Podcast Summary: Keep it Positive, Sweetie
Episode: 2-Year Anniversary "Listener’s Choice" - Marinating Over Activating w/ Sarah Jakes Roberts
Release Date: June 15, 2025
Host: Crystal Renee Hayslett
Guest: Sarah Jakes Roberts
Overview
For this special 2-year anniversary “Listener’s Choice” episode, host Crystal Renee Hayslett welcomes author, pastor, and speaker Sarah Jakes Roberts for an in-depth, vulnerable conversation spanning faith, identity, family dynamics, motherhood, healing, and the tension between striving and grace. Sarah brings transparency about her journey—from the struggles and shame of being a teen mom under the public eye, to healing generational wounds, finding her purpose, and creating legacy. Their exchange is soulful, honest, and filled with practical wisdom and funny, candid moments.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. Defining True Power & Purpose (03:01–04:29)
- Crystal opens with a powerful quote from Sarah’s new book Power Moves:
“The only thing worse than being powerless is falling for the illusion that power can be amassed by what you have instead of who you are willing to become.” (03:19, Sarah Jakes Roberts as quoted by Crystal)
- They discuss how many people seek fulfillment through accomplishments, possessions, or status, but real power is tied to internal transformation and identity.
- Sarah highlights: Many who appear to "have it all" still feel empty, showing that external achievements don’t guarantee satisfaction.
2. Learning Grace Over Perfectionism (04:29–06:05)
- Crystal shares her journey from perfectionism—rooted in childhood experiences—to learning to extend grace to herself and others.
- Sarah reflects on moving from shame to new self-worth after having a child as a teen and how breaking free from perfectionism begins with accepting your own value, not others’ opinions.
"Coming to a space where I find worth and value in myself has allowed me to work on my own set of ethics that weren't based on someone else's opinion…” (06:08, SJR)
3. Navigating Shame and Healing from Early Trauma (07:44–11:45)
- Sarah recalls being pregnant at 13 and experiencing shame, particularly from her church community:
“That was the beginning of shame...the embarrassment and ashamed happened before I was even showing.” (10:04, SJR)
- She describes how people’s judgments led to isolation and being labeled “contagious,” and reflects on the damaging effects of exclusion versus having real conversations with young people.
4. Parenting with Openness & Breaking Cycles (11:45–14:29)
- Sarah’s approach to parenting is radical transparency: encouraging her daughters to ask anything, prioritizing honesty, and checking in about the messages they receive from culture.
- Crystal reveals her own fears about motherhood in today’s world, given the influence of social media and pop culture.
- They both reflect humorously and seriously on how music and media shaped their own adolescence.
5. Balancing Identity: Motherhood, Calling, Partnership (16:51–19:22)
- Sarah unpacks her “parking lot” metaphor (from her book) to illustrate how she balances the many roles: mother, spouse, leader, etc.
- She keeps her family center stage by planning her schedule around her children’s needs, even amid touring and public ministry.
- On partnership: Sarah appreciates that her husband knows “how much it costs [her] to be [her],” and provides a safe, grounding space.
6. Navigating Influence, Trust, and Legacy (23:27–30:50)
- Sarah shares what it meant for her father, Bishop T.D. Jakes, to publicly pass her the torch of Woman Thou Art Loosed:
“For him to say, I'm going to lay this at your feet…it restored a part of me that felt like I had lost his trust…” (24:44, SJR)
- She’s honest about not always feeling “deserving” of influence and how she differentiates between honoring her platform and feeling defined by it:
“It's hard to feel safe in influence. So the influence part, I just try to honor and protect. But my family, that's where I feel God's love the most.” (29:19, SJR)
7. Therapy, Faith, and Healing the Mother Wound (33:02–39:58)
- Both discuss the power of therapy in deepening their faith and giving language to what prayer can’t always reach.
- Sarah shares a moving moment when her mother apologized for past emotional absence—a conversation that unexpectedly “healed” her childhood wounds:
“Mommy sees me…as long as you’re still here, you have an opportunity to speak into that wound.” (36:11, SJR)
- They encourage listeners not to underestimate the power of starting hard conversations in families.
