The Story of Harry Hamlin

Summary

Podcast Summary: "The Story of Harry Hamlin" – Let's Not Talk About The Husband

Podcast Information:

• Title: Let's Not Talk About The Husband
• Hosts: Lisa Rinna and Harry Hamlin
• Release Date: April 25, 2025
• Episode Title: The Story of Harry Hamlin

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1. Introduction

In this emotionally charged episode of Let's Not Talk About The Husband, Harry Hamlin opens up about his personal history, delving deep into his family's intricate dynamics, his father's remarkable achievements, and the challenges he faced growing up. Hosted alongside his wife, Lisa Rinna, the episode balances heartfelt storytelling with moments of levity, offering listeners an intimate glimpse into Harry's life beyond the Hollywood facade.

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2. Harry Hamlin's Family Background and Father's Rocket Science

Harry begins by recounting his father's illustrious career as a rocket scientist. His father’s expertise led to the development of the Saturn V rocket, a monumental achievement in space exploration.

• Harry Hamlin [04:15]: "This was the Saturn V rocket, my daddy's rocket... These engines on the bottom, they're called the F1 engines. They evolved out of an engine that my dad worked on when he was at NASA."

He contrasts his father's work with modern space tourism ventures, highlighting the vast differences in purpose and technology.

• Harry Hamlin [05:07]: "The Saturn V rocket is one. Up until now, it's the biggest rocket that was ever built."

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3. Family Dysfunction and Substance Abuse

Despite his father's professional success, Harry's family life was plagued by dysfunction and substance abuse. Both of his brothers succumbed to alcoholism and smoking, leading to their premature deaths.

• Harry Hamlin [03:10]: "I'm the last man standing in my family. Both of my brothers checked out. They had a lifestyle that was not too conducive to long life..."

He poignantly shares the impact of these losses on his upbringing and mental health.

• Harry Hamlin [17:10]: "They had many cocktails at night... I would crawl up into my bed and hear them screaming at each other all night long."

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4. Harry's Personal Struggles and Turning Point

Harry reflects on his own challenges, including poor academic performance and behavioral issues during his youth. A pivotal moment occurred at a summer camp where a counselor's intervention redirected his path.

• Harry Hamlin [24:18]: "He grabbed me by the neck, took me behind the tent, and beat the shit out of me... he saved my life."

This experience, combined with his pursuit of a psychology degree, enabled Harry to understand and navigate his tumultuous family environment better than his siblings.

• Harry Hamlin [27:05]: "Studying psychology probably helped me to understand the human condition a little bit better than my brothers did."

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5. Meeting Lisa Rinna and Building Their Relationship

Harry credits Lisa for being the cornerstone of his transformation. Their meeting and subsequent marriage provided him with the stability and support he desperately needed.

• Harry Hamlin [28:53]: "Meeting you was the whole thing. You saved my life."

Their partnership is portrayed as a beacon of hope and resilience amidst personal and familial adversities.

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6. Insights on Parenting and Raising Kids

The couple discusses their approaches to parenting, influenced by their own challenging upbringings. They emphasize the importance of open communication and emotional support, something they found lacking in their own families.

• Harry Hamlin [27:44]: "I did interventions on both of them. You know, alcoholic interventions."

They reflect on their children's upbringing, striving to break the cycle of dysfunction and provide a nurturing environment.

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7. Anecdotes and Personal Stories

Throughout the episode, Harry shares various personal anecdotes that shed light on his character and life experiences. Notably, he recounts the story of his mother’s remains and the emotional journey he undertook to lay her to rest with dignity.

• Harry Hamlin [40:21]: "I transferred her from the Penny's bag into a Tommy Hilfiger bag. Because of the red, white, and blue colors. I thought maybe she would feel more comfortable."

These stories not only highlight his resilience but also his deep-seated need for closure and understanding of his past.

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8. Conclusion

In closing, Harry and Lisa reflect on the significance of sharing their stories through the podcast. They acknowledge the therapeutic aspect of their conversations and the importance of vulnerability in strengthening their bond.

• Lisa Rinna [50:36]: "Wow, what a podcast today. It's like therapy almost, isn't it?"
• Harry Hamlin [50:45]: "I guess so. I mean, we're getting to know each other after 30 years, some odd years."

The episode serves as a testament to their enduring relationship, resilience in the face of adversity, and the healing power of shared narratives.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps:

• Harry Hamlin [04:40]: "He was tapped by the government because his arm was cut off during the Second World War. He was 4F, couldn't go to the war, so he went to work for Bell Labs..."

• Harry Hamlin [12:27]: "He ended up building the fastest boat in the world. He won the world speed record in 1939 for going like 89 point something miles per hour."

• Harry Hamlin [17:10]: "As soon as he got out, he went to a bar, you know, that kind of thing."

• Harry Hamlin [24:03]: "He saved my life. Seriously, wherever you are, I hope you find me, because that guy straightened me out."

• Harry Hamlin [30:43]: "Feelings and emotions are the most critical things that we have in our lives. They're our guideposts."

• Harry Hamlin [40:51]: "And then I bought a little tape recorder with that. I drove her all the way up to Twin Falls..."

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Final Thoughts

This episode of Let's Not Talk About The Husband offers a profound exploration of Harry Hamlin's life, marked by triumphs, traumas, and transformation. Through candid conversations, Harry and Lisa provide listeners with a raw and authentic portrayal of navigating personal hardships, the complexities of family relationships, and the enduring strength of love and partnership.

Transcript

[Lisa Rinna]

The following podcast is a Dear Media production. Hi, I'm Lisa Rinna.

[Harry Hamlin]

And I'm Harry Hamlin.

[Lisa Rinna]

And this is let's Not Talk about the Husband.

[Harry Hamlin]

We've been together for over 30 years, and we've been working in this industry a lot longer.

[Lisa Rinna]

Well, you know, we have some crazy stories to tell, and on this podcast, we're going to own it, baby.

[Harry Hamlin]

Buckle up. Let's get into today's episode. Hi, everybody. Welcome once again to let's Not Talk about the Husband with me and my beautiful wife, Lisa Rinna, who will probably talk about me, who knows? But anyway, I had this jones today. Before I came in, I wanted to play the guitar a little bit because it's been a couple of days. So here we go. I'm gonna play a little bit of guitar. This is gonna be a kind of a hybrid rendition of a Doc Watson and a little John Fahey mixed in.

[Lisa Rinna]

Who?

[Harry Hamlin]

John Fahey. Come on.

[Lisa Rinna]

I mean, it's me.

[Harry Hamlin]

If you're a guitar player.

[Lisa Rinna]

I wonder how many podcasters do that right before they're podcasting. I just felt like I love it.

[Harry Hamlin]

And someday I'm gonna get the balls to actually sing with it at the same time because I got a couple of songs, you know.

[Lisa Rinna]

Well, Harry, you just gotta do that. Come on. What do you mean?

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, I don't know.

[Lisa Rinna]

You got balls. You could do that.

[Harry Hamlin]

I do have balls. I was born with them.

[Lisa Rinna]

Anyway. Yeah, Anyway. Hi.

[Harry Hamlin]

Hi. Hi, wife.

