Ken Speaks For The First Time About His Injury

Summary

Life Wide Open with CboysTV

Episode: Ken Speaks For The First Time About His Injury

Release Date: September 27, 2022
Hosts: CJ, Ben, Ryan, Ken, Evan, Micah

---

Episode Overview

This episode of Life Wide Open is centered around Ken’s serious neck injury, marking the first time he publicly speaks in detail about the incident, his recovery process, and how it has affected both him and the group. The conversation then transitions into discussions about risk, safety with vehicles, community reactions, and the importance of gear. The crew also dives into behind-the-scenes stories, fan pranks (including the infamous "Golf Ball Bandit"), fan-made cassette tape music, podcast antics, and their evolving bets and challenges.

---

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Ken’s Injury: The Full Story

• Ken details the accident:

  • He rolled a side by side (UTV), and being too tall, the roll cage collapsed, fracturing his C7 vertebra (00:36–01:10).
  • He’s been in a neck brace/collar for about two months.
  • Expectations are he’ll still be in the brace during an upcoming Vegas trip; brace is due off post-Vegas (01:16–01:26).
  • Despite the injury, Ken has kept spirits high ("Inconvenience for a couple months, but you're... taking bins, handling it." — 13:46).

• Ken on the day-to-day reality:

  • Distractions help, but sleeping is hard because of pain ("All you can focus on is like, I just want to go to bed. And it's just my neck and my upper back are just throb. It feels like somebody's stabbing it." — Ken, 03:10–03:17).
  • He finds lying fully down helps more than sitting.
  • He’s continued showing up to work, not missing a day (04:15–04:20).

• Community response and the shared reality of injury:

  • Ken and the others discuss how many community members have suffered similar injuries — both comforting and sobering (04:33–05:16).
  • Reading comments from those with permanent injuries was tough for the crew (05:29–05:37).
  • Changed perspectives: the group now has less trust in stock vehicle roll cages, after seeing how the accident unfolded (05:35–06:46).

• Safety lessons learned:

  • Emphasize use of helmets, true fixed harnesses, and neck braces ("The specialist I saw… those neck braces are no joke. Like those can help out so many people from these types of injuries too." — Ken, 07:27).
  • The video of the accident was tough to watch and got age-restricted on YouTube due to its severity, but the team felt it was important for educational purposes (08:59–10:40).

• On mental attitude and recovery:

  • Ken: “You can either stay mad about something or you can get over it… I can walk.” (13:58–14:14)
  • The crew recognizes Ken’s positivity and resilience (14:31–14:54).

Notable Quotes

• “[The] cage kind of, like, collapsed in a little bit… fractured my C7 vertebrae.” — Ken, 00:51–01:06
• “It feels like somebody's stabbing it.” — Ken, 03:17
• "Ken, do you think that's the drugs?" — Ryan
  "No… You can either stay mad about something or you can get over it… I can walk." — Ken, 13:51–14:14
• "Who breaks their neck and only says ow? And then 'I'm too fucking big for this thing.'" — Crew, 22:19–22:24

---

2. The Aftermath: Safety Practices & Vehicle Analysis

• The group debates aftermarket vs. stock roll cages and harnesses, realizing their own prior ignorance and resolving to improve their equipment (06:21–08:21).
• Footage of the accident shows harnesses with too much slack; cage compresses alarmingly (08:24–08:54).
• Discussion about the randomness and unpredictability of such accidents; no one is blamed, but reflection is intense (11:09–13:11).
• Ken isn’t sure if he’ll ride in a side by side again (“We'll see if I get some PTSD jumping in that thing.” — Ken, 23:55).

---

3. Life with a Broken Neck

• Ken’s practical adaptations—social activities, drinking with a straw, and managing brace discomfort (18:36–19:24).
• Physical therapy plans: pending after brace removal (19:29–19:43).
• Mom’s reaction to delayed news of Ken’s injury — humor and reality ("I probably didn't help the situation considering this happened on a Tuesday and I didn't tell her until Thursday… over text." — Ken, 16:24–16:47).

