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Chris Renee Hazel
Calling all my sweeties to the forefront, I'm your host, Chris Renee Hazel, and this is the Keep It Positive Sweetie Show. Hey, sweeties. I am so happy that you are back with me for another episode. And while I have you here, I want you to lean in real quickly. Is this thing on? Just real quick, I have a question for you. What would you do if you knew that you could not fail? Go ahead, get your journal and write that vision and go ahead and make it plain, because it's just as simple as that. Our guest today is my sister, y'. All. She is a wife, a glowing mommy, and an actress and an entrepreneur. You might know her from, I don't know, a show named Sistas. Playing a character named Andy Barnes. Kiss family, please welcome our sister, KJ Smith Black.
KJ Smith Black
Hey, Crystal. Hey, girl.
Chris Renee Hazel
Hey, girl. Hey. I'm so happy to have you here today.
KJ Smith Black
I'm happy to be here.
Chris Renee Hazel
Good.
KJ Smith Black
You look good.
Chris Renee Hazel
You know, we like to make it feel like home here.
KJ Smith Black
Yes, it does.
Chris Renee Hazel
Thank you. How are you feeling?
KJ Smith Black
I feel good. I feel good. I'm really excited and energized.
Chris Renee Hazel
Good. I feel that. I feel it. When you walked in, you don't look like you're. What month are you in now?
KJ Smith Black
I'm going into my seventh month. Yes.
Chris Renee Hazel
Oh, my goodness.
KJ Smith Black
In two days, it'll be seven months.
Chris Renee Hazel
Two days. You look amazing. I was telling you when you walked in, I said, I hope that if I ever get pregnant, I. That I wear just. You're all belly. You know, some people, I feel like I'm gonna blow up in the face.
KJ Smith Black
My arms, everything you want. You know why? Because you train your fit. You know what I mean? It's all gonna go where it's supposed to go.
Chris Renee Hazel
I like that. Yeah, because it definitely went where it's supposed to go.
KJ Smith Black
No, I receive that.
Chris Renee Hazel
I receive that.
KJ Smith Black
And also, I'm trying to honor my body and everything that's happening. Like, it's so much change. I'm just like. Whatever happens, I'm allowing. I'm not about to fight with this. I'm literally changing every day. It's a new something, a new bump, a new rash, a new something. And I'm just like, this is a part of creating life, and that's cool.
Chris Renee Hazel
It is. Yeah. Yeah. I love that you're adapting to it and you're owning it. Yeah. I love that. The last time I saw you, we were filming Sisters, and it felt like overnight. Like, when you first came, it was just like a little bump and we were able to hide It. And then you came back over the weekend. We were like, what happened?
KJ Smith Black
And I was like, oh, yes, I'm ready. Action. Let's go.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes. That was crazy. But watching you do that, kj, was so inspiring because you are like, you're our girl. Like, you're the one that. You're everywhere on the show. You know, a lot of us, like, get time off. KJ does not get time off. Like, she's at everybody's house. She's handling. Putting fires out for everyone. So to see you handle it with so much grace, it inspired me, because a lot of times I think I make an excuse. Well, I don't have time to get pregnant. But seeing you do it out there was a little. The little part of me was like, I could do this. You can do it. You really inspired me.
KJ Smith Black
I received that because I honestly, I felt the same way. I was like, I don't have time. Where is the time? What people don't see is in between us shooting our show, we have our own endeavors. We're entrepreneurs. We are doing life as well. And so it's like we're creating outside of being on set.
Chris Renee Hazel
Right.
KJ Smith Black
And so I felt the same way. I felt like I don't have time or I'm not equipped or I don't know what I'm doing. I had a lot of doubt before sky and I decided to get pregnant. And, you know, I'm telling all my friends, I. I'm. I'm trying to recruit. Okay. I'm starting a recruiting program, and I need you to be on my list because you, of all people, can do it. I've seen you do so, so many amazing things, and you absolutely can do it.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah. I feel like I'm a mom to a lot of people.
KJ Smith Black
You are now. Now that I had to fix, because I am, too. And I've had to transmute that energy and kind of recall my energy.
Chris Renee Hazel
Wow.
KJ Smith Black
From mothering people, mostly adults.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
And I've had to recall a lot of energy, and that doesn't really bode well with some people, but I had to do it because I'm like, I have to do this thing. This is the most important thing in my life.
Chris Renee Hazel
Absolutely. Absolutely. What were some of the challenges that you faced during filming? And this is a new era that you walking in.
KJ Smith Black
My biggest bout was acid reflux, motion sickness, just gastrointestinal issues, wanting to purge in the middle of a scene, or, you know, clothes being, you know, On Monday, I'll be a certain size, and then by Wednesday, I'm a different size.
Chris Renee Hazel
Remember that one outfit?
KJ Smith Black
Yeah. I had to unzip. I'm behind my desk, y'. All. There are scenes where I'm literally behind my desk with my pants unzipped because the clothes no longer fit.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah, you're growing.
KJ Smith Black
Absolutely. And I think having the crew that we work with made it easier because we're with people we trust with people we've been working with forever. So everyone was like, it's okay. You need more water? Do you need a moment? Do you need. You know, people were helping me out. We had that scene where I had to lay on the ground.
Chris Renee Hazel
Oh, my.
KJ Smith Black
Yes.
Chris Renee Hazel
I was like, we did that like eight times. Eight times.
KJ Smith Black
And I was like. And all, you know, the men came and they helped me. And Miyoung, she was a part of the Help me lay down and everybody was helping me get up. So I think being with our family made it easier. But the physical challenges, there was nothing really I can do about it, but try to get, you know, we don't get sleep.
Chris Renee Hazel
We don't get sleep.
KJ Smith Black
And so I was really concerned a lot because with this pregnancy, it's a high risk pregnancy. It's a geriatric pregnancy. And so for me, I was on edge while we were shooting because I'm not sleeping eight hours and they recommend 10 to 12.
Chris Renee Hazel
What?
KJ Smith Black
And I'm not even sleeping eight. So for me, I'm going to work and I'm a little worried, but I had to kind of release that. But I'm worried because they're telling me that sleep is the most important thing for this time. So there was a little bit of concern, but mostly it was the physical. My own physical things. But our team made it a lot easier.
Chris Renee Hazel
Absolutely.
KJ Smith Black
Because they're so nice.
Chris Renee Hazel
They are. It's really like one big happy family at tps.
KJ Smith Black
It really is.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah. I can imagine that we've had candid conversations about just. And you've talked about it as well, about the doctors telling you you were infertile. In this journey of even knowing if you could have children, can you share with us some of the things that you've been through to get to this?
KJ Smith Black
Yes. And I. I really. I'm so happy that you have me here because I watch your show and I imagine that other women who are like me watch your show, and these are other women who feel the way I feel, which is it's too late for me or my doctor told me I can't. And as a woman who. I have pcos, I have fibroids, I'M later on in life. And so every doctor I went to were like, ah, you have fibroids on the uterus. You know, you're going to have an issue with getting pregnant, or you may not be able to get pregnant. You have pcos. The number one symptom of PCOS is infertility. And then I started going to the fertility clinic before my husband and I even started trying to get pregnant.
Chris Renee Hazel
Really? Yes.
KJ Smith Black
Because I'm a type A person, so I'm like, I have to plan an advance. I have to make sure that we can do this before we even start.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
We go to the doctor, we test him, we test me. He's like, you know, you have plenty eggs. It's fine.
Chris Renee Hazel
Wow.
KJ Smith Black
But you have this fibroid, and on the paperwork, it says infertile. On the paperwork, it says infertile. My husband was fine. Yeah, my husband was fine. Hey, I use my hands. My husband was absolutely fine. So he was fine. But. But the doctor, he said, you have plenty of eggs. He said, but you have this fibroid. And he said, it looks as if you would be infertile. He said, let's get you in here for ivf. And so this was like, November, January this year. January this year. We had a schedule because I was like, I'm going to do after holidays. I was told that it causes, like, hormonal changes, et cetera. And so I was like, oh, I'm going to do my IVF journey after the holidays. Now, mind you, we hadn't even started, like, really trying and committing to trying.
