Eric Fixes The Grocery Stores

Summary

Podcast Summary

Podcast: Laugh with Me
Host: Jeremy Odem
Guest: Eric Larson (2025 Guest of the Year)
Episode: "Eric Fixes The Grocery Stores"
Date: January 23, 2026

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Episode Overview

This episode of "Laugh with Me" features Jeremy Odem and returning guest Eric Larson, who dives into his latest (and most outlandish) idea for revolutionizing the grocery store experience. The conversation is a blend of comedic banter, personal anecdotes from the hosts' shared high school past, and a satirical take on customer service and efficiency in grocery retail. At its heart, the episode skewers the frustrations of shopping alongside slow-moving customers—both young and old—and escalates to a hilariously impractical but vividly imagined solution for Eric’s grievances.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Awards, Trophies, and Pawn Shops (03:00 – 05:00)

• Eric shares that his "Guest of the Year" trophy is safely tucked away in a bank’s safe deposit box, sparking a tangent about what people do with major awards.
• The conversation veers to football player Adrian Peterson “pawning trophies,” and segues into a debate about what it would take for someone to give up their own trophy.
• Notable Quote:
  • Eric: “I have no children that I'm aware of. How many children would I need to have before you think it would be acceptable for me to pawn the Guest with the year trophy?” (04:14)

2. Predictive Markets and the High School Football Pipeline (05:00 – 07:40)

• Jeremy describes a running joke segment about absurd predictions, including an increasingly real "high school pipeline" for college football careers.
• Discussion about Texas’s cultural influence on Nebraska football, NIL deals for high schoolers, and the opening of Buc-ee’s—“If we really want to be Texas big, we’re going to need to upgrade the facility.” (06:54)

3. High School Rebellion & Shadow Banning (07:51 – 13:21)

• Eric recounts a rebellious episode from high school—skipping school for a football game, getting caught, and feeling “shadow banned” from attending further games for decades.
• Banter about parenting differences and Jeremy’s teen son eschewing a day off to watch March Madness.
• Notable Quote:
  • Assistant Principal to Eric: “If you’re too sick to come into school, one would think that you are too sick to go to the football game.” (08:56)

4. Title Defense and Eric's Lack of Preparation (13:39 – 14:11)

• Jeremy lightly goads Eric for showing up with little prepared, leading into the main event: Eric’s radical grocery store idea.

5. Eric’s Grocery Store Revolution: No “Olds” or Children (18:03 – 29:15)

• Eric pitches a two-part “solution”:
  • Disallow old people and children from shopping, as they “clog up” grocery stores.
  • Proposed mechanism: Customers must navigate a 20-foot vestibule where a store employee attempts to punch you in the face. If you get punched, you can’t shop.
• This propels a riff on eliminating slow and indecisive shoppers, employee selection ("just normal people" doing the punching), and the unintended consequences for society, business, and medical liability.
• Notable Quote:
  • Eric: “The problem was, is there too many olds and children in the store. And so my solution was just no olds and no children.” (18:20)
  • Jeremy: “What if, like, you and I roll up to grab a six pack?”
    Eric: “One of us would have to say, hey, I’ll go first.” (20:14)
• Allusion to the need for bouncers, a frozen peas stand for bruised shoppers, and extended analogies to Pokémon kids slowing down store traffic.

6. Debate: Efficiency vs. Civil Society (29:35 – 37:33)

• Jeremy interrogates the ripple effect: Wouldn’t grocery prices skyrocket? Would anyone want to shop? How do you staff such a place?
• Eric insists, “Not every store needs to do it. Just the one you shop at.”
• Satirical breakdown of acceptable store ratios: “Let’s call it one store per 200,000 people.” (36:00)

7. Kyle’s (Stolen) Napoleon Bust & Board Game Lore (38:18 – 43:45)

• A playful but real-life feud: Kyle (Jeremy’s brother, recurring show character) “stole” Eric's small Napoleon bust, central to Eric’s ritual in competitive board games.
• Quickly morphs into stories about Risk, chess, the bust’s origins, and how Eric plans to recover it—by luring Kyle into his proposed grocery store’s punch-vestibule.
• Notable Quote:
  • Eric: “I’m going to find a reason to get Kyle in a 10 foot by 20 foot hallway, and let’s just say I’m going to be standing in the middle of said hallway and he’s gonna give it up.” (43:27)

8. Final Riffs: Tigers, Sports Analogies, and Emergency Pizza (44:42 – 48:00)

• Jeremy and Eric briefly imagine the consequences of letting someone like Joe Exotic interpret Eric’s system (“No, you cannot put a tiger in the hallway!”).
• They joke about the increased business for doctors treating punch injuries, signage prohibiting “punching back,” and the need for better training on delivery of face-punches.
• Episode closes with joking about Chuck Knoblauch forgetting to throw from second to first as a sports analogy for this bizarre start to Eric’s "title defense," and a pivot to well-deserved pizza.

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Notable Quotes by Timestamp

• On award security:
  • Eric: "So it's in the bank. It's a safety deposit box. As it'd be safe." (03:25)
• On skipping school for football:
  • Assistant Principal (via Eric): “If you're too sick to come into school, one would think that you are too sick to go to the football game.” (08:56)
• On “revolutionizing” grocery stores:
  • Eric: “There are too many olds and children in the store. So my solution was just no olds and no children.” (18:20)
  • Jeremy: “So, you had somebody separate selling frozen peas out front?” Eric: “I don't buy peas, so I don't really care how long the line is to get those.” (24:34)
• On making the grocery model personal:
  • Jeremy: “You want a store that caters 100% to you and eliminates the people that you do not like.” Eric: “Yes.” (26:29-26:34)
• On Kyle stealing Napoleon:
  • Eric: “He took it, he put it in his pocket, and I didn't know it was in there because it didn't make a bulge. And he just waited till I left, and now he's just been holding over my head ever since.” (42:35)
• Episode ender:
  • Jeremy: “I think you’ve made a solid case to the start of your title defense as guest of the year, and that’s with this insane idea.” (48:00)

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Memorable Moments & Running Gags

• The concept of a store vestibule as a test of worth, more for Eric's convenience than practical public policy—repeatedly riffed as “wild,” “insane,” and “not exactly legal or safe.”
• The “frozen peas” punch-icepack stand and Jeremy’s mysterious, loudly growling stomach, serving as comic asides.
• The unresolved saga of the stolen Napoleon bust, symbolizing petty, ongoing rivalry among friends.
• Rapid-fire callbacks to high school days, football, March Madness, and Jeremy’s parenting—grounding the episode’s absurdity in genuine rapport.

