CboysTV on Sunday Scaries, Secrets Of Working With Ken, & Being Bullied

Summary

Podcast Summary: Life Wide Open with CboysTV

Episode: CboysTV on Sunday Scaries, Secrets Of Working With Ken, & Being Bullied
Date: July 6, 2023

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Episode Overview

This episode offers the signature CboysTV banter—raw, funny, packed with stories and behind-the-scenes peeks. The crew dives into topics ranging from wild childhood stories, working with “Ken and the Minions” in the merch bay, summer weekend hangovers and Sunday Scaries, unique vehicle builds, YouTube culture, and relationship/dating dynamics as influencers. The conversation is fast-paced, self-effacing, and peppered with classic Cboys humor and relatable insights.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Poison Ivy & Childhood Mishaps

• Opens with stories about poison ivy encounters: CJ recounts having severe poison ivy, even while stranded on a Canadian island, which spread “head to toe” ([02:24]).
  • Notable Story: CJ shares the worst case of poison ivy he’s heard—involving a couple getting intimate in the woods, only to suffer full-body rashes ([03:22]).
• Myths about poison ivy transmission are debated. Evan quips:
  "You're contagious to yourself." – Evan ([01:33])

2. Ken, the Merch Army & Workplace Dynamics

• Ken is missing from this episode as he’s “too busy shipping out merch.”
• The crew jokes about "Ken’s minions"—a playful nickname for his younger helpers.
  • Recurring “inside joke” about how Ken rules the merch bay, complete with “pledge of allegiance to a picture of him” and employees only speaking when spoken to ([07:02], [07:41]).
  • In reality, it’s a highly efficient, EDM-soundtracked system, where Ken scrolls Reddit and the others do the heavy lifting ([08:04]).
• Clarification: The “minions” are friends and acquaintances, not random hires.
• Fun hypothetical: Would it be too much to make them dress as Minions? The consensus: Ken's territory, not theirs ([09:33]).

3. Holiday Schedules, Hangovers, and the Sunday Scaries

• Reflection on how the 4th of July falling on a Tuesday ruins the rhythm for vacationers and partygoers ([10:44]):
  “By the time the 4th came, I was like kind of over just sitting around drinking... kinda want all of you guys to go home.” – Ben ([11:32])
• First-world problems aside, the crew discusses working through hangovers and the “Sunday Scaries” that follow:
  • The universal anxiety of Sunday evenings, even when you’re doing “the dream job” ([43:13]).
  • Advice and perspectives:
    “My hangover advice is, you gotta just keep moving. You gotta get up, you gotta get going.” – Ben ([41:55])
    Reference to Bert Kreischer: “Punish yourself. Get up, work out, make yourself feel better, and then get going.” – Ryan ([42:01])
  • Evan’s unique hangover routine includes watching the obscure YouTube doc “Carts of Darkness” ([43:24]).

4. Vehicle Builds, YouTube Niche Communities & Smart Car Culture

• Behind-the-scenes talk about upcoming videos and new builds—motorcycle jet skis, Hummer pontoons, and ideas for wild vehicles ([12:32], [13:14]).
• Notable anecdote: Big Wrench, their mechanic, rarely tests his own builds due to not wanting to fix them if they break ([13:18], [14:27]).
• Discussion of Trike Fest, three-wheelers, and the camaraderie among niche gearheads ([19:44]–[21:59]).
• The “niche aggregator” theory: the YouTube channel pulls in fans from various small vehicle subcultures ([22:21]–[23:44]).
  • The Cboys note how their content influences trends, e.g., rising Smart car prices:
    “We drove the price of smart cars up 100... now they're all, like, 10 grand. What the fuck happened?” – Ryan ([24:27], see also [24:35])

5. Behind the Scenes of CboysTV Stunts & Antics

• Recollection of stunts like jumping Smart cars into pools, easy-unloading vehicles from moving trucks, and riding in trailers during bachelor parties ([25:08]–[28:13]).
• Each of these is recounted with a blend of nostalgia and acknowledgment of their recklessness.
• Hilarious moment: Comparing the red Miata to “a red Etnies shoe” due to Evan’s footwear, leading to shoe-nostalgia ([29:06]–[30:24]).
• Shoe fashion, childhood trends, and the power balance band craze—reflecting on past fads and their (un)scientific claims ([59:18]–[60:30]).

6. Bullying, Fights, and School Stories

• Detailed stories about being bullied or dealing with bullies—including dramatic childhood chases, retaliatory pranks with sleds, and the psychological “hierarchy” of bullying ([35:37]–[37:46]).
  • Concise summary:
    “Mike got beat up first period, but second period, he went and kicked someone else.” – Ben ([36:36])
• CJ’s story about getting pushed down by “Ray, the local bully,” and the aftermath ([36:51]–[38:43]).
• Discussing skipping school, faking being sick, and their ethics around workplace attitudes ([38:43]–[40:36]).

7. Dating, OnlyFans, and Masculinity

• The conversation turns to modern relationships, asking: Is it “cucky” if your girlfriend does OnlyFans?
  • Wide range of opinions; some see it as hustling, others as strange, and a few as “cucky” depending on context ([63:28]–[65:16]).
  • Notable quote:
    “Everyone wants to date a hot chick. No one wants the hot… the problem with dating a hot chick is everyone thinks she’s hot.” – Ben ([65:50])

8. Other Memorable Tangents

• Debating the practicality and value of fitness bands—leading to a broader philosophical take on self-improvement and motivation ([53:09]–[56:44]).
  • Mike: “All [fitness bands] do is make people feel good. They're a waste of money and time.” ([55:33])
• Nostalgic references: Power Balance Bands, step counters, Segways, and the story of the Segway company owner dying after riding off a cliff ([59:18]–[61:19]).
• Jokes about building impossible vehicles, using wild contraptions, and the possibilities (or not) of skipping big wheel bikes over water ([46:44]).

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Notable Quotes & Moments (with Timestamps)

• On Ken and the Merch Army:
  "I saw them doing the pledge of allegiance to a picture every morning to a picture of him." – Ryan ([07:02])

• On Hangovers and Productivity:
  “My hangover advice is, you gotta just keep moving. You gotta get up, you gotta get going, you know?” – Ben ([41:55])

• On Childhood Fashion Regrets:
  “Looking back, why did I do this—so much work to lace them?” – Evan ([32:24])

• On Niche Content Creation:
  “It’s almost like we are like the Thanos of just grabbing all these collectives of people and... bringing them into our inner circle.” – CJ ([22:31])

• About Dating OnlyFans Girls:
  “I don't think so. I think they're just after the money.” – CJ ([63:44])

• On Being Bullied:
  “I was running, trying to get away from him and he pushed me and it was on like asphalt.” – CJ ([38:19])

• Power Balance Band Skepticism:
  “Ever since I got this power balance band, I haven’t gotten blown over in the wind once.” – CJ ([60:08])

• Tech Wearables Fatigue:
  “All the stuff it tells you is irrelevant... they’re a waste of money and time.” – Mike ([55:33])

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Timestamps for Major Segments

• Poison Ivy Stories: [00:52]–[04:08]
• Ken & Merch Army Stories: [06:32]–[09:47]
• Holiday, Hangovers, Sunday Scaries: [10:44]–[12:14]; [41:55]–[43:24]
• Vehicle Builds & Stunts: [12:32]–[18:20]; [22:21]–[28:13]
• 3-Wheeler/Trike Fest: [19:44]–[22:10]
• Smart Car Culture: [24:27]–[26:14]
• School Stories and Bullying: [35:37]–[38:43]
• Dating/OnlyFans Debate: [63:01]–[66:09]
• Fitness Gadgets Debate: [53:09]–[56:44]
• Power Balance/Skepticism: [59:18]–[60:30]
• Segway/Eccentric Inventions: [61:00]–[62:29]

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Final Thoughts

The episode is classic CboysTV: fast-moving, genuinely funny, and open about the stresses and joys of their lifestyle—from summer malaise, the grind of running a merch operation, to the nuances of relationships, trends, and being a part of online car culture. Their willingness to poke fun at themselves and each other keeps things relatable, making it feel like you’re sitting around with longtime friends—whether they’re talking about getting beat up in fourth grade, scheming the next wild video, or debating if OnlyFans is a relationship hazard.

Transcript

[Ben]

No other time in history was like, let's get the two richest men on the planet and have them fight each other.

[Mike]

Just envision the activities Mike's doing and what the.

[CJ]

Watch.

[Ryan]

Oh, wow. 35 minutes on the shake way today.

[Ben]

Mike got beat up first period, but second period, he wouldn't kick someone else.

[Ryan]

Ben, you've been dressing nicer lately.

[CJ]

Ryan, you have seen me wear one thing for the last seven years, and that's just a Seaboys T shirt. And I put. I literally have worn not a Seaboy's T shirt, just like a. Like a blank shirt or a blank long sleeve, like three times around. Ryan, he goes. Getting fancy, huh?

[Ryan]

I think a Seaboard shirt is even nice.

[CJ]

Nicer, right?

[Ben]

Yeah.

[CJ]

So that's where I was confused because I was like, I. I thought I was dressing down.

[Ryan]

I mean. Yeah, true, but it's just like, I've never seen this out of you.

[CJ]

New me.

[Ryan]

Well, I just figured you dug all that shit up when you moved and you were like, oh, I own this.

[CJ]

The only thing I dug up when I moved was poison ivy.

[Ryan]

Yeah. What's the deal?

[CJ]

Over my hands, bro. All over my ankles, everywhere. I could be downwind from poison ivy now.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Yeah. Honestly, I'm really nervous, like, being around you. It's not touching the same.

[CJ]

It's not contagious.

[Ryan]

Really? I thought the oils were contagious, you.

[Ben]

Know, I don't know. I don't know.

[CJ]

There's so many myths. I don't know. Every time I get poison ivy, I'm always like, looking up like, oh, home remedies for poison ivy. And I've got like, everything under the sun at this point to put on it. And like, nothing works besides for just like, letting it be for two weeks. But yeah, bro, I swear, I could literally be downwind from poison ivy and I would get it.

[Evan]

You're contagious to yourself.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Evan]

Literally spread it around like it's on your hand and you like, touch your arm and then it's on your arm the next day. Maybe in the same day.

