← Kennedy Saves the World
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- [00:00]
A
Mom, can you tell me a story?
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B
Sure. Once upon a time, a mom needed a new car.
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A
Was she brave?
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B
She was tired mostly. But she went to Carvana.com and found a great car at a great price. No secret treasure map required.
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A
Did she have to fight a dragon? Nope.
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B
She bought it 100% online from her bed, actually.
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A
Was it scary?
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B
Honey, it was as unscary as car buying could be.
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A
Did the car have a sunroof?
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B
It did, actually.
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A
Okay, good story.
- [00:24]
B
Car buying you'll want to tell stories about. Buy your car today on Carvana. Delivery fees may apply.
- [00:40]
A
Hello and welcome to this episode of Kennedy Saves the World. As you may or may not know, I am a slightly superstitious person. And I have, like all human beings, a dual nature, both sides of which are constantly at war with each other. I would like to thank. Think of myself as being a rationalist, a skeptic, someone grounded in objective fact. But in reality, I am a superstitious witch. And there. There are many ways that my superstitions flourish and guide me as. As I walk and live and breathe throughout this curious life of ours. So recently, I was in Buenos Aires and had a lovely. Learned how to play polo with Guy Benson and my sexy teenage fiance. And we had a very good time. And all of us scored. And we also scored goals in polo. Yeah. Let's get back to basics, please. Okay. Five, six, seven, eight. So we're walking through Buenos Aires and we go into the very famous Recoleta cemetery, which is where Eva Peron? Ne Eva Duarte Evita is buried, but not really buried, because everything is above ground. And it's a very high end, very posh cemetery where all of the tombs look like homes, it's one of those places where every single final resting place is grand. And normally, because I am a superstitious person and I'm very sensitive to the heebie jeebies of various kinds, particularly in graveyards and cemeteries and places of eternal rest. So I don't normally go into them, but last year, when Guy Benson and I were on our tour of Poland and we went to the Jewish cemetery in Warsaw, I actually found it to be very comforting and meaningful. So I was hoping I would have the same feeling walking through the Recoleta cemetery, where I have seen the movie Evita probably 10 times. And I got to see Madonna on the red carpets when she was pregnant, when she was promoting Evita back, I believe, in 1997. And so I wanted to pay my respects to the woman after whom the character of Evita is based, and that is Eva Peron. And we stumbled upon her grave, which is. It's not a grave, it's a tomb which is marked. And all of a sudden I got this intense pressure on my upper and felt a feeling of dread. Now, I have felt that sensation before, and I have to tell you that I have had lingering effects of things like that when I have left various foreign cities. And I try really hard to cover myself with white lights and angels and the Holy Spirit and not let anything stick to me. And so my big worry was, as we were walking through the cemetery, that something would latch on. And hopefully it did not. But the point was that my fiance and I both felt the same thing at the same time. And you can try and be as rational and sensible and walled off as you want, but when you are a superstitious peasant, some things are going to break through and some things you have to listen to. So I left the cemetery immediately because it really freaked me out. And I don't know why it was next to Eva Peron's resting place. I don't. I don't think it was her spirit. I think it was something around that either gets really annoyed and troubled by the tourists who walk by and gawk and that, you know, this lingering thing, whatever it is, feels that that is disrespectful or disturbing. And it felt like something like that was very dark and was pushing us out of the cemetery. So I listened to and I left. Which also brings us to bugs. Recently there was an article in Vox and it posed the question as to whether or not you should be killing bugs in your home. I. And maybe this is my superstitious side. I do not believe in killing spiders. I Full disclosure, and many of you may know this if you watched and enjoyed the podcast I had with the Mentalist a few weeks ago. He guessed the name of an early childhood pet, which was Belinda, which was the name of my beloved tarantula that I received as a gift from my parents for my eighth birthday. So, yes, I do feel a kinship with spiders. I do not believe we should be killing spiders. I do not believe we should be killing spiders because I think that spiders, like dolphins are for some reason, and I don't have any data to back this up, I do not have any historical or religious texts to bolster what I am saying to you. But I feel like dolphins and spiders, among many other creatures are in some way higher minded. And spiders provide a great service and they kill and eat other bugs which are pests to us. And spiders come in various shapes and sizes. So you think you're killing the big one, but you're really just killing the medium one. And. And the medium one disturbs the. The force with the other spiders in the network. And then the big ones know to come and suck your blood in the middle of the night. And that is why you shouldn't kill spiders. I really believe that. So if you're asking me like, what do I do instead, it is very easy. And this goes for all sorts of bugs, but not for fruit flies, lice and fleas and ticks and bedbugs. All of those need to be eradicated. And I think we can all agree on that. I think that is. That is something like. I know very few people who are pro keeping bedbugs alive. So I think we can all jump on that free Britney gravy train. And I don't think that's a very controversial opinion. Don't go anywhere more. Kennedy saves the world right after this. Biters are best entangled like this. You take a plastic cup, hopefully a clear one, and you put it over the spider. It has nowhere to go. And then you take either a piece of tag board or a very thick piece of paper or an envelope. But the flap side has to be down. It can't be up because it'll catch on the edge of the glass. And you put it under there. And obviously the width of the paper has to be wider than the circumference of the plastic cup. And you grab it and you take it outside and you set the spider free. Then the spider tells all of its friends that you're a good person and now you are in the spider gang. You are a bro and you are protected for life or as long as you continue to respect the lives of spiders. So this also goes for beetles, cockroaches, or weird, creepy crawly things. People. For whatever reason, people are really freaked out by cockroaches. And maybe it's their size. I am not. They kind of scare me. They kind of freak me out. But I honor them. And I know they also have to be encapsulated in the plastic entrapment device with the tag board and released so they can tell all their cockroach friends that these people are not to be messed with and we do not have to create an infestation with the fellow bros. And this is. This is how you say you stay safe in the world. And I realize as I am speaking to you today, that none of this sounds sane or rational or objective in any way. At all whatsoever. And now you know what it feels like to be in the middle of a constant civil war between two aspects of being that both feel completely right but that are diametrically opposed to one another. Sometimes you cannot make sense of these things. I do not make the rules. I only adhere to them willy nilly when it suits me or sets my anxiety at ease. So if freeing cockroaches and spiders makes me an inconsistent person, then I don't want to be boringly consistent. But I will say if I saw a spider in a graveyard when I was getting the heebie jeebies, I don't know that I would save it. I would not go out of my way to kill it. But I don't think that I would have the wherewithal to trap it and set it free. I would have to leave it to the various incubi that are occupying occupying that creepy little slice of nighttime. And don't go into cemeteries at night, don't whistle on boats and don't sing at dusk in Appalachia. I don't make the rules. I'm just here to help you out and give you a nudge and keep you on track. And hey man, if that is irrational than throw the cuffs on me and put me into a giant plastic cup. This has been Kennedy Saves the World keeping you spider safe. I'm Kennedy. Listen ad free With a Fox News Podcast plus subscription on Apple Podcasts and Amazon Prime. Members can listen to this show ad free on the Amazon Music app. Oh go ahead and leave me a review while you're there. I'd love to hear what you have to say. You've been listening to Kennedy Saves the World on the Fox News Podcast Network.