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Important Timestamps

• 03:00: Eric's “Guest of the Year” trophy story
• 07:51: Eric’s high school “shadow ban” anecdote
• 13:39: Introduction to Eric's grocery store complaints
• 18:03 – 29:15: Main segment—Eric's “No Olds, No Children” grocery plan
• 38:18 – 43:45: Napoleon bust backstory and rivalry with Kyle
• 44:42: Satirical government policy talk
• 48:00: Episode wrap-up and sports analogy

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Tone and Style

Conversational, irreverent, and packed with inside jokes and callbacks. Both Jeremy and Eric oscillate between dry, satirical delivery and self-deprecating humor, making the hour feel like a cross between a comedy brainstorm, nostalgia session, and a lampooning of customer service clichés.

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Who Should Listen or Read This Summary?

Anyone who enjoys absurdist humor, quirky takes on everyday annoyances, and a dynamic between longtime friends will appreciate this episode. Shoppers with a sense of humor about the annoyances of public outings (and a high tolerance for satire about “punching old people and children”) will find plenty to laugh at—even if they dare not take Eric’s suggestions seriously.

Transcript

[A]

This is an I heart podcast. Guaranteed human. Welcome back. It's a brand new episode. This is Laugh With Me, a podcast. Jeremy Automobile. Jo. And we have. We have an interesting situation in this week, this episode, I guess this week, Eric Larson, he was the 2025 guest of the year, and he is in fact going to be in studio. He texted Kyle, now my brother, you know, and Kyle, you know, he runs grocery stores. He. He's got this idea for grocery stores. It's a little out there. We're gonna talk to him about it. I'm not quite sure how it's going to help the grocery industry, but Eric's always fun to have in here. So Eric is back in his first episode since winning guest of the Year. Johnny, I would just. It would be helpful if you didn't say a damn thing again. I know it's brand new year, it's 2026, but let's not change. Change a good thing. Okay, buddy? So maybe just don't. That's not a joke. I'd rather you not speak and just let Eric and I handle the goods. But. So, yeah, let's get right to it. Eric Larson on Laugh With Me. Today. Or today it's the Laugh With Me Fireball Studio is what we're calling it. No ad. Hashtag, no ad. Because they didn't pay me for it.

[B]

You know. You know how, like, all the good band names are gone? Yeah, like, Fireball really did good getting in as early as they did.

[A]

Yeah, they did like. And you know what? In Pitbull, capitalized. Capitalized.

[B]

Really? Really, you know, put that in concrete.

[A]

Yes, he did. All right, well, cheers. Cheers me. Well, if you couldn't tell already. Oh, man, that was good.

[B]

That was really good.

[A]

We got a guest in studio. He's been here before. He is a giant in the transportation industry. He was the fifth speaker at Central. He's a former fantasy football champion and just recently became the 2025 laugh with me podcast guest of the year. He is. He's Eric Larson.

[B]

Thank you. Thank you.

[A]

Thank you, Johnny. I honestly, I thought Johnny maybe wasn't going to give you any applause. I was like, damn, Johnny.

[B]

He was. He was dick. He was really offended when I handed him my coat, my.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

Top hat and my cane when I came in. Right.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You know, he doesn't like to see people come up in the world, so.

[A]

Yeah, I'm actually, I'm kind of surprised you didn't bring your trophy. I thought you normally have that thing on you, but not today. Not today.

[B]

So it's in the bank. It's a safety deposit box. As it'd be safe.

[A]

Yeah, as it should be. That's. I often wonder what people do, like, with major awards, you know, when they have trophies and whatnot. And. And, you know, not that I'm comparing guests of the year trophy to like an Academy Award. Right. Or an Emmy. I'm certainly not doing that, but I am in this moment. What. What do people do with those? Do they put them on their mantle? Do they have them in, like, a secured lock? Because there's some value to those, I would assume.

[B]

Yeah. Do you know who had a lot of kids?

[A]

A lot of kids?

[B]

Adrian Peterson.

[A]

Oh, yeah, he did.

[B]

He had like, eight kids. And I feel like about every year and a half you get a news story talking about how he, like, is pawning off, like, a trophy or. Or something.

[A]

Oh, right.

[B]

So I have no children that I'm aware of. How many children would I need to have before you think it would be acceptable for me to pawn the Guess with the year trophy?

[A]

One and a half.

[B]

One. So what? One and a half. That's. That's a curious number.

[A]

Yeah. One and a half. You would already have to have the one child, you know, and you've got one on the way.

[B]

And I think you've been doing betting spreads too much, because I don't know anybody who has half a kid.

[A]

Shout out, where's the line? Yeah, that's the thing is I. I do tend to put everything in halves anymore, which is really making.

[B]

Would you just, in an absolute. Could you stop no. You know, quivering on this number?

[A]

I would love to say yes, but it's going to be difficult. It's the world I live in.

[B]

You need to stop trying to make six and a half happen. Like, it's. It's not going to capitalize. It's not splitting the difference. Nobody thinks it's clever.

[A]

I think it's possible when football season's over, I'll get it out of my system, but I don't know. We'll see. Oh, funny story. So you. You're familiar with the predictive markets.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

You know, so a segment we're doing now on where's the Line is we're coming up with things that we could very well see this year on the predictive market. Right. And there's some tongue in cheek with it, but one of the things I brought up just yesterday was that the University of Nebraska Lincoln football team is gonna have a farm system. The pipeline is gonna run through Millet south high school just 40 miles away, right?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And because they had just brought in a quarterback from Illinois who's transferring to Omaha, who's going to go to Mid south, but he's going to live in Lincoln, then he's going to go to school there the next year. Right. Literally. So I brought this up yesterday because of the quarterback thing that this year, that's going to be the start of the pipeline. Just today there's a wide receiver from Texas coming. He is also going to Middle South. He is also going to Lincoln after his senior year. Like it's a thing. This is a real thing.

[B]

How crazy is it that 20 years ago we'd be looking at the college for the pipeline into the pros.

[A]

Into the pros.