Chris Renee Hazel
Right.
KJ Smith Black
And over the summer, I had committed to healing my pcos because.
Chris Renee Hazel
How did you do that? I know there's a lot of black women that do that.
KJ Smith Black
Absolutely. Oh, yes. Oh, please.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes. Teach us.
KJ Smith Black
I was going to say. I was like, literally, I want to write down everything I did. I started taking a supplement called Inositol. And this is just for me.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
I started taking a supplement called Inositol. I started taking a lot more magnesium. I started incorporating that into my diet. And for black women, we have to release the stress.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
We cannot be everyone's superhero. I went completely dark this summer. I was. I went dark this summer. I said, listen, I'm off the grid. Do not call me. Do not ask me to go to any event. No red carpet, no work. I don't want to do any of that because I have to heal my body. Apparently, I had been operating with high cortisol levels for I don't even know how many years. So I've been operating at fight or flight for years.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
For years. Didn't even know I'm any little thing. I'm high strung.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
And that has all changed because of the supplements that I started to incorporate in my, in my life and in my diet. And I'm not going to hold you now. The TikTok girlies were right.
Chris Renee Hazel
The TikTok.
KJ Smith Black
TikTok girlies were right. I went on TikTok and I started, I started taking wild yam, using wild yam cream, putting it on my wrist, putting it on the top of my belly. And that also shifted. I started having easier cycles.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
The facial hair, those, those types of issues started to go away. Listen, I'm keeping 100. Keep it positive, sweetie. We're going to keep it 100 and positive.
Chris Renee Hazel
There we go.
KJ Smith Black
And so that I spent the whole summer just trying to heal my body, trying to heal myself, trying to heal my mind. And it worked. And then I honestly didn't even feel prepared to have a baby before that. And, and then I started overthinking about, oh, now it's time to have a baby. Now it's time to have a baby. Now it's time to have a baby. I'm going to call a fertility doctor. Like just going. Reverting back to high strung.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
So, but yeah, that, that's, that's largely a part of my journey. January 19th, we found out that we were pregnant.
Chris Renee Hazel
Now what was that moment like?
KJ Smith Black
Oh my God, I gotta send you the video.
Chris Renee Hazel
Oh, please, I gotta send you the video. Yes.
KJ Smith Black
I, I had just took my weave down. I just took my hair out and you know, I gotta be cute.
Chris Renee Hazel
Okay.
KJ Smith Black
I'm wearing my natural hair now lately. But you know, I used to be a weave girl. Okay.
Chris Renee Hazel
I used to be a wig. Now, honey, listen.
KJ Smith Black
So I had just took my weave out and I was like, oh, I'm gonna wash my hair. It's gonna be a self care day. And I had gotten in the habit of taking a pregnancy test because we started in November. So I got in the habit of, you know, taking a pregnancy test. And so I was like on the phone with my cousins. There's eight of us on a call every Sunday. I'm on the phone with my cousins for six to eight hours.
Chris Renee Hazel
Wow.
KJ Smith Black
They're mine. They're my besties. And so I'm on the phone with them casually and you know, the phone's on mute. We do this all the time. So I have them on my headphones. I take a pregnancy test and yeah, I'm in the shower washing my hair, and I said, oh, wait, I gotta check my test. And I had gotten into the habit of just being casual about it because they told me it was gonna take six months to get pregnant. I was planning on starting. I had a plan, friend. I had a plan, okay? I had a plan on getting started in November so that by the time we had finished filming, I would be pregnant. And I can just have time.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
Yes, exactly. I would have time off.
Chris Renee Hazel
God said, make a plan.
KJ Smith Black
God said, listen.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
And so I was washing my hair, and I casually looked. I kind of just looked out of the shower and looked at the pregnancy test. Because it's a certain time. I think you're supposed to. And don't quote me on this. I think you're supposed to look at it, like, after five minutes, but not after, like, 10, okay? So, like, at five minutes, I was kind of like, oh, wait, I gotta check my pregnancy test. So I looked and he said, positive. And I went, whoa. And mind you, I got my cousin on speakerphone in the shower, and I go. I just scream because I'm dramatic. And my cousin's like, what? You know, because my cousin's riding for me. They're like, what happened? What's going on? Do I need to come up there? What's happening? I'm in LA at the time, right? They're all in Florida, right? Where are you gonna go?
Chris Renee Hazel
And how fast are you gonna get?
KJ Smith Black
How are you gonna get here? What are you gonna do? What? Excuse me. So I'm screaming to the top of my lungs, and they're like, what is happening? I get out of the shower, mind you, my hair is wet. I still got the shampoo in my hair. My body's wet, my fingers are wet. I'm trying to turn the camera on to them, put on a robe, show them the pregnancy test, because I cannot even talk.
Chris Renee Hazel
Oh, my God.
KJ Smith Black
So between crying and screaming and my cousins panicking.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
Because I've put them in that state of being. I am wet all over. And I am just, like, fumbling with the phone. It was something out of a movie. I can't even make it up. And I finally, like, dry my hands, show them the pregnancy test. They all have kids. Most of them. A lot of them have kids. And they were like, oh, my God. So we're on the phone celebrating.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
Sky just got back. He was working. I'm sorry.
Chris Renee Hazel
This is a great surprise. No, this is good.
KJ Smith Black
He was working. He had just got back from. From all the Queens of men. So he was in the guest bedroom taking a nap. So that wouldn't bother him because I was in the primary suite.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
And so I'm screaming. They're like, you gotta tell Sky. And I was like, no, I have a plan. I have a plan. Where's my videographer?
Chris Renee Hazel
I need a place.
KJ Smith Black
Where is Dragon? I'm like, you wonder where my videographer is? I'm like, I need to document this moment.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes, girl.
KJ Smith Black
But God.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
The whole situation was. But God.
Chris Renee Hazel
Wow.
KJ Smith Black
He's in the bed, sleep. Don't know nothing. Didn't hear a peep. I'm screaming, this guy's a hard sleeper. Celebrating with my family. And we come up with this little plan where I tell him to get the. Get something out of the oven. And I'm like, oh, no, it's not a bun. This is it. I have a bun in this oven. And it's like, you know.
Chris Renee Hazel
That's cute.
KJ Smith Black
Yeah. So, you know, I took a couple tests before I showed him. Just in case.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
Just make sure. Let me take some extra. Extra test.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
Just in case they were all positive. Like, super positive. And so he's. You know, he's always wanted to be a father, so he was elated.
Chris Renee Hazel
I can imagine.
KJ Smith Black
It was amazing.
Chris Renee Hazel
I know. It was.
KJ Smith Black
It was fantastic. I'm sorry for the long one.
Chris Renee Hazel
No, no, I asked. I wanted to be taken to that moment. And you took us there.
KJ Smith Black
Okay, good.
Chris Renee Hazel
That was good. Thank you.
KJ Smith Black
I think it was my first time telling that story.
Chris Renee Hazel
Oh, wow.
KJ Smith Black
Yeah.
Chris Renee Hazel
Kips exclusive.
KJ Smith Black
Kips exclusive.
Chris Renee Hazel
I love it.
KJ Smith Black
Next week on Sisters. That's what it reminds me of.
Chris Renee Hazel
Right, Right. Exactly. You gotta watch it live. Going through all that, I'm really interested to know, like, what toll that took on your faith to get to that point of joy, you know? Cause I know there had to be doubts. There had to be fear.