[Lisa Rinna]

Hi. Hi, husband.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah, thanks for putting up for that with that.

[Lisa Rinna]

I will always. I listen to it every day almost. Well, first of all, let's talk about your fingernails. That's why your fingernails are long. And you go and see Linda. That's true. And she puts the acrylics on there because that's how you play the fingers.

[Harry Hamlin]

She is really one of the only people who's ever been able to do it correctly and to keep them on for a long time. And I'm sure that I've ruined my fingernails underneath, though I do from time to time give them a breather. And I don't. I went all fall this year without any acrylic fingernails. They didn't play good at all, car, for like four months.

[Lisa Rinna]

I know. Yeah, I know.

[Harry Hamlin]

But here we are anyway. And I was able to play and, yeah, it's all good.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah.

[Harry Hamlin]

So today I was thinking last night I was going like, wow, you know, I'm in my seventh decade and the place.

[Lisa Rinna]

Nobody can believe that, actually. Well, you know, I mean, it's hard to believe.

[Harry Hamlin]

It's it's the truth.

[Lisa Rinna]

I know.

[Harry Hamlin]

It is 1951, do the math.

[Lisa Rinna]

So we are old.

[Harry Hamlin]

I mean, why would anybody, you know?

[Lisa Rinna]

I know, but listen, younger generation, listen to us. We're young at heart.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, I do feel like I'm 20. I don't feel, I mean, I have no aches and pains. People always complain I got aches and pains. This is happening. That's happening. Nothing has happened yet. I'm still feeling like a 20 year old, so. But I was thinking last night, how, how the fuck did it happen that I made it this far and in this way? Because I'm the last man standing in my family. Yeah, both of my brothers, they, they checked out. I know, and they should not have. But they had a lifestyle that was not too conducive to long life, which is. And well, let's see. Alcoholism, smoking like amazing amounts of cigarettes, like two to three packs a day, drinking gallons of vodka, etc. And they were also kind of obnoxious. What can I tell you? I came from this family that was pretty dysfunctional. Now, okay, I gotta, I'm gonna back that up and say so. My dad was really, was brilliant. He was a rocket scientist, okay? So that's why I have this rocket back here, the Saturn V rocket. So this is the Saturn V rocket, my daddy's rocket, I always like to say, because these engines on the bottom, there are five of them, they're called the F1 engines. And they evolved out of an engine that my dad worked on when he was working at NASA.

[Lisa Rinna]

Now I have a question. Is that the same kind of rocket that the ladies went up in today? You know, the ladies, they went up.

[Harry Hamlin]

In Blue Origin today, which is what.

[Lisa Rinna]

Kind of a rocket?

[Harry Hamlin]

Okay, well, that's Jeff Bezos's company, right? And that's a tourist thing. So this was the Saturn V was there to take the astronauts to the moon.

[Lisa Rinna]

Okay, but what do you mean a tourist thing? Like, I do need. We'll get back to your story. But just quickly, what's the difference between this and those ladies? Meaning?

[Harry Hamlin]

Okay, well, there's a huge difference. Okay? This rocket is huge. The Saturn V rocket is one. Well, up until now, it's the biggest rocket that was ever built.

[Lisa Rinna]

Right.

[Harry Hamlin]

Elon Musk is working on a bigger rocket. It hasn't succeeded in doing much yet.

[Lisa Rinna]

Because his blow up all the time when they go up.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, a lot of the time, a lot of what happens with rockets, I mean, rocketry is really hard. And a lot of rockets, when they were testing them out. They blow up and whatever. And so his. His have blown up.

[Lisa Rinna]

So what's the difference? Why? What did the ladies go up in today?

[Harry Hamlin]

Okay, the ladies went up. Jeff Bezos, Beyonce Blue Origin rocket, which is designed to just go up to vary. Just touch space and give you a few minutes of weightlessness. Then it comes right back down and lands on a pad.

[Lisa Rinna]

Do you barf?

[Harry Hamlin]

Good question.

[Lisa Rinna]

Can you barf?

[Harry Hamlin]

Just because, like, I don't think Katy Perry would want to say that, whether or not she barfed or not.

[Lisa Rinna]

I'm going to ask Katy Perry if she barfed. Like, did they barf? Do barf?

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, I think the next time you see Katie or any of the other Lauren, I. I may be actually interfacing with one of them in a. In a couple of weeks on a talk show with Gail, possibly on a talk show.

[Lisa Rinna]

Oh, look at you. So ask her if she does.

[Harry Hamlin]

Ask her. Well, ask her. I'm not gonna ask her. I'm gonna ask her if she got sick or if it was nauseating or if in some way, you know, you feel like you're nauseated. And I'm sure you do, because, come on. Unless you've ever been weightless before, I'm sure the sensation of being weightless is, like, way different for your tummy.

[Lisa Rinna]

You know, I saw a video right before we came here, and they were showing the women getting on like they rang a bell to go get on the rocket. And one, I don't know, the first woman who came out. But then Gayle comes out and she has the most, like, the look on her face is death defying. Like, she doesn't know if she's gonna make it or not. And here she goes like, I've never seen Gayle King.

[Harry Hamlin]

So she was like. She looked petrified, you mean?

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah, but even more than that, I've never seen a look on anybody's face quite like it. But it also said everything.

[Harry Hamlin]

Wow.

[Lisa Rinna]

Anyway, so I look, it's pretty interesting. Cause, I mean, we see Gayle King on TV all the time, and she's Oprah's best friend. And Oprah was there, like, crying while everybody went up. Oh, Kris Jenner and Khloe were there. Like they were cheering on these girls.

[Harry Hamlin]

Is that right?

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah.

[Harry Hamlin]

Now would you want to do that?

[Lisa Rinna]

No. I mean, not really.

[Harry Hamlin]

It doesn't sound like much of a deal. Like 10 minutes, you take off, you go up, you're wait list for a few minutes, you come back down, I go, come on.

[Lisa Rinna]

No, but I think, listen, if you want to do it. It's like skyd. I would not skydive.

[Harry Hamlin]

But it's bragging rights. Right. I mean, you do something like that to say you did it. I mean, there's the experience of going up in a rocket for a couple of seconds and then coming back down. Doesn't really spin my turbines. Yeah, but you know, at the same time, you can say, well, I. I went into space. Yeah, whatever. You know, it's.

[Lisa Rinna]

And it was all women. It was all kind of like a thing.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, yeah, I mean, Look, I think Mr. Bezos is trying to basically market his tourist attraction. You know, to get these. You know, it's costing.

[Lisa Rinna]

How much does it cost?

[Harry Hamlin]

I think it's really.

[Lisa Rinna]

Is it like a million dollars?

[Harry Hamlin]

Unless they may. Probably more, I think. And if they ask you to go as a sort of promotional thing, then it's probably free. I don't know if these girls had to pay for it or not.

[Lisa Rinna]

Didn't William Shatner do it?

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah, William Shatner did it for sure.

[Lisa Rinna]

Did it?

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah. He was one of the first ones to do it.

[Lisa Rinna]

Right.

