Tamela Mann (2:47)

Well, thank you so much.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (2:47)

You look really good.

Tamela Mann (2:48)

Thank you. I'm just trying to stay healthy. Trying to stay healthy and even with working on the new music. And I'm just saying this right off the top, it's just I'm starting, like, from inside out.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (2:58)

That's beautiful.

Tamela Mann (2:59)

So when you say by looking at the body, but it's like, mental, I'm trying to make sure my mental's right, my spirit man is right. And the body, I see it.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (3:06)

I see it as a woman. I struggle with my weight going up and down, up and down. It's been one of those things. And being more transparent about it, I've noticed that a lot of people struggle with the same thing.

Tamela Mann (3:19)

That's right.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (3:20)

But for me, like you said, inside out, I recently just did a trip where I was learning about so many different things, but the main thing was what we eat, exercising, socializing. And it talked about how, even with dementia, how if you don't do these things. And I was like, ooh. I was like, so it's already starting now, and I don't even know it. Like, it all says 20, 30 years before you even, like, can feel it or have any type of symptoms. So, like, I started really taking it serious.

Tamela Mann (3:48)

I know. Because, you know, my mom was had.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (3:51)

Yes, I did.

Tamela Mann (3:51)

So I. I went through that with her. So my constant prayers, like, lord, keep my mind.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (3:57)

Lord, keep my mind. Yes.

Tamela Mann (3:58)

Because I just still. Even when it comes to. Your mind is a part of everything that you do and how we function.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (4:05)

Yeah.

Tamela Mann (4:05)

And I'm like, when it comes to my singing, it's like my relationship. And then when it comes to the second part, which is my singing is so important, I'm like, lord, I need to remember what I got to say.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (4:16)

Yes.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (4:17)

Oh, my goodness.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (4:17)

Yeah.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (4:17)

There's some times where I get on stage, I'm like, I have one blank.

Tamela Mann (4:22)

It's like, what's my first word? What's my first word? Cause I think, too, it's like the nervousness. It's like, it kind of. People's like, you still get nervous, but I do.

David Mann (4:33)

I really.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (4:34)

Even to this day, the camel man gets nervous.

Tamela Mann (4:35)

Camel man gets nervous every time. You may not see it, but I'm shaking in my boots.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (4:40)

You know what Tyler taught me, though? Cause he would call me, like, before I had something big to do. He's like, you nervous? I'm like, nope, I'm good. He was like, that's not good. And I was like, what do you mean? He said, you need to feel something so you can lean on God.

Tamela Mann (4:51)

That is it. That is. He took it right out of my mouth. And then I'm depending on his strength.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (4:57)

His power, and that's what we feel.

Tamela Mann (4:59)

And that. Exactly. Cause it's like, ooh. But once I get them first couple words out, I'm good after that.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (5:05)

I love that we both work in the entertainment industry. We're both actors, and it's such a vain industry. And being that, like, I know for me, I'm really hard on myself when I gain weight, I'm like, I gotta lose it. I gotta lose it. And my audience, they see, they're like, she's too hard on herself. Like, she's fine the way she is. Have you ever had moments where you, like, Tam, you gotta get on it or feel like you fell off the bandwagon because you.

Tamela Mann (5:28)

Yes, I done fell off. Like you said, on and off a lot. But what happens is, it's like, I really. This time, it's like I'm really trying to concentrate on it because I want to be healthy or not causing myself to have or deal with different issues for us medically.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (5:44)

Yes.

Tamela Mann (5:45)

So that has been most of the. The. My concentration on it and trying to make better choices. It's not good every day, y'.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (5:52)

All.

Tamela Mann (5:52)

It's not happening every day. Making the best choice. But I'm just really trying to change my lifestyle thinking. So it's. You know, it's just. I think it's just a part of how all of us are made, because we all have different things that. That we have to work on. And for me, weight has been that. That thing. But. But I honestly came into the world big. I was nine and a half pounds, so I've been thick my whole life, but I can't just ride. I realize in talking to myself and, yes, speaking to myself, that you gotta. You can't make that an excuse.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (6:24)

Yeah.

Tamela Mann (6:25)

And you gotta just make better choices.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (6:27)

Yeah.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (6:27)

You said it's not always good. I have this challenge called the did you move today? Challenge, where I challenge my audience to get up and at least work out one hour a day.

Tamela Mann (6:36)

Oh, that's good.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (6:37)

Yeah.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (6:38)

But the last few weeks, I feel like I haven't been doing what I'm preaching. Like, I'm inspiring people to do these things, but my schedule is so crazy that I can't keep up with it. Do you have moments where you're like.

Tamela Mann (6:53)

Dang, yes, it is. And when it comes to working out, I have fallen off the bandwagon. But the thing for me is, once I do get up, it is a constant move. It's not like I'm sitting down True. I'm, like, moving. I'm not necessarily exercising, but I'm constantly moving and not just sitting. So I think that has worked for me, but I really do need to get a regimen in. I like to walk, but I like to walk outside. And even in my neighborhood, it's a cool neighborhood, but people still stop. I have FedEx. Not the FedEx, the UPS, man. They stop. My wife. Can we take a picture?

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (7:28)

Yes.

Tamela Mann (7:29)

I'm like, sir, I can't stop and talk to you. You see me out here trying to exercise.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (7:33)

Yes.

Tamela Mann (7:33)

I said I'm trying to get myself right. Take a picture. You know, it's like you love people, but it's like you are, like, in those selfish. I can speak for myself. The selfish moment where I'm really trying to concentrate on me and get me better. But that thing like that happened. That's why I really stopped going to a major gym, because people was standing beside the treadmill talking.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (7:56)

Literally. It's so annoying.

Tamela Mann (7:58)

It could be rough. We love y', all, so don't misunderstand. Yes, but we just trying to get it together. Just like that.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (8:04)

Literally. No. And then sometimes, like, you're. You're in a very vulnerable space when you're in the gym, like, no makeup. You know what I'm saying? Just trying to. And sometimes we don't feel our best selves, but. But we're trying to get to that point where we feel good about ourselves.

Tamela Mann (8:14)

That's right.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (8:15)

And people just want to come up and. Can I take a picture? I'm like, I look crazy.

Tamela Mann (8:17)

This is. No, you don't. You look beautiful.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (8:20)

Okay.

Tamela Mann (8:21)

I said, now, you know, you telling the untruth right now. And I will say, you know, I'm really into water aerobics. So it's like, you know, you wet. You got the wet look for real. And it's like, y' all come. You know. But people, you know, I really appreciate because you guys and the people following us make us who we are and the support of what you do. But it's like. But we still human, too.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (8:45)

Yeah, we are.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (8:46)

That is so true. I've noticed that you've really taken fashion to another level. You have the Taylor man collection. Yes. Is this part of your collection?

Tamela Mann (8:55)

No, this is not part of the collection. But I'm trying to link first. I was just into. I'm into have at leisure things now, but I'm trying to lean more over to more comfortable, easy go things like this. So this is the vein and the avenue that I'm Going to. But I'm into really heavily the shapewear. Like, now I have new. The latte color that matches our skin. Okay. And it's a nice thing. You know, my shapewear, I love about it. I wear it every day. It's comfortable. It gives you a snatch, but it's a comfortable snatch.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (9:24)

See, I need. That's what I need.

Tamela Mann (9:25)

And it gives you a lift. You know where it help. You know, you already got that bun done, so it's just gonna, you know, just give you a little bit more lift. But, you know, it ain't gonna take it out of portion, but it's gonna hold you. That's what I love about that. I love about this.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (9:37)

Okay. I need to get some shape. Some of your shapewear. Because I. For me, it's hard to find shapewear that's comfortable.

Tamela Mann (9:42)

And I wear it every day. And no joke, y', all, I don't wear underwear. I just wear shapewear.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (9:49)

Okay, There you go. Okay.

Tamela Mann (9:50)

Every day. Every day, y'. All.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (9:52)

It's a secret.

