EP305: Toxic Mom Groups & Knowing When to Leave

Summary

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Know Your Aura with Mystic Michaela

Episode 305: Toxic Mom Groups & Knowing When to Leave
Released: January 15, 2026

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Episode Overview

In this episode, Mystic Michaela and co-host Scotty explore the world of “toxic mom groups” through the lens of aura colors. Drawing from both pop culture (notably, the Ashley Tisdale mom group drama) and personal/community experiences, they discuss why parents seek out community, how different aura colors function in group dynamics, red flags for toxicity, and advice for listeners trying to find their own “mom village.” The show offers both spiritual insight and practical wisdom for navigating the sometimes-fraught world of parenting circles.

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Main Discussion Points & Insights

1. Pop Culture Case Study: The Celebrity Mom Group Drama

(Starts ~01:11)

• Background: Inspired by Ashley Tisdale’s viral blog post, “You’re Allowed to Leave Your Mom Group,” which detailed feeling excluded from her star-studded mom circle (members include Hilary Duff, Mandy Moore, Meghan Trainor), listeners requested Michaela’s take on their auras and the group dynamics.
• Michaela’s Aura Reads
  • Hilary Duff: Yellow-Purple, acts as the “ringleader”—decisive, organized, “queen bee” energy.

    “All the energy usually goes to the ringleader... She [Hilary] feels like the center of the energy.”—Mystic Michaela (02:08)

  • Ashley Tisdale: Purple-Blue with a functional “get stuff done” yellow overlay, chafes against the group’s structure, feels rebellious.

    “Who died and made you the queen?”—Mystic Michaela reflecting Tisdale’s likely vibe (03:08)

  • Mandy Moore: Yellow-Indigo, described as “private bubble,” avoids drama, “coastal granny energy.”
  • Meghan Trainor: Blue-Turquoise-Yellow-Purple, neutral, detached, only loosely involved.
• Group Energy Analysis: Michaela describes “competitive” energy, “cult favorites” bonding over a shared era, driven in part by a hustle to recapture past fame.

  “They’re not A-list stars...maybe that moment’s gone, and now they’re in this group together trying to get that moment.”—Scotty (07:05)

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2. Why Do We Seek Out Mom Groups?

(Starts ~08:19)

• Spiritual and Emotional Need for Community:
  • Parenthood is an “identity shift”; former friends not in the same phase may not “get it.” Parents crave connection with those in a similar mindset.
  • The initial bond is often only that “we all have babies the same age”—which isn’t necessarily enough for genuine connection.

    “We’re grasping at a village. We need that village, but sometimes it takes time to find the right village.”—Mystic Michaela (10:45)

• Societal Pressures:
  • Lack of broader societal support for mothers (and fathers) drives people to seek their own support networks.
  • Shout-out to child-free friends who “fill the village” role for parents.

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3. Mom Group Dynamics According to Aura Color

(Starts ~14:52)

Indigo

• Absorbent empaths needing deep, meaningful conversations.
• Small, intimate groups preferred; dislike small talk and large cliques.

  “Indigos...can get very overwhelmed by small talk. They like to go straight to the deep stuff.”—Mystic Michaela (15:10)

Yellow

• Thrive with organization—seek stability/structure in the chaos of new parenthood.
• Often initiate/lead mom groups and combine self-improvement with community.

  “Maybe my life has done a 180, but there is playdate at 9am on Monday.”—Mystic Michaela (16:40)

Purple

• Changing energy; seek fun, non-judgmental friends who let them reconstruct/express new versions of themselves.
• Need freedom to still “laugh till I cry.”

Blue

• Seek kindness, collective caretaking, “village” vibes—a safe, supportive, family-like group.

  “Blues…like to feed people…they’re looking for family in a mom group.”—Mystic Michaela (20:32)

Turquoise

• Need acceptance of their unique, sometimes unconventional, parenting approaches.
• Value open-mindedness, communal, co-op style groups.

Pink

• Bring childlike joy; orchestrate playful experiences and “aesthetic dreams.”
• Need freedom from judgment for their enthusiastic, creative energy.

Red and Green

• Often less common in mom groups.
• Reds: fiercely independent, value practical help, “teammates,” not emotional support.
• Greens: earthy, non-helicopter, value life experience and research-based tips.

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4. When Mom Groups Turn Toxic: Warning Signs & Red Flags

(Starts ~30:37)

• Common Signs
  • Gossip as a pattern (not just venting or concern).
  • Feeling pressure to self-edit.
  • Superficial conversation, lack of vulnerability.
  • Significant phase mismatch (e.g., single parent among partnered parents).
  • Persistent bad vibes after gatherings (“Should feel good!”).
  • Overemphasis on material status, competition (“who said ‘cupcake’ first”; “whose child is the genius”).

    “If you notice that part of the group’s activity is to single someone out and constantly talk about them, guess who that’s gonna be eventually? You.”—Mystic Michaela (33:00)

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5. How Aura Patterns Can Show as Problematic Group Behavior

(Starts ~36:32)

Michaela dives into “problematic moms,” explaining how toxic behaviors can manifest through different aura colors:

• Yellow: Over-controlling, perfectionistic, queen bee, inflexible about group rules/vision.
• Purple: Gossip, passive-aggressive rebellion, “moving the vibration of the group to ostracize someone.”
• Indigo: Ghosts the group, withdraws silently.
• Blue: Easily victimized, hypersensitive, “take things personally without self-reflection.” May overstep and parent others’ kids.
• Turquoise: Become rigid about beliefs, easily hurt when group disagrees on fundamental things (e.g., vaccination stances).

  “A problematic turquoise…can be very stressed if people aren’t aligning with their beliefs.”—Mystic Michaela (44:05)

• Pink: Withdraw into their own joy, can become emotionally unavailable to others in the group.
• Green: May not include others, extremely independent, not attuned to social cues for inclusion.
• Red: Can be blunt, call people out with little emotional cushioning.

Notably, intention—not aura—is what makes these behaviors problematic.

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6. Listener Stories: Real-Life Mom Group Experiences

(Starts ~50:40)

Michaela and Scotty read listener-submitted stories from the “Mystic Michaela Spiritual Family” Facebook group, illustrating the episode’s themes:

• Ashley N. (Yellow, Pink, Purple): Struggled to form authentic connections with local moms who seemed to have “walls up,” especially with “yellow” moms who appeared to exclude her and her daughter.

  “Sometimes I feel like my aura automatically triggers them and they have no interest in getting to know me.”—Ashley N. (52:17)

• Bailey J. (Green-Turquoise): Realized after trying mom groups that she’s “good at doing my own thing... these groups feel like middle/high school cliques.” She finds support elsewhere and accepts her difference.

• Elizabeth M. (Yellow-Blue-Purple): Tried to fit into a “superficial” neighborhood group by shutting down her purple but got kicked out after questioning why everyone was obsessed with “rose bushes.” Now enjoys her “non-pruned butterfly tree” and newfound freedom.

• Katie C. (Pink-Blue): Only mom with a girl among “boy moms,” felt made to feel like “not a real mom.” Highlighted underlying toxicity and competition in the group dynamic.

  “I think it's just hard to be a mom in general, and there's so much toxicity and competition rather than support.”—Katie C. (56:56)

• Kim B. (Purple-Blue-Indigo): Became a mom at 19, experienced harsh judgment and exclusion based on age. Wore “fake red” energy for self-protection.

Theme: Many commenters identified their aura colors as central to how they experienced group connection or disconnection. Self-acceptance and finding others who “get it” was a common thread.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “We’re grasping at a village. We need that village, but sometimes it takes time to find the right village.” – Mystic Michaela (10:45)
• “Your kid is their own aura color too. That’s the other thing, guys.” – Mystic Michaela (37:36)
• “No matter what you do right, that group is eventually gonna end, because the kids are gonna grow up.” – Scotty (49:19)
• “It's not really the auras problem, it's more an intention problem.” – Mystic Michaela (61:14)

Comic Relief: Michaela and Scotty joke about competitive stroller racing, “queen bee” dynamics, and fantasize about a commune run by turquoise moms where none of these problems exist.

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 01:11 – Origin of episode topic: Ashley Tisdale mom-group drama
• 08:19 – Why parents/guardians join mom groups (identity shifts, social needs)
• 14:52 – Aura-by-aura analysis: what each color needs from a mom group
• 30:37 – Signs you’re in a toxic mom group
• 36:32 – Problematic behaviors by aura color
• 50:40 – Listener mom group stories
• 61:10 – Positive examples and closing thoughts on intention vs. aura

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Takeaways & Practical Advice

• Know yourself: Understanding your aura color (or personality type) can help you seek out or design communities that truly support and uplift you during challenging life stages.
• Intention matters: What brings toxicity isn’t the aura, it’s the intention and lack of self-reflection behind behaviors.
• It’s okay to leave: Whether you’re Ashley Tisdale or any parent feeling left out or drained, you are “allowed to leave” a group that doesn’t nourish you.
• Parenthood is inherently vulnerable: Groups form when confidence is lowest and pressure is highest—be gentle with yourself and others.
• Build a real village: Genuine support and spiritual connection are more important than surface similarities or status.

