say, by the way, again, I don't know, it gets ignored sometimes. But the defining diabetes series is like 60 episodes long, but they're maybe mostly like five, 10 minutes. And it's just basically the, I don't know, the dictionary for diabetes. Because, you know, when somebody says pinch up to you, you don't know what the hell that means, but.

[B]

Right.

[A]

People who do it just say it offhandedly. Like, oh, do you. You know, when you put that on, did you pinch up and you're like, what? Again? You can kind of infer from it, but not everybody does, you know, and that and everything else, like, even just to hear you say, like he said MDI and bolus and I don't know what those words mean.

[B]

Right.

[A]

I just think that's so important. It's another thing that gets ignored at diagnosis. Like, people just start rattling off terminology to you. People do this, by the way, it's not just in medicine. It's in every walk of life. People throw their buzzwords around like they, you know, business people all the time, or, you know, do it. And you hear doctors do it even.

[B]

I mean, how many acronyms are there in education that nobody knows what they mean?

[A]

Oh, sure, yeah. You know, you could. We could pivot this conversation right now. You could start telling me about, like, I don't know, how you support children with special needs in school, and you'll. You're going to start rattling off stuff I've never heard of before, right? Yeah. So the same thing happens here. How long did it take you to find some sort of calm? Like before, you didn't feel panicked anymore? You felt like you might have a handle on things?

[B]

That's a great question. I think relatively quickly I started to feel calmer because I started absorbing more and more information, which made me feel more equipped to handle it. We fought really hard to get him on an insulin pump, and the hospital wanted to wait six months, and we absolutely knew that that is not what we wanted to do. At three injections were not fun. They didn't really get more fun in the two months or easier and before we got a pump. But I think once we got him on his insulin pump, it started to feel more manageable because I could do little corrections and smaller corrections without having to stress and worry about his emotional state while I was doing it.

[A]

I don't mean this the way it's going to sound okay for everybody listening, but is that me, too? Like, did I tell you that or did you figure it out on your own. I'm not saying everything you know is for me. I'm trying to figure out how much were you able to just sit back and say like, you know what I mean? Like, what's the difference between having to live through it to figure it out and having somebody point you in the right direction, I guess is my question. Today's episode is sponsored by a long term CGM that's going to help you to stay on top of your glucose readings. The Eversense 365. I'm talking of course, about the world's first and only CGM that lasts for one year. One year, one CGM. Are you tired of those other CGMs? The ones that give you all those problems that you didn't expect? Knocking them off, false alerts, not lasting as long as they're supposed to? If you're tired of those constant frustrations, use my link eversensecgm.com juicebox to learn more about the Eversense 3 365. Some of you may be able to experience the Eversense 365 for as low as $199 for a full year. At my link you'll find those details and can learn about eligibility. Eversensecgm.com juicebox check it out let's talk about the Tandem Moby insulin pump from today's sponsor, Tandem Diabetes Care. Their newest algorithm, Control IQ Technology, and the new Tandem Mobi pump offer you unique opportunities to have better control. It's the only system with autobolus that helps with missed meals and preventing hyperglycemia, the only system with a dedicated sleep setting and the only system with off or on body wear options. Tandem Moby gives you more discretion, freedom and options for how to manage your diabetes. This is their best algorithm ever and they'd like you to check it [e-mail] Trust Juicebox when you get to my link, you're going to see integrations with Dexcom sensors and a ton of other information that's going to help you learn about Tandem's tiny pump that's big on control. Tandemdiabetes.com juicebox the Tandem mobi system is available for people ages 2 and up who want an automated delivery system to help them sleep better, wake up in range and address high blood sugars with auto bolus.

[B]

Right. I think allowing myself to do corrections before the designated amount of time came from you and that made me want to do that more often to correct and get his Blood sugars more in range. Doing that on MDI felt so much harder, and I felt so much more guilty for giving him more injections.

[A]

Tell me about that. So you figured out, this can't be right. I must need more. But then when you did it, you felt guilt?

[B]

Well, I felt guilt because he was really emotional about it or he would fight me or whatever. And so that just really weighed on me emotionally. And once we got on a pump where he only had a poke every three days, I was like, oh, now I can do what I want.

[A]

So the guilt I thought the guilt was was going against the doctor. The guilt was the what your child was experiencing, having to give them injections.

[B]

Right. I have no guilt for going against the doctor.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

I never have.

[A]

I guess we should talk about that for a half a second more, though.

[B]

Sure.

[A]

Tell people what it feels like. Like, what does it feel like when you're administering an injection? You know, you have to do it. Your child doesn't understand why they're having their reactions. Kind of break that down more granularly for me.

[B]

Yeah. I think. Let me go back for a second. Joel also now is diagnosed with pretty severe adhd. And his emotional regulation skills are, I would say, younger than his age. And so that factors in. Yeah, that. That factors in to how he responded, you know, and it was really hard for him. I mean, he would, like, scream and run circles around the house away from me and having to, like, force him to come sit back down. And I don't feel like with mdi, we ever had to hold him down or anything crazy. We were able to kind of talk him through that. But the emotional weight that goes with any kind of a fight like that is a lot. Like, he just had to get lab. His yearly labs done at the hospital a couple of weeks ago, and it took me, his dad, and a nurse to hold him down so that the other nurse could draw the blood out of his arm. And that, emotionally, is really hard.

[A]

Yeah, no, I've been there. Um, and hard for you. Hard for him. Yeah. Right. Hard on your relationship with your husband, because he wasn't there that day, and you had to live with it, right?

[B]

Sure. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

I think it just adds weight, you know, to an already difficult journey.

[A]

Does it cause you to look at the other kids and think, like, oh, these are easier?

[B]

100%.

[A]

Yeah. That's tough, too, right?

[B]

Yeah. He's also six and needs braces, so it's just hard all the way around.

[A]

He's six and he needs braces.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But his baby teeth are gone, right?

[B]

Most of them, yeah. He is early at that. And so they want to go ahead and put braces on him, which they tried to do yesterday and it didn't work.

[A]

Wait, I'm sorry to ask this, Lauren, which directions are these teeth going in that he needs braces when he's six?

