Vacation Realizations & Digestive Situations

Summary

Laugh Lines with Kim & Penn Holderness

Episode: Vacation Realizations & Digestive Situations

Date: May 26, 2026

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Episode Overview

In this lively episode of Laugh Lines, Kim and Penn Holderness reflect on their recent vacation—a 50th birthday escape for Kim—unplugging from work, battling unexpected luggage drama, and sharing brutally honest (and hilarious) vacation lessons. The couple explore themes of aging, self-acceptance, bodily quirks, and the realities of rest, with their trademark wit and candidness. Listener voicemails spur deeper discussions about hearing loss, family memories tied to music, and travel hacks. The episode is a breezy, feel-good ride through relatable aging adventures, replete with signature banter and playful sidebars.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Vacation: The Highs, Luggage Lows, and Realizations

(03:30–10:22)

• The Vacation Setup:
  Kim's 50th birthday trip gets off to a rocky start with a last-minute flight cancellation and lost luggage for three days.

  • Kim: “It’s my 50th birthday and we’d saved our money. So I walked up to another airline’s counter and I was like, get me there.” (04:17)
  • They joke about hotel slippers, lack of underwear, and the surprising resilience (and dirt resistance) of complimentary bedroom footwear.

• Carry-On Only 'Cult':
  Their ordeal prompts a (sometimes tongue-in-cheek) conversion to the "carry-on only" lifestyle.

  • Kim: “People who pack carry-on only are in a cult.” (05:04)
  • Ben: “They look upon those who check their bags with a bit of disdain sometimes.” (05:48)
  • Kim: “I have to join the cult because I'll never check a bag again...they lost my bag on the way back.” (05:57)
  • Jokes about not letting Kim slip extra “just a couple things” into Penn’s bag spark a mock marital vow segment.
  • Kim: “Do not put any of my crap in your carry on bag.” (07:57)

• Packing Lessons:
  They realize how little they actually need and commit to carry-on life, with Kim investing in bigger personal items (“I did go on Dolly Parton's internet…” (09:20)).

2. The Two Kinds of Vacations

(10:22–14:14)

• Adventure vs. Rest:
  Penn notes, “There’s the vacation where you…seize the day…then there’s the vacation where you try to set a new record for the fewest steps.”
  • This trip, unplugged and agenda-free, contrasts with their usual action-packed getaways.
  • Kim: “I have trouble resting, and I felt very guilty resting.” (11:42)
  • Penn: “All those things were really good for my brain and body, just being able to do that…let time slow down.” (12:43)
• Rest Guilt & Generational Habits:
  Kim opens up about struggle with “vacation guilt” and productivity-related anxiety, tracing it back to her childhood environment.

3. Digestive Situations & Spa Adventures

(14:14–17:47)

• The Perils of the Vacation Massage:
  A candid (perhaps too candid) discussion about digestive issues derailing Penn’s massage.

  • Penn: “I just had a pretty runny BM...hadn’t used the word BM since the 80s.” (14:38)
  • Kim: “Keep in mind, he does not have new underwear, so we really needed to protect…” (15:22)
  • Discussions about massage etiquette (“Most people wear underwear during massages” (16:48)), farts, spa professionalism, and whether women would prefer men to keep underwear on.

• Practical Underwear Advice:
  Kim: “If you go somewhere warm, think about the amount of underwear that you will need and then triple it. Right. Because…you may crap your pants. And then you’re just, like, a little swampy.” (17:28–17:44)

4. Travel Class Observations: First Class vs. Coach

(17:49–20:56)

• Penn: “People in first class in general, on average, are grumpier than people in coach.” (18:23)
  • Observations about seating etiquette, seat reclining complaints, and general airplane behavior spark musings on privilege and politeness.

5. Musical Time Capsules: Childhood Trigger Songs

(22:14–28:25)

• Dinner Nostalgia and Song Memories:
  Kim and Penn recount a vacation dinner full of 1980s classics, leading into nostalgic recollections of music’s link to family routines:
  • Kim: “POV. It’s 1984. Your dad is sick of you sleeping on a Saturday morning and at 8:37 he drops the needle on a Chuck Mangione record. That’s your cue. Wake up and scrub some baseboards.” (22:14)
  • For Penn, “The Alan Parsons Project” is inextricably linked to orthodontist appointments.
  • Consideration of how childhood “busy” routines shape adult difficulty with rest.

6. Listener Laugh Line: Hearing Loss & Dementia Prevention

(28:34–36:23)

• Listener Empathy & Hearing Aids:
  Voicemails from Summer and Adam spur a discussion about age, hearing loss, and the stigma (or practical benefits) of hearing aids.

  • Summer: “It’s actually a secret weapon because when your hearing aids stream your phone...nobody around you knows...” (30:10)
  • Penn: “If I had a hearing aid that played me all my text messages...do you know how much less engaged I would be with the people around me?” (31:00)

• The Spousal Communication Debate:
  Adam (listener) supports Penn’s claim that sometimes the problem isn’t hearing loss but partners talking while walking away. Kim concedes: “I start a thought mid-sentence and I’m walking away. I know that.” (33:36)

• Audiologist Challenge:
  Kim proposes attending Penn’s next audiologist appointment to get closure, leading to jokes about accompanying each other to awkward health checkups. The couple banter about gynecology and colonoscopies, keeping things very real.

7. CDs, Nostalgia, and Lesbians Love Subarus

(40:29–45:18)

• Listener CD Case Hack:
  Kristen from Michigan calls in with a “CD jewel case” sticker removal hack. The crew demonstrates (and inadvertently breaks a CD case).

  • Ben: “That is wild...a pro tip I learned 20 years too late.” (42:45)
  • Discussion over the gradual extinction of car CD players, including the tidbit that the 2026 Subaru WRX was the final holdout (43:37).

• Subaru Stereotypes:
  Sam jokes about the Subaru–lesbian–CD connection:

  • Kim: “We got to play our Indigo Girls, come on. I have. I still have all my Indigo Girl CDs.” (43:53)

• Mixtape Longing:
  Lamenting the lost art of gifting physical mixtapes.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Packing Vows:
  • Kim: “Do not put any of my crap in your carry on bag. For better or worse…” (07:57)
• On Rest Guilt:
  • Kim: “I have trouble resting, and I felt very guilty resting.” (11:42)
• On Airplane Seating:
  • Ben: “People in first class in general, on average, are grumpier than people in coach.” (18:23)
• On Massage Mishaps:
  • Penn: “I just had a pretty runny BM… hadn’t used the word BM since the 80s.” (14:38)
• On Childhood Music Memories:
  • Kim: “POV. It’s 1984…he drops the needle on a Chuck Mangione record. That’s your cue. Wake up and scrub some baseboards.” (22:37)
  • Penn: “Do you guys know the Alan Parsons Project?...they played this song when we were at vacation, and I was like, oh my God. I'm back in a dentist's office.” (26:31)
• On Listeners Knowing the Laugh Line Number:
  • Kim: “A dude specifically knowing the laugh lines number, just straight to the heart. 10 out of 10.” (49:49)

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Important Timestamps

| Timestamp | Segment | |-----------|-------------------------------------------------------------------| | 03:30 | Vacation setup, flight, and luggage troubles | | 05:04 | Carry-on only “cult” discussion; mock travel vows | | 10:22 | “Two types of vacations” - unplugging vs. activity-filled | | 11:42 | Kim’s “vacation guilt” and reflection on difficulty resting | | 14:14 | Spa-and-digestive disaster: why Penn skipped his massage | | 17:28 | Underwear packing rules for travel | | 18:23 | Grumpiness in first class vs. coach debate | | 22:14 | 80s music nostalgia & family cleaning routines | | 28:34 | Listener advice: hearing loss, dementia, and partner communication| | 40:29 | CD nostalgia, last cars with CD players, lesbian Subaru stereotype| | 45:18 | Lamenting the mixtape | | 46:27 | Top Three Takeaways | | 49:49 | Listener’s mastery of the laugh line number |

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Highlight: Top Three Takeaways

(46:27–48:23)

• 1. Vacation guilt is real:
  • Often makes it difficult to fully enjoy rest—Kim’s struggle and Penn’s encouragement.
• 2. Most people wear underwear during massages:
  • After much debate, this is the consensus.
• 3. Lesbians like CDs (?!):
  • According to Subaru trivia and staff anecdotes—with playful protestations about stereotypes.