KJ Smith Black
Oh, my gosh. It took my faith to a whole nother level. I mean, listen. And I didn't even realize how doubtful I was. I didn't realize how weak my faith was. I'm gonna be honest with you. I was telling my executive, Felicia this the other day. I was like, you know what I just realized? I said, of all the interviews I've done, of all the press I've done. I mean, been acting a long time. It's been a lot of interviews. It's been a lot. Especially with our show. With the success of it. It's interviews all the time. Which I love.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
Well, I love now. I used to be way too Anxious to enjoy it because I was such a perfectionist. Now I'm like, what you wanna talk about? Let.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
But I was telling her, I said, you know, I was, I was looking back at some old stuff of me and I was like, I have never given God the glory, like publicly.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
And I'm like, I'm always a big.
Chris Renee Hazel
Part of your life, right?
KJ Smith Black
He was part of my life. And I'm a believer. And I feel like, you know, I felt there was a part of me that just, I don't know, I just felt like there was a part of me that felt like that was for someone else to do. Maybe someone more proficient, someone who knew the Bible back and forth you thought was worthy or someone who I thought was worthy. I mean, you know me, I was wild. Now. Oh, listen, Crystal. No, we ain't. Go ahead. We ain't no secrets. We give it 100 right here. I was wild. A free spirit. You understand? She knows it. That's why she laughing. She laughing because it's true. And I just.
Chris Renee Hazel
So I was like, if I could only be as free as kj. Yes.
KJ Smith Black
And you know, and I love that. And a part of me felt like being a free spirit did not give me the authority to talk about my relationship with God because I feel like people would judge that. They would be like, but you like to dance and you like to go to parties and you like to have parties and things like that. And I'm like, I'm still a God loving woman and a child of God. And a child of God. And I feel like God loves dancing as well. Dance?
Chris Renee Hazel
Like who? Dance, David. Hello. Exactly.
KJ Smith Black
So I think there was a part of my life and my worthiness that I had to overcome with my relationship with God. And Felicia said something really poignant. She said, God is going to make it so that you have to make him a part of your story. And I received that because no one asked me about it, so I didn't bring it up. And then people assume that I am, I am a. On my knees, journaling, praying.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
I don't play about God and God don't play about me. You think these blessings just, just coming out of thin air, right? No, and I know they don't. And, and so, you know, I had. It just dawned on me and I, you know, I prayed before even coming on here. I said, God, what would you have me to say?
Chris Renee Hazel
Yep. Every time I leave my house before I come here, I say that.
KJ Smith Black
And that's how I move all the time.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah, that's good.
KJ Smith Black
What would you have me to do? What would you have me to say? And I can honestly say it didn't happen until this miracle.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
Because I'm like, oh, my purpose is bigger. I can't control when or what happens in my life.
Chris Renee Hazel
Right.
KJ Smith Black
Because I tried to control this.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
And I don't know why, girl. Amateur hour. But I. I couldn't control it. And I was like, wait, that's not the plan. I'm supposed to get pregnant in April.
Chris Renee Hazel
Right. Or.
KJ Smith Black
Or after my birthday, May 6th.
Chris Renee Hazel
Right.
KJ Smith Black
I don't want to be pregnant on my birthday. I want to turn up. No.
Chris Renee Hazel
Right.
KJ Smith Black
But, you know, God was like, no, it's on my time.
Chris Renee Hazel
It is.
KJ Smith Black
And I have learned the lesson. I'm tired of relearning that lesson.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah, you got it now.
KJ Smith Black
I'm tired of relearning that lesson, girl. Everything is on God's time. And I'm tired of trying to control. I'm trying to. I'm not even trying. Releasing is easy, actually. It's easier than I thought it was.
Chris Renee Hazel
It is. Yeah. I'm proud of you for that. I remember meeting you want to say 2018 when you did 17. Was it 17? We did Madea's family funeral, and you were just this bright, bubbly, free spirit. And then we met in 2000. We got reocclaimed in 2019 when sisters got picked up, and you were still that same girl. And then there was this transition that turned into this very calculated kj.
KJ Smith Black
Yes.
Chris Renee Hazel
Where you didn't speak like yourself. And we talked about this. I was like, you ain't even talking. Like, KJ Agreed. And you got to a point, you're like, I'm getting back to me. What was that transition? And what were you going through when you were. Was you just trying to figure out your. Your lane in this industry or who you were in this industry? And your voice. Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
I lost myself.
Chris Renee Hazel
That's a real thing.
KJ Smith Black
I. I completely lost myself. I. I was trying to be what people wanted me to be. I played this attorney on television, so I wanted to make sure I was always pulled up and articulate. And I wouldn't sit like this.
Chris Renee Hazel
Right.
KJ Smith Black
I would be. If I would do the interview where we Poised.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
And I would.
Chris Renee Hazel
We're good. Am I?
KJ Smith Black
Am I? Is every. And I would. And I would change my voice, and I would shift.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
I am a Southern girl from Tallahassee, Florida.
Chris Renee Hazel
Come on.
KJ Smith Black
And yes, I've done the articulation classes and things like that, but that girl is still there. And the bass in my voice is still there. You know what I mean? And so I would. I would turn on, like, if we had done this interview and that's what. God's time.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yep.
KJ Smith Black
We had done this. Even when you first started it, I. I don't even know if I was myself.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah, no, not that time. No.
KJ Smith Black
Yeah, I know. I was. I was a different person.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
And I. And at some point, I didn't even recognize myself. And I think you. I hit. I think you hit the nail on the head. I was trying to find myself in this energy industry. We had gone from anonymous. I don't know how you did it. You. I mean, you did it flawlessly, in my opinion. And maybe because you. I don't know. I don't know how you did it, but for me, oh, my gosh, I just was like, I felt blindsided in a good way, like by the success. Success and the fame of the show. And, you know, it was one time, I think the shift was we went to Mardi Gras when we went and saw Essence Festival. Essence Festival, Yes. And. And we went out in the public, in the. At the parade monograph, and people were like, I know you, Andy.
Chris Renee Hazel
Andy, Andy.
KJ Smith Black
And I was like. And they just went. And I was like, whoa, whoa, what is going on?
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
And then for that, you know, I think from that time until I would say, even right now, just right now, most recently, maybe the last, like I said, the summer, because I had to learn how to. I had to get some hormones and listen, ladies, get your hormones checked.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
Hormones change over time. Get your hormones checked. I had to get my hormones checked because things were kind of out of whack. I had to figure out what was going on with my emotions. I had to figure out why I had high cortisol levels, I had high estrogen levels.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
Everything is not glittering gold. Sometimes there's things going on inside. And listen, I would love to still be that one same young 21 year old, but my body's changing, my life.
Chris Renee Hazel
Is changing, and there everybody's is.
KJ Smith Black
Yes.
Chris Renee Hazel
That's so good, kj.
KJ Smith Black
Yes. So I. I'm going through these hormonal changes.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
And then I'm also having a very public experience. Experience. And so I did become. I tried to get controlling and calculating and this is going to make sense. And this is good. And this is my brand and this is what I stand for and this is what I want to look like and this, you know, and some things are true to me. Like, I still want to be cute.
Chris Renee Hazel
Always.
KJ Smith Black
I still want to be cute.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes. And lay like.
KJ Smith Black
And that's ins. And that's who I am, and that's okay. But I do not want to be overthinking. I do not want to be stressed out. I do not want to be false. I don't want to be inauthentic. And, I mean, you hit the nail on the head. I absolutely was lost.
Chris Renee Hazel
And when you. I think you took a break from Instagram, you came back on. And I said, that's my kj. That's my girl. And I was like, she got it.
KJ Smith Black
You're right.
Chris Renee Hazel
What was that like? Ah, I can't do this anymore. Was there a moment or anything that made it click?
KJ Smith Black
Girl, I hit rock bottom, child. You already know. You already know. You already know. You know.
Chris Renee Hazel
The noise up here. Why are you doing it?
KJ Smith Black
We got parking, side jokes, y'. All.