Tamela Mann (9:53)

That is. If it's a secret. That's it. Tell them a man shapewear.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (9:57)

Because sometimes I do notice, like, if I do wear underwear, like, I can see the indention. So it's not all smooth.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (10:04)

You can smooth. Got it.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (10:06)

Tip of the day. Thank you.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (10:10)

Yes.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (10:12)

So you are a mother and entertainer. How have you been able to manage this for all these years?

Tamela Mann (10:18)

It can be rough. Our early years was really rough, especially when the kids were younger and even when they got into their teenage years and because that's when, like, the plays really took off. And then we started, you know, with the television stuff. So we would be gone for months at a time until, like, you know, Tyler's smashed it down or crunched it down. Now we go even faster. But we would be gone, and we missed a lot of stuff. So a lot of times it was hard for us, you know, Like, I can remember one day I was standing on side of the stage and we were doing Meet the Browns to play, and I just started crying. Cause my son had a game. My daughter was getting ready for the prom, but we were out doing the show. We had made the commitment.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (11:03)

Wow.

Tamela Mann (11:04)

Yeah. So I missed it. So it's like, I'm talking to them, he's talking to him play by play with football. And I'm saying, okay, what you gonna wear? What color you gonna do? You know, what the dress look like? You know? So it's like, still trying to present. Yes, Trying to be present. But it was rough. But a lot of times we would work. But once we come home, we dedicated it to family time, where I concentrated on them. If anything or events was happening, if my kids couldn't come, I wasn't going. I know that's right, because I felt like I had already been gone. And if I'm home, they should be with me. And that's how me and David kind of went about it. Just making sure that we got that family time in. Because it is important to us, even to this day. But everybody now has their own families and kids and everything. So I'm letting them also make their own traditions with their friends. Even though me and Daddy would. David. I'm sorry. Me and David were always, you know, saying, like you said it right. When things happen, we really like things to happen at our house. But we've been like that with them since they were kids. They had every event. If they were gonna have a party, we want everybody to have their party at our house so we could kind of see what was going on.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (12:10)

My parents were like that too. Everybody come here.

Tamela Mann (12:12)

Yes. So we did that a lot, but we kind of learned how to kind of set times for the acting set, Learning to set times for the music and things like that. And it's working. I mean, we've been doing it. Everything hadn't been perfect, but it's working.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (12:28)

That's amazing. What have been some of the challenges, besides not just being able to be there physically?

Tamela Mann (12:35)

Physically, just being away was, to me, the hardest part, actually not being there. But the other challenge for me, if I could turned the question a little bit, is when I was trying to do release music and we were filming at the same time, where it got so overwhelming that I was actually, I study a lot. It's like I get in the bathtub with my scripts and I'm reading. And I'm a physical. More so than the iPad. I like the paper.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (13:00)

The paper. Okay. See, I'm an iPad girl.

Tamela Mann (13:02)

I want the actual paper. So I'm there trying to do the lines. And I was so tired because it's like we filmed all week. The whole weekend I was out promoting. So it's like I had no time to just wind down. And I got in the tub trying to remember. I was like. I started crying. I said, I don't wanna do this no more. Cause I couldn't remember, recall no lines. It's like my brain was so full that I said, it's not staying. It's not sticking. I can't remember. He was like, well, this is how you do it. And David is the kind. He can read it twice. He knows everybody's stuff.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (13:36)

He's that guy. Okay.

Tamela Mann (13:37)

He is that person. Well, he knows everybody's lines where he could have to. Cause he be doing like this.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (13:42)

Oop.

David Mann (13:42)

Yeah.

Tamela Mann (13:44)

He's sitting on the side saying my lines with me. And Roger Bob was like, stop that. He was like, what? He was like, you're actually saying her lines as she's saying them. So he was like, I don't even realize it, but that to me was one of the biggest challenges for me is to. When things kind of stacked up on top of each other. Yeah, that's been like, the hardest part for me. And I was like, I can't do it that way anymore. I gotta schedule things differently where I can think straight and concentrate on what is at hand. So in that way.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (14:17)

Amazing. You mentioned that your mother had dementia. I know as we get older, our parents end up almost becoming our children. Like the roles reverse. And a lot of people don't talk about the weight that that carries. When you have to take care of your parent who's. Who can't remember things. What was that like? And what are some things that maybe you can sow into people who are dealing with that now.

Tamela Mann (14:38)

That's good. First of all, you just have to really be patient with the person. With your mother, like Cassidy is like. It is a reverse role of them becoming your. It's like you become the parent. But to me, it's like I pray for patience for it. But then there's a time that I had to ask God to help me. David helped me because I was crying a lot because I was missing the connection that me and my mother had. And so it's like, really, it's a lot of patience. And you have to take the help where help is. Because sometimes it's like you feel like. Well, I felt like I was trying to do it even with coming in and out, I was trying to do a lot of it on my own. And then sometimes when your family is not coming in to help, those things of just really being really patient and being patient with the person itself because it can get frustrating, especially if my mother was really easy, but I dealt with because my first job was at a senior citizen home.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (15:43)

Really?

Tamela Mann (15:44)

Yes, I was a nurse's aide. So that kind of prepared me in the long run of what happens. And I just remembered, you got to be very loving. Remember that they're there. Don't forget about them. Don't forget about them. Because you have to make sure that you put it in time. Even though you have your life, your taking care of your family and all that. But it's really good to make sure that that person just feels your presence. They may not even know you're there, but you just talk to them as if they know. Because it's like I was kind of giving my mother play by play. We got to the point we was buying our first home, and I took her and I said, mama. Cause she never owned a home. I was like, mom, we're buying a house, and this is the house. And she was just standing there, like, looking y', all, like, into the bliss. But I was like, I just really hate that she couldn't be. It's really hard for me to talk about my mom. Cause it really brings me to tears. Because as my careers took off, that's when the Alzheimer's happened. And we were with Kirk Franklin and her family at the time, singing. So it's like she didn't get to. After all the prayers, she didn't get to see any of my career or the fruits of her labor. And her praying for me.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (16:57)

Yeah.

Tamela Mann (16:58)

So being patient with her and just trying to just whine and dine her as much as I could, I would just say. But it's really the patience.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (17:06)

Yeah.

Tamela Mann (17:07)

Really the patience. And taking time to even go sit with them. Even though they don't know that you're there, they may not know who you are.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (17:15)

Yeah.

Tamela Mann (17:16)

It's really. To me, that's a big part. And even the nurses state that that family still needs to come and check on their people.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (17:23)

Yeah.

Tamela Mann (17:24)

And that's something that, like I said, I learned early on. So it kind of promoted. Prepared me for when that time came. And it came very important to me where I would come and visit with my mother. But I start visiting with other people.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (17:35)

Really?

Tamela Mann (17:36)

Yeah. That's beautiful. You know, so just to let them know that they're not alone.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (17:40)

Alone.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (17:41)

Yeah.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (17:41)

Because a lot of people are there alone. They are when they get into nursing homes.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (17:45)

Yeah.

Tamela Mann (17:46)

So those are just. That's just a few. That's just a part of it. But it is a very, very painful disease to see.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (17:55)

Yes.

Tamela Mann (17:55)

Because it's like my mother's shell was in good shape, but for her mind to just be gone and she just sit there. She got to the point where it's like she wasn't talking, but it's like, if you came this way, she would always move her mouth. Always move her mouth like you was about to feed her every time. Oh, so it was just different things, but each person is different. So you have some people that snap back and they start talking, but they kind of seen me.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (18:21)

That was my grandmother.

Tamela Mann (18:23)

So you just have to remember the person.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (18:25)

Yes.

Tamela Mann (18:25)

And remember the moments, the precious moments and memories that you had with them beforehand. And he would bring things to my remembrance, and we would laugh about it, and it helped us be able to cope with it better.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (18:39)

Right. That's beautiful. And, yeah. I know a lot of people deal with that, so I definitely wanted to touch on that, just see how we can help other people. Because sometimes people feel like they're alone in it.

Tamela Mann (18:47)

Yeah.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (18:47)

When they're the ones given the care, it isn't.