[Harry Hamlin]

I don't know. I'll be interesting to see how they describe their experiences now that they're back. Yes, but getting back to my story.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yes, getting back to your story, because your dad's the rocket scientist.

[Harry Hamlin]

Was a rocket scientist. And so it's kind of interest how he became a rocket scientist, too. You know, my father grew up at the beginning of the 20th century when to get a girl. I mean, to get girls. I mean, now in this day and age, how do you get a girl? I mean, you're a guy growing up. What's the best way to get a girl?

[Lisa Rinna]

I guess you go on Raya or you DM them. That seems to be what they do. They DM each other.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, that's true. And I suppose that works to some degree. Back in those days, there was no DMing.

[Lisa Rinna]

So what did you do in the early 1900s to get a girl?

[Harry Hamlin]

When I was growing up to get a girl, you became a rock star, Right. Or a movie star. That was kind of. You did one of those two things. You could pretty much guarantee that you were gonna get laid and you were gonna get laid with whom you want, you know, it was one of those things. Right. I mean, I'm a guy. Right. Boys will be boys.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yes.

[Harry Hamlin]

So back in the day, so they say, when my father was growing up, the movies were just getting started. There was no rock stardom.

[Lisa Rinna]

It was still silent movies.

[Harry Hamlin]

There wasn't a lot of stardom. Out there so you could grab a girl 18. But people hadn't gone very fast at that point. So people had been riding machines. Exactly. They had been riding horses. And maybe some people had been on a train that went faster than a horse. But mainly you went as fast as a horse could go. I mean, that's how fast you went. Because there were no machines that went any faster than that. So if you went fast, if you were a speed demon, that could get you a girl.

[Lisa Rinna]

Why? How?

[Harry Hamlin]

Because girls were into, like, stuff that was new and different and interesting. And if a guy could. Could figure out how to make a car go really fast, or in my father's case, a boat go really fast, he could get the attention of the girls. And my father grew up on a lake in Canada, where we go now to our cabin. And at the time, people were starting to tinker around with motorboats. And to get a motor boat to go fast through the water was a thing where he was growing up. And the faster you go, the more girls you got. So it was one of these things where he was after this one girl and she wasn't paying a lot of attention to him. He did finally get her in the end, but he started to figure the best way for me to get the attention of this girl is to start building faster and faster boats. So he went to college.

[Lisa Rinna]

So it's really all about getting fucked. At the end of the day, it's all about sex. Oh, my God.

[Harry Hamlin]

It's all about sex.

[Lisa Rinna]

It really is. I'm sorry to be so blunt, but I'm not, because, you know, it's me.

[Harry Hamlin]

I had an acting coach once, because it's me. He said every scene, every acting scene, scene you'll ever do is all it comes down to. The bottom line is about sex. It really is getting the girl or getting the guy.

[Lisa Rinna]

It really is, isn't it?

[Harry Hamlin]

It does come down to that, you.

[Lisa Rinna]

Know, but that's in the early. That's when you're procreating. That's when you still are making babies.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, that's true too, you know, we're not really making babies anymore.

[Lisa Rinna]

Exactly. So it does change.

[Harry Hamlin]

You still like sex, but not the same way you do when you're young like that. When you're, you know, you're a young stallion and you want to, you know, you want to basically dip into everything you possibly can.

[Lisa Rinna]

Lord too much information. But what I'm saying is, I think it's so interesting. Well, it's not that what I'm saying, because I didn't say anything. Why fast boat? Why a fast boat wouldn't actually do it for me.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, it wouldn't do it for you now because fast boats are, you know, they're a dime a dozen. But back then, to go fast, to go faster than 60 miles an hour, you know, there was a saying going like 60, and if, you know that was the same, it was like, really? Well, that person's going like 60, that means they're really, they're happening, right? Going like 60. Because nobody had gone over 60 miles an hour before, you know, so wow. To go 60 miles an hour was a big deal. And it was kind of a, it was a milestone. So my dad wanted to get this girl and he started building faster and faster boats. And he finally said to himself, you know, I'll bet you I can build the fastest boat in the world. And he went to MIT after college and he studied how to do that. And he learned smart things go really fast through water.

[Lisa Rinna]

Super smart and air.

[Harry Hamlin]

And he did. He ended up building the fastest boat in the world. And he won the world speed record in 1939 for going like 89 point something miles per hour.

[Lisa Rinna]

And that seems like nothing, doesn't it, right now, like at the time, because you can do that and you're, you can go 100 and some odd miles in your car, easy.

[Harry Hamlin]

But then, then it was a huge achievement.

[Lisa Rinna]

Wow.

[Harry Hamlin]

And because he knew how to make stuff go so fast through water and air, he was tapped by the government to work on rockets.

[Lisa Rinna]

Ah. How did they know that? They.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, he. Unfortunately, while during the process of building this boat and winning the world's record, the steering cable on his boat broke one day in a test drive. He was going 90 miles an hour. Boat flipped over, threw him out and then came, went over his arm and his left arm was cut right off.

[Lisa Rinna]

That's right.

[Harry Hamlin]

And then they. He had it and he.

[Lisa Rinna]

No.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yes, they got it and they took it to a hospital and they sewed it back on.

[Lisa Rinna]

No.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yes.

[Lisa Rinna]

The whole arm.

[Harry Hamlin]

His whole arm.

[Lisa Rinna]

The. From the shoulder.

[Harry Hamlin]

From the shoulder.

[Lisa Rinna]

Oh, yeah. So like Frankenstein in a way.

[Harry Hamlin]

I mean, they put him back together. His arm was. It might have been hanging off by a couple of some skin or something, but they basically sewed it back on.

[Lisa Rinna]

Oh my God.

[Harry Hamlin]

And in the process of doing that, the, the blood flow to his hand was disturbed and he lost the three fingers, three middle fingers on his left hand.

[Lisa Rinna]

Gone. Bye bye, bye, bye bye.

[Harry Hamlin]

My father only had a little finger and a thumb and he was able to do all kinds of things like this. Yeah, we called him the Claw growing up.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah, that's kind of interesting that my mom, you know, had her.

[Harry Hamlin]

Oh, that's right. Two fingers sliced by the guy by the cereal.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah, that's what. That's interesting. Kind of.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, there's some synergy there, I suppose. It's a little bit thin, but why not?

[Lisa Rinna]

It's a little bit morbidly so then.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah, the government tapped him because his arm was cut off during the Second World War. He was 4F, couldn't go to the war, so he went to work for Bell Labs, which was developing the helicopter.

[Lisa Rinna]

Probably saved his life also, too. Yeah, at the end of the day.

[Harry Hamlin]

And Bell Labs was working with the government during the war on all kinds of new, advanced scientific weapons and whatever. And so they recognized that my dad had this skill, knew how to make things go fast through air and water. So they tapped him to be in the space program. So that's kind of how that happened. But aside from the fact of him being an extraordinary genius when it comes to that kind of stuff, what kind.

[Lisa Rinna]

Of father was he? He was also.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, he was an absent father because the moment Kennedy said, we're going to put a man on the moon in the next decade, all the people who worked in the space program basically disappeared, you know, because they went to work and they. And not only that, but John Kennedy was shooting this concoction by a guy named Max James.