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Listener Engagement

• Listeners are encouraged to call or write in with stories about music memories, travel hacks, and all things aging (323-364-3929 / [e-mail]).
• The couple celebrates their supportive, participatory community, especially those who share personal stories and feedback about aging and health.

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Final Thoughts

“Vacation Realizations & Digestive Situations” is a quintessential Holderness episode: fast-paced, hilarious, sometimes cringingly honest, and always welcoming feedback from the “Laugh Liners.” It delivers lighthearted but thoughtful takes on the messiness and joys of aging, the humor found in bodily disasters, and the bonds of nostalgia and shared experience.

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Summary by [Podcast Summarizer AI, 2024]
For anyone who has ever overpacked, under-rested, or silently judged a fellow passenger’s reclining seat—this episode is your home.

Transcript

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[Ben Holderness]

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[Kim Holderness]

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[Ben Holderness]

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[Kim Holderness]

little pee came out.

[Ben Holderness]

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[Kim Holderness]

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[Ben Holderness]

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[Kim Holderness]

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[Ben Holderness]

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[Kim Holderness]

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[Ben Holderness]

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[Kim Holderness]

So I walked up to another airlines counter and I was like, get me there.

[Ben Holderness]

Every time we do this, you're like, I just need to put a couple of things in there.

[Kim Holderness]

I, Kim Holderness, do solemnly swear. Do solemnly swear.

[Ben Holderness]

Do not put any of my crap in your carry on bag.

[Kim Holderness]

Do not put any of my crap

[Ben Holderness]

in your carrying on book a massage if you can. It's great for you. But if you think you might. Your pants don't go. Yeah, we get older every day. Got more wrinkles.

[Kim Holderness]

That's okay.

[Ben Holderness]

Yeah, we're laughing. When we age, life is like a comedy stage. And that's why we got laugh lines.

[Kim Holderness]

Hi friends, I'm Kim Holderness.

[Ben Holderness]

And I'm Ben Holderness. And welcome to Laugh Lines Lifelines. Sorry. Here, let's go. Just a little bit more salty. And I'm Penn Olenus. Welcome to Lifelines.

[Caller or Guest (Summer or Kristen)]

Better.

[Kim Holderness]

Yes. If you go on vacation and proudly do not get a tan because you're sitting under an umbrella wearing a long sleeve, one piece bathing suit. Covered yourself in zinc sunscreen. You're home. I actually have a picture of myself. We recently went on vacation. I was under the umbrella with a hat, mineral sunscreen, and a long sleeve, one piece bathing suit.

[Ben Holderness]

And somehow we're both still peeling. I know. Like, it's just impossible. The sun always wins.

[Kim Holderness]

The sun Always wins. But listen, I pay too much money in Botox to really mess with this,

[Ben Holderness]

so I mess up Botox.

[Kim Holderness]

Well, you're, You're. It's. It's sun damage and that, like what it does to your skin. And then I. If I'm going to pay money to have tox it up, tox it up

[Ben Holderness]

to put botulism botch piece in your

[Kim Holderness]

forehead, I don't want it to, like, you know, I want to give it a fighting chance.

[Ben Holderness]

I gotcha.

[Kim Holderness]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Ben Holderness]

Well, yeah, I looked like a. I look like a white walker for most of the trip that we're going to talk about right now.

[Kim Holderness]

So, yeah, we have a fun show, I hope, for you today, some learnings from said vacay and yeah, yeah, we're just gonna have some fun today.

[Ben Holderness]

We don't normally talk our vacations, but this one was unique, I think, in a lot of ways. And I feel like we learned, like, a little bit more about ourselves and also just about vacations in general. After truly unplugging for a week, this

[Kim Holderness]

was my 50th birthday present. I didn't want a big party. I just wanted a trip. You and I, we get to the airport to depart for said vacation, and 15 minutes before we're just aboard our first flight, the airline cancels.

[Guest or Narrator (Leon Neyfak)]

They sure did.

[Kim Holderness]

They sure did.

[Ben Holderness]

Yeah.

[Kim Holderness]

And they're like, don't worry, we can get you there tomorrow. And if you read the, like, the kind of bill of rights, they are not responsible for paying for any money you would lose on that trip. And so we were losing a lot

[Ben Holderness]

of money every day.

[Kim Holderness]

That would be. Yeah, I mean, it's my 50th birthday and we'd saved our money. So I walked up to another airlines counter and I was like, get me there. But we knew that we would not have luggage. Like, there was like a zero percent chance our luggage would make. Make it. So, yeah, so we. We did not have luggage for the first several days of the trip.

[Ben Holderness]

Third day. Third day we got some luggage, which is. Okay, great segue, because what we're going to talk about today are our vacation realizations. That rhymes. So I feel like there should be a big, like a moving graphic for that one. Vacation realizations. And then like a sound effect. So vacation realization number one for us. While we're talking about packing things, people

[Kim Holderness]

who pack Carry on only are in a cult because I put on Instagram stories like, this is not a real

[Ben Holderness]

problem, but our checked bags got lost.

[Kim Holderness]

Our checked bags got lost on the way down for three days I put in. I just was posting a funny thing because Penn had to wear, like, the bedroom slippers they gave you at the hotel. He had to wear those around the resort because they obviously don't have a size 13.

[Ben Holderness]

Yeah, they got kind of dirty. But you know what they're gonna do.

[Kim Holderness]

I was very quick to say, these are not real problems. Just ha, ha, funny, funny. The amount of messages I got from people who big Carry on, the Big Carry on cult. These people are very proud that they only exclusively pack in carry ons. And they've got.

[Ben Holderness]

They've got their little shrink bag. They've got their little. And they've. And they look upon those who check their bags with a bit of disdain. Sometimes.

[Kim Holderness]

It was. I. Well, first of all, I have to join the cult because I'll never check a bag again because also, they lost my bag on the way back.

[Ben Holderness]

We had our bags for a very small percentage of the trip.

[Kim Holderness]

Well, and so we learned that actually, you know, we didn't need as much stuff as we packed. So lessons learned. Check. You know how people, like, if you know somebody who does CrossFit, you know

[Ben Holderness]

how, you know, they'll tell you.

[Kim Holderness]

They'll tell you. And so you know how people carry on only. They'll tell you that these people are so proud that they only packed in a. Oh, here comes.

[Ben Holderness]

Like you asked.

[Guest or Contributor (Sam or similar)]

Carry on only, baby.

[Ben Holderness]

All right, so listen. Good, Good. Sam's carry on only because I want to bring her in on this because I'm fine joining the cult and being that person at a party who's like, oh, yeah, Hawaii was great. Of course we checked Carry on because. Or didn't check. We didn't carry on because we have a system that we use. It's like, we're gonna be those people. We're joining the cult. I need to make. We've got some ground rules on this. Are you ready? There will be no shopping because shopping adds.

[Kim Holderness]

Yeah.