Tamela Mann (18:51)

And you can feel very, very alone.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (18:53)

Yeah.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (18:53)

No. For sure.

Tamela Mann (18:55)

Well, okay.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (18:57)

The reason you're here. You have a new album.

Tamela Mann (19:01)

Yes.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (19:01)

Live, Breathe, Fight.

Tamela Mann (19:03)

I want to.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (19:03)

I'm. I'm an artist, too. I want to know what the creative process was like for this album.

Tamela Mann (19:08)

This process for me was. I kind of. It's funny, but I kind of like how Taylor Swift has talked about her life.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (19:16)

Yes.

Tamela Mann (19:17)

This album, I talked about my life of, like, the different challenges that we were dealing with and facing. Like, the first single, working for me, Some lot of things was happening in the core of, like, my family, and it put me in a different place that I never thought that I would be in. And the Enemy was just really raising his head up, but I was determined not to be distracted because it's like, right when we decided to do music, but it's like, every time it's time for me to release music, something happened.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (19:46)

Yeah.

Tamela Mann (19:46)

Yes. I mean, like, it's the craziest thing. So it was really, really hard. So I had. During the year, I was like, lord, what do we need to talk about? And I just started taking out, taking notes for the last year and a half, and I was just having little nuggets that I took to the producers to talk about. And working for me was like, even though the Lord comforted me with saying, even though you don't see me working, I'm working for you. I'm working in your behalf. And even one song, All Things is another song that's on there that. That the Lord can do all things.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (20:22)

Yes.

Tamela Mann (20:22)

Even though it may look crazy and rocky right now, it's like I was talking, okay, he can do all things. Then we were talking about Carry on as another title. Then it's talking about live, and then the live, breathing fight. It's like, even though it's happening to me, I Gotta live cuz heaven is my destiny yeah I've got to breathe I'm breathing every breath with purpose. And then I know I have a call yeah and I know I have a purpose yeah and then I'm fighting and I'm gonna fight till I get the victory. So the Lord was just like, to me, this is stuff not only for me, but this could bless his people. So it's like give me the direction.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (20:57)

Yeah.

Tamela Mann (20:58)

Of what to talk about. So live. It's like. Because a lot of things, I've never seen it so much in our community that I have now with the mental space that a lot of us are in.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (21:10)

Yeah.

Tamela Mann (21:11)

It's been really, really heavy. And a lot of the songs are just talking. That's what I'm saying from the inside out. That I'm making sure that my mental space is good, that I'm keeping, that I'm having peace of mind. So enough peace to just when I lay down at night that I could rest, that I can rest in him. And God has just really given us as a couple. Even through the things, through the challenges that we were facing, like in the company with the family. Just different things that I'm with you, I have not forsaken you, that, you know, everything that you're asking for, I'm here. And it's like, soon as some things change, it's like the Lord just start just stirring up just different things where things were just coming. Working our behalf.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (21:56)

Yes.

Tamela Mann (21:56)

In our favor, for our good.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (21:58)

Yeah.

Tamela Mann (21:59)

And I just, I'm just so excited about each of the songs. One song on there is called Big Facts. But what happened is the Lord was like, you have to examine yourself, look in the mirror, take a look at yourself, face the facts about you. Because a lot of times a lot of us are trying to see, say to other people. Okay, well, you need to. And you need to. When a lot of times the work needs to begin with you.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (22:27)

Yeah.

Tamela Mann (22:27)

So the Lord let me know in this album, the process of it to work on you and then I can do the work around you.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (22:33)

Yes.

Tamela Mann (22:34)

So, you know, just listen, just. Just hear what's being said. A lot of times it's not always to respond, but just take your time and what your response gonna be. Because a lot of times my response is like what I did. And I, you know, we just tend to just go there. And the Lord has really given me, gave me a lot of peace. Even though I did a lot of weeping when I was recording it, I was crying, just even talking the songs Through.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (23:00)

Yeah. Oh.

Tamela Mann (23:02)

And, you know, it's like. But I gotta. But I gotta finish. I gotta complete the work.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (23:06)

Yeah.

Tamela Mann (23:07)

So it's just.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (23:07)

It's been therapeutic.

Tamela Mann (23:09)

Yes. Very therapeutic. So I think, you know, but. But a lot of the responses. It's out now. And a lot of the response that I got back is people saying these songs feel like affirmation, and it's really helping me. It's once. One song is called Power. It's talking about the power of God.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (23:24)

Yeah.

Tamela Mann (23:24)

That sometimes we forget if we cast our cares on him. He got all the power.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (23:28)

Yes, he got.

Tamela Mann (23:30)

He's in control. So he's handling the things. All the things that you're trying to do and to trust him. One song is Lord, I trust you. So each title is.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (23:40)

Yes.

Tamela Mann (23:40)

Is hitting arms issues and situations that a lot of us are dealing with.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (23:45)

Absolutely.

Tamela Mann (23:46)

So I came from a real place.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (23:47)

You did a real, real place. Talent. Thank you so much, guys. Up next, we have joining us, David Mann.

Tamela Mann (23:54)

Yes. My boo.

David Mann (23:56)

See, that's who I become when we out. It's like, I'm not. I'm not. I'm either Mr. Brown or Tamla's husband.

Tamela Mann (24:02)

That's so true.

David Mann (24:03)

I'm okay with it. I'm fine with it. Either way, I get to be next to her.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (24:07)

Yes. I. I love it. Thank you both for coming to join me. Thank you, David. I know you and Tamla have a lot going on. You actually help with her music. You help with everything. You actually the one that texted me and said, hey, we need to get on. Keep it positive, sweetie.

David Mann (24:19)

That's right.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (24:19)

This man is everything.

David Mann (24:23)

What my initial text was how proud and how happy I am.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (24:27)

You always let me know.

David Mann (24:28)

I just like, I'm just so happy because, you know, couldn't happen to a better person. So then I was like, you know, well, why don't we just bring Tam on? What? I said, yeah, she'll come. Yeah. So thank you for having us.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (24:40)

Absolutely. No, I appreciate it. So I've known you both, I guess, personally since 2019, right before COVID hit, when Tyler was doing the farewell tour and I was the costume designer for that set. And I really got to know you both. And actually it was before that you didn't say much.

David Mann (24:57)

You would just be sitting there like this.

Tamela Mann (24:59)

But you still. When we still. It was still. When you were doing wardrobe.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (25:02)

I was still doing wardrobe.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (25:03)

Yeah.

David Mann (25:04)

I hadn't even just lay it back in the cut.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (25:06)

Yeah.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (25:06)

Literally.

David Mann (25:07)

That's what I like about you. You just laid back in the cut. And waited your turn.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (25:10)

Yeah, Waited.

David Mann (25:11)

Like, when your time came, you were like, let's rock, baby.

Tamela Mann (25:15)

Let's rock.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (25:16)

But what I love about you both is that you guys are exactly who you are on camera in real life. Cause, you know, sometimes you meet people, and it's like, dang, you disappointed. You wasn't who I thought you was.

David Mann (25:27)

He's like, you mean they happen to you too?

Tamela Mann (25:30)

Yes.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (25:31)

Oh, my goodness.

Tamela Mann (25:32)

You too?

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (25:32)

Yeah.

David Mann (25:33)

Ooh. It happened to her big time. There was. Well, I won't say the name.

Tamela Mann (25:37)

It was just a name. I wouldn't say you been.

David Mann (25:40)

I'm not gonna say the name.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (25:41)

Don't say it.

David Mann (25:42)

Well, this one particular person, she grew up idolizing.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (25:45)

Wow.

David Mann (25:46)

And so this is when we were with Kirk Franklin and the family. We're doing our live recording, and they.

Tamela Mann (25:50)

Were one of the guests.

David Mann (25:51)

This particular person's gonna be the special guest of our live recording.

Tamela Mann (25:54)

Did this girl say who? Not the.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (25:56)

Ooh.

Tamela Mann (25:57)

Oh, I thought you said who.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (25:58)

No, we not gonna do. No, we keep it positive. Not messy.

David Mann (26:00)

Okay.

Tamela Mann (26:01)

Okay.