Light-Hearted Moments

• Jokes about turning a bed into a recliner, upper deckers, and creative solutions for comfort post-injury (15:42–16:08).
• “Ken’s neck brace is sticky for the rest of the night and just gross.” — Crew, 21:33

---

4. CBoysTV Community Moments & Fan Antics

The Golf Ball Bandit (47:43–54:10)

• A mysterious individual dumps hundreds of golf balls in their parking lot.
• The crew speculates about motive—malice or elaborate fan prank?
• Boyish excitement transitions to plans for payback: sell the golf balls (possibly to the bandit) or set up a kid-run lemonade/golf ball stand across from his workplace.
• “We should invite him… reckless golfing with us.” — CJ, 52:06

Cassette Tape Mixtape (57:33–64:01)

• A fan leaves a cassette tape of original songs taped to the studio door.
• Initially found creepy, the tape’s contents endear the crew: personal, funny lyrics about the CBoys ("How does it feel to be so free?" — Fan song, 62:41).
• Group contemplates using the song in a video ("We should use it in a video if you can get an MP3 version." — CJ, 63:57).
• Discussion on how one even makes a cassette in 2022, and how unique, quirky fan projects form a special part of the Cboys’ connection with their viewers.

---

5. Classic CboysTV Banter

• Friendly ribbing about nipple piercings and various lost bets/challenges (24:19–34:08), with new competitions proposed—foot races, sperm counts, even a potential triathlon.
• Reflection on past dares and body modifications for the channel (36:40–41:48).

---

6. New Projects & Business News

Boat Partnership

• Announcement of a new, highly customized Centurion boat partnership through U Motors (43:23–46:43).
• The group jokes about choosing an outrageous color scheme, ultimately opting for something resellable and practical.
• “We could have made the ugliest boat.” — CJ, 44:01

---

7. Lifestyle, Health, and Sports Talk

• Discussion about caffeine dependency and the struggle to quit, with anecdotes about energy drinks and soda (71:06–78:57).
• Ben reflects on the addictive nature of sugar and the grandpa’s old adage: “drinking a beer is better for you than a pop.” (78:21–78:47)
• Mini-segment about Minnesota Vikings fandom, mental health, and sports betting (“It’s crazy how much sports you flick emotion.” — CJ, 81:46).

---

Memorable Quotes and Moments

• “You can either stay mad about something or you can get over it… I can walk.” — Ken, 14:14
• “If it flipped and landed on the roof from that… that would have been a bad deal.” — 11:16–11:23
• “We'll see if I get some PTSD jumping in that thing.” — Ken, 23:55
• “Who breaks their neck and only says ‘ow’? And then ‘I’m too fucking big for this thing.’” — 22:19–22:24
• [Fan Song] “How does it feel to be irresistible? … How do we live wild as the vibe here? Living in the sea, SeaboysTV!” — 62:39–62:51

---

Timestamps for Significant Segments

• Ken’s detailed account of accident & recovery: 00:36–05:21
• Safety & roll cage discussion: 05:35–08:21
• Reflections on the accident video & criticism: 08:54–10:40
• Ken’s outlook & emotion: 13:51–14:14
• Ken updates on physical/mental health, mom’s reaction: 16:18–17:50
• Golf Ball Bandit saga: 47:43–54:10
• Cassette tape fan song segment: 57:33–64:01
• Business/boat partnership: 43:23–46:43
• Health & caffeine talk: 71:06–78:57

---

Tone & Atmosphere

• The episode is classic CboysTV: a blend of goofy, heartfelt camaraderie, self-deprecating humor, and honest assessment of risk and consequences.
• Even when addressing serious topics (spinal injury), the mood remains positive and focused on growth and group cohesion.
• The group’s approach to both personal trials and fan interactions is pragmatic but warm—lessons are learned, jokes are made, and forward motion is never in doubt.

---

Closing Thoughts

For fans and new listeners alike, this episode offers a raw look at the realities behind the stunts: the physical costs, emotional toll, lessons learned, and constant adaptation it takes to keep CBoysTV running. Ