I Hashed It Out with Camille Grammer... + Advice with Lisa & Harry!

Summary

Podcast Title: Let's Not Talk About The Husband
Hosts: Lisa Rinna and Harry Hamlin
Episode Title: I Hashed It Out with Camille Grammer... + Advice with Lisa & Harry!
Release Date: May 16, 2025

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Introduction to the Episode

In this engaging episode of "Let’s Not Talk About The Husband", iconic Hollywood couple Lisa Rinna and Harry Hamlin delve into a mix of personal anecdotes, career insights, and heartfelt advice. Balancing Lisa’s vibrant personality with Harry’s calm demeanor, the duo offers listeners a candid look into their lives, both on and off the screen.

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Harry’s Business Pitch: Open Food Company

Timestamp: [00:40 – 03:01]

Harry introduces his latest venture, the Open Food Company, aiming to revolutionize the food industry with preservative-free, chemical-free products. He passionately describes their mission to provide consumers with healthy alternatives that are both delicious and convenient.

Harry Hamlin:
"We give you the recipe so you can cook the sauce you can buy in the jar at home if you want... Or you can buy it right out of the bottle."
[01:00]

Lisa humorously critiques Harry’s initial pitch, admitting she momentarily fell asleep, which sparks a playful exchange about improving sales techniques. Together, they refine the pitch to make it more compelling and appetizing.

Lisa Rinna:
"You gotta make it sound more delicious... So, I erected, I like that better."
[03:01]

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Lisa’s Experience at Elaine Goldsmith’s Book Party

Timestamp: [04:05 – 07:27]

Lisa shares her experience attending a book party for Elaine Goldsmith Thomas, author of "Climbing in Heels". She highlights Elaine’s impressive career, including her work with Julia Roberts and Jennifer Lopez, and expresses her excitement about the novel being optioned for a TV series.

Lisa Rinna:
"We made a great show. I don't think any of us were out there looking to ruin people's lives, but at times we did things that were really shitty."
[06:01]

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Confrontation and Reconciliation with Camille Grammer

Timestamp: [07:28 – 22:41]

A significant portion of the episode revolves around Lisa’s recent encounter with Camille Grammer at a reunion party. Reflecting on their tumultuous past on reality TV, Lisa recounts the awkwardness and eventual reconciliation with Camille.

Lisa Rinna:
"We were the collateral damage to this show, so we shouldn't have to carry that. We should be able to mend the fences..."
[13:05]

Harry supports Lisa’s perspective, emphasizing the importance of healing and letting go of past animosities.

Harry Hamlin:
"It's very odd that you did that... We all did our jobs."
[09:05]

Together, they discuss the emotional toll of reality TV and the necessity of moving forward without lingering resentment.

Lisa Rinna:
"Life is too short to have this be the final chapter for us because we have many more chapters..."
[21:13]

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Advice Segment: Answering Listener Questions

Timestamp: [25:07 – 45:00]

Transitioning from personal stories, Lisa and Harry engage with their audience by answering questions sourced from Instagram. They address a variety of topics, including relationships, marriage, career, confidence, and parenting. Here are some highlights:

1. Spouse Making Friends with the Opposite Sex
   Question: "How can I be okay with my spouse making new friends with the opposite sex at work, networking events?"
   Advice:
   Lisa Rinna: "Let them. You have to allow it."
   Harry Hamlin: "If you put too short of a leash on someone, they run for the hills."
   [26:15]

2. Husband Suggests Wife Get a "Boy Toy"
   Question: "My husband wants me to get a boy toy because he works and golfs. I'm into it, but how do I put myself out there?"
   Advice:
   Harry Hamlin: Humorous take suggesting she gets a sugar daddy for more stable relationships.
   Lisa Rinna: Playfully acknowledges the absurdity and offers light-hearted support.
   [28:57 – 30:44]

3. Ex Comes Out as Gay
   Question: "My ex of 10 years came out as gay. How do I deal? I'm feeling hurt, but I know it's not about me."
   Advice:
   Harry Hamlin: Encourages acceptance and moving on, highlighting that sexual orientation isn't influenced by others.
   Lisa Rinna: Suggests celebrating his honesty and embracing life.
   [31:13 – 33:21]

4. Dealing with a Narcissistic Friend
   Question: "How do you deal with a narcissistic friend?"
   Advice:
   Lisa Rinna: Emphasizes the difficulty of changing a narcissist and the importance of self-preservation.
   Harry Hamlin: Acknowledges the pervasive nature of narcissism and advises letting go.
   [33:21 – 35:15]

5. Single Woman Contemplating Solo Parenthood
   Question: "I'm a 39-year-old single woman contemplating having a baby on my own. Any advice?"
   Advice:
   Lisa Rinna: Enthusiastically encourages her to proceed if she's financially stable, sharing a heartwarming story from "60 Minutes."
   Harry Hamlin: Supports the idea, sharing his respect for single motherhood and personal anecdotes about his own children.
   [35:15 – 36:51]

---

Game Segment: Advice to Past Selves

Timestamp: [46:00 – 59:00]

To wrap up the advice segment, Lisa and Harry engage in a heartfelt game where they give advice to their younger selves based on photos from different points in their lives.

1. Harry’s Early Career Challenges
   Advice:
   Harry Hamlin:
   "You should pat yourself on the back. That was a big win for y'all. You did your job."
   [47:05 – 53:19]
   He recounts his experience being labeled "Sexiest Man Alive" unexpectedly, advising his younger self to embrace achievements despite challenges.

2. Lisa’s Emotional Moments on Screen
   Advice:
   Lisa Rinna:
   "Run, run, go. Never leave. Get off that couch and never come back."
   [53:42 – 56:06]
   Reflecting on a memorable tear-jerking scene, Lisa encourages her younger self to move forward and avoid dwelling on past pains.

3. Joint Advice for Their Younger Selves
   Advice:
   Harry Hamlin:
   "Find an investor."
   [57:03 – 57:22]
   Lisa Rinna:
   "Just keep going. Don’t listen to the haters. Just keep going."
   They humorously address their past appearances and career decisions, offering practical and motivational guidance.

---

Closing Remarks

Lisa and Harry conclude the episode by encouraging listeners to subscribe, leave reviews, and engage with them on social media. They emphasize their commitment to sharing unfiltered stories and providing genuine advice, reinforcing the heartfelt and humorous tone that defines their podcast.

Lisa Rinna:
"If you have a question for us or you need advice, God help you. Leave a voicemail using the link in our show notes."
[59:37]

Harry Hamlin:
"See you next week. Until then, let’s not talk about the husband."
[60:10]

---

Note: This summary excludes all advertisement segments as per the provided instructions.

Transcript

[Lisa Rinna]

The following podcast is a Dear Media Production. Hi, I'm Lisa Rinna.

[Harry Hamlin]

And I'm Harry Hamlin.

[Lisa Rinna]

And this is let's not Talk about the Husband.

[Harry Hamlin]

We've been together for over 30 years and we've been working in this industry a lot longer.

[Lisa Rinna]

Well, you know, we have some crazy stories to tell. And on this podcast, we're going to own it, baby.

[Harry Hamlin]

Buckle up. Let's get into today's episode. Hi, everybody. Thanks for coming back to let's not Talk about a Husband who happens to be sitting right here. Hi, Lisa.

[Lisa Rinna]

Sometimes you are so weird. These are the moments where I'm just like, oh, my God, he's so weird.

[Harry Hamlin]

I can't help it.

[Lisa Rinna]

I just don't get it.

[Harry Hamlin]

No, you inspire me.

[Lisa Rinna]

Thanks. How's your day?

[Harry Hamlin]

My day is going actually quite well. I'm in investor mode right now, trying to snag investors for this great company that Rene and I have started, the Open Food Company. We're on the cusp of changing the food business entirely because we're coming out with products that have no preservatives. Chemical free, actually. The ingredients you can find at your local store. We give you the recipe so you can cook the sauce you can buy in the jar at home if you want. You want to spend, you know, a couple of hours going to the store, getting the stuff, putting it together, cooking it and then serving it. Or you can buy it right out of the bottle. So. Yeah.

[Lisa Rinna]

Is that your selling? Is that how you sell?