David Mann (26:02)

And so she was, like, so hyped and geeked, and it's like, oh, my God. I get to finally meet my idol. Oh, my God.

Tamela Mann (26:08)

Hey.

David Mann (26:08)

And it was like, hey. And she was devastated. So I think that's why we treat people like we treat. You never know what a positive smile, a hug, a picture is gonna do for somebody. And so that's why we, like. We are.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (26:23)

Oh, man. I love it. So you two, like, for me, y' all are the epitome of relationship. I just love y'. All. I had you on my live show. We talked about relationships. You guys were so transparent and funny.

Tamela Mann (26:35)

That was great.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (26:36)

We had a ball.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (26:38)

Yes.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (26:38)

But I want to dive more into your relationship and how you guys have withstood the test of time with the ebbs and flows of relationships. I know. I just. As an older woman, I talk to my parents, and they're like, girl, yeah, we've been. I'm like, I thought it was perfect all the time. Yes. I want to know, like, what are some things you guys have gone through and how you made it through those. Those things.

David Mann (27:00)

You know, I always tell people, yeah, we're loving. We kind. We love each other. All that. But one thing we are most is we're working because we're a work in progress. We know that things are changing. She's not the same woman I married at 21.

Tamela Mann (27:14)

That's right.

David Mann (27:14)

I'm the same man at 21. We were babies. I understand. She's not the same. Yeah, we did. We grew up with each other. We literally grew up with each other, because there were some times where we were like, you're not good. You're not a good person.

Tamela Mann (27:34)

You're not nice. You're not nice.

David Mann (27:36)

And so we grew up with each other. And, you know, I realized at 35, she was different. 45, she's different. We're 58 now. We're getting to ride. And the result. We're now living the result of all of that.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (27:51)

Yeah.

David Mann (27:51)

And so, you know, how we survive in this industry is accountability. A lot of times, people don't have accountability. Simple accountability will take you a long way.

Tamela Mann (28:03)

That's right.

David Mann (28:03)

You know? Cause sometimes she'll check me like, bae. And when I do her, what I.

Tamela Mann (28:09)

Say, I say, Tamela, man, they call my home. I'm like, oh. He was like, you shouldn't. And then I was like, oh, okay. I love it.

David Mann (28:19)

And even, like, now as we go in our. In our late 50s, and we. We're. We have a different challenge now. Menopause.

Tamela Mann (28:26)

Yes. And, man, you ain't gonna put me out there in them streets by myself.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (28:33)

Right, right.

Tamela Mann (28:34)

Menopause, too.

David Mann (28:36)

We realize, like, that's a thing.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (28:38)

It is a thing.

David Mann (28:39)

You know, there are some couples out there that. That go, yeah, late in life, that you say, how is somebody getting divorced 35, 40 years into their marriage?

Tamela Mann (28:47)

And we was like, that has to be it. But I think what helped us. David, when I start, you know, he could see the change. When you start what going through the chain.

David Mann (28:56)

We started what?

Tamela Mann (28:57)

You noticed the change.

David Mann (28:58)

Say it out your mouth.

Tamela Mann (28:59)

No.

David Mann (28:59)

Repent right now.

Tamela Mann (29:00)

Say it out your mouth. He. He was like, sam, you going. I was like, no, I'm not. I'm not. But it's like he actually sit and read up on and research memories. Menopause. So he came back and he understood it more. And I think that's what happened with a lot of our friends that have divorced is the man didn't realize what.

David Mann (29:25)

That it's a real thing, that the woman. We think. We think they just want to be that way. You just want to act like it's.

Tamela Mann (29:31)

Such a crushing feeling, y'.

David Mann (29:33)

All.

Tamela Mann (29:33)

It's because it's like you could be happy. Then all of a sudden, it's like sadness, or it's almost like not just the heat that comes from it, but a sadness comes over your body, and it's like, you're really not. Cause I'm like, I was just fine. I was in a good place. You Feel like I'm on the bottom of the flow.

David Mann (29:53)

You could be sitting in.

Tamela Mann (29:54)

Y' all look, flow, not floor flow.

David Mann (29:56)

Y' all kissing and making love, and then all of a sudden she pull a knife on you. No, that's not.

Tamela Mann (30:02)

That is not. Don't say that. Cause people gonna take it.

David Mann (30:06)

I'mma stab you. No, I'm just kidding. I don't want nobody say, tam the man pull a knife on me.

Tamela Mann (30:12)

No, but it's. But it's something. It's a roller coaster dealing with menopause. And the thing is, we really don't talk about it a lot. My first lady in my church, I just went to praying. I was like, lord, I gotta be before people in front of people. People are approaching me. And some days, you know, even my daughter, she was like, woo, mama. If your eyes could burn, you set somebody on fire.

David Mann (30:36)

We call her meanie Queenie.

Tamela Mann (30:38)

I was like. I was like. I say for real.

David Mann (30:41)

She was like, yeah, tell her your prayer now.

Tamela Mann (30:44)

Lord, make me sweet. Just help me.

David Mann (30:47)

She wake up, literally.

Tamela Mann (30:51)

Because. Because that's like. I don't want. It's not, you know, not even for those who are watching today. It's like, in case of a day come by and. And I don't greet you as nice. I just want us to know as women. Just like when you have. You think having your monthly is rough?

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (31:09)

Yes.

Tamela Mann (31:09)

Menopause is, say, 10 times worse than that.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (31:12)

Oh, wow.

David Mann (31:13)

I mean, not that I didn't agree.

Tamela Mann (31:15)

I'm not.

David Mann (31:16)

I'm just agreeing with you. I'm in the amo, amen corner.

Tamela Mann (31:19)

But it. I mean, but it is. We can be rough and all of us deal with it different. Different ways.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (31:25)

I think it's bad now, like, just when I'm, like, for the month. No, but.

David Mann (31:29)

Yeah, but you have to have somebody that understands because it's a. When she say, I read up on it. I literally read an entire book.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (31:37)

Oh, wow. You educated yourself.

David Mann (31:39)

Yeah. On menopause? Yes, because I understood that.

Tamela Mann (31:41)

Oh, menopause.

David Mann (31:42)

You said it was. I meant menopause.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (31:45)

I thought. I was the only one that said.

David Mann (31:46)

Yeah, you thought menopause. It's a chemical imbalance.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (31:50)

It is, yeah.

David Mann (31:51)

And I told her. And like I was telling her earlier today, I said, one of the worst things you could tell a woman with menopause is you got menopause.

Tamela Mann (32:03)

My radiator overheated.

David Mann (32:06)

Nobody got. Nobody got no menopause. You the one got menopause.

Tamela Mann (32:10)

I said, my doctor told me I ain't in. No.

David Mann (32:12)

I said, well, your doctor ignorant and don't know what she talking about.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (32:15)

Like, I see it. That is funny. I'm. I had 42 on Friday.

Tamela Mann (32:21)

Oh, happy birthday.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (32:21)

Thank you.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (32:22)

But round 40, I started, like, sweating randomly. Like, it was just, like, I would get hot and I would carry this fan with me everywhere, like. Cause I get. At any moment, I can just, like, get hot. I can get excited about something to get warm. And Tyler makes fun of me because I always had that fan.

Tamela Mann (32:38)

He's like.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (32:38)

And I'm always asking for ice.

Tamela Mann (32:40)

Yeah.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (32:41)

I was like, I need a bucket of ice for my water to keep it ice cold. And a fan at all.

David Mann (32:48)

This was on set. They know. So you got him hid every day.

Tamela Mann (32:52)

You ain't gotta have no ice water. I was like, yes, I do. Yeah, but it. But it's. That's one thing. See, well, that's. That helps me, because I didn't know that other people was asking for ice.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (33:00)

Oh, honey.

Tamela Mann (33:01)

But I'm asking for ice. And. Well, I faith you said that yesterday. I just need a cup of ice, so. That is so true. So I'm not alone.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (33:09)

You are not alone in that.