[Lisa Rinna]

Oh, now, this is a good story. Let's tell this story. This is really good. So explain it. Okay, explain this story.

[Harry Hamlin]

All right.

[Lisa Rinna]

So this is great. It's a great story, you guys.

[Harry Hamlin]

So there's a book out there called Dr. Feelgood about Dr. Max Jacobson. And Max Jacobson, after the Second World War, began distributing what he called his cell therapy concoction, a vitamin B cell therapy concoction, which gave you a boost of energy. And Marilyn Monroe started to take it. And then she introduced it to Kennedy during. When he was president. And then all of.

[Lisa Rinna]

Because he had back issues, a lot of physical issues, allegedly.

[Harry Hamlin]

But this was this concoction.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yes, it's 12 feel good concoction.

[Harry Hamlin]

And basically when Kennedy started to take. He recognized that if he shot himself up with this stuff, he could do the work of 10 men. All of a sudden it's like, wow, this is amazing. This stuff makes me really work hard and really fast. And so he made sure that all the big players in the space program were distributed this drug. And so my father started getting. Once a week, he started getting A shot bottle in the mail, a little bottle with this stuff in it, and a bunch of syringes. And he started shooting himself up, you know, in the 60s, in the early 60s, with this stuff, because they had to get this man on the moon. They had to beat the Russians. Right. So my father became addicted to this stuff, as did my mother, because he said, oh, my God, I don't even feel a hangover this morning after he did it the first time. And my mother said, you don't feel a hangover, really? And she said, can I have some? And so he began shooting her up with it, too, every morning.

[Lisa Rinna]

So they had their cocktails at night.

[Harry Hamlin]

They had many cocktails at night. And then they would fight like cats and dogs, which is why I still have sleep problems now, I think, because I would. I'd crawl up into my bed, and then I'd hear them screaming at each other all night long because they would. They had this routine where they would. They had the cocktail hour. A play was written or a book was written about the cocktail hour because they.

[Lisa Rinna]

I mean, Virginia Woolf. Hello.

[Harry Hamlin]

Exactly.

[Lisa Rinna]

It's like that. It's like Virginia Woolf.

[Harry Hamlin]

Easily like Virginia.

[Lisa Rinna]

Right?

[Harry Hamlin]

And if they screamed at each other every night. Yes. That's kind of this weird, dysfunctional family that I grew up in, with my. My parents being not only brilliant on some levels, but also total alcoholics. I mean, and my mother smoked like a chimney. In fact, she told me that while I was gestating in her belly, she was drinking a pitcher of martinis every night and smoking two packs of Kents a day. Shut up. No, in those days, there was no doctor.

[Lisa Rinna]

I know, I know. They all.

[Harry Hamlin]

They all drank and smoked. Nobody knew that. You know, if you had a baby growing inside of, you might want to eat clean food or whatever.

[Lisa Rinna]

So that's why you're so fucked up.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, exactly. That's what I'm getting to. It's like, how the. Did I. Did I make it through when my brothers didn't? And stuff like that.

[Lisa Rinna]

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[Harry Hamlin]

To you by nocd. Our daughter Delilah has ocd and I can tell you OCD is not what most people think. That stereotype about liking things organized has it totally wrong. Real OCD involves thoughts you can't stop, don't want, and often feel ashamed or scared to be thinking like, what if I don't really love my partner when that thought feels out of sync with how you actually feel. Or what if I snap and do something horrible even though that's the last thing you'd ever want to do? Then your brain tells you to do something about those thoughts just to feel okay. But no matter what you try, the relief never lasts. OCD is a lot more common and a lot more serious than most people realize. We saw this up close with Delilah when she started showing signs of the condition, but here's why we felt hopeful and why you can too. OCD is very treatable with the right kind of therapy. Standard talk therapy, the kind you hear about a lot online, usually doesn't help ocd. In fact, it often makes it worse. OCD needs specialized treatment, and that's why I want to tell you about nocd. NOCD is the world's largest OCD treatment provider, and they're not your average virtual therapy platform. It's specifically designed for people with OCD and all of their therapists are trained in ERP therapy, which is proven to be the most effective treatment for OCD. NOCD makes treatment accessible with insurance coverage for over 155 million Americans and provides support between your sessions so you're never alone. If any of this sounds familiar, go to nocd.com and book a free call to learn how they can help. That's n-o c d.com getting back to the shop. Get back to the shop. So, I mean, everybody thought that it was vitamin B and some kind of cell, embryonic cells from some animal. I don't know. That's how he sold it, right? And then it turns out that it was almost pure methamphetamine. And that's why when you shot yourself up with it, you did the work of 10 men. So my parents both shot themselves up with this for 10 years.

[Lisa Rinna]

What?

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah, all during the 60s until they finally they busted Max Jacobson, the doctor. And they didn't put him in jail, but they took away his license and he was threatened with jail, but everybody found out that they'd been shooting up this horrible methamphetamine for all this time. And it basically, it ruined my parents lives. I mean, they died way too young and it fucked them up. I mean, their heads were totally fucked up from shooting up speed every day and drinking all the alcohol that they drank. My mother smoking all the cigarettes that she smoked. And unfortunately my two brothers adopted their lifestyle.

[Lisa Rinna]

I know.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah.

[Lisa Rinna]

I mean, I know, but of course that's what happens. You adopt.

[Harry Hamlin]

But I got saved. How I was saved. Well, you know, I mean, not only were my parents, you know, drinking all this alcohol and they were fighting all the time, but they were also pretty obnoxious. I mean, I know they thought they were like, that their shit didn't stink. And I don't know, they were lived in Pasadena and they were members of all the right clubs and stuff like that and. And so they bred these little obnoxious children. Me and my brothers, I mean, we were. You didn't. I mean, people didn't want to be around us.

[Lisa Rinna]

I mean, really.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, I was really.

[Lisa Rinna]

You were badly behaved.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yes, I was really obnoxious and.

[Lisa Rinna]

Really.

[Harry Hamlin]

And I felt like I was better than everybody and.

[Lisa Rinna]

Really?

[Harry Hamlin]

Yes.

[Lisa Rinna]

Oh, I would not have liked you.

[Harry Hamlin]

No, you would not have. No one would have liked me. No, I was not likable at all as a kid. And I. And I. And I also was stupid. So I, you know, I had. I had terrible grades in like all like C's and D's and F's and like that when I was in, in I was a dreamer, and I wouldn't pay attention in class. And so I was sent to summer camp, this academic summer camp when I was 15 years old. And it was in. In New Hampshire, in Lake Winnipesaukee. And I'd never been to a sleepaway camp before. And I go there and I'm. I've got a bunch of tent mates and we're, you know, we're. We're sitting around. And I'm sitting around being horribly obnoxious, right? And I'm sure just pissing everybody off. And I must have said something really, really, really obnoxious because the camp counselor grabbed me by the neck, took me behind the tent and beat the shit out of me.

[Lisa Rinna]

Gosh, you're kidding.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah. And. And basically he said, you know what?

[Lisa Rinna]

I've actually heard this story.

[Harry Hamlin]

He said, the way you're behav. Behaving is like, just not right. You're not being a human being. I mean, he just really laid into me and he saved my life. And I wish I could find that guy. I.