[B]

Yeah. And now here we are in 20, 26. Well, we gotta have that high school pipeline.

[A]

Yeah. Isn't that wild? And it. I. My understanding is in some states like Texas, this is the thing. This is what. This is what they do.

[B]

Well, and that makes a ton of sense because we just found out that Nebraska is going to be getting its first Buc EE's. So Buc EE's big Texas brand.

[A]

Yep.

[B]

Now we're going to start treating football like Texas, man.

[A]

That's at Mid South. You're going to need to upgrade that football stadium because big things are coming. Big things are coming. Not that you don't already have great things back to back.

[B]

I can't believe you're dissing on the bu.

[A]

I'm not. Yeah, well. Beautiful establishment. It's just if we really want to be Texas big, we're going to need to upgrade the facility. Which means they are going to need some donors. So I don't know anyone listening wants to become a big time donor for Milit High School athletics.

[B]

Do they have nil yet?

[A]

Oh, those kids are getting paid. I mean, yeah, they got to be getting paid something, right? Have to be. Who are the donors? I mean, we're the alumni of Millet south. Like I am. Shit.

[B]

I mean, I'm. I'm shadow band still, I think from Miller south football games.

[A]

Just because you haven't gone to one.

[B]

Well, I mean, that's what you determine.

[A]

What shadow ban is, if you've decided not to go or it just hasn't ever come up to go. Your shadow man. All right.

[B]

Flashback to the fall of 2000. Okay, so I didn't, you know, somebody, maybe myself, maybe somebody else calls Mode south that morning and says Eric is not gonna be to school today.

[A]

Somebody maybe you, I have no idea.

[B]

Who made this call?

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Yada, yada, yada. The day goes on. The football game is at night. I'm in attendance. And I believe I was talking too loud. You know, things got a little rowdy sometimes in the third quarter when we hang out with our friend that was in band.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And I think we were yelling and horsing around and such.

[A]

Well, because you got to speak over all the music.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, obviously, that's our.

[A]

I mean, that's our fault for hanging around the band.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It's too loud.

[B]

So lo and behold, I get pulled aside. Talking too loud, horsing around too much. Need to go see the assistant principal that next morning. Oh, and what is the first thing that assistant principal said? If you're too sick to come into school, one would think that you are too sick to go to the football game.

[A]

Oh, busted.

[B]

So, haven't been to another game since.

[A]

Really?

[B]

Yeah, I'm afraid I think they probably still got my picture up.

[A]

You think you're on their radar? It's. You said that was in 20. That was in 2000.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

Okay. It's been nearly 26 years. You think you're on their radar still?

[B]

Well, I mean, they haven't apologized yet.

[A]

Oh, that's a good call. Hey. All right. Well, I think this is an awesome platform to demand an apology from Millet South Athletic. Do we want it from the faculty or do we. We want it just from somebody.

[B]

I don't need it from our principal who had a, you know, checkered past, but.

[A]

Okay, so we're not asking for anything from the principal.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But somebody who represents Millard South High School in Millard, Omaha, Nebraska. We're looking for an apology.

[B]

I'm. I'm ready to forgive.

[A]

Yeah, well, no, you seem like it. And honestly, the fact that I've never even heard that this was still, you know, laying on your shoulders, like, I figured this is something you're willing to let go. I would have heard about it constantly if it was a thing that you were still, like, upset about.

[B]

I didn't want anybody to get in trouble, you know, for whoever that was that called me out school that day.

[A]

Yeah. So when they were like, well, if you were too sick to go to school, you'd think you wouldn't go to the game. Did you fess up to. Well, I wasn't really sick.

[B]

No.

[A]

No.

[B]

I kept doing it for about another three months before I got caught doing that.

[A]

So you kept calling out?

[B]

Well, yeah, I mean, it was kind of sickness.

[A]

Did you have.

[B]

It was so easy. It was so easy.

[A]

Yeah. You just call.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, you call, you get. You make sure you're getting the voicemail system. You never want to talk to a.

[A]

Live person, so you call early.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. So you, you had to call one time. The one time I got caught. I got greedy.

[A]

They were like, eric, is this you?

[B]

No, the call went normal.

[A]

Oh, okay.

[B]

So I'm sitting at home watching the Price is right. Probably about 10:30. As one does, the phone rings. It's my dad.

[A]

Ah. So they called. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And then he called the house.

[B]

And then he called the house and he said, what's going on?

[A]

Wait. And you answered.

[B]

Well, what was I going to do? I. I was bus. Busted. I was busted.

[A]

Why would you answer the phone? You obviously do not answer the phone. That's wild, man. That's a lot of young people right now that listening are like, what do you mean, phone? Like, they'll just text you. No, there wasn't any of that back then.

[B]

There's a web portal. As long as you know your parents password. Yeah. How do your kids get out of school?

[A]

Yeah, well, mine. Mine are like, weird about it. Like, they want to do good. It's wild.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

So they don't really miss unless they're really sick. I even. I think it was Ferris Bueller. They. Oh, yeah. Well, I don't even think they've seen that movie. What? Yeah, they're probably old enough to appreciate that movie. Yeah, they're teenagers. They appreciate that movie now. But no, Braden. Last March, I'm like, dude, let's. We'll call you out and you can hang here and we'll. We'll watch the basketball games on the first day of the March Madness, you know, he's like, nah, I don't want to miss this, like, test or quiz or whatever it was. You could make that shit up. What are you. What are you doing?

[B]

Yeah, what are you farming brownie points for?

[A]

Right. So then, you know what I did? I watched Basketball Day, and then I really rubbed it in how good the games were. He.

[B]

He had to have been, I mean, March Madness, not too long until his birthday. After that, he had to have had his eye on some sort of gift.

[A]

But the thing is, we brought it to him and was like, come on. Yeah, let's just hang out, watch some basketball.

[B]

This is like door number one or door number two. Like, hey, do I get the brownie points and hope that door number two is better, or do I take door number one, which I know is sitting on the couch God, I would take door number one. I would sit on the couch all day and watch basketball.

[A]

Well, you gamble it and you just hope that in two weeks all's forgotten and, yeah, hey, it's my birthday, you know. Yeah. But no, that was so they're a little different in that regard. They don't normally do any of that, but, like, I don't know.

[B]

I give. I give your wife a lot of credit for that.

[A]

You give her the credit?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

I mean, I went to high school with you.