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For more, take the aura color quiz at KnowYourAura.com/quizzes and join the ongoing conversation in the Mystic Michaela Spiritual Family Facebook group.

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Transcript

[Scotty]

Foreign.

[Mystic Michaela]

Michaela spiritual family, welcome to know your aura with Mystic Michaela. Today we are talking about toxic mom groups and how your aura color functions in a mom group community. But first. Hey, Scotty.

[Scotty]

Hey, guys. Well, I remember when Bri was born.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah.

[Scotty]

I was in a mom group.

[Mystic Michaela]

Sure.

[Scotty]

You know, very toxic. Extremely toxic.

[Mystic Michaela]

Were you the toxic one?

[Scotty]

I was the toxic.

[Mystic Michaela]

Were you, like, everyone race strollers. Who's. Who has the fastest stroller? Yes.

[Scotty]

Well, we would compare stroller prices.

[Mystic Michaela]

Stroller prices.

[Scotty]

Like, who has the most expensive stroller? That was a big topic of conversation. It was interesting. Everyone's child in my mom's group was a genius. Everyone was a genius. Everyone was the first to clap, walk, smell true. You know, go to the potty. Whatever it was. Everyone was a genius.

[Mystic Michaela]

Mine rolled over first. He's a genius. He's a genius.

[Scotty]

Right? So, yeah, that's one of the. I think you got in trouble, but, yeah.

[Mystic Michaela]

Okay. That's really funny. Okay, well, I was the one in the mom group, and you were the one who was listening to my trials and tribulations.

[Scotty]

Yes. You would tell me your tales.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yes. But today we're talking about what your aura color needs from a mom group. But where did this originate? Where did this topic come from? Over on Substack, the. The chat aura culture and I were like, hey, can Mystic Michaela. Can you talk about this Ashley Tisdale drama? And I was just reading about it that day. I was like, oh, my gosh. So I thought that would be, like, a cool podcast topic.

[Scotty]

I thought that was someone that was in the chat on subsec. I didn't know who that was.

[Mystic Michaela]

Like, I don't know who. Ashley Tisdale. All right, so here it is. So Ashley Tisdale. And this is gonna be really short. This is just a. To surmise it, she is, like, an actress and a, you know, a singer, and she's famous. And she thought she finally found her mom village until it started, I guess, to feel more hurtful than helpful. But then in this past December, she wrote in her own, like, blog on her website, and she wrote this blog post titled, you're Allowed to Leave youe Mom Group, and it went viral. And she's like, oh, I felt left out, and it felt too high school. And I had to text them all and tell them this. And everyone's like, who's in our mom group? Some very other famous people. So it's kind of like everyone's like, oh, my gosh. Who's toxic? Because the people in our group are Hilary Duff, Mandy Moore, Meghan Trainor, and, like, a bunch of other kind of, like, some other influence. It's actually a really big mom group. Like, my indigo is like, ooh, no, thank you. But, like, it's some other influencers and whatnot. So I thought I'd go through just very quickly, because everyone's like, what are their aura colors? Just very quickly. But then we're gonna make it about you. You know what I mean? Like, the listener and your aura and what it is. So ash. So this is what I think happened. Okay. Like, there's this viral, like, group photo of them all. They're all wearing, like, matching sweatsuits. And in the middle is Hilary Duff. And if this. These are just strangers. Cause I do this for a living, guys. And you'll hand me, like, a picture of your friend group or whatever. And immediately all the energy usually goes to, like, the ringleader. And Hillary, to me, feels like the ringleader now. This doesn't mean it's negative. This doesn't mean it's positive. I just feel like she has more leadership energy in the group than the other girls. And I do feel like she's the center of the energy. And they all kind of listen and blossom and react to her and. And her, I guess, inclinations, if that makes sense. So she feels like the queen bee. She's yellow, purple. Hilary Duff has a yellow, purple aura. Yellow purples, I will say, are more decisive. They kind of know what they want. They're really good at understanding a group dynamic, you know, energetically, but also still organizing it. So I feel like she's the one kind of in charge of a lot of these things. And then when I look at Ashley Tisdale, she's purple blue, but she wears, like, a gsd get stuff done. Yellow aura color. So I feel like Ashley just. This is. And I don't know these people. This is just my feelings. I feel like she was like, who made. Who died and made you the queen of this group? Yeah, Know. Which is very purple blue of somebody to be. Which. I mean, it's just kind of okay. Like, just because you say it's happening at 4 or just we're meeting at this park, a little bit of rebellion might have been, like, this is annoying, you know? And then maybe she was pushing against it, and then maybe she stopped getting invited, you know? And then the other girls are going to fall to the leader, not to Ashley. And then when I look at Mandy Moore. Mandy Moore, I feel like if she wasn't an actress, would be, like, a Yellow indigo coastal granny that just lives in her world and can't be bothered because she's a. An actress. She's very blue to go. She's got, like a very private bubble or shell around her. She has yellow and she's got a little bit of a buttoned up vibe. But she does have purple. But I feel like that's from the industry. Honestly, it feels like it can stress her out or it's uncomfortable on her. So I get. She just doesn't want to be bothered is my long story short of this. And she's very protected. She doesn't like to be involved in drama or having. Have any sort of. If there's drama, if there's conflict, it's like she'll just kind of indigo out of it. That's kind of why I get with Mandy and then with Meghan Trainor. She has a really interesting aura color. She's kind of blue coys with yellow, purple. Meghan Trainor to me, feels like a little. And it's funny. Meghan Trainor and Ashley Tisdale, I think they're the only ones that still follow each other or something, because this Internet sleuths looked into that. And Meghan Trainor, to me, feels like she's just kind of like, shrug. Like, like neutral. What are you talking about? Like, either way, like, okay, whatever. Like, she's just too busy. She's too in her own life right now. Like, she can't give energy either way. So I feel like they invite her because she's Meghan Trainor, and they're like, oh, that's like. That's a great name to have in our group. You know, I do feel like. But I feel like with her, she's just like, okay, if it's neutral energy, I'll show up. If it's weird, I'll back out. Like, so I just don't get the investment from her. Does that make sense?

[Scotty]

Yeah, that makes sense. I mean, I have so many theories on this. Oh, and I'm just going to. Should I say my theories? I mean, does anyone really care? I'm not a mom, so it's like, I don't know. Even if I have a valuable.

[Mystic Michaela]

I feel like a lot of us moms have, like, partners that we tell these things. I.

[Scotty]

Look, this is what I would say. People are people, right?

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah.

[Scotty]

So we joked at the beginning, like, you know, the moms that you dealt with, you know, who said the word cupcake first? The first two syllables, you know?

[Mystic Michaela]

You mean, like, which kid said it first?

[Scotty]

Yeah, Right. Which kids said it first?

[Mystic Michaela]

Which kids are smartest?

[Scotty]

Exactly.

[Mystic Michaela]

That was always like, your pet peeve.

[Scotty]

Yeah, yeah. So I'm assuming with these people, like Hilary Dove, whatever. Meghan Trainor, they're like, which kid is, like, the best singer first or actress first or, you know, which one is gonna be the biggest Broadway star?

[Mystic Michaela]

Right.

[Scotty]

And they're probably all saying this to each other.

[Mystic Michaela]

Okay. Yeah.

[Scotty]

And look, I'm. I don't want to make fun of these people, but there seems like a little bit of a commonality that these. And I. I don't wanna be mean here, but they're not a list stars. Right.

[Mystic Michaela]

Okay.

[Scotty]

These are kind of like more. They had a moment.

[Mystic Michaela]

They're cult favorites. They're of a generation.

[Scotty]

Yes.

[Mystic Michaela]

They're millennial favorites.

[Scotty]

Yeah.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah.

[Scotty]

We're not dealing with, like, the Taylor Swifts of the world and the Leonardo DiCaprios here.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah.

[Scotty]

You know, we're dealing with people who had a moment, and maybe that moment's gone.

[Mystic Michaela]

Okay.

[Scotty]

And now they're all in this group together trying to get that moment.

[Mystic Michaela]

They're still. They're still hustling.

[Scotty]

They're still hustling.

[Mystic Michaela]

Okay, got it. Okay, I see what you're saying.

[Scotty]

So maybe, like, they're working.

[Mystic Michaela]

They're. They work really hard.

[Scotty]

Right?

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah, I get what you're saying.

[Scotty]

And maybe they're all trying to, you know, kind of like a Housewives episode where, like, you know, I did this, I did that.

[Mystic Michaela]

So you're saying it's competition?

[Scotty]

I think it's. I think it would be. Yeah. That's my theory.

[Mystic Michaela]

This is a competitive group.

[Scotty]

I think it's a very competitive mom group.

[Mystic Michaela]

A lot of mom groups are competitive.

[Scotty]

Yes.

[Mystic Michaela]

And that is something that we're going to talk about.

[Scotty]

Yeah. And I also noticed you said everyone has yellow.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah.

[Scotty]

And then this Ashley person is wearing yellow.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah.

[Scotty]

Probably seems like you have to have that in this group. Maybe in all mom groups.

