← Let's Be Honest with Kristin Cavallari
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The following podcast is a Dear Media Production. This is, let's Be Honest with Kristin Cavallari, a podcast all about getting real and open on everything from sex, relationships, reality tv, wellness, family, and so much more. And just a fair warning, there will probably be some oversharing cause I got all the power. Yep. Happy New Year. I can't believe I am saying that, but it is officially 2026 6. So yes, happy New Year. I hope everybody had a great holiday season and did something fun on New Year's Eve or just got a great night's sleep. And I hope everyone's feeling well rested and excited about the new year ahead. I also just celebrated a birthday. It is my last year in my 30s. I still feel 18 sometimes. So even though obviously a ton of life has happened, I think I will probably always in some way feel like 18, 19 years old. I don't know. I don't know what that's about. But yeah. So I'm excited that it is a new year ahead, a fresh start. I always like to write out my goals every year and just kind of have a nice roadmap where I think the year is going to go. Of course, there's always twists and turns that are unexpected, but I'm just feeling really good about what's to come in 2026. So I hope you guys are all in the same boat. But today we're going to do another Hills episode, and today's episode is from season five, and it's episode 14. It's titled Old Habits Die Hard. So we start the episode with Lo and I at lunch, and the very first sentence out of my mouth is, I'm telling her that I'm gonna go home to Laguna beach for the weekend and go see my dad and my step. And couple things here. The first one being there's no real buildup or mention of my relationship with Low. I mean, the season started with essentially the girls just talking a lot of shit on me. And, you know, Lo and I have hung out a few times, but, like, Lo was talking shit on me, and then she's just at lunch with me all the time. I think it's kind of bizarre that they didn't really, like, bridge that gap or address it at all. There's like zero mention of my relationship with Low really, at all. And in this particular lunch scene, it actually did seem like we were the best that we had been. And again, obviously, a lot of it is editing. I don't think Lo and I ever had ups and downs by any means. I think it was always pretty steady and steady in that we always were friendly, we always had a good time together. Lo and I never had any issues until the Birkin incident, which is in the next season. But up until that point, there was never any, like, just easy. An easy friendship. But I just thought it was funny. There's like zero mention of it. Okay. And then, you know, okay, so I do go to Laguna in this episode, and I do see my dad and my stepmom. And I had zero recollection of filming this scene, which I'm surprised about, because between Laguna beach and the Hills, I filmed with my dad very few times. I definitely filmed with him, but it was not much. And I never really liked filming with him, if I'm being completely honest. And so that's why I thought I would maybe remember this, because I have to imagine I was really nervous for this scene because they have me going to my dad's house, which, by the way, it said my parents house. Nicole, my stepmom, was hardly a parent. I'm surprised they didn't just say my dad's house. But okay, they said parents house. And also, I never lived in this house. So this was the house that my dad built right next to Lauren Conrad's parents house. And so this house, I. I never actually lived in. This is not me coming home to my. My high school house or anything like that. I always had a pretty un. I was gonna say unstable relationship with my dad, a pretty weird relationship with my dad. I was always very uncomfortable around him. And I really did not like filming with my dad because my dad always sort of put on a show as a typical narcissist does. And so that's why when I watched this back, I was shocked that I didn't remember it. And right away, that scene is my dad and I in the kitchen, and he's opening up a bottle of wine and he's like, oh, do you want some cheese and some wine? And it's the middle of the day. I'm like, oh, he's calling me baby. He's being so sweet and caring. And I just watched it like, what? Wow. Okay. I don't know who that person is, but okay. Also, the other thing is. And because I'm like, well, where's Nicole, my stepmom? And he's like, oh, she's teaching a yoga class. She'll be home in a minute. I literally, as I'm watching this, I was like, oh, she must never come in. I. You guys, I was floored that my Stepmom filmed the Hills because. Let me explain something to you. So in high school, when MTV came and when they first came, we filled out. We are. We grabbed these 20 page packets, these huge packets, and, you know, I, I took mine away and I was really beefing mine up. I've. I've talked about this before. This is no new information, but I talked about my stepmom a lot in my packet, and I talked about how I didn't like her and she was closer to my age than she was my dad and which. Okay, hi. I know I. I cannot judge that now, but at the time I judged it and I. I just really. I talked about how much I disliked her. Okay. And I remember Nicole grabbing my packet, Literally grabbing