[A]

All right. You're aware of my. Yeah, my. My stature. Yeah. That's good. Okay, well, that's fair. Well, it's good to have you back. I'm gonna. I think this is your first true appearance of 2026.

[B]

It is. It is on.

[A]

Laugh with Me as you look to defend guest of the year title defense. Yeah, you. I. You got any, like, tricks up your sleeve? I mean, it was a big year last year. I mean, you went on vacation numerous times. Lots of good stories. You got any tricks up your sleeve this year?

[B]

That's. That's going to be the tough part. You know, I haven't started booking that yet, so, I mean, I really didn't show up with much to talk about today. I feel like that's why our conversations gone the way that it's going.

[A]

Well, one thing you did come to the table with is. And I know because you texted Kyle and I that, you know, Kyle famously works in the grocery industry.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

I used to. And you've decided to revolutionize the grocery industry as we know it today.

[B]

Well, and just this is a tough audience. It's tough presenting ideas to you guys because you guys have poo pooed so many of my ideas. Like, these are guaranteed hits and you guys do nothing with it.

[A]

Well, usually it's like, hey, this. The front doors at this location are just bad.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And that location has nothing to do with us, so there's nothing we could even do about that. Not to mention whenever you're gonna like tear down a wall of any type, that's like a million dollars.

[B]

Oh, so. Oh, so you got to sell some more bananas. Like, what?

[A]

It's a lot of bananas.

[B]

Like, I don't see what the big deal is.

[A]

Speaking of bananas, though, before we forget about bananas, there was another podcast and they were like, you won't believe this. What do you think's the. You're one selling item at Walmart for an entire year. What do you think that item is in it? And. And I instantly was like, oh, it's bananas. And they're like, well, it's got to be like a Mountain Dew or. Oh, probably toilet paper. And we're like, nope, bananas. And it, like, blew their mind. And I'm like, what? You really got to think about this because anytime you have an item like that that's rung up by the pound, I mean, that stuff adds up fairly quickly. And bananas. I mean, everybody buys bananas whether they eat them or not. They got a bundle of bananas on their counter.

[B]

You know, it still does annoy me anytime that I don't get around eating the banana.

[A]

Do you make banana bread?

[B]

I don't know how to make it.

[A]

Okay. You don't know how to make banana bread?

[B]

I do not.

[A]

You don't know how to use Google either, it sounds like.

[B]

Yeah, well, I mean, who has the time?

[A]

You. One thing I. So baking and cooking and whatnot used to be fairly easy around here until I started getting involved and I started adding halves to everything. And then now it's like, the ingredients are a mess.

[B]

No, but it's callback. That was a good callback.

[A]

That was good. Yeah.

[B]

No, so you know, the banana, when they're still on the counter, but they're all, like, brown and spotty and stuff, it's just like, I'm not eating that.

[A]

That bothers you?

[B]

It bothers me because, you know, my brain then doesn't register with the fact that when I was at the register, that six bananas was like a dollar thirty.

[A]

Oh, right. Yeah.

[B]

You know.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's really not that much. And people get worked up when it jumps. Jumps. It goes up a couple of pennies.

[B]

It's. It's amazing when they talk about, like, when the tariffs were a big thing last year at this time. There's, like, a country that. It's like 90% of their trade is like, bananas. And it's just like, how many bananas do you like, what's your margin?

[A]

Right.

[B]

Like, you know, do you. You make 2 cents a pound, and that. That runs the entire country, apparently.

[A]

Well, yeah, because you're putting out so many pounds.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

That. That would make sense. Yeah. No different than gasoline. You know, when you really think about it, gasoline is a penny business. And, you know, every level of the distribution is selling and making something off of the gasoline.

[B]

Right.

[A]

It's literally the same deal. Penny business. But you're selling so many gallons that it just. It adds up. Gosh, there you go. You learned something today.

[B]

I did, I did.

[A]

So anyway, grocery idea. You have this grocery idea. Yeah.

[B]

So I Sent this to you guys. You guys hardly said anything about it, which I took as a little bit of an insult to begin with, because I identified a problem and I identified a solution. So the problem was, is there too many olds and children in the store?

[A]

Okay.

[B]

And so my solution was just no olds and no children.

[A]

Now, Kyle did respond because he said, well, then, where will you guys shop? I think referring to us as being old.

[B]

Oh, I thought he was calling us children.

[A]

No. Well, either way, he's.

[B]

He was wrong.

[A]

He was, you know, coming at us with something. So that's, that's interesting because.

[B]

Is it.

[A]

Where do you find yourself in that mix? Like, what's the, what's range?

[B]

I mean, I, I. So I took that information, I took his response. I internalized it. I thought a little bit more about it.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

And I was just like, all right, so when I say olds and children, I'm not really defining which is which or, or how to come to those measurements.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

So I thought of a better idea.

[A]

Better. Is it completely different or is it.

[B]

So it's, it's just a way for us to determine in a fair way who gets in the grocery store and who doesn't.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

So my idea is that there's one entry point to the store.

[A]

Yep, there already is.

[B]

And so at this entry point, you build a 20 foot by 10 foot room. So like a long hallway. 10 foot wide. 20 foot long.

[A]

It's like a vestibule.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Top. Okay.

[B]

And then in the dead center of that room, you put an X in there and you have a store employee that stands right there. Now, people, when they want to come in the store, only one person can be in that vestibule at any time.

[A]

So you're going one person at a time.

[B]

One person at a time.

[A]

What if, like, you and I roll up to grab a six pack, One.

[B]

Of us would have to say, hey, I'll go first.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

And then the other one would have to follow.

[A]

It's like an elevator.

[B]

Yeah. So you enter at the one end of the hallway.

[A]

Okay. How long's the hallway? 20.

[B]

20 foot. 20 foot.

[A]

My. Okay.

[B]

And so what you have to do is you have to get by the store employee without them punching you in the face. And like, I'm not talking, like, smacking on the side of the head or that they're going to do anything fancy if they can basically square up and punch you in the eye.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You can't come in the store.

[A]

So you're. So are you assuming. So when you're eliminating Olds and children. You're just assuming this store employee can take down olds and children.

[B]

Well, just that they're not going to have the reflexes, the motor ability. Because I've seen some of these people push carts.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

And they've got, you know, they need to. They need to go to the olds store.