[Mystic Michaela]

Well, I can see with Ashley, it was like, I don't want to follow your rules, you know? And then all of a sudden, it's like, oh, and they. They're not going to be outwardly mean to her. They're just going to stop that. Probably. She probably was left out. But sometimes, like, it's just not the group for you. That's the other thing. And that's what we're going to talk about today. Like, we can't expect to be in every group if it's. And we don't want to be.

[Scotty]

So I guess my question then Would be for you and all the moms out there.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah.

[Scotty]

Why do you join these?

[Mystic Michaela]

Why do we join these? What is wrong with us? Okay, yes, I. Let's talk about. Before we get into aura colors, let's talk about spirituality and community when you have a child. And if you're interested in more about like what child, you know, being a parent does to you spiritually. I did a whole episode on postpartum. I'll link it somewhere. But anyways, yeah, I. But when you. It's an identity shift. You're not who you are anymore. And while you love everyone in your life that you currently have, if they're not on the same page as you, like they're getting up every three hours with an infant and they're sleep deprived and their whole life is like, did my child burp? You know, what is in the diaper? Like, you are so in that thinking. That's your whole entire world. You kind of need other people to get it. Otherwise you feel so isolated, like on an island. So spiritually, to continue to just feel connected, you need to be around people who are in the same space as you. Mindfully, the problem is, is a lot of us tend to favor, okay, you know, you have a six month old, I have a six month old. That's the only thing we have in common. That's also the most biggest thing going on in our life and most important focus of our life right now. But that's also the only thing we have in common. And other than that, we're completely different people other than this one commonality. And that's where the problems happen. Because a lot of times we'll throw ourselves in groups just because, okay, well, they all have babies and I have a baby. So that's like throwing yourself on every date possible. Well, he's single and I'm single, so we should date. Like, not necessarily like we have to kind of like that one big life particularity. Doesn't make, doesn't make a friendship, doesn't make a connection fruitful long term. And so you're just so alone. In order to continue feeling connected to self and community and spirit and your growth, you are seeking out people that tend to share the same mind space as you. So I feel like that's the reason why we join and communities. The other thing is we aren't supported as mothers and fathers too. I don't want to, but I'm just making this a mom episode. Mothers aren't supported by society. It's like, okay, you had a baby. Go back to work and you have to figure out childcare and you have to, you have to do everything. And it's just like, it's like a lot of stress and it's a lot of like, oh my gosh, like free falling. So we do need other people to help us. So we are grasping at a village. We are grasping at a village. We need that village. But sometimes it takes time to find the right village. And that's what we're talking about today. To streamline it a little bit differently or also like find closure. If you didn't have the greatest experience with mom groups, maybe you're past that point in your life. You didn't have experience. And also I just want to give a little love to those of you who don't have kids. But you are that person to the people in your life with kids. These are the aunties, the best friends. Like, thank you for still going to your friend's house and understanding that this is what she's going to talk about. And she's going through something right now and you still show up and you're like, okay, we're just hanging out with the baby today. Cool. You know, like, thank you to you people too. Because then, then they don't have to go out and find other people. They have you. So thank you.

[Scotty]

Yeah, I guess you're. I guess to sum that up, you're in the same walk of life.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah.

[Scotty]

And it's, it's kind of like the kids choose the, the other. The adults that you're going to be hanging out with. Yeah. It's not that you've chose the person. Like maybe in college you chose a person or whatever, high school, but now your kid's choosing the person just because.

[Mystic Michaela]

You have a six month. I have a six month.

[Scotty]

Right.

[Mystic Michaela]

Should we best be best friends? Like, no.

[Scotty]

It's funny for you because like you did have a mom group with Bri, but then with Abby and there is six year difference between the two. I get. I don't remember you recall you having such a mom.

[Mystic Michaela]

I let that go.

[Scotty]

I think. Yeah. Maybe it was just.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah. Because I have a 16 year old and a 10 year old. So when my 16 year old was like a baby, I did all the things right. And I did not fit into any of them, by the way. And then the ones I did fit into, it was fine. It was just I'm always kind of like, maybe it's my Indigo. I, I'm always kind of like the extra or I was used to them, like not always inviting Me, I'm like, oh, whatever, you know? And I was just too tired to care. I'm better one on one like that. But, yeah, but with Abby, I was like, oh, screw that. Like, we're good.

[Scotty]

We're good. I got this.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah. Me and you, Abby, we be besties. We do not need a community. I don't think that's good either, but it worked for us.

[Scotty]

Yeah, well, whatever works for you, right? All right, we'll take a quick break, we'll come back. We're going to talk about moms groups in aura color.

[Mystic Michaela]

Hey, Scotty.

[Scotty]

Hey, guys.

[Mystic Michaela]

We are talking about Wild Grain. Yes.

[Scotty]

The box just came the other day.

[Mystic Michaela]

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[Scotty]

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[Mystic Michaela]

Like, I think my thing with Wild Grain is everything you eat, like, fills you up and makes you feel like, okay, I ate something. Yeah.

[Scotty]

And I don't know how the science behind it works, but I'm assuming that's like the sourdough, right? Yeah.

[Mystic Michaela]

And their chocolate croissants. They sent those in this month's box, too. And.

[Scotty]

Oh my gosh, you didn't eat them, did you? You. You ate my.

[Mystic Michaela]

Don't hate me.

[Scotty]

I bet you don't hate me. I bet I'm going right now.

[Mystic Michaela]

One's not enough.

[Scotty]

If there's one left, there better be one left.

[Mystic Michaela]

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[Scotty]

Hey, guys.

[Mystic Michaela]

All right, let's talk about what your aura color needs from a mom group. So as I go through each aura color, we're going to talk about, you know, the high vibrational and the nice connection that your aura might individually crave from this type of community so you can find the right ones.

[Scotty]

All right, so let's start with then indigos.

[Mystic Michaela]

Indigo. So indigos are, you know, absorbent empaths and which means they feel other people's feelings as their own and they can get very overwhelmed by a big group and they can get very overwhelmed by small talk. Indigo is kind of like to go straight to the deep stuff. So they really do crave a deeper connection, deep conversations, insight, spiritual insight. You know, it's kind of like therapy in a way that they like intimate groups. So maybe you don't want such a huge group or you, if you join a huge group, you're gonna expect to break off. Small talk has to be a limit. You know, you want more life affirming chats. Like, yes, you want to talk about how much did my baby spit up today? Like, is that normal? But like, you also want to be like, balance that with like, how are you growing? What, how are you parenting? You know, kind of like tying this into life purpose. So more deep talks, less small talk.

[Scotty]

Okay. Yeah. Maybe the perfect size would just be you and another person.

[Mystic Michaela]

It could just be a duo.

[Scotty]

A duo.

[Mystic Michaela]

It could be like four people.

[Scotty]

You know, smaller would work better.

[Mystic Michaela]

Smaller that everyone's on the same page. And then also people don't take it so personally if you take a minute to respond or you know, people that aren't so on top of you in that way, like where your energy and time is monitored by them and that, that's a good group for you too.

[Scotty]

Okay. All right. Yellow.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yellow auras. They, you know, yellows love organization and they like to give their world structure. So what happens when you have a baby? All that goes out the window. And yellow moms, I feel like from a, from a mom group, they really do crave a new sense of structure, foundation, support, stability, control. Like, okay, like maybe my life has totally done a 180, but there is play date at 9am and we're all meeting there on Monday. And at least that's going to happen, you know, like, so they, they like that sense of stability at this unstable time. This. And they also yellow aura moms in a group. They like to feel, okay, this is a new part of my life. You know, Yellows love self improvement. They love curiosity, they love to study themselves. So how can I take this chapter of my life, parenthood, and use it to improve myself? So, so I'll see yellow or a mom's like, oh, I'm doing baby yoga. You know, I'm doing yoga with the baby. You know, I'm doing baby pilates. I have a walking group. You know, they're doing something where they're meeting up and self improvement is combined with parenting, if that makes sense.

[Scotty]

Now I would think, and this is just my opinion, that the yellows are the one that first start your mom group. They could be the starter of a mom group. They might be the ones that obviously organize this mom group. Yeah, they could be the leaders even.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah.

[Scotty]

In these mom groups.

[Mystic Michaela]

That's true.

[Scotty]

And it's interesting because you said that, that Ashley. Tis right, she's a yellow purple and everyone was yellow. But that Ashley Tizzle was really purple blue. So she might have got that. And you said she got left out. Right. So that might, she might have got lost in the yellow shuffle kind of, you know, so to say a mom.

[Mystic Michaela]

Group might need a yellow aura right at, somewhere right at the helm.

[Scotty]

Yeah.

[Mystic Michaela]

Only because if a bunch of purples are running in, I don't know what's going on, you know. So like it would seem if it.

[Scotty]

Was a large yellow mom group. Yeah, you would, you would have to get that yellow on yourself. You have to, you have to, I would think, to stay in that group.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah. Just be. Just so that there's order to it and a sense of regularity so that other people can't. It's like school, you know, like somebody has to organize it, but we come and get something out of it. So it's responsibility. And then sometimes if a yellow aura is running a mom group, you know, they're like, okay, this is what I want out of it. So they're organizing it around their own vision and their own thoughts and ideas and things that they're interested in. So if you're doing that, you want to, you want to make sure you're getting like, like minded people that are on the same page as you too.

[Scotty]

Okay, what about purples?