David Mann (33:10)

We've definitely learned. We've had to learn, especially in everything that comes with this business, to make sure that we're solid, we're tight, and. Because it's a lot of stuff coming. I mean, you know. You know, in this game, you know, you have guys always trying to, you know, look. Why you look. Trying to get in the DMs, like, say. Say. Especially when you made it known that, you know, I'm single. Yeah. I'm a Christian girl. They play on that.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (33:38)

Oh, they do.

David Mann (33:38)

Oh, I'm looking for a nice.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (33:39)

They know this Christian girl that love the Lord.

Tamela Mann (33:42)

Yeah.

David Mann (33:42)

You look like the prime minister. And as Christians out here, you really gotta be ready for, you know, stuff that goes on. She has prison ministries that be writing her. The prison guys.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (33:54)

Oh, the prison boys. Oh, my goodness. They love our shows. That's all they watch in prison. I was at the Minnesota game. I had to sing the anthem. I walked across the street, and this guy had a mask on. He goes, fatima. And I was like, yeah. And he goes, man, I used to watch you every week in prison.

Tamela Mann (34:10)

I was like, what? I don't. Yes.

David Mann (34:12)

He's like, you believe? They talking about how they want to have the man. I'm like, let me tell you, you ain't going to. It's good, but you ain't finna get none of it. Oh, I'm not supposed to sell this ever.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (34:27)

This is a safe space.

David Mann (34:28)

You're good.

Tamela Mann (34:31)

My goodness.

David Mann (34:32)

You better just keep fantasizing.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (34:34)

Yes. Yes.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (34:35)

That's all you gotta make so funny. You mentioned that we deal with a lot in this industry. I know for me as a Christian woman navigating the industry, and I'm pretty new in this space, but I know that there are deal breakers and boundaries that I have as you guys have navigated it. What have been some. Some. Some deal breakers and some boundaries that you set for yourselves within the industry.

Tamela Mann (34:58)

Well, like me because of. Especially with being in gospel music and just trying to be an example. We're not perfect, but, you know, some. Some things like, have been presented to us like in a script. Like what they want us to curse. And I was like, that's not. Yeah, that's just not where I'm going. I can't say that for anyone else.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (35:18)

Yeah.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (35:19)

So you don't curse at all, Tim?

Tamela Mann (35:20)

Huh?

Crystal Renee Hayslett (35:20)

You don't say no curse words. That is so good.

Tamela Mann (35:23)

Nigga is my cousin.

David Mann (35:26)

That's.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (35:27)

That's my favorite word you would be.

Tamela Mann (35:31)

Tyler have tried to get. He was like, damn.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (35:33)

Just cussed him.

Tamela Mann (35:34)

You trying to tell me you did this?

David Mann (35:35)

You don't never cuss him out.

Tamela Mann (35:36)

Y' all ain't never cussed each other? After y' all got me, I was like, no. I was like, no, Tyler, we don't talk to each other like that.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (35:41)

That is beautiful.

Tamela Mann (35:42)

But when I was younger, between 18, 20, I had it bad. I had it bad. Cause you know, my mama was straight. Koji.

David Mann (35:54)

It was before 20. Cause I didn't ever leave. Cause that was a deal breaker for me.

Tamela Mann (35:57)

Why didn't do it around you?

David Mann (35:58)

I don't reason. I don't cuss is not cuz I'm so holy and all that. My mama used to cuss a lot, so I just never been a custom. That is so like, you would probably go be around me years and never hear me cuss.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (36:10)

That is amazing.

David Mann (36:10)

But. And so I didn't like ladies that. Just a lot of cussing.

Tamela Mann (36:15)

But I was good at it, though.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (36:18)

For them two years.

Tamela Mann (36:18)

I know how to put them together.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (36:20)

Listen.

Tamela Mann (36:21)

And I mean put them together. Right.

David Mann (36:22)

Did you not. Did you know how to fight?

Tamela Mann (36:24)

I didn't have to. I had brothers.

David Mann (36:26)

The answer is no.

Tamela Mann (36:28)

I didn't have to fight. You can't fight. Fight my battles.

David Mann (36:31)

You can sing, but you can't fight.

Tamela Mann (36:35)

But I. But I didn't. I just never was. I mean, after that.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (36:39)

Yeah.

Tamela Mann (36:40)

In our relationship now. I. I mean, I have said a couple words when my just talking to my kids, saying, they was like, mama, you don't know how. Just joking, like.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (36:50)

Yes, I do.

Tamela Mann (36:51)

Yes, I do.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (36:52)

I just don't.

Tamela Mann (36:53)

He was like, let me hear you. You know, that's so sad for somebody to just want you. Tyler Perry. Just want me to just. Come on, come on.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (37:04)

Yeah, give me one.

Tamela Mann (37:07)

I was like, no.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (37:08)

Yeah, mine. My boundary is nudity. Like, that's one thing I just won't like. There's certain body parts I'm not willing to show.

David Mann (37:15)

Yeah.

Tamela Mann (37:15)

That ain't for everybody to see.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (37:17)

Yeah, but I will cuss.

David Mann (37:18)

Yeah, look, you will cuss.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (37:21)

I will cuss. I got a cussing spirit I gotta work on.

Tamela Mann (37:25)

He's still working on it.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (37:26)

I'm still working. He's still working on me.

David Mann (37:27)

Well, now, that don't make me better than you. Cause I don't cuss. Let me tell you why.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (37:31)

Yeah, we all got our thing.

David Mann (37:32)

No, I will fight.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (37:34)

He said, but I will fight you.

David Mann (37:35)

I punch a nigga in the face.

Tamela Mann (37:36)

In a minute, he'll fight.

David Mann (37:38)

But I'm working on him.

Tamela Mann (37:39)

I had to pray for him.

David Mann (37:41)

The Lord is working on me too. See, just cause I don't do that, don't mean I don't have something.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (37:46)

Can we say that again? Yeah, because we. Look, I feel like our. The Christian community will judge you. We make certain sins worse than others.

David Mann (37:54)

Just because I don't.

Tamela Mann (37:54)

Sin is sin, that's all.

David Mann (37:56)

You ain't gonna go to jail for doing that. I can go to jail for mine. So. Right. So I've learned to just put these hands on in my pocket and just be like this.

Tamela Mann (38:06)

You know, this. I'll have to calm ourselves. You know, it's like. But you know when.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (38:10)

Yes.

Tamela Mann (38:10)

That's my thing is it's like some people, like, I just. Just can't stop. I said, yes, you can.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (38:14)

Yes, you can.

Tamela Mann (38:14)

Because you really know sometimes with certain places that you're at, you know, it don't even come.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (38:18)

It don't even come. Oh, you're right.

Tamela Mann (38:21)

But then there's certain places you step and you be like. And you know, you just. They all just come out easily.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (38:30)

They do, you know, when I say.

Tamela Mann (38:32)

So, it's like something that we all can work on, but that.

David Mann (38:36)

I wouldn't slap somebody that's like 6, 5 and 300 pounds. Like I would somebody who was 5, 11, maybe. No, I wouldn't. No, I would not.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (38:46)

Pick your battles.

David Mann (38:46)

You know when.

Tamela Mann (38:47)

That's right. That's right.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (38:49)

But that is good. You know what I love about you too? That you guys can laugh and be serious. I've seen you both working and focused, but I love how you guys can laugh. Are there moments you said sometimes he just do too much or two he.

Tamela Mann (39:00)

Do too much David. It's hard for me to be mad at him.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (39:03)

I can imagine.

Tamela Mann (39:04)

Cause he'll try to.

David Mann (39:05)

She can manage. She give.

Tamela Mann (39:07)

But I do. And I just want to go just.

David Mann (39:09)

I don't get mad at her, for the record.

Tamela Mann (39:11)

Yeah, right.

David Mann (39:12)

I don't get mad.

Tamela Mann (39:12)

They don't tell you you're lying. Just you straighten up. You straight up lying. Cause you do. I be telling myself, you do get mad at me. I know you get upset. You're not mad. But maybe you get upset with me because.

David Mann (39:27)

When do you hear me get mad? When did you see me get mad at you?