[B]

So basically it's preventative because his bottom teeth on the front are like completely offset. They're not centered how they should be. And there's so much crowding in the teeth that need to come in that if we wait a long time to give him braces, they're going to have to pull a bunch of teeth. But preventatively, they might be able to essentially restructure his mouth.

[A]

Lauren, I'm not a professional in this situation, but it feels like it's possible someone's stealing your money from you.

[B]

So I have been doing a lot of research on the back end.

[A]

Okay. Because my son had a ton of teeth pulled when he got his braces. Yeah, it wasn't great, but, you know, it also just cost what it cost.

[B]

Right, right.

[A]

I don't understand this at all. I have no background in this at all. I want to make sure everybody understands that I could be completely wrong. And I'm not actually even making a pronouncement. I just want to tell you something that I've been telling my wife since I met her. Everyone is trying to take our money. It's our job to keep it.

[B]

Yeah, sure.

[A]

That's all I say. That's for everybody. Not you, Lauren. Everybody. Everyone is trying to take your money from you.

[B]

Okay, listen, once the appointment didn't work yesterday because he had a complete shutdown. I was like, oh, cool. We can try this in like two years.

[A]

Yeah, it's enough. We're good, thanks.

[B]

Great.

[A]

By the way, how much? What are you talking about? 15 grand. What's the cost?

[B]

I don't know, to be honest with you. My husband took him and our insurance pays for part of it for the first set. If he had to have a second set later, we would have to pay out of pocket, I think.

[A]

But I don't know. Oy vey. Lauren, you understand? Not good, not good. Listen, your shoes, your socks, your pants, your house, everybody's trying to take your money. Like, you have to decide who you're going to give it to. All right? Everybody that asks for it can't have it.

[B]

Right?

[A]

Okay. Your six year old needs braces. If somebody would have said that to me, I would have went, oh, you.

[B]

Yeah. I was like, I'm sorry, what did you just say?

[A]

Nice try, prick. You're not getting a boat out of me.

[B]

Yeah, kind of my thoughts too.

[A]

Get the out of here.

[B]

Yeah, so I think we're gonna postpone because I think yesterday was a sign that it's just not worth it right now.

[A]

If that wasn't a sign, take this as a sign. Don't do that.

[B]

Perfect.

[A]

Yeah. Jesus. My God. I. Like I'm already insulted that I went to the grocery store the other day, grabbed seven things and the lady was like 65. And I was like, for what? I was like, I don't understand what just happened now. Now my 6 year old needs braces. What's next? You know, I haven't ranted and raved about this for a while, so I'll only do it briefly. Every one of you who took your little kids to preschool, you ruined it. You understand? It used to be okay if kids were dumb until they were five, right? Like you would just. You let them just bang around the house and then they took him to kindergarten and then some of them figured it out and some of them took longer, but eventually everyone figures it out. You don't know any nine year olds that can't count to ten, right? Like there was no. But then one, one shiny lady with a little too much money took her kid to preschool and taught that little to count when he was 4. And everybody went, oh, no, my kids behind. And now preschool is a giant industry. Your kid doesn't need to know his ABCs when he's 3. And if he does teach, teach it to him yourself now it's an industry. I couldn't afford to send my kid to preschool. It's the whole. By the way, it's the whole reason you got me here, because, because we went to the kid, we made the. He's older now, but we made the baby. Not on purpose. And then we were married, but not on purpose with making the baby. And then we looked around at preschools and it was so goddamn expensive even back then, 27 years ago when we were on 26 years ago, when we were looking, that it was literally cheaper for us for me to quit my job than to pay for preschool. And if one of those people, I say, lady, it could have been a guy, but let's be honest, it was a lady. One of those competitive ladies didn't send their 3 or 4 year old out to learn their ABCs back when they were still pooping in their pants. Then you wouldn't have to listen to this podcast right now. But now you're stuck with me because I didn't have a job. Then I got to write a blog, and now I got to do this. And it's the whole. See? See?

[B]

So maybe I should be thankful for that, lady.

[A]

Or if you don't like me, you should be pretty pissed. So there you go. Anyway, everyone's trying to get your money. It's your job to say no.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, I agree.

[A]

I say no to everything immediately. If you offered me sex right now, I'd go no. And then I'd think backwards from it. Then I go, oh, that was nice of that lady. Maybe we should do that. So everything starts at no, okay? Because I don't want to get tricked into anything because sometimes stuff sounds too good to be true. You know what I mean?

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

May I say I saw something today? It was a gift box to put a gift in at Christmas, but it was billed as, like, an escape room gift box. Now, for the life of me, I don't click on stuff like that, but I was like, what is this? You know, And I clicked on it, and it was $441. And I thought, yeah, see, Lauren, that's how I laugh. When you told me about the braces for the six year old. And so, like. And I looked at that and I thought, so someone bought this or this wouldn't be here. It's a goddamn box. It's a $441 box, and someone bought it. I don't know. All right, I'm done. Learn. Let's move on. So I want to know a little bit about the intersection between your job and the diabetes thing, because it must. You must have a different insight on school for diabetes. I'd really like to hear it.

[B]

Yeah, absolutely. So I think it started when he came to pre K. Speaking of preschool, see, we have a pre K4 program at our school. And so when he was 4, he was able to come to my school. He was staying with a babysitter before that. And even though I was in the building with him, his classroom is right next door to my office. I was still kind of freaking out.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

And the education, I think that is so important to educate people who will have your child in their care all day is so much more than the nursing supervisor is going to give. And so I started before school started. I said, hey, like, can all of his teachers. Can we have a meeting and talk about kind of what to expect? And I, of course, in the way that I am, made a PowerPoint presentation and really just tried to walk through a basic understanding of what diabetes is and how we'll care for it at school. Kind of what I needed from those people. And for me, because of the kind of community that our school is, it was very well received. Like, our nurse was amazing. And I just know that not everybody has that experience as a parent of a Type one kid. But I think my biggest takeaway in this conversation for other people to hear is keep advocating, keep educating, keep talking to the people in your child's school who are going to care for them all day because they have no idea.

[A]

Two thoughts. First of all, what do you mean the way that I am? What does that mean?