[Lisa Rinna]

If he's still alive, you might just find him now.

[Harry Hamlin]

Maybe somebody out there remembers the wolf. 65 or 6, whatever it was, whoever beat the shit out of me saved my life. Wherever you are, I hope you find me, because that guy straightened me out. Totally straightened me out.

[Lisa Rinna]

Why do you think it stuck? Why didn't you rebel and go, fuck you? You're all.

[Harry Hamlin]

Because he showed me what was real. I mean, he laid it right out. And he said, no, we don't behave like that. We treat people better than that. You're not better than everybody. And everybody puts their pants on one leg at a time. All that stuff. Now that we teach our kids. This guy taught me.

[Lisa Rinna]

Wow.

[Harry Hamlin]

In an afternoon in summer camp when I was 15 years old. And thank the Lord because both my brothers didn't have that experience. And they went off to become alcoholics, smoke cigarettes and do bad things and die early. Way too early. Yeah.

[Lisa Rinna]

Your brother David died at 61.

[Harry Hamlin]

61.

[Lisa Rinna]

61.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah.

[Lisa Rinna]

Oi.

[Harry Hamlin]

And then my brother Clay was like 72 or something.

[Lisa Rinna]

That's too young.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah. I mean. And they were both kind of really out of it. My brother David, I remember him calling me up one day. He said, you know, Harry, I could only walk about 30ft. I've got to stop and catch my breath. I go, david.

[Lisa Rinna]

I know. I remember after he died and you went and got his stuff, he was living in a small apartment, and you had put it in the back of the truck or the Car. The Toyota. And I remember how much it smelled like cigarettes.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yes. Yeah. I actually remember everything that he owned by that time in his life could fit in the trunk of my car. And it was all so enshrouded with nicotine. So sad that I still have a lamp that I put in the workshop at the house. And I can still. If I pull the lamp down, I can still smell the smell of tobacco on it.

[Lisa Rinna]

Oh, you know what else we have to talk about? I flashed on it. Your mom and the pennies. Bag.

[Harry Hamlin]

My mom and the pennies. Oh, well, okay. I haven't told that story, have I?

[Lisa Rinna]

No, I think you should tell that story while we're talking about your. I mean, when you're ready to. If you're done with this part of your story, I think maybe you could add that to it.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, I always wonder how it is that I managed to, you know, to escape the same patterns that my brothers fell into and the rest of my family. Because, like I said, I am the last man standing.

[Lisa Rinna]

Right. Why do you think you did? Because first of all, the.

[Harry Hamlin]

I think the camp counselor. And then I also. When I was in college, I began to study psychology, and I ended up getting a degree in psychology just because I had to get another degree. They wouldn't. At Yale, they wouldn't give you a degree in drama alone. You had to have a double degree. You had, if not something else that you studied because they felt the drama wasn't. I guess.

[Lisa Rinna]

But you can now, right, get a degree?

[Harry Hamlin]

I don't know. This was 50 years ago. I have no idea. But I had to get a second degree, and so I chose psychology. And I think, you know, studying the psychology probably helped me to understand the human condition a little bit better than my brothers did because they never studied anything like that. They also never had therapy. And. And I did interventions on both of them. You know, alcoholic interventions.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yes.

[Harry Hamlin]

I did two on my eldest brother and one on my. On David.

[Lisa Rinna]

Did they both go?

[Harry Hamlin]

They both went, but it didn't stick. They went. My eldest brother went to Betty Ford, I think twice. And they. As soon as he got out, he went to a bar, you know, that kind of thing. And my younger brother David, he went once, right? He went to a place called the Oasis, and then he staged a rebellion there. He got all the inmates, or whatever they are, the patients.

[Lisa Rinna]

Well, I think they're inmates.

[Harry Hamlin]

They got all the patients together, and he created a mutiny. And he thought they weren't being treated right, and they weren't. And they all got Together and revolted against the head of the institution. And then my brother, being the ringleader of that, was fired and kicked out. He was kicked out of rehab.

[Lisa Rinna]

Kicked out of rehab. W. So you think the psychology did help? It must have.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah. I'm sure it did. You know, and then. And then after that, years of reflection on, you know, weird things that happen in your life. Going through divorces, and I did the course in miracles and a few other things that were recommended to me to sort of get my. Together.

[Lisa Rinna]

And then you met me and.

[Harry Hamlin]

And. But meeting you was the. Was the whole thing.

[Lisa Rinna]

And then you met.

[Harry Hamlin]

You saved my life. It is. It's true. You saved my life. Yeah. You hung in there during a very difficult time.

[Lisa Rinna]

I did.

[Harry Hamlin]

In my life. And you were a true believer. And thank you.

[Lisa Rinna]

Well, I knew you'd make good babies. I mean, selfishly, I was like, you know what?

[Harry Hamlin]

It was all about the DNA.

[Lisa Rinna]

That's sperm right there. So I think that's why I hung in, because, look.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, I know we did make some pretty good.

[Lisa Rinna]

We made some good kids. Not only are they cute, they're nice. They're good girls.

[Harry Hamlin]

They are extraordinarily nice. Extraordinary humans, role models out there for people. And my parents were the worst role models for me you could possibly imagine. How about your parents? Did you think they were good role models?

[Lisa Rinna]

I do. Even though, I mean, listen, we grew up in the 60s and 70s. We are fucked up no matter what we are. Like, we didn't talk about our feelings. We swept everything under the carpet. Nobody. Like, my mom never went to therapy after being attacked by the serial killer. The first she went to therapy one time. They gave her second all.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, you would think that therapy after being attacked by a serial killer and surviving it would be like the number one thing on your list.

[Lisa Rinna]

They didn't do it then. Like, it just wasn't. What I'm saying is, during that time, certain things just weren't done, you know? It wasn't about therapy. Imagine. She never went to therapy.

[Harry Hamlin]

No. People didn't discuss their feelings at all back then. My father never talked about his feelings ever. One time. One time.

[Lisa Rinna]

What'd he do?

[Harry Hamlin]

He took me into a room and he sat me down and he said, harry, I have something very important to tell you.

[Lisa Rinna]

Oh, my God.

[Harry Hamlin]

Were you like, oh, and I'll never forget. I remember it so vividly. I even remember the way. You know how sometimes in the afternoon when the sun comes through the room and the dust particles are in the air and you can see those Dust particles. Yes, I remember that. Absolutely. On this day, day, my father sat me down, he said, now, son, I just need you to know that there are no such thing as feelings.

[Lisa Rinna]

What?

[Harry Hamlin]

Feelings don't exist.

[Lisa Rinna]

He said that to you?

[Harry Hamlin]

Yes, he did. He said, there are no such things as feelings. I've been trying to sort of figure out what that meant for the rest of my life. I've kind of let it go, but I thought it was.

[Lisa Rinna]

Have you been to therapy about that? Have you talked about it?

[Harry Hamlin]

I have discussed that. I've discussed that.

[Lisa Rinna]

There's no such thing as feelings.