[Mystic Michaela]

Oh, purples. You know, you have a baby, you're like, okay, I'm not gonna let this affect me or change me. I'm still Gonna. And then all of a sudden, you're like, oh, that was. I just lied to myself. Like, who am I? What's going on? I think purples have a heart. They. Purples, like, change, but the way that they go through change, even, you know, parenthood's, like, probably the biggest change you can go through one of them, and. And they kind of start from scratch. So sometimes they tear themselves down and rebuild. It's like, the only way they know to do it. So it's kind of like other moms. When you're a purple, you need that they can talk like this. You know, I used to do this. I'm still this person. I'm just rebuilding myself in a new way. I haven't lost myself. Is a big need for. For other purple. For purple moms to get out of a mom group. Like, I can still laugh till I cry. I can still feel connected as an actual, like, person, not just somebody that changes diapers. You know, I. I can have fun. I look forward to my mom. Girls, you know, we have a great time together. We laugh, we joke. We are not judgmental. It's a space where I feel comfortable and connected to this new identity as I grow it and build it and add to it or delete from it or, like, whatever. So. So you just need kind of fun people. Okay. In short, that you can laugh with, and they're not judging you.

[Scotty]

All right, what about the blues?

[Mystic Michaela]

Blue Auras love to help and assist and be part of community in general. They like to feed people. You know, they love your babies and their babies. Like, they're very into community and connection and support. They love the feeling of kindness and the collective, and they want this safe nest. Like, where's a safe nest for my baby to grow and your baby to grow, and they'll be friends forever, you know, so it's kind of finding other moms who are soft and kind and supportive and who also. They don't want to pit kids against each other. They don't. Like, this is about creating, not to overuse the word, but a village. I think blues are very concerned with having that village or where, I look out for your kid, you look out for my kid, you know, and if I miss something, you'll tell me, and if I miss something, I'll tell you. And it's a sense of, like, family. Blues are looking for family in, like, a mom group, a new type of family.

[Scotty]

All right, let's move on to. Should we do turquoises today?

[Mystic Michaela]

Oh, I think so.

[Scotty]

All right. We're Gonna include the turquoise.

[Mystic Michaela]

I love my turquoise moms.

[Scotty]

We always include them now.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yes, we do.

[Scotty]

We got so much. I got so much slack for not sometimes including the turquoise.

[Mystic Michaela]

The Turks.

[Scotty]

But now we, we go above and beyond, sure that they're in.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yes, Turquoises, Turks. Okay. I love my turquoises because these turquoise moms crack me up. Okay, so turquoises, very absorbent, Very much like, okay. You know, they, they're kind of all over the place, but once they focus, they get like laser focused on something. So when you have a baby and you're a turquoise, you're like, I am going to. And then sometimes they like get stuck on something. Like, there will be no gluten in this home. I don't mean to pick on you. Or we will not have chemicals in our cleaning agents anymore. And they're doing it out of love and just a conviction. And they do need to be around other mothers who get that. Maybe they're not following it, but they do understand that. So when your kid comes over, we're not having the gluten. You know what I mean? Or, you know, like whatever it is, like, they, they're not going to ridicule you for it. They're going to love you for it. They're not going to judge you for it. And then also turquoise is. They like community in a collaborative way. So how do we explore new concepts? You know, how do we vent? How do we think without judgment? They're a little bit of a turquoise moms in a group, I think, want kind of a commune vibe or a co op vibe where we're all doing this together. There's no judgment. But also we're free thinkers. So they need like free thinking moms that don't. That don't say no to something right away. They're just like, okay, I hear you. Let me be open to that.

[Scotty]

Okay.

[Mystic Michaela]

Okay.

[Scotty]

All right. A pink joy bubble mom enters the room.

[Mystic Michaela]

Pink moms.

[Scotty]

Pink moms.

[Mystic Michaela]

Pink moms. A lot of pink moms revert back to. So pinks are like forever kiddo energy. They're very. They're adults and they know how to make decisions and, and they can think for themselves. And they're totally self sufficient. They just haven't lost that sense of wonder or that access to joy. And being a parent can open that up for them all over again. And pink moms, I notice, love to be in charge of. We're doing this play date. It's gonna work like this. This is. We're having this craft and they get into it the Same as the kids do. And they start to think, like, the kids do too. They're like, oh, we need more sparkles, or. Or we're gonna do it this way, or we need cupcakes. Pinks and yellows have a lot in common, and that is the vision. So when pink moms have some sort of vision for a mom group, it is. We're gonna make moments together. We're gonna have fun together. We're gonna collectively have the joy bubble around us as we do this together. Very in the moment with their kids. And sometimes a lot of their dreams can be a little aesthetic, too. You know, like, we're going to do it this way. It has to be this color. They can get stuck on things like that. But you kind of need people that don't feel like that's naive. They don't. They're not going to judge you for it. They're not going to call you, you know, airheady, or they're not going to label you for getting as into it as your kids are, if that makes sense.

[Scotty]

Okay.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah.

[Scotty]

All right. Bring on the reds.

[Mystic Michaela]

So reds. I have to lump, like, reds and greens together because it is hard to find them in mom groups.

[Scotty]

Oh, okay.

[Mystic Michaela]

They're in that. They're usually. If they're in a mom group. How do I put it? They don't care if they're left out or not.

[Scotty]

Yeah. That's like me, you know, when I was in my red. You know, I'm red, and I was in that mom group, I didn't care.

[Mystic Michaela]

They don't care. Like, you lost. And they. They would never sit and be like, oh, was that personal that I was left that. There's a separate group chat or something? Like, they would never even. That wouldn't occur to them. They'd. Even if they notice it, they'd be like, whatever, and move on. You know, I will give that to reds. But red moms, what do they need from a mom group? Reds are very independent, and they're very physically active, and they don't want to give up their own life goals just because they've gained new ones through parenthood. So they're. They're very big on merging. Like, I am a mom, and I will do all the things I need to do as a mom, but I'm also this career, and I will do all the things I need to do as a career, or I am also an athlete, and I will continue to do all these things. An athlete. Like, whatever it is, they're not gonna sacrifice that. Which and they, and they look for a mom community that helps them, that really helps them make sure that. I'll watch your kids, you watch my kids. You support me, I support you. I don't tell you you can't do it. You don't tell me I can't do it. Like, it's a lot of supportive vibrations and affirmations and also like active help, a lot of that. Like, well, what do you need? What do you need from me today? And I'll do that for you and then you'll do that for me. So they kind of need teammates as a mom group. And then greens. Green moms are so earthy. Right. And they're very like, how do I put it? I think in our current culture, a lot of moms are told to maybe inadvertently told to be helicopters. Super. Not the green way. You know, green moms are kind of. And, and they. So they can't be in a mom group that would judge them for that. Like, so green moms need a community that is a little bit earthy with them.

[Scotty]

Okay.

[Mystic Michaela]

You know, so like, we're learning together. We're valuing physical confidence. My kid is wearing this outfit today and it does not match. And also we do not care. That stupid. Like, it's fine. Um, like things like that, like, they, they value more like life experience. Moms coming together and giving practical advice. Research based, you know, help. Not always emotional. Mushy. Reds and greens aren't as mushy emotionally. They're great listeners. So greens are great listeners. And they'll listen and, and they want other moms that do that too. Like, well, let's listen and then if there's a solution, I'll give it to you. But then hopefully you figure it out from there. Right. Because I already said that we're not going to like, keep bringing it up and up and up and up and up. They don't understand that.

[Scotty]

So now I have to say yes. And I don't get anxiety often. Oh, but you going through this list. Oh, gave me a lot of anxiety.

[Mystic Michaela]

Did it?

[Scotty]

Yes. For. For moms and future moms.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah.

[Scotty]

Because let's go through this quickly now. If you listen to this podcast, most likely you know your aura colors and if you don't, that's your goal for this year, to finally get confirmed. We said that in the first episode.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah. So many ways to do it.

[Scotty]

And now we're saying that most likely you're not choosing your mom group. Your child's choosing the mom group for you. Right. So I can See, with all these ways that these people think and I didn't, you know, back when Bri was in her. When you were in the mom group the first time, I didn't really think this way. But now with knowing how each color thinks within the mom group, this seems like a recipe for absolute disaster.

[Mystic Michaela]

It is. It can be.

[Scotty]

Right? The way you were describing all these. All right, so I want to calm down, I want to take a quick break.

[Mystic Michaela]

Okay.

[Scotty]

We come back, we're going to talk about if, when the group gets toxic, what are the problems that could arise in these groups?

[Mystic Michaela]

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[Scotty]

Hey, guys.

[Mystic Michaela]

Okay, so you're right. This could be an easy recipe for a toxic mom group.

[Scotty]

Yes.

[Mystic Michaela]

So we're going to talk about signs you're in a toxic mom group and then we're going to talk about aura color. Problematic moms like how these signs of toxicity can manifest in aura color in different moms.

[Scotty]

Yeah. And then with all the. All these moms not knowing their aura colors.

[Mystic Michaela]

Oh, I know.

[Scotty]

This is problems. We gotta get this. We gotta get this fixed.