Chris Renee Hazel
I just spilled this down. My whole story.
KJ Smith Black
You good?
Chris Renee Hazel
I'm great.
KJ Smith Black
I'm great.
Chris Renee Hazel
Good, good, good. You'll never know.
KJ Smith Black
Yeah.
Chris Renee Hazel
If it looks like I got booze swept, it's just water.
KJ Smith Black
It's water. Everybody be all right. Yeah. I think, you know, I got to the point where we had the. When did it. When did. I was like, oh, wow. I've had a few pivotal moments in my life that we've all. You know that you've been there with me during those times.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
My wedding was one of them. And that was a. That was a very, very specific low for me because I had. Yeah. Because I. I did something I wanted to do. I did something I wanted to do.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
I did something the way I wanted to do it. And it went.
Chris Renee Hazel
I feel.
KJ Smith Black
Was KJ like, that was me.
Chris Renee Hazel
It felt like you. Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
That was me being like, I'm gonna be me. The bachelorette party. That was me.
Chris Renee Hazel
Oh, yeah. That was what I was.
KJ Smith Black
I was like, that's me. That's my style. That's who I am. That's authentic to me. And it got so much coverage, and I don't think that I have. I. I'm fine with the way people speak about my character. But then when people start speaking about you as a person is different. And I started. I was like, whoa, what's going on? Like, I love this about myself. I love this experience I had. Now, we did have some. Some issues. Our weddings are weddings, you know, but we did have some. Some particular issues. But the wedding, overall, my husband and I curated that to do what we wanted to do.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
And then people kind of made it something ugly, and it Was like, the happiest day of my life.
Chris Renee Hazel
Right.
KJ Smith Black
And so I was like, whoa, There's a disconnect between, you know, me and the people that. Opinions I value.
Chris Renee Hazel
Right.
KJ Smith Black
You know, or. Or in fans and. And people who I don't really know.
Chris Renee Hazel
Right.
KJ Smith Black
As well. Is all these things.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
All these things. And. And when you have these major events, people have. They want to. Right now, they telling me, this is what you need to do for your baby. This is how you raise it. This is what you do. You make sure you spank that baby.
Chris Renee Hazel
You make.
KJ Smith Black
And don't sleep with that baby. You make sure to. I'm like, everybody relax. I'm gonna do what I wanna do, period.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
I'm gonna do what I wanna do. And I don't. And I mean that with the most love and care in my heart. And. And now that I'm back in alignment with my. My source.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
Now that I'm back in alignment with God, I can trust myself.
Chris Renee Hazel
Right? Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
Everything gonna be. We good over here? We Gucci. But, yeah. I think around the wedding time, that's when I said, I cannot be connected to people's. And that's when I started to see the shift that was in 2023. And I was like, okay, I have to. I have to figure out how to understand who I am.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
Own who I am. Be proud of who I am. Trust that.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
And stand in that without trying to acquiesce to what's cool, what's trendy or what people think. Because I'll do something I love for myself. And then I'm talking about back in the day. No, no. Back in the day, I'll do something I absolutely love for myself. And then I'll read a comment that makes me so. It hurts me so bad. And I'll be like, oh, maybe I shouldn't have done that. Okay. Next time I'm gonna do this. It's like, excuse me. Excuse your part. Now I write a comment back. Like, excuse me, ma'. Am, I'm grown. Who you think you talk to?
Chris Renee Hazel
Right.
KJ Smith Black
Keep it positive, sweetie. Tell them, keep it positive, sweetie.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
Like, for real. Everybody relax.
Chris Renee Hazel
I remember even, like, when I became famous or I still don't. People could ask me, are you the.
KJ Smith Black
You're mad famous. No, you're mad famous. Own it. I'm gonna gas you up. You're super famous.
Chris Renee Hazel
I love you, Fred.
KJ Smith Black
Yes.
Chris Renee Hazel
Go ahead. I had a. I was on a plane, and her daughter recognized me, and the mom was, like, sitting next to me. She goes, excuse Me, are you a famous person? I was like, I guess so. It was, it still doesn't click, you know.
KJ Smith Black
No way.
Chris Renee Hazel
Still no, like crystal. I know it like when people see me and stuff. But like when people ask me, like I've never had anybody ask me, are you famous? You know, to like, to answer that. Yeah. It felt weird to say. I kind of. Yeah. I mean, I don't know, what do you recognize me from? You know, it's just weird. But she was actually really dope. But I remember before, like we've gotten this fame that I didn't care about. Nobody had. Whoever was following me, wanted to follow me. Cause they genuinely loved me and like they were supporters of me. So it was all love. And then we get this platform. We're on everyone's televisions in their living rooms. They welcome us into our home and then it becomes this like obsession and this ownership of us. And I felt like everything that I did was under a microscope. And I would like read every comment and it would literally, how you say that hurt. It would hurt my feelings. And then I would start second guessing things and I would start saying, well, maybe I just won't post anymore. I was just second guessing my entire life in every move. And it does like change your way of thinking, the way you move, the way you even entertain people. You know, it kind of puts you kind of. Because you don't know who's who. It's like, absolutely. Let me just put a wall up, girl.
KJ Smith Black
Come on now.
Chris Renee Hazel
Damn.
KJ Smith Black
Are we gonna talk about it?
Chris Renee Hazel
We gonna talk about it?
KJ Smith Black
Yes, the wall, the wall.
Chris Renee Hazel
It's a real wall that comes with this that we didn't even know. I don't know if we knew it up.
KJ Smith Black
I had no clue.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
And now it's like, oh, my friend, I'm. I'm going to come over. I'm bringing my friend. No, you're not. No, you're not.
Chris Renee Hazel
No, no, you're not.
KJ Smith Black
No, you're not. They have not signed the NDA. This is my home. This is my sacred space.
Chris Renee Hazel
Come on, NDA. I don't play that. Yes, everybody.
KJ Smith Black
We're in that space. We're in that space. God, thank God. Yes, I am grateful for that. But it does come with this protection for your yourself, you know?
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah, I received that. Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
I don't know how you did it, girl.
Chris Renee Hazel
It was hard. Yeah. And you say I handle it gracefully, but it. There was many days where I would sit at home just like sad and like not feeling my best self. People still talk crazy about me, you know, And I'm just like, oh, whatever. And what really irks me is I don't go looking for that stuff. It's the people that tag me in it to let me know and they're trying to like, say like somebody needs to block this person because they're talking bad about you. But I would never have seen it if you didn't tag me on it. You were intentional about making sure I saw this to know that I got a big nose. I know that you didn't have to tag me on that. Your nose is perfect.
KJ Smith Black
As is Fine. We love a contour.
Chris Renee Hazel
It's nothing wrong. I love the contour, but I like that concert off.
KJ Smith Black
It's still perfect.
Chris Renee Hazel
Thank you. But you know, like, it's one of those things like they like highlight and make sure that you see everything. It's like I'm so busy. I'm not looking for that. But then when I go look at my mentions to like repost people that I that are support me, then I'm seeing the, the filth and the messiness and all that.
KJ Smith Black
And it's just like, baby, I'm a warrior in the army of the Lord. You understand? I will block you so fast. I got my sword and shield and I'll go to war in case I need to.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
I don't, I don't. I don't play those types of games.
Chris Renee Hazel
I love black.
KJ Smith Black
I worked so much on myself. If people knew how hard it is to do what we do, how much much energy it takes to work on yourself so that you can present, so you can create a platform like this that changes people lives.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes. I had to fix me first.
KJ Smith Black
Hello.
Chris Renee Hazel
Listen, I couldn't come in here messed up. I had to figure out what was wrong with me before I can get on here and tell you guys, this is what I've been through. These are my experiences and this is how I got through it.
KJ Smith Black
Absolutely.