[Harry Hamlin]

Does it? Well.

[Lisa Rinna]

Cause I went to sleep for a second and then I came back.

[Harry Hamlin]

You went to sleep while I was selling?

[Lisa Rinna]

While you were just doing that. Maybe we could work on your selling technique because I literally just fell asleep for a second and was like, wait, okay, I'm back.

[Harry Hamlin]

What would you do? How would you sell it?

[Lisa Rinna]

God, I think I would. You gotta make it sound more delicious, I think, because I literally just went to sleep while you were saying that so we could work on it.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, there are people out there in the world, by the way, who'd look at food labels and wanna make sure that they're not eating poison. And there's a lot of people. And by the way, that cohort of people is growing by the day.

[Lisa Rinna]

Okay. I'm starting to be more engaged and so starting to get excited about this.

[Harry Hamlin]

If you can create a product that tastes really, really, really, really, really good and at the same time doesn't have all that bullshit in it that you normally get, then you kind of got to win, right? Well, that's exactly what we're doing there.

[Lisa Rinna]

I'm awake now.

[Harry Hamlin]

Are you awake?

[Lisa Rinna]

Much better.

[Harry Hamlin]

Oh, good.

[Lisa Rinna]

Much better.

[Harry Hamlin]

So that's what we're. The company that we created is providing that kind of food so that we don't have, like, this continuing cycle of D diabetes and heart disease and hypertension and all the stuff that comes along with what people in America eat today. So corporations spend billions and billions and billions of dollars trying to figure out just the right crunchiness and just the right flavor for a little thing that big that you're going to put in your mouth and get addicted to. But it's filled with so many chemicals and such bullshit that you're addicted to poison. So what we're doing is creating a product that you can become addicted to, but it's not poison. There you go.

[Lisa Rinna]

I like that better.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah. Is that a good sales pitch?

[Lisa Rinna]

Much better.

[Harry Hamlin]

So I'm going out for investors right now. Yeah. And that's what we're doing. Okay, so anybody out there want to get into a food company just.

[Lisa Rinna]

And want to invest? There you go. Okay. I like that better. I needed to feel like I want to buy it. You need to feel like I have to have this. I need it. There's a empty place in the marketplace. You gotta fill it.

[Harry Hamlin]

That's what we're doing. We're filling that, and we're keeping people healthy at the same time.

[Lisa Rinna]

I like that.

[Harry Hamlin]

So what's going on with your day today?

[Lisa Rinna]

My days? I went to yoga. It was fabulous.

[Harry Hamlin]

Oh, I took the dog for a walk. She walked almost the entire way. A little puppy.

[Lisa Rinna]

We have little puppy, Cheetah Rivera, and.

[Harry Hamlin]

She'S really small, but I put her on the leash, and she walked almost the entire time today on her own.

[Lisa Rinna]

No.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah.

[Lisa Rinna]

She's a little tiny thing.

[Harry Hamlin]

I know, but she loves to go on that walk, and she loves to sniff everything and smell everything. And, you know, when the big, big, big dogs come along, I pick her up because, you know, she gets freaked out by big, big dogs. She's so small.

[Lisa Rinna]

Well, that is very exciting. I forgot to tell you this last week. I think this is interesting, and I've been marinating on it since last week.

[Harry Hamlin]

I like stuff that marinates. Usually tastes better that way.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah. I went to this book party for Elaine Goldsmith. She wrote a book called Climbing in Heels. Elaine Goldsmith Thomas, who used to be a very big agent, repped Julia Roberts for years, and now she's in business with J. Lo, and they do all these movies, and she produces all the movies and she's actually a really terrific writer, and she's written this book called Climbing in Heels, and Darren Starr has optioned it for a series.

[Harry Hamlin]

Is it like a novel? Let's say a story.

[Lisa Rinna]

It's a novel. Novel. It's a story. Oh.

[Harry Hamlin]

So it's not the story of her breaking the glass ceiling in business. It's a story about a person who.

[Lisa Rinna]

Has a little bit based, I think, on her life in the 80s. So it's like the business in the 80s.

[Harry Hamlin]

A lot of Coke in the 80s.

[Lisa Rinna]

I can't wait to read it. But she invited me to her book party last week. We became friends on Instagram. I know that you're not on social media, so you can't quite relate to it, but everybody else listening. The one thing I love about it.

[Harry Hamlin]

I know about Instagram. I know what Instagram is.

[Lisa Rinna]

You do know.

[Harry Hamlin]

But you're on it and stuff.

[Lisa Rinna]

You don't necessarily know that you can, like, DM and talk to people that you would never, ever talk to.

[Harry Hamlin]

I've heard the term DM before. I know that people have reached out to you with a DM and have gotten a hold of you that way. It's not anything that I do, but I know it works.

[Lisa Rinna]

So I think, going back to this, we met DMing each other. So she's a big Housewives fan, and she was really very supportive of me during my housewife run. And she would DM me and we would chat back and forth, and she was really cool. So I hadn't met her until last week. I only knew her on Instagram.

[Harry Hamlin]

Okay.

[Lisa Rinna]

So it was really fun to meet her.

[Harry Hamlin]

She invited you to her party based upon her knowing you on Instagram, but that's about it.

[Lisa Rinna]

And I was dying to read the book. I was wanting to read the book. And Darren Starr was the producer of Melrose Place.

[Harry Hamlin]

I remember absolutely.

[Lisa Rinna]

Darren Starr, for sure. The party was at Darren's house. Boy, Darren's done real well. Darren's done really well. Melrose Place, Emily in Paris have been very good.

[Harry Hamlin]

Oh, he's Emily in Paris, too.

[Lisa Rinna]

He's Emily in Paris.

[Harry Hamlin]

I haven't seen that, but it's one of your faves, right?

[Lisa Rinna]

Love it, love it, love it, love it. So he has this really cool room. It's in Bel Air, and it's a circular room with a bar. So it's a circle and so you can see all of downtown. And then as you walk in, his Emmy is like, right.

[Harry Hamlin]

He's only got one.

[Lisa Rinna]

I know. I thought he had more I would have thought he had more.

[Harry Hamlin]

Probably as a whole, like, he's got an Emmy in every room, right?

[Lisa Rinna]

He had just one. There was one Emmy in there. Anyways, beautiful room. Chocolate brown circular room. Anywho, so this party is, you know, there's lots of people there. I mean, JLo's hosting, dropping some names. J. Lo's there.

[Harry Hamlin]

Is that the first one today?

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah. Kris Jenner is there two. And then who else would, you know? Oh, all of a sudden I'm there talking to one of your old agents, Michael Black.

[Harry Hamlin]

Another name to drop.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah, and then Tony Howard was there. Tony Howard.

[Harry Hamlin]

I'd go way back.

[Lisa Rinna]

One of the biggest agents in the.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah. I'm so glad to hear she's still doing great.

[Lisa Rinna]

Oh, she looks great. She looks exactly the same. And then Wendy Goldberg.

[Harry Hamlin]

Fantastic. Yeah, I know them all. They're all from my era. That's right.

[Lisa Rinna]

Okay, so I'm talking to all these people, you know, that I met with you 30 years ago. And all of a sudden I turn around and I see Kyle Richards. Of course, you know, hi, Kyle. Fine. But then I turn again and guess who else is there? Camille Grammer.

[Harry Hamlin]

More castmates now.

[Lisa Rinna]

I haven't seen Camille Grammer in a very long time. Like, since the downfall. Like, the downfall of us. Like, Camille and I, you know, we didn't have a great time on the show. We had an issue here and there.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah, but you had. Most of the eight years you were on that show was not horrible.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yes, but you know when you have these moments on the show with people and then you haven't seen them and then all of a sudden you see them out. So I see her and I don't have any. Like, I'm to a point now after two and a half years where I'm like, free and clear. Right? So I see her and I'm like, oh, there's Camille. Not like, oh, there's Camille. It's like, oh, there's Camille. I go right over, I give her a hug, I start chatting to her with her. I see Kyle. I mean, Kyle's fine. That's not an issue. Say hi to Kyle. But what was interesting with Camille, Camille kind of looked at me like, I can't believe you're being nice to me. I said, camille, you know what? We gave them a really good show. We did our jobs. We did exactly what we were supposed to do. And you know what? Cheers to us. And I'm like, high fived her. And she looked at me like, you know what you're Right. We did do our jobs. We did.

[Harry Hamlin]

It's a TV show, and you guys just happened to be the cannon fodder. That's all. I mean, you know, you went in knowing what you were up to, going to be facing, and you faced it, and you did a great job, and the show was a hit. And, you know, at the end of the day, you came out with bandages and bruises all over you, but they've healed now.

[Lisa Rinna]

They have healed.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah. So you can go. Did you have a problem with her on the show?

[Lisa Rinna]

Oh, yeah.

[Harry Hamlin]

Oh, you did? I didn't know that.

[Lisa Rinna]

Oh, yeah.

[Harry Hamlin]

You and. You and Camille had an issue together.

[Lisa Rinna]

Oh, yeah.

[Harry Hamlin]

Oh, I did not know.

[Lisa Rinna]

Oh, yeah. Don't you remember that time she. Camille had some moments where she would go on Twitter and, you know, say nasty things about you or me, about me, about me, or about somebody, about anybody. So don't you remember that one time on the show where she shows up to a party and I. You don't remember, but you watched every single one of them, so you would remember.

[Harry Hamlin]

Joggle my mind.

[Lisa Rinna]

Okay, so we're at Kyle's party. Kyle's having a party. Eileen is there, because Eileen has come back for this party, okay. And all of a sudden, Camille's there, and I am confronted. And, you know, the producers want that confrontation. You know, they plan it between you and Camille. Of course. That's why they have Camille come, because they know what's going on. They know she's tweeting like a crazy woman.

[Harry Hamlin]

So then they can get some click bait out of this. They can get some bait on their hook from this.

[Lisa Rinna]

They know there's bait on their hook, and they know I'll bite.

[Harry Hamlin]

Okay.

[Lisa Rinna]

How about that?

[Harry Hamlin]

So you are willing to biter of bait.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yes. So I see her, of course, it's awkward. I forget she tweeted something nasty about me or whatever. So I go over, finally, I. I have to go over, because you have to. They're like, you have to go over there now. Whatever. So I go over, and I think what I said to her was, hi, how are you? You're an asshole on Twitter, and I don't like it. Or something to that effect.

[Harry Hamlin]

Oh, I remember this.

[Lisa Rinna]

Remember something like that. Hi, Camille, how you have been an asshole on Twitter. And this I remember. Whatever. So that's kind of like one of the last moments since I've seen Camille.

[Harry Hamlin]

Okay, so now I get it. I understand why there could be something thick between the two of you in this room last week.

[Lisa Rinna]

Okay, so what I'm saying, okay, what I'm trying to get to. And it's taking me way too long to get to this because, you know, even though I'm not in that universe anymore, I still see a lot of clips that come through. About the universe, right?

[Harry Hamlin]

Yes. The gift that keeps on giving, right?

[Lisa Rinna]

Yes, that keeps on giving. And, you know, different castmates are out there still stirring up stuff about, you know, people that aren't even on the show anymore, talking about this one and that one. Like, it. It's.

[Harry Hamlin]

Everybody's trying to maintain some kind of relevance out there. You don't have to do that because you have a whole new life.

[Lisa Rinna]

That's right. But everybody else, they're still doing it, buddy.

[Harry Hamlin]

I'm still here.

[Lisa Rinna]

So, you know what I would like to do? This is just an idea that I think would be really cool, and I don't know whether actual people would do it. I think it would be cool because I think if you got together now, I have a lot of them. I'd have to get a room full of people that I have pissed off royally. And most of them I've apologized to. And most of them have accepted the apology, but some of them haven't. Some of them said they have accepted it, but haven't.

[Harry Hamlin]

So what's your idea?

[Lisa Rinna]

You get everybody, all of us in a room together, and we basically, like.

[Harry Hamlin]

Just get have at each other.

[Lisa Rinna]

Well, not have at each other. Not like a reunion.

[Harry Hamlin]

Give everybody, like, spitballs and stuff.

[Lisa Rinna]

No, no, no. But, like, debrief it. Like what I said to Camille. Because basically, the truth is, we were the sacrificial lambs to this show, so we shouldn't have to carry that is what I'm saying. We should be able to mend the fences of the relationships and the people we've torn down in order to make this fucking TV show.

[Harry Hamlin]

It's a TV show. Just like if you were doing a drama, right, and you had a script where you yelled at somebody in the drama, at the end of the day, you hang up your wardrobe, you put your script into the shredder, and it's over.

[Lisa Rinna]

But you have a script. You're not following a script here. And so people take it personally. And you have to take it personally because it's fucking personal.

[Harry Hamlin]

So it's very odd that you did that.

[Lisa Rinna]

I know it is, but it's eight years of my life that is, like, there and sticky and prickly. Now. I would do it with everybody. I think all my enemies should.

[Harry Hamlin]

Do you want to film this reunion by the way, I don't know, put you all in a room and have at each other and film it, just to kind of clear the air, to get some closure of some kind.

[Lisa Rinna]

Well, I just think it'd be good for everybody whether you filmed it or not. I think that we carry so much of it and we don't need to. We could let it go and be like, you know what, you guys, we did what we were asked to do. We made a great show. I don't think any of us, you know, were out there looking to ruin people's lives, but at times we did things that were really shitty. And I. I would say that everybody did it. There's not one person on that show that can say, well, I never did that to anybody and I'm clean. No, we all did it.

[Harry Hamlin]

That was your job. Your job was to be shitty from time to time in order to get ratings so that they would keep hiring you because there would still be a show.

[Lisa Rinna]

But do you see what I'm saying?

[Harry Hamlin]

That's the idea.

[Lisa Rinna]

What I'm saying is we are the collateral damage to it.

[Harry Hamlin]

You know what you were like is Ourobros.

[Lisa Rinna]

What?

[Harry Hamlin]

What? Urobros.

[Lisa Rinna]

What's that?

[Harry Hamlin]

Urobros is a snake that eats its own tail. So you guys were like eating yourself in order to make that show.

[Lisa Rinna]

Well, it's true. And now that I've had two years away from it, I don't dislike these people. I don't dislike these women. I had to work with them in a way to make a television show that was prickly and was.

[Harry Hamlin]

You did your job.

[Lisa Rinna]

I did my job. We all did our jobs. Okay, this is exciting. I just received the Irestore for your hair. The point that I'm at in my life, I need more hair. Doesn't everybody need more hair? I think we all want more hair. So I got it. I'm gonna let you know more about it. The Irestore professional is clinically proven to help regrow hair using lasers and LEDs that send light therapy directly to your scalp. You can just pop it on while you're catching up on your favorite shows or cooking or relaxing or whatever. And the Mac's growth kit, it's like a full on hair squad that works from root to tip. It includes the advanced hair growth formula, thickening shampoo, thickening conditioner, and growth activator serum. And when you use all these with your Irestore professional, which you put on your head, you're setting yourself up for serious hair growth results. Trust me, your Hair will thank you and if you subscribe and save, you can save 25 or more plus free shipping. You know I love this product because it's so cool. It's lightweight, it's hands free and seriously, it's so easy to use. Give yourself the gift of hair confidence. This year for a limited time only, our listeners are getting a huge discount on Irestore Professional when you use code [e-mail] head over to irestore.com and use code Husband for our show's exclusive discounts on the Irestore Professional. Please support our show and tell them we sent you Hair loss is frustrating. You don't have to fight it alone. Thanks to Irestore, this episode of let's.

[Harry Hamlin]

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[Lisa Rinna]

I think it's just an honest. It's about an honest moment of what we did. And, you know, I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings, but it was part of the job.

[Harry Hamlin]

So will you feel better about yourself after having this reunion, after having this moment with these people? I mean, what's. What's it gonna do? Is it gonna do anything, or is it just a good time to see everybody again and have a good time?

[Lisa Rinna]

I just think it would be an interesting conversation to have with women that there's a few of them that I wouldn't even like. We ignore each other at parties. We ignore each other in.

[Harry Hamlin]

So you'd have Lisa Vanderpump there also at this thing. Cause I know that you sometimes are in the same hotel with Lisa Vanderpump, and you sort of don't acknowledge that you're.