[B]

I am very organized, I think, and try to be a really good communicator and even very, like, clear as a leader. And so I feel like I took my assistant principal hat and just kind of tilted it a little bit to now become like, a leader educator of type 1 to those who needed it.

[A]

Okay, now here's the harder question. Because you're involved in education to begin with, why do I have to advocate to somebody who should understand this? Your child's not the first one with Type one to go through that building. Right.

[B]

You're right.

[A]

Okay, tell me the human part of it. What is it you're overcoming?

[B]

I think honestly, it is the amount of information and the amount of plates that teachers have to keep spinning during the day. And unless you educate them and tell them how important it is for this to also be one of the plates that they're split spinning, then they won't. So you have to convey in hopefully a very kind and understanding way that this is life or death, that this is very, very important, and to get the nurse on your side, just all of that. I think everybody has a lot of things going on, and the more that you can help them understand it, trying to find that line of not being too pushy. Right. Will help your child have the best care while they're not with you.

[A]

Try to imagine for a second that there's somebody listening who's had diabetes for 45 years, and they think you're being melodramatic because they didn't grow up with a cgm and they didn't ever. I never knew what my blood sugar was. And like, all of the other stuff that you might hear somebody say, right? Like, explain to them how you feel when you say it's life or death. How is it that you see this whole thing? How is it that your experience has led you to say that out loud, because that's not a, that's not a lightly, that's not a thing anybody says lightly. Right. So.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Tell me about that.

[B]

I don't mean to sound like cliche, but I think when you know better, you do better. And being able to have a CGM and to see his blood sugars, being able to catch a 44 blood sugar drop when he's in the middle of PE class is something that we value, you know, now that we can actually see it. And sure, that comes with extra anxieties and extra layers of protection and making you a little crazy, but in the long run, hopefully it has better outcomes for his health 30, 40, 50 years from now.

[A]

Have you ever really thought to yourself, I can't send my kid here, he could die. And like, and really meant it.

[B]

I thought if I didn't work in his school building, it would be very, very difficult for me to send him to school.

[A]

Because of your fear?

[B]

Because of my fear and because I think I understand how school works from the inside. That there has to be, Say it.

[A]

Say, say what you want to say.

[B]

He can't care for himself. There has to be someone there who can do it for him and is paying attention. And I have the luxury of the nurse and I meeting each other at his classroom door to handle a low.

[A]

Okay, are you stopping yourself from saying, I know these people and I don't trust some of them.

[B]

I, I, if I didn't work there and have a relationship with them and know them on a deeper level. Yeah, for sure.

[A]

So, so you're like, okay, all right, fair enough.

[B]

Because I understand how busy they are, how many buyers they're putting out all day long. How crazy teachers jobs are to have 22 four year olds following them around all day and being the only adult in the room. I can't imagine being in their shoes and having to do this on top of it.

[A]

Yeah, you're, you're talking to a guy that had the school bus driver glucagon trained.

[B]

So like, exactly.

[A]

Yeah, I believe you. I also don't trust people as far as I can throw them, mostly.

[B]

Right.

[A]

It's no shade like, you listening right now. You might be like, hey, I'm a teacher and I, you can trust me. I'm like, yeah, I probably can trust you. I just don't know which one you are. And so I don't know, like, am I getting the school bus driver who's just like retired and looking for something to do during the day and loves kids, or am I Looking for the one who's like, yeah, I got a couple of convictions. This is the only job I could get. Like, I don't know which one is which. Like, am I getting the nice lady who loves kids and just wants everybody to be better? Or am I getting the lady who's, you know, thinking of sending sexy photos to one of her students? I don't know which one I'm getting. And so, like, in that scenario, when a low blood sugar could come out of nowhere, and you need a thoughtful person to understand the process and to put the save into place at the right time for the right reasons. I understand your fear. Like, I live through it. I'm not kidding. Also, I don't think every teacher's, you know, sexting their students. I'm not saying that. Obviously, that's probably not a thing that happens a lot. Although in Florida, it seems to happen more and at the same time. And I know this is wrong to say, but if I was 15 and my teacher was like, hey, I'd have been like, oh, look at me. I'm doing all right. Trying to get at is like, you. It's just the same as going to the doctor. I just found myself three days ago saying to Dr. Beach. Jam was on the podcast, by the way. I don't know if you guys all know that episode 1698. I got Dr. Beach Jam to come on. That was very cool. You might know her from TikTok, Instagram, YouTube, et cetera. She was very cool. She's a pediatric ER doctor. And while I was making that point about doctors, like, you get a doctor, you don't know which one you're getting. Did you get the one who really understands type 1 diabetes, how insulin works? Or did I get the one who's like, I don't really need to know this as much. I don't know who you are when I start with you. So you got to get in there and lay a groundwork, what that feels like. Any dummy could follow this, right?

[B]

Yeah. And that level of trust that you have to try to build with someone who's going to be with your child eight hours a day is hard. And I think the younger they are and the less that they can feel their lows and know what to do to care for themselves, the harder it is.

[A]

Don't lie to me. Have you ever gone into the office in the summertime and said, don't put him with that one, please?

[B]

No yet. But about middle school.

[A]

Not yet. I might not. Susan, I think she does meth like, I mean, listen, in the end, I. I've had, you know, I've. I've gone to school, my kids have gone to school. You know, most of the teachers that I've experienced have been really lovely. Seriously. You know, and just like most of the doctors and nurses I've come across have been absolutely awesome. It's just, you know, I don't know. In that moment, you want to know that the people around you are competent and ready. And that's. I don't think it's a lot to ask, Will say.

[B]

In the two and a half years that he's been in school, I could not have asked for better support from anybody. From the nurse, from his teachers. You know, following his blood sugar and Texting me at 8pm Being like, is he okay?

[A]

And you're like, please stop. Please stop following him at 3:30.

[B]

I. I know. We did set up parameters to turn off their notifications.

[A]

It's so nice. Get a boyfriend. Leave me alone. Find a hobby, get out of here. But I take your point. You didn't think they were being nosy. They really cared. Right?

[B]

Right.