[Harry Hamlin]

Feelings, yeah. There are some people who say feelings are not facts. And I'm still not sure exactly what that means. But I think feelings and emotions are the most critical things that we have in our lives. They're our guideposts. They're the things that shine the light on the path that we're supposed to take. Our feelings and our emotions. So I don't know whether my father. What he was thinking at the time, but I'll never forget how I felt when I walked out of that room, which was like, numb. I said, my father's an idiot.

[Lisa Rinna]

Is that what you thought?

[Harry Hamlin]

Is what I thought. I thought What? I just. I lost all respect for you at that moment.

[Lisa Rinna]

That's actually really sad. See, mine just didn't talk about anything, so it was just not. It was actually. That was the way that they felt, but they never said it. Like, no one ever said, there are no such things as feelings. They just acted that way.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, I think probably there was so much pain in his life because my mother was such a horrible wife to him. I mean, she was just not supportive at all.

[Lisa Rinna]

So sad. And they stayed together.

[Harry Hamlin]

They stayed together. And I remember saying to him at various times when I was finally a teenager and kind of my eyes were open. I said, why do you stay with her? And she treats you so horribly. And he just said, well, you don't understand, son. I love her. And they had this really interesting love relationship. Must have been horribly codependent. But then my father stopped drinking in his 60s and started to wear a beret.

[Lisa Rinna]

Was he in the program?

[Harry Hamlin]

He was in the program. And he started to meet these really interesting people. He went to art museums, and he became. He actually, he healed himself in the last 10 years of his life. He did. So I have to give him hats off for that.

[Lisa Rinna]

But your mom never did.

[Harry Hamlin]

She never did. No. She went to her grave just as she had always been.

[Lisa Rinna]

I think so many people can relate to this. Like, on so many levels. It's like you kind of see us out in the world and people project whatever onto us, but you don't really know. Like, you and I have never really had a chance to talk about these things. You know, as a housewife, you saw me as a fucking, you know, villain or whatever you saw me as. Or. You know what I mean? Like, and as an actor, LA Law, whatever. Clash of the Titans. Everyone sees you in a certain way. I think this is really fascinating. I'm fascinated just sitting here sharing these stories with you, because, I mean, I know this stuff. You know this stuff. Not all of it, but to talk about it like this, I think it's really super interesting.

[Harry Hamlin]

I mean, it took us getting into a podcast to have this conversation.

[Lisa Rinna]

I love it.

[Harry Hamlin]

I think it's good. I know. Everybody, come on in. Come on in. We're talking about our life.

[Lisa Rinna]

I think it's fascinating because I think that in life, when you're married as long as we've been, and you raise kids and you're going from one job to the next and you're going through your routines in life, and very rarely do you get to sit down and have these kinds of conversations, even if you go to dinner. For 25 years, all we talked about were the kids.

[Harry Hamlin]

I know. And then. And then the kids go, you got an empty nest. The kids are gone. What do you talk about? You just got a puppy. So we're talking about the puppy.

[Lisa Rinna]

Oh, my God.

[Harry Hamlin]

Okay.

[Lisa Rinna]

Which is fabulous. But also, I'm exhausted. I am. I'm exhausted.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, you forget what it's like to have a puppy. But anyway, it's.

[Lisa Rinna]

Anyway.

[Harry Hamlin]

Beautiful little thing that we have.

[Lisa Rinna]

So cute. Chita Rivera is her name. She's the cutest thing ever.

[Harry Hamlin]

You wanted me to talk about the Tommy Hilfiger bag?

[Lisa Rinna]

Oh, it's. Oh, yes.

[Harry Hamlin]

It morphed from a Penny's bag to a Tommy Hilfiger bag.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yes. I want you to tell that story because it's one of. Actually, it's one of Erika Jayne's favorite stories. Just to preface it, I told this story on Housewives. They cut it. They'd never used it.

[Harry Hamlin]

Really?

[Lisa Rinna]

Oh, yeah. We were at Kyle Richards house outside. She had that table. And it was maybe my second season, so maybe season six. And, you know, it was like everybody was there. Kim Richards was there. I tell this story.

[Harry Hamlin]

What possessed you to tell this story in that moment?

[Lisa Rinna]

It was relevant at the time, whatever we were talking about.

[Harry Hamlin]

So maybe it's a terrible story.

[Lisa Rinna]

No, it's A great story. Erica Jane loves this story. Laughed about. It's a brilliant story. So anyway, with that, tell the story. Okay, well, we won't cut it here. We can do whatever the fuck we want here. So we're not cutting it.

[Harry Hamlin]

Okay.

[Lisa Rinna]

Anyway, I've said fuck too many times today. Sorry. Give me a drinking game. Actually, this is a good podcast for a drinking game. Every time I say fuck. Drink. Okay.

[Harry Hamlin]

Anyway. What, coffee, Tea?

[Lisa Rinna]

What, no Tequila or. Okay, I don't know, maybe not. Okay, so tea. Okay, it's your turn.

[Harry Hamlin]

Okay, so in 1992, my mother passed.

[Lisa Rinna]

Away before I met you.

[Harry Hamlin]

Right before, just before we met. It caused the end of my marriage to my. My previous wife. She couldn't handle something as real as death. Anyway, so my mother dies and my brother is the executor of her estate. Now my brother, as I've mentioned, David, was. Well, he was an interesting dude, but had a lot of issues, drinking being one of them, smoking a lot of cigarettes being another. But he lost his job. He had a great job at Universal back in the early 80s and Lou Wasserman fired him because the studio wanted him to hide a million dollar discrepancy. My brother was the controller of Universal Studios, which was a huge job.

[Lisa Rinna]

Is that like an accountant type of.

[Harry Hamlin]

He was an accountant. He was a certified public accountant and he was hired by Universal to do their books as the controller. And somebody discovered a discrepancy of $1 million on some picture that was being done. And my brother went to the head of the studio and said, oh my God, I've discovered this million dollar discrepancy. What do I do? And they said, well, why don't you just find a way to hide it? Figure out. And he said, I can't do that. I'm a certified public accountant. I've taken a lot.

[Lisa Rinna]

Can I ever work for Universal again?

[Harry Hamlin]

I haven't worked for Universal in years. Anyway, that's another story altogether.

[Lisa Rinna]

Oh, wow.

[Harry Hamlin]

But yeah, so he was fired because he refused to hide the money. He refused to hide the discrepancy.

[Lisa Rinna]

Well, that's good.

[Harry Hamlin]

Which was very honorable, I think that's actually very. But he was fired. And as a result of being fired with a big job like that, he could never really work in Hollywood again. So the rest of his life was him trying to figure out how to make ends meet and trying to figure out how to keep himself above water. But one of the things he did was to become the executor of my mother's estate after she passed Away. Then I forgot about that. Years went by. You and I went off one summer for vacation to our place in Canada. We come home, and in our house, the way things work is Lisa goes and shops and shops and shops till she drops. And then she brings stuff home. And we've got all these bags from Barney's.

[Lisa Rinna]

That's not true, though. That's not really very true.

[Harry Hamlin]

We've got bags from Barney's. We've got bags from all these big department stores. And we sometimes would take stuff that we were no longer using in the house and we would put it in those bags. It would go into the basement where it would sit for a few months. And then we would say, well, that needs to go into storage. Or that needs to go to the Goodwill. Or somehow it would find its way out of the basement. Basement. But oftentimes there were three or four bags with stuff in the basement.