[CJ]

Yeah. One time I got poison ivy when I was. I was doing landscaping for Dave and I must have weed whacked it or something. And it got on my legs, and then I must have not washed it off in time. My legs were together so that I got on both legs.

[Ryan]

Oh.

[CJ]

And then I got it on my arms. And then I was in Canada on a remote island when I. When it finally started to break out. So I was. I was on this island for three days without, like, A single thing to treat it with. And it spread over my entire body. And it was probably. It was one of the worst weeks, like, the following week of my life. Like, I couldn't move. I was laid up in bed for a week straight.

[Ryan]

Did you get it on your nuts?

[CJ]

Oh, bro, I got it everywhere.

[Mike]

Everywhere.

[CJ]

Well, so here's. Here's the worst poison ivy story I've ever heard, though. This had to have been, like, 10 years ago.

[Ben]

Yeah. We were kids.

[Ryan]

Oh, my God.

[CJ]

So me and CJ are out on our friend's boat, and our friend. My. My brother's friends, I should say. And they're older than us. They're maybe five, 10 years older. And anyway, we're, like, hanging out. We're pretty much just kids at this point. And next thing we know, two couple. Like, a guy and a girl. I don't think they were a couple. Started, like, making out in the front of a boat next to us. Right. And, you know, just being like, a little kid, you're just, like, wondering what's going on. Well, next thing you know, they swim to shore and they sneak up into, like, the beach. Like, kind of like beach woods. Yeah. And they're gone for about five, 10 minutes, maybe, being generous. And they come back and I didn't really think much of it. Apparently they went up into the. Into the woods and did the dirty, and they were literally smashing on poison ivy.

[Ryan]

He was laying in.

[CJ]

Laying in poison ivy, and I can't.

[Ben]

Believe they laid down.

[Ryan]

Yeah, that's pretty savage.

[CJ]

Must have been getting after it. So. So my. My brother's friend, basically, in the following days, wakes up poison ivy, head to toe everywhere. Except for his dick.

[Ryan]

Except.

[CJ]

Except it was the only thing. Yeah. But, like, head to toe. And that's how he got it.

[Ryan]

A little geography lesson.

[Ben]

So the.

[Ryan]

The beach that everybody parks at is actually on the road out to my dad's place. So I drive by that spot. I don't know the exact spot, but I drive by that every day.

[CJ]

That's kind of a legendary spot now.

[Ryan]

Yeah. I kind of look at it and I go, yeah, I don't think I'd smash there. Like, I just. It just doesn't seem right.

[CJ]

Just weeds and, like, man, you gotta be real horny. I mean, to do that.

[Ben]

Gotta take advantage when you got the opportunity.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Not everybody's so blessed to have such a good hand like you, Ben. Yeah.

[Evan]

Speaking of. Speaking of the good hand, though.

[CJ]

Yeah. Definitely hold off.

[Evan]

Sorry.

[Ben]

Yeah, definitely hold off on the good. Good and. Or probably both hands.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Evan]

And if you jerked off, would you get it on your dick?

[Ben]

I don't know.

[Ryan]

I don't think it's one of those.

[Ben]

Things you want to find out right out the gate?

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[CJ]

Yeah, I'd imagine. I mean, what would be stopping it? It's not like your dick has some, like, special superpower.

[Ben]

Well, some do.

[Ryan]

I thankfully don't. I've gotten poison ivy really bad, and I think I got it so bad that I just, like, now I'm immune to it. Is it like chick box? Like you get it really bad, but I guess you get it again?

[Ben]

Yeah.

[CJ]

I don't know. They say that, like, once you have it once really bad, then you'll never get it again. I've had it so bad so many times, and I keep getting it.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Ben]

When we went reckless golfing, I took a. And when I was taking the. I was in poison ivy.

[CJ]

Really?

[Ben]

Yeah. I took a. In the woods.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Ben]

It wasn't on the video, but I.

[Evan]

Can'T get it either. It's.

[Ben]

I'm pretty sure my ass touched a poison ivy leaf.

[CJ]

Oh, wow. You were hanging low.

[Ben]

Yeah. Yeah. And then I was like, oh. And then I like, scurried out and of did it right on the side of the car path.

[Evan]

I feel very lucky that I can't get it. And I feel like you have like, borderline disability when you get around it.

[Ryan]

Yeah, disability. I've got a good update from our fellas down in the big city of Minneapolis, and it's a little Minneapolis collab with the Kia boys.

[Evan]

Oh, wow.

[Ben]

Yeah, I love those guys.

[Evan]

Like, the Kia boys are in Minneapolis mobbing. Yeah, I wish I would have heard.

[Ben]

And you.

[Ryan]

You would have been there.

[Ben]

Pick up a couple k. Go join. What?

[Ryan]

Yeah, do turn up a little bit.

[Ben]

Why the he start shooting at him?

[Ryan]

I don't know. Shoot the guy on the street. Just downtown Minneapolis. Taylor Swiftville.

[Evan]

You must be rivals to the Kia boys.

[CJ]

The Honda boys.

[Ryan]

Yeah, the Honda boys.

[Ben]

What the. Who just starts shooting at one like that? Kind of random.

[Ryan]

Yeah, it's pretty crazy.

[Evan]

In the open downtown Minneapolis.

[Ben]

Evan. Evan.

[Ryan]

What's up, buddy?

[CJ]

Sitting in for big Ken Diesel.

[Evan]

Diesel.

[Ryan]

Bit of an exciting change. We got Evan behind the cameras at the desk today. Ken's too busy shipping out merch. I think he's darn near close. I think he's got everything out.

[Ben]

Yeah, they've been cranking it. Him and his team.

[Ryan]

Yep, his team. He does have a full blown army back there.

[Ben]

Army man. And they respect him. And he is just. I mean, he's really a great leader when he's in his merch bay.

[Ryan]

I saw them doing the pledge of allegiance to a picture every morning to a picture of him.

[CJ]

Yeah, I walked back there the other day looking for something, and I was kind of just sneaking in the shadows. They didn't know I was there. And I heard a couple daddies, like, they were. They were referencing daddy to Ken. I. I legit didn't even understand, like, a single thing that they were saying. Like, they have their own, like, cryptic language now.

[Ryan]

They do.

[CJ]

They have their own jokes, their own, like, everything, Everything is like an inside joke. Like, I don't. I'm not sure if they're speaking in Morse code or what because it's more efficient for Ken because he's too lazy to get out a full sentence.

[Evan]

No, I heard they. They definitely do have their own. Their own little lingo. But I heard they're only allowed to talk to each other. Not. They're not allowed to speak, they're not.

[CJ]

Allowed to talk to Ken.

[Mike]

They can't make eye contact with them. They have to look at the ground when Ken's talking.

[Evan]

Only speak when spoken to type of vibes.

[CJ]

No. All jokes aside, though, every time I do go back there and spend more than like 30 seconds, if I'm like, looking for something, it's just dead silent. Except for like a little edm.

[Ryan]

Yeah, there's a little music on.

[CJ]

He's got like a little wiggle dicking music going on in the background. And like, everyone's kind of just bobbing their head as they're like, pat packaging orders and stuff. And Ken is sitting at his desk.

[Ryan]

Scrolling Facebook, marketplace and Reddit. And they're all working. Ken's got it figured out, dude. He outsourced his whole job.

[CJ]

Yeah, he really did. So now I'm just wondering, what is he doing back there?

[Mike]

Smoking vapes?

[CJ]

It has been awfully cloudy. People have been complaining about their orders.

[Ben]

That they club in there with the music and then the smoke rolling out.

[Ryan]

Every time.

[Mike]

Every day they come to pick up orders when the garage door opens, it's just a smoke cloud rolling out.

[CJ]

Ken's got all of his minions three days vaping back there. I saw a comment on one of the podcasts that said it's so disrespectful that Ben calls Ken's workers minions. I would quit so fast. I was like, I'm not calling a minion. Ken calls him his minions. I'm just. I'm just passing on the message. And they refer to Themselves as Minions.

[Ben]

Yeah, I actually try not to call them that, but I will back up the Minion statement when where they are actually my younger brother's friends. And, like, they've been hanging around. They come and go like. Like we've known them for a long time. It's not like we just, like, picked.

[Ryan]

Them up off the street, put a.

[Ben]

A job, you know, opportunity in the newspaper. And these people are just random. Like, they're like, kind of friends. And like, they crack jokes with Ken, hence why they call him daddy and he calls them the Minions. You know, it's just.

[Mike]

Would it be crossing the line if we got them all Minion costumes and.

[Evan]

Require them to wear really funny funny?

[Ben]

I feel like they would straight up think it was funny, but I. I mean, I'm not gonna do that. That's Ken's. I mean, it's Ken's territory. I'm not gonna step in his territory.

[Mike]

What are the Minions Main guy dress like?

[Evan]

Oh, my gosh.

[CJ]

It's so accurate.

[Evan]

Okay, wait, I want to see it. Yeah, I went back there, I was showing someone around, and I was like, yep. So this is kind of the operations back here. And Carter goes, operations mean sweatshop.

[CJ]

Shut your mouth.

[Ryan]

It's the O guy.

[Ben]

No lunch for you today.

[CJ]

Ken walks over and just puts his hand on his mouth and just holds him.

[Evan]

So, yeah, the. The orders are pretty much out at this point. Hopefully everyone gets their stuff before 4th of July. That was the plan. And thanks for the support. Ken appreciates it. We know that.

[Ryan]

Yeah, it's actually after the 4th right now.

[Ben]

Oh, it's actually the 4th of July when.

[Evan]

Well, hopefully have your stuff by then.

[Ryan]

Now, I might not be lazy, but for the analytics post on Wednesday morning. So when you guys are back at work, Wednesday morning is going to be a tough one. Like, what's the. What do you guys think is the worst day to have the 4th of July on Tuesday?

[Ben]

Tuesday, bro. This kind of sucks.

[Ryan]

I feel like Tuesday or Wednesday, I.

[CJ]

Think Wednesday two years are going to.

[Ryan]

Be the worst because, like, Thursday I think, is the best because you get Thursday off and you obviously get Friday.