it out of my hands in high school during, you know, the whole casting of it all, as I'm like, in the process of filling it out, grabbed it out of my hands. You guys. Reddit obviously saw what I said about her, and she was pissed. Rightfully so. I get it. But she always, because of that, had this weird. Not weird. She always had this hate for mtv, this complete disdain. She actually threatened to leave when the second season of Laguna beach was happening. She told my dad that if I did the second season, she was going to move out. And my dad said, then get the out. It was a bit more intense than that, but there was some. It got physical, let's just put it that way. It was a really nasty fight that I witnessed between them anyways, without getting into too much detail about that. So. She always hated mtv and I think kind of hated me because of it. And maybe. I don't know if I've told you guys this. I want to say I have, but my. My dad and my stepmom, my. My senior year. So this is. As the show was airing, or maybe it had. No, yeah, it was airing because it was October. They had a Halloween party. And I came home after being out with my friends all night, Alex Hooser. And I came to my house and she was me for Halloween. She had just gotten a nose job. Okay. So she's all bandaged up and her eyes are bruised and all that good stuff. But then she had on a jean skirt and Uggs and like, put in hair extensions and. I mean, she was me. She was me for Halloween. Like that just. I'm just telling you this to paint the picture for you. So when I tell you that this scene was, like, quite literally, my jaw was on the floor. I mean, I. I was shocked by that. This scene actually Happened. So I'm. But it did, and it was a decent scene. I mean, I think, you know, my dad on camera, I think comes across pretty well. And it's wild for me to watch it, especially now with what's happened with my relationship with my dad, how he's no longer in my life. And to see this, I was just like, I. I don't know. It was kind of hard for me to watch anyways. Oh, and that's the other thing. I did not go home to Laguna very often. And when I tell you, I mean, when I. I lived in LA from age 18 until 24, I. I'm not kidding. I went home, probably. You could count him on two hands, and some of those being holidays, like Thanksgiving and Christmas. I mean, I really. I was not going down to Laguna to go see my dad and hang out more than I really had to. So this was a shock, for sure. But anyways, to go back to the scene with Low, Jade and Brody come up, and she tells me that they break up every other day. And, you know, basically, we're talking about what a tumultuous relationship they have. It's toxic, blah, blah, blah. And then Justin, of course, comes up, and I tell Lo that, you know, he stood me up. And Lo says, she warned me about Justin. He did this to Audrina for four years. Or. Sorry, Low warned me about Justin. And I say, you know, he did this to Audrina for four years, and I won't do this. You want to play this game? Let's go. And I know. I know for a fact that at this point, obviously, Low knew that the whole Justin of it all was complete bullshit. I mean, this is us totally playing up the storyline and, you know, doing what we think we need to be doing for the show, obviously for the story that's going on on the show. But I liked watching this scene with Lo and I. I don't know, to me, it seemed easy. It seemed like we really do genuinely, you know, care about each other. There's. They're no longer trying to make it seem like there's this weird awkwardness between me and her that really, to me, felt so forced the last few episodes, only because I knew my relationship with Lo, and Lo and I never had a problem with each other. So. So then we go to Stephanie at Audrina's house, and a large chunk of this scene is wild lines, but they're talking about how Audrina and Derek have been hanging out. So I think it was the last episode that we talked About Audrina went on a date with Derek, and they didn't actually show any of the date. So in my head, I was like, well, it must not have gone well, because all they showed was like, right when he picked her up in the car. But I guess it did go okay because they've been hanging out again. And Adrina is just kind of comparing her quote unquote relationship with Derek to her relationship with Justin. And she's saying that with Justin, she was very insecure and just that it. There's a huge difference there. She also says that Justin Bobby has been texting her and saying, is it really over? And she's saying, you're dating Kristen now. And I don't know. I feel like MTV has. From Laguna beach, right? And obviously, the first few seasons of the Hills, they had this formula that they. Well, that worked, obviously, one of them being the love triangle with Stephen Lauren. And I mean, that was. You know, they struck gold with that. And then I think with friend groups, friend drama, and I think having your main character be the victim in a lot of ways. And I've seen in this episode, it was really starting to be obvious to me what they were doing is how. Because this whole Justin Bobby storyline with me, him and Audrina has a hint of a love triangle to it, but also they are sort of making it seem like Justin Bobby is breaking my heart. And I'm upset about it. Right. And how I can't believe this is