Know Your Aura with Mystic Michaela

Episode 305: Toxic Mom Groups & Knowing When to Leave
Released: January 15, 2026

Episode Overview

In this episode, Mystic Michaela and co-host Scotty explore the world of “toxic mom groups” through the lens of aura colors. Drawing from both pop culture (notably, the Ashley Tisdale mom group drama) and personal/community experiences, they discuss why parents seek out community, how different aura colors function in group dynamics, red flags for toxicity, and advice for listeners trying to find their own “mom village.” The show offers both spiritual insight and practical wisdom for navigating the sometimes-fraught world of parenting circles.

Main Discussion Points & Insights

1. Pop Culture Case Study: The Celebrity Mom Group Drama

(Starts ~01:11)

• Background: Inspired by Ashley Tisdale’s viral blog post, “You’re Allowed to Leave Your Mom Group,” which detailed feeling excluded from her star-studded mom circle (members include Hilary Duff, Mandy Moore, Meghan Trainor), listeners requested Michaela’s take on their auras and the group dynamics.
• Michaela’s Aura Reads
  • Hilary Duff: Yellow-Purple, acts as the “ringleader”—decisive, organized, “queen bee” energy.

    “All the energy usually goes to the ringleader... She [Hilary] feels like the center of the energy.”—Mystic Michaela (02:08)

  • Ashley Tisdale: Purple-Blue with a functional “get stuff done” yellow overlay, chafes against the group’s structure, feels rebellious.

    “Who died and made you the queen?”—Mystic Michaela reflecting Tisdale’s likely vibe (03:08)

  • Mandy Moore: Yellow-Indigo, described as “private bubble,” avoids drama, “coastal granny energy.”
  • Meghan Trainor: Blue-Turquoise-Yellow-Purple, neutral, detached, only loosely involved.
• Group Energy Analysis: Michaela describes “competitive” energy, “cult favorites” bonding over a shared era, driven in part by a hustle to recapture past fame.

  “They’re not A-list stars...maybe that moment’s gone, and now they’re in this group together trying to get that moment.”—Scotty (07:05)

2. Why Do We Seek Out Mom Groups?

(Starts ~08:19)

• Spiritual and Emotional Need for Community:
  • Parenthood is an “identity shift”; former friends not in the same phase may not “get it.” Parents crave connection with those in a similar mindset.
  • The initial bond is often only that “we all have babies the same age”—which isn’t necessarily enough for genuine connection.

    “We’re grasping at a village. We need that village, but sometimes it takes time to find the right village.”—Mystic Michaela (10:45)

• Societal Pressures:
  • Lack of broader societal support for mothers (and fathers) drives people to seek their own support networks.
  • Shout-out to child-free friends who “fill the village” role for parents.

3. Mom Group Dynamics According to Aura Color

(Starts ~14:52)

Indigo

• Absorbent empaths needing deep, meaningful conversations.
• Small, intimate groups preferred; dislike small talk and large cliques.

  “Indigos...can get very overwhelmed by small talk. They like to go straight to the deep stuff.”—Mystic Michaela (15:10)

Yellow

• Thrive with organization—seek stability/structure in the chaos of new parenthood.
• Often initiate/lead mom groups and combine self-improvement with community.

  “Maybe my life has done a 180, but there is playdate at 9am on Monday.”—Mystic Michaela (16:40)

Purple

• Changing energy; seek fun, non-judgmental friends who let them reconstruct/express new versions of themselves.
• Need freedom to still “laugh till I cry.”

Blue

• Seek kindness, collective caretaking, “village” vibes—a safe, supportive, family-like group.

  “Blues…like to feed people…they’re looking for family in a mom group.”—Mystic Michaela (20:32)

Turquoise

• Need acceptance of their unique, sometimes unconventional, parenting approaches.
• Value open-mindedness, communal, co-op style groups.

Pink

• Bring childlike joy; orchestrate playful experiences and “aesthetic dreams.”
• Need freedom from judgment for their enthusiastic, creative energy.

Red and Green

• Often less common in mom groups.
• Reds: fiercely independent, value practical help, “teammates,” not emotional support.
• Greens: earthy, non-helicopter, value life experience and research-based tips.

4. When Mom Groups Turn Toxic: Warning Signs & Red Flags

(Starts ~30:37)

• Common Signs
  • Gossip as a pattern (not just venting or concern).
  • Feeling pressure to self-edit.
  • Superficial conversation, lack of vulnerability.
  • Significant phase mismatch (e.g., single parent among partnered parents).
  • Persistent bad vibes after gatherings (“Should feel good!”).
  • Overemphasis on material status, competition (“who said ‘cupcake’ first”; “whose child is the genius”).