[Ben]

You go straight up hard. Yeah, right on Thursday, right out the gate. Where we live is kind of like this vacation area. Out of towners are filing in last night. Thursday, like, all the restaurants are packed, the highways all jammed up. There's tons and tons of people because obviously this is like where they want to spend the fourth. So they're going to be out here partying from Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday, and then Tuesday is the fourth now. So now it's like, oh, this is the big day. But it's like, wow, we just freaking went hard for the whole weekend. Because I remember this is how it went last year for me, because it would have been on a Monday.

[Ryan]

Wouldn't have.

[Ben]

And we had a bunch of people staying over, and it was so fun. It was like, Saturday was great. Sunday was like, okay, this. This is really fun. And then by the time the fourth came here, like, I'm like, kind of over, like, sitting around drinking like this. And. Yeah, I kind of want all of you guys to go home.

[CJ]

You know what, though, C.J. you got to be a patriot, and somebody's got to do it.

[Ben]

No. And I, don't get me wrong, I go out there and I crack a beer and I. I slam it down and wave a flag because that's the American way. That's the American way.

[CJ]

But, yeah, no, there is now. That guy. Now that guy's an alcoholic. Hey, he's a patriot.

[Ben]

It definitely is unfortunate, though, that it is a Tuesday.

[Evan]

But. But first world problems, you know, that really is.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

America problem.

[Ben]

The nice thing is, like, we'll probably, like, end up working on Monday a little bit. Like, we don't have to go. Like, we already live here.

[Evan]

Well, I'm. I'm pretty excited. I think Monday is going to be a good film day because we, for a few things we have going, we need some good reactions, and there's going to be a lot of people out. Yeah, I'm excited for that.

[Ben]

Yeah, I agree. Yeah, true.

[CJ]

We could almost film the Jet Skis on Monday.

[Evan]

I think either filming the Jet Skis or the Hummer pontoon on Monday makes the most sense because it's like the lull day, kind of.

[CJ]

I love that statement. Should we film our motorcycle Jet Skis on Monday, or do you think we should do the Hummer Pontoon?

[Ryan]

Well, with Big Wrench, the list of, like, odd contraptions are growing at this point. The Jet Skis. This video won't be out yet, so we probably can't spoil too much. But Big Wrench and I went for a cruise on one of his newest contraptions. And he was so proud. He didn't want to go. He's like, have you test driven it yet? And I was like, no, no, I haven't. And he was like, oh, take it for a spin. I was like, well, come with me. We got two. And we went and cruise. He was smiling the whole time. It was awesome.

[CJ]

Well, he built it so. And he's not entirely confident in his contraptions.

[Ben]

I'm confused by that because every time he builds anything or like whether it's because I've told him before, I was like, take it for a spin. Or it's like the Miata, like rip a drift or whatever. I always say, yeah, Brian, take it for a spin. You go, no, no, I'm good, I'm good.

[CJ]

I got a family at home.

[Ben]

Yeah, I don't know. I've always, I've always been a little curious. Like, I'm like, no one's filming. Like you putz around. Like, check it out. You built it, man. Like, go have fun.

[Ryan]

Yeah, enjoy it.

[CJ]

Hey, big ranch, Take the P Hummer pontoon out this weekend. No, seriously, I'm good. No, no, no. You got to enjoy the fruits of your labor.

[Ben]

Those jet skis do look so good though. Cuz when they're rolling you can't see the wheel. So it looks like they're just hovering. It is like it could not be any better.

[Ryan]

Every, everybody that's seen it has stopped and said something like, I. I rode down a dead end road and I came back and there was multiple people at the end of their driveways waiting for me to come back to, to talk about it. It is the most electric thing I've ever driven. It's. It's awesome. Well, it's not electric.

[CJ]

It's gonna be such a great, such a unit too.

[Ben]

It's so big. You're like kind of on it.

[CJ]

You're like, wow.

[Ben]

But like realistically you're just on a moped, but it feels so much bigger now. Yeah.

[Ryan]

Cuz you're driving a couch.

[Ben]

Yeah, you're literally driving a couch. It's so big.

[CJ]

That's the next thing we should have. Big wrench build.

[Ryan]

Dude, Big wrench just doesn't want to drive his contraptions because he doesn't want to break them because he knows he'll have to fix them. He's like, I ain't taking any chances and having a make myself get more work.

[Evan]

I want them to like build like an old john boat on a trailer just into a car. Basically. Like it's a john boat on a trailer. You just drive.

[CJ]

Oh, you're driving the actual trailer too.

[Evan]

Like the hitch is just, you know, that's the front of your car unit.

[Ben]

Yeah, it just looks like a, like a stray trailer that got loose from a truck.

[Ryan]

Oh my God.

[CJ]

And then you're just saying it just. Exactly.

[Ryan]

That's actually a pretty Good idea, Mike.

[Evan]

We gotta do that.

[Mike]

Have you guys seen the dragster? That is a camper. No, like exactly what you just said it. But it looks like a camper with a hitch sticking out the front.

[Ben]

Really?

[Mike]

It's a drag car? Yeah.

[Ryan]

What? That's awesome.

[Mike]

That's pretty sick.

[Ryan]

We should.

[Evan]

Jamie, pull that up.

[Ryan]

You got your computer ready?

[Evan]

Evan's the only one. Evan, you're probably the only one who's less qualified than Kendall.

[Ben]

I will say he's paying attention, though.

[Ryan]

Yeah, I know. Yeah, you're talking. Which is nice to see because Ken never does that. He just scrolls on his phone the whole time. Do we actually should do that bolt thing? Because it'd be hilarious. And just make it into a trike. You use the trailer wheels and then you put a wheel out in the front and then you have the boat steering tied up to the wheel in the front. And then you can actually drive it in the water because there's no holes in the boat. Like the boat would still function as a boat. And so you just drive into the water. It'll float the trailer.

[Ben]

Would it?

[Ryan]

Yeah, why not?

[Ben]

Yeah. Wood. I mean, it depends how big the boat is.

[Ryan]

It depends what motor you put in the thing because that would have.

[Mike]

Motor might be pretty low.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Unless you. You could like chain drive it down.

[Mike]

Yes.

[Ryan]

This is specific semantics problems for big wrench. But I think. I think it could work. You can put the motor in the boat inside of a cooler. Like a big cooler.

[Mike]

Then where will the teas go?

[Ryan]

In the secondary cooler.

[CJ]

Oh yeah. Driving behind.

[Mike]

Can't keep the tees in a trailer.

[CJ]

Are you going to get back to them?

[Ben]

It's better than the back of your truck. Ev.

[Mike]

If they're on a trailer, you'd be like Vin Diesel having to crawl back there while driving down the road.

[Ben]

Remember that one time when I rode in the. In the back of the. In the boat when we were on the way up to Justin's bachelor party.

[CJ]

I was in the both of us.

[Ben]

You were in it? Yeah. No, you weren't. It was just me, bro. I went like an hour by myself and the X30.

[Ryan]

I think I was with you. I think I was just. You were both in there and then you got out and it was just him for a while. Cuz we were just like on a country on. I was like, well, I'm not stopping.

[Ben]

Yeah, we chilling. It was kind of fun. It was nice. Cuz I got to lay out it was probably windiest. Super illegal. But yeah, I was a little worried I was like, man, if something happened for some reason, be bad, bad deal.

[Ryan]

But, yeah, you're not exactly seat belted in.

[Ben]

Or if the trailer just somehow randomly disconnected.

[Ryan]

I just got a video from our buddy, and it was a pontoon all mangled up sideways in the highway. It fallen off, the trailer came unhooked, and it looked like the trailer went like this. And then the pontoon fell off, and then it looked like the semi hit it. Oh, real bad. Bad News bears. Bad way to start your fourth weekend, I feel.

[Ben]

Yeah, that is unfortunate. They were probably trailing it down. They maybe had a rental. Like, that's.

[Ryan]

It was a nice. It was a nice pontoon. Nice truck that it fell off of. Like, probably just like when you do things too fast and. And you're stupid.

[CJ]

Get jammed up.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[CJ]

It's easy to get started in my.

[Ben]

Life doing stuff too quick. Yeah.

[Ryan]

What do you think's the most extreme thing you've done for a tee? Like, what's the biggest jam up you've been in? And you're. I was just thinking about that.

[CJ]

When you're talking about, like, don't incriminate this guy with his girlfriend.

[Ryan]

No, no, no, no, no. Like a T. When you were like, I. You know, I'd have to be like Vin Diesel crawling into the back of a moving vehicle. Like, do you ever have a story where you're like, oh, man, I was in this jam up and we had to go through planes, trains, and automobile.

[Mike]

To just think of, like, being run out on a Sunday, not being able to go to the liquor store, and then, like, having to dig through bizarre places to, like, find one. Like an all banged up dirty tea that was like in my backpack. Having to try to chill that and drink it.

[CJ]

That's extreme as it gets a banged up dirty tea.

[Ryan]

Remember to go into Evans garage and you were hoarding those bourbon barrels.

[Mike]

The bourbon barrels, they went extinct for a good reason because they are terrible, but we treat them like royalty.

[Ben]

Why?

[Mike]

They're very rare.

[Ben]

What's a Bourbon barrel? Oh, that's right.

[Mike]

The original party pack flavors. And when they switched from bourbon barrel to peach, they put. The bourbon barrel ones were super cheap, like five or six bucks. So we bought a ton of them and then saved them because they were so bad we didn't want to drink them.

[Ben]

All right.

[Evan]

And now we don't even drink Twisted anymore, man.

[CJ]

I just think it's so ridiculous, Evan, that you have committed. It's damn near your personality at this. At this point to be like a twisted tea drinker. And they. They don't even. They won't even respond to your messages.

[Mike]

Won't even acknowledge me.

[CJ]

Yeah, Yeah.

[Evan]

I don't know.

[CJ]

I think it's kind of bullshit, but. Hey, Ryan, earlier you mentioned something about trikes and it triggered this thought. But you guys see our buddy Gavin, the three wheeler. Three wheeler gap.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[CJ]

You guys see his last video of going to Trike Fest?

[Ryan]

I haven't watched.

[Ben]

He had been rolling through with like the hot rod. Everyone was probably looking at that thing.

[CJ]

I just pictured Gav being such a trike enthusiast, hanging out with other trike enthusiasts and them just like geeking over his three wheeler and him geeking over other people's three wheelers. And I was like, man, this is just such a culture. Like, like all the people that he was hanging out with. But I. I don't think that we would have been purist and fit in there, but I think we would have had a good time.