[A]

Right. So there's gonna be a whole separate store for the old.

[B]

I assume they'll figure it out.

[A]

And then, like, maybe like a. A store. I don't know. I'm just spitballing Toys R Us. We'll call it Toys R Us for the Children.

[B]

Yeah. So basically, if you go in, you know, person squares up, they punch you in the eye.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

You turn around, you leave.

[A]

Yep.

[B]

Next person comes in. You know, I mean, children at a certain age, they get. They get kind of clever and agile. Yeah. And it's going to be really tough to pin them down. That's fine. I'm not worried about running them over. But like a toddler. A toddler isn't going to. They're not going to be smart. They're. They're probably going to walk up to the person and they're going to get punched in the eye.

[A]

They're still getting punched. They're not getting, like, pushed aside.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

What, the liability for punching people in.

[B]

The face for a place that they want to get in.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So, I mean, I feel like people would learn pretty quick.

[A]

Let's go. Let's. Let's circle back. We'll come back to the punching in the face. Let's. What's the problem with the olds?

[B]

Those are just slow and they kind of clog everything up.

[A]

Okay, that's fair.

[B]

Doesn't seem like they know what they want, where they're going.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

They're probably retired.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

They probably just. Yeah, they have. They have a lot of time. So it's just like, oh, well, you know, let me look at this packet of rice. Like, oh, it's mesquite.

[A]

Yeah. You'd have an older clientele hanging out in the grocery store from very early in the morning.

[B]

Yeah, they slow me up. They slow me down.

[A]

Sometimes I'm buying anything.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

They're hanging out, chatting.

[B]

Might as well be the Pokemon kids.

[A]

The Pokemon kids. You remember those Pokemon kids? I do. Back in the day when Pokemon was. I mean, I guess it's still a big deal, but it was. It was different big deal back then. Like, kids actually played the game well.

[B]

You had no way to share.

[A]

So. True.

[B]

You had to physically have people in the same spot. As you. To show off your. Your goods.

[A]

That's a good point. We didn't have the smartphones like we did do today. And so they would go to like the, the, the cafeteria area of the grocery store and just play Pokemon on like a Tuesday night.

[B]

It was carrying a big Pokemon binder. Probably gonna slow you up, huh? Gonna make it a little bit tougher to get by that guy or gal.

[A]

I mean, so the olds slow you down, the children slow you down.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

How quickly are you wanting to get in and out of the grocery store?

[B]

I mean, I want to set a new record every single time I go in there. Like, I know what I want.

[A]

So it's competition for you?

[B]

Well, I mean, against myself. Like, I want to constantly be improving.

[A]

So you're. Since you're limiting who's in and you. And I'm assuming you want like minded people going into the grocery store and getting past the guy that punches you. Are you challenging the storm plate and you, you're just saying, oh, I'm gonna get past this guy. Guy punching people?

[B]

Oh, 100%. I get by him.

[A]

Okay, so you also are getting challenged. Like, everybody's getting every single person. So then you get through. The employee standing on the X doesn't punch you in the face. What if he does punch in the face? But you just. It doesn't bother you? You keep going?

[B]

No, no, you got to leave.

[A]

Okay, so if you get punched, you're out. Yeah. It's like tag.

[B]

Yeah. Okay, so you just leave? You leave. You probably.

[A]

It's like a dodgeball situation.

[B]

Yeah, maybe there's a stand outside that just sells like frozen peas. You know, something to push against your, your eye so it doesn't get. Get as black.

[A]

Well, that was nice, you know, so you're not.

[B]

I would like a little side hustle maybe.

[A]

Yeah. So you had somebody separate selling frozen peas out front?

[B]

I don't buy peas, so I don't really care how long the line is to get those.

[A]

But do you have like a bag of frozen peas in your freezer right now, just specifically for situations like this?

[B]

I'm not afraid of getting punched in the face.

[A]

Okay. All right. Okay. So the grocery store with no olds and no children and just people zipping through as fast as they can. I mean, is it the same setup as you see today with all the departments?

[B]

It would just be. The only thing you have to change of the store is just building the entryway. Otherwise you can leave everything about the store the same.

[A]

So all these years that you've Been complaining about the front doors at this specific grocery store was the problem. There was nobody standing in the middle of a long hallway. Bunch of people.

[B]

Well, checking people.

[A]

Checking people.

[B]

Checking people to make sure that they're not gonna get in my way.

[A]

All right, this is wild. So you. This is gonna impact a lot of things at the store. I mean, they're gonna sell nearly as many things you're asking. So the staff, I mean, the staff's gonna be running around, like, wild, trying to keep up with all the people running around fast through the store to fill, you know, well, so.

[B]

No, no, hold on, hold on, hold on.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

So I mean, you have the extra employee that's sitting there, punch people in the face, but you don't need any extra staff. I mean, that's the thing about it. It's like, I'm a very responsible shopper. Like, I'm not intentionally, like, messing stuff up. I don't have, like, old limp hands that are just going to knock stuff over.

[A]

Old limp hands.

[B]

I'm not like a little kid that's just, you know, licking everything that's within the 2 foot of the floor.

[A]

Say, I've never seen a child in grocery store just licking stuff.

[B]

Yeah, well, who knows what they do? It's disgusting.

[A]

What? What? This is wild. So you want a store that caters 100% to you.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

And eliminates the people that you do not like.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Okay. We're getting to the bottom of this. So it's not really so much a suggestion for the grocery industry as much as they don't cater enough to your wild dreams.

[B]

Well, so. But I feel like there'd be a lot of appeal out there. I feel like a lot of people want to shop like me.

[A]

All right. I. There is a lot of people who want to get in and out quickly. Yeah. So to your point, that's true.

[B]

I'm like, we could.

[A]

They.

[B]

They could put all self checkouts. They wouldn't even have to have, like, they just need like two people up front.

[A]

No, you can't do that. You can't do that.

[B]

What do you mean you can't do that?

[A]

Stores were doing that. It became a problem twofold. Number one, people were like, oh, you replaced all the people's jobs. Look at this. Even though that's just not true at all. Number two, people just are stealing stuff. Oh, all right. I mean, they're not usually actually using the self checkout.

[B]

So We've got the 20 foot by 10 foot entryway with the employee in it.

[A]

Yep.

[B]

What if we did a 20 foot by 5 foot exit.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

With an employee in the middle.