[Ben Holderness]

Heft to adds heft. So if there's carry on, we have to. Because vacation shopping has to be none of that. Rule number two, and this is a big one. If you just need a little extra space to throw. Like, can I just throw a couple things? A couple things in your bag, honey? Like, I. If I'm doing this with you, like, I'll be. I'm twice your size already. And so every time we do this, you're like, I just need to put a couple of things in there. And it's like, it's. It's a travel. She Puts like her makeup bag, which is the size of an entire suitcase in my suitcase. I'm like, I don't have any room.

[Caller or Listener (Adam)]

You're fine.

[Kim Holderness]

You're right.

[Ben Holderness]

So this has to be. We have to. This is my dance space. This is your dance space. Are you in front of God and these witnesses willing to commit to this? Because I think we could make it work.

[Kim Holderness]

Are we taking our vows?

[Ben Holderness]

Yes, we are. I'm gonna just because, like, you know, people can wear sneakers everywhere. I'm just gonna bring one pair of sneakers and we'll be able to pull this.

[Kim Holderness]

I vouch you on this.

[Ben Holderness]

State your name. Yeah.

[Kim Holderness]

I, Kim Holderness.

[Ben Holderness]

Do solemnly swear.

[Kim Holderness]

Do solemnly swear.

[Ben Holderness]

Do not put any of my crap in your carry on bag. For better or worse.

[Kim Holderness]

For better words.

[Ben Holderness]

In sickness and in health.

[Kim Holderness]

Sickness and in health.

[Ben Holderness]

In medicine kit and in shoes. Go ahead. As long as we both shall live.

[Kim Holderness]

As long as we both shall travel.

[Ben Holderness]

We're now married. Yeah.

[Kim Holderness]

So can I admit something, Ben? So first of all, we went on.

[Ben Holderness]

Are you already breaking our vows?

[Kim Holderness]

No, no, no. Yeah, I was. So we got back Saturday evening before Mother's Day. They lost our bag. My bag. They couldn't find. It was the drama. So I stayed at the Delta Airlines luggage counter until 2am after we landed. Cause I was like, we need. And it was like this cute little Gen Z girl who came out of nowhere and was like, clickety clack, she found my bag. At that moment, I'm like, I can't do this because this has wasted hours and hours of our trip on the phone because we switched airlines. And then whose fault is it like it. So we. We wasted so much time. So we did spend. We saved money for this trip, but then we had to spend a lot of money for this. So this trip was not like it was a honeymoon level type trip. So Penn and I are not going to spend money. Like we can't spend money this. We're like, we're not spending money this summer. But I did go on Dolly Parton's Internet and I searched out like the biggest care like personal item backpack. So that is coming.

[Ben Holderness]

Is that the thing that's in our.

[Kim Holderness]

No, that's a different carry on bag.

[Ben Holderness]

Oh, so there's another bag that you.

[Kim Holderness]

Yeah, I just feel like if I'm going to commit to the carry on life, I need to have my carry on tools. So I did buy bigger carry on

[Ben Holderness]

allotted and they're still going to be. They are allowed to care because they now. The TSA now has like a Dude who's, like, checking when you're walking through

[Kim Holderness]

the line, like, yeah.

[Ben Holderness]

Did you compress that thing? Because if not.

[Kim Holderness]

Yeah, no.

[Caller or Guest (Summer or Kristen)]

No.

[Kim Holderness]

I'm gonna. I'm gonna have to send you. But I'm spending money to save money on our layover. We did layover in Charlotte, and I knew my bag wasn't gonna make it, so I went to the Spanx store in Charlotte to buy underwear for myself. I just knew I'm like, all I need is, like, underwear. I'll buy a bathing suit when I get there. They did not. In the Charlotte airport that I saw where the terminal we. Where we were, they had no men's underwear. So I was like, okay, boo.

[Ben Holderness]

And then I bought it, and I bought a bathing suit and just walked around with that for three days. Same day. Everyone's like, oh, yeah, I know.

[Kim Holderness]

There's Pen.

[Ben Holderness]

There's the guy in the blue bathing suit.

[Kim Holderness]

Yeah. So we are. We're carrying.

[Ben Holderness]

So I've got some other, like, vacation realizations. Would you like to hear some of them?

[Kim Holderness]

Yeah.

[Ben Holderness]

Okay. There's two types of vacations.

[Kim Holderness]

Okay.

[Ben Holderness]

There's the one that we normally take, which is full of new adventures and finding new things and, like, going for big hikes, working out, getting a lot of exercise, like, really kind of seizing the day and making the most out of whatever situation that you're in. Then there's the vacation where you try to set a new record for the fewest steps on your Apple watch in one day.

[Kim Holderness]

Yeah, that's what we did.

[Ben Holderness]

We've never done that before.

[Kim Holderness]

Never.

[Ben Holderness]

Right. And for that reason, sometimes we would get back from our vacation and be like, huh. Well, that. That felt a little bit like most of the other things that we do, but, like, the true unplugging and, like, we are not gonna do much. How did you like that, and how did you respond to that?

[Kim Holderness]

I. It was hard for me.

[Ben Holderness]

That's not normally something that you want to do.

[Kim Holderness]

And we had a lot of discussion about this because there wasn't much, like, on purpose. There wasn't much to do. So, like, it. There wasn't a hike to take. There wasn't, like, you could sit there, you could swim, and then you can sit there again. So there's just. What? There weren't a lot of options. There was a gym, but that's just sad. Like, I'm just not gonna go to a gym.

[Ben Holderness]

It was a nice gym, I would think.

[Kim Holderness]

Yeah. I was like, this is depressing me.

[Ben Holderness]

Yeah.

[Kim Holderness]

So I feel like it is programmed in and I don't know if this is a generational thing, and this is a very personal thing. I have trouble resting, and I felt very guilty resting.

[Ben Holderness]

Yeah, let's unpack that. Because you've talked about this before, like, the guilt part of it.

[Kim Holderness]

And I had to really. Like, we spent so much time talking about this. Like, why do I feel like I have to be productive on a trip that's meant to celebrate, you know, 50 years. Yeah. Of my life and the accomplishments and all of, like, just celebrate getting to 50.

[Ben Holderness]

And all the work that you've done, too. Like, that's. That's a big part of it, too, because we work most days, period, even weekends, doing something.

[Kim Holderness]

Doing something. But I struggled with it. But it was funny. By the time the day we were set to leave, then I was like, I'm ready to. I'm just ready to stay and unplug now, sir, please. I was. Yeah, I was like, passing me a Greyhound on the way out.

[Ben Holderness]

So I have less trouble than you doing this. But I think just because of our lives, I've done less of this. So just that real. Kind of like, just be a vegetable and let time slow down and let yourself be bored. I think all those things were really good for my brain and body, like, just being able to do that. Like, we would sit and not talk. It was great for incredible stretches of time, which is generally not my comfort zone.

[Kim Holderness]

Yeah. On the way down, he's like, babe, I've been practicing not talking. How do you do that?

[Ben Holderness]

I did. I have been.

[Kim Holderness]

He's like, I've been practicing not talking.

[Ben Holderness]

Yeah.

[Kim Holderness]

Yeah. You did such a good job not talking. No, there was even. He came out. He's like, a lot of energy in the morning. And I was just sitting in my chair because that's all you could do. And I was like, babe, you're at, like, a seven. I'm gonna need you at a three. Just, like, bring it down. Just.

[Ben Holderness]

It was your week.

[Kim Holderness]

It was my week.

[Ben Holderness]

Now I'm back to being loud. Okay, here's a realization about a vacation. Book a massage if you can. It's great for you, but if you think you might. Your pants don't go. So we both had a spa appointment, so I'm like, filling out the parts of my body. I was like, hey, do you guys have a bathroom? And they were like, sure, yeah, we have. It's right over there. Like, I'm like, yeah. So it's probably a good idea to just make sure that. That everything is. You know, because you get really relaxed when you have a massage, right? And so. And so I went in. Wait, do you want to read?