Chris Renee Hazel
If I didn't do the work, and that was even hard, you know, looking myself in the mirror and then looking at little Crystal and teenage Crystal, adulthood Crystal and all her mistakes and what has shaped me to be the woman I am today. That's a hard lens to look through, you know, but to be able to do that, you have to do that.
KJ Smith Black
You have to heal and you continue to be transparent. I love that about you. And I think for me, I started off so transparent and I've kind of retreated and I don't know what that is, but. But I. I would love to get back to the space where I can be transparent and. And. And just leave it.
Chris Renee Hazel
You know what I mean?
KJ Smith Black
And not even whatever comes. That. Whatever comes. It doesn't affect me at all. I'm not there yet. Because, you know, when people leave comments, I still will be like, you did that to hurt me, and I don't appreciate it.
Chris Renee Hazel
Right.
KJ Smith Black
That wasn't nice. That wasn't kind. I do do it in love now, though.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
I used to do. I used to do it in pettiness. I used to do it in, like, malice, which. That was not the person I wanted to be. But now I'm like, what you did wasn't kind.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
I want you to know that you have hurt my feelings.
Chris Renee Hazel
And how do they respond to that? Or do they just delete the comment.
KJ Smith Black
Apologize, beg me in the DMs? I'm so sorry. I was having a bad day.
Chris Renee Hazel
Oh, yeah.
KJ Smith Black
I'm like, so why would you take that out on me? That's not nice.
Chris Renee Hazel
Some of them just want attention. Some. I had a girl that did. That, did this whole thing, and then when I blocked her, she was like. She sent this long letter. She's like, oh, my God. She was like, I'm so sorry. She was like, I did that. Can you please unblock me? That was my mom's page, and I had wrote it from her page. And she really loves you. And it was like, this whole thing, and I was like.
KJ Smith Black
No, you got be more careful. Yeah. That wasn't. That wasn't kind.
Chris Renee Hazel
It was not kind.
KJ Smith Black
And. And that's. That's the thing that I'm learning is some people are hurt, and they want to take it out on whomever they see. I'm. I'm so happy.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
I don't know if I've been happier.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
And I've already gone through the survivor's remorse of that.
Chris Renee Hazel
Good.
KJ Smith Black
I dealt with that already. I've overcome that.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
I. I want to be able to be happy out loud. I want to be able to share my testimony. I was just talking in the car. We were talking, me and sky and Fee. We. Again, we were talking like, I was. Oof. I'm not gonna cry. I am not gonna cry. I spent way too much.
Chris Renee Hazel
What's on this? She's like, okay, because you will cry, baby. My baby will cry. You know, I'm not gonna cry.
KJ Smith Black
And I've been working on that, too. I've been working on my emotional regulation, because I am. I am a crybaby.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
And I want to master knowing when and when not to. And that's. That's the thing. And it's. And I'm like, I. I want to cry if it's authentic to me, but sometimes it's inappropriate.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
You know what I mean? Sometimes it's just inappropriate. You know, right now. I can cry with you.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
But I just don't want to ruin my makeup.
Chris Renee Hazel
I know. Listen, hold it together.
KJ Smith Black
I just don't want to ruin my makeup. I'm gonna be honest with you. Okay.
Chris Renee Hazel
I feel you.
KJ Smith Black
But, you know, I. I was talking in the car and we were talking about the struggles of an artist, and a lot of people, they. They're like, oh, yeah. You know, when you. Your transition, you had a job.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah. Yeah. A lot of people didn't. You had a job, a good job.
KJ Smith Black
A good job at a good company. I did not.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
And that doesn't make my journey better or worse, but it's my journey.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
And people see me where I am now.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah. Talk about it.
KJ Smith Black
And they don't see the 10 years that I was eating Cheerios and trying to split a rotisserie at the Kroger and at the Winn Dixie with my roommates because we did not have food. Or the five people that lived in a two bedroom apartment.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes. Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
They don't know that story.
Chris Renee Hazel
No.
KJ Smith Black
And you know what? It shouldn't matter.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
You shouldn't be mean to me because I told you a sad song.
Chris Renee Hazel
Right.
KJ Smith Black
You shouldn't be mean to me. I mean, you shouldn't be mean. You shouldn't be nice to me because I've told you my sad song.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
And I used to. What people. When people would be mean to me, I'd be like, you don't know what I've gone through. You don't know what I've. My struggle.
Chris Renee Hazel
Right.
KJ Smith Black
And I used to wear that as a badge of honor. You don't know what I've overcome.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
And this and this and this. And I would lay all my trauma out, and I'm like, but I've overcome it.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
I'm not about to open my wound to justify my joy to you.
Chris Renee Hazel
Mm. Yeah, that's true.
KJ Smith Black
You can choose to be nice to me, or you can choose to not be in my life.
Chris Renee Hazel
Right.
KJ Smith Black
Because I'm gonna be nice to you regardless.
Chris Renee Hazel
Regardless. And you're gonna be happy regardless.
KJ Smith Black
And I'm gonna be happy regardless. But I used to just lay my whole life on the table. Well, what about. I took the risk and I lived in la and I was damn near homeless, and I was working three jobs and a waiter and a server, and people were disrespectful to me. And I got told no 3,000 times. And I did a million auditions and I just would just spew.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
All of it out just so someone could be nice to me.
Chris Renee Hazel
Right.
KJ Smith Black
Just so you can feel like I can relate to you.
Chris Renee Hazel
Right.
KJ Smith Black
Because you're where I was 10 years ago.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
And you can go. You don't have to go through what I went through. No. Maybe if you would have been nice to me, I could put. I could tell you how.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah, exactly.
KJ Smith Black
But you want to tear me down.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah. It's so sad. Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
It's very interesting.
Chris Renee Hazel
It is.
KJ Smith Black
You know, I've changed a lot. I'm really proud of myself.
Chris Renee Hazel
I'm proud of you. Seriously. Yeah. I am so proud of you. I look at you and I'm like.
KJ Smith Black
Man, you've seen it.
Chris Renee Hazel
I have.
KJ Smith Black
Oh, you have. Y', all, it's been a great road.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes, it really has. This is my girl.
KJ Smith Black
You had to be there.
Chris Renee Hazel
You did a great road. Speaking of the road, I wanna go back to 2019 when we started Sistas. And this show has just completely changed our lives. We are. Well, I'll just say we know season nine. We're in season nine and nine seasons. Thinking back to then season one, we're all coming in like, whoa, we got this show. This is amazing. Did you ever think it would be what it is today and the impact on the culture that it's had?
KJ Smith Black
No.
Chris Renee Hazel
I mean, I would.
KJ Smith Black
No.
Chris Renee Hazel
You can't even imagine Crystal, when we.
KJ Smith Black
Were in that room. Crystal, not Crystal.
Chris Renee Hazel
Producer. Right.
KJ Smith Black
Big boss dog. You know what I'm saying? We ain't gonna downplay my girl humble, but I'm not. We not gonna downplay my good sis. Okay.
Chris Renee Hazel
Kj, Big.
KJ Smith Black
Big boss Dog.
Chris Renee Hazel
Okay.
KJ Smith Black
I'm a gasser up every time. Okay. We in the room. It's a theater size room. I don't know how much I can say.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah, we can talk about that. Okay. There you go.
KJ Smith Black
It was a theater sized room. His pictures on the board. Okay. And at that time, I had already been cast as Andy and Deval had already been cast as that. And we were cast and Big Boss Dog was with other producers and they were trying to. They were moving, moving names around, names matching people.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
Come back. You know Cheetah, Wakoja, can you come back in for this role? Anthony Dalton, can you come in for this role? And it was just like, like such a magical moment. It was such a magical moment because they, they do something special over there where they, they love you and they're going to find something for you.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes. They don't just throw you away. Like if you don't fit what you read for. It's like, we're going to find something for you.
KJ Smith Black
We're going to find something for you.
Chris Renee Hazel
That's so true.