[A]

Were they standing on the X or.

[B]

No, they're standing on the X or in the middle.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

And you got to show your receipt to get out or they punch you.

[A]

Okay, so that's Costco. Costco? You're been to Costco? No, you got to show your receipt. They dig through your cart, they make sure that everything's there. Yeah, I've never been punched, but it wasn't stealing anything either. So.

[B]

What would you want to steal something if you knew that it was going to lead you getting punched?

[A]

Well, no, no. Did you hear my stomach?

[B]

I. I heard it earlier. And you chose to not acknowledge it.

[A]

Well, first of all, I'm wearing headphones, so I don't know what you can hear, but that was so loud. It had to have been heard. Like, my stomach is upset that this is even a topic conversation.

[B]

I think it's. I think your stomach's nervous that you'd get punched in the face.

[A]

I'm not getting punched in the face over getting in a grocery store. Get it? What's the age? Like, what are we talking about here? Like, how close are we to the point of getting punched in the face just for. Oh, I. Being old?

[B]

I'm probably a good 30 years from getting caught with it.

[A]

So we are. You say you we are.

[B]

You are probably closer to eight. I give you eight.

[A]

So it's what.

[B]

You're kind of slowing down.

[A]

I am slowing down, Damn it. Although, hey, I'm also tall, so I got breaking news. Oh, breaking news. Johnny, you're going to want to listen to this, because this is going to impact you because you may have a job longer than you thought you were. Okay, I had a doctor's appointment earlier in the week, and it turns out the new medicine I'm on is working. Yes, it turns out there is a chance and my Crohn's disease will go into remission. So we are on path to victory here, which I would think gets me a few more years into the grocery store. What do you think?

[B]

It. I mean, it just comes down to your moves.

[A]

Yeah, that's true. Well, I'm certainly physically. Like, I'm still agile. Like, I still move. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

But when you're not having to, you know, test those moves against Braden out on the basketball hoop, tall man, how you gonna. How you gonna keep sharp?

[A]

I tell you what, it's. It's. It's something that I never thought. Like, you. You know, you and I, we Went to high school together. We actually talked. We opened the show talking about north, South. You know, after school there was like a summer, like a spring where we played a lot of basketball, right. A lot of one on one. And I was, I remember it as I was tearing some up, like I was beating some people. I was winning some basketball games. I mean, you can correct me if I'm wrong here, but I distinctly remember winning some games. Flash forward to, you know, the last few years and now I've got a son that's at that same age that I was back then. And boy, that fella, he. He puts me in my place sometimes. And it really. Mentally I'm still that kid in the backyard of my parents house beating people. But physically I'm getting stuffed. What's up with that?

[B]

I mean, I seem to remember you getting stuffed back then.

[A]

No, no, that's not true at all. Wait, how if. All right, let's just for argument's sake say you're correct.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

Even though I don't believe you are, let's just say you are correct. How is it possible that I remember it so differently? Because I distinctly remember just beating people. Except for Mike, who had my number. Like, he was like my arch rival. Like he, for whatever reason could out physical me and had those longer arms and could.

[B]

He was, he was by far the best defensive player.

[A]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[B]

Because the rest of us were like, well, I don't want to touch the other person.

[A]

Which is wild because you're, you were the tallest.

[B]

Yeah, by far. It was just like, I don't want to box this. Like. Yeah, he's gonna, he's gonna touch me like, no, no, I'll back up a little bit more. Yeah, Mike was just like.

[A]

He's an animal.

[B]

All hands.

[A]

Well, I remember being pretty good.

[B]

Why don't you keep that image in your head? Don't, don't ask me to pop, pop that bubble.

[A]

Because like if. Yeah, because if you pop that bubble, like I don't even know where to go from here. Yeah, like I'm, you know, luckily. I mean, who knows with, with the news I just shared and the Crohn's potentially going to remission, I mean, who knows, maybe I'll get back out on the court. I mean, who knows? Honestly?

[B]

Yeah, I. I think if you get back on the court, you're definitely not gonna get punched in the face by.

[A]

The, by the grocery guy.

[B]

By the grocery guy.

[A]

What kind of fellows or ladies are standing on the X to punch people?

[B]

Just normal people.

[A]

Just normal people.

[B]

Don't matter. I mean, it's just another thing to schedule.

[A]

There's no age. I mean, there's like age limits to everything now. Yeah.

[B]

I mean, well, if they're bad at.

[A]

The job, like, can you imagine if you rolled up and you were able to just walk around?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know, I mean, if they were.

[B]

Bad at the job, I mean, you got to pull them off of it. Yeah, but I'm sure that's the same as like a cashier. Like, you know, you probably have this cashier up there and you're like, you're a really nice person, but you are the slowest cashier that I've ever encountered.

[A]

Ever. Yeah, you encounter that quite a bit. You're.

[B]

We're not putting you back at the deli. You're gonna make sandwiches now.

[A]

Yeah. You know, well, we need fast people in the food service too.

[B]

We.

[A]

Well, if I was working in the grocery store, I guess I. Yeah, I still think of it that way. Like, anytime somebody, Maybe it was 20 plus years, whenever somebody brings up something, you know, grocery, operational or whatever, I instantly, my brain starts spinning like, all right, well, what's, how's that work? Like, how. What kind of person do we need? What's it going to cost? Like, I. I just start running the numbers of everything. And as you're talking about extending the front lobby into this long 20 foot hallway and then having somebody standing in the middle prepared to punch people in the face, just choosing who gets in, who gets out. They're not choosing, they're punching everybody.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. So I guess it's not really a choice. It's. You're punching everybody. But to, to have that you create.

[B]

I think there are some employees that would excel at that.

[A]

Oh, there'd be some that would want this job.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Yeah. This is something you would mean. You have to give them breaks. Their, their fists, their poor fists would get pretty sore quickly.

[B]

It also, like, as I'm kind of thinking about it now, you'd almost need like a bouncer or two, like at the front doors because, you know, like, grandma gets punched in the face. Like she could have family member that wants to come back.

[A]

So here's the thing. Now you've got, you've got. All right, so a normal, like, busy grocery store in the Midwest.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

20,000 to 50,000 people through the door every week. What, What? You're gonna diminish that. Big people aren't gonna want to get punched. I mean, there's just gonna. People who avoid the grocery store altogether, which I Guess to your point, it just plays into what you're saying. Yeah. You want less people going to the.

[B]

Grocery store when I'm shopping there.

[A]

Oh, my. Okay. How many times do you go to the grocery store in a week?

[B]

About once.

[A]

Okay. You want to change society as a whole to make it more comfortable for you on your one trip a week, there are people that go every day.

[B]

They better be fast.

[A]

Damn it. Well, that's going to impact a lot of things. I mean, have you thought about that? Have you thought about how that's going to impact the grocery industry, the food industry?

[B]

I mean, not every store needs to do it.

[A]

Just the one you shop at.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Okay, so you're specifically calling out the stores that you shop at. What if you switch towns? What if you move again?

[B]

Well, I mean, I feel like this grocery model would work for one store in every single town, at least. Let's call it one store per 200,000 people.

[A]

That's what you're calling the store. The store is called 1 per 200,000.

[B]

No, no, no. That's, that's the ratio. So if you got, like, if you got Atlanta, that's got 6 million people in it, 30 of these stores could be there. Omaha, with 3 or 600,000. Three stores. We put three stores. One in North O, one in south O, one in west O.

[A]

You've, I mean, depending on what part of town you shop in, I mean, you probably have this situation going on right now.

[B]

Lincoln.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

They, they can't survive without the olds. I mean, that, that's. The entire town is the olds, so you don't need one there.

[A]

That's. I, I, I ran a grocery store in a small town that was predominantly olds. It would have been a problem for me. Yeah, man. And you would have wanted this because you would come visit, what, a couple times a year? So you're like, well, I would. I need to be able to go to the yard store. Yeah.

[B]

It probably would have been one of them where I would have, you know.

[A]

Yeah. This is crazy.

[B]

Hey, I'll. I'll come to Des Moines. You come visit me up there. Yeah, you know, that's my halfway.

[A]

Well, I think this would cause a ripple effect through the food industry as we know it that would be detrimental. I mean, is this going to. I mean, it does add a level of service, I guess, to the people who do make it in, because it's quicker. Right. And you have less people in the store.

[B]

Plus, children don't buy anything.

[A]

They do not buy anything. So to your point, that does help the people who do get past the guy or gal who's punching.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

How does this impact grocery prices?

[B]

Oh, they. They'd have to go way up.

[A]

Oh, yeah. Okay. Okay.

[B]

You got a much, much smaller market.

[A]

Yeah. I mean, we had a president who ran his whole campaign on, I'm going to lower grocery prices. You can't just be raising prices for your. For your needs here. Well, it's not going to happen. Okay. All right. Well, I. I certainly don't think Kyle's going to get behind this. I mean, famously, he's in the grocery business. Kyle also has something of your personal property.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

How long has he had that little Napoleon. Little Napoleon statue, the bust.

[B]

It's got to be going on a decade now.

[A]

So for the listeners who don't know who Napoleon is. Let's not judge. Let's not judge. But for the people who don't know who Napoleon is, can you give us kind of a quick synopsis on who he is? I say quick. Yeah.

[B]

Well, if you go to the fall of the Roman Empire, very few human beings have had the impact of Napoleon.

[A]

Napoleon. I was talking about Napoleon Dynamite. Okay. This is. What do they call him?

[B]

The Emperor of the French.

[A]

The Emperor of the French. Okay. Yeah. Get a history lesson here. So you have this, like, pocket Napoleon bust. Where did this come from? Like, give us this.

[B]

It's not designed specifically to go into the pocket.

[A]

Oh, it's not?

[B]

No, it's not.

[A]

But it's pocket sized.

[B]

It's like you have knickknacks that are all pocket sized here in your studio. I don't go here and say, oh, this coffee mug is pocket sized.

[A]

First of all, that's. That was a dumb statement. Coffee. There's no coffee mugs that are pocket sized. That's a coffee mug. And in fact, that's a Spicoli and Meg in the morning coffee cup. There's nothing. There's nothing to shame there. Okay. That's like going in your. In your pocket. We've got a Topps Allen Ginter 2024 Tim Robinson baseball card. That's not going in anybody's pocket. You could bend it. That's not happening.

[B]

Why would you put a cast iron Napoleon in your pocket?

[A]

Well, I'm just saying it could. It looks like it would fit in your pocket. I guess it wasn't made to go in your pocket. No. Okay.

[B]

No, you don't carry that around.

[A]

All right, that's fair.

[B]

What, you couldn't fly on an airplane. You couldn't go in A baseball stadium.

[A]

Is that true?

[B]

I mean, a big chunk of metal in your pocket.

[A]

Am I misremembering how big this thing is?

[B]

No, it's. It's really small. It's like the size of this fireball bottle.

[A]

Okay, so pocket size. Okay, so get. Give me the backstory on the. On the Napoleon. Not the guy. The. The bust.

[B]

Can I talk more about the guy?

[A]

You can do whatever you want.

[B]

Napoleon would have gotten to any grocery store. He's very low to the ground. Very. Like a cat.

[A]

Yeah, he could have been. He could have been. Maybe somebody would have called him a child.

[B]

So, friend of the pod, Bob Roberts.

[A]

Oh, yeah. Guest of the year nominee.

[B]

Yes. Was over in France. And he picked it up for me, gave it to me.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

And I had a tendency to pull it out of my coat pocket. Not pants pocket, coat pocket. When challenged to a game of Risk. And I needed his advice as a attempted world conqueror.

[A]

I think my favorite part of this is there's people that are probably like, he just carried that thing in his pocket at all times just in case a challenge at the game of Risk were to come up. Not like, oh, you knew you were going to play Risk. And I brought. The deployment is just.

[B]

This was.

[A]

If. If by chance somebody challenged me on the streets or wherever, I would pull this out. I would pull this out.

[B]

I feel like I probably pulled it out at some point during a chess game against you. You know, just again, give me that strategic intuition.

[A]

I still think that that's probably the first time I ever saw. You would have busted it out on, like a chess game or something.

[B]

You know what's funny is, you know, so I read this biography about Napoleon. It's like a 1200 page book.

[A]

What's funny about that?

[B]

Well, that I did that like 10 years ago and that I got the bus to Napoleon probably 18, 19 years ago.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

So it way predates the obsession with Napoleon.