8. Sabbath, Rest, and Asking for Help (41:00–44:47)
- Sarah confesses she previously prided herself on capacity and overcommitment, but has learned to proactively ask for help and resist overexertion.
“Instead of being the person who allowed people to believe that I had limitless capacity…I had to be willing to say, I actually do need to skip a beat because I can’t dance this fast.” (41:57, SJR)
- Both laugh about the difficulty of letting go of toxic “do it all” mindsets.
9. Marriage and Maintaining Individuality (49:04–54:07)
- Sarah and her husband Toure (PT) Roberts maintain respect for each other's gifts, never seeing each other’s strengths as competition:
“I am fascinated by the gift of God in his life…I can’t even be jealous.” (49:28, SJR)
- Their partnership is rooted in mutual support, shared ministry, and ordinary moments of humor and connection at home.
10. Wrapping Up: The Power of Marinating Over Activating (62:28–64:16)
- Listener Question: A single mom writes in, feeling “stuck” and afraid to activate on dreams.
- Advice from Crystal: Wait for God’s “yes,” create quiet spaces for discernment, and let things marinate before activating (“I done activated some things I should have let marinate for a while!” 62:27, Crystal)
- Advice from Sarah: Name your fears, interrogate what’s really true, and don’t rush:
“Sometimes what I’m marinating on isn’t even possible…take time to decide what exactly makes me feel stuck and is it really true?” (63:39, SJR)
Notable Quotes & Moments
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On Transparency & Parenting:
“I want them to always feel center stage... you're not just in my world, I want to be a part of your world.” (13:30, SJR)
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On Trust & Restoration:
“[Passing the torch] restored a part of me that felt like I had lost his job trust.” (24:44, SJR)
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On Influence & Safety:
“It's hard to feel safe in influence... my family, that's where I feel God's love the most.” (29:19, SJR)
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On Therapy & Faith:
“My relationship with God has become much deeper as a result of therapy...I’ve become a much better partner, leader, and believer.” (33:02–34:29, SJR)
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On Legacy and Family Healing:
“As long as you're still here, you have an opportunity to speak into that wound. And it really does restore, it really does heal.” (36:11, SJR)
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On Marriage & Respect:
"All I can do is respect [my husband’s] gift and love it and be grateful that I'm on your squad." (49:28, SJR)
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On Rest and Capacity:
“I had to learn to not seek out the accolades that come with overexertion.” (42:52, SJR)
Timestamps for Important Segments
| Timestamp | Theme/Segment | |-----------|-----------------------------------------------------------------| | 03:01 | Power, Identity, and Internal Transformation | | 06:08 | Breaking Free from Perfectionism and Shame | | 10:04 | The Beginning of Shame and Public Humiliation | | 13:30 | Parenting with Radical Transparency | | 24:44 | Receiving the Torch & Restoring Trust with Her Father | | 29:19 | Navigating Influence, Safety, and Family Love | | 33:02 | Faith Enhanced by Therapy | | 36:11 | Mother-Daughter Healing Conversation | | 41:57 | Having Limits & Asking for Help | | 49:28 | Mutual Respect in Marriage | | 62:27 | Marinating Over Activating – Listener Advice | | 63:39 | Breaking Down the Real Reason for Feeling Stuck | | 66:28 | Embracing Lovability |
Tone & Style
The conversation is warm, witty, unflinchingly honest, and rooted in faith. Both women balance humor and depth, creating a safe space for vulnerable truths about womanhood, healing, and pursuing purpose. Sarah’s candor about her own trauma, mistakes, and growth models the honesty and self-compassion the "Keep it Positive, Sweetie" community stands for.
Closing Affirmations
- Crystal: “Keep marinating until it’s time to activate, sweetie.” (67:33)
- Sarah: “Keep it authentic, sweetie.” (67:40)
For listeners navigating their own transitions, searching for healing, or trying to discern their next steps, this episode offers deep encouragement: move at your pace, honor your story, stay authentic, and remember you’re already lovable—grace included.