[A]

Yeah. That's awesome. That's cool. How do you think his experience is? Because in the end, the other thing is you don't want his experience to be any more intrusive into regularity than it needs to be.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Is that.

[B]

No, I think it's pretty good. We go into his class once a year, so his diversaries. September 12th. So I try to usually go in, because that's towards the beginning of the year, and do a little lesson for his class. And we paint Joel's omnipods. And so I actually let all the kids decorate their own coloring sheet that's an omnipod. And we do a cool, fun lesson with that. But just trying to help them understand, like, at 4 or 5, 6 years old, what's going on? Why is he getting a juice box when nobody else is? You know? And our kids have been so understanding and so welcoming, and I think we try to interrupt the least amount possible into his class.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

But, yeah, I think it's gone really well so far.

[A]

Good. That's awesome. Yeah. You call that PowerPoint? Why Joel has a phone and you don't? Yeah, I got yelled at when Arden got a phone. Lot of moms on the phone to me, what are you doing? What are you doing? And this is a long time ago. They were like, oh, way to set the bar. I was like, look, I don't want to do. This is it, you know, but here we Are Arden was like rolling around with an iPhone back when people didn't have them. Yeah, because we tried, by the way, tried to get her a little flip. It was just for emergencies. I wanted her to be able to, like to talk about how, like, how scary it can be. There was a 20 minute bus ride at the beginning of the day and the end of the day, and I wanted her to be able to let me know if her blood sugar was low because there was no share, like back then. Like, I couldn't see her blood sugar. And so you basically, you know, she'd text me at the end of the day like, hey, I'm getting on the bus now this is my blood sugar. And then she'd get on the bus and I didn't, I couldn't track it. And so if something went south, we wanted her to be able to reach out. And, you know, we took her to the. I remember this. We went to the cell phone store. I got. I wasn't looking to spend money on this. I'm like, look, here's a flip phone. You open it up, you push these buttons. And she couldn't do it. Whoever designed that UI on an iPhone, you could hand it to a six year old. And they. And she was like, oh, yeah, I can make this work. And I was like, oh, great. So now she's got that. And every mom in town is pissed at me, you know, I was like, whatever. By the way, all your kids have phones now. It's not my fault.

[B]

Well, and I think that's probably worse now because a lot of states are outlawing phones at school.

[A]

Yes.

[B]

Texas just did it. And so now they really are like that kid who gets to have their phone during the school day, you know.

[A]

Pulls it out like you're like, you're George Clooney in his prime. Look at me. The rest of you suckers don't have.

[B]

Your phone because their friends can't have it.

[A]

Yeah, where's your phone, sucker? I got mine right here. So yeah, look at that. I'll say if, if, if nobody else will maybe the greatest thing ever not to let kids have phones at school.

[B]

Oh, I agree.

[A]

If you'd like them to learn something. I mean, if you want them to figure out TikTok, then, I mean, perfect. You know, if you want them to listen, be able to focus, I think maybe don't send them with the crack in their pocket. That might be an easier way for them to, to be able to focus. But. Yeah, but there are plenty of people who have medical devices on their phones now. So you're saying that they said no to the kids, but if you have a medical device, would you get like a special, like, hall pass for that?

[B]

Yeah, you have to write it into their 504 plan or whatever just to cover yourself, but yeah.

[A]

Nice. Well, look at us, finally getting something. Although Disney took away the pass.

[B]

I think I did hear that.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. Also, we can't talk about that. It makes people very upset. Never seen people argue online more than about that. Like, if you want to argue with people online, go to a place where there's people with type 1 diabetes and say, hey, I'm taking my kid to Disney. Is there a way that I don't have to wait in these lines? And then here it comes. We're not disabled. I'm like, I don't. Why can't you just stand in the line? Blah, blah, blah. You're making it bad for all of us. My kid gets low. Oh, my God. They don't stop. Ridiculous. Listen to me now. Keep arguing. I mean, it keeps the group going. So if you want to argue, argue, I guess. What do I care?

[B]

A little entertainment.

[A]

Yeah, it gives me something to do. I mean, as soon as it pops up the, like, I get a message from one of the. One of the moderators, like, hey, we tagged this to pay attention to it because it's T minus show and counting when it comes up in two seconds. That's for all you adults out there, like, hold yourselves together. Okay, what else do I need to know about the. The school? Like, what have you learned going through this process that you didn't know before setting up a 504 plan?

[B]

I think the biggest thing that I would say is not just with type 1, but with any exceptional need that a student has, you have to communicate the parents, I want them to feel comfortable to keep communicating, to go in and meet with the staff whenever you need to. As much as you need to, to help your child be successful during the school day, it doesn't just have to be your once a year meeting. You can call a meeting whenever you need to.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

And so really just trying to help them to know that they can have their needs met and still be successful at school. And I think communicating your child's needs clearly is one of the biggest ways to do that.

[A]

What do I do, though, if the teacher or an administrator or somebody isn't, I don't know, compliant with what's been set out in front of me? You put something reasonable in front of them. It's agreed upon, they don't do it. Now, what I basically have is an employee who doesn't want to be bothered with the extra work that they've given me. And if I push back, don't I make an enemy? An enemy who's in charge of aggrading my son or. You know what I mean? Like, and is there a way. How do you navigate that?

[B]

Honestly, I think it's all about your approach. It's very much about your tone of voice and your body language and the way that you maybe ask for help instead of demanding it in the first place. I'm not saying that that's, you know, gonna fix everything. There's obviously still people who don't want to hear it and people who don't want to help, but hopefully that's the exception.

[A]

Well, there's going to be some people who think your kid, like, has type 1 diabetes because they ate poorly. Right. And that's your fault. Now you want me to do something about it. Blah like that. Right. There's ignorance like that.

[B]

Yeah. And that's why I think, like, I started with the PowerPoint presentation, like, let me in 20 minutes, tell you the most important things about what Type one is and why it's important to care for his blood sugar through the day and kind of try to write some of those misconceptions.

[A]

Yeah, that's a great idea. I mean, and probably again, necessary because you don't know who's going to, you know, hold a bias in their head. Never say it out loud.