[Lisa Rinna]

We don't acknowledge.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah, but that's really too bad. I'm very fond of the Vanderpumps and was very fond of them at the time.

[Lisa Rinna]

Well, that's what I'm saying. I'm not saying you want to heal. I don't want to be best friends with anybody. I don't need to hang out with anybody. I think that we all need to heal from the experience of what we did in that moment.

[Harry Hamlin]

So you're hoping to heal. You're hoping to have a moment so you can take a deep breath and say, okay, that's cleared out of my life, and I can move on without any of that bad juju sticking to me.

[Lisa Rinna]

It isn't even about me, exactly, to be honest with you, because I've done that work myself.

[Harry Hamlin]

Okay.

[Lisa Rinna]

It again, this came from the moment that I just had with Camille, and it was so natural for me to go over to her like there was no bad boogie. And I remember the look on her face like, I cannot believe that you're actually coming over to me, and it's going to be okay, and it's okay. That struck a chord in me that was like, you know, I think there's work to do there.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, I know you like to mend these kinds of fences.

[Lisa Rinna]

I do.

[Harry Hamlin]

Because I remember when you sent a big batch of flowers to one of those people who was on that sort of naughty list that had been there. And you can say who it was if you want. I'm not going to say who it is unless you want to. But I do know that you mended that fence, and that was a pretty damaged fence.

[Lisa Rinna]

That was a damaged fence. And again, that was Kathy. I think she Was Kathy Hilton. We've talked about it. She's talked about it. I did not wanna carry around that baggage because I'd known Kathy for 30 some odd years.

[Harry Hamlin]

Kathy, everywhere we go, everywhere. Yeah.

[Lisa Rinna]

And I said again to her, you know, life is too short to have this be the final chapter for us because we have many more chapters and I don't wanna have that. It's basically what I wanna do with everybody. I think I just would like to be clean about it.

[Harry Hamlin]

So it's. The life is too short part of it. It's like, why would we go through the rest of our lives having these negative, bitter feelings about each other when really all there is in the world is love. And that's true. There's nothing else in the universe but love. Everything else is a construct. Fear mainly is the thing that causes all the other bad boogie in the world. And so if you eliminate the fear, you take away all this stuff, what are you left with? There's only one thing and that's love. So I think what you're trying to do is, is engender love amongst these people. Is that right?

[Lisa Rinna]

Maybe. I mean, I just think that. And listen, it doesn't ever even have to happen. It's just a. It's a process in my mind where I have finally come to the realization that we were just doing our jobs, we were doing what was asked of us and the collateral damage is what is a shame because that shouldn't be left with us. Yeah, you know, just.

[Harry Hamlin]

That's all just stuff in your head, you know, and everybody creates these narratives going in there in your head. And it's all as. As Shakespeare said in Hamlet. No, there's nothing either good or bad, but thinking makes it so.

[Lisa Rinna]

Exactly.

[Harry Hamlin]

Meaning that, oh, that's all that stuff, the barbed wire that's in your head about that. If you could clear that out. Imagine, you know, it's like sunny days.

[Lisa Rinna]

That's what I mean. And I think also what triggered it as I heard, you know, Vanderpump was on something and oh, I know Andy on watch what happens live. And Andy said something to the effect of. Oh, Kyle mentioned that she looked at a house across the street from you.

[Harry Hamlin]

From who?

[Lisa Rinna]

From Vanderpump.

[Harry Hamlin]

Oh.

[Lisa Rinna]

And Lisa was like, well, I would move if she what? Moved across the street. Exactly. And I'm like, oh, please, you know What? She's a 65 year old woman, Kyle's a 55 year old woman. Whatever. Like, what? What are we doing?

[Harry Hamlin]

There goes the neighborhood. Yeah.

[Lisa Rinna]

She said, I would Move. I would absolutely move.

[Harry Hamlin]

Okay.

[Lisa Rinna]

And I don't think she was joking, actually, to be honest. So I was like, you know, it kind of gets to a point where you're like, all right, you know, it seems a bit ridiculous, us in this age of our lives.

[Harry Hamlin]

Seems.

[Lisa Rinna]

It is ridiculous being and behaving like that.

[Harry Hamlin]

It is ridiculous.

[Lisa Rinna]

Behaving like that.

[Harry Hamlin]

That seems is.

[Lisa Rinna]

It is. And guess what? It's gross. Yeah, it's actually gross.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, I mean, look, it's human behavior, as we have been taught. Human behavior. You know, we. We look around us and we watch movies about people seeking revenge and about people who. And we get in our minds all this stuff about, oh, if he treats me this way, I'm going to treat him that way. And it's all patterns that have been engendered by just old movies that running around in our head, when in actual fact, if you just look, look around at how beautiful the day is and how. How grateful we all are to be living at this particular time in the world when we can fly to Paris if we want to for dinner. I mean, if you have the wherewithal and the means to. Or you can turn the heat on when it's cold, or you can turn the air conditioning on when it's really hot and the food is available. I mean, we're not being chased by saber toothed tigers and stuff. Come on, we're living in an amazing time. Why fuck it up with all this weird barbed wire in our heads about people when we could just be having a great time? I'm just saying.

[Lisa Rinna]

Exactly. So really, it took me 20 minutes to say that, but that's basically my thought process was like, my God, we were just fucking so great at what we were doing. We were really good.

[Harry Hamlin]

You should pat yourself on the back. That was a big win for y' all. And that show that. That eight years that you were on was a big win for you. So, yeah, pat yourself on the back. There you go.

[Lisa Rinna]

All right. Well, since we're sort of taking advice and speaking about that sort of thing, we. We thought we would answer some questions from people that called in or wrote in from where? Questions from Instagram. I asked yesterday. We put something out saying, therapy with Lisa and Harry.

[Harry Hamlin]

What?

[Lisa Rinna]

Ask us for advice and we'll answer. Because people have been asking me about relationship advice. When I do my candy, I'm getting really nervous.

[Harry Hamlin]

Relationship advice? Yeah. We've been together for a while because.

[Lisa Rinna]

We'Ve been married for fucking ever and.

[Harry Hamlin]

We still like each other. But is there a Secret to that or did that just happen?

[Lisa Rinna]

I've decided it's luck.

[Harry Hamlin]

It's luck. It's luck.

[Lisa Rinna]

I think it's luck.

[Harry Hamlin]

So what can we offer? I mean, is there anything.

[Lisa Rinna]

Well, I don't know. That's why we're going to get some questions. Eve's going to read us some questions.

[Harry Hamlin]

Eve, here we go.

[Lisa Rinna]

And we're going to answer them.

[Eve]

Yes. So we have a bunch of questions from your audience. Mostly they wanted to know about marriage, relationships, but we also had some questions about career, confidence, parenting. So we're going to get into all of it.

[Lisa Rinna]

Right.

[Eve]

First question. How can I be okay with my spouse making new friends with the opposite sex at work, Networking events.

[Harry Hamlin]

Let them.

[Lisa Rinna]

Let them. That's right. That's right. You have to just allow it.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah. Because, you know, if you put too short of a leash on someone, they run for the hills. And, you know, we have to allow our spouses. Our spouse is plural of spouse. Spice, by any chance? It makes sense, right? We have to allow our spice, our spouses.

[Lisa Rinna]

I kind of feel like it's not.

[Harry Hamlin]

Spice to go wherever they want. I'm just gonna say and do whatever they want. Because if you. If you try to corral somebody and keep them in a little box, it's not gonna work. I can guarantee you that.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah, me too.

[Harry Hamlin]

So, you know, I mean, and if. What. What if they meet somebody at work that they fall in love with? I mean, what. What then?

[Lisa Rinna]

Well, then it probably wasn't meant to be for you, you know, I mean, you have to have faith. I think faith is a big one in relationships.

[Harry Hamlin]

I'll go with that. Faith.

[Lisa Rinna]

You have to have a lot of faith. And the. Once the jealousy comes in, you're fucked.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah. As long as you can keep trusting. And that's the thing. If you keep trusting, the trust will be. Will be welcome. Another trust will be. You can. You can count on the trust actually proving to be trustworthy. What am I trying to say?