KJ Smith Black
They don't toss you away. They say, I'm going to find something for you. It may not be this, but it's going to be this. Going to be this movie or something.
Chris Renee Hazel
Cuz some people Tyler be like, wait, no, they need to be on this. This is actually so and so on this show. And I'm like. The fact that he can even like see that while he's casting for a completely different show and still give you something.
KJ Smith Black
Yes, absolutely.
Chris Renee Hazel
I love him for that.
KJ Smith Black
That day, the day my life changed, honestly, was that day.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
And you. And you were there.
Chris Renee Hazel
It was a beautiful day.
KJ Smith Black
It was the most incredible day. But we had already known each other because that was 2019 and we had known each other from 2017 because of Madea's family funeral. And that unbeknownst to you, I don't know if I told you that my dad had died.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah. I didn't find out until later.
KJ Smith Black
Oh, right.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
I was depressed during that time and to be shooting a movie about a funeral.
Chris Renee Hazel
Ma'. Am.
KJ Smith Black
After my father had passed away. My father had passed away in January. I think I booked that film in February. We were shooting in March.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
And I was grieving so hard. And you were so kind. You were so kind. Cause I was a walking zombie and.
Chris Renee Hazel
I had no idea.
KJ Smith Black
And you didn't know. You were so nice.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah. But it doesn't. I feel like you should, because you don't know what people are going through. You should always be kind, you know. And I think that's something I learned just growing up. My family always instilled that in me. So that moments like that, if I was. If I didn't have those foundations, it could have been a different story. She wasn't so kind. You know. And I was going through a really tough time and I came into my fitting and you were just like, all right, whatever, you know. Right. You just never know. So I'm always. I make a point to be kind to everyone. Yeah. And you do too, though. Like, your energy is always just so pleasant.
KJ Smith Black
I. I love people. I really do. I love. I rock with anybody.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
Like I. I rock with anybody. I don't care how much money you got.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
I don't care what kind of car you drive, because I've been every.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
Everything on the totem pole, from dirt bro to middle class to all. I. I'm. And I'm also a confident person, so it's like, I rock with everybody. I don't need to, you know, I don't need to dim your light.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
I got my own. I enjoy mine, too. You know what I'm saying? All shine.
Chris Renee Hazel
Right.
KJ Smith Black
You know, that's. That's my spirit, so. And then, especially in our industry, having worked so many of the jobs. You, you, you.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
This is what we. We have in common. Having been a pa, haven't been a background artist, having been those things. You know, the importance of being kind to somebody.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
You know, the importance of making somebody's day. They just want a picture. Come on.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
What? You want to call your mama, right?
Chris Renee Hazel
I'm quick to tell somebody to call her.
KJ Smith Black
Get her on the phone.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
And we gonna have.
Chris Renee Hazel
I love it.
KJ Smith Black
Get you. Let me talk to your mama.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yep. They're like, my mom. Look, call her. They be like, for real. I'm like, like, call her.
KJ Smith Black
Get a picture. Yeah, call her right now. That. We rock with people. And I think that, you know, for that reason alone, we don't take this opportunity for granted.
Chris Renee Hazel
Absolutely not.
KJ Smith Black
And I think people can feel that.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
And I. I'm never going to change that. I'm never. Now even as depressed as I ever was, I've never been mean or felt like I had to shun or be rude to anybody I've worked with or anybody who's a supporter of the show, I like to say, or a fan of the show because I'm so grateful you watched.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
Thank you.
Chris Renee Hazel
Those of you are welcoming. Welcoming us into their homes. That's a very safe space. The fact they're like, this is a show I want to watch on Wednesday nights, you know, like, it's a privilege.
KJ Smith Black
Yes.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
And. And, you know, not to give anybody too much credit, but they're a part of my journey.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
Now, you know why? Because we allow. We allow the space for people to get involved in our personal life. I share my pregnancy. I share my. My marriage.
Chris Renee Hazel
I share.
KJ Smith Black
So now these people are, you know, who support the show now. Support.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes. Your family like you and who you.
KJ Smith Black
Are and who I am. And I love that.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
I love that. And anytime that we get a chance to reciprocate that to them.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
I want to do it.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah. And you do it so well. I Love, like, when I see you sometimes be tired and k. Just like.
KJ Smith Black
I'm like, hey, y'.
Chris Renee Hazel
All. And I'm like, my feet hurt. I'm tired. You have so much energy. I'm like, you do. I love it, though. I love it. Speaking of your personal life, you and sky met when he was on Sisters, and then he got his own show, all the Queen's Men. Tell us about that. Because KJ and I was living together in the bubble during COVID When I feel like this.
KJ Smith Black
Yeah.
Chris Renee Hazel
That's where it butted. Right, girl? Yes. And I had no idea this girl know how to hold some water.
KJ Smith Black
You know, I'm a keeper of secrets. Yeah.
Chris Renee Hazel
I.
KJ Smith Black
We were in the bubble. Was that our second year in the bubble?
Chris Renee Hazel
I think so.
KJ Smith Black
That was. That was our second year in the bubble. Yeah, that was the second year in the bubble. And of course, you and me, we had all the scenes together, so we spent all of our time being roommates.
Chris Renee Hazel
Studying, and I can't just stay with anybody.
KJ Smith Black
Hello.
Chris Renee Hazel
Okay. I'm really about my space, and that's no shade to nobody. I love everybody, but living with somebody. Me and kj.
KJ Smith Black
Yes.
Chris Renee Hazel
It's like.
KJ Smith Black
It's an energy thing.
Chris Renee Hazel
It's an energy thing. Like, we're staying together, right?
KJ Smith Black
Absolutely.
Chris Renee Hazel
You're like, absolutely. I'm like, perfect.
KJ Smith Black
Absolutely. And it was great.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
But, yes, sky, we were trying to keep it a secret, but he would do things like, you know, walk me to the door or, you know, when we first land, he grabbed my luggage and try to help me, because we started dating just before we went into the second bubble.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
I met him in the first bubble.
Chris Renee Hazel
Right.
KJ Smith Black
And so we. We didn't even really. I don't want to say we didn't connect because we connected on a spiritual level. And what I mean by that is we didn't even get an opportunity to sit down alone, uninterrupted, and have a full conversation.
Chris Renee Hazel
Wow.
KJ Smith Black
Because in season two, we were just getting back from co. We were just coming back to shoot during COVID and he and I would just be in the same space.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah. Like, in the gym. In the gym, we'd be running. And here comes Sky.
KJ Smith Black
Absolutely. Or. Or at the taco truck. At the taco truck.
Chris Renee Hazel
And it's just. Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
And he's like. He tall, so it's like. It's just like this looming figure. I have to turn around. Like, bro, hey. Hey. What's up?
Chris Renee Hazel
Right.
KJ Smith Black
Mind you, we're all wearing masks.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
So all I'm seeing is this Man's face here.
Chris Renee Hazel
Right.
KJ Smith Black
Like, I'm not even. I'm just saying.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
Because the mask is here. So it was energy. His energy was just like. I was like, oh, tall, handsome. Hi, sir. You from Miami? I'm from Tallahassee. I'm a Florida girl, myself.
Chris Renee Hazel
Connection.
KJ Smith Black
Yeah. We really just started to connect. And, you know, he'll start to ask me like, hey, you know, where you from? What you doing? And things like that. And then, you know how it is at work, Even if you're on lunch, there's someone interrupting you because they're like, hey, we need you in hair and.
Chris Renee Hazel
Makeup or run lines.
KJ Smith Black
Hey, can you run lines? Or, hey, we need to do you a wardrobe fitting or VR.
Chris Renee Hazel
We need to go do. Yes. Always something.
KJ Smith Black
Yes. So that's what kept happening in season two.
Chris Renee Hazel
Wow.
KJ Smith Black
We kept. Which. Which. Which I needed because, honestly, I wasn't ready. I wasn't ready for anything.
Chris Renee Hazel
And I remember that. Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
Yeah. I wasn't ready. I wasn't ready for that. So season two, that's what happened. And then season three, while we were roommates.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
He.
Chris Renee Hazel
He.
KJ Smith Black
He made a move a couple weeks before we went back to shooting. And I'm an all in type of girl. I was like, oh, I like him and I want him. And he was like, I like you and I want you. And we were just like. And then we were kind of connected at the hip from then on, but we were trying to hide it because we just didn't want any. We didn't want any. And, you know, I had shared my relationships with you before. Yeah, I had shared all of my relationships, and I even shared that one. You must have forgot. Cause I did tell you. I was like, I like a guy. And you. And I kind of told you.
Chris Renee Hazel
You told me at the pict picnic and everything about before y' all came. You told me about that, but I don't think you told me.
KJ Smith Black
I don't know. Yeah, I don't think I told you.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah. And then I remember one night, because I think those houses are haunted. And I heard. I swear I heard some, like, footsteps and, like, some pants, you know, like the pants in the house. And I was like.
KJ Smith Black
I was too scared to let him in the house.
Chris Renee Hazel
Okay. I was one.
KJ Smith Black
I was like, no, no, I wasn't scared.
Chris Renee Hazel
Was that a ghost?
KJ Smith Black
No, no, no. That was the ghost. It was.
Chris Renee Hazel
Oh, God.
KJ Smith Black
I was too scared. He was too scared to get fired, too. Actually, he was scarier than me.
Chris Renee Hazel
Cause he was staying on the lot, too. So he riding that Bike.
KJ Smith Black
Like Debo, my now husband, was like, I'm gonna drop you off at the porch.
Chris Renee Hazel
I'm a holler.
KJ Smith Black
He was like, bye, I'm scared. He was like, your job is secure, Monty.
Chris Renee Hazel
Listen, smart man. Yes.
KJ Smith Black
I was like, no, you can. You can sit on the porch with us.
Chris Renee Hazel
He's like, no, he's like, I'm hollering. Yeah, exactly. I'm gonna be a gentleman and bring you.
KJ Smith Black
Yeah. Yes. And he did that. So we ended up spending like every evening, you know, eating dinner and just trying to, like, kind of get away from everybody. And then I'll be like, okay. I mean, it's not much time you could spend because all we do is study.
Chris Renee Hazel
That's so. Yeah, that's it.
KJ Smith Black
Yeah. But it was. It was the catalyst to the rest of my life. And so. Yeah.
Chris Renee Hazel
And at what point did you know, like, this is my husband?
KJ Smith Black
Right away.
Chris Renee Hazel
Really?
KJ Smith Black
Yeah, girl. I mean, our first date, I was like, like, so are you, like, you available for the rest of your life? Cuz you're mine.
Chris Renee Hazel
I know. That's right.
KJ Smith Black
Saying like, it. It just.
Chris Renee Hazel
He.
KJ Smith Black
It just felt right. Yeah, it felt right. And you know what I've gone through in past relationships, and it didn't feel like that. Yeah, it didn't feel like that. Those. Like I said, I was trying to control everything. Those. Those moments and those relationships were sometimes relationships that I had manipulated into my mind thinking were great. And I'm like, oh, but he has these qualities. And it's a whole host of other. A scroll of terrible qualities. Aj, listen.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes. We were just talking about this. I was doing an episode called dating in my 40s, a part two for it. And we were talking about how you can have that. These things that you. Okay this person. You get to an age where it's like, I really want to be with somebody. And these are things. My non negotiable. My non negotiables and my boundaries. But then you start to let certain things slide.
KJ Smith Black
Absolutely.
Chris Renee Hazel
You know, and you. You're blinded by like. Wait, these are things that you said were non negotiables.
KJ Smith Black
Absolutely.
Chris Renee Hazel
But these are showing up.
KJ Smith Black
Yeah.
Chris Renee Hazel
You know, that's so true. That's true.
KJ Smith Black
Yeah. I was supposed to be married with children by 35.
Chris Renee Hazel
Me too.
KJ Smith Black
That's what I thought. And so I would squeeze these in these people into my perfect picture that I had created it in my mind. And, you know, things will go left and I'm. I'm. Listen, I'm a ride or die. You know what I'm Saying I'm. I'm a loyal chick.
Chris Renee Hazel
You are. To everybody that you love.
KJ Smith Black
Listen, literally, I love you.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
We locked in, and I'm gonna fight for you. Yes, I am going to. I am not. I'm gonna. I'm not gonna play about you.
Chris Renee Hazel
I don't play about you, and I don't play about you. Yes, I do.
KJ Smith Black
Listen, cut. Say, literally, I don't want to hear cussing, Christian. I ain't gonna do it on the podcast. Y' all make the listen.
Chris Renee Hazel
Your sweeties, they love you, but they are. Yeah, they writers.
KJ Smith Black
It's the Beehive number two. They don't play.
Chris Renee Hazel
That's what Big west be say's like, yes. No. Every time we try to, like, explain to, like, a partner that we're trying to build with, like, they're like, you don't understand. You don't understand. Come.
KJ Smith Black
This is where you want to be. You need to be at. Keep it Positive. Cd, whatever brand is. Listen. Sponsorships, brand dollars. She has the beehive number two. Okay. They do not play. And I love them.
Chris Renee Hazel
Me, too.
KJ Smith Black
They are so.
Chris Renee Hazel
Oh, my gosh.
KJ Smith Black
They're my babies. They see what I see. They see what I've always seen. You know what I mean? And I love that.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah. Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
They ride for you. I ride for you, too. I don't care.
Chris Renee Hazel
You do.
KJ Smith Black
She know, though.
Chris Renee Hazel
You do, though. You ride, ride. I love that. In closing, we are talking about EMP Over. She's like, it's over.
KJ Smith Black
You playing with me.
Chris Renee Hazel
I mean, we can keep going. I just got good and warm, warmed up. She's like.
KJ Smith Black
Like, this liquor. I just got good and warmed up over here.
Chris Renee Hazel
Like, what she got of that cup?
KJ Smith Black
Water.
Chris Renee Hazel
Water. Exactly. In closing, I do want to ask you. Our word for this season is in. And, kj, you are big in mentorship. You're big and pouring into people. What is the impact that you really want to leave and that you're intentional about leaving on this Next Generation?
KJ Smith Black
You know, Crystal, if I'm going to be 100% honest with you, I can give you some fluff PR answers.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
I can be like, oh, I want to change lives of young women in America and across the nation. I am asking God that question right now.
Chris Renee Hazel
That's good. And he'll give it to you.
KJ Smith Black
And I'm gonna wait for the answer.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
And then when I get the answer.
Chris Renee Hazel
I can tell you, yeah, I love that. And that's what I did. That's where the word impact came from. I said, God, how do you Want me to continue to use this platform. And I said, I'm inspiring people every week, but, like, what are we doing? Like, how is this leaving a lasting impression on people? And he said, impact, yes. Find ways to be more impactful. So that's the word I kind of leave with and like to ask people. And I love that, because he will give you that answer.
KJ Smith Black
And I'm gonna wait on it. Y. I'm not going to create my own answer. I'm not. I'm going to wait on it. And I'm glad you asked me that, because that's been in alignment with my spirit lately.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah. Good.
KJ Smith Black
Because it's. It's bigger. It's bigger.
Chris Renee Hazel
It is so much bigger.
KJ Smith Black
And I. And I. And I'm excited to see what happens, but I. I've been in my way for so long.
Chris Renee Hazel
Come on, kj. Yeah, me too.
KJ Smith Black
And I just. I just want to move out the way and let God. God.
Chris Renee Hazel
Big way said. I know that. Feel it. I heard he felt that.
KJ Smith Black
Oh. You know what I'm saying?