[Lisa Rinna]

We have a lot of stuff in our basement. And if you don't have a basement. But if you. You don't know. But if you do have a basement, you know, it be kind. It kind of becomes a storage.

[Harry Hamlin]

It's the catch all for all the junk you don't really want around anymore.

[Lisa Rinna]

It still is, by the way.

[Harry Hamlin]

Of course it is. And it will always be the catch all.

[Lisa Rinna]

But I'm not sure I would blame it all on me. There's plenty of stuff down there.

[Harry Hamlin]

Yeah, how is there blame?

[Lisa Rinna]

You shop till you drop. You do you have all the bags then? I did. Not anymore, anyway.

[Harry Hamlin]

But Lisa, she's got great taste. So she would shop at.

[Lisa Rinna]

Okay, you just redeemed yourself.

[Harry Hamlin]

Thank you. You shopped at the best shops, right?

[Lisa Rinna]

You redeemed yourself.

[Harry Hamlin]

So we come home from being away for the summer, and I go into the basement for one reason or another. And I see. I clock the bags. I clock the Barneys bags, the Sachs bag, the Neiman Marcus bag. And then I see this little bag with J.C. penney on the front. And I'm going, well, wait a minute. What's wrong with this picture? We've never really shopped at J.C. penney's before. Why is there a Penny's bag here? And I reach over and I pick it up, and it's stapled shut, and it's really heavy. And I go, what the heck is this? And I pull it out, open it up, and there is mom in a plastic box. And I didn't shake it. I didn't want to feel whether her teeth were, you know, shaking around in there.

[Lisa Rinna]

It was her ashes.

[Harry Hamlin]

It Was her ashes. She'd been cremated. And okay, so I go, wait a minute, why is mom in my basement? What's going on with this? So I call up my brother, say, dave, mom died like seven years ago. Why is the box in my basement? How did that get there? He said, well, you know, during the summer he, he thought he was down on his luck. And he drove an old Cutlass supreme from like the 70s or something. And he had had her in the trunk of his car for five or six years.

[Lisa Rinna]

She lived in the trunk of his car.

[Harry Hamlin]

I don't know if you say live, I'm sure her remains.

[Lisa Rinna]

She was there, were there rolling around.

[Harry Hamlin]

In the trunk of the car with some golf clubs or whatever. And he thought that maybe the reason he was down on his luck was because she was in the trunk of his car. And so he stole over to our house at one point while we were gone and asked the housekeeper if he could just put something in the basement, which he did. He deposited her in there.

[Lisa Rinna]

I didn't know that part of it.

[Harry Hamlin]

She was a big Republican and she always had my American flag out in front of her house. And I thought, well, I'm going to take care of the situation. I'm going to fix this situation. And I decided to drive her remains up to Twin Falls, Idaho, where she had been born and bury her with her father. And I transferred her from the pennies bag into a Tommy Hilfiger bag. Because of the red, white and blue colors. I thought maybe she would feel more comfortable.

[Lisa Rinna]

I didn't know that part of it.

[Harry Hamlin]

In a Tommy Hilfiger bag. And I put her in the bag. And then I bought a little tape recorder with that. That was. That was turned on by your voice. It was voice activated tape recorder. And I hung the microphone from the rear view mirror, put the tape recorder on the dash, put her on the passenger seat and drove the 15 hours up to Twin Falls, Idaho and had a one way conversation with her all the way up. And I have like four or five tapes because I went through four or five different tapes talking to her.

[Lisa Rinna]

Amazing. I remember this.

[Harry Hamlin]

She never talked back. And. And I've got. Still have all those tapes.

[Lisa Rinna]

Did you ever listen to them?

[Harry Hamlin]

I have not listened to them, but I have them all.

[Lisa Rinna]

So brilliant.

[Harry Hamlin]

Maybe you. I don't know, someday on my deathbed, maybe I'll listen to them. Don't know why, but. So I drove her all the way up to Twin Falls. And then I found my grandfather's grave. I never met my grandfather. He died Long before I was born. But I found his grave, and I had them dig a hole right in the middle of the grave where his crotch would be buried. Her there. Put the box down in there. And I'll never forget the guy with the backhoe said, do you want to say a few words? And I said, bye, Mom.

[Lisa Rinna]

And that was that.

[Harry Hamlin]

That was that.

[Lisa Rinna]

Wow, that is just such an amazing story.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, anyway, I mean, that was the way I've said farewell to my mom.

[Lisa Rinna]

Did you feel that? It was super healing to have that time to just talk and get whatever out that.

[Harry Hamlin]

I'm sure it was very cathartic. I mean, I don't really remember the drive up that much. I mean, I've got it all on tape. I could go back and listen to it. But I went through all the times, all the things. Because, you know, we develop resentments towards our parents for specific moments in our lives where they did shit.

[Lisa Rinna]

And you talked about that.

[Harry Hamlin]

I asked her, you know, why did you. Like. I was grounded. One time after I fell off my skateboard, I was skateboarding down a H. I was not supposed to be skateboarding down the day before spring break. And I landed on my two. On my wrists when I went off the skateboard, and I broke them both.

[Lisa Rinna]

I know. I remember.

[Harry Hamlin]

And I couldn't zip up my fly, couldn't wipe my butts. All this stuff.

[Lisa Rinna]

That's awful, actually.

[Harry Hamlin]

But I couldn't tell her. I couldn't tell her that I was in such. That I was.

[Lisa Rinna]

So you didn't tell her you broke your wrists?

[Harry Hamlin]

I couldn't because, you know, she grounded me, so I had to stay in my room. And she made me learn the 23rd Psalm, which I now know. The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want. He leadeth me beside the green pastures. And she made me learn that. And the whole time I was. My brother had to do everything for me. Had to zip up my pants and do all because I had two broken wrists. Anyway, so I talked to her about shit like that, you know, all the times that she, you know. Anyway, it was a. I don't want to go into any details about that, but, yeah, it was cathartic. It was an amazing moment. Yeah. When I met your mom and dad the first time and I got to know them, I wished that they had been my mom and dad. Because your parents were so special and so wonderful. Lo is such a wonderful human. And your dad, too.

[Lisa Rinna]

They were kind human beings, even though they had their. Listen, everybody has had their moments, but I think they Were so. Just kind. They were kind people.

[Harry Hamlin]

They were.

[Lisa Rinna]

They were lovely people.

[Harry Hamlin]

They were salt of the earth, your mom and your dad.

[Lisa Rinna]

You did always say, I wish they had been my parents, or I was glad that I got to. You were always glad you got to have the time with them.

[Harry Hamlin]

Sure.

[Lisa Rinna]

Cause they really. They were so sweet. Even though we never talked about feelings or, you know, my sister died, and then nobody ever talked about it again when I was younger.

[Harry Hamlin]

That's right. Well, that's an interesting story, too. So that's another thing, because I'm sure that had a lot to do with the way you grew up and how you evolved. Because your sister. Were you close with her at all?