[B]

Yeah. The other thing that we do is I make a one pager, and there's one for the staff that I give to all of his teachers and our principal and nurse and everyone that has this most important information on it. And then I also kind of tweak it and make one to go home with all the students in his class that have the signs and symptoms of type 1 and try to educate them too. Because I feel like probably as you do, the more people that we can spread the truth to, the more we write those misconceptions.

[A]

No, it's a good opportunity. Right. You've got. Got a captured audience there of about 30 people that you can maybe, hopefully put a flyer in their hand. Maybe their mom will look at it, their dad will look at it for a second and understand it a little better. Yeah. No, and it might also help the kids not to tease and be, you know, unkind. And, you know, it's a lot. I think there's a lot of good that goes into it. It's probably not that much effort for you either, right? You get a lot out of it. A good bang for your buck, I imagine.

[B]

Yeah. I've actually had a couple of really great conversations with parents of a preschooler or a first grader who said, like, yeah, my son came home talking about his pancreas and mom, what's insulin? And they were able to have, like, a really good conversation about it. And I think the little, like, flyer thing, you know, helped the parent to understand it, to be able to talk to their kid about it.

[A]

So good for you. Look at you out there doing nice things. You said something a minute ago that made me feel like you have had to stand in an office and be yelled at by a parent. You were like, of course I have.

[B]

I'm an assistant principal.

[A]

It's about tone and body language. And I felt like what you were saying is, please don't scream at me and look like you're going to hit me.

[B]

Well, mostly it's like, if you come in and you're hateful and ugly, we don't want to do anything for you.

[A]

Well, yeah, we want you to leave. That's the human part. I. I say, listen, I've been on this a long time, like, catch more flies with honey, you know, that kind of thing. Assume they don't know what you're talking about, that you sound crazy. Don't come in demanding things right away because you do sound crazy. Even when you start explaining diabetes to somebody who doesn't understand it, you sound crazy. So you have to go, just like Lauren's saying, like, education, slow, calm. Once they get a little understanding, move them forward a little bit. It's a bit of an effort, you know, and. And you can say, I shouldn't have to do that all you want, but again, you're dealing with people, and not everybody's got the same level of understanding, compassion, desire, number of things that go into this. You know, I've had moments where, you know, I've gotten pushback, and. And I know if I would have lost my mind there, that it would. It just would have died on the vine. Like, so you just have to stop and go, hey, I see why you think that, but, you know, that's not going to work. And here's why. I have also, you know, over the years, pushed harder on some things. I yelled at one school nurse in high school for contacting Arden's endocrinologist without anybody's permission, as you. Yeah, I was like, that is none of your business. Like, never call my Daughter's doctor again. So I was trying to help, and I was like, I couldn't possibly care less what you were trying to do. Like, don't. That's. You talk to me. That's. That. You know, also, the thing was, like, why they even considered doing it. But. And I've pushed in the past, too. Like, you know, I. We set things up. Those things weren't met. It turned into a dangerous situation. And then I pushed, but I waited until I didn't just yell every time they didn't understand something. Like, one time they messed up a big. A big thing. And I said, okay, like, I've got the high ground now. This is an opportunity for me to move this whole thing forward. They can't fight about it because they had been fighting before because they didn't want to spend money. And this is a long, long time ago. Arden was in kindergarten, and all we really were asking for was, like, maybe an aid to move her around the building a little bit. I know you guys are listening now, and you're like, I got cg. I garden another CG I'm on in kindergarten. Like, you know, there was. We were going to, you know, finger stick a couple of times a day. We were managing the whole thing that way. And so, you know, we just wanted somebody to be there when she was on the playground, just kind of keeping an eye on her and stuff like that. And this was not like a teaching position. It was, you know, I mean, it's an aid. It's. It's not that expensive, and they have budget for that stuff. They didn't want to give it to her. And then they made a mistake one day and put her in a perilous situation. It's the wrong word. It was a dangerous situation. And I used that situation to push back. And then you could see the ignorance, because there I was in the office with the superintendent of this district, and he's like, why can't she just do it herself? And I was like, well, she's five. That's one of the reasons. Do you even understand what you're talking about right now? You want her to do it? And I was like, she can't do all that. She doesn't understand any of it. And, you know, I don't know. I took advantage there. And after that, you know, it was pretty smooth sailing after that, to be perfectly honest.

[B]

Yeah. And I think you have to sometimes get to that point, but the first five, ten minutes of your conversation, especially if you don't know these people that you're going into the school to talk to are everything. The way that you present yourself, the way that you talk about what your child needs, is so important because it doesn't matter who you are. As an educator, people can rub you the wrong way. And as a human, you just then really don't maybe want to go the extra mile for them. And so I think it's important to really come across very caring and empathetic and understanding. Also how busy and crazy their lives are, and then to clearly explain your needs in, you know, a kind and respectful way.

[A]

I think you just said it all a second ago. Honestly, the way I think about it is, you come at somebody the wrong way, they are not going to be inclined to help you. And that's it. Like, you can take all of the way it should be, and we have it written down, and there's a 504 plan. You just throw it all out the window because in the end, you just pissed off somebody who has a power over you. And if they're not incredibly forgiving people, they're gonna exert that power over you now, and it's gonna be at the expense of your kid and their diabetes.

[B]

Exactly.

[A]

So some people are, is what you're telling me. And I don't know which ones are which. So be nice. Is that right?

[B]

Right? Yeah, exactly. So my motto in life, I mean.