Tamela Mann (39:30)

Yes, you do. Because your eyes will get red and it's like you're kind of going to like us. I ain't saying nothing.

David Mann (39:36)

I'll just do like this. I'm not saying anything to you now. I'm nothing. But I'll never be like, no, you don't do that.

Tamela Mann (39:42)

But you just go into the calm, like, okay, I'm just collect yourself. But that's upset me.

David Mann (39:48)

No speak at the end.

Tamela Mann (39:49)

Come on, let me hear you say it. I'm doing like you be doing me. Let me hear you say it.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (39:53)

Yeah, you be upset.

David Mann (39:55)

Never get mad at you. No, you do.

Tamela Mann (39:59)

But I do get upset with. With him. And I'll just be like, oh, she.

David Mann (40:02)

Can let me have it.

Tamela Mann (40:03)

I really like my me time when that.

David Mann (40:05)

When that menopause kicked in. We riding in the car one time.

Tamela Mann (40:09)

And listen, don't be trying to come and throw my shark.

David Mann (40:12)

I'm not trying. We riding the car and you know the whole yelling thing. You going to yell at me? We can't talk. We're not going to communicate. This is not the way we communicate. Yeah, well, she going out if you going to yell at me. We not talking. And why are you yelling? She gave the dumbest excuse ever known to man.

Tamela Mann (40:32)

It was not dumb.

David Mann (40:33)

It was dear. She said, I'm yelling at you cause I'm a soprano. She knew at the time that was a dumb answer. She gonna stop now.

Tamela Mann (40:47)

You knew it was normal. I meant it, though. I meant it.

David Mann (40:52)

You can just yell loud.

Tamela Mann (40:53)

I just got. Yeah, I was at the top. I was at the top of my ring.

David Mann (40:57)

Why are you yelling?

Crystal Renee Hayslett (40:59)

Cause I was loud.

Tamela Mann (41:01)

I can give you louder.

David Mann (41:02)

Well, I'm gonna be quiet. Cause I'm a tenor.

Tamela Mann (41:04)

Hello.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (41:05)

Yes.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (41:06)

That is so funny.

Tamela Mann (41:07)

We have some good times, though. You know, our journey, we've had rough patches, but our journey, he's made me happier than he's made me sad. So it's really been. It's been a wonderful ride. Know we are work in progress and. But our job and our call is to. We know, is to hang tight, hang together, and to just show other people that we can do this thing right. We know that's what we're called to do. And it's like, that is what we're working toward. To not be perfect, but to just give encouragement that it can happen and you can be happy in this.

David Mann (41:46)

And even when those times come, how to recover. Because we've had to recover. There's been some times when it's like, wow, this is shaky.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (41:55)

I want to talk about that. Because a lot of times I feel like we fantasize and glamorize relationships like yours where we're like, oh, my God, that's exactly what I want. But we don't know how to recover when things get. Because it's going to happen, things are going to get shaky. Can you, like, share a moment where you had to really recover from something?

Tamela Mann (42:14)

Our one relationship that. Well, one point that we talk about is one of our daughters. We didn't find out that she was ours till she was five years old.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (42:24)

Wow.

Tamela Mann (42:25)

So when David.

David Mann (42:26)

That was a really hard point in our.

Tamela Mann (42:29)

Rough point that I made. But we had been married, but I knew of the girl.

David Mann (42:33)

Let me get. Cause we shared this on the Breakfast Club. Somebody say he cheated on her. This was before we got married. Because, you know, people go back and only go to some part of the.

Tamela Mann (42:43)

We made our commitment.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (42:44)

Yes.

Tamela Mann (42:45)

So it is so funny. But that was really the hardest because our relationship, we're a blended family. We have two together. He had two. He say from a previous argument.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (42:55)

Okay. From previous arguments.

David Mann (42:56)

But it wasn't no argument.

Tamela Mann (42:57)

And we raised my niece. So when he came and told me, because they came and served him papers, that he had to go to court. Court and all that kind of stuff. So when he found out, he told me. And I was like, I don't know. Because the. You know, the first baby, we. We've been best friends. We started out friends.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (43:16)

Yeah.

Tamela Mann (43:16)

I was there at the hospital with him when she was born. I mean, stayed the whole 21 hours with him.

David Mann (43:22)

Now, Mike, she wasn't my girlfriend. She was my friend who was there, just happened to be with Me, people got it so mixed up in.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (43:32)

And they'll do that.

David Mann (43:32)

Just go, I tell you, go read the book, us against the world, and you'll get all of this story, all the, each part.

Tamela Mann (43:38)

But the thing is, is I, I, I, I loved him. I sit there as a friend. And then once we got married and he, you know, came with the news about the, the second daughter, I was like, I don't know if I can do this.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (43:51)

Yeah.

Tamela Mann (43:52)

And, you know, the mama was not the best. I'm just going to be honest. We wasn't in, like, the best of friends. Even though I knew her, even before he knew her, I knew her.

David Mann (44:02)

And it's because we were all young, trying to figure out all of this.

Tamela Mann (44:06)

Yeah. I lived in the same neighborhoods. It's just, it's just funny how life goes, how even you can be knowing the same people and not even know that these. That person was connected.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (44:16)

Yes, absolutely.

Tamela Mann (44:17)

So that's kind of how that happened. But it was really rough for me to accept her at the moment.

David Mann (44:25)

And that's because I felt like when you back up. Her deal was when she got married, she said, I want a guy. Don't have any kids. And then.

Tamela Mann (44:34)

Because I didn't want to have to be dealing with that.

David Mann (44:36)

Yeah. And so here I had one.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (44:39)

Yeah.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (44:39)

That she was.

Tamela Mann (44:40)

Yes.

David Mann (44:40)

And then she goes, she go to work and come back home with another one from work.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (44:45)

Come on, now.

David Mann (44:47)

I got us another. While you was at work, she already big and potty trained. You know, like, what, what are you.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (44:55)

What are you talking about?

David Mann (44:56)

Yeah, and just that was a moment in our marriage where it's like, one of my biggest fears in life. One of my biggest fears in life is losing my family. And so for her to say, I'm not gonna be able to do this. Sent into, like, a tailspin of like, oh, my God.

Tamela Mann (45:13)

He said, you just gonna leave?

David Mann (45:15)

You gonna just leave me?

Tamela Mann (45:17)

So. And then he sit me down and he started talking to me, and he was like, I just want you to know that it's always. He did the thing like this where he separated. He was like, it's me and you, and then it's them. It's everybody else. So he said, I'll never put you out there where you have to make the decision or I'm gonna make the decision. It's them over you. He says, always gonna be us and then them.

David Mann (45:41)

Yeah, I love it.

Tamela Mann (45:42)

So. And that by him reassuring me, just for those, the listeners and watchers, he reassured me that I was his number One.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (45:52)

Yeah.

Tamela Mann (45:52)

And that has always gave me comfort. And he's always done that.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (45:56)

Yeah.

Tamela Mann (45:56)

He's never showed me anything different. He's the same. Love has always been there. And if anything went down with the girls and their moms, he was like, you, you gotta talk to me, you need to talk to Tam.

David Mann (46:07)

Yeah.

Tamela Mann (46:07)

I said, you know, it's like he was all. We were involved in every step.

David Mann (46:11)

And just so people don't get it twisted, because I know some people I, I read in the comments got it twisted. It's not that my daughters were, you know.

Tamela Mann (46:18)

No. Because that was. We were. I was fine with the kids because the kid didn't ask to be here.

David Mann (46:22)

I know the order of this because my daughters and they're going in with their own families. And if we haven't been a solid force and been a force that were together, then that thing would have broken up and guess who would have been by themselves? Daddy. So I had to make sure we were solid before we could even deal with those situations.

Tamela Mann (46:40)

Absolutely.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (46:41)

Yeah.

David Mann (46:41)

So, yeah. So it wasn't that my daughters, you know, oh, he picked this. He picked over his kids. No, I just made sure. I know the divine order that God wanted. I made sure that we were together then I could.