[Mystic Michaela]

This is my goal. Everyone needs to know their aura color so that at least you know what you're looking for in the mom group. I'm not saying, like, you're gonna land in the right mom group immediately, but you'll know, like, ooh, I gotta. I gotta piece out of this one and look for a new one. Yeah, you gotta look around. It's like dating guys. It's real awkward.

[Scotty]

I'm gonna tell you, I've never felt more that people just need to know their oracle.

[Mystic Michaela]

Right. Plus, you're exhausted. That's the other thing. You're just like, I'm too tired to make friends. These are. This is what I got.

[Scotty]

Well, I knew I was in a toxic mom group, so how did I know this?

[Mystic Michaela]

Okay, let's see. How do you know you're in a toxic mom? I mean, the first one is gossip. I mean, it always. It's hard to avoid. You know, I think when people get together, they make observations. It's kind of what we do. The thing, though, is when it starts getting real nasty or when you still. You notice it being, like, a pattern, or when I think, like, gossip is one. How do. There's gossip and then there's like, we notice something, and then we're bringing it to the person we're talking about's attention. You know, like, if it in. In a way that's kind that. That's not gossip. That's like, oh, you know, here we're coming to you like a sisters, like that kind of thing. But gossip. If. If you. In the. If you notice that part of the group's activity is to single someone out and constantly talk about them, guess who that's gonna be? Eventually it's gonna be you. You know, so if you're participating or if you're just noticing it or you're observing, just notice like, oh, that's the group pattern. And that's really toxic. They just do it for fun, not to help anyone. Another thing is you feel like you're showing up to mom group and you're editing yourself. You're like, I can't say this. I can't say that I don't believe in that. I can't say that I'm not doing that for my kid. I can't say that I don't want to send my kid to that school because everyone's going to freak out. I like, you know, you should be allowed to say how you feel and what you're comfortable with. And people around you, like, you know, they don't always have to agree, but at least they can give you support and love as long as you're doing it in a supporting and loving way too. Or you don't feel like you're on the same page spiritually, which is like, you know, if you're listening to this podcast, chances are you're a woo woo girly. Even if you're on the down low about it. Like, you know people, if you know everything superficial, it's going to get to you, you know, or people don't believe in things or they don't. Or they're too like 3D. Like everything's about materialism or, or what we have or labels or it's about social class or things like that that is going to, that's like a vibration that could affect you and you don't want to be with people that, that's how they measure success, you know, based on things or status. Also another sign you're in a toxic mom group. Nobody talks about anything deep, you know, like nobody's ever. It's one thing, if it's like the first couple times you're meeting, fine. But if you notice that people aren't getting a little deeper or you notice people aren't sharing a little deeper, you notice people aren't being vulnerable, that could be like a red flag that these people aren't in it forever. They might just be in it in kind of like, well, whatever. I don't want to give myself to this. I just need other people that I can talk to about the stuff I want to talk to. So you might not be fostering connections that way. Your phase is different. Is another sign you're in a toxic mom group. Like maybe you work and all the women are stay at home moms. You know, like that might just be not even toxic. It just might not be good for you. Or maybe you're a single mom and everybody else is in a marriage. Little things like that, it's not necessarily everyone's fault or your fault. It just might not be the group for you. And you're making yourself like a square peg in a round hole. Like, don't do that to yourself. Make it easier where you can. And finally, you just don't feel good after you hang out with them. I mean, after you hang out with your mom group, you should feel good if you don't feel good. That's a red flag. Nobody knows what they're doing. This is what I know. Sixteen years after being hecked inherently. So that. That really gets me now.

[Scotty]

It's true. Like. Like, there's no manual. Like, there's no manual. They give you this person, they say, yeah.

[Mystic Michaela]

They're like, all right, Use a car seat. You're like, wait, what? I mean, you let me take this home.

[Scotty]

I mean, I had no idea. I still don't know. Any idea what I'm doing?

[Mystic Michaela]

Well, the fourth. Well, the oldest are always the one.

[Scotty]

You're like, yeah, yeah, yeah. We have two, so we don't know, like, the third and the fourth.

[Mystic Michaela]

Oh, my gosh. I bet you guys with the third and fourth kids, it's like, yeah, those are the front. Those are the friends I'd want in my mom group if I ever did it again. I'd be like, I want the people that have four kids.

[Scotty]

Yeah.

[Mystic Michaela]

And I want to be in their mom.

[Scotty]

Even with the second one, Abby, you know, me, myself, I had, like, much more confidence.

[Mystic Michaela]

Sure.

[Scotty]

The first one, I had zero confidence. So.

[Mystic Michaela]

So not only are these mom groups being formed, they're being formed when you don't have a lot of confidence in yourself. And that's normal.

[Scotty]

Yes.

[Mystic Michaela]

But there's, like, a lot of pressure on you.

[Scotty]

Yes.

[Mystic Michaela]

Because it's very stressful.

[Scotty]

Of course.

[Mystic Michaela]

So what are. How do these problems. How do problematic moms just, like, how do their auras display that? Now it's like, a great place to say auras aren't excuses, but they do explain behavior. Intention is your own. Intention is not an aura problem. It's your own free will problem. So you get. If you have a bad intention or a good intention, your aura just kind of manages the patterns of that, not the reasons behind it. Does it? I hope.

[Scotty]

Yes.

[Mystic Michaela]

Okay, good.

[Scotty]

Yes.

[Mystic Michaela]

Because now I'm going to throw some of you under the bus. Okay. So yellow.

[Scotty]

We're throwing everyone under the bus.

[Mystic Michaela]

Here we go.

[Scotty]

Including ourselves.

[Mystic Michaela]

Okay. We'll start with yellows.

[Scotty]

Okay.

[Mystic Michaela]

So this is, like, a problematic yellow. They're too planned. They're too themed. They're too perfectionistic. They kind of get queen bee on you, and you start getting thrown out of the group if you're, like, five minutes late.

[Scotty]

Right, Right. Okay. But here's, like, here's the thing. Now that we know this. Okay. Now that I know a yellow and a purple.

[Mystic Michaela]

Right.

[Scotty]

So let's say there's a purple in this group with the yellow leader.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah.

[Scotty]

But then I can see so many problems coming from that. Like the yellow mom again, I don't want to say that they're judgy or anything, but they could just start saying, why is she doing the raising of her kid that way?

[Mystic Michaela]

Right.

[Scotty]

So now this purple mom, let's say, is, you know, letting her.

[Mystic Michaela]

I don't kid wear boots.

[Scotty]

Right. Or eat ice cream and eat ice cream past midnight or something. And now then you have, let's say a yellow mom or any other mom now saying, wait a second, why are you doing that? Right. And then they're talking about that with the other moms.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah, this could be.

[Scotty]

This is disastrous.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah. Also, also, your kid is their own aura color too.

[Scotty]

Right.

[Mystic Michaela]

That's the other thing, guys.

[Scotty]

Right?

[Mystic Michaela]

So, like, you might be this demure, chill person. I'm talking about myself here. And then you have a red, purple kid as your first one, Right. And she's like hitting everybody and you're like, oh, my God, what do I do? Like, I don't know what to do. And everyone's like. And they're judging until they get their second or third. And you're like, yeah, I told you. Like, God just gives you something, you know? Anyways, so.

[Scotty]

Right. Because you have a purple indigo. You raising a red purple.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah. I'm like, I don't know. I can't.

[Scotty]

I don't know what. Right?

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah. So.

[Scotty]

Oh, my God.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah, It's a lot. But yeah. So yellows can be problematic when they're a little too controlling over their vision.

[Scotty]

Okay.

[Mystic Michaela]

And then they. They get. Yeah.

[Scotty]

Okay, so now let's take the purple.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah. Because they're not. This is a problematic purple problem. Gossip. I mean, I always say the purples, I mean, they just read people to filth anyways. So if you have an intention, that's already not great.

[Scotty]

Right.

[Mystic Michaela]

It's very easy for a purple to sway the entire group. That someone's a big weirdo.

[Scotty]

Right.

[Mystic Michaela]

Or someone's like, you know, they're having problems or da, da, da, da. Like, you like, purples are really good at moving the vibration of the group to ostracize somebody. They can work underneath the layers to move the group vibrationally that way. And then inner circles can start to form. Now we have an inner circle also.

[Scotty]

Also the purple. Couldn't the purple try to get under the yellow skin? Because they're a little rebellious and maybe they don't want to go to the park at noon. They can't.

[Mystic Michaela]

Passive aggressive purples, right?

[Scotty]

I'm not showing up at noon. Really?

[Mystic Michaela]

If you're a problematic purple, very easy to piss off the problematic yellow, Right? You know, like, oh, it's a. I don't know. It's Adora the Explorer theme party. And then your kid comes dressed as Rapunzel, right? Oh, she's Rapunzel. It's like, but this is Jorah the Explorer. It's like, okay, well, she's Rapunzel. Well, she can't be in the pictures. And then the whole group's like. And then you can turn everybody against the yellow. You know, it's. It's.

[Scotty]

It's.

[Mystic Michaela]

It's funny. All right. If it weren't true, right?

[Scotty]

All right, we got the Indigos.

[Mystic Michaela]

Oh, Indigos.

[Scotty]

They've already left.

[Mystic Michaela]

They just. They're gone.