[A]

In the end, is that not the rule about everything? You know what I mean? Like, yeah, what are you doing? You know, you have a problem at the cash register, you have a problem at school, you have a problem anywhere, you start with contrite. I'm sorry. Whether you are or not, by the way, I got pulled over a couple weeks ago, is longer than that. Again, I was on my way to the airport to go to touch by type one, and I got pulled over. I don't know. I was going too fast. Guy pulls me over, I pull. I got off the road. He comes to the window. I say, sir, how are you today? He goes, good. I said, was I speeding? And he said, yes. Now, I want you to know, Lauren, I didn't know if I was speeding or not. It just was like, a safe assumption, you know? And I didn't want to be like, why? Why forever? Why is this happening? Like, you know what I mean? Like, I was like. I said, was I speeding? And he goes, yeah. I said, I apologize. I'm on my way to the airport. I understand if you need to give me a ticket. I hope you don't. I said, but if you do I just. I have a flight. I have to make it this time. I'm going to speak at. And I stopped and I said, it's going to sound like I made this up to get out of this. I said, but I'm going to. To give a talk for a charity, and I really can't miss this plane, so whatever you want to do. I said, you know, cars, clean, titles, all this is clean. Here you go. I'm so. I. Again, I'm very sorry. Where was I? Speeding. And he told me, and I said, oh, I did. I didn't realize. I. Again, I'm sorry. He comes back a couple seconds later and he goes, hey, everything's good. You're, you know, everything, insurance, blah, blah, blah. He goes, you know, what's the talk for? And I told him, and he goes, well, get going. I don't want you to miss the plane. I. And I was like, no ticket? And he goes, no. And I was like, oh, thank you. Like, right. That easy. The guy had me, you know what I mean? Like, he had me, and I knew it. Like, I don't start with, what are you doing? Or I'm gonna be late, or like, I just talked to him like a person and he treated me like one in return, sort of the end of it.

[B]

But I wonder how many times they actually get treated like a person when somebody gets pulled over, you know?

[A]

Well, yeah, like if you. If you get pulled over and you start with, I pay your bill, like, I pay your pay, or whatever. Like, I mean, yeah, well, you're about to pay me to write you a tick then, because, like, that's when the human part clicks in. Like, I don't know why people don't understand this. Like, nobody wants to be treated that way. And when people have power, they use it, right?

[B]

Especially when you have a lot of emotions and stress and fear coming into. Like, your kid's just been diagnosed with type one and you're trying to convey all of this, especially if you don't really understand it yet yourself. It's harder to be calm and to be kind and to come in like that, but it'll get you miles further down the road if you can do it.

[A]

Yeah, I just. I couldn't possibly agree more. I think the whole thing is human. I don't want to go down a bizarre path of ularm, but I think everything is power. I think that if you're talking about. It doesn't matter what you're talking about could be politics. It could be talking to your kid's Teacher about their, you know, their diabetes and everything in between. I think everything is a power struggle. I don't know that people do it on purpose, but I don't think I've ever been in one situation that wasn't someone pissing on somebody else's foot. Do you know what I mean? Like, it just. I don't know why people are like that. I don't even care. I just know that's the game. So if I know. If, you know, I know the rules of the game, then I can get to the end. And that's sort of how I feel about it. But I don't say it's right. I just say it. It is what it is.

[B]

When I first started as an assistant principal, my office was like a front office secretary kind of desk situation. So there was a counter, like, right in front of my face, and I stuck a sticker that only I could see that said kind words on it. Because I inherently am kind of an aggressive personality, kind of a loud, boisterous. Can sometimes, you know, speak before I think person. And I really put that there to remind myself to slow down and to take a breath and to be kind, because I knew that it would get me so much further.

[A]

Yeah, it just. It just is. I. I've walked into school, you know, even, like, in high school, like, sometimes, you know, pump failure or something goes wrong in the middle of the day or whatnot. You get a text, and the text is like, hey, could you bring over, like, some insulin or whatever? Because people are like, you should keep that at school. But, like, yeah, we just lived across the street, so. And I, you know, I work out of the house. It's not a big deal. Happens a handful of times. And I go, oh, yeah, yeah, sure. So, you know, grab something, go over to the office. Hi, I'm here to meet my daughter in the, you know, the nurse's office. She's down there changing an insulin pump. And I have the insulin here in the pump, or, you know, the pump we had at school didn't work or whatever right away. There's rules. You real. I mean, and there's. To the average adult who doesn't spend their time in a school, it's a lot of silliness. Sign here. Give me your driver's license. We hold the driver's license while you're in there. I'm like, you know me. I'm like, I've been like, okay. And then if you push back a little bit, if you just go like, this is silly. You realize that the person on the other side is like, oh, no, this is not silly. This is my domain. This is a thing I control. And I know it's at every level of people. People like, no, no, I got the rules on my side now, buddy. You all do it. You know what I mean? Everyone does it. Like, you know, everybody loves to be in power once in a while, and again you start pushing back, and then the next thing you know, nobody's helping your kid. And. And where did it get you? Were you just happy to be right? Like, you just want it to go the way you need it to go? Who cares about the rest of it? I don't honestly care if I'm right or wrong or if they're right or wrong. As long as the thing that needs to happen happens. I couldn't possibly care less. So smile and wave. Eat a big spoonful of. With a smile on your face if you have to. Who could possibly care less? That's how I.

[B]

Right. But at the end of the day, you're getting what you want or what you need, and that's how you get there.

[A]

Exactly. You again. Right? What do you trap more flies with, honey? Is that the saying? That saying's not out of nowhere. They didn't make that up for no reason because people have been shitty forever and they. And people like it is. I don't even mean it. You know what I'm saying, though, Lauren, Right?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. I don't sound crazy to you?

[B]

100 agree.

[A]

This is the world. Like, play by the rules. The world's. Don't tell me how it should be. Just. I don't have time for that. I can't fix mankind and humanity and how people feel. And, you know, that power feels nice and that, you know, you're. You don't. You don't have control at home, so you have it at work or whatever your thing is. Like, I couldn't possibly care less. I'm just trying to get out of here with the thing I need, so.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Yeah. I don't care. Well, look at us making a lot of sense here. This is awesome. That. That little kid of yours.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

What are your expectations for him managing himself? Like, what's your timeline? Or are you just gonna go in with the flow? How are you thinking about that?

[B]

Yeah, I am taking a lot of leads from him. I think he reads the carbs on anything that has a label now, and he really wants to tell me the carbs. And so that's really cute that he, you know, he's taking ownership of that. And I think that's one of the first things that he can take ownership of. He chooses which pod he wants because they're all painted differently. So, like, he goes and gets the basketball one or the Superman one or whatever. And I think that will turn into, you know, more independence very slowly as we go down the road. My goal being that by the time he goes to middle school, he's fully independent of his care without the nurse needing to do things for him during the day.

[A]

So do you guys text during the day about diabetes stuff?