happening to me and. And me watching it back, I really don't like that at all, because it is so not who I am. That. Because to me, I'm like, I would never. I would never do this, or I've never. What's the right way to say it? Because I think for the situation that they've handed me on this show, I think with who I am, I'm handling it in the way that I would if it were happening to me. And that's what's so interesting about these shows where I do. I do think it's a lot of improv in a lot of ways of, like, you're improving yourself almost. That's a really weird dynamic. But I would never. Back in the day, I never would have admitted that a boy was hurting my feelings. I think that's the difference is I know my mental state at that point in time in my life, and I had a major fear of being vulnerable. I never would have admitted that someone was hurting my feelings. But also, if someone hurt my feelings and really did stand me up I never, ever, ever would have kept it going. I was very good, and I still am very good at if someone is messing with me or not treating me the way that I needed to be treated. I have never had an issue with closing the door, walking away, telling someone to kick rocks. So I think. I don't like that, that they have made me this. This kind of sad girl of. And, like, allowing him back into my life. I just. That's not me. It's not authentic. I get really uncomfortable when something isn't authentic. But again, for the show, for entertainment purposes, sure, it's great, you know, but my point is they have this sort of formula that they think is going to work, and they really, really run with it. The other thing I thought was really funny was at my dad's house, when it's just my dad and I, and we're in the kitchen, they. My dad asks me if I've seen Steven or Lauren. Guys, if that's not an MTV line, I don't know what is. The fact that they told my dad to ask me that is so, so out of left field and ridiculous. I think it's so obvious now, but obviously at the time, I don't think people realized. But, like, what it's. You guys. I'm 22 years old. It's been four years since I graduated high school. No, I don't talk to Stephen or Lauren or. I don't see them. Like, they weren't even a part of my. My world at that point. It's so funny to me, actually. I shouldn't say that Stephen and I kept a friendship, but it's not like we talked all the time. I think I maybe saw him twice after I graduated high school. I mean, it wasn't. It wasn't often. Like, my point is, we didn't run in the same circles. My dad obviously knew that, and I don't. I just thought that was, like, such an MTV line. My dad also. God, he says, is Brody still kind of in love with himself? And I sort of. I felt like I was really awkward because I went like. Like. Because I think I was shocked that that came out of his mouth. I just thought it was kind of mean. And also, Brody is. Not that you could say that about a lot of people, but Brody was never full of himself or like. I actually think Brody had always had a big heart and was pretty humble. I mean, especially with where he came from. And to me, what my dad was saying about Brody was such a projection. It's not even funny. Like, not Even funny. And you know, that's the thing that's a lot of times people's criticism about other people, it. That's really about them. And it was very apparent to me in that scene. I was like, whoa. I just thought it was. I didn't like, I didn't like that. I wish. You know, it's funny too because at that age I didn't know how to stand up to my dad. Not that I had to stand up to my dad, but I didn't know how to be like, hey, dad, that was pretty harsh, I think. Cause you know what? I'm a big old fucking empath. And I didn't want to admit that until recently, but in that moment, I think part of the reason I didn't say anything was because I didn't want to call him out on camera and make him feel embarrassed about it on camera. But also there was that another piece of it where I didn't learn until my late twenties how to stand up to my dad and how to be myself and speak my mind and disagree with him. I never felt like I could ever, ever, ever. So in that situation it was like. Well, I just, I didn't really know what to say. And by the way, I did not have the kind of relationship with my dad where I would tell him about Justin Bobby and I, obviously Justin Bobby, because it's a show thing, but like, let's say I was, I had, I was dating someone sort of like I was Justin Bobby in real life. I never would tell my dad about that. My dad and I didn't have that kind of relationship. I wasn't like telling my dad stuff. So I don't know, that scene was just. That was wild to say the least. 