Who shows up for you?

In Episode 3 of Real Love Ready, Robin sits down with authors, comedians, and best friends since second grade Matt Ritter and Aaron Karo. They are the men behind the book The Buddy System and the podcast Man of the Year.

Their thesis is simple and radical at the same time: friendship is not a luxury, it is essential to our survival. And yet platonic love rarely gets the same attention as romantic love. We have entire industries built around finding a partner. But the friends who show up at 2am, who have known you since second grade, who celebrate your wins and sit with you in your grief? Those relationships tend to get taken for granted. This episode is here to change that.

Funny, warm, and quietly urgent, this conversation covers the loneliness epidemic, why your partner cannot be everything to you, and why the people who really show up are the ones you never forget.

This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. When life feels overwhelming, therapy can help. Sign up and get 10% off at betterhelp.com/loveready.

IN THIS EPISODE

(00:00:38) Episode Overview: Friendship as a Form of Love

(00:03:30) Matt & Aaron's Story: The Man of the Year

(00:06:49) The Male Friendship Crisis

(00:10:04) Friendship is the Most Underserved Relationship

(00:13:45) How to Actually Make New Friends

(00:21:15) Showing Up Through Grief and the Hard Moments

(00:23:03) Friendship Breakups and the Friend Emeritus

(00:25:22) Can Men and Women Really Be Just Friends?

(00:44:57) Rituals and Maintaining Your Friendships

(00:54:50) Myths of Friendship and Defining Love

QUOTES

"Our friends are so essential to our well-being and it's our biological need as human beings... Make that phone call, send the text, actually plan a date with your friend." - Robin Ducharme

"Men don't have falling outs. They have falling offs. You just don't talk to your friend for two weeks, then two months, then two years, and then you never talk to him again…but nothing happened." - Matt Ritter

"A useless friend is a friend who can do nothing for you. They can't help you in your job, they can't help you financially. They're just someone you enjoy hanging out with for the sake of hanging out. I think that's one of the purest forms of love." - Aaron Karo

ABOUT THE GUESTS

Matt Ritter and Aaron Karo are best friends and co-hosts of "Man of the Year," the #1 podcast on male friendship, and co-authors of "The Buddy System," the #1 bestselling new release in Friendship on Audible. Together they have been featured in The New York Times, on NPR, and the Today Show.

Matt is a former lawyer turned Hollywood creator and the leading voice of the modern friendship movement. Through his viral social content, newsletter "The Friendship Habit," and his company Friendship Productions, he is building a media empire devoted to helping people strengthen their social fitness in an age of disconnection.

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mattritter1/

Website: https://www.thefriendshipguy.com

Aaron is a screenwriter, comedian, and #1 New York Times bestselling author whose feature "Tickle Me Elmo" was voted #8 on the 2024 Black List. His next book, an oral history of the movie "Elf," will be published by HarperCollins in November 2026.

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/aaronkaro/

Website: https://aaronkaro.com/

GET THE REAL LOVE READY BOOK

Real Love Ready: A Guide to Relational Literacy is a clear, compassionate guide to the knowledge, skills, and daily practices that help us love with greater intention, truth, and heart.

https://geni.us/RealLoveReadyBook

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