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
I just. I want to let God do what God does because I'm tired of getting. Getting involved.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yeah.
KJ Smith Black
Moving things around, and then I be feeling like I gotta start all over.
Chris Renee Hazel
Right. Clean up my mess. Seem like now if you don't sit down somewhere. Yes. Let me orchestrate this.
KJ Smith Black
Now, that's the word I've been getting lately.
Chris Renee Hazel
Sit down.
KJ Smith Black
That. Sit down sternly with the. Like this. Sit down like a mama.
Chris Renee Hazel
Right?
KJ Smith Black
Sit down like that. Like, not friendly.
Chris Renee Hazel
Like, sit down.
KJ Smith Black
Have a seat. No, sit your. Sit down.
Chris Renee Hazel
Sit down. He's done that too long. He's done the. Sit down, kj.
KJ Smith Black
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Chris Renee Hazel
Sit down. Now hang.
KJ Smith Black
It was a tap. Like.
Chris Renee Hazel
Hey, hey.
KJ Smith Black
It's okay. Okay. Then it was a little shove.
Chris Renee Hazel
Just like.
KJ Smith Black
It's one of them. The ear pull.
Chris Renee Hazel
Right. That's what God.
KJ Smith Black
That's where God is with me right now.
Chris Renee Hazel
I love it.
KJ Smith Black
I'mma do that. I'mma sit down.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
I'mma listen to the voice of God, and I'm going to get a better understanding of what my grander purpose on this journey is. And then I can answer that question.
Chris Renee Hazel
Awesome. Well, I cannot wait to hear what God gives you. I can't wait to see him continue to just elevate your life. I know it is bigger, and I can't wait to see what you do. I love you, kj.
KJ Smith Black
I love you, too.
Chris Renee Hazel
And before we get out of here, we have a little Keep it positive sweetie for our little sweetie.
KJ Smith Black
Oh, my.
Chris Renee Hazel
I Love you. I'm about to have a little sweetie. Yes, you are, y'. All.
KJ Smith Black
I'm not gonna cry. Oh, my goodness. Chance or keep it positive, sweetie.
Chris Renee Hazel
Mer. Yeah. Yes. She's the first baby to get it. They've been asking for, like, merch, and I was like, yeah.
KJ Smith Black
This is beautiful.
Chris Renee Hazel
You are so welcome. I love you. I love you, too. Thank you for even coming and taking. I know you got all dolled up for me.
KJ Smith Black
Oh, yes.
Chris Renee Hazel
I appreciate it.
KJ Smith Black
Me and the baby.
Chris Renee Hazel
Yes.
KJ Smith Black
I was like, we're. We're going on a show today.
Chris Renee Hazel
Oh, you're a baby, sweetie. You are a baby, sweetie. Yes. TT Chris loves you.
KJ Smith Black
I know.
Chris Renee Hazel
That's right. On today's crystal's closet, I am wearing a pinstripe and flannel set by Soroya. I absolutely love this set. It's so comfortable. It's giving, like, business up top and comfy on the bottom. My shoes are a silver alligator skin. Or actually, I think this is snake skin. My shoes are silver snakeskin by Loewe. These shoes are so comfortable as well. My favorite new shoes. I'm just loving this outfit. Sweeties, I hope you enjoyed hearing today's conversation just as much as I enjoyed having it. Before I let you go, I want to leave you with this quote. The only limit to your impact is your imagination and your commitment. Until next time, keep it positive, sweeties. See you on the next episode.
Podcast Summary: "Keep it Positive, Sweetie"
Episode: Keeping it 100 & Positive w/ KJ Smith Black
Release Date: July 20, 2025
In this heartfelt episode of Keep It Positive, Sweetie, host Crystal Renee Hayslett welcomes her sister, actress and entrepreneur KJ Smith Black, known for her role as Andy Barnes on the hit show Sistas. The conversation delves deep into KJ's personal journey, balancing a high-profile career with motherhood, overcoming infertility, and evolving faith.
KJ opens up about her seventh-month pregnancy during the filming of Sistas, sharing the physical and emotional challenges she faced on set. From acid reflux and motion sickness to the humorous yet poignant moments like struggling with wardrobe changes, KJ illustrates the reality of being a working mother in the entertainment industry.
KJ Smith Black [01:20]: "I'm trying to honor my body and everything that's happening. It's so much change. I'm just allowing. I'm not about to fight with this."
Crystal praises KJ's grace under pressure, noting how KJ's ability to manage her responsibilities inspired her own perspective on balancing career and family.
The conversation shifts to KJ's battle with infertility, exacerbated by conditions like PCOS and fibroids. Despite numerous doctors labeling her infertile, KJ remained determined, embarking on a rigorous health regimen to combat her symptoms.
KJ Smith Black [07:32]: "I started taking a supplement called Inositol. I started taking a lot more magnesium. I started incorporating that into my diet."
KJ emphasizes the importance of self-care and stress management, particularly for Black women who often bear the brunt of societal pressures. Her proactive approach to healing her body was pivotal in her eventual successful pregnancy.
KJ candidly discusses how her journey tested and ultimately strengthened her faith. Initially struggling to integrate her spiritual beliefs with her free-spirited nature, she found solace and purpose by allowing God to guide her path.
KJ Smith Black [16:02]: "It took my faith to a whole other level... I prayed before even coming on here. I said, 'God, what would you have me to say?'"
This transformation highlights the episode's central theme of staying true to oneself while embracing faith and positivity.
KJ shares her experiences with fame, from the overwhelming success of Sistas to the invasive scrutiny that comes with being in the public eye. She reveals how negative comments and public judgment once led her to second-guess her actions and authenticity.
KJ Smith Black [30:26]: "You can choose to be nice to me, or you can choose to not be in my life."
Through personal anecdotes, KJ illustrates the importance of maintaining authenticity and setting boundaries to protect one's mental and emotional well-being.
The episode also delves into KJ's relationship with her husband, Sky, whom she met on the set of Sistas. Their journey from colleagues to life partners is filled with love, mutual support, and shared spiritual beliefs.
KJ Smith Black [51:32]: "Right away. It felt right. And you know what I've gone through in past relationships, and it didn't feel like that."
Their story underscores the significance of finding a partner who aligns with one's values and life goals, especially in high-stress environments like the entertainment industry.
As the conversation winds down, KJ reflects on her role as a mentor and her desire to leave a lasting impact on the next generation. She emphasizes the importance of waiting for divine guidance rather than imposing her own plans.
KJ Smith Black [55:01]: "I am asking God that question right now... I'm going to wait for the answer."
This segment highlights KJ's commitment to genuine mentorship, rooted in faith and personal experience, aiming to inspire young women to embrace their true selves and pursue their dreams with resilience.
Keeping it 100 & Positive w/ KJ Smith Black is a compelling episode that intertwines personal struggle, faith, and triumph. KJ's openness about her challenges and growth offers listeners a powerful narrative of perseverance and positivity. Through her story, she embodies the podcast's mission to create a safe space for uplifting and empowering conversations.
Notable Quotes:
KJ Smith Black [01:20]: "I'm trying to honor my body and everything that's happening. It's so much change. I'm just allowing. I'm not about to fight with this."
KJ Smith Black [07:32]: "I started taking a supplement called Inositol. I started taking a lot more magnesium. I started incorporating that into my diet."
KJ Smith Black [16:02]: "It took my faith to a whole other level... I prayed before even coming on here. I said, 'God, what would you have me to say?'"
KJ Smith Black [30:26]: "You can choose to be nice to me, or you can choose to not be in my life."
KJ Smith Black [51:32]: "Right away. It felt right. And you know what I've gone through in past relationships, and it didn't feel like that."
KJ Smith Black [55:01]: "I am asking God that question right now... I'm going to wait for the answer."
This episode is a testament to the strength of maintaining authenticity, the power of faith, and the importance of community support in navigating life's challenges.