[Lisa Rinna]

Oh, my God. Just really, I'm like, my head there's are spinning.

[Harry Hamlin]

If you give people trust, the more you trust, it's like, okay, the more love you give, the more love you get. Put it that way. So the more trust you give, the more trust you get.

[Lisa Rinna]

Let me just do a disclaimer. We are not experts and we have not trained for this.

[Harry Hamlin]

I don't know how to talk either.

[Lisa Rinna]

So just. Eve is having a very hard time talking today, so please take it with a grain of salt. We are not experts, though we have had A tremendous amount of therapy between the two of us.

[Harry Hamlin]

We have. And I'm going. I sent Eve long time ago, a lot of little aphorisms, little sayings that I always wanted to deconstruct. And you just said, take it with a grain of salt. Where the fuck does that come from? What does that mean? To take it with a grain of salt? And we'll get to that later. But that's just one of those things.

[Lisa Rinna]

It's one of them.

[Harry Hamlin]

Okay, okay.

[Lisa Rinna]

But you know what I meant.

[Harry Hamlin]

I know exactly what you meant.

[Lisa Rinna]

Don't shake the whole shaker on your meal. Just take it with the grain.

[Harry Hamlin]

With the grain. And if you spill salt, you're supposed to throw it over which shoulder?

[Lisa Rinna]

The left.

[Harry Hamlin]

Left shoulder or the right? I don't know. You never know. If you throw it over the wrong shoulder, you could be, like, in serious trouble. Right. Because you could go the opposite way. Like bad luck.

[Lisa Rinna]

No, no, no. Let's keep it positive.

[Harry Hamlin]

Okay? So whichever shoulder it is, either shoulder, throw that salt over your shoulder. Look, I don't know if we answered that question at all.

[Lisa Rinna]

Let's move on. We did enough.

[Eve]

Okay. We have another one related to marriage. This one's kind of spicy. So my husband wants me to get a boy toy because he works and golfs. I'm into it, but how do I put myself out there?

[Lisa Rinna]

So he wants you to get a boy toy.

[Harry Hamlin]

Wait a minute. Are we talking about something electronic?

[Lisa Rinna]

No.

[Harry Hamlin]

Or something that eats food?

[Lisa Rinna]

No, they're talking about like a boy. Like a. Like a boyfriend. While he's busy. He's busy?

[Harry Hamlin]

What is he playing golf?

[Lisa Rinna]

He's working. So get yourself a boy toy golf.

[Harry Hamlin]

And he can't be with her because he's on the golf course. And he says, while I'm on, like.

[Lisa Rinna]

Teeing off on go get yourself 16th.

[Harry Hamlin]

Hole, I want you to be having it off with somebody else, like the caddy or something.

[Lisa Rinna]

Sounds like he doesn't want to do it, so go get somebody else to do it. And she's asking where to meet them. Right.

[Eve]

Well, how does she put herself out there to find someone, first of all, like a website?

[Harry Hamlin]

I would call your divorce lawyer first and get that all straightened out. So let your guy play as much golf as he wants and get yourself unencumbered from the golf dude. And then am I. What's the wrong advice? That's a little too to say get a divorce.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah. How about.

[Harry Hamlin]

Wait a minute. She's. He's asking her to go out and find somebody else to have sex with while he's playing golf?

[Lisa Rinna]

Correct. So my answer is, go get yourself a sugar daddy. So forget the boy toy, because what, all you do is you just have sex with them. Get somebody who can really take care of you and who's hot and you can have sex with and who's rich.

[Harry Hamlin]

And who has a private jet and stuff like that and a big boat. But then wouldn't you want to be married to that person so that in case they croak, you could inherit all the money?

[Lisa Rinna]

Well, he doesn't have to be old. I'm sure there's some cute younger billionaires.

[Harry Hamlin]

Who would be willing to go out with a married woman. And what if the husband only decides to do nine holes and comes home after nine holes and they're doing it?

[Lisa Rinna]

Well, he said it was okay, so I don't know. I don't know.

[Harry Hamlin]

That's a tough one, actually. I'm a prude. And I also live a very sheltered life when it comes to stuff like this. So it's a little shocking to me that a man would, would ask his wife to do that. Does he, like, want to watch or something?

[Lisa Rinna]

Maybe we don't know the kinky steps that could be involved.

[Harry Hamlin]

I don't know either. But I, I, I just say I'm sorry. Yeah, I'm sorry that that's going on. If that's really going on, I'm sorry.

[Lisa Rinna]

All right, next question.

[Eve]

Okay.

[Lisa Rinna]

Oh, my God.

[Eve]

Okay, next one. My ex of 10 years came out as gay. How do I deal? I'm feeling hurt, but I know it's not about me.

[Lisa Rinna]

Well, first of all, my question is, did she have an inkling at all that he was gay when she was with him? You know what I'm saying? Like, you kind of always know.

[Harry Hamlin]

Have we known some people in our lives who, I mean, we have some family members who were married and had kids and then decided they were gay. Yeah, it seems to me. Did they, did anybody have any, did even you have any idea that this person was gay in your life when you did?

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah. Oh, yeah. You always have an inkling, I think when somebody is living not their truthful, full truth, I think you can always tell. And I would. My question would be back to her is, did you always have an idea? Did you have a feeling that he was gay?

[Harry Hamlin]

And then, okay, so then a lot of logistical stuff comes up. Once he's revealed the fact that he's gay, does he still want to stay married to her? And it sounds like maybe they're exes.

[Lisa Rinna]

Now exes, right?

[Eve]

Yeah, ex of 10 years. So I guess they dated 10 years ago and she just found out.

[Lisa Rinna]

Just found out that he was gay.

[Harry Hamlin]

So no harm, no foul. Yeah, right. I mean, whatever.

[Lisa Rinna]

Fine.

[Harry Hamlin]

Sounds to me like, yeah, she got out in time and he got out in time and everybody's living the life that they wanted to live. Unless there's some reason why they need to get back together or to work something out that wasn't worked out 10 years ago.

[Lisa Rinna]

No, I think she's probably a little freaked out. She's probably like, oh, wow, now he's gay. But my. I bet she knew. My question would be, did you know.

[Harry Hamlin]

If girls who find out that their boyfriends are gay think that maybe they drove them to be gay?

[Lisa Rinna]

Well, maybe it makes her feel badly about herself somehow, but.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, I doubt it. You can't drive a person to be gay by the way, you're born that way or you're not. So, yeah, it's.

[Lisa Rinna]

I just say go have a party and have a good time and enjoy your life because, you know, celebrate the fact he's gay. Fabulous.

[Harry Hamlin]

There you go.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah, that's my advice.

[Harry Hamlin]

Rainbow flag, like, yeah, something.

[Eve]

There you go. Okay, next one. Advice on how to deal with friendship breakups. How do you deal with a narcissistic friend?

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, okay, speaking as a narcissist myself. A narcissistic friend who breaks up and who wants to what, say that they are better than the person they broke up with?

[Lisa Rinna]

Well, no, a friend breakup can be just as upsetting and sad, I think, as a romantic breakup. No, you know, when you. With your friends, like, you love your friends and.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah.

[Lisa Rinna]

You have a falling out with your friends, it. It hurts.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah, I had a falling out with a bunch of my friends years and years ago, which was very, you know, they, they. I was going through a divorce issue and of course they had took sides and all of a sudden I was on the wrong side of the fence. And yeah, that was very painful for a while, but this is a different situation. How do you deal with a breakup of someone who's a narcissist?

[Lisa Rinna]

Well, you know, unfortunately, you're probably better off because you can't really change a narcissist. They are who they are and you will always be kind of a pawn in their game.

[Harry Hamlin]

I have a feeling. Yeah, I should bring the DSM5 with me the next time we have one of these.

[Lisa Rinna]

Next time we do our advice, I'll.

[Harry Hamlin]

Have the Diagnostic Statistical Manual and I can go to narcissism I can look at it and I. And go, okay, so how do we deal with that kind of a situation? But it's a sticky wicket. I mean, narcissism is so pervasive in the world right now and we're surrounded by it in politics, we're surrounded by it, we're surrounded by it in the entertainment industry. And it shows its head quite often.