[Kim Holderness]

I got to. I had my little treatment. I went back. I'm like, I just have to take a nap now. That was amazing. And he texted me. So, like, five O's. I'm in the bathroom over here. Just got hit with some digestive distress. Lol. I may skip this and head home. So you didn't go?

[Ben Holderness]

I did. And I was. Because everyone is very, like, calm and polite there. And so I walked in.

[Kim Holderness]

I'm like, hey, hey, I'm Asha.

[Ben Holderness]

I tried to match their energy. I'm like. So I just had a pretty runny bm. And it's something like that. Like. And I hadn't used the word BM since, like, the 80s. Like, but it just felt like the right time to do it.

[Kim Holderness]

And they're like, you're good, because they would normally charge you if you don't cancel within.

[Ben Holderness]

Like, they're like, we'll reschedule. It's totally kind of like, thank you so much. I just don't know what the next hour is gonna look like for me. And so, sure enough, they didn't charge us. They didn't charge us. Went back to the hotel room. And it's a good thing. Yeah, it was a good thing. It was like, you go to an island, you drink the new water or whatever, this happens. And so. But, like, I was just imagining.

[Kim Holderness]

Keep in mind, he does not have new underwear, so we really needed to protect.

[Ben Holderness]

And proper massage, though. Is white towel. No clothes.

[Kim Holderness]

You don't wear underwear?

[Ben Holderness]

No. They tell you to take it off.

[Kim Holderness]

You know, they say. They say, undress to the point of comfort. And I comfortable wearing underwear. I mean, I. I would love people to chime in here.

[Ben Holderness]

You also have less. You have less stuff. Stuff in your. Like, if I was wearing a women's underwear, I probably wouldn't need that because. But they had to get into the, like, you know, where are they touching you? No, nowhere. In the. In the. In the mommy, daddy area.

[Guest or Contributor (Sam or similar)]

Let's never use that phrase again.

[Ben Holderness]

Sorry. What should I call it on a.

[Kim Holderness]

Your special purpose.

[Ben Holderness]

Yeah, nothing happened to my special purpose.

[Kim Holderness]

Yeah, there is.

[Ben Holderness]

There is, like, a fear of something happening to your special purpose also during.

[Kim Holderness]

Which is why you wear underwear.

[Ben Holderness]

Yeah, but, I mean, it's covered by a towel, but sometimes it's a loose towel anyway. That's what I'm saying.

[Kim Holderness]

If I'm a woman, I would want the men on my table to be wearing underwear.

[Ben Holderness]

She Told me specifically to take off all of my clothing, including my underwear. And it wasn't like, one of those places.

[Kim Holderness]

No, obviously.

[Ben Holderness]

And there was. Yeah, it was all very professional. But, I mean, again, why are we worried about any of this? I was worried I was gonna crap my pants. That was the base. Like, that's the main part of this story.

[Kim Holderness]

Yeah, she. She wanted nothing to do with your ass.

[Ben Holderness]

Like, oh, wow. She got a really good part of my. Like, that would immediately. Because that happens sometimes. Anyway. You did definitely fart. Well, you fart when you're getting massages.

[Kim Holderness]

I don't know that I do.

[Ben Holderness]

Why is everybody looking at me like this?

[Kim Holderness]

I don't. I don't know if, you know, you

[Ben Holderness]

can sneak out at sbd, but, like, it's silent but deadly. Like, there's all these, like. There's all of these, like, muscles that are getting released that aren't tightened up. Yeah.

[Kim Holderness]

It's the human body.

[Ben Holderness]

It's never like, I never make a big, loud parting noise, but, you know, you're there for 90 minutes anyway.

[Kim Holderness]

Yeah.

[Ben Holderness]

Would you like another vacation realization?

[Kim Holderness]

Sure.

[Ben Holderness]

You taught me this. If you go somewhere warm, think about the amount of underwear that you will need and then triple it.

[Kim Holderness]

Right. Because, A, you may. You may crap your pants.

[Ben Holderness]

Yep.

[Kim Holderness]

You may crop your pants. A. And then you're just, like, a little swampy. Right. So just bring a lot.

[Ben Holderness]

Yeah.

[Kim Holderness]

So that may. That may take up a big part of my carry on.

[Ben Holderness]

Yeah.

[Kim Holderness]

It's just underwear.

[Ben Holderness]

And your underwear is so, so tiny when you put it in there, like, you could pack literally a thousand and you could probably still fit it in there. So this one is something I realized. So we had. We traveled a lot last year because of this book that we put out, this book tour, and a couple, like, other things, like work trips, and we got so many miles status so that we got moved up to first class for one part of our trip, and then we were in regular. We were in coach for the other part of the trip. So this may be a hot take. People in first class in general, on average, are grumpier than people in coach.

[Commercial Announcer]

Yeah.

[Kim Holderness]

I think because we had seen. We experienced, like, we were, like, middle seats. And then we got the next. The very next experience.

[Ben Holderness]

We're like, everyone in coach was just thrilled to be there and, like, so excited, so embarrassed.

[Kim Holderness]

Like, like, if we get. And we. We do. We have this, like, airline status, and they. They had just lost our luggage.

[Ben Holderness]

Yeah.

[Kim Holderness]

So I was like, I. We're going to take it. I'm Going to take that upgrade because they just lost our luggage and he was in mealy underwear. But I don't. I think I just put my headphones on and, and head down, so I didn't. I don't know what you speak of. I just a lot of like, excuse me.

[Ben Holderness]

Excuse me. I have not gotten my vodka soda yet. Like, and I've been sitting here for four seconds, like. And the person is, like, trying to move around. Like, they'll. They'll ask. They'll. They'll take their laptops out, and they're like, sir, sorry, we haven't taken off yet. They're like, I know when the doors close, I'm going to do. You know, they just sort of feel like the rules don't, like, the general travel rules don't apply to them. A lot more reclining in first class than in, like, I feel like in coach a lot of times people are just generally polite and are like, I don't want to crunch the person.

[Kim Holderness]

So that's. That's the question. Is that so I used to like, oh, if it's my airline seat. And I think this is when airlines had more space. Yeah, I did used to recline, but now there's no space. So I'm like, you can't recline anymore. But I think this is a debate online because people are like, no, it's your seat. You paid for your seat. And if it. If it has the ability to recline, you should be allowed to do that. But at this point, you recline and like, yeah, the other seats right here,

[Ben Holderness]

if someone reclines on me, I wait for that to happen.

[Kim Holderness]

Penn was sending me because we were different parts of the plane, too. He was sending me the. The pictures of his. The person in front of him had reclined and like, his knees and the.

[Ben Holderness]

Oh, yeah.

[Kim Holderness]

Anyway, anyway, I. I think that's. That's up for debate. I don't know if I have a real. I'm. I'm pretty neutral on this.

[Ben Holderness]

Okay.

[Kim Holderness]

Like, I could go, it's not the hill I'm gonna die on. It's like, you should be allowed to recline your seat, but don't be about it.

[Ben Holderness]

Oh, the reclining thing. Yeah, yeah. I just, like, in my height, if we're in coach and someone reclines, I have to basically just, like, slip myself under. And it's. And it gets to the point where a couple of times, like, people have touched my feet, like, on the road front, they're like, oh, sorry, sir. I'm like, I'm sorry, I shouldn't even be there. But like, look at me.

[Caller or Guest (Summer or Kristen)]

Yeah.

[Ben Holderness]

And a lot of times they're like, you're fine. Like I'll have. I, I generally have communications with the people in front of me.

[Kim Holderness]

Yeah.