[Ben]

Oh, for sure.

[Evan]

Well, it seemed like one thing that blew me away was that they have a couple different runs throughout the weekend. And one of them is like specifically a hardtail run. You have to bring a three wheeler that doesn't have suspension. Oh, like that's that particular ride. Then the other one is a free game, open mod, whatever. I'm like, wow. They have specific runs for specific. Because obviously people come in there aren't are bringing more than one three wheeler.

[Ben]

Where was that at?

[CJ]

I think Indiana or something. Yeah.

[Evan]

Really?

[Ryan]

It was somewhere you think that they would like.

[Ben]

A lot of three wheelers there.

[Ryan]

There was.

[Ben]

Dude, that would have been a lot of fun.

[CJ]

How many collarbones you think got broken? Just in Gab's video, I saw like 14 flips.

[Ryan]

Didn't Gav wad up on the first corner of his race?

[CJ]

Yeah, of course.

[Ben]

He was just so excited. He was just full throttle.

[Mike]

Can't make the turn.

[Ben]

Yeah, they just can't make the turn. But still just cranks. It flips.

[CJ]

I was laughing at that. I was like, honestly, dude, I can't believe that this thing is still in one piece.

[Ben]

I think he's like, very particular about making sure he keeps it nice. Like I, like, I remember when we gave it to him, he's like, I'm not taking it in the mud.

[CJ]

Not.

[Ben]

I'm like, bro, it's a three wheeler. Take it in the mud.

[Mike]

He did swamp it pretty much immediately.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Evan]

Water, unfortunately.

[Ben]

Did he?

[Evan]

Yeah, when we got to Moab.

[Ben]

Oh, yeah. In Moab. Yeah, that's right.

[Evan]

But the water hits the air filter.

[Ben]

Yeah, it's got a bad.

[CJ]

It's a poor design. Poor design for sure. So what do you guys think that those guys would think about our modern day three wheeler? Do you think they're such purists, they would be disgusted.

[Evan]

Some would like. Some would someone.

[CJ]

You know, it's like a rest. Resto. Restro.

[Ryan]

Restomod.

[CJ]

Resto mod.

[Ryan]

I feel like it probably would be pretty similar to the way that CJ feels about the new Ford Ranger. Like he can appreciate some of the new luxuries that it has, but it's just not as good as the old 1999 for Ranger.

[Ben]

Yeah, that's true. I mean, yeah, I guess I don't know how it feels for, for the three wheelers, but I can definitely agree with that.

[CJ]

You know, you'll learn though.

[Ben]

It's all right. Still Ford Ranger, I guess times change.

[CJ]

But you know, me and CJ had a conversation about this yesterday of like, these certain things that we make videos about are such a niche market, right?

[Ryan]

Niche, niche.

[CJ]

Oh, man. You know, it's bad when CJ starts correcting what I'm saying. Holy, I'm getting dumber. But anyway, so like yesterday's vid with like the big wheel dirt bikes, pretty niche, you know, in. Granted, it's a lot of people are probably just like dirt bike, you know, click, click the same. But the big wheel, the three wheelers, all these different things that we like kind of expand out to and make different videos on in like these different markets and sectors of people. It's almost like we are like the thanos of like just grabbing all these collectives of people and just like bringing them into our like, inner circle of like, all right, you click for this and then, and then half the video is that, and then the other half is reckless golfing with our grandpa or blind grandpa, bowling prank or like, you know, so many just random things and then you just hope that they stay for the enjoyment of everything. But you're just like grabbing these like weird things, like weird like niche, niche, niche people from all these different spots. And I think that's like our fan base at this point.

[Ben]

But I think we're making three wheelers were the most popular probably. I'd say like most people know what a three wheeler is, you know, and obviously quads and dirt bikes. But like you start getting into things like the big wheel. It's like a much smaller group of people that are aware of them, let alone enthusiasts. But we like make it more known because now we present it to these people and it oftentimes seems like we're clearing the path of, you know.

[Ryan]

Yeah. Of, like, a space.

[Ben]

Of this space. Because I don't really know if there's anyone else making videos with big wheels that are, you know, like, at this size and doing it at this scale.

[Ryan]

I know. One thing's for sure. We drove the price of smart cars up 100 because we've been trying to get them, and now they're all, like, 10 grand. What the happened?

[Evan]

They're old.

[Ben]

Also, a bunch of other YouTubers got it. Got smart cars after we got them. Like, I remember nobody had them. And we got them because we're like, this is like, the lamest thing. But we're gonna act like it's super cool.

[CJ]

Those things were cool.

[Ben]

And then they end up.

[Evan]

But I actually. Being cool, I guess. Yeah, I forgot about that. We came into it like, yeah, these things are lame. Even after we drove them. They're like.

[Ben]

They're slow, but they were so cheap at the time, and they look so funny. It was like, let's drift them. Let's see if we can, you know, pull the traction control fuse. That way we can drift them, and we'll lift it up, we'll jump them and do all these things.

[Ryan]

And then I forget that we own.

[Ben]

A smart car still sitting on top of Ken's van.

[CJ]

Yeah.

[Evan]

Rocket League was so fun.

[CJ]

The smart cars. The smart cars are like golf carts. They're just kind of like little chicken nuggets, and they're, like, almost indestructible.

[Ben]

I. I wouldn't mind buying one again. It's just. I just know I probably wouldn't drive it as much as I'd like to, you know, Like, I'd have to drive my truck. It's like, I gotta.

[CJ]

I feel the same way.

[Evan]

I would love to have another dude.

[Ben]

I actually got pulled over in the smart car I got for speeding back when, you know, we had it.

[CJ]

Sounds like. I'm not surprised by that.

[Ben]

Well, so, so fast.

[CJ]

Dude's got more speeding tickets than anyone I know.

[Ben]

Yeah, I mean, I. He came up to win. I was like, I bet this is the first time you ever pulled a smart car over. He's like, yep, I actually got let off on that one. So shout out that guy. But no, the thing was just so goddamn slow. I pull out of the driveway, and, like, wherever you're. Whenever you're driving the smart car, you got pedal to the wood the whole time, of course, and you got to run the paddle shifters just to make it shift faster. Cuz otherwise it doesn't rev the gear out enough.

[CJ]

I don't think you have to.

[Ben]

You have to if you're trying to get anywhere. So anyways, like, by the time it got up to speed, but it was such a slow acceleration, it didn't feel like I was going that fast, but I was going like maybe like, you know, 80 and a 40 or something.

[CJ]

That's not that.

[Ben]

Yeah, but I mean, like, you get up to it and then it's like, now you're speeding, but you don't feel like it. And then I'm cruising.

[Evan]

Dude, I. I drove my Smart car to a wedding. Or as I was at the rehearsal. I was in the wedding and I was at the rehearsal dinner. And then driving on my way home from that. I just remember because I got it on video. I'm taking a snap. I'm like wearing my tux or whatever or suit. And then I'm like driving the Smart car. And then my muffler falls off.

[CJ]

What?

[Evan]

Yeah, it's just like you hear like.

[CJ]

Roll down the road.

[Evan]

I'm like, did my muffler just fall off? And I got off to see if I can find.

[Ben]

Yeah, you.

[CJ]

You were probably pretty stoked on it. Like, nice. I didn't even have to cut it. But like, think of the. Think of any other smart car owner and their muffler falls off and now they got a driver on their smart.

[Ben]

It was pretty loud. Do you remember Ken wrapped his. Yeah, he spent like a week wrapping his. And then we're like, now it looks the coolest, so we got to jump it into the pool.

[CJ]

That's right.

[Ryan]

He was pissed.

[Ben]

He.

[Evan]

Anybody took it pretty well for the amount of work that he had into it. Yeah.

[Ryan]

Took a long time. I don't know if Ken's wrapped anything since the.

[Ben]

Has a modded anything since.

[CJ]

Yeah, no kidding. The easy Smart car unload video. Just overlay that right now. That was so slept on of just like how just pointless and reckless it was.

[Ben]

Well, the reason why we did that was because we jumped into the pool water logged and like it was like pretty up. So we're like, well, let's just unload it. Because at the time, that was what we did. Whenever you had junk or if anything was broken, you would unload it out of the back of a truck after going 40 miles per hour in reverse. And for some reason, it sometimes would start to work.

[Ryan]

Oh yeah, that's right.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Got the golf cart to work.

[Ben]

So it'd be a little bent up, but it would Run again.

[Ryan]

What if we launched out of the back of the.

[Evan]

We easy unloaded a golf cart?

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[CJ]

It broke. CJ's four wheeler.

[Ryan]

Yep.

[CJ]

The golf cart.

[Ben]

Grandpa's TV. Grandpa's TV.

[Ryan]

Yep.

[CJ]

Smart car.

[Ryan]

Smart car was probably the pinnacle.

[Ben]

I think that's it. Yeah.

[Ryan]

What do you think? So largest thing we can fit. I mean a smart cars damn near. Yeah.

[Ben]

We do like build ramps for it to sit on. Yeah. Cuz otherwise it wouldn't fit. Yeah.

[CJ]

I don't know what else we could figure that out.

[Evan]

Maybe we'll have to do a few more things.

[Ryan]

We could just get a bigger truck.

[CJ]

Oh, like a dump truck. You could get like a full dump truck.

[Mike]

You just did a sled deck, like a flatbed. Then you'd really get a lot of room and you'd be really high and be destructive.

[CJ]

Somebody say the me the Miata?

[Ryan]

Yeah, Evan did. Which I'm surprised because Evan loves a Miata.

[Mike]

I do love the Miata.

[CJ]

Dude. Evan was mobbing around in the Miata the other day. Red Miata, tops down, hair is flowing. He pulls up, chain out, chain out. And he pulls up and we're just like. I, I think some of us are clapping because it was such a beautiful sight. Like didn't know what else to do. And Mike pulls this line out. One of the best things I've heard you say, Mike. He goes. Looks like he's driving his red Etne because Ev wears red Etne shoes.

[Evan]

It literally did.

[CJ]

And it did. Dude. Maybe it was just the moment, but we all just start laughing and now I can't unsee it.

[Mike]

You know, I want to wrap it like a shoe.

[CJ]

I know that'd be amazing.