[Lisa Rinna]

In fact, I think you're lucking out, actually. I think you're dodging a bullet. There's another one of those phrase things.

[Harry Hamlin]

But I know what dodging a bullet means. That means you dodged a bullet.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah. And you didn't die. That's right.

[Harry Hamlin]

Okay, so yeah, you dodged a bullet.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah. Okay, next.

[Eve]

Okay, next question. I'm a 39 year old single woman contemplating having a baby on my own. Any advice?

[Lisa Rinna]

I love that. Personally, I think, yes, do it if you can afford to do it. I was watching 60 Minutes last night and they had that very long story on freezing eggs. And there was one woman that stood out to me. I think she was a 39 year old woman and she chose to go ahead and have a baby by herself. She'd frozen her eggs and she got a donor and she had this really cute baby boy. And then she had another one too. Not a year later. Not even a year later, she had his brother.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah.

[Lisa Rinna]

And it was just such a heartwarming story. I say, do it, do it, do it.

[Harry Hamlin]

And it kind of looked like from the picture, it looked like maybe the donor was the same.

[Lisa Rinna]

It was the same donor. Because they're brothers.

[Harry Hamlin]

They're brothers.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yes.

[Harry Hamlin]

Okay. Wow, that's amazing. So, and my son was born when his mother was 44 and that was, you know, she had a pregnancy without complications. She did have a C section at the end of the day.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah. But still, it's kind of a miracle at that point.

[Harry Hamlin]

That was, that was she. She decided to have a C section. She didn't need to have a C section, but she had an aversion to pain. So, you know, the C section was an easier way to go. But yeah, so she was 44. I would say, you know, you still can do it. And if you want to do it and that clock ticks and motherhood is beckoning, go ahead and do it because we have kids. I have three, we have two together. And it's the most amazing thing, the greatest thing ever in your life.

[Lisa Rinna]

So, yes, I would not want to miss it if I were you. If you have a chance not to.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah, go ahead, do it.

[Eve]

I love that.

[Harry Hamlin]

Lately I've been trying to clean up the way I shop for groceries. Not just for my health, but for my budget too. I was tired of standing in the aisles trying to read every ingredient label only to end up overpaying for a few healthy items in my local store. That's when I gave Thrive Market a shot and honestly, it's been a total game changer. I'm getting the same high quality brands I love, but for less and without compromising my standards. Thrive Market is like your favorite health food store, but online and way more affordable. I'm talking about premium brands like Primal Kitchen, Siete Hu, Simple Meals, all delivered to your door and up to 30% less than you'd pay at a traditional store. Everything they sell is non GMO and meets incredibly high standards. They actually ban over 1000 ingredients that are still allowed in US products. Things like artificial dyes, preservatives and seed oils. The site is super easy to shop. You can filter by diet like gluten free paleo, keto, low sugar, vegan so you're not wasting time reading every label. I've personally been avoiding seed oils lately and Thrive makes it simple to find clean options, all vetted and all way more affordable than I expected. I use Thrive Market because it's easy and I can find all the things my family needs in one place. Skip the junk without overspending. Head over to thrivemarket.com husband to get 30% off your first order and a free $60 gift. That's thrivemarket.com husband thrivemarket.com husband join us.

[Eve]

On May 17th in Los Angeles for the Dear Media Edit, a Live Wellness Experience. A day of curated conversations and immersive experiences with your favorite Dear Media hosts and leading voices in health and wellness. Explore what it means to truly feel good inside and out. Tickets are on sale [e-mail] events. Next one I've been with my boyfriend for two years and I think it's time for me to move in, but I'm scared. Any advice?

[Harry Hamlin]

Okay, so two years. That's a very important time. I've been with my boyfriend for two years. So the normal time that a relationship lasts, that is a relationship based on infatuation is 18 years.

[Lisa Rinna]

18 months.

[Harry Hamlin]

18 months to two years.

[Lisa Rinna]

18 months to two years.

[Harry Hamlin]

So it's that 18 month to two year period. If you've made it past 18 months and you still feel like moving in, then I think you might be kind of out of the weeds, you know, because you know, we do know that infatuation creates the sensation that you're falling in love, that it's a passive thing where all of a sudden everything in life looks beautiful. Even like things that normally smell don't smell anymore. Things that normally look like horrible don't look horrible anymore. And telephone poles look like beautiful works of art. I mean, it's one of those weird things that happens to the human psyche when you fall in love with. Suddenly you're bathed in this golden, beautiful sensation of everything being great. That's infatuation. And that lasts for about 18 months. And then comes the real work, which is, how do I maintain this and actually create a love which has to be created. It doesn't happen on its own. So take it away.

[Lisa Rinna]

Well, I think that you just said it. Why not give it a shot? You can. She can move in if she wants.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah, I mean, our kids, they, they. They moved in together and they're still together. And they've lasted longer than two years.

[Lisa Rinna]

I think it's been two years.

[Harry Hamlin]

And yeah, in that case it's working out. But, you know, it's not easy.

[Lisa Rinna]

It's not easy, though, to live with somebody because, you know, you're in each other's space. You have to find ways to, you know, keep your space private. If you need private space and come together. I mean, it's a dance.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, we moved in together, you know, kind of out of necessity. You had a dog, a little dog that was run over by my assistant. Took the dog out to Malibu one day, dog ran across pch and that was it. And so you were traumatized and you came over to my house and we spent the night together. It was Valentine's Day, was it not?

[Lisa Rinna]

Night before in.

[Harry Hamlin]

In 13, 1993, Valentine's Day. And you decided to move in. Sort of. It wasn't really a decision.

[Lisa Rinna]

I just never left.

[Harry Hamlin]

Never left?

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah. I didn't move in. I just didn't leave.

[Harry Hamlin]

But let's think about what it was like when you first. We first were living together. Trying to figure that out. Trying to figure out.

[Lisa Rinna]

I don't remember, you know, who uses.

[Harry Hamlin]

Room when, you know.

[Lisa Rinna]

Long ago. Harry.

[Harry Hamlin]

It was a long time ago.

[Lisa Rinna]

Don't even remember.

[Harry Hamlin]

We ended up having. Going to therapy pretty quick. Right. Because we had some issues pretty quick. And I think those issues were all about how to manage living together under the same roof for the first time.

[Lisa Rinna]

I don't think they were. Tell me, what do you think they were about? You were coming out of a very difficult relationship and it was much more about communication in those. It Wasn't about living.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah. Okay. So we were fine living together, I guess.

[Lisa Rinna]

I guess so. I don't remember.

[Harry Hamlin]

The thing about it. Living together, and I think about any relationship is what we did is we took it moment to moment. We didn't have any expectations at the beginning about how this was going to go, whether we were going to make it or not. We just. We really were very focused on being from one moment to the next.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah, because you really didn't want to be in another marriage.

[Harry Hamlin]

No, I.

[Lisa Rinna]

You really didn't.

[Harry Hamlin]

Didn't. Been down that rabbit hole twice, and I didn't like it. Yeah, No. I got burned both times. And I was like, yeah, so one.

[Lisa Rinna]

Day at a time.

[Harry Hamlin]

I want myself to be burned. And. Yeah, so one day at a time. One day at a time.

[Lisa Rinna]

That has a lot to do with why I think we've survived because we didn't have huge expectations, because there were none. Like, you were. You were. You were like, girl, you're lucky to even be here because I don't even want to be in a relationship. And I was like, okay, yeah, I am lucky to be here, but so are you.

[Harry Hamlin]

And so I was so lucky. I'm the lucky one in that you helped me through that very, very difficult time in my life when my ego had been severely trounced by my wife running off with a pop star. And my ego went, what. What the. What? What's wrong with me? What's wrong with me? And it was all just, you know, having to come to terms with that. That ego in there going, okay.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah. But again, we always have to say, thank you, Michael Bolton.

[Harry Hamlin]

That's true.

[Lisa Rinna]

Thank you, Michael Bolton.

[Harry Hamlin]

More flowers for Michael. Anyway, so I would say go for it. Go moment to moment.

[Lisa Rinna]

No expectations today.

[Harry Hamlin]

No expectations. And you'll be okay.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah. All right, next.