[B]

Yeah. So the. I have two text groups and I will say I'm sorry if your school's staff is not open to this. I think they should be. But I have a chat that's the teacher, the nurse, my husband and myself. And then I have a separate chat that is only the nurse, my husband and myself because we still very much help the nurse decide how many grams of sugar. Like, are we doing five skittles? Are we doing a juice box to correct his low and things like that and help make those decisions throughout the day. And those text threads are lifesavers. And then we only include the teacher when we have to because we don't want to interrupt her as much as possible.

[A]

That's awesome. And again, everybody texts at this point. Like, it couldn't possibly be more natural to do it that way, I would imagine.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, it's been very successful.

[A]

Yeah. Even you know, now versus 10 years ago. Like, if you ask somebody to do that 10 years ago, they'd be like, I don't, I don't want to be looking. Everyone's got their phone, it's glued to their face. I like, that's a. That's really awesome.

[B]

But my, my friend, the kindergarten teacher whose son just got diagnosed, she went to the middle school that he attends and she was like, oh yeah, I have three other type ones. They pretty much self manage. They come in here if they need anything. She was not open to following his blood sugar on anything. She said, you can email me if you want to contact me. And I about lost my mind. I was like, can you just bring it back here? We have sixth grade at our school. And I was like, no, no, no, no, no. Bring. Bring him back here where we can help him and teach him for a year and then he can go to middle school.

[A]

You can email me is a loose translation of I don't care.

[B]

And that's crazy.

[A]

Well, no, because I ran into this too. Like, oh, you know, I started asking for things like testing at Certain times, stuff like that. And I got told there are other type ones in this building and there's other type ones that have been through this building. And none of them had to do that. And I was like, I know a couple of them and their blood sugars are in the 200s. I was like, if that's how they want to live, I. God bless. Like, I don't care. I said, but that's not. That's not what we're here for. I think the argument that got me past that with them is I said, what is the point of me sending my daughter here every day for 12 years, keeping in mind that she was diagnosed when she was 2, right? Like, every day for 12 years. If at the end of those 12 years she has complications and horrible health but a good education, what's she going to do with that education when her health is failing? Like, explain to me why I shouldn't just move to an island, sit on a beach and enjoy our lives. You understand what you're here for, right? Like, you're here to educate her so that she can go live a life. And if in trade for that education she gets terrible health, then what was the point of all this? And somebody in the room was like, oh, okay. I was like, yeah, like, right. Like, so you get it. Like, she doesn't just wander around here with a 200 blood sugar all day. She doesn't wander around here with a 250 blood sugar all day. Her blood sugar doesn't spike to 300. And we just go, like, cost of doing business. Like, that's not what we do. Her outcomes are what's important day to day, week to week, hour to hour. Outcomes, outcomes, outcomes. Like, we want blood sugars to sit stable, and we're going to work towards that because otherwise, what is this all here for?

[B]

Right?

[A]

I had a conversation. This might sound disjointed, but I was listening to a conversation I had with somebody during an edit, and he was talking about how he has type 2 diabetes and he wanted to get his health in order to be around for his children. But what I realized was that there was no extension of the understanding that my father had problems. I have problems. I. I want to be around for my kids. But what I didn't hear was, also, I bet you my kids are going to have these problems, too. It's hard to plan for that kind of thing. Like, the human mind does not want to believe that something's going wrong that we're going to just see in the beginning. That's not how we. I don't know, our brains just don't seem to work that way. Because my point is that I thought during that conversation that guy was going to say, and I should be looking into this medication for my kids because obviously it's happened to me, it happened to my dad, and it's probably going to happen to them. But his mind didn't go there and it just. I don't know, it gave me a pause for a second, and I think this was the same thing. You're going to let my kid walk around with, like, a blood sugar that's three times normal and tell me that at least she's not having a seizure and so we're good and that's it, huh? I was like, huh, what a lack of understanding about what being alive is about. Like, you're, you know, you're impacting her now detrimentally and in the future, detrimentally, but she's not passing out, so we're all good.

[B]

It's like, wow, when you look at her, she looks fine.

[A]

Yeah, she's not. If her blood sugar is 260, which I made that point to them, they're like, well, you know, the doctor said from, you know, this to this. And I was like, yeah, you know, your blood sugar is 85 right now. I was like, so you want hers to be 250 before we do something? You know, 250 is like. It's like 180 points higher than average. Right. And that's a lot. Doesn't that sound like triple to you? And now these people have been told they understand what high blood sugar is, and they still don't. Nobody cares. Like, I'm just. I'm just telling you, you know, when your kids come to you at some point, they're like, people are looking at me like, you know, like. Or they feel uncomfortable. Like the. The time I was able to get through to my son. No one cares. Like, no one's looking. No one cares. You're like, everyone's paying attention to themselves and they're paying attention maybe to their families if they're lucky. I was like, but nobody's looking at you. By that same extension, no one is putting their resources, their compute cycles into making sure someone else's kid doesn't have a medical condition 20 years from now. That's your job as the parent and nobody else's. And so if you can get somebody to comply and help, good for you. But if not, don't expect them to do it for you.

[B]

Absolutely.

[A]

Why am I such a bad mood today. Lauren, you're such a lovely person. Pissed me off.

[B]

But everything you're saying is true, right?

[A]

I'm a genius. But that's not the point. I see the world. I'm like an oracle. I'm almost an idiot. Lauren, I just. There's some things I'm just sure about and this is one of them. Like, I love. I have a lot of great friends, a lot of great people. If we all crash landed on an island, every one of them would cut my throat. So like, I just. You gotta, you gotta expect people to be out for themselves. And I don't even mean. I don't mean that in a bad way. I. I'd like to be clear to all of you. I know you think of me as a nice person that helps everybody, but if we all crash land on an island, I'm going to kill you so my kids can eat too. I would expect nothing else from you. I just, you know, that's all just. Anyway, that's the game. Play the game that, you know. Don't. Don't play the game you want to be playing. Play the game we're actually playing. And be nice because Lauren doesn't need you yelling at her while she's an assistant principal. She don't. She don't get paid enough for your crazy ass to be in there yelling and screaming at her.

