Let's Talk Off Camera with Kelly Ripa

Episode: Jeff Selingo - "College: Who Gets In and Why"

Release Date: November 12, 2025
Host: Kelly Ripa
Guest: Jeff Selingo (author of Who Gets In and Why & Dream School: Finding the College That's Right for You)

Episode Overview

This compelling episode dives into one of the most stressful and talked-about topics for families: the college admissions process. Kelly Ripa chats with higher education journalist and author Jeff Selingo, unraveling the mysteries of who gets in, why, and how families can handle the stress, anxiety, and confusion that come along with applying to college in today’s ultra-competitive landscape. Listeners call in throughout the episode with pressing questions, making this a wide-ranging, pragmatic, and emotionally resonant conversation.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Stress and Reality of College Admissions

• The Emotional Toll: Kelly and co-hosts open up about the anxiety parents and students feel, how early the pressure starts, and the overwhelming focus on getting into a "top" school.

  • “It’s so, it’s so like labor intensive on the kids. It’s so much anxiety on the parents. You want to jump into their brains while they’re writing their college essays.” — Kelly (03:16)

• The Process Starts Early: Families tour colleges as early as freshman year of high school.

  • “For us, I felt like the process was anxiety inducing enough doing it as a junior...I couldn’t imagine starting that process two years sooner." — Kelly (02:58)

2. What Actually Matters in Admissions

• The Transcript Is King: Jeff emphasizes that the high school transcript—the rigor and combination of courses taken and grades achieved—is most critical, especially at selective institutions.

  • “They want kids who actually took like an interesting combination of courses.” — Jeff (00:59, 35:13)
  • “If you have a good transcript, that’s gonna get you more than 50% of the way there.” — Jeff (35:18)

• Extracurriculars & Authenticity: Not the quantity but the depth of involvement matters. Leadership, dedication, and unique combinations of activities stand out.

  • “She was denied within seven minutes because she just did a couple of activities but really didn’t dedicate herself to anything.” — Jeff, on a candidate at Emory (36:11)
  • “To be well rounded, I have to participate in 20 activities. It doesn’t necessarily mean that.” — Jeff (36:56)

• Essays & Videos: Essays are increasingly a speed-read for many admissions officers; some schools may move toward video submissions for authenticity and to avoid over-editing or AI-generated responses.

  • “The essay was the thing where, you know, we spent way more time and money and effort on it than admissions offices actually spent reading it.” — Jeff (26:14)

3. The Game of Early Decision and Algorithms

• Early Decision (ED) Dynamics: Applying ED can boost admission chances but can limit financial aid offers and bind students to one school.

  • “At the ED level, you’re probably not going to get the money that could be for grants or for scholarships.” — Jan (15:02)

• Herd Mentality: Students often apply “where everyone else is applying” due to tools like Naviance that highlight school “scatter plots,” perpetuating the sameness and the myth of the “one right school.”

  • “You’re going to follow the herd.” — Jeff (15:44)

4. Parental Approaches and College Choice Philosophy

• Avoiding Projecting Dreams: Parents are cautioned not to live vicariously through their children’s choices and to reverse the narrative: students are shoppers, not products.
  • “You are the one shopping for a college. It should not be the other way around.” — Kelly (13:44)
  • “Love the college that loves you back.” — Jeff (14:22)

5. Test Optional Trends

• SAT/ACT Uncertainty: Many schools are “test optional,” but in practice, science, engineering, and business programs often still value high test scores.

  • “It doesn’t mean optional, especially in certain majors...They’re going to want to see those math scores.” — Jeff (19:30)

• No 'One Right Answer': Even experts are unsure what’s best when choosing to submit scores.

  • “I have no idea. Like, he’s been in admissions for all these years and he has no idea.” — Jeff channels the MIT admissions dean (20:38)

6. Navigating Transfer Applications

• Give It Time: Students are encouraged to stick through at least a semester before considering a transfer; transferring to highly selective schools remains highly competitive.
  • “Let them stick it out through at least the first semester.” — Jeff (24:17)

7. The Role of Outside Advisors and Connections

• Advisors Can Help—But Are Not Magic: Independent college consultants can be useful for managing deadlines and mediating family disagreements, but not for skirting the system.

  • “In some ways these independent consultants could be therapists.” — Jeff (18:30)

• Connection-Based Admissions: Some schools still value personal connections more than others.

  • “There are places, trust me, that if you have the right parent, you’ll get in or the right connection.” — Jeff (41:40)

8. The Impact of AI

• AI in the Job Market and Admissions: Students should look for colleges incorporating AI across the curriculum. AI detection in essays is limited by the speed of application reviews.