[Scotty]

They left. They left the toxic group. They left the problem. You don't know where they are. You're trying to find her.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah, the problem with Indigo is, like, when they get problematic, they're just. They just ghost.

[Scotty]

They're gone.

[Mystic Michaela]

And then you're like, hey, I thought we connected how to talk. And they're, like, not answering their texts, right? And they change. They've changed their whole schedule to avoid library hour with you, right? And you're like. You run into their husband at the grocery store. You're like, hey, where is Sheila?

[Scotty]

Right?

[Mystic Michaela]

She doesn't return my calls. And they're like. Like, in their heads, they're like, oh, she did it again. She ghosted. And now I gotta deal with this person. Yeah. So that's a problematic Indigo problem. They just, like, poof. Without telling you why.

[Scotty]

Okay, blues, Blues.

[Mystic Michaela]

The blue problematics, they just. They're very sensitive, okay? When they're pro. When they get problematic, they get very sensitive. And then they get very victimized without any self reflection. So it's like, oh, my God, Sheila didn't invite me to the cupcake party at the park. And that was totally on purpose. And it's like, hey, did you ever not invite somebody to something? Like, they're not thinking, like, maybe they, like a problematic blue doesn't think. Like, well, maybe they didn't mean to. Or maybe it wasn't their intention. Or maybe they're just exhausted.

[Scotty]

Yeah.

[Mystic Michaela]

Or maybe they just forgot to include you on the group text. Like, chill out. Or maybe just, like, text them and be like, hey, is there a cupcake party? I can come too, right? Everything's cool, you know? Like, they don't do that.

[Scotty]

So. All right, now what about this one? And I don't know if these are blues that do this. But you were talking about, like, blues earlier. Sense of community, raising them kind of the same. Like, okay, now I'm a red, right. And I'm in my mom group.

[Mystic Michaela]

Right.

[Scotty]

And now there's. Let's say there's blue mom.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah.

[Scotty]

I don't want to call it the blues, but let's say there is a blue mom.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah.

[Scotty]

And all of a sudden she starts parenting my kid.

[Mystic Michaela]

Oh, a problematic.

[Scotty]

Right.

[Mystic Michaela]

Like, oh, you know.

[Scotty]

You know, don't do it this way. We do it this way. And like, I'm a red. Right. And maybe that's the right way, too. It could be the right way, but it's not my way. Well, and sometimes. Sometimes the m. They do they.

[Mystic Michaela]

That's a good question.

[Scotty]

Some moms do over.

[Mystic Michaela]

How do you deal with a mom that parents your kid? Yes, I've dealt with that. Yes, I think we've all dealt with it.

[Scotty]

Everyone, probably.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah. Like, you're all right now having a vision flash in your head of when the other mom took your kid to the side and started yelling at your flipping kid.

[Scotty]

Or they told your kid, like, this is how we do it.

[Mystic Michaela]

Right.

[Scotty]

And that's. And it could be the right way. I'm not saying it's the wrong way.

[Mystic Michaela]

Well, it depends.

[Scotty]

But it's not your way.

[Mystic Michaela]

It depends on the situation.

[Scotty]

Right.

[Mystic Michaela]

Well, that's not the right way to do it. You have to talk to the parent first.

[Scotty]

Right.

[Mystic Michaela]

You can't just talk to the kid unless it's like an immediate danger situation. Obviously, like that. But if it's not, then you have to. Yeah, yeah. But do the blue moms do that? And I feel like all the moms. I think every. I think that's just a mom thing.

[Scotty]

Okay. Like.

[Mystic Michaela]

Like it could be a mom thing. And that's why it's important to have really good relationships with your mom friends. So that if your mom friend does something. And you know what? This is actually. And I don't want to just put this on the blues.

[Scotty]

No.

[Mystic Michaela]

But I will say that now that you mention it, this is a blue thing. Because when their kid gets hurt or maybe your kid took that kid's toy or something, that blue mom gets immediately victimized. Like, so your kid violated my kid. And then it triggers, like, them somehow, and then they can start getting really mean to your kid. So that is a. That is a problematic blue problem. Yes.

[Scotty]

Okay.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah, I've seen. Actually, now you mention it. Yeah.

[Scotty]

Yeah.

[Mystic Michaela]

Oh, my gosh. Yeah, I've seen that.

[Scotty]

Yeah. I mean, I don't Know, you have a. This could really. I could really see where red, yellows.

[Mystic Michaela]

They can carry the victimization for their kid. And then a yellow might be like, don't talk to my kid like that. Or like a purple or a red for sure. The green might be like, what happened? Let's talk about it.

[Scotty]

Right.

[Mystic Michaela]

What's going on? Like, they don't get immediately, like, triggered. A purple just might be like, oh, don't. I'm just gonna slap you. Like, or something like, verbally slap you now.

[Scotty]

Here. Okay. So income. The turquoise.

[Mystic Michaela]

Oh, turquoise.

[Scotty]

But I could see them getting a lot of. If they. If you don't know you're a turquoise and you're in one of these mom groups. Yeah. And you're doing your thing, which you say is a little bit off the beaten path.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yes.

[Scotty]

And these yellow moms, red moms, and all the other moms are looking at you like, what are you doing? This could be real problematic.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah. But let's say you're a problematic turquoise, though. So I think problematic turquoises can be a little bit like blues. But I think they can also get very stressed if people aren't aligning with their beliefs right now. I'm just gonna say something which is controversial, but I don't care because every single mom has heard this. I'm gonna talk about vaccinations.

[Scotty]

Oh, boy.

[Mystic Michaela]

A lot of times. And I'm not just saying all turquoises. But, like, that is a hot topic with moms these days. And that is. I'm not saying they're good. I'm not saying they're bad. I'm just saying I get my kids vaccinated. You do? You. You know what I mean?

[Scotty]

Sure.

[Mystic Michaela]

But I'm just saying that is a hot topic. So let's say some mom comes in and let's say it's. It's like, I believe in it or I don't believe in it. Okay. Then the other moms can, you know, a problematic one can be like. But my way is the only way.

[Scotty]

Right.

[Mystic Michaela]

Like that. And that can be a problem for sometimes I think problematic turquoises, a little bit. Like, they have a belief that's so firm that if you disagree with it, they can get, like, hurt inside. Like, like emotionally hurt.

[Scotty]

So vaccinations are like. Like politic talk.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yes, yes.

[Scotty]

Like, stay away from the vaccination talk.

[Mystic Michaela]

No, don't talk about that. Like, that's like religion, politics, vaccination.

[Scotty]

Vaccination. Yeah. Moms. But then there's the problem because, like, if you're In. I assume if you're in this mom group.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah.

[Scotty]

You're gonna wanna know if all the kids are vaccinated or not vaccinated.

[Mystic Michaela]

It's really stressful, you guys. And I think all the moms of new. Of babies right now are having, like, a lot of stress.

[Scotty]

Okay.

[Mystic Michaela]

Because you're like, okay, I don't want to bring my kid to the group. If. If you don't vaccinate at home.

[Scotty]

Right. Like, if you didn't get the measles.

[Mystic Michaela]

Shot, you know, or if you have older kids that never got vaccinated, they could give my younger kids measles or like. Like, things like that. And.

[Scotty]

And.

[Mystic Michaela]

And I'm. I. It is controversial to talk about it makes everybody else stressed out because we don't want to fight. But. But at the same two things can be true. It's also very relevant right now, and it's something that's happening a lot. So you kind of want to. Kind of want to hang out with people that do the same thing you do.

[Scotty]

Okay.

[Mystic Michaela]

I think with that. But it can be. But I guess, like, the problem is, is when people get their feelings really twisted about it one way or the other. Yeah. And it's just. It's just. It's very compounding. It's a hard time to be a mom or dad right now.

[Scotty]

All right, in comes the pink with the joy bubble. Everything's super duper great. What's the problem?

[Mystic Michaela]

I think a problematic pink, like, they just kind of like, if you're talking too much, they don't hear you, or if you're not doing what they want to do, they just shut you out.

[Scotty]

Right.

[Mystic Michaela]

So you're just like, did you even hear what I said? And they're like. They won't say this, but their vibe is like, not really, and I don't care.

[Scotty]

Or they. Or their kid comes dressed as a princess.

[Mystic Michaela]

Right.

[Scotty]

To, like, the library, social or whatever.

[Mystic Michaela]

That's fine. That's like a you problem if you have a problem with that. It's more kind of like, if you're a problematic pink, maybe you shut people out quicker or more frequently than maybe you should. You know, like, that joy bubble has, like, it's a little thicker.

[Scotty]

All right. What about the greens?

[Mystic Michaela]

I hate to say, like, I'm saying it again, like, greens and reds aren't too bad because they're not in them that much. They just don't care to be part of your group as much.

[Scotty]

Right.

[Mystic Michaela]

Greens are just so independent, like, almost. I guess a problematic green would Be like, they're independent to a fault, but maybe they just don't. They're like, not, like, include me.

[Scotty]

Cool.

[Mystic Michaela]

I won't include you. I won't even think about including you. You know, like that on the flip side, so you might be like, I'm always inviting Greenor to everything, and she never invites me to one thing. It's like, well, she's not thinking about doing that, right? Nor would she invite anyone, really. Unless you're kind of like around her at the time she's making the choice.