[B]

Right, exactly.

[A]

Tell me the best story. No, no details, just the best story. What's the best story from being a principal?

[B]

Oh, I. So my school is on an air force base and I think the best story is we had a crazy parent who had like injured police officers and things in the past. And he came in just yelling at the teacher and yelling at us. And being able to be the one to step out of the room and request a security forces officer to just show up was probably one of my favorite moments.

[A]

You're like, oh, so you got him drugged out of there?

[B]

Yeah, basically like he was no longer our problem because you can't come in here and act like that.

[A]

Very nice. I like you.

[B]

And we're fortunate to have somebody pretty close who can show up in about, oh, I'd say a minute and a half.

[A]

I see you're upset. This is the man with the M16 who's going to help you out.

[B]

Is that nice talking to you?

[A]

Goodbye. Also, I see where your kid gets it. Tata. Yeah, it's tough. It's also tough for the kids. Like nobody asks for a lunatic for a parent, you know what I mean? Like you just. You get what you get. Anyway, good luck to all of you. It ain't. It ain't fun, but you can get. Listen, I being very super serious. I got through it. I'm, you know, a person who, you know, would you, generally speaking, think of as having trouble holding their tongue in situations of stupidity? I just held my tongue. I smiled. I came from a position of being contrite. And I always let them have their. Their power, whether it was real or not. I think that's an important part of negotiation when people. People want to feel powerful. So let them. You know what I mean? And sometimes when you. You just put your head down a little bit and say thank you, that's. They just want to feel like they're in control. So let them. Who cares? Listen, Lauren, I don't know another way to say this. We're all married. Just do that thing you do that stops everybody from fighting. That's all. Lauren. Right? You know what I'm saying? Yeah, yeah. You just. You just shut the f up and nod and go, oh, no, you're right, sweetie. You're right. Just like that. And then everything's fine. And by fine, I mean nobody's yelling.

[B]

Just do that and maybe you'll get what you want.

[A]

Yeah. Pretend you're trying to get laid at the end. That'll motivate you. That's all. Send dads in with that prerequisite you. All the kids will get their insulin pumps taken care of exactly when you want them to. They know how to handle that job. What do you want to do? You want to paint the wall purple? Makes sense to me. I'll go get the paint.

[B]

Yeah, they'll understand that for sure.

[A]

Send the boys in with those marching orders. They know what to do. And for the ladies, you know, if your husband's crazy, just do the thing you do that keeps him from being crazy. Do that. Like that. I don't mean it that way. I mean like the. You know what I mean, Lar, Right?

[B]

Or just, you know, have the meeting without him.

[A]

Be nice. Just be. Be overly nice. Be overly contrite. Just, you know, you're always asking never for permission. Don't ask for permission. That's a bad idea. Like, just, you know, say, this is what we need. What's the best way to make this happen? You know? How can you help me to put this in an order that makes sense to the teacher? Would you help me talk to the teacher about this? Because I'm not sure that everyone understands, you know? Do you want to Set up an educational meeting where we can explain to people why it's important. It's always in that. That perspective from that, you know, that footing of. Can we. Should we just put them in power? And then. And then I'm going to give you my best negotiating tool. This is a simple one. After an ask has been made, the person who speaks first loses. Okay, there. There's life 101 for you. After an ask has been made, the next person to speak loses. So just shut up and sit there. Is it possible for us to have a meeting where the teachers come in and we can educate them for 15 minutes and then don't say another word because what are they going to say? No, no, I don't want to educate the teachers. As soon as you start talking, you're giving away ground. All right? Also, this works when you're buying a car. All right, I've helped you people enough today. I gotta go. All right, come back tomorrow. We'll talk about something else. Lauren, thank you very, very much. I really do appreciate your time. It was lovely of you to come on. If you learn things over the years, if you ever feel like you could put together like a rock solid conversation around 504 plans after you've been in this a little longer, I'm going to be around for a while, so reach back out. Okay?

[B]

Okay. Yeah.

[A]

Awesome. Awesome. Thanks very much. Hold on one second for me. Okay.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Head now to tandomdiabetes.com juice box and check out today's sponsor, Tandem Diabetes Care. I think you're going to find exactly what you're looking for at that link, including a way to sign up and get started with the tandem mobi system. This episode was sponsored by Touched by Type 1. I want you to go find them on Facebook, Instagram and give them a follow. And then head to touchedbytype1.org where you're going to learn all about their programs and resources for people with type 1 diabetes. Today's episode is also sponsored by Eversense CGM. They make the Eversense 365. That thing lasts a whole year. One insertion every year. Come on. You probably feel like I'm messing with you, but I'm not. Eversensecgm.com juicebox okay, well, here we are at the end of the episode. You're still with me. Thank you. I really do appreciate that. What else could you do for me? Why don't you tell a friend about the show or leave a five star review? Maybe you could make sure you're following or subscribed in your podcast app. Go to YouTube and follow me. Or Instagram TikTok. Oh gosh, here's one. Make sure you're following the podcast in the private Facebook group as well as the public Facebook page. You don't want to miss please do you not know about the private group? Group? You have to join the private group. As of this recording, it has 74,000 members. They're active, talking about diabetes. Whatever you need to know. There's a conversation happening in there right now, and I'm there all the time. Tag me. I'll say hi. If you're new to type 1 diabetes, begin with the Bold Beginning series from the podcast. Don't take my word for it. Listen to what reviewers have said. Bold Beginnings is the best first step. I learned more in those episodes than anywhere else. This is when everything finally clicked. People say it takes the stress out of the early days and replaces it with clarity. They tell me this should come with the diagnosis packet that I got at the hospital. And after they listen, they recommend it to everyone who's struggling. It's straightforward, practical, and easy to listen to. Bold Beginnings gives you the basics in a way that actually makes sense. If you have a podcast and you need a fantastic editor, you want Rob from Wrong Way Recording Listen. Truth be told, I'm like 20% smarter. When Rob edits me. He takes out all the, like, gaps of time. And when I go and stuff like that. And it just. I don't know, man. Like, I listen back and I'm like, why do I sound smarter? And then I remember because I did one smart thing. I hired [e-mail].