[Ben]

All you gotta do is put an A logo on the side and you're pretty much there. I gotta say, Ev, I admire the fact that you still wear a knees proper shoe. We should get you some new ones. Like the ones with the big E on the side though.

[Mike]

I don't. Can't do that.

[Ben]

Like yours are like a little bit more like skaterish. I'm talking like he wants.

[Mike]

You want pro models.

[Ben]

It's quality. I want to get you some like blocks on your feet, you know. What about some bar laces and everything?

[Mike]

Maybe some Osiris's. Bring those.

[CJ]

Yeah.

[Ben]

Did you ever have those?

[Mike]

Oh yeah.

[Ben]

You did actually.

[Mike]

Honestly, Just one pair of like the big classic.

[Ben]

Yeah. With the huge fucking tongue and. God, those things are ugly.

[Mike]

Actually were comfortable.

[Ben]

I'm sure they were.

[Mike]

But like what's the point of those?

[Ben]

You can't skate in those. I mean, code. You could skate in crocs if you want. But, like, were they actually for skating?

[Mike]

I mean, in theory, yeah, But I think it was just a phase that really just rocked them. They had the crazy colors.

[Ben]

What were those one shoes? God, now I can't think of them. They were like that farm. Oh, my God.

[CJ]

I just. Fat farms.

[Ben]

Are they still around?

[CJ]

Ev, pull them up.

[Ben]

Ev doesn't have a computer.

[Ryan]

I can multit.

[Ben]

He doesn't have one in his. In his personal life, and he doesn't have one even back there that we loaned him.

[Mike]

I'm. I'm not sure if fat farm's still a thing.

[Ben]

There was a kid in my class. There was a kid in my class that had fat farms. And they didn't. This is in the second grade, but they didn't make them in children's size. So he was wearing, like a size 8 shoe in the second grade. Like, he was falling out of his feet. And then like, the teacher, you can't go to gym class with those. He's like, yeah. Ken is just. Yep. Fat farms, dude.

[Evan]

Yeah. I would say if you had those back in the day, you were considered cool, but only for like a.

[Ben]

Those are pretty sick. Honestly, I'd wear those today.

[Evan]

Let's bring them back.

[Ben]

Oh, they make them now. What does fat farm even mean?

[Evan]

I don't even know.

[CJ]

Well, fat. So if. If you're fat.

[Ben]

Those are actually pretty slick with a baby fat. I could see, like, was a guy wearing those in Miami with, like, a button up.

[CJ]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure.

[Ryan]

Damn, dude. The fat farm signed by run DMC.

[CJ]

Yeah. Yeah. That's pretty sick much.

[Ryan]

295.

[CJ]

Can't put a price on that.

[Ben]

Let me see if I can order some fat farms.

[Evan]

Everyone go order a vintage shoe right now.

[Ben]

It was always so impractical. It's like you were, like, so careful because you got to. To run the bar laces. You had to, like, have the laces behind your tongue. It's such a pain in the dick.

[Evan]

I remember looking back, why did I do this so much work to lace them.

[CJ]

Yeah, yeah.

[Ben]

And then it's like, you don't want to get them messed up.

[Mike]

And putting two sets of laces to get the colors, but then having so much lace.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[CJ]

And then packing the lace inside the shoe so you're just walking on them.

[Ben]

You, like, would try to, like. I'd try to stuff it, like, under the sole and stuff. But then it's like you're walking on this Bumpy little. Yeah.

[Mike]

Slide your foot in and like the laces get tangled up in your toes. Terrible.

[Ryan]

Yeah, we didn't have that at my private school. Everybody just wore.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[CJ]

What was everyone wearing there? Birkenstocks?

[Ben]

Boat shoes.

[Ryan]

Yeah, we were at time Sperries and I'm sure.

[CJ]

Did you have a uniform?

[Ryan]

Yeah, in elementary school.

[Ben]

God.

[CJ]

Can I.

[Ryan]

Can you pop up a picture of me? Brag.

[Mike]

Did you have to wear a tie?

[Ryan]

No, dude, you.

[Evan]

Like when Ben asked you to pop up a picture of you in a uniform, you were like.

[CJ]

Of me?

[Ryan]

Gulp. Of me.

[CJ]

Ryan, I think that you should start wearing transitions again.

[Ryan]

Someone had such a good idea. Transitions, Contacts. So when you walk out in the sun, they get darker. So. Yeah. Always wearing sunglasses.

[Evan]

You would look creepy as hell.

[CJ]

Yeah, I like it. I like it.

[Evan]

I would wear them, but you, you're. Yeah. Your eyes are just black.

[Ryan]

Yeah, I didn't think about that, but it'd be fine.

[CJ]

I wish I knew. Transition, Ryan.

[Ryan]

Why? So you can make fun of them?

[Evan]

Probably.

[CJ]

I don't know. I just don't even know him.

[Ryan]

Let's put it this way. Me, Justin and Ken, best friends, we rode around in Ken's Impreza because Ken was old, so he had his license. We would go to the movies a lot because that was the only thing we could do. But we would, like, we'd go to the movie at 8 and then we'd leave here at like 4, and then we'd just drive around and we'd go to the Chinese restaurant, eat a ton of ice cream.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[CJ]

Right when. Right when we started hanging out, you were kind of going through this phase of like going downtown and being a bad boy and like yelling like very aggressive things.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[CJ]

Out the window at people, like walking from bar to bar. And I remember going with you one night. Yeah.

[Evan]

You, like, take.

[Ryan]

There's a bit of culture and like.

[CJ]

People obviously don't take kindly to like a 15 year old calling them a pussy.

[Evan]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

We saw two guys walking down the street and now, knowing what I know, yelling at people at like 11:45 downtown Fargo, like, everybody's walking from bar to bar still hammered, and there was two guys wearing affliction T shirts. Who knows? Could have been Mark and kids.

[Evan]

No.

[Ryan]

And I just. We probably call them or something like that. And they chased us through downtown.

[Ben]

I would, as a guy with an affliction shirt, would exactly. Run after a car.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[CJ]

So. So did you. Did you guys take off or what?

[Ryan]

Yeah, we took off and Blake was driving and I remember he Panicked. Panicked. And I think we ended up getting jammed up at a light. We just rolled up the windows.

[CJ]

That's what I'd imagine would happen. You would get one block down and you hit the first red light sitting there. No tint. Rolled the window up.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Mike]

Just keep looking forward. Pretend they're not pounding on the window.

[Evan]

This one time in elementary school, this, like, pretty much bully was chasing me and my buddy Chris. Like, we were pretty small, but we were kind of heckling him, and we're just walking home from school.

[Ryan]

Oh, so you deserved it.

[Evan]

And we were carrying our sleds like saucers. He's like, hey, you know, get over here. Because we were like, kind of heckling him and we're like, oh, he's actually coming after us. Like, he's, you know, he's gonna, like, throw us down or some shit. And we threw our sleds behind us like, you know, as like a decoy. All right, throw your sled.

[Ben]

Run.

[Evan]

And he slipped on the sled, like, full blown, you know. Woo. Like, airborne to the back in the middle of an. Like an intersection, like small town. So no one was driving, but just on his back and we're like, we.

[CJ]

Got him and he kept running. Yeah.

[Ben]

Oh, my God, the sledge.

[CJ]

And then the next day at school, they beat the.

[Evan]

We beat the.

[Ben]

Out of him.

[CJ]

No, he beat the.

[Evan]

I was like, he's like twice our size.

[Ben]

Mike was a bully, though, in high school.

[CJ]

Yeah.

[Ben]

Or middle school or.

[Evan]

I just. It was trickled down.

[Ben]

So I got to say he was bowling the hierarchy. Mike got beat up first period, but second period, he wouldn't kick someone else.

[Ryan]

But just with a little less creativity than the original bully.

[Ben]

Yeah, yeah.

[CJ]

One time I got pushed down to the ground in fourth grade by, like, the local bully.

[Ben]

Wasn't his name like Reed or something?

[CJ]

Ray.

[Ben]

Ray, that's right. Yeah. You name your kid Ray? Yeah, he's gonna be a bully.

[Mike]

Really?

[Evan]

Yeah, bro.

[Ryan]

I think Ray is a super fruity name.

[Evan]

I can't think of anyone.

[Ben]

Ray is like, he's gonna be overweight. He's gonna be just like Rudy.

[Ryan]

Well, there I could have Ray.

[CJ]

When I think of a Ray, I think of, like, Ricky's dad from trailer.

[Mike]

Yeah, yeah.

[CJ]

Like tattoos, but weathered tattoos. I just went to rip sleeve, so not a. Not a cut off, but, like ripped. So you can still see that. It's like, you know, he's strong enough to tear him off himself. Probably bald and. And just. Just an.

[Ben]

So is this what the kid looked like when in the Fourth grade.

[CJ]

Yeah. Yeah, he had like the fake purser.

[Ben]

So why do you push you to the ground? Why do you. I remember hearing about this at the time it happened like it was like. Yeah, been just gone up because you got beat up at recess.

[CJ]

Yeah, it was at recess.

[Ben]

Yeah, I remember it.

[CJ]

I don't really remember the content.

[Ben]

What'd you do to like, why would he go after you?

[CJ]

I don't know. I'm trying to think of that.

[Ben]

You were probably, you were really small. Ben was really, really smart.

[CJ]

I could have been running my mouth, but that doesn't sound like something I would do.

[Ben]

I could see it. So he just shoved you or did he hit you or what?

[CJ]

I was running, I was running trying to get away from him and he pushed me and it was on like asphalt.

[Mike]

Oh, you were still talking as you were.

[Ben]

Did you start crying?

[CJ]

Probably.

[Ben]

Did you start crying?

[CJ]

I don't, no, that's, did you just.

[Ben]

Get up and go to class or did you have to go to the nurse?

[Evan]

No.

[CJ]

And then I had to go to the nurse's office and I was like gushing blood like everywhere. Really? Really.

[Ben]

Do you guys ever just like you'd be at school that day, this was mostly, I guess elementary school would be, but like say you're at, you're at class, you're just like, like, I really don't want to be here. This is boring. You're looking at the time. You're like, let's see, maybe I can get out of this. So you go to the nurse's office. You're like, I don't feel very good then. No.

[CJ]

Yeah, I thought that was, I did that.

[Evan]

I thought that was only in cartoons.

[Ben]

No, I, I, I do that in real life and sometimes it works, sometimes it wouldn't. You just go home, you have your parents come pick you up just because.

[Evan]

You just didn't want to be there.

[Ben]

Like you were sick for the rest of the day. So it was a pain because I need to lay in your bed and watch tv.

[Evan]

I could never bring myself to like, call into work just cuz like I, whenever I was surrounded by people that do that, just. Yeah, why don't you just call in, tell them you're sick? And I'm like, that's lying. They're like, so I'm like, they need me, they need my help.

[Ben]

I, I way different than elementary versus having a job. Yeah, when I had a job, I was like, yeah, I just, when I worked for, let's say at the gym or even at, when I washed Cars. I was like their go to guy. Which I kind of almost made an issue for myself because I'd always say yes. If they called me, hey, we're short a guy. We need you. I'd always show up.

[Evan]

That's. I mean, if you're working at, like a restaurant and there was only like five people on the staff on a slow night.

[Ben]

It's pretty inconsiderate, though, if you just, like, ditch out and then someone else. It was supposed to be their day or they're not supposed to be working right there. So then they were maybe had something planned, and then they end up calling them, for instance, me in some cases. Then it's like, okay, I guess, and you have to, like, cancel whatever you were doing. You go in.

[CJ]

It's also probably just comes down to, like, the type of person they are. If they're cool with just calling in, lying, being like, yeah, I'm sick.

[Ben]

Yeah, like, those people aren't. Aren't the guy.

[CJ]

Or like, I'm not. I'm not feeling good, but they're just hung over. Like, something like that.

[Evan]

I mean, I think it's like, it's a lot deeper than just, like, calling, you know, it's like it reflects on the type of person you are.

[CJ]

Right.

[Ryan]

I used to go to my jobs hungover a lot. I never do it here anymore.

[Ben]

He just stays drinking on the job.

[Ryan]

But when I would. I was the Saturday. Actually, I wasn't the Saturday manager. I was the nighttime manager pretty quickly at the car wash that I worked at. And I would always show up hungover when I had to work Saturdays. It was pretty slick.

[Evan]

You.

[Ryan]

You show up and then you just go sit in a car you're supposed to be detailing and take a nap.

[CJ]

Really?

[Ryan]

I mean, you wouldn't, like, just straight up zonk out, but, like, you would, like, wipe the dash a little bit and lay back and pretend that you're cleaning something on the floor for a bit.

[Evan]

That's so funny.

[CJ]

Ryan brings like, a pillow and sleeping bag, opens up the trunk, crawls in.

[Ryan]

When I used to work. Yeah, yeah. What's he doing? When I used to work landscaping, I was even younger yet. I was like 19, 20. And after drinking too many soda pops all night, one time I was so tired and hungover, we were laying flagstone pavers. You're on your hands and knees, like, moving rocks. And I basically was so tired that my head just went down and I fell asleep on the rock.

[Ben]

Wow.

[Ryan]

Face down like that. Like, my boss came over and thought I Was, like, dead. I was just, like, face down. He woke.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

And I was like, oh, shit. Sorry. That was probably the worst at work nap I've had.

[Ben]

My hangover advice is, you gotta just keep moving. You gotta get up, you gotta get going, you know? Yeah.

[Ryan]

Well, Bert Kreischer's thing is punish yourself.

[Evan]

Right?

[Ryan]

Like, he says. He's like, you chose this.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

Get up, work out, make yourself feel better, and then get going.

[Ben]

Which I agree. Yeah.

[Ryan]

Sometimes it's just so damn hard, though.

[Ben]

I think it lasts longer, though, if you lay around. Like, it's like a band aid. You gotta, like, you have to get up, get moving, rip that off, start drinking again or stop drinking again, but either way, you got to get going.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Evan]

You know, I think the worst part is, go figure. This is different than laying around. Like, I can sleep it off. I can just sleep.

[Ben]

We know that when you're not hungover, you. You couldn't even been drinking. You'd sleep it off.

[Evan]

Yeah, I can sleep.

[Ryan]

Is anyone else here?

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Mike]

Big, big wrench has some.

[Ben]

Oh, okay.

[Ryan]

Is it bringing kid to work today?

[CJ]

Yeah, everyone.

[Evan]

We'll do the rest of the podcast.

[Ben]

Whispering, then has his children.

[CJ]

I. I think the. The hardest part about most hangovers is they're usually on a Sunday. And then it's. It's paired with the Sunday scaries of just, like, now you're sitting back hungover, reflecting on the decisions that you made the last two days, and then you're thinking about the decisions that you gotta make for the next five days to get through, like, the week. And it's like, oh, this is not good, dude.

[Ben]

If it means anything to the people at home, we. At least I have the Sunday scaries.

[Ryan]

Oh, yeah.

[Ben]

And, like, you would think we wouldn't, but, like, it's just a normal thing.

[Ryan]

Yeah, it is. Everybody goes through it.

[CJ]

Yeah.

[Ben]

So you're not alone on that.

[Ryan]

Ev has this show that he likes to watch mainly when he's going to bed after drinking. But I feel like it's also definitely on in the mornings. It's like EV's hangover cure. It's called Carts of Darkness. It's a very obscure YouTube documentary, and funny. It works. I saw this video, and this is some real carts of darkness shit right here.

[Mike]

I get absolutely bodied.

[Ben]

Oh, no. Oh, I don't know if I want to watch this. They just sent him into a wall, don't they?

[CJ]

There's just no way this goes well. No.

[Ben]

What the were they doing?

[Ryan]

I mean, there was definitely no positive outcome to that, bro.

[Ben]

That's worse than anything jackass did. They used to do that with the carts where they'd, like, push them and then hit the curb and they'd go into a bush. That right there was bad.

[CJ]

That was just dumb.

[Ryan]

There was. Yeah, there was no good.

[Ben]

Just concrete.

[Evan]

I still. I still think I'd rather do that than be strapped to a rocket like Johnny Knoxville.

[Ben]

That. Yeah, when Johnny does the Rocky, he goes to the water, bro.

[Evan]

I still think I'd rather.

[Ryan]

Straight to the concrete.

[Evan]

He did a front flip.

[Mike]

I take the rocket to Micah. You're insane if you think that's, like 30 miles an hour. Just slam into the straight to the car face.

[Evan]

But if you go fast enough, you do a full front flip.

[Ryan]

No, no, I don't think that's how that works.

[Ben]

Might have gotten lucky. I see what you're saying. He might have fully flipped and then landed on his back before he hit that.

[CJ]

So you only broke his back.

[Ryan]

It's kind of like you don't just.

[Evan]

Break your bone as soon as it touches a concrete. It's a maybe scone.

[Ben]

Yeah. Oh, brother. For sure.

[Mike]

Three times.

[Ryan]

It's kind of like saying if you clip the guardrail on the interstate with your car fast enough, you can do a barrel roll. That was your logic right there.

[CJ]

Yeah, but you were like, you have to move.

[Evan]

You would have to move into it extremely, extremely fast. Sideways.

[Ryan]

But you're using some sort. Excuse me. Some fricked term of. Term of logic to try to figure out that you're like, no, I would feel safer than this because I'm just going to do a front flip.

[CJ]

Lip.

[Evan]

Yeah. If I'm just. I would rather do exactly what he did than strap myself to the rocket.

[Ben]

You're not even strapped. You're just holding on to the rocket, and you just go into the.

[Evan]

Well, then he like.

[Ben]

It's not much different than you jumping a bike off into the.

[Evan]

Have to get his, like, urethra replaced after that.

[Ben]

No, that was from a dirt bike accident.

[Evan]

Oh.

[Ben]

Try to do a backflip on the bike. Landed on.

[CJ]

Something did happen with the rocket, though. The rocket. The rocket exploded, but it exploded, like, I want to say, like, six inches away from his. Oh, yeah. Lager head or something.

[Ben]

So it was almost super bad chest, I think.

[CJ]

But yeah, Mike, that one just makes no sense.

[Ben]

I'm sorry.

[Ryan]

Well, at least now we know.

[Evan]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

When we. A rocket, we got ev. And when we want to push our. Our friend downhill in a shopping cart, we got. Mike.

[Mike]

We do have a Couple carts down there if you want to run it, Mike.

[CJ]

Well, luckily for Mike, we don't have a single hill in the corm run area.

[Mike]

Do have a few machines that could generate speed though.

[Evan]

And we do have a mechanic that can build us a rocket.

[CJ]

Banshee bungee. Oh my. Banshee bungee. Into a wall. Wait a minute. Now that's.

[Mike]

Has anyone. Wait a shopping cart yet.

[Ben]

How the would you do that? On the board? Just the metal grate somehow is just floating on.

[Mike]

If you go fast enough, it should skip.

[Ben]

I'd agree with that. Very, very high speed. Did you guys see in the last video? Actually, a lot of people are commenting. The top comment is that we have to water skip the big wheel.

[Mike]

It's impossible.

[Ben]

Yeah, I don't really think it. It definitely has more surface area, but I don't think it would be easier.

[Mike]

No. And 250F so power to skip in the first place. And then that one.

[Ben]

Big wheels.

[Ryan]

Do you think the big tire would help though?

[Ben]

More surface, maybe wood.

[Mike]

Yeah. Probably make you paddling for a second. But to like actually skip successfully, there's no way you could like skip across a puddle.

[CJ]

Maybe.

[Ryan]

I've seen you do that on a normal bike.

[Mike]

You have to sink this 250F.

[Evan]

Nope.

[Ben]

That's a pretty nice bike. Even though it's not Evans anymore, he still is emotionally attached to it.

[Mike]

I don't get too emotionally connected to that one.

[CJ]

Really?

[Ben]

No.

[Mike]

It's not a two stroke.

[Ryan]

It's not as ktm, two strokes.

[Mike]

On the other hand, there's a special bond you form with them.

[Ben]

Surprised you don't have that sleeping in the. In the bed with you.

[Mike]

It's hard to fit through the door.

[Ryan]

Do we need to build you a bigger room? Is that what you're asking for right now?

[Mike]

A couple notches on each side of the door frame for the handlebars to go through.

[Ben]

I'm pretty funny.

[Ryan]

Didn't Slim put his his bike in his basement?

[Mike]

Yeah, he puts it in the basement every winter.

[Evan]

And then he domed his wife riding.

[Mike]

It out kind of to make space in the garage for vehicles. It has to go somewhere. He's got room in the basement. Looks cool and it looks cool.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Ben]

You shine it up and it's clean and it's kind of like this fucking sick.

[Mike]

And I think he does like, you know, like a full service on it. Pulls everything apart really? Over the winter.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[CJ]

I kind of want to put some stuff in my house.

[Ben]

You should put a dirt bike in your house, dude. That'd be sick.

[CJ]

You don't have furniture.

[Mike]

You should just put everything that shouldn't be in a house.

[Ryan]

You can put your three wheeler.

[Ben]

You get a smart car put upstairs.

[CJ]

Yeah, I kind of like that idea.

[Ben]

Then it'll feel like the shop at your house.

[CJ]

That'd be great.

[Ryan]

Didn't. Didn't Slim kind of go, like, medium viral for that when he drove it up the stairs and smoked his head?

[Mike]

That video went crazy. Yeah, I never successfully made it. That was. That was the last one. Yeah. This last year, you just drug it out of the basement. Didn't try to ride it again.

[Ryan]

Was Stacy, his wife, pissed when she came home and there was burnout marks on the stairs?

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Mike]

Yeah. I mean, she claims to be pissed, but I don't think she was too mad. It's whatever got over it. Yeah.

[Ben]

Respect to Slim for doing a burnout up his stairs in his house.

[Ryan]

Yeah. It's so legit.

[Ben]

You got turned to boom. Smoked his head on.

[CJ]

It was like the little double whammy, too.

[Mike]

The little bean on the top of his hat. Just smoked is.

[Ben]

Oh, Slim, dude, I love.

[CJ]

I love that he cares enough to put his dirt bike inside because he cares so much about the bike.

[Ben]

Well, some people, but he's about their stuff, Ben.

[CJ]

But he's okay with riding up the stairs and, like, destroying the flooring downstairs on the stairs upstairs. Probably dented the ceiling.

[Ben]

Way harder to replace than just, like, your bike being cold.

[Ryan]

We should go back and notch out a slim head siiz hole in his stairway right there so he can do it successfully.

[Ben]

I miss that guy.

[Ryan]

Me too.

[CJ]

Yeah, we got to get him up here. Down here. We're south over North Wood, straight, straight over.

[Ryan]

I actually have kind of a bit of, like, an OCD thing about that. People will be like, oh, I'm headed.

[Evan]

I got that.

[Ryan]

I'm headed down to Minnesota from you. And they're like, coming up. I. Rich said it.

[Evan]

Our.

[Ryan]

Our buddy who builds tracks, he goes, yeah, I finally made it down here. And I was like, rich, you drove 1500 miles straight north.

[CJ]

This is up.

[Ben]

I think we're used to saying down, because typically, anywhere we go is technically down.

[Ryan]

Wherever we're at, up to Canada.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

100% go out west.

[Evan]

Yeah.

[Ben]

True.

[Evan]

I would never say we're going down to Canada.

[Ben]

That'd just be weird.

[Evan]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

So when you're at home, correct your friends, they love it. I correct my friends all the time, and they tell me how much they like.

[CJ]

It's probably one of my favorite things about you, actually. Ryan.

[Evan]

It's my favorite thing about everyone. Everyone's so good about making sure that we're, you know, just being better.

[Ryan]

Acutely aware of us being idiots.

[CJ]

What do you guys think about Elon Musk and Mark Zuckerberg potentially doing an MMA fight?

[Ben]

No chance.

[Evan]

I think it's only too good to be true.

[Ryan]

Yeah, I don't think they're going to do it, but for the sake of the story, I did see that the France government is offered up the, like, Coliseum. Coliseum for which would be fucking legit. They should fight to the death.

[Ben]

Isn't amazing. The time we live in, like, no other time in history was like, let's get the two richest men on the planet and have them fight each other.

[Ryan]

Yes.

[Ben]

They'll do it in space.

[Ryan]

They'll do it in space.

[CJ]

Oh, man, that would be incredible.

[Mike]

Yeah, but then we Titanic.

[Ryan]

I. I feel like they're more space guys than ocean guys.

[CJ]

I know it's crazy, but, like, I wouldn't be that surprised if it happened. Yeah, bro.

[Ben]

I. I mean, it makes sense because Elon's cool. And Mark actually trains jiu jitsu, which is quite different than boxing, but. But it does seem like he's about it. If he goes to jiu jitsu competitions, he's clearly not afraid of getting hurt.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Ben]

Because you can get slammed down and whatever else, and you might just do.

[Ryan]

It for the culture.

[Ben]

I just don't foresee it happening, man. Like, their brains are, like, their most important things. You think they're gonna box each other? I mean, if they do it.

[CJ]

Crazy.

[Ben]

I hope they do. That'd be so. You are right. So cool and so funny. It'd probably be the biggest boxing event.

[Ryan]

I feel like everybody would watch.

[Ben]

Quite possibly in the world.

[CJ]

It would be 100 because it's.

[Ben]

Dude, it was strange and, like, it's tying in everyone. Because it's not just two boxers that only boxing fans know. It's, you know, moguls of the world.

[CJ]

Dana wants to be, like, the promoter. Put it on.

[Ben]

Of course.

[Ryan]

Yeah, he does.

[CJ]

Yeah. And anyway, it was a clip of him being like, these boxers coming together, trying to make a show. But this is just stupid. Like, two people that shouldn't be fighting each other shouldn't be entertainment. Then the next gut is. Yeah. So I just got off the phone with Mark Zuckerberg and Elon Musk. Sounds like they're both interested in fighting, so hopefully we can make this happen.

[Ryan]

Yeah. The only way to never be wrong is never say anything.

[CJ]

Never say anything.

[Ben]

Yeah, that's true.

[CJ]

No, I, I think honestly, though, like, crazy things have happened, and I wouldn't be that surprised.

[Ben]

Yeah, I, I'd agree. But going off of what Ryan said, his statement about never say anything because then you can never be wrong. So I, like, recently I've been, like, trying to get back into working out all this. I'm looking at these, like, health bands and whatever that, like, track your health, you know, so you can do, like, a whoop or a Fitbit or even, Even the Apple watch, possibly. Oh, so with the Whoop, you gotta, like, pay a monthly thing and same with, like, the other brands. I think there's a ring that you can do as well.

[Ryan]

Oh, yeah.

[Ben]

And I just had to immediately be like, well, can't do the Apple watch. I talk too much shit on them.

[CJ]

Yeah, that'd be a tough look.

[Ben]

Yeah, I can't go back on. But it would be, it would be nice, though, to have it just to monitor my health. That's the only reason I want it, just so I could see it. Watches your sleep. Doesn't it like that?

[Evan]

But it is funny because I don't work out, I don't hit the gym. So, like, all the fitness stuff that, that they're compact with is just useless to me. No, it counts. My.

[Ryan]

You guys could share.

[Mike]

Just. Just envision the activities Mike's doing and what the watch.

[CJ]

What's he doing? Ev. I don't even.

[Ben]

Oh, wow.

[Ryan]

35 minutes on the Shakeway today.

[Evan]

It says that. Yeah, when I'm, like, out dirt biking, it shakes around and it goes. You record outdoor cycle. And I'm like, it's counting all these calories.

[Ryan]

And yeah, it's like, man, this guy.

[Ben]

So maybe it's not as accurate. That's one thing, dude. I was looking at the watch. The Apple watch seems more versatile because it actually can do a few more other things that I probably wouldn't use.

[Ryan]

But tells you the time cheaper.

[Ben]

You don't have to pay a subscription. No, it's just a little band. And I, I was looking, I was like, God, I'm not gonna wear this thing everywhere. It looks kind of lame.

[Ryan]

Our buddy around here, he wears a nice watch. And then so he got the whoop band because I was like, he's. He was like, I had an Apple Watch, but I can't wear two watches.

[Evan]

The day CJ gets a workout band is when Rolex makes one.

[Ben]

No, I, I. Yeah, that's actually a good point. I'd rather just wear the rolly in there.

[Ryan]

I think I do the ring one.

[CJ]

So personal.

[Ben]

Yeah. I just don't seem like a ring guy.

[CJ]

But.

[Ryan]

No, but then if you're like, oh, it tells me that I slept good last night.

[Ben]

Do I wear it on my pinky?

[Ryan]

No, I think, like, I think it's your index, maybe, or middle.

[Mike]

So whether it tells you you slept good or you slept bad, what usefulness is that information?

[CJ]

That's a good point.

[Mike]

All the stuff it tells you is irrelevant. It makes you feel better because, like, you can prove that you did something today, that you didn't just sit on your ass. But I think all they do is make people feel good. They're a waste of money and time.

[CJ]

You're.

[Ryan]

You're right.

[CJ]

Such a great point.

[Ben]

You're right.

[CJ]

Such a fantastic point.

[Ryan]

I would just wake up and go, last night you drank 12 teas before bed in order to sleep better. Don't drink 12 teas before bed. I don't want to know that.

[Ben]

I did kind of come to that. That realization. I was like, I mean, I probably know what I need to do if I want to get better sleep or whatever. But I. I was just interested in seeing, you know, I guess the data.

[Ryan]

I saw somebody on the boat this other weekend and they had a, like a very noticeable tan line from a whoop band. And I was like, oh, you, like, wear it a lot. Like, whatever. Did you like it? Because I was looking into it. And he goes, yeah, I wore it straight for two years. And he goes, I got so dialed. I know exactly what the band's gonna tell me. Don't eat after 8 o'.

[Evan]

Clock.

[Ryan]

Don't have this type of food. Like, make sure you exercise.

[CJ]

It tells you that.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Ben]

Wow. Now I'm more interested.

[Mike]

You need someone to tell you not.

[Ben]

To eat a snack before bed.

[CJ]

No, yeah, you're right.

[Ben]

I do know that you're right.

[CJ]

I do.

[Ben]

When I go and I grab a cookie at 10 o' clock at night, I know I shouldn't be. And then I go back for the second. I know. I know for a fact. I'm like, this is not good.

[Evan]

I was like, I need a device ball.

[Mike]

And just ask that what to do.