[Ben Holderness]

If they're reclining, I'm like, you're fine. Reclining. I need to turn into like I need my legs to. Basically I need to be playing footsie with you for most of the trip.

[Kim Holderness]

I would say we, we also had another fun experience, probably the, the most memorable part of our trip for me. More on this after these words.

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[Kim Holderness]

Alright.

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[Kim Holderness]

So we were at a dinner one night and they, they definitely googled like songs white people listen to in the 80s because we were all singing along at our table. It was great. We had so much fun. But it was, it was, it was so nostalgic because they were playing songs and Penn looked at me and he's like, how do you know all the words to these songs? It hit me that this, this is, was the like point of view. Okay? POV. It's 1984. Your dad is sick of you sleeping on a Saturday morning and it's 8:37 and he drops the needle on a Chuck Manjone record. That is your cue. Wake up and scrub some baseboards. Do you know Chuck Manjone?

[Ben Holderness]

So I, I was having a tough time with it until it got like the, the, there's the lead in. But go ahead and play it.

[Kim Holderness]

Here we go, here we go. Here we go. It's 8:37. It's time to wake up. Guys. It's a sheet. Stay. Pull all those sheets off. Guys.

[Ben Holderness]

Those baseboards aren't going to wash themselves.

[Kim Holderness]

Hold on. We're about ready to put some comet in the bathtub. Let it sit, let it sit. Ready?

[Ben Holderness]

She's still waiting for the hook. Here it comes.

[Caller or Guest (Summer or Kristen)]

Nope, nope.

[Ben Holderness]

How long is this leading?

[Wayfair Announcer]

Ready?

[Kim Holderness]

Okay guys, take those toothbrushes, get on the floor. Time to scrub. That grout's really gross. Not anymore. Ready? I mean, just a bob. And this is.

[Ben Holderness]

There's no words to this.

[Kim Holderness]

There's no words but like it's just clean your. This is. Clean your ass up. Ready? This is my childhood right here. Like every, every Saturday morning the needle would drop and it's like there was no maybe this is why I can't relax on vacation. And like.

[Ben Holderness]

Because you're thinking about.

[Kim Holderness]

Well no, it's. There is no, it's, it's 8:30. You have to get up.

[Ben Holderness]

Yeah.

[Kim Holderness]

This is the day we clean everything.

[Ben Holderness]

Right.

[Kim Holderness]

And there are, you know, and there's a skit. You're a busy family. Like they both. My parents both worked crazy full time jobs. So by Saturday the house needed some.

[Ben Holderness]

Yeah.

[Kim Holderness]

And there was no like house cleaners that came in every two weeks or anything like that. So we were. There was a schedule and there was grout to be cleaned. And I'm sorry, The grout in 1884 was not sealed the way it is today because it was gross. So yeah, that was my childhood.

[Ben Holderness]

Yours was, yours was cleaning on a Saturday morning and, and those songs take you back to that.

[Kim Holderness]

Right?

[Ben Holderness]

So I have. It's. It was so funny when you said that because I think I remember saying, okay, this song because another song came up. Similar era, but for me, just because of how British my teeth are. I spent most of my childhood in an orthodontist's or dentist's office being like restructured.

[Kim Holderness]

Oh wait, wait, wait, wait. How long did you have braces?

[Ben Holderness]

Six years. I had braces for six years.

[Kim Holderness]

I didn't know they could do that.

[Ben Holderness]

Yeah. Oh yeah. I was like, I was in all the records, I'm in all the medical journals. And also my orthodontist was like, I would, I would always be like an usher or somebody at church. And he went to our church and he would always check for my friggin rubber bands when I was walking. And I sometimes had him in. Somebody would always be like, and you have your rubber bands?

[Kim Holderness]

Well, that's why you were in orthodontia for six years. You don't wear your rubber bands.

[Ben Holderness]

Yes and no. I was a buck tooth yokel for a long time. Yeah. But so. But when I went to Dr. Deal's office, he played this. The same 12 songs came on the entire time I was there. And so, like, they played this song when we were at vacation, and I was like, oh, my God. I'm back in a dentist's office. Do you guys know the Alan Parsons Project?

[Kim Holderness]

Yeah.

[Ben Holderness]

No. Anyone? You guys remember this one? Yeah. And now a little bit of suction. And now spit. Okay, Pen. Pen is ready, but we're just gonna need to tighten up this back. And he's humming Dr. Deal just. Huh. Man. It's like, ah. That was my.

[Kim Holderness]

So I could smell. Like, when I hear Chuck Manjone, I smell like the comet cleaning powder. And you smell like teeth.

[Ben Holderness]

I literally just started salivating while I was listening to it. It's like the reaction to my mouth, like, protect yourself. Parsons Project.

[Kim Holderness]

So I would love to hear from our laughliners. What are the songs? Like, what is the. Like, your mom, your dad? My dad. My dad was the one who woke us up. Like, what. They woke you up on Saturday morning to clean? To, like, what was your playlist? And then what was your. Like, what are the songs that bring you back to those. Like, the dentist office. I mean, that was pretty great.

[Ben Holderness]

Or just any, like, anything. Any part of your childhood where a song was, like, intimately attached to something that. Yeah, usually it's traumatic cleaning or getting.

[Kim Holderness]

I mean, and. And it was. I mean, God bless my dad. Like, we didn't have Spotify back then, and we, you know, we weren't spending money on, like, trying to be current in music. So.

[Ben Holderness]

Yeah.

[Kim Holderness]

Okay. While we were out, we got some great voicemails and emails, and we love to listen to them on the Laugh Line. So shall we head to the laugh

[Ben Holderness]

part of the show where everyone will find

[Kim Holderness]

you?

[Ben Holderness]

Tell us what's on your mind.

[Kim Holderness]

We have talked a lot about dementia and Alzheimer's prevention, and there are. There are a lot of studies. I can't quote them now because I didn't look up. Look them up. But there is new evidence to suggest that those that struggle with their hearing. It's like your brain is working so hard to hear that it's sort of something happens. And you're more likely to be diagnosed with dementia if you have poor hearing. I do believe you need to get your ears checked.

[Ben Holderness]

Yes, we. We talked about that. And you did. The ladies who wants him to get his hearing checked? Like, in One of our last podcasts,

[Kim Holderness]

and of course we heard a lot

[Ben Holderness]

from a lot of you, but thank you because there were some people on my team for this whole thing because I did get my hearing checked, but I went to an ENT to get my hearing checked and they said I have one specific part of whatever the wavelength is that's a little muted. And they think it's always happens when you played in the band. But that, like, that probably isn't as much of an issue as the fact that like, my executive functioning is broken down and when there's a lot of other noise, it's hard for me to like, weed it out.

[Kim Holderness]

Which is totally fair. Yeah, that's totally fair. But you have an odd. You had somebody who said like, yeah, there's a frequency you can't hear. So to me I'm like, go get some hearing aids. I mean, I feel like they even have like iPhone apps right now that you could use as hearing aids and if you only even wear them, like half the time. Anyway, we got a lot of feedback, so this call is from Summer.

[Caller or Guest (Summer or Kristen)]

Hello, this is Summer. I'm from Columbus, Ohio, and I'm calling specifically for Penn today. Penny. I had to get my hearing tested and I got hearing aids fairly young. I was still in my 50s, early 50s, I think. When I got my hearing aids, I was very embarrassed and I thought everybody could see them. And it was a horrifying thing. But let me tell you, it's actually a secret weapon because when your hearing aids stream your phone, your text messages, then somebody texts you and it's read to you in your ear and nobody around you know that you can hear that.

[Kim Holderness]

I put in AirPods at the grocery store so people know I'm not listening to them.