  • “They’re reviewing these applications in 5, 6, 7 minutes...They just don’t have time to do it [AI detection].” — Jeff (34:06)

• “Places where professors have like redesigned courses to incorporate AI—look for that.” — Jeff (32:16)

9. Acceptance Rates, Yield, and Changing Admissions Landscape

• Yield Rate Manipulation: Highly selective schools play admission games with waitlists and ED to ensure they get students likely to enroll, while less selective schools have to offer more acceptances—says nothing about their quality.
  • “It has nothing to do with the quality of the school.” — Jeff (48:16)

10. Pursuing the “Right” Major and ROI

• Choose Passion Over “Hot” Fields: The job market changes; passion and skills carry further over a lifetime, especially in leadership roles.
  • “You may not have the job right out of college, but you could eventually get it…looking at the data over time, you’re going to turn out okay.” — Jeff (53:21)

Memorable Quotes & Moments

• “I stress this to all of my friends...You are accepting them. Is that a good way to frame it?” — Kelly (13:44)
• “What other thing do we buy when we’re 18 and still wear the sweatshirt and still advertise it?” — Jeff (13:13)
• “The application will show up...they’re going to make a decision in five, seven, nine minutes.” — Jeff (10:06)
• “Unless you’re hiring Rick Singer...he got out of jail and he’s back in the game again, believe it or not.” — Jeff (18:26)

Audience Q&A: Key Caller Questions & Expert Advice

| Timestamp | Caller | Question | Key Advice | |-----------|--------|----------|-----------| | 23:51 | Jessica (NYC) | Should a student transfer if unhappy at their college? | Wait until after first semester; it's not easier to get into a highly selective school as a transfer. (24:17) | | 25:13 | Shelley (VA) | SAT vs. ACT – difference and which to take? | Take both practice tests; there's no real difference anymore. (25:33) | | 26:03 | Jan | What’s with “A Day in the Life” videos in applications? | Videos are becoming popular as a more authentic, less ‘gameable’ alternative to essays. (26:14) | | 27:18 | Danielle (NYC) | What to do if your child is deferred? | Check deferral stats; some schools defer en masse. Stay in touch, but also consider other schools. (27:34) | | 31:16 | Michelle (Pittsburgh) | Music school portfolio tips? | Ask near peers recently admitted; requirements are detailed and competitive. (30:06) | | 32:05 | Susan (Toronto) | How is AI affecting post-college jobs? | Look for colleges who integrate AI into coursework; demand for these skills will only increase. (32:16) | | 37:29 | Cece (Delaware) | Transferring between art programs/majors? | Assess resources and enrollment trends at the new school; ensure it avoids problems at the old one. (38:07) | | 44:14 | Michelle (NYC) | Importance of internships for applications? | Internships (especially field-specific) help at selective schools; leadership also valued. (44:34) | | 49:24 | Kim (Indiana) | Transferring after community college | There may be fewer spots for transfer students, but direct admit programs can simplify transfer. (50:11) |

Notable Stories & Lighter Moments

• Michael’s "Istanbul" Agreement: Kelly describes her deal with her son—attending NYU as if he were studying abroad, only returning home during official breaks. He breaks the deal immediately, showing up at home after two hours.

  • “We walk in the front door, and who was standing there? Michael. That didn’t take. He lasted about two hours.” — Kelly (08:07)

• Rick Singer’s Return: The infamous “Varsity Blues” admissions consultant is reportedly back in business, to the hosts’ disbelief.

  • “Hey, it’s America, you have second chances, right?” — Jeff (18:32)

• Yield Rate Example: Jeff’s breakdown of how Duke controls yield vs. schools like Syracuse who must accept more students, challenging the idea that acceptance rates equal prestige. (46:56)

• Tulane’s Early Decision Punishment: The school punishes a high school for a single family breaking ED agreement—an example of how “the system” can have unintended consequences. (42:37)

Advice in a Nutshell

• Focus on Course Rigor and Grades—but don’t neglect deep engagement in extracurriculars.
• Be authentic—colleges can spot over-coached or inauthentic applications.
• Don’t obsess over one school—students thrive at a wide range of institutions.
• Look beyond rankings—and at the personal fit, resources, and learning opportunities.
• Stay flexible—the admissions landscape, job market, and technology are all changing fast.

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:47 — What makes an application stand out? (Transcript, activities)
• 09:34 — Are parents spending too much on application prep?
• 11:24 — Early Decision, yield games, and acceptance rates
• 13:44 — Changing the narrative: "You're shopping for the college"
• 19:30 — SAT/ACT and test optional realities
• 23:51 — First caller Q&A: Navigating transfers
• 35:13 — What makes a transcript stand out?
• 37:29 — The reality behind extracurriculars
• 46:56 — Acceptance vs. yield rates explained
• 52:15 — Best and worst Return-on-Investment (ROI) majors

Final Thoughts

Kelly wraps up with gratitude for Jeff’s insight and a wish for listeners that all kids find their dream schools—ideally, with full scholarships.

• “To all of our listeners, I hope all your kids get into their dream schools and I hope they get full scholarships. Wouldn’t that be amazing?” — Kelly (55:23)

Books Mentioned:

• Who Gets In and Why (Jeff Selingo)
• Dream School: Finding the College That’s Right for You (Jeff Selingo)

Summary by ChatGPT | For educational use