Podcast Summary: Keep it Positive, Sweetie

Episode: The Reality of Reality w/ Kandi Burruss
Host: Crystal Renee Hayslett
Guest: Kandi Burruss
Release Date: September 28, 2025
Duration: ~77 min (excluding ads, intro, outro)

Episode Overview

In this deeply personal and wide-ranging conversation, Crystal Renee Hayslett welcomes the iconic Kandi Burruss—Grammy-winning singer, songwriter, entrepreneur, Real Housewives of Atlanta (RHOA) veteran, and Broadway producer. Together, they dive into the realities behind reality TV, surrogacy and fertility journeys, motherhood, managing business and fame, financial literacy, and the importance of authenticity and community impact. Kandi brings humor, candor, and business wisdom, giving listeners insight into her multifaceted life and legacy.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Kandi’s Atlanta Roots & Family Background

• Kandi shares about her Atlanta upbringing and large family:
  • Born at Crawford Long (on Peachtree), raised off Washington Road in East Point. (04:13)
  • Her mom is the youngest of 14; Kandi has over 80 first cousins, many like siblings. (04:54)
  • “I’m from Atlanta. Stop playing with me.” — Kandi (04:43)
  • Her brother died when she was 15; Riley (her daughter) is named in his honor. (05:56–06:06)
  • Her father’s side is smaller; her grandfather was a bishop. (05:19–05:29)

2. Journey with Fertility, IVF, & Surrogacy

• Openness about fertility struggles and decision for surrogacy:
  • Kandi had multiple fibroid surgeries in her 30s; underwent IVF for both Ace and Blaze. (07:22–08:29)
  • “It’s not guaranteed you’re going to have a child just because you go through IVF.” — Kandi (07:39)
  • High-risk pregnancy with Ace, chose surrogacy for Blaze. (08:29–09:06)
  • Found her surrogate through Dr. Jackie, highlighting the importance of experienced support. (09:34–10:23)
  • On the surrogacy process:
    • Surrogate didn’t live in their home but had ongoing contact and support. (11:27–12:09)
    • Each state has its own laws; stresses importance of thorough legal help. (12:09–15:11)
    • “Try not to be… cheap and skip around and not get the right people.” — Kandi (13:24)
    • Out-of-pocket costs for surrogacy can range from $25K to over $100K, depending on arrangements. (14:01)
  • Shares the emotional side: explaining surrogacy to her daughter Blaze, connecting with other moms she’s helped. (16:03–17:23)
  • On IVF injections: “It wasn’t easy giving yourself those injections… That last shot, I was like…” — Kandi (17:38–18:59)

3. Motherhood, Mom Guilt, and Family on TV

• Navigating a public family life:
  • Shared experiences with mom guilt, especially as a working mother. (25:26–26:11)
  • Her kids appeared on RHOA, with her daughter Riley now on “Next Gen.” (26:11–26:39)
  • Advice to Riley about reality TV: “Be yourself. Whatever you say, stand on it.” (27:17)
  • Kandi’s approach: honesty and authenticity over “brand” — “What comes up comes out.” (33:21–34:04)
• Therapeutic aspects of reality TV:
  • Show served as a diary for her family’s life, created lasting memories. (30:47–31:26)
  • No major regrets about being open—prides herself on her authenticity. (32:06–33:03)

4. Candid Talk on Sex Positivity, Faith, and Parenting

• Sex, faith, and authenticity:
  • Kandi is known for her sex-positive attitude; candid discussion about abstinence, faith, and judgements about sexuality. (34:33–39:23)
  • “Sometimes people put too much on the sex part… like that’s the biggest sin in the world and they skip over all these other sins.” — Kandi (36:44)
• Parenting realness:
  • Emphasizes need for honest, realistic conversations with kids about sex and relationships from middle school. (40:19–43:23)
  • Advice to young girls: “Don’t be doing anything with anybody at your school…You’re gonna feel pressured.” (42:55–43:55)
  • Candid about having to discuss her public persona and rumors (like the “dungeon” storyline) with her children. (44:09–45:43)
• Mother/daughter connection:
  • When Riley first opened up about sex, Kandi cried privately: “In my mind, you know, Riley is not… That’s so hurt to hear she was even thinking about anything.” (49:06–49:37)
  • Reminds young people that their first partner is unlikely to be their last. (50:22)