    “If you notice that part of the group’s activity is to single someone out and constantly talk about them, guess who that’s gonna be eventually? You.”—Mystic Michaela (33:00)

5. How Aura Patterns Can Show as Problematic Group Behavior

(Starts ~36:32)

Michaela dives into “problematic moms,” explaining how toxic behaviors can manifest through different aura colors:

• Yellow: Over-controlling, perfectionistic, queen bee, inflexible about group rules/vision.
• Purple: Gossip, passive-aggressive rebellion, “moving the vibration of the group to ostracize someone.”
• Indigo: Ghosts the group, withdraws silently.
• Blue: Easily victimized, hypersensitive, “take things personally without self-reflection.” May overstep and parent others’ kids.
• Turquoise: Become rigid about beliefs, easily hurt when group disagrees on fundamental things (e.g., vaccination stances).

  “A problematic turquoise…can be very stressed if people aren’t aligning with their beliefs.”—Mystic Michaela (44:05)

• Pink: Withdraw into their own joy, can become emotionally unavailable to others in the group.
• Green: May not include others, extremely independent, not attuned to social cues for inclusion.
• Red: Can be blunt, call people out with little emotional cushioning.

Notably, intention—not aura—is what makes these behaviors problematic.

6. Listener Stories: Real-Life Mom Group Experiences

(Starts ~50:40)

Michaela and Scotty read listener-submitted stories from the “Mystic Michaela Spiritual Family” Facebook group, illustrating the episode’s themes:

• Ashley N. (Yellow, Pink, Purple): Struggled to form authentic connections with local moms who seemed to have “walls up,” especially with “yellow” moms who appeared to exclude her and her daughter.

  “Sometimes I feel like my aura automatically triggers them and they have no interest in getting to know me.”—Ashley N. (52:17)

• Bailey J. (Green-Turquoise): Realized after trying mom groups that she’s “good at doing my own thing... these groups feel like middle/high school cliques.” She finds support elsewhere and accepts her difference.

• Elizabeth M. (Yellow-Blue-Purple): Tried to fit into a “superficial” neighborhood group by shutting down her purple but got kicked out after questioning why everyone was obsessed with “rose bushes.” Now enjoys her “non-pruned butterfly tree” and newfound freedom.

• Katie C. (Pink-Blue): Only mom with a girl among “boy moms,” felt made to feel like “not a real mom.” Highlighted underlying toxicity and competition in the group dynamic.

  “I think it's just hard to be a mom in general, and there's so much toxicity and competition rather than support.”—Katie C. (56:56)

• Kim B. (Purple-Blue-Indigo): Became a mom at 19, experienced harsh judgment and exclusion based on age. Wore “fake red” energy for self-protection.

Theme: Many commenters identified their aura colors as central to how they experienced group connection or disconnection. Self-acceptance and finding others who “get it” was a common thread.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “We’re grasping at a village. We need that village, but sometimes it takes time to find the right village.” – Mystic Michaela (10:45)
• “Your kid is their own aura color too. That’s the other thing, guys.” – Mystic Michaela (37:36)
• “No matter what you do right, that group is eventually gonna end, because the kids are gonna grow up.” – Scotty (49:19)
• “It's not really the auras problem, it's more an intention problem.” – Mystic Michaela (61:14)

Comic Relief: Michaela and Scotty joke about competitive stroller racing, “queen bee” dynamics, and fantasize about a commune run by turquoise moms where none of these problems exist.

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 01:11 – Origin of episode topic: Ashley Tisdale mom-group drama
• 08:19 – Why parents/guardians join mom groups (identity shifts, social needs)
• 14:52 – Aura-by-aura analysis: what each color needs from a mom group
• 30:37 – Signs you’re in a toxic mom group
• 36:32 – Problematic behaviors by aura color
• 50:40 – Listener mom group stories
• 61:10 – Positive examples and closing thoughts on intention vs. aura

Takeaways & Practical Advice

• Know yourself: Understanding your aura color (or personality type) can help you seek out or design communities that truly support and uplift you during challenging life stages.
• Intention matters: What brings toxicity isn’t the aura, it’s the intention and lack of self-reflection behind behaviors.
• It’s okay to leave: Whether you’re Ashley Tisdale or any parent feeling left out or drained, you are “allowed to leave” a group that doesn’t nourish you.
• Parenthood is inherently vulnerable: Groups form when confidence is lowest and pressure is highest—be gentle with yourself and others.
• Build a real village: Genuine support and spiritual connection are more important than surface similarities or status.

For more, take the aura color quiz at KnowYourAura.com/quizzes and join the ongoing conversation in the Mystic Michaela Spiritual Family Facebook group.