[Scotty]

Or maybe like they just all kind of meet up at the science museum. They're not even part of the group, but they form a group while they're at the science museum.

[Mystic Michaela]

Green mom and their kids, they crack me up. They're always. If you see them out in the wild, turquoises are a little bit like this too. But they're dressed more kind of hippie. But like, green moms, everyone's kind of wearing very practical clothes. And they're always learning something. Like, green mom is constantly teaching them something that I probably need to learn too. They're like, that's Android. Like, that's. That's the north star. And following. Like, there's like planetarium talk. Or meanwhile, like with my kids, I'm like, making up goofy songs and stuff because I'm purple. But green moms are like, let's. Oh, everyone, let's take a look at this plant. There's the seed. There's the seed follicle. I don't even know. Like, yeah, what's germination, Tommy? You know, like that. And like, they're always teaching. So I can see, like, other mom groups being like, that's boring or something. They might not find. Then that's not even problematic. I. I went off topic. That's just like green mom behavior. So their groups are kind of just like themselves a little bit. And then red or imams are not really mushy emotionally in general, but then a problematic red might be, like, very honest about that.

[Scotty]

You know, like, they're going to maybe call you out.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah, like, what. What's wrong with you? Like, why would you talk about that? Like, out loud? Like, I'm not your therapist.

[Scotty]

We're not doing this.

[Mystic Michaela]

Like, then that's.

[Scotty]

Yeah, we're not doing.

[Mystic Michaela]

That's really stupid idea. Or they might even say, but they might just be a little bit too direct and aggressive.

[Scotty]

Right.

[Mystic Michaela]

Whereas, like, a non problematic red says it in different ways. You know, maybe they use their empath color to kind of like, Say something that needs to be said that softer, but maybe a problematic. Red's just like your kids, not smarter than mine. So stop saying it like that.

[Scotty]

There's just so many problems. I don't. I don't. Here's the good news. No matter what you do right, that group is eventually gonna end because the kids are gonna grow up.

[Mystic Michaela]

You know what? There is a way out, guys.

[Scotty]

There's gonna be a way out. That's all I could tell you. But, yeah, this just seems like I said, this is causing anxiety in me, and I don't usually get it.

[Mystic Michaela]

It's causes as I talk about it, and I'm not even in it anymore. It gives me and Because I'm triggered from when I went through it back then, you know, like, how do I ask somebody? Like, how do I do this? How do I say this? Like, how do I navigate this? Who's gonna be mad at me? Like, it's so much.

[Scotty]

Yeah. All right, well, a lot of Mystic Michaela spiritual family members are moms.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yes.

[Scotty]

Great moms.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yes.

[Scotty]

And we. And they. We. You put up a thread.

[Mystic Michaela]

I did.

[Scotty]

And there's so many stories. We're gonna go through them. We'll check it out in a second.

[Mystic Michaela]

Hey, Scotty.

[Scotty]

Hey, guys. Okay, so if you go on to the Mystic Michaela spiritual family on Facebook, you'll find this thread. Actually, it's. You know, I read through it. It's really. I wish I would have had this info.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah, you were loving it.

[Scotty]

I love it.

[Mystic Michaela]

I wish I had this info, too.

[Scotty]

I mean. And honestly, if you do have someone that you know is open to auras and this kind of thing, maybe share this episode with them or share that thread with them. It's really helpful.

[Mystic Michaela]

I think it's helpful. It makes you feel not alone in the very least.

[Scotty]

Yeah, it definitely does. All right, why don't you start?

[Mystic Michaela]

I'll start. And there's so many.

[Scotty]

There's so many. And they're all great.

[Mystic Michaela]

I definitely. Ashley. They are great, and they're so, like, vulnerable. And I really appreciate you guys, as always. Ashley. N. Okay.

[Scotty]

Okay.

[Mystic Michaela]

Her colors are yellow, pink, and purple.

[Scotty]

Okay.

[Mystic Michaela]

All right, so right off the bat, yellow, pink, and purple. She's going to be kind of like the pink, you know, and the purple. I can see people kind of just like, oh, what's her deal? You know, it's a unique aura combo. So she wrote. I. All right. My discussion groups know this about me. Shout out to the waffles and the Doritos, but I've Been trying to build relationships with local moms. I go on coffee meetups, some play dates, all the school events. I volunteer often at the school, and I take my daughter to lots of birthday parties. But I feel like there are walls around everyone, including myself, where we just can't let loose and be fully authentic. So it can be awkward and people rush home. I went on a really fun play date with a group of moms a few weeks ago. And. And I was there authentically as me, dressed like me. I felt like we all had a good time, and I clicked particularly well with the purple moms. But I haven't seen them since. I saw one of the yellow moms recently, and she acted like she didn't know me.

[Scotty]

Oh.

[Mystic Michaela]

Oh. My daughter is a best friend at school for the past three years. They play together every day at recess. I've reached out to the mom several times, asking if we can all meet up at the park. She either says no or ghosts me. Her daughter recently told me that she isn't allowed to play with my daughter, although she does anyway at school. School. Her mom's very yellow. Sometimes I feel like the moms around here all have their. The cat.

[Scotty]

That's the cat.

[Mystic Michaela]

That's our cat.

[Scotty]

Having a sneezing thing during Ashley's story.

[Mystic Michaela]

Sorry. I feel like Ashley would be okay with that.

[Scotty]

Yeah, I do, too.

[Mystic Michaela]

Let's see. Sometimes I feel like the moms around here all have their secret clubs that are status social climbing base. And sometimes I feel like my. My aura automatically triggers them and they have no interest in and getting to know me. Yeah, I agree.

[Scotty]

What's Ashley's colors again?

[Mystic Michaela]

She's yellow, pink, and purple. See, she's so authentic and so herself and has no shield because she's secure with who she is. That these people who have walls around them are immediately terrified and triggered and would have to access that part of themselves to engage with her. That's what's going on.

[Scotty]

And it's. You know, obviously these women don't know pink auras. They don't know what pink auras are all about.

[Mystic Michaela]

If they knew that, if they knew, she'd be totally fine, they'd understand. She's fun.

[Scotty]

Maybe we need a mom discussion group, Mr. McCaleb. Spiritual mom.

[Mystic Michaela]

Not even jokingly helpful. Yeah.

[Scotty]

All right. So I got. I picked Bailey J. And I just picked her because, you know, you were talking about how greens don't need the groups and the turquoises feel like an outsider. So I thought this one just fit just as an example. So Bailey is green and turquoise. You call that green Coys who wears blue at times I've tried to become part of mom groups and I've realized it's just not for me. For a while I felt like I was missing out, but I've come to the conclusion that most of these groups just feel like middle high school cliques playing themselves out again and again. I'm either triggered by people or allowing my boundaries to be crossed when I try to fit in with moms at my kids school. So I'm good at doing my own thing and finding support elsewhere. And that. I like that one. Good for you. And she knows her colors and that's probably very helpful. And yeah, I just picked this one because I think it fits what we were talking about with the aura combos.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah, greens and green and turquoises are very introspective. They can be very layered. And I love that she's not internalizing that. Is there something wrong with her? She knows that. You know what? I'm just different than a lot of these people. And that's why at some point we all need to live on a mystic Michaela spiritual family commune where the turquoise run it and none of this will ever be a problem again.

[Scotty]

There was also a lot of other greens and turquoises in the thread that said basically the same thing.

[Mystic Michaela]

It seems like a green slash turquoise thing.

[Scotty]

Yes.

[Mystic Michaela]

Which is interesting. All right, I have Elizabeth M. She wrote this. I was in a very superficial neighborhood moms group and I was leading with my yellow blue and trying to act the demure mom role to fit in, laugh at the jokes. But pretty soon my purple started showing with absolutely zero tolerance for the gossip about lawns like, omg, we're floating on a rock. Why is everyone so pressed about Sally across the street's rose bushes not being pruned? I got kicked out once I started to ask the elephant in the room out loud, why are we so worried about the rose bushes? The roses look pretty or whatever the group was. I kept asking why and got kicked out of the group chat really quick. They still host parties in their front lawn and I assume still making fun of me and my very non pruned butterfly tree. But the freedom of no longer giving a crap is a high I'll live off for years to come.

[Scotty]

What color? What color?

[Mystic Michaela]

She's purple. She's a tricolor. But she shut out her purple at first, which is like she was editing herself. So she. She shut out her purple and she's like, hey guys, I'm going to Be yellow blue, you know, and let's have cupcake party. I always use that cupcake party at 9am or whatever. And then one day, like she's gonna handle anymore. Her purple was.

[Scotty]

The purple just took to go.

[Mystic Michaela]

I'm bomb this crap. Elizabeth, we're gonna. We're. We're done.

[Scotty]

The tornado game. The tricolor tornado came out.

[Mystic Michaela]

And let's give them something to talk about. Right. They're nice travel as well.

[Scotty]

Good job. Good job.

[Mystic Michaela]

Made me laugh really hard.

[Scotty]

All right, all right. I have Katie C. All right. I just finished venting about this. I am a pink blue. One particular friend group. I'm the only one with a girl while the other moms are boy moms.