[Eve]

Okay, next question. How do you know when it's time to leave a situationship?

[Lisa Rinna]

A situationship like a friendship, a relationship, a job, even. That's a tough one.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, I mean, if you're unhappy, I mean, if you're.

[Lisa Rinna]

I think, you know, I think you have to go with your gut. I think we stop ourselves for so many reasons.

[Harry Hamlin]

Convenience.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah.

[Harry Hamlin]

Nobody wants to step out of the lane that they're used to. Nobody wants to go, wait a minute, it's going to be cold out there. I'm going to be alone. I'm not going to be sleeping with somebody next to me in bed. Or I've got this job. I'm getting a paycheck every week. What if I Leave the job. All of a sudden I'm in the unknown. And the thing about the unknown is that the unknown carries all this mystery and wonder and you just never know. There's a great book that Alan Watts wrote called Living no. Something about the uncertainty. Oh, my God, I can't forget. I can't. The Wisdom of Insecurity. It's called the Wisdom of Insecurity. And it's all about stepping out into the unknown and taking control of your life by allowing.

[Lisa Rinna]

I like to do that. I do have a tendency to do it, probably more than most when I know something's ready to be done. I'm pretty good at, like, you know what? We change this up.

[Harry Hamlin]

Gotta change up. You are much better at change up. I'm. I am someone who likes. Okay, I'd like the status quo because it's comfortable.

[Lisa Rinna]

It's comfortable. Even if it feels bad. Feeling bad. We're very used to. If you grow up in a up, you know, childhood, like we all basically did, in many ways, uncomfortability, you're like, oh, that feels good. Oh, pain. Oh, good.

[Harry Hamlin]

You're used to it and you stick with it. And people oftentimes in relationships, they'll go for the person who is the most familiar, who happens to be maybe a.

[Lisa Rinna]

Parental type figure, just like their father or their mother.

[Harry Hamlin]

Exactly. Who was like, terrorizing to them. But they'll go to that because they're familiar with.

[Lisa Rinna]

We all do that.

[Harry Hamlin]

And maybe the same thing is happening in this case with this person who's not. Who's in a situationship, which. A word I've never heard before.

[Lisa Rinna]

I like that word. I know I had neither.

[Harry Hamlin]

So if you're in a situationship that feels really bad and you want to know what. How to deal with that, you know, the thing you want to do is you only hear once you're on this planet one time. For those of us who don't necessarily believe we're coming back as snails or shrews or something in the next life. Here, one time. It should be fun, should be enjoyable. And have a good time. Do everything you can to make that happen.

[Lisa Rinna]

Good advice, Harry.

[Harry Hamlin]

There you go. And by the way, not an expert. I'm just a human trying to improvise here. Okay.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah.

[Eve]

All right. Well, I think that is a great note to end on. But before we wrap up, I want to do a little game with you guys.

[Lisa Rinna]

All right?

[Harry Hamlin]

Oh, a game.

[Eve]

So this game is a new one. It's on the theme of advice. I thought it would be fun since we just gave a bunch of advice to your listeners, if you give a little bit of advice to your past selves. Yes. So I am going to show on this TV screen here different images from different points in your lives. And I want you guys, in like, one sentence to give yourself a word of advice.

[Lisa Rinna]

Kind of like RuPaul's Drag Race, when they show the little pictures of the. When they're little baby boys and you know, what advice would you give to that little guy?

[Harry Hamlin]

This is something I've never seen before.

[Lisa Rinna]

I get it. Yeah. They talk to themselves as, like, four year olds and they're, like, all dressed up in their drag, and it's very emotional.

[Harry Hamlin]

Amelia won her Model of the Year award and she said, how would she say it? I have to thank my younger self.

[Lisa Rinna]

And I dedicate this.

[Harry Hamlin]

I dedicate this to my younger self for sticking through it and following my dream, which she made. Oh, my goodness, it makes me cry every time I think about that. Go ahead, Eve.

[Eve]

Okay, so here is the first picture, and this one is for Harry.

[Harry Hamlin]

Oh, boy, Here we go.

[Lisa Rinna]

Aww.

[Harry Hamlin]

Okay, that's solid days. That goes way back.

[Lisa Rinna]

And so in a sentence, say, what about yourself?

[Eve]

A piece of advice you would give to yourself in this moment.

[Harry Hamlin]

Oh, about that. Let's see. Well, I think the night before I took that picture, I went to a party and I had too much red wine. I would have much less red wine before a photo shoot like that.

[Lisa Rinna]

That's a good answer. I like it. Okay.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah, yeah.

[Lisa Rinna]

You don't look like you had a lot of red wine.

[Harry Hamlin]

So that's because I was young. But, yeah, I'll never forget. I was like, what did I do last night? I've got this photo shoot for this magazine today, and I didn't want to do that. I had said to the people at LA Law I wasn't going to do any press for the first year. And I didn't do any press at all for the first year. Until finally, just at the very end of the season, they came to me and begged me to do US Magazine and People magazine. And I said no at first. And then they said, please, please, please, please. And so I said, okay, but I just want to talk about the shows. I had no idea that they were going to make this the COVID It was supposed to be a cover about LA Law and the show. And then I was in Australia doing a promotional tour for LA Law and I looked up and I saw this in a shop window in Australia and I freaked out. I said, oh, my God, they made me the sexiest man alive. I had no idea because that was only the third iteration of it. There had been two more before me, but nobody knew it was going to be an annual thing at that point. And it was like, oh, no. So I was mortified when that came out. And then to add insult to injury, US magazine and People magazine weren't talking that year, I guess. And my picture came. The COVID came out on us the same week that this came out. So I was on the COVID of both magazines in the same week.

[Lisa Rinna]

Such problems to have.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, good news is that I was not in the United States for the entire time that those magazines were on the stands. I was traveling around doing a promotional tour all through Australia and Europe during that. So when I got back to the U.S. it was gone. So you have to deal with it.

[Lisa Rinna]

See, you get a lot of tidbits on this podcast, whether you think you do or not. There's a lot of tidbits that I didn't know about, which is miraculous. The world doesn't know about. I think it's special. We come out with things that we never have talked about.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, no, anyway, there's that. Anyway, I don't need to see it anymore.

[Eve]

Okay, next one. Okay, I'll give Lisa one.

[Lisa Rinna]

Oh, Billy.

[Harry Hamlin]

Is that Billy?

[Lisa Rinna]

That's Billy, but that's Billy. Like coming back around Billy. What advice?

[Harry Hamlin]

Whoever did your makeup did a really good job there.

[Lisa Rinna]

I think that was Adam. Christopher.

[Harry Hamlin]

So it was before Adam got heavy with the eyes.

[Lisa Rinna]

Cause your eyes, they're heavy. Yeah, that's Adam. What advice would I give to her? Just keep going. Just keep doing your thing. Don't listen to the haters. Just keep going.

[Harry Hamlin]

And you did keep going. And here you are. Yeah, you know, well done.

[Eve]

Love it.

[Harry Hamlin]

Good job.

[Eve]

Okay, next one. This one's for Harry.

[Harry Hamlin]

This is all what advice?

[Eve]

Yeah, what advice would you give?

[Harry Hamlin]

To myself.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yes, right there.

[Harry Hamlin]

Okay. So I'm really happy I did that movie. That movie destroyed my film career. But I'm really, really proud of having done it, I think. Yeah. I mean, I might even still have that shirt. I don't know.

[Lisa Rinna]

You probably do. I would say with the way that you go about cleaning out a closet, I'm gonna say, I could probably go in there and find that shirt.