Tamela Mann (46:52)

And he handled it in that order. So that's one of the. A great hard part. A hard one for us. And even when it came to. If I could say this quickly, I know we're moving when it came to the parents. Cuz sometimes when a lady, When a girl marries a man and then he has his mom, sometimes with the mom, she feels like you taking her son. So he had to even establish that.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (47:18)

Yeah, that's a real thing that happens.

Tamela Mann (47:20)

It happens in real life. And he stood in place. He was like, look, mama, you were the first woman in my life. She's the last lady in my life. So it's like he has really made everybody understand where our positioning is.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (47:33)

Yes.

Tamela Mann (47:33)

Without picking and choosing and without you.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (47:36)

Having to do it.

Tamela Mann (47:36)

Yeah.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (47:37)

A lot of times women can feel alone in that.

Tamela Mann (47:38)

Yeah.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (47:39)

When a man doesn't step up and say, hey, she's my number one, this is my priority, everything else has to fall in line.

Tamela Mann (47:45)

I'm gonna be there to take care of you.

David Mann (47:46)

Yeah. That is something really with me. And that we have. We got to bridge that gap.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (47:52)

Yeah.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (47:53)

Drop that right there and address. Look right there in a dress to.

David Mann (47:55)

Bridge the gap and address. Address it. It's not going anywhere. She's not going anywhere. Mommy's not going anywhere. So Like, I. Like she said. I literally said, listen, both of y'.

Tamela Mann (48:05)

All.

David Mann (48:05)

Don't you say nothing to me about her. Don't you say nothing to me. She's the first woman that was in my life, and this is gonna be the last woman in my life. Y' all gonna have to figure this out.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (48:14)

Yeah.

David Mann (48:14)

Now fight it out. No. That's what I said. No. And. And they kind of like, wow, okay, let's figure this out.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (48:24)

Yeah.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (48:25)

Cause neither one of them wanted to lose you either. That's real.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (48:28)

Yeah.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (48:29)

I love that. Now you guys are together a lot, and I like my space. So I want to know, how do y' all find time? Because you're always together. Do you need alone time? Or y' all just love being around each other?

Tamela Mann (48:40)

She needs to. Yeah. Cause I'll go get my nails done. Or I just go sit. Go shopping or something.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (48:46)

Yeah.

Tamela Mann (48:46)

But I do. I have to have it. He says he doesn't. Cause David is a homebody.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (48:51)

Okay.

Tamela Mann (48:51)

But me, I'll take off. Right. He was like, where you going? I'm going to do this, and I'm going to do that.

David Mann (48:55)

I'll be right here when I'll be back.

Tamela Mann (48:57)

And he'll say, I'll be here when you get back. I know that. So I do do the separation thing for a minute to just go do my nails, feet, you know, hair.

David Mann (49:07)

I'm a lot. I'm a lot. Sometimes he can be. But, I mean, you can be a lot, too. I'm gone. No, you ain't gonna.

Tamela Mann (49:15)

But it's not. But it's to the degree of not. It's not overwhelming, but I just want that time just for myself to gather my own thoughts, even. Sometimes I'll go maybe sit in the tub for two hours. It's just. I just go in there. I want it dark, and I just want it to be me.

David Mann (49:33)

But we have to hear from each.

Tamela Mann (49:34)

Other every two hours.

David Mann (49:36)

Every two hours.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (49:36)

Oh, that's good.

David Mann (49:37)

Yeah. I have to know that you're good. Okay. You good? All right. Goodbye. Go and do your thing.

Tamela Mann (49:42)

And if I miss it, he be.

David Mann (49:43)

Like, what's the problem?

Crystal Renee Hayslett (49:45)

Two hours check in.

David Mann (49:46)

It's just to know that you're good, you're okay. Are you all right?

Crystal Renee Hayslett (49:50)

Listen, I'm with that because I do feel like sometimes, like, if I'm dating someone and they don't check on me, it's like, at least just know that I'm okay. Like, if we haven't gotten to talk because we're busy at the end of the. In the beginning of the day and at the end of the day, at least, like, make sure I'm good. Because anything can happen.

David Mann (50:05)

You just never know.

Tamela Mann (50:07)

I like that everywhere, you know, depending on. You know, to make sure in case of something happen, I know where to start looking for you, or I know where she said she was gonna be. So she should be in this vicinity.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (50:18)

Yes.

David Mann (50:18)

Like, for me, I don't. And I just recently started doing the myself time when I went to therapy. That was one of the first things he said, One of the first things that you have to learn to do. And when he said this, I was like, what? He said, you gotta learn to be more selfish. And I was like, huh?

Tamela Mann (50:35)

Selfish?

David Mann (50:35)

I say selfish? I can't be selfish. He said, you got to learn to be more selfish. You've given yourself to so many people. You don't have anything else to give. And I was like, well, how am I gonna be selfish? And you know the weirdest thing? I went to chick fil a that day, and I used to get my food to go, so I can go and I sit at the table and I call her like a little kid. I'm eating by myself.

Tamela Mann (51:00)

Like, I did it. I'm eating alone.

David Mann (51:02)

I'm growing up, and it's just. And it's just I had to learn. We bought this place, and I went out and spent the night by myself. Now that's a big thing. I've never stayed by myself.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (51:15)

Wow.

David Mann (51:15)

And so it was a big thing for me to go out and spend the night by myself. And I was like, we bought a.

Tamela Mann (51:19)

Ranch, so it's like his getaway place.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (51:22)

That's amazing.

David Mann (51:23)

And I was like, okay, that's enough. You need to come bring this warm flesh back by daddy. Come on. Bring me that. Because I can't do it. I ain't do it too long.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (51:32)

Yeah.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (51:32)

That's so good. You touched on therapy and mental health is something I love to talk about. I just started therapy. I started during COVID and I wasn't taking it serious because I didn't really trust the therapist. So I wasn't being honest with her. So I was like, this isn't working. And then I tried it again, and I started opening up, and it really started helping.

Tamela Mann (51:51)

Was it another therapist?

Crystal Renee Hayslett (51:52)

It's the second. It was a different lady.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (51:53)

Yeah.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (51:54)

That really made me feel safe.

Tamela Mann (51:55)

And I think that's what a lot of people. We need to realize that you may not be comfortable with that person after you get there. You don't have to Stay.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (52:03)

Yeah.

Tamela Mann (52:04)

You can. You can pick and choose where you want to go.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (52:06)

Yeah. It's like dating, right?

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (52:07)

Yeah.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (52:08)

Without all the. You know what I'm saying? But it is very intimate because you're, like, telling them everything. But, like, at what point did you realize, you know, I do need to go talk to somebody? Because a lot of us, especially as we get older, we get more stuck in our ways. We don't feel like we need to talk to anyone. We feel like we got it figured out at one point. Were you guys like, you know what? I do need to talk to somebody.

David Mann (52:25)

I think for me, when I found myself and after Covid, I had given so much of myself, and mine wasn't the usual suspects. The reason I found myself usual suspects is finances and your marriage is in trouble. We were in the strongest place that we had been, but I had given so much. I made sure she was good, make sure the kids was good, make sure my mom, make sure everybody was around me was good. And I'll sit and looked one day and said, what have you done for you? And I, you know, when you have to start, like, well, you know, I bought a truck. It's like, you didn't do nothing for yourself. And so I went and sat, and, like, I say, he was just like, you have got to take care of you. And I finally broke down and told her. I said, look, I think I'm depressed.

Tamela Mann (53:11)

Wow.

David Mann (53:12)

You notice I'm sitting in my office, and I couldn't even create. Usually I'm creating something for something else and just putting, you know, and I couldn't. In my brain. I was just blocked. And I finally told her, and it was just like, first of all, telling her was a big relief.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (53:29)

Yeah.

David Mann (53:30)

And it was just like.

Tamela Mann (53:31)

But it was crushing for me.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (53:32)

I can imagine.

Tamela Mann (53:34)

Cause I was like, the reason why I say crushing, guys is I didn't notice it. I didn't see it. It's like I kept asking him, is he okay? And David's answer is, I gave the.

David Mann (53:44)

Generic answer, I'm cool. I'm good.