[Mystic Michaela]

Okay.

[Scotty]

Oh, yeah. We even. We'd even talk about this. The difference between whether you have a girl or a boy. Yeah. Your. Your mom group was all girls.

[Mystic Michaela]

It was. Yeah.

[Scotty]

But let's say it's. It's mix or mostly boys or.

[Mystic Michaela]

Right.

[Scotty]

My baby is also the youngest. I'm the new mom.

[Mystic Michaela]

That's hard.

[Scotty]

Yeah, that's hard.

[Mystic Michaela]

That's hard to tell you what to do.

[Scotty]

Yep. Yeah. They love. They love to tell you what.

[Mystic Michaela]

They love it.

[Scotty]

They love to tell me. Yep, There we go. They love to tell me at. Harp on that. Boys are so much harder than girls. And girls just sit politely and behave while boys are climbing on tables and breaking things. It makes me feel inadequate and that I'm not a real mom. Come on, Katie. You are a real mom.

[Mystic Michaela]

Oh, my gosh.

[Scotty]

I'm not. I'm not a real mom because I have it so much easier with a girl. I think it's just hard to be a mom in general. And there's so much toxicity and competition rather than support all the competition. All right, well, first of all, yes, you are a real mom, Katie.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yes. Boys versus girl. I mean, it's all hard and every. It's all hard.

[Scotty]

Yeah.

[Mystic Michaela]

It's just. Yeah, it is a little different, but it's all hard. But it's interesting because I feel like pink blues. Those are the ones I always, like, worry about. They're like the little person in the mom group that everybody gives advice to and then can feel smart.

[Scotty]

Smart about it is blow up your mom group. Purple Bomb it. Do whatever it takes.

[Mystic Michaela]

Piss them off.

[Scotty]

Just destroy that group.

[Mystic Michaela]

Elizabeth. Revolution.

[Scotty]

Burn it to the ground. Burn your mouth group to the ground. That's our advice.

[Mystic Michaela]

All right. This is a great thread.

[Scotty]

Okay. Yes, we could.

[Mystic Michaela]

I feel like we all need a bottle of wine. That's my Kind of mom group. All right. Jennifer P. Says, my purple has craved the community. So I helped bring together other mamas in the area for coffee and park meetups with our kiddos. It became too much for my indigo. I did, however, meet a like minded mama at one of the gatherings. And eventually I stopped planning all the meetups and became close friends with her. Having a close circle of deep soul connected friends is best for me. I have a best friend from major stages of my life and they are still my best friends now. I found big mama gatherings and groups aren't for me with all the clashing opinions, different values, and girls who were likely mean girls in high school are still the mean girls. I did have a hard time with one of the mamas who really wanted to help. She wanted to plan three months out and make it way more complicated than what I was doing with my flexible planning. I'm pretty sure she was a yellow blue. Yeah. So she was a purple mom who started trying to plan all this stuff. And then of course a yellow came in and was like, hi, hey. You're not like doing it right? Let me help you. And then, you know, she was just like, forget it, I'm done. She like indigo stood with some other lady and she's happy now and that's great. So I think that that's like an Indigo story. An indigo happy mom story.

[Scotty]

All right. All right. I have Kim, Kim B. And she is confirmed. Purple blue to go.

[Mystic Michaela]

Okay.

[Scotty]

So she became a mother at 19 and her daughter's a wonderful. Grew into a wonderful person. Of course, throughout that time, I often felt judged by other mothers. I think their attitudes stem from a young age and the fact that I had my first child at 19. Yeah, that. That's hard too, right? When you're. Yeah.

[Mystic Michaela]

The judgment.

[Scotty]

The judgment. Yeah. Like, oh, only 19, blah, blah, blah. Which may have led them to see me as inexperienced and or judged. Many assume they knew my type.

[Mystic Michaela]

Ouch. The judginess.

[Scotty]

Yeah, I. I wore or still do it sometimes. Inauthentic red. Well, you have.

[Mystic Michaela]

You're going to wear gsd.

[Scotty]

Get that red going, Kim. Blow this mom group up. They never seem to want my help. Yeah. On any of the mom groups.

[Mystic Michaela]

That's terrible.

[Scotty]

Yeah. So I guess, you know, that's hard.

[Mystic Michaela]

When you're a young mom. You're a young mom plus purple. Young plus purple means they're going to judge you and then you automatically feel like you're in a lower class.

[Scotty]

Right.

[Mystic Michaela]

Or you're a bad influence or whatever. That's Just what you're going to pick up. Yeah, maybe. May I just say something? I read so many people, a lot of people have kids young, like teenagers. They do. It happens. Okay. And I will say on the whole, these moms are some of the best mothers I've ever read. They grow up with their kids and their kids end up. These are like, really vulnerable moms. Like, you have your kid that young, you know what happens is, is you're like, I don't know everything, and you're real honest about it with your kid, and your kid understands that. And I see like really lovely bonds between moms and their kids when they're young. So if that happened to you, and if you're a young mom, honestly, it's a really interesting relationship, but not a bad one. But. Yeah, that's. That's sick too. I know that feeling too, like to feel people judging or, you know, having an idea about you. And it's just so dirty feeling. Now.

[Scotty]

There were, There were a few positive ones, by the way.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah, we didn't read those.

[Scotty]

Yeah, we didn't read those. But there were just. There is a flip side. There are some positive moms I know.

[Mystic Michaela]

And some people. Some people were like, oh, I love my mom group. And then I was looking at some of the mom groups. So some people put pictures in and what I noticed was just kind of general. In the good mom groups, everyone's just down to earth. I got that kind of vibe and all different aura colors because it's not really the auras problem. It's morally intention problem.

[Scotty]

Yeah. Are there dad. I wasn't in one. Is there.

[Mystic Michaela]

Are there dad groups like dad talk?

[Scotty]

Is there dad, like, are there dads?

[Mystic Michaela]

Like, dad, Toxic dad. You know what I'm talking about? Dad talk? No, it's Secret Lives of Mormon Wives.

[Scotty]

Oh, the dads, dad. Oh, yeah, that's definitely toxic dad talk. I mean, I don't know. I mean, maybe single. Single dads would be more. I don't know.

[Mystic Michaela]

So there's always like.

[Scotty]

I mean, I wasn't in one. I didn't know.

[Mystic Michaela]

Sometimes there's always like that one dad in the mom group. You were joking about it, but. Yeah, that wasn't you. But sometimes there's always like a dad and he's in the mom group.

[Scotty]

I mean, we would hang out like, as family. So I knew the dads, like, you know, of the mom.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah.

[Scotty]

Of like the moms that were in the group. And then I'd hang out with the dads, but we just talk about football or something.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah, yeah.

[Scotty]

We don't really. We didn't usually talk about.

[Mystic Michaela]

It depends. Like, I think with the. If there's more stay at home dads. Yeah, there's gonna be more. There's gonna be more dad groups or dads infiltrating mom groups. Because you. It's really not about gender. It's about community. Like, you really do need help.

[Scotty]

You need it. Yeah. And that, that. And there lies the problem that you. You kind of need this. You need it because especially with the first one, you're so nervous and lack of confidence.

[Mystic Michaela]

Right.

[Scotty]

Inexperience.

[Mystic Michaela]

And also your mindset.

[Scotty]

And your mindset. Right.

[Mystic Michaela]

Yeah.

[Scotty]

And you're like, what is going on here? It is a shocking change.

[Mystic Michaela]

And you're scared all the time.

[Scotty]

Yeah. You don't. Like, this is for, I guess, people that have never had a kid. And here I go, dadsplaining. But, you know, I don't know if, like, anything prepares you for that moment when you bring that kid home, especially, and it's just yours.

[Mystic Michaela]

Like, I think you realize that you're like, wait, what?

[Scotty]

Yeah.

[Mystic Michaela]

I was like, yes, God, we had a kid.

[Scotty]

Thank God I had you, because I had no clue.

[Mystic Michaela]

No, we had what to do. We had each other.

[Scotty]

I would just be. You just be like, all right, we need this. I'm like, all right, I am going to. What was that? Not Toys R Us. I'm going to Babies R Us. I'm getting these three things.

[Mystic Michaela]

Is that crazy? Baby OSRS is gone.

[Scotty]

Yeah. And that was like my. I felt like that's how I contributed. Like, I will go to the store at midnight, a swing and get this. Swing at midnight.

[Mystic Michaela]

Right.

[Scotty]

And that's what I'm contribution. Got it, got it.

[Mystic Michaela]

Did it.

[Scotty]

All right.

[Mystic Michaela]

It's hard. It's hard, it's hard. And I think, hopefully this episode helps you understand that you have needs, too. You have spiritual, energetic needs, and it's important to pay attention to them when you join any group, especially a mom group, when you're so vulnerable in this transformation. But this podcast is for you and about you, and we're so glad you spent some time with us today. Hello, podcast fans. If you're looking for a new podcast, if you enjoy articles, books, pop culture, and hilarity, try listening to the Brain Candy Podcast. That's right, the Brain Candy. Brain Candy podcast has over 500 episodes of educational hilarity to satiate your learning needs. Just search for the Brain Candy podcast on your podcast app or click the link in the show notes.