[Harry Hamlin]

I was probably still on that shirt. Anyway, that was Making love. That was 1981. Michael on Kean and I in the very first ever studio backed gay love story between me and Michael Ankine. And we have a scene in there, a Famous scene in there where I kiss Michael, and Michael kisses me, I guess. And it's the first time men had ever kissed on screen in any kind of a studio situation. It was 20th Century Fox, and all the brass came over to watch the thing that had never happened before on film, which was the kiss between two men. And I had said to Michael, please, Michael, listen, before we do this kiss, let's do it. Let's have this kiss be very, very romantic, very tender. Let's have our lips barely touch each other, no tongues, and we'll just kind of fall into each other's eyes rather than each other's mouths. And he goes, oh, that's great. That sounds like a wonderful idea. So they turn the camera over, it rolls. They say, rolling. Action. I walk into the scene, Michael grabs me by the back of the head, comes down, plants his mouth on mine, and his tongue starts tingling with my uvula. I mean, his tongue goes right down the back of my throat. And I'm sitting there, the camera's rolling. I'm saying to myself, whatever you do, Harry, don't flinch, because you don't want to have to do this again. So we ended up having to do take, too. But after the first take, after he put his tongue down my mouth, I. You know, I. I kept it together. And we put our arms around each other, and we walked off camera into this bedroom, at which point I heard them say, cut. And I just got. I said, oh, my God. I said, no tongues. And. And the director and the producer, Sherry Lansing from the studio, ran the studio at the time. Dan Melnick, the executive, they were on the floor laughing when I came out from the bedroom. But then we had to do it again. So it's the second take that made it onto the film.

[Lisa Rinna]

But you're not answering the question.

[Harry Hamlin]

What. What advice would I give myself? Yes, you made the right choice. Even though it destroyed your career, you made the right choice. Okay.

[Eve]

I love it. Okay.

[Lisa Rinna]

Hilarious.

[Eve]

Okay, next we have one for Lisa. What advice would you give yourself?

[Lisa Rinna]

Run, run, go. Never leave. Get off that couch and never come back.

[Eve]

Okay, for the people listening, can you describe what this image is?

[Lisa Rinna]

So this is a picture of me sitting at the reunion. I've got the bunny on my lap in the cellophane after Kim has given me back the bunny.

[Harry Hamlin]

One tear has fallen down your face and I'm.

[Lisa Rinna]

I'm.

[Harry Hamlin]

I guess the one tear has fallen.

[Lisa Rinna]

Down your face drying up the one tear.

[Harry Hamlin]

That's right.

[Lisa Rinna]

Erica's looking at Kim like, I can't fucking Believe you just did that. And, you know, if I'd been smarter and the advice I'd give to myself is, you don't need to go back to that. Just keep walking.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, that was the tear that launched a thousand memes. I have to say. That tear that you're dousing off there in that picture is iconic, you know.

[Lisa Rinna]

And it's funny because I've heard over the years, so many people say, oh, she's a soap opera actress. She knew exactly how to, like, you know, cry that tear. Here's the thing you don't know. I've always, as an actor, had a harder than most time crying. Like, I can't do that. When I was doing Days of Our Lives with Deidre Hall. Deidre hall can cry out of. If you say, I need a tear out of your left eye, she can do it. I need a tear out of your right eye, she can do it. I cannot do that. So when we watch that scene, what another thing that's so miraculous is that that even happened because I don't have that good of a handle on my tears when I.

[Harry Hamlin]

Your tear duct. You don't have tear duct control.

[Lisa Rinna]

No. So that was very real. And I can now, you know, I have a one tier moment.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, that one tier, like I said, was the tier that launched a thousand memes. And it was completely perfect and absolutely spontaneous, I must say.

[Lisa Rinna]

And getting that bunny, I mean, you know, when you really go back and look at it, you know, that bunny was just up at that pharmacy.

[Harry Hamlin]

You asked me, you said to me, you said, you know, Kim's having a grandchild. Should I get them a present? And I said, of course. And you went and got the bunny, which she never unwrapped.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah, I mean, just the whole thing. Bunny, it's blue. She was having a. They were having a boy. They wrapped it in that cellophane. I mean, you could not have written that scene better.

[Harry Hamlin]

And where does that bunny live now? In the clubhouse in Andy Cohen's clubhouse. Bunny lives there?

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah.

[Harry Hamlin]

Okay.

[Eve]

All right.

[Lisa Rinna]

Run, girl, run.

[Eve]

Run, girl, run, run. Okay, here's another one. This one's for both of you.

[Lisa Rinna]

Oh, Belle Gray. Oh, my God.

[Harry Hamlin]

Look at you. Look at how perky you look. Look at.

[Lisa Rinna]

Delilah's got.

[Harry Hamlin]

Delilah's got that look on her face.

[Lisa Rinna]

Delilah Syke.

[Harry Hamlin]

What the. The fuck is this going.

[Lisa Rinna]

What are you doing? Why am I with these people who put me here? Amelia's like, I love this. I'm gonna be more famous than everybody in this picture. I'm gonna show all of them, I am gonna make more money. And everybody else, I'm gonna leave them in the dust. And Delilah's like, fuck this. Get me out of here.

[Harry Hamlin]

Look at how cute you look in your Belgrade tank top.

[Lisa Rinna]

I'm happy. You look happy. We look happy.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, we just were opening that store, right? And it was a big hit. It.

[Lisa Rinna]

What advice would we give them at this moment?

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah, find an investor.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah. You know what? Find a backer right away. That's right. That is right. Find somebody with a lot of money to back you, because very soon, 2008 is coming very soon, you're going to be, you know what? Under. In the red.

[Eve]

I love it. Very practical advice. We love that here. Okay, last one.

[Lisa Rinna]

Oh, this is a fun game. I like it. Good.

[Eve]

Okay, here's the last one for you, Lisa.

[Lisa Rinna]

Oh, my God. With my dad. Picking cotton.

[Harry Hamlin]

Picking cotton.

[Lisa Rinna]

It's somewhere off of the freeway in Bakersfield. I want to say. Oh, there. See, this is like a little RuPaul's Drag Race moment where you look at your little self and you talk to her and you say, you know what? Everything's going to be okay. Your hair's gonna get better. Your hair will get better than that. Look. I still dress like that, so.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yes, you do.

[Lisa Rinna]

I'm still that.

[Harry Hamlin]

So you were driving along, and you looked out and you saw a field, and you said, daddy, what's that? And he said, oh, I think that's cotton. And you said, cotton? Is that where cotton comes from?

[Lisa Rinna]

When have you seen cotton? On the side of the road.

[Harry Hamlin]

He said, let's stop and let me show it to you.

[Lisa Rinna]

I guess we got out and we picked some cotton and felt it. Cause at that point, I'm about to about five.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah, you're pretty young, man. You're still cute.

[Lisa Rinna]

He probably wanted to have me feel the cotton. I don't really remember you.

[Harry Hamlin]

You looked cuter as you got older.

[Lisa Rinna]

I have to say. I know I was. Thanks. It's true. I'm kind of like fine wine. I've had some really tough moments. That was not my cutest, but it.

[Harry Hamlin]

Looks like you're sporting a paunch there, too. What's going on?

[Lisa Rinna]

I think it's just my shirt. I still have that same body, by the way. I still have the same body. It hasn't really changed. And I would just say to her, everything's gonna be O. You're gonna have a crazy life. You're gonna go through many different iterations, I would say, but you're gonna land on your feet and everything's gonna be fine. And you're gonna become a little fashionista.

[Harry Hamlin]

There you go. Yeah, you're gonna have a couple really famous kids.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah. Look at my dad's mustache. Hilarious.

[Harry Hamlin]

I love your dad.

[Lisa Rinna]

Aw.

[Eve]

I love it.

[Harry Hamlin]

There you go. Yeah, how about that?

[Eve]

That's that on that.

[Harry Hamlin]

That was that. So, hey, everybody, thanks for checking in and seeing us do let's not talk about the husband.

[Lisa Rinna]

Thanks for listening to our show. You can catch new episodes every Friday.

[Harry Hamlin]

And don't forget to subscribe so you don't miss anything.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah, and if you liked what you.

[Harry Hamlin]

Heard, consider leaving us a rating or review. And make sure to tell all your friends, too. I mean, like, everyone you know and their mother.

[Lisa Rinna]

If you have a question for us or you need advice, God help you. Leave a voicemail using the link in our show notes. We might just answer your question in a future episode. Now you can find us on social media, Lisarina on Instagram, and then I'm sirenaofficial on TikTok.

[Harry Hamlin]

And I'm harryrhamlin on Instagram.

[Lisa Rinna]

That's right.

[Harry Hamlin]

So see you next week.

[Lisa Rinna]

Until then, let's not talk talk about the husband. Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.