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And I'll be honest with you, I didn't think she was that bad. I thought she was just having a good time and having fun. But then the next day, they have Stephanie and Heidi at lunch, and Stephanie is telling Heidi that she really thinks that Holly is completely out of control. And she was saying every time that they go out, she's basically that same way. She's getting after it. And she wants Heidi to talk to her, which, by the way, with this storyline. So I was watching it, and I'm always very skeptical, of course, when I watch this show because I don't, you know, I. If I wasn't involved in the scene, I don't know for sure if something was real or not or if there was a seed of truth to it. And then they just ran with it. So anyways, I'm always like, oh, I should text A friend. I did. I texted Heidi because I wanted to know if the Holly drinking storyline was real. And she told me, yes, it actually was very real. And that Holly now is sober, guys. So here, let me find my notes on this. Holly is sober. I'm kind of jumping around. We're going to come back to some of this because I do want to talk about their sort of intervention that they had. But. Okay, so Holly has been sober since 2011. That's incredible. And not only that, you guys, she has a recovery center. So it's called women's recovery. It's an outpatient treatment center for trauma, mental health and substance abuse or misuse with optional sober living. So I just want to give a shout out to Holly, who is doing amazing things out there and helping people. And not only did she help herself by getting sober, but she's out there helping a ton of other people. And I just think it's really incredible. So shout out to her and. Well, here we'll just talk about her intervention that she had. So Heidi and Spencer, they do. They meet her at Spanish kitchen, which used to be, oh, such a good restaurant in L. A. It's no longer there, but they used to have the best nachos. Okay, side note. Well, actually, this is a crazy story. So I called off my engagement in 2000. Let me think about this for a second. When did I call off the engagement? We got engaged in 2011. Okay. So I met my ex husband 2010. We got engaged 2011. So I must have called it off the fall of 2011. Okay, so called it off. Well, okay, this is crazy, guys. So I called off my engagement. This is really fucked up. And the next day I was doing a photo shoot in wedding dresses the next day. So what does my dumb ass do? Because I don't know. I go to the photo shoot. I went to the photo shoot and I shot I don't know how many different wedding dresses. Let's call it five or six. God. I want to say it was for Life and Style magazine 1. One of those tabloids. I don't even. I don't think that's around anymore. But I. And I didn't. I don't. I don't think I had my ring, you guys. Oh, I'd have to fact check that. I want to say, though, I gave my ex husband the ring and. And he left. He was out in LA with me and then he left. But I went through with this photo shoot like a real dumbass. And. And then afterwards I met up with one of my really good friends, Pip, who, if you've watched Very Cavalieri, you definitely know who Pip is. She's my. I call her my big sister. She was living in Australia now, but I've known her since I was 18. And she met me at the Spanish Kitchen, and we took so many shots of tequila. And what I loved about the Spanish kitchen was it was always empty. It was kind of dark, so you could just like, get in a booth and you could haul up and just slamming shots, talking about how I called off my engagement and holy shit, and eating these incredible nachos. And so that is my best memory of the Spanish kitchen. But, like, why would I do that? Why couldn't I just cancel the photoshoot? Oh, well, I'll tell you why, actually. I think I couldn't cancel the photo shoot because I didn't want it getting out that I had called off my engagement yet. So in my head, I'm like, I'll just go through the. I'll go through with the photo shoot. And then, like, I don't know. I never thought five steps ahead. It was always very in the moment, right this second. I didn't think about anything, not even long term, short term. It was just always in the moment. And it was. I think I was trying to prolong the information, the news coming out that I called off my engagement. And obviously that ended up being what I mean, that must have come out. And I don't remember the timeline of events, if it came out that I had called off my engagement and then the wedding dress photo shoot came out, or if the wedding dress photo shoot came out and then it got released. That I don't know. I don't know. But not one of my better decisions in life. Anyways. Okay, so Heidi and Spencer have Holly come to the Spanish kitchen, and Holly orders a margarita. So it was during this scene that I texted Heidi, because in my head, I was like, there's no way. There's no way they're having an intervention. And she orders a margarita in the middle of the day at lunch. I just thought it was, like, too perfect. But no, this was real. So Holly is saying that her drinking is standard and that. And Heidi is saying, well, that's the issue, is that you think this is normal. So Holly does come around to it, and she says it's time for her to break up with alcohol for good. And, guys, I mean, this must have been. No, this was 2010. Is that right? No, this may have been 2009. So this was either 2009 or 2010, it must have been 2009. So she obviously didn't give it up right then and there. But this was definitely the start of her becoming sober. And hey, I mean, hats off to Heidi and Spencer and, and Stephanie because they obviously were concerned about her and for good reason. And so she did get sober. So I love, I love knowing what happened and going back and seeing this and seeing how it all began. So anyways, okay, so let's jump back now. So then they have Justin and I at my Malibu house and he's making me dinner and watching it. He's in the kitchen making dinner. And