Tamela Mann (53:45)

I'm cool. I'm good. Cool and good. So I'm like, you sure? Yeah, I'm good. So it's like I said I was asking you, and you kept telling me you were good. I say, why not just tell me then?

David Mann (53:58)

But he was like, because that's the answer Superman gives.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (54:00)

Yes, I'm good.

Tamela Mann (54:01)

I'm good.

David Mann (54:02)

I got the cape on. I'm good. Just leave my cape alone and let me do what I do, you know?

Tamela Mann (54:07)

And Then I didn't see that. That I didn't see through, that he wasn't okay.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (54:11)

Yeah.

Tamela Mann (54:12)

So that made me really weep. And really just. I just started asking for forgiveness because I was like, I missed it. And I mean, you know, God forbid, you just did something to yourself, right? And I didn't. I didn't see it. So my thing is, now, y', all, if somebody or you feel like they're not in that place, just don't be afraid to just go back and double check. Go back and double check on that person because they really may need to get that hug or to just have you just sit there and just listen to me. That's all right.

David Mann (54:48)

You will be surprised. What a hug, just like a minute will do.

Tamela Mann (54:54)

We do that really, like, stand and just hold.

David Mann (54:57)

Don't say anything. It's just a hug. And I told her, I'm hugging you. That makes me choke up. I'm hugging you with my heart. And once I started doing that, I'm just like, hey, you'll let me cry. Yeah.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (55:10)

Yeah.

David Mann (55:10)

I sit and I actually hug. And doing that, you will. You will be surprised.

Tamela Mann (55:16)

It's like. It's like if. It's like the weight falls off your body, it's like you can actually feel the weight. It's not. You know how sometimes, if you get a good cry out.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (55:24)

Yes.

Tamela Mann (55:25)

It's like you feel 10 pounds lighter. A hug does the same thing. And sometimes the. Some people be like, I don't want one. But they really do.

David Mann (55:33)

They really do need it.

Tamela Mann (55:34)

They do.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (55:35)

They need it. Yeah, they do need it.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (55:36)

Yeah. My therapist tells me, she goes, when you get in the shower in the morning, she's like, take time to hug yourself. Oh, that's good.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (55:43)

Yeah, I like that.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (55:44)

Because she's like, a lot of times we don't love on ourselves because we're so busy loving on everyone else. So that's something. I try to take a few minutes or not a minute, but like, a few moments to really just sit in. Like, I love you. Yeah, you're good.

David Mann (55:57)

I love missing me. And it's just. That's. You know, once I realized and just found a safe space. And my therapist, I often ask him, I pay you to talk to me like this.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (56:11)

Right?

David Mann (56:11)

Why you gotta talk to me like this? I'm paying you. Yeah, but you gotta have a therapist that's gonna be honest with you.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (56:17)

Absolutely.

David Mann (56:18)

You know, he was telling me, part of your family's problem is you. And I was like, I ain't coming back.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (56:25)

He's like, I don't wanna hear this. Yeah.

David Mann (56:27)

I ain't gotta pay to hear this. But he was right.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (56:29)

Yeah.

David Mann (56:30)

Part of the problem with me is I'm a fixer. Sometimes she don't need me to fix it. She just need me to listen.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (56:37)

Yeah.

David Mann (56:38)

But she has to be careful what she says out of her mouth. Because the minute she says it, I'm gone.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (56:45)

Yeah, I mean, like.

Tamela Mann (56:46)

Well, I just was mentioning some ideas. Not necessarily make it come to fruition. Not too fast.

David Mann (56:52)

You didn't want a new car.

Tamela Mann (56:53)

Yeah, I take it back.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (56:55)

I take it back.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (56:57)

I want it.

Tamela Mann (56:58)

That ain't what I meant, but I just. But I thank God for him. And that's, I think, also what really gripped my heart is. Cause David notices I'm not gonna cry. Everything about me. Everything. And I miss it so much. I just. I keep saying, okay, I'm gonna pay attention. He can go shave and he'll come back. He say, you notice something? Be like, no.

David Mann (57:28)

You mean to tell me you don't see I shave that full beard all the time?

Tamela Mann (57:34)

You messed up again. But he notices everything. I could change an eyebrow, he'd be.

David Mann (57:43)

Like, oh, oh, I can see why you drew that on there. You kind of put a swerve on it this time.

Tamela Mann (57:47)

But he knows.

David Mann (57:48)

Is that new perfume.

Tamela Mann (57:49)

He knows everything. And it's like I said, it's just because you knows. I know, but it's just. It hurts my feelings that you don't know, because I'm not as alert as him. Yeah, but I'm. Like I said, doc, maybe it's just not my character.

David Mann (58:07)

No, it's not.

Tamela Mann (58:08)

But I'm just trying to do. I think when it comes to relationships, y', all, we just need to always do better with each other. And I know that that's something that I'm working on. Even with communicating, you know, he's always been the great and over communicator, and I haven't always been, but this last couple years. Oh, boy. Once she kicked in, you kind of loquacious.

David Mann (58:31)

I said, you're very loquacious. Go look it up.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (58:34)

Look up.

David Mann (58:34)

Loquacious.

Tamela Mann (58:35)

It means very talking. So I was like, I saw. I am today. Huh? But I'm just trying. I wanna. Like I told him, even when it comes to the artistry, and even when it comes to being his wife and his friend, I just want to do better. I just want to be better as a. You know, as a friend, as a mother, aunt. I just. I know we can't catch everything with Everybody. But I just want to do better. That's why when it to comes comes to being sweet, help me to be good Lord. And I just to be able to help somebody, you know, just whenever that time is, to be able to catch it.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (59:11)

Yeah, I love that.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (59:12)

Guys, thank you so much for coming to sit with me.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (59:15)

Thank you for having me.

Tamela Mann (59:16)

For sitting with us.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (59:17)

No, for sure.

David Mann (59:18)

I'm sorry she was so loquacious.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (59:20)

No. Before I let you go, I know you guys have some things coming up live. Breathe. Fight is out now. You also have Mama Man's Kids Kitchen. Is there anything else we can talk about?

Tamela Mann (59:30)

My man's kitchen is on YouTube. Our man TV channel, guys. And you can go to tamelaman.com for the actual the shapewear. And I also have it where you can get the CD there. So if you want a physical copy, tamelaman.com go check us out, y'.

Interjecting Speaker (likely David Mann or Crystal) (59:45)

All.

Tamela Mann (59:45)

I promise you this album. I know you may love Take me to the King, but it's some stuff on here that I promise you that'll be right there with you.

David Mann (59:55)

Listen to the power of Jesus. Listen to the power. The song power of Jesus gets me every time.

Tamela Mann (60:00)

And this other song is called you deserve to win. Yeah, deserve to win. Quit fighting yourself and thinking that you're not good enough and that you don't deserve it because you deserve to win. If you put the time in, you don't put the work in. You deserve to have some good things. You deserve to have peace of mind in your heart, your spirit, and your body. So you deserve to win. You deserve it.

David Mann (60:24)

God bless you.

Tamela Mann (60:24)

God bless you.

David Mann (60:25)

Love more, judge less.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (60:26)

Thank you. I love y'.

Tamela Mann (60:28)

All.

Crystal Renee Hayslett (60:28)

Thank you so much. David and Tamlin never disappoint when it comes to dropping gems. One thing they broke down that really resonated was when they were talking about their relationship and when they were having troubles, David put his fingers up and he said, tam, when it comes to us, it's us and then everyone else. And I think that is so poignant in relationships that when you are together and it seems like everything is coming against you, you have to put the two of you first. Time flies when you're having fun, and it certainly flew by today. Thank you guys so much for being a part of such an important and encouraging conversation today. You can follow me on all social media media platforms. OVCHRYSTAL RENEE and you can follow our show at KeepItPositive. Sweetie, if you want to write into our positive outcomes listener letter, you can send us an email to keepitpositsweetiemail.com in the meantime, in between time, you know what to do. Keep it positive, sweeties. I'll see you next time.

Tamela Mann (61:37)

Sa.