[Lisa Rinna]

No, I didn't know her. So, really, I mean, I obviously met her. I was six when she died.

[Harry Hamlin]

And she was from your dad's first marriage?

[Lisa Rinna]

My dad's first marriage had two girls, and Laurine was six. Laurine was 21. And Nancy. Nancy was three years younger.

[Harry Hamlin]

Laureen is such an interesting name. I've never heard that name anywhere else. Laureen.

[Lisa Rinna]

Laureen. So I only remember, you know, I had this nanny. Lee was my Italian grandmother. That was my father's mother. And she. I mean, yes, father's mother. And she lived in Albany, California, and had this big house and always cooked all the time. That's all she ever did, was cook, cook, cook, cook, cook. So we'd go there for Thanksgiving and Christmases, and she had this big long table where in the basement with all. Like, they'd make wine, so they had the wine barrels. And I remember this big, long table. I'm not sure why, in the basement, but that's where it was. And I remember Lorene vaguely. She was really beautiful. And she smoked. I remember that. But I mean, I was little.

[Harry Hamlin]

So you hardly knew her when she died?

[Lisa Rinna]

No, I hardly knew her at all. I was only six. So it was.

[Harry Hamlin]

But your dad, well, it was the problem because he kind of withdrew. Right.

[Lisa Rinna]

That's what happened. So, you know, obviously my mother had her trauma, so.

[Harry Hamlin]

Lorene was 21, hit over the head by hand. Serial killer. Just trauma with a capital T, by the way.

[Lisa Rinna]

But, I mean, I think this really can help you to understand, you know, I think it helps the kids understand, too, like where I come from and how fucked up I am in a lot of ways. So what happened was when Lorene died and she died of a accidental overdose, they didn't, you know, label it as suicide. I don't think we'll ever know.

[Harry Hamlin]

What was she taking?

[Lisa Rinna]

I think it Was second all. And alcohol. I think she mixed it.

[Harry Hamlin]

So she got the second all from your mom?

[Lisa Rinna]

No, no, no, no, no. It was a big thing back then, in the 60s, 70s.

[Harry Hamlin]

My mom took them every day.

[Lisa Rinna]

You know what I mean? Yeah.

[Harry Hamlin]

So part of my mother's daily concoction.

[Lisa Rinna]

Exactly. So whatever happened, whatever reason, on a weekend that she overdosed. And I'll never forget, this is all I remember. I was in a bed somewhere in the Bay Area. I don't think it was my grandmother's house, but I was somewhere, and I was watching Bozo the Clown on tv, and they were all talking in the other room. You know how you just remember interesting things but not everything? That's what I remember. I was watching Bozo the Clown. Everybody's talking, and somebody comes in and says, your sister's sick. But I didn't really understand that. Next thing I know, they go to a funeral. We are. I'm not. I don't go. Like, I don't know anything. I think somebody finally tells me that she dies, but I don't. I'm six years old, swept under the carpet. No one ever talked about it. But I will say that my dad really retreated, and I think because obviously he was too afraid to really love me because it would be too painful if he lost me also.

[Harry Hamlin]

So you were an only child?

[Lisa Rinna]

I was an only child.

[Harry Hamlin]

The only other sister you would have.

[Lisa Rinna]

Had 15 years older.

[Harry Hamlin]

Do you ever wish you had a brother or sister?

[Lisa Rinna]

Oh, yeah. I always did. Oh, my gosh. That's why I always was with family that had lots of kids, so I would. My friends always had lots of siblings, so we had a family called the Boilers. They had six kids. I was there all the time.

[Harry Hamlin]

Are they the ones who went to the Catholic church and you went to church with them?

[Lisa Rinna]

They were the Catholic Church. That's when I went at 8 years old and took communion, and they were horrified. They were like, oh, my God. Somebody's got to go get Lisa. She's taking communion and she can't.

[Harry Hamlin]

She could go to hell. Right?

[Lisa Rinna]

I did it. It. I took it.

[Harry Hamlin]

Off you go. I mean, off to the.

[Lisa Rinna]

Off I went. You know, Another very sad story. I love this family. They had six kids, and then one night they had a fire at their house. Remember those Pong games? Pong is like a video game. Early, early, early video game.

[Harry Hamlin]

I remember Pong. Yeah.

[Lisa Rinna]

So they're saying. They said that what happened was it was Christmas Eve. It's really sad. And the pong game somehow melted, caused the fire. And Mr. Boiler and Joe, one of the brothers, and they were having a sleepover and that boy died.

[Harry Hamlin]

The father, too?

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah, the father, the boy and the sleepover and the dogs, because the father went back in the house to try and save them. And then, of course, died of smoke inhalation. My God, we're telling some sad stories today, but they're, you know, they're real. So that family I was very close to, I was 13 when this happened. And it was devastating as it was devastating when, you know, we lost my sister. And so, yes, we all have a lot of devastation, trauma.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, I think you somehow you evolved out of that of your household and you became like Lisa Rinna. I mean, how did. I don't know how when I first met you. I don't know how really there yet.

[Lisa Rinna]

You're not coming out of your shell. Scared to death. Scared to death.

[Harry Hamlin]

You were kind of scared when I first met you.

[Lisa Rinna]

Are you.

[Harry Hamlin]

You were kind of young.

[Lisa Rinna]

I was. Look at you now. Death. And people don't believe that. Remember we first met. I don't know if we told this story, but we went to Tahiti. You took me to Tahiti and you asked me to. We took a picture and you wanted me to, like, do something other than keep my hands at my side. You were like, do something. Can you imagine me, I know, being that maybe.

[Harry Hamlin]

Well, I'm picture. You know, you've got this ruin or something behind you. Maybe you would kind of want to go like that or something because you were just standing there.

[Lisa Rinna]

So maybe you're the one that created the monster. I don't know. You were like, can't you just do something maybe like that? And so then I did.

[Harry Hamlin]

You've been doing that for the rest of your life anyway.

[Lisa Rinna]

Wow, what a podcast today. It's like therapy almost, isn't it?

[Harry Hamlin]

I guess so. I mean, we're getting to know each other after 30 years, some odd years.

[Lisa Rinna]

I mean. Okay, people need to go have a cigarette after that. Okay, you literally need to go have a cigarette after that podcast. So enjoy.

[Harry Hamlin]

Thanks. Thanks for watching, everybody.

[Lisa Rinna]

Thanks for listening to our show. You can catch new episodes every Friday.

[Harry Hamlin]

And don't forget to subscribe so you don't miss anything.

[Lisa Rinna]

Yeah. And if you liked what you heard.

[Harry Hamlin]

Consider leaving us a rating or review. And make sure to tell all your friends, too. I mean, like, everyone you know and their mother.

[Lisa Rinna]

If you have a question for us or you need advice, God help you. Leave a voicemail using the link in our show notes. We might just answer your question in a future episode. Now you can find us on social media, LisaRina on Instagram. And then. Then I'm LisaRinaOfficial on TikTok.

[Harry Hamlin]

And I'm HarryRhamlin on Instagram.

[Lisa Rinna]

That's right.

[Harry Hamlin]

So see you next week.

[Lisa Rinna]

Until then, let's not talk about the husband. Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.