[Ben Holderness]

But first of all, Summer, thank you. Thank you everyone for being like, I think all of these are coming from being concerned for my well being. And I love you guys for feeling that way about me. And it's. It warms my heart. Like we've gotten so many messages as we've gone on this Alzheimer's journey. Like, hey, you got this. You know, we all want you to be around a lot longer. I feel like I've gained like thousands of family members and it is very touching. Summer, if I had a hearing aid that played me all my text messages and played whatever I wanted to at any point in time, do you know how much less engaged I would be with the people around me with just with my particular. The problem is I've got ADHD too. I would Be. I would be gone. So I would need to get the. I would need to get the hearing aid from, like, the 1970s. It doesn't have any of these.

[Kim Holderness]

No Wi Fi.

[Ben Holderness]

Any of this. WI Fi. Having said that, I don't think I'd be embarrassed to have a hearing aid. Like, I. I've admitted some pretty embarrassing stuff on this show, so.

[Kim Holderness]

And one of our besties, Alex Lacamore, proudly has hearing. Like, he wears hearing.

[Ben Holderness]

Yeah. And his. Like, yeah. So I. I actually have talked to him about it, and I'm like, I'm down. I just. No doctor has told me that I need hearing aids yet. I've been to a doctor and, like, really? What. I've. And I'm glad we've got another one of these, because the. The issue for some people love you is that sometimes you have a partner who, when they communicate, they do it in motion while either walking away from you or not even being in the same room as you. And so sometimes I have to say, honey, I didn't hear that. And it may sound to you like I have a hearing problem, but maybe it's something else. So. Adam.

[Caller or Listener (Adam)]

Hi, Penn. This is Adam from Sugarrin Falls, Ohio. And I just wanted to say that I am 100% on your side. I was just listening to your podcast, and I had the exact same hearing test experience is. My wife was telling me that I couldn't hear her. I went into the audiologist and said that I had perfect hearing. And she just sometimes talk very quietly or wander away or wonder why I can't hear her when the dishwasher is running and the sink and the oven. So, no, it is not necessarily you. It easily could be Kim, and it's very hard for her to understand. Sometimes facing away from folks makes them harder to hear, Adam.

[Ben Holderness]

So remember how we start with thank you for caring.

[Kim Holderness]

Thank you.

[Ben Holderness]

It's not going to work.

[Kim Holderness]

Thank you, Adam, for calling and taking time out of your busy day.

[Ben Holderness]

I don't think that you're doing this right.

[Kim Holderness]

Thank you.

[Ben Holderness]

I don't think you're doing it right.

[Kim Holderness]

No, I. I hear. I do know that I have a habit of. I start a thought, a thought mid sentence, and I'm walking away. I know that. But your children also have acknowledged, like,

[Ben Holderness]

you mean the one who, when anytime I ask her a question, she's like, I already told you that.

[Kim Holderness]

That's a little annoying, but.

[Caller or Listener (Adam)]

Yeah.

[Kim Holderness]

No, you didn't. No, you didn't tell me that. Here's.

[Ben Holderness]

Here's. Here we go.

[Kim Holderness]

Here we go. What if.

[Ben Holderness]

Good.

[Kim Holderness]

What if we just for funsies went to see an audiologist with the, with these studies that say any sort of hearing loss?

[Ben Holderness]

You just said we. Are you wanting to go with you?

[Kim Holderness]

I want to hear the answer. I want not. I trust you implicitly on most things. I want to be there to hear the answer from the audiologist that says. And I want to have them know the studies that show.

[Ben Holderness]

Objection. Leading the witness. I feel like I should say you're gonna be leading the witness if you're listening to.

[Kim Holderness]

No, I just. But a professional audiologist who. That is her job or his job, I guess. Men.

[Ben Holderness]

Have you found. You found a female audiologist?

[Kim Holderness]

No, I'm just saying. But I just. I assume every professional medical person's a woman. That's my. So I. If, if she knows the studies and says, you know what, he's fine, then I'm fine.

[Ben Holderness]

This isn't going to be the thing that I just say, forget it.

[Kim Holderness]

Because you're doing so much well.

[Ben Holderness]

All you have to do is say, like, this is going to help your longevity and your brain health. And this isn't the first time I've heard about this study. Right, right. And I do. Like, I. I was told when I was in summer camp that I produce an inordinate amount of wax.

[Kim Holderness]

Why in summer camp did that come up?

[Ben Holderness]

Because they, they. I would get like swimmers ear, and they would get in there and like put the alcohol in it, and then they take the Q tips and go, ah. Because there's like a giant dark red.

[Kim Holderness]

Oh, okay.

[Ben Holderness]

But there's certain people who have a lot of wax. Now, I've also been told by some of those same people that I can't just like, irrigate my ears all the time because that wax is important and keeping you healthy. It's like your nature's mask. It's your ear. It's a mask for your ear. What?

[Kim Holderness]

I'm just allowing space.

[Ben Holderness]

All right, so we heard for you. We heard both sides to the argument. One of us validated both sides. One of us did not. And. And we're moving on now to you going with me to the doctor's office doing this.

[Kim Holderness]

You know how when you, like, your parents age and you have to go to the doctor's office to make sure that they were there now.

[Ben Holderness]

So you want me to go to your. All your doctors?

[Kim Holderness]

Sure. Okay, sure.

[Ben Holderness]

You may have stepped in one there, but you.

[Kim Holderness]

You were gonna love. I honestly would welcome you to join me at the gynecologist to see what women have to go through just for fun every year.

[Ben Holderness]

So at some point, someone showed me the pap smear device.

[Commercial Announcer]

Yeah.

[Ben Holderness]

And.

[Kim Holderness]

Come with me.

[Ben Holderness]

Freaking thing.

[Kim Holderness]

Come with me.

[Ben Holderness]

No, I will. Like, I will, totally. But the first time I saw that, I'm like, what part of the brain does that drill into? And you were like, no, that's for our vagina checkup. I'm like, no. No, it's not.

[Kim Holderness]

Yes, it is.

[Ben Holderness]

I always thought of paps. Newer is like. You know when they, like, how are your tonsils?

[Kim Holderness]

Well, first they get a shoehorn up there, and they crank it open like a tire jack, and then they go in. And the best thing part is, God bless these medical professionals, the nurse practitioners and the OB GYNs are doing this because they. They're trying to make this normal for you. And so it's. It's like. Anyway, so I saw your video.

[Wayfair Announcer]

Yeah.

[Kim Holderness]

And I saw your video, and how's your daughter? She's in school, and it's like, crank, crank, crank. So, yeah, I. Please come.

[Ben Holderness]

Okay. Yeah, I will. I may have stepped in one.

[Kim Holderness]

Yes, I think you did.

[Ben Holderness]

Thinking more of, like, going to one where, like, you don't want me to. To be there, though.

[Kim Holderness]

There's not. I mean, that's.

[Ben Holderness]

Yeah, we'll figure it out.

[Kim Holderness]

You can come to my gastroenterologist. Okay. But he doesn't check my butt there. That's like. That's the colonoscopy.

[Ben Holderness]

Well, I've gone to all those.

[Kim Holderness]

I know.

[Ben Holderness]

Yeah.

[Kim Holderness]

Yeah.

[Wayfair Announcer]

See?

[Kim Holderness]

I mean.

[Ben Holderness]

Yeah, we're good.

[Kim Holderness]

Yeah. More on this after these words.

[Ben Holderness]

You know that hoodie that you can't stop reaching for? The one that just works on the couch, on a plane, out on a trail? Well, I found mine, and I have to tell you about it because I genuinely did not see it coming.

[Kim Holderness]

It's called Paca, and it's made from alpaca fiber, which, if you've never felt it, is softer than cashmere and warmer than wool.