5. Business, Money, and Financial Wisdom

• Financial literacy lessons & pitfalls:
  • “Good credit is better than money.” — Kandi, echoing her mother’s advice. (51:47)
  • Read “The Millionaire Next Door” at 17, determined to not be a broke teen star. (52:08–52:38)
  • Warns against blind trust in accountants from experience with embezzlement in her first group. (52:47–53:44)
  • Personally signs every check; learns from stars like Oprah and Tyler Perry. (53:44–54:00)
  • Practical tip: Separate bill money and spending money into different banks/accounts—no ATM card for main account. (54:10–55:00)
• Homeownership advice:
  • Bought her first house at 19 on LL Cool J’s advice—own your car and your home. (55:33–55:43)
  • Extra mortgage payments toward principal: “You knocked that thing all the way down.” (56:39–57:06)
  • Entertainment careers are cyclical; plan for longevity. (57:07–57:55)
• On life insurance and wealth-building:
  • Advocates for investment-based life insurance as both security and an investment tool. (58:12–60:46)
  • “Diversify… the money you put in [the policy]—it’s protected.” (61:10)
  • Used her policy to buy a foreclosure outright. (62:08–62:33)
  • Encourages listeners: diversify, invest, even consider crypto (though she admits it’s a risk). (63:05–63:18)

6. Branching Out: Behind the Scenes and Broadway

• Natural evolution from performer to producer:
  • Kandi’s consistent curiosity about the “behind the scenes” of every industry; was Mama Morton in Broadway’s Chicago before producing. (63:38–64:18)
  • Produced “Thoughts of a Colored Man” and “Othello” (64:30–65:41)
  • “Now I feel like I’m official in this lane right now.” — Kandi (65:19)
  • Performing arts had always been a dream, music took off first. (65:44–66:24)
• Facing Risk & Investment Losses:
  • Shares stories of failed investments—money lost fronting her own music tours, recent frustrations investing in girl groups. (66:53–70:02)
  • “When you gambling on other people’s [success], that’s a real gamble.” (69:23–69:37)
  • The pain of believing in others more than they believe in themselves (69:40)

7. Self-Care, Boundaries, and Legacy

• Work-life balance & self-care struggles:
  • Admits to rarely giving herself time to rest and reset, often pours from an “empty cup.” (71:09–72:08)
  • “I don’t really take a lot of time for myself… I’m always just jumping into the next thing.” (71:21–71:42)
  • Crystal encourages her: “We can’t be our best selves…if we’re always exhausted.” (72:49)
• Thoughts on Impact and Legacy:
  • Wishes to be remembered as someone who opened doors & helped others, “did it with no complaints.” (73:29–74:22)
  • Shares a touching personal story about how Kandi’s kindness at Fashion Week made Crystal feel “seen.” (74:38–75:25)
  • “Anything I can do to help shine a light, I’m gonna do that.” (75:45–75:49)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On gratitude for longevity and visibility:

  “Just because you’ve done something before, it doesn’t mean people are going to keep caring. So I’m just kind of, like, thankful for it.” — Kandi (03:55)

• Surrogacy journey:

  “My belly wasn’t working right. That’s what I be trying to tell her [Blaze]. But it’s like I’m trying to figure out how to explain…to her, the process.” — Kandi (16:03)

• On authenticity in reality tv:

  “Everybody go into everything, it’s like, my brand. Oh, I gotta worry about my brand…And sometimes to me, it makes them fake. You know what I mean? And I don’t like that.” — Kandi (33:23)

• Sex-positive attitude:

  “When I have sex, I’m having sex for me. I’m not having sex just because I’m trying to lock you down…there’s so many things about me that should make you stay.” — Kandi (37:47–38:19)

• Financial discipline:

  “Nobody has permission to go and sign nothing for me.” — Kandi (54:00)

• On running her own checks like Oprah:

  “I think I had heard Oprah say that…She taught Tyler that. Tyler taught me.” — Kandi/Crystal (53:45–53:51)

• Helping others as a legacy:

  “I want people to say…I was a woman who opened doors for a lot of people and I helped a lot of people along the way.” — Kandi (73:45)

Highlight Timestamps

• Introductions & Atlanta upbringing: 02:02 – 06:29
• Fertility & surrogacy journey: 06:49 – 17:23
• Motherhood, IVF realities: 17:23 – 22:20
• Mom guilt, kids & reality TV: 25:26 – 30:03
• Sex positivity & faith: 34:33 – 39:23
• Financial wisdom & business lessons: 51:47 – 63:18
• Broadway & behind the scenes: 63:38 – 66:24
• Failures, risk & investments: 66:53 – 70:02
• Self-care & legacy: 71:05 – 74:22

Final Thoughts

This episode is a masterclass in resilience, transparency, and multifaceted success. Kandi Burruss is refreshingly open about her personal battles and business strategies, offering hope and tactical tips to listeners—whether facing fertility issues, wrestling with work-life balance, seeking to own their power, or wanting to build sustainable wealth.

Listeners leave inspired to “keep it real,” uplift others, stay financially literate, and prioritize both community impact and self-care.

Find Kandi:

• Social: @Kandi (all platforms)
• YouTube/Patreon: KandiOnline
• Text: 404-458-9464

Host:

• Crystal Renee Hayslett (@crystalreneehayslett)

“Keep it honest, keep it healing, and always… Keep It Positive, Sweetie.”