then I come in and I seem kind of surprised that he's there. And then later in the episode, I do say that he stalked me down and found me and like basically implying that he just showed up at my Malibu house and was making me dinner. Obviously we all know by now, right? This is complete bullshit. This was production led. We knew when to be there. We had call times. Again, I never stayed at this house unless we were filming. So that's just funny. So he says he's been out of town for a little bit and that's why, you know, he's been mia and he's basically saying that, you know, he's making me dinner. This is his way of saying sorry. I tell him that, you know, he gets one meal to say sorry. And he asks me at one point, you having fun? And I say, I'm having the time of my life, knowing myself, knowing the scene, knowing the situation. I know that I said that extremely sarcastically. I think that to me, with the two of us, there is this underlying sarcastic tone to sort of everything. I pick up on that. Obviously I know too much. I know know everything, but I don't know, I just, I wasn't buying it. And then later, so they have. So he's. He makes me dinner and he says he's never made a girl dinner before. I say, no guy's ever made me dinner. And I tell him that I told my dad about him. And I'm like, are you gonna tell your mom about me? Cause he's like, if I told my mom I made a girl dinner, like, oh my God, she wouldn't believe it. And I don't know, it's all just a little like much to me. And then when dinner is over, well, okay, actually. So at one point we're saying how tired we are. And I think I look drunk, by the way, because I'm like melting in my chair. I remember this being a very Long night. And again, I mean, filming was. It's a process. It was a very. It was a process. It wasn't like you just eat your meal and you get up and leave. Like, they're gonna keep you there until they get everything that they need for this scene. And we were obviously drinking wine, so I think I was. I probably really was tired. And when we get up, I'm like, you know, he's like going to clear the plates. I'm like, I'll do it later. Like, knowing damn well that, like, the whole crew is probably gonna do it. Like, as soon as we get up from this table, we are wrapped. So I'm like, let's just fucking go. Like, let's go, let's go. And they make it seem like he is spending the night and we're probably gonna go do the damn thing. Which guys never again. Never happened. Never spent the night with Justin Bobby. And there was a part of me that was like, are we about to kiss? Are we about to kiss? Like, walking up from eating? But we never did because again, I think. I think the only time we actually kissed was at the club when they had asked me to kiss him. When I say I told my dad about you, I think that was actually a wild line. But, yeah, they have it seen. Like, like, we've got, like sexy eyes towards each other. He calls me a wild card. All right, I want to talk to you guys about Cachava. As you guys know, it is a new year. Of course, everyone right now wants to set goals for the year, especially when it comes to health. I do think it's important to take a look at our supplements from time to time and just our nutrition in general to really do an overview and make sure we're getting all of the nutrients down that we need. So that's where Kachava comes in. Kachava is an all in one nutrition shake that's crafted with the highest quality ingredients. Cachava provides clean nutrition to fuel wherever your day takes you. There's no filler, no nonsense, no artificial flavors, colors or sweeteners. It is non gmo. And not only are they offering you the best quality ingredients, but I've really noticed a difference in my energy. 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And what a perfect time with it being the top of the year. Guys, let's make this part of our priority. And right now Tonal is offering my listeners 200 off your Tonal purchase with promo code honestly. That's Tonal.com and use promo code honest for 200 off your purchase. That's Tonal.com promo code honest for $200 off. Let's take a quick moment here guys to talk about Taylor Farms. If you are a salad fan, you're going to want to listen up also, you know, I do feel like New Year we're all probably wanting to eat a bit healthier. If you're like me, you know you let loose a little bit for the holidays. I was eating a ton of cinnamon rolls and I do feel like now I kind of need to reel it back in and so I'm very excited about Taylor Farms because they are making being healthy this new year very, very easy and also very fun. With Taylor Farms chopped salad kits, it's easy to get your salad together, and they come in so many great flavors, like the sweet kale. They have a Caesar and a really good avocado ranch Mediterranean crunch that I love. They're super fresh, they're crisp, they're delicious. And my whole family loves them, which is always a plus. And the best part, truly, for all of us busy moms and just busy people in general, is that everything is ready to go in seconds. There's no chopping, no slicing or leaving half a cabbage in your fridge, and everything is fresh greens. It has really yummy dressing and toppings, and everything is just ready to go. All you have to do is just mix it up, and a delicious salad is served. If I can do it, you