[Ben Holderness]

I know that sounds made up, but I'm wearing this thing right now, and I've been wearing it constantly since it showed up. I love it. I threw it on for the podcast. I've worn it to dinners, and I got two compliments from strangers on them.

[Kim Holderness]

What I love about it, beyond the feel, is that it actually holds. Holds up. No pilling, no stretching out.

[Ben Holderness]

It also thermoregulates, so you're not sweating through it or freezing. It just keeps you comfortable.

[Kim Holderness]

And it doesn't hold on to odor, which, if you're Traveling or hiking, you know exactly why that matters.

[Ben Holderness]

Every pack of hoodie is made, start to finish in Peru, and there's a hand woven Inca ID stitched right into it by local artisans.

[Kim Holderness]

As someone who thinks a lot about where my stuff comes from, that detail

[Ben Holderness]

got me over 250,000 people. People have already picked one up, and honestly, I get it now.

[Kim Holderness]

If you've been waiting for the sign to upgrade your hoodie situation, this is it.

[Ben Holderness]

So go to pakaapparel.com that is paka p a k a apparel dot com.

[Dr. Susan Swick]

I'm Dr. Susan Swick, a child psychiatrist and the host of Talk aboutable. This season, I'm talking with parents and experts about how we tackle the everyday challenge challenges of raising kids. We'll get real about those pebble in the shoe issues we all face as parents and how to build resilience and community through our own experiences. Talk About Able Season 2 from Lemonada Media in partnership with Montage Health and their Ohana center for child and family Mental health is out now.

[Kim Holderness]

Okay, I have to tell you, I was just looking on ebay, where I go for all kinds of things I love.

[Ben Holderness]

And there it was, that hologram trading card. One of the rarest. The last one I needed for my set.

[Guest or Contributor (Sam or similar)]

Shiny like the designer handbag of my dreams. One of a kind.

[Kim Holderness]

Ebay had it. And now everyone's asking, ooh, where'd you

[Guest or Narrator (Leon Neyfak)]

get your windshield wipers?

[Ben Holderness]

Ebay has all the parts that fit my car. No more annoying, just beautiful.

[Kim Holderness]

Millions of finds, each with a story. EBay, things people love.

[Ben Holderness]

Can we go back to the last line real quick?

[Kim Holderness]

Yeah.

[Ben Holderness]

So we did a video about the Columbia House, like, Scandal, which is like another thing where if you remember Columbia house, like, you're one of ours. Yeah, the whole, like, 10, whatever, eight CDs for a penny thing. And. And Kristen took us down memory lane.

[Caller or Guest (Summer or Kristen)]

Hey, it's Kristen from Kalamazoo, Michigan. You were talking about the jewel cases and you're laughing podcast that I listened to, and it brought back a memory, kind of unlocked it. Do you remember that when you would get a new cd, instead of trying to peel all that sticky tape off of the one side that was sealing it together so that you couldn't seal the cd, you could open up the case from the hinge. You would pop the hinge on the top and the bottom of the one side where it was, like, hinged, you would pull it off from there, and then you could peel the whole top part off.

[Ben Holderness]

Really?

[Caller or Guest (Summer or Kristen)]

And then take a sticker off that Way. So you have to, like, peel it off in pieces. I just remember that being, like, super crazy hack to getting into your CD case without breaking the CD case for having to mess with all the stickers.

[Ben Holderness]

Oh, my gosh.

[Kim Holderness]

Right on cue. Anne Marie Tafkey, Midwest neighbor, has produced a cd. This the Judds. Oh, all time greatest hit question, where did you get a CD? Walmart still sells CDs.

[Ben Holderness]

Or is it. Are they, like, records now? People are buying CD players because they like the sound. It doesn't really work that way.

[Kim Holderness]

Okay, so demonstrate to us.

[Ben Holderness]

So she's saying, well, first you have

[Kim Holderness]

to take out the.

[Ben Holderness]

You got to take the plastic off either way. Right. So you get this part off. Great. I can't wait to listen. And then there's one corner that'll open with the top part is still stuck. So some people, like me, were just like, I'll figure this out later. And they just pull it out from the underside, which scratches the CD and angers your brother.

[Kim Holderness]

But she's saying, pull the hinge. She's.

[Ben Holderness]

She's. Oh, my God. So she's saying, you just take these two things off.

[Kim Holderness]

Oh, you just broke it.

[Ben Holderness]

I did, but it does work. Oh, I think that's what you do. You pull the hinges off, and it. I never knew about this. That is wild.

[Kim Holderness]

And then you can very easily. You pull the hinges.

[Ben Holderness]

No, I think you got to keep. Now it's broken.

[Kim Holderness]

Now it's broken.

[Ben Holderness]

You got to keep the tape on.

[Kim Holderness]

Oh, but in theory, yeah, you can then very easily pull the tape off. Wow. What a pro tip that I learned 20 years too late. Do we even have a way to play CDs anymore?

[Guest or Contributor (Sam or similar)]

My truck still has a CD player.

[Ben Holderness]

What year is your. Is your truck 2018. They were still putting CDs in.

[Kim Holderness]

But I have a 2019 car.

[Ben Holderness]

I had a 2015 that had a CD player. I remember when I was, like, just getting out of college, I was like, I'm getting a CD changer. And it was underneath your. But it was all the way underneath your seat. It wasn't inside. So you had to, like, preload it. And then you'd be driving and hear,

[Kim Holderness]

like,

[Guest or Contributor (Sam or similar)]

Internet saying that auto Automakers stopped making CD players standard in most new cars around 2016 to 2020.

[Ben Holderness]

Yeah.

[Guest or Contributor (Sam or similar)]

With the feature becoming almost entirely extinct by 2025.

[Ben Holderness]

Yeah.

[Guest or Contributor (Sam or similar)]

With the 2026 Subaru WRX noted as the final holdout.

[Ben Holderness]

Is that yours? No. Do you?

[Guest or Contributor (Sam or similar)]

No, but I'm just saying. The lesbian Subaru. We want our CDs. Yes.

[Kim Holderness]

We got to play our Indigo Girls. Come on. I have. I still have all my Indigo Girl CDs, so I think you can still

[Ben Holderness]

play those on your phone.

[Kim Holderness]

I know, but it's better on the cd.

[Ben Holderness]

That's the part I don't know that I agree with. Like I said, CD is a digital copy of the song. It's exactly the same. Unless you go over a bump and then it skips to like the next day and you don't even like, you know.

[Kim Holderness]

Well, here's why I have all my Indigo Girl CDs. Because I went by myself. Like backpacking air quotes across France. But I was just like really broke and I was on the trains and I brought literally six CDs. The Disc man and. And the disc man. And I was like playing it. Oh, oh, gotta keep those.

[Ben Holderness]

Anyway, you know what I miss the most about the CDs? It was the last real opportunity to give someone physically a mixtape. There were several years before we got into the iPhones where you burn them on to. You'd have a computer, you'd burn a mixtape onto that.

[Kim Holderness]

And it was a little illegal to do that too. Right.

[Ben Holderness]

You'd have to have either Kaza or Napster. And yes, those were the two.

[Kim Holderness]

You were definitely infecting your computer with all sorts of viruses.

[Ben Holderness]

Oh yeah, I had to like we had to burn that thing when we were done with it. Yeah, because you were downloading from.

[Kim Holderness]

Yeah.

[Ben Holderness]

Shady, shady customers. But once it was on the cd.

[Kim Holderness]

Yeah, it was.

[Ben Holderness]

And now, now if you give someone a mixtape, it's not. It's just.

[Kim Holderness]

It's like a playlist that you're forwarding.

[Ben Holderness]

Yeah, I like it better when you can give it to them.