[Ben]

I have one of those. I actually do have a ball from when I was a kid.

[Ryan]

Really?

[Ben]

Yeah, of course, bro. Those things are sick.

[CJ]

EVs like, yeah. So my whoop band's been pissing me off. Told me I was unhealthy yesterday.

[Ryan]

Oh, yeah, I.

[Ben]

And I. I was just pissed because I had a great day. I sat at the bar from 12 to 12.

[Mike]

That's a shift.

[CJ]

Ryan, a couple podcasts ago, you were. You were saying how with me and cj, we. We stick to our. Our word, right? And I said, yeah, it's all fun and games until it gets you in a sticky position. Uhhuh. C.J. right here. He's in a sticky position.

[Ben]

I'm not jammed up.

[CJ]

Well, yeah, but you.

[Ben]

You.

[CJ]

You just.

[Ben]

I know. I can't do that.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[Ben]

I It out.

[CJ]

If you do that and somebody takes a picture of you at the gym and it gets leaked, bro.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

You maybe want a little.

[CJ]

I'll do it. I'll do it. I would take advantage.

[Ben]

You guys would. Yeah. 100% clip it.

[Ryan]

That's why I pick 100%.

[CJ]

100%, I think.

[Ryan]

But if you really full circle, you could go, listen, I started looking into the benefits like you did, and you go, I found a usefulness for it. Now, I didn't think it was cool to get my text messages on my phone and wear it as an accessory piece, which is what you thought, but you go, now I found this usefulness.

[CJ]

Yeah.

[Evan]

But, I mean, I feel like you have to live under a damn rock to not know an Apple watch tracks your fitness.

[Ben]

I didn't know how.

[Evan]

And that's the first thing they did.

[Ben]

I just thought it came out steps. Like, I was. I don't really care about you guys. Remember those? Those are pretty cool.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Ben]

Put on your waistband.

[Evan]

Yeah. You get them in gym?

[Ben]

Yeah. I had one because my mom had one, so I was like, can I wear it sometimes? And then she probably wore it for a week, and then I got to wear it.

[CJ]

When I was in. In college for the short stint, I took health class. And part of the health class was you had to get 10,000 steps every single day. And then you had to submit basically, like a screenshot or some kind of form showing that you got 10,000 steps. Right? Well, I wasn't getting 10,000 steps, and I wasn't gonna. About to go to the track and do it, so I just got really good at just Photoshopping it.

[Ryan]

That's where I learned to Photoshop. You cut in the top of the screen and you put in the bottom so it shows your steps.

[CJ]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

So every week I had the same amount of steps.

[CJ]

Do you guys remember Power Balance bands?

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Ben]

Yeah, bro. And then they came out that it was a sham.

[CJ]

Fake, and they sold.

[Evan]

Them for, like 20 to 30 bucks, depending on which one you got.

[Ryan]

You ever have a kid that was like, they bought the fake ones and then would sell those for 15 or so.

[Evan]

Whatever, everything.

[Ben]

It's just so mental, dude. That's what it was.

[Evan]

All mental. But no, it was weird. You go into Shields and the salesman would, like, do the test with you. And they'd be like, see?

[Ryan]

Yep.

[Evan]

Isn't that cool? You gotta have one.

[Ben]

Yeah, they put it on and then. No, they'd. They'd be like, all right, stand here. And then they'd like, push you back. Yeah, just like, hardly. And you'd like, take a step back and then they'd put it on you. And then they do it again. But obviously now you're expecting it. So you're like, you're gonna add a little resistance when it comes. And then you're like, wow, see, look, Gravity.

[CJ]

Ever since I need this, ever since I got this power balance band, I haven't gotten blown over in the wind once.

[Evan]

But it's like, yeah. And then people would. They would, you know, if a buddy did that to you, they're like, oh, yeah, I could see that. But then if the salesman at Shields does that to you, you're like, well, the salesman said that. So, like, obviously, fuck was that guy.

[Ben]

Getting out of it? He was just calling a bunch of people and he's just like, was he getting a commission off those things or what?

[CJ]

Yeah, sure. But, you know, you always got to wonder if you should be buying something from a guy that rolls up on a Segway.

[Ben]

That's true. They are bad news.

[Mike]

Did you know the guy that invented the Segway died because he drove it off the Grand Canyon? What? We should fact check this. That is the story I heard.

[Ryan]

No, on accident, I would.

[Mike]

As far as I know, he didn't leave a note.

[Ryan]

When you search up, how did the inventor. That's the first thing that comes up. Okay. Jimmy Held Zin didn't invent the segue, but he was the company's owner when he tumbled off a cliff while riding an all terrain Segway.

[CJ]

Oh, that's not a good look. Okay, so it wasn't the Grand Canyon. No.

[Evan]

At least, dude, he was about it.

[Ryan]

Close enough.

[Evan]

He was about it. He was riding his Segway Saturday around the Grand Canyon and fell in. That's on that note.

[CJ]

Man, that's tough. What about the little Amazon Segways? Like the foot Segways without the big stick in the handlebars?

[Ben]

I feel like the stick is a lot cooler with the handlebars. It just looks more official.

[CJ]

Like a mall cop.

[Ben]

Yeah, like the mall cops were all strapped with those things. There's something about when you're on that thing, it just demands, like, you know, you're the. I was going to say respect. And you have authority. Like, that's what it. It just yells out at everyone, like, I'm in authority.

[CJ]

CJ Starts rolling around the shop on a segue.

[Mike]

I could see Ken having one.

[Ryan]

He's riding around the merch B, but that's another foot and a half taller.

[Evan]

Driving around a Segway. I feel like you should be giving orders.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Evan]

People.

[CJ]

Ken would roll around on the Segway with the stick and the bars, and then all of his minions would be rolling around with just like the Amazon Segway. This is so much more efficient.

[Evan]

It's like a duck, a mother's dog.

[CJ]

Them in at night, every other strappy chips. And we walk back there and there's stripes on the ground. Everyone's like, got their own lanes.

[Ben]

You can only. Closer to Wally.

[CJ]

You can only fit half the amount of shelving in there. But it's so much more efficient.

[Evan]

It would crash every day. You had to fulfill orders on a hoverboard.

[Mike]

Yeah.

[CJ]

I could actually see it, though. Be like a one wheel. It'd be like one wheeling around. That'd be like the. The cool mall cop rolls up like the skater cop.

[Ryan]

Yo, what up, fellas?

[CJ]

What up, fellas? What's going on here?

[Ryan]

I do have a bit of a question to pose for you guys. We talked about it before, and. And I just had this new realization. You know, we talked about girls and only fans and if you would let your girlfriend have an only fans or if you would encourage it, and it. It came to me. Are guys that are dating onlyfans girls? Cucky.

[Evan]

Yeah.

[Mike]

It depends on the content.

[Ben]

Like you're. Depends on the.

[Ryan]

Are they your girls out there posting bikini or less and you're promoting it and you're like, commenting like, so hot, babe.

[Ben]

I don't think.

[CJ]

Here's the thing, Ryan. I don't think so. I think they're just after the money.

[Ben]

They're hustling, man. Yeah.

[Ryan]

I mean, it's just your girlfriend, you aren't getting any cash out of that, so it's going into your bank.

[Ben]

Oh, she's paying for all your shit. You're in a free ride. Yeah.

[Mike]

Be taking a cut or if it's your wife.

[CJ]

I think cocky.

[Ben]

That's when you.

[CJ]

Cocky just seems kind of aggressive.

[Ryan]

That's. It is an aggressive term.

[Ben]

That'd be like for a guy that's dating a porn star, possibly. But that's the same thing. It's work, man.

[Ryan]

But like, maybe those guys, like, kind of like their girlfriend being like admired by a bunch of other people. Everybody wants a hot girlfriend, but nobody else wants to get in the way of them and their hot girlfriend.

[CJ]

But okay, what do you do you think?

[Ryan]

I think so.

[Evan]

I think so.

[Ryan]

I think so.

[Evan]

I don't love the word though. Like, I don't know.

[Ben]

It's not that fun when you listen to like podcast. Like, like I'll listen to no Jumper and sometimes they'll have like the porn stars on. I know Evan listens to them. Seems like oftentimes these porn star, you know, the gal and then the guy they have like, they're just like open, like they can do whatever.

[Ryan]

Yeah. So that's maybe the extreme.

[Ben]

Maybe like, you know, both ends. It's not.

[Ryan]

Well, my street, your friend Peter and his girlfriend Tiffany, they. She's got an only fans. A couple thousand people subscribe to it. Doing pretty solid, you know, Makes a couple grand a month. He really loves it. He's like, it's cool. He's posting her pictures on his story. And again, check out my hot girlfriend posting nudes on OnlyFans.

[Ben]

He's probably getting a cut at that point.

[Evan]

Point.

[CJ]

Okay. There probably is some guys that do like that or. Or like that their girlfriend is being admired. But I would imagine that a lot of times it's either about the money or they're just not stoked on it.

[Ben]

If you got no one hitting on your chick, then maybe she's not that pretty.

[Ryan]

That's what I'm saying. Like everybody wants, yeah. Other people to think their girlfriend's hot, but nobody wants the other guys to tell their girlfriend that they think that they're hot.

[Ben]

Yeah, I'd say everyone wants to date a hot chick.

[Ryan]

Yeah.

[Ben]

No one wants the hot. You know, the like. The problem with dating a hot chick is everyone thinks she's hot. And then, you know, you're gonna have guys trying to make some moves.

[Evan]

You're gonna be walking around with clenched fists all the time.

[Ben]

Yeah. What are you gonna do? Fight everyone that looks her way. And there's guys.

[CJ]

There is guys like that.

[Ben]

Yeah.

[Ryan]

And stay out of their way.

[Ben]

Yeah. No kidding. What a stupid thing to get in a fight about.

[Ryan]

Well, there we go. I'm honestly intrigued on other people's thoughts on that.

[CJ]

Have you got a street fight over a chick? Didn't you?

[Mike]

I was like 19, but yes.

[Ryan]

Well, shit, fellas. I hope everybody had a great fourth of July.

[CJ]

We are about to.

[Ryan]

And we'll be back next Tuesday with another fresh podcast.

[CJ]

Absolutely. We'll see you then.

[Ben]

Cheers, guys.

[Evan]

Cheers.