can, too. Grab a Taylor Farms chopped salad kit and get your salad together. Okay. So then they cut to Audrina's date with Derek. And by the way, what really made these shows was the music. I mean, the music really was spot on, because if you didn't know how to feel about a scene or a situation, the music was going to tell you. I mean, and that's true with movies. Great movies and all great TV shows. The music really does help. To me, really good music in production is almost like a subliminal message where it's like. It's telling you how to feel. And these shows really, really nailed it with the music. So Adriana's on her date, and she asks Derek if Justin Bobby knows that they've been hanging out. And Derek says he called him, but he didn't pick up. And, you know, there's. There's this whole back and forth about Justin Bobby. I even come up, and Adrina is saying that I'm in for a real surprise with him, which then prompts Derek to be like, are you over him? And Audrina's like, yeah, but there's, like. When that infliction goes up. Yeah, like a question mark at the end. I don't think that was probably in response to Derek asking her that. I definitely think this scene is very heavily edited, but it plays perfectly, and it's really setting the stage for the last scene of the episode, which was shocking to me. But, okay, we're saving it. So, okay. Then randomly, they had me going to Brody's condo. Like, what the. This is so random. But, okay, here we are. So Brody answers the door. He calls me Mrs. Bobby. Okay. Cute. By the way, loved filming with Brody. Brody got it. Brody was always a team player. Brody brought his a Game. Like, there were certain people that I really enjoyed filming with because it was almost like some people battled with it still, which, by the way, I fully understand, because I. I felt like that more on Laguna Beach. But, you know, again with the hills, it was like some of us were all in. Like, 100 all in. Tell me what to do. Tell me what to say. And again, it just made it more fun for all of us. And Brody was one of those. And so, you know, like, Brody understood the assignment, let's put it that way. Bentley is there, his dog. So little backstory on Bentley. Brody bought me Bentley when we were dating. So, again, I. Brody was my first boyfriend in LA when I was 18. I met him immediately out one night at a. Was it a Maxim party? It was something like that. I think it was a Maxim party at the Roosevelt Hotel. And he was there, and he came up to me, and that's how we met. And then, honestly, we met that night, and we were inseparable ever since. I think we dated for about a year. I was 18, he was 22. So he bought me Bentley, and I just had no business having a dog at the tender age of 18. I don't think I realized how much responsibility dogs are. And that was in my party girl era, and it just did not work with my schedule. So, anyways, he kept Bentley. Well, his mom really kept Bentley. Okay. As much as Brody wants to take credit for that, his mom. His mom kept Bentley. But Bentley, little Frenchie, little French bulldog, he was so cute. So anyways, he's there, and it's cute to see him, of course, but I immediately launch into Jade, as one does, and he says that. Well, I tell him. I'm like, someone told me that you guys break up all the time. And by the way, I was proud of myself for saying someone, instead of being, like, low, told me, could have easily done that. You know, just want to mention that. So he says that they never actually break up, but they essentially threaten each other with it. I asked him if Jay knows I'm there, and he says that he told her when I started coming. By the way, I love that he says, when you started coming around again, it's like, everyone makes it seem like I didn't hang out for years. Now all of a sudden, I'm coming around again. Like, I never was part of this friend group. I had always been around in la, but I love that. Like, that's the storyline on the show. But he says that he told her when I started coming around again that he and I are really good friends, and that was it. I tell him how. How Justin just showed up at my house in Malibu, and what's going on? I'm catching him up to speed, and he says Adrian is going to be coming after me, and Brody's sort of like, you know, wondering if I have something up my sleeve with this whole Justin Bobby of it all. Like, am I doing it despite Audrina? Like, what's actually happening here? And I'm like, no, no. I really do like him. Like, okay, so then the last scene of the show. Of the show. Of the episode is the Thompson Hotel, and Justin and Audrina meet up. And they're playing it as though Audrina texted Justin to chat. And in, you know, perfect MTV fashion, you know, if this was real life, well, I don't know, maybe you would meet up, but I would imagine this would actually be a phone call instead of like, a, hey, let's go meet up and talk about this. But by the way, when I saw that they were meeting together, I was like, oh, my God. What the. As a viewer and obviously as me being the other woman in this, I was like, the. But I wish. I wish I could get Justin on to talk about all this. But here's what I'll tell you about this scene, you guys. Okay? So to me, it really did feel like there was a lot of real emotion here. And I think. I. I think. I think that because having filmed with Justin and