[Kim Holderness]

Okay, time for our top three takeaways. Kristen on the laugh line told us that the crunch sound we do each takeaway sounds like like a snort and that makes her laugh.

[Ben Holderness]

So I don't know if I've. Is that a post thing? Like what is.

[Guest or Contributor (Sam or similar)]

So, because it was cookie themed, I found someone a crunch sound to like, you know.

[Kim Holderness]

Yeah.

[Guest or Contributor (Sam or similar)]

Make it so it sounds like this.

[Ben Holderness]

Oh yeah, that's good.

[Kim Holderness]

So we have been search in search of a sponsor for this segment. Yeah, we feel like this is a very sponsorable segment.

[Ben Holderness]

In fact, every week we're just giving people free sponsorships to see if they're interested. Like a little.

[Kim Holderness]

Yeah, like a little, little, little bite sized snack. So we were trying the cookie. Big Cookie. Never came.

[Ben Holderness]

Nope.

[Kim Holderness]

Never came calling.

[Ben Holderness]

Neither did Big Chicken Tender.

[Kim Holderness]

Never. We did a three nuggets. Never the big chicken never came calling. So now what about top three takeaways sponsored by UberEats or DoorDash or any other service that brings you food?

[Ben Holderness]

Domino's Pizza.

[Kim Holderness]

Domino's Pizza.

[Ben Holderness]

Instacart.

[Kim Holderness]

Instacart.

[Ben Holderness]

My son.

[Kim Holderness]

My son who has a license, but he's not going to sponsor us anyway, so by Sponsored by any one of those things.

[Ben Holderness]

Yeah. Top three takeaways. You ready? So here's. Here's my top three takeaways from this episode. Vacation guilt is real. This was something that you talked about, right? I. I don't feel it. I. It totally makes sense now. Just like the way that you. You generally are when you're at vacations. Like, there are people who. Who don't feel like they deserve what it is that's going on, and it makes it difficult to enjoy. Yeah, but, like, we're going to work

[Kim Holderness]

on that, you know?

[Dr. Susan Swick]

What?

[Kim Holderness]

How we're going to work on that. We're going to take more vacation. I'm kidding. You know? Yeah. I was feeling unworthy. I think I was like, I should be working.

[Ben Holderness]

Yeah. Everyone. Everyone, not just me, wants to tell you this. You deserve a vacation.

[Kim Holderness]

Thank you.

[Ben Holderness]

Work very, very hard.

[Kim Holderness]

Well, I took one.

[Ben Holderness]

Number two, most people wear underwear during massages. And number three of my top three takeaways is that lesbians. Like CDs. According. This is a. I'm sorry, the single

[Guest or Contributor (Sam or similar)]

lesbian, you know, don't make me. The percentage of no represent all lesbian.

[Ben Holderness]

True or false. Subaru is the last holdout for CDs. And, Sam, I'm not saying this. You taught me this. That Subaru.

[Guest or Contributor (Sam or similar)]

Subaru realized that they were being purchased frequently by lesbians because lesbians like to go on adventures and camp.

[Ben Holderness]

Okay.

[Guest or Contributor (Sam or similar)]

And do things.

[Ben Holderness]

Yeah.

[Guest or Contributor (Sam or similar)]

And so great, they decided to also start marketing towards that audience.

[Ben Holderness]

Okay, so that's. And I didn't know that either, which is fantastic.

[Guest or Contributor (Sam or similar)]

But anyone can buy a Subaru.

[Kim Holderness]

I love a Subaru. Actually, we wanted to get one for our daughter for her first car. We just couldn't find one that was, like, available and in the price range.

[Ben Holderness]

Right. So Subaru likes CDs. Lesbians like Subarus, therefore, lesbians like CDs.

[Kim Holderness]

I feel like that's like a maybe a bridge.

[Ben Holderness]

Is that a bridge too far? Why are you asking me?

[Guest or Contributor (Sam or similar)]

I don't represent all lesbians.

[Kim Holderness]

Okay, time for the credits. And I have to say, we did. We went to a book event with the one and only Jen Hamilton, which,

[Ben Holderness]

by the way, I mean, this has been a while since. But like she, she started a movement that became a number one New York Times bestseller and no one deserves it more than her. It was really cool. Kind of ducking in on Jason being part of it.

[Kim Holderness]

And she was very generous. And our books were available too at the event. So afterwards people like lined up and me signed books and that would. Very generous of her. There was, there were a few men there at the event.

[Ben Holderness]

Six.

[Kim Holderness]

Six men.

[Ben Holderness]

Yep.

[Kim Holderness]

And one of them, and he's like, yeah, I listen to all his stuff and sometimes I'm like, oh, do you? Whatever. He knew the laugh lines phone number. He goes, I know three phone numbers. It was like his wife's, his mom's and the laugh line podcast. And he. Then he's like, 323-364-3929.

[Ben Holderness]

He was just like that.

[Kim Holderness]

First of all, it was. I was so blown away you told me your name. I forgot it because my brain does not accept that information. You please call in, please, you know the phone number because we would love you to like have you record the credits or something. We need to give you a shout out because a dude specifically knowing the laugh lines number, just straight to the heart. 10 out of 10.

[Ben Holderness]

Yeah, I'm going to do it for this one last time. But then next episode you're going to call in because you know the number and you're going to read the credits for us.

[Kim Holderness]

Ready?

[Ben Holderness]

Here we go. Laugh Lines is written and produced by Kim Holderness, Penn Holderness and Ann Marie Tapke with original music by Pen Holderness. It is filmed, edited and live produced by Sam Allen and hosted by Acast. As always, we'd love to hear from you. Please write to us at podcastheholdernessfamily.com or

[Kim Holderness]

leave a voicemail at 323-364-3929 and we

[Ben Holderness]

will talk to you soon on laugh Lines.

[Kim Holderness]

Byee.

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Boost Mobile is now sending experts nationwide to deliver and set up customers new phones.

[Ben Holderness]

Wait, we're going on tour?

[Wayfair Announcer]

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[Ben Holderness]

It's not a tour, not with that attitude.

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Introducing store to door switch and get a new device with expert setup and delivery.

[Ben Holderness]

Delivery available for select devices [e-mail] I'm

[Dr. Susan Swick]

Dr. Susan Swick, a child psychiatrist and the host of Talk About Able. This season I'm talking with parents and and experts about how we tackle the everyday challenges of raising kids. We'll get real about those pebble in the shoe issues we all face as parents and how to build resilience and community through our own experiences. Talk About Able Season 2 from Lemonada Media in partnership with Montage Health and their Ohana center for Child and Family Mental Health is out now.

[Guest or Narrator (Leon Neyfak)]

I'm Leon Neyfak, best known as the co creator of Slow Burn and Fiasco. I had of course heard of OnlyFans, but always with a distant and quiet skepticism. A silent judgment, you might say. Who is actually using this platform?

[Kim Holderness]

Um, I am.

[Commercial Announcer]

Hi, I'm OnlyFans creator and comedian Gracie Kanan. I work from home now. I'm on OnlyFans. And in case you guys don't know what OnlyFans is, ask your husband.

[Guest or Narrator (Leon Neyfak)]

My journalistic curiosity got the best of me when I found out that my own sister had started an OnlyFans account.

[Commercial Announcer]

I'm not his sister.

[Guest or Narrator (Leon Neyfak)]

Just to clarify, it turns out a lot of what I thought I knew about OnlyFans was wrong.

[Ben Holderness]

I felt like I wasted 3.5 years for something that wasn't real.

[Commercial Announcer]

What happens when connection comes with a price tag? Listen to OnlyFantasy wherever you get your podcasts or binge all episodes of Only Fantasy ad free right now only on Audible. Start your Audible subscription in the Audible app or on Apple Podcasts.