[A]

Okay, so. All right, so we've got the story on where the bus came from. Kyle. Yeah. So that's the thing. How did Kyle end up with it? Why do you not have it back? How long's it been?

[B]

He stole it.

[A]

He legit just stole it. Yes. Where and when and why?

[B]

We were playing Game of Thrones Risk for the Royal Rumble.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

And he took it, he put it in his pocket, and I didn't know it was in there because it didn't make a bulge.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And he just waited till I left, and now he's just been holding over my head ever since.

[A]

Holy Cow. So that would have been like. Was that. That was at his old house in. Oh, my. Holy cow. That was a long time.

[B]

That was a long time ago.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And.

[A]

Yeah. Thief. That's like. I'm running the numbers. 2017, 16, 2016.

[B]

God, life was so much better in 2016.

[A]

Had to have been around then. Yeah. Right. Wow. So I know Kyle. I know Kyle. He displays it in his home prominently. I've seen it.

[B]

Wait, what?

[A]

Yeah, I've seen it. I've seen it as recently as last summer. So what do you. What are we going to do about this? Are we going to go there? We going to get this thing? What are we. What are we going to do?

[B]

I'm going to find a reason to get Kyle in a 10 foot by 20 foot hallway, and let's just say I'm going to be standing in the middle of said hallway and he's gonna give it up.

[A]

He's gonna give it up. All right, so you were getting a job at a grocery store and you're. Or is he the puncher? His grocery store? Is that what you're saying?

[B]

I don't think Kyle has the strength to punch.

[A]

Yeah, Yeah, I don't. It's just. You wouldn't put the boss out there punching people anyway. They'd want people in to sell stuff. Right?

[B]

Yeah, you.

[A]

It would just be counter. Counterproductive to put the boss in the lobby to turn people away because you want people in the door to buy things.

[B]

So, yeah, he's got. He's got a vested interest in getting as many people in the door as possible. So, yeah, it wouldn't make sense to put him in.

[A]

So this rule almost has to be like, government mandated because you. What business is going to be like, yo, I need somebody keeping me in check. I need somebody standing in the door punching people so that way we can filter out the olds and the children.

[B]

Do you think you could pass this idea on to, I don't know, Joe, Exotic Joe?

[A]

Yeah, I mean, you know, he's got their ear.

[B]

Yeah. I mean, he's friends with Trump, so, I mean, if anybody could tell the government about this.

[A]

Yeah, I'll pass it on to him, actually. And just see, that's a good call. Maybe I need to get him back on to ask him about this idea and what he can do about it just before he gets out, because. Yeah, I don't. He's a wild card once he gets out of prison.

[B]

You're gonna have to phrase it that you don't like just from the be like, even before you mentioned the punching thing. Yeah, like, no, you cannot put a tiger in the hallway 100%.

[A]

You cannot.

[B]

Yeah, like, that's. That's dangerous.

[A]

Let's just know right now no tigers are going in this lobby. Even though it's the correct size.

[B]

They would eat the toddler.

[A]

Yeah, they would. Like, hey, maybe that's. This is the answer you've been looking for.

[B]

Why don't want to get rid of the toddlers? I just want them to get punched in the face so that they don't come and shop there until they're spry enough to get past the puncher.

[A]

Are we concerned about concussions?

[B]

No.

[A]

Okay. All right. Are we concerned about hemorrhages of the brain?

[B]

No. No.

[A]

Is there going to be training on where to punch and how to punch?

[B]

Well, again, it's got to be right in the middle of the face.

[A]

Okay. So we're gonna be breaking noses, and that's fine. Okay. Boy, this is really gonna help the medical industry. So hospitals and clinics, I mean, be.

[B]

Busy, you know, the. The Sam's Club, you know, will have, like, a doctor's office inside.

[A]

Who? Sam's Club. Most grocery stores have that.

[B]

Well, so, you know, much like the peas, you'd actually have that still, but it'd be facing the outside of the store.

[A]

There you go. Man. That would drive business to him.

[B]

You'd need a prominent sign, too, that said, you're not allowed to, like, punch back.

[A]

They're not allowed to punch back. No, you're just. You can. So you can try to avoid it, right? Like, you can try to die.

[B]

You can't preemptively punch the person that's trying to punch you.

[A]

No. That's not fair. Yeah, interesting. I don't like it. I don't like it at all. I'll be honest with you.

[B]

What about the other idea that I had for the grocery store of just you leaving the store, your hands are full with the bags of just an employee out there that would. You know, you're obviously clipping your sunglasses over your collar because it's the summer. That would just pull your sunglasses out and put them on your face because your hands are full with the groceries.

[A]

I remember having an answer for that, which is the. The guys and gals who carry your groceries out for you so you yourself can put the glasses on your face, just let them take it out with you or leave it in the cart. Why you gotta carry everything? How would.

[B]

This would slow me down? This would be major.

[A]

It would not slow you down. To have somebody carry the groceries for you. This is absolutely insane. Okay? You've no sense of. For a guy who's a giant in the transportation industry, you're really killing business. There's gonna be less trucks coming into those grocery stores. Did you think about that? Did you hear my stomach? Did you hear that a lot of.

[B]

Grocery stores use private fleets?

[A]

We gonna eat pizza?

[B]

Yes. I think it's about time.

[A]

It's about time to eat some pizza. Damn it. Well, I think you've made a solid case to the start of your title defense as guest of the year, and that's with this insane idea.

[B]

Are there any analogies for that in sports of just somebody that starts their title defense with just this?

[A]

That's. We're gonna have to think about that. Like, what would be the equivalent of that? Because that is. Boy, that is something. I mean, that's like Chuck Knobloch. I mean, this is an old reference, but winning rookie of the year and then forgetting how to throw a baseball from second to first, I mean, that's. What are we doing here?

[B]

You got that Yankee money, though.

[A]

He did get the Yankee money, which, at the end of the day, that's what we're all striving.

[B]

That's. We're all one.

[A]

That's awesome. Hey, Eric, thanks for coming on the show with your grocery idea. And we need to get that Napoleon back, though.

[B]

We do.

[A]

I'm serious about that. We need to. We need to really think about that, like, how we're going to get that Napoleon back, and I think we should really put something together and see if we can get it back sooner or later. Yeah. Because it's not Kyle's property at all. I don't like that he has it. Y. And you just haven't been the same person, honestly, for the last 10 years since we haven't had. Sam.