getting to know him to an extent, I, like, he and I were always kind of flirty and fun and playful. And to me, this scene felt very heavy in a lot of ways, and, like, there was still some wounds. And I also thought it was interesting because this whole time on camera, Justin has been saying to me that he and Audrina were basically nothing, right? And then in this scene, he's telling her that he felt weird about putting someone else on the back of his motorcycle, kind of implying that Audrina was the only girl who's ever been on the back of his motorcycle. And I would call major bullshit on that. I would think there had been a ton of girls on the back of his motorcycle. So maybe that's him sort of playing it up for the show. I don't know. But then they get into Justin talking about how he would never date one of her really good friends the way that she's dating Derek, who is, of course, one of Justin's really good friends. And you can tell Justin Bobby is pretty pissed about this. To me, that seemed like genuine like, he was genuinely mad about that. And by the way, though, because here's the thing. As much as Justin obviously did play it down with me about what they had, clearly they had something, right? Like, we all know that. And Derek was his real friend. And I think because Adrina thought Justin and I were a real storyline, we were really dating. That was really happening. She did go out with Derek, I think, to sort of spite Justin. I, I. That's my opinion. And so, like, those dynamics and those emotions and feelings are very real, where for me, stepping in as the newcomer, me being, like, cool, I'm gonna play this up and do whatever the hell MTV wants me to do and have fun with this. I've got no skin in the game. Like, I'm not affected by any of this. And I didn't really put that in perspective back in the day. You know, I was just out for myself. But I also sort of thought everyone was kind of aligned with me and kind of game for everything, which, you know, again, I think that was. I think Audrina, it was probably harder for her because she really did like Justin. You know, she really is going on dates with Derek, I think, trying to move on from Justin because she's upset that I'm, you know, in her mind, dating him. Like, I think all of that was very real. Again, I know that because when I. And I've said it a thousand times, but when I told her Justin, I didn't actually date, she was shocked, shocked. So I think this is very real. And obviously Justin, to have, you know, dated Audrina for four years, whether in his head they were boyfriend or girlfriend or not. But the fact that she was in his life for four years, there's obviously real emotion there. And he does tell her that, you know, he and I are not together, which is true. And he says a big part of him will always have feelings for her and that he would never be able to say anything was better than Audrina Patridge ever in my life. I mean, it's kind of fucking sweet, right? It's kind of sweet. And also, I'm watching it like you're a scumbag, because you just told me that nothing ever really happened with you guys, but now you're telling Audrina that no one better will ever come along, so. So, yeah, you're kind of a piece of shit if that's how you're playing both girls. And then Audrina says that she won't talk to Derek anymore, and Justin says, well, don't let me Stop you. And I mean, you can tell, like, they've got feelings for each other. And now again, I say this every week, but I'm like, what is going to happen? Like, I'm really on the edge of my seat, you guys. I've got no recollection of this storyline and where this goes and what. I just. I don't remember any of it. I don't remember any of it. So I don't know. But fuck, man, it is. It's a good show. It's a good show. It's a good show. I'm sucked in. I'm knee deep in the drama and I'm dying to see what happens. I can't wait to see how he breaks my heart. You know what? The other thing I will say is, to me, what would have made the most sense was to have me filming with Heidi to have Heidi be my. My girl, you know, my sounding board. But instead it's Stacy the bartender and it's low, which is fine. You know, Again, genuinely liked both of them, but I didn't really know Stacy. I met Stacy at Heidi's wedding. I met her through the show. And while, yes, we of course developed a friendship, Heidi and I had real history together. I mean, Heidi was my girl. Like, Heidi and I were always really close and really good friends, but they couldn't do that because Heidi and Spencer were what they cut to when it wasn't our bullshit drama with boys or girls. Like, Heidi and Spencer were always, you know, the. The B story or the comedic relief or, you know, whatever you want to call it. And so they couldn't overlap those. Which I just thought was kind of a missed opportunity and kind of. I don't know. I think there would have been. I think Heidi and I would have had great scenes together just out of my own personal wants and needs. I think it would have been really fun to film with Heidi. Anyways, that was my takeaway. So as always, I have no idea what is to come. Like, 000. No clue. So we're gonna figure it out together, guys. Anyways, all right. Happy New Year and I hope you guys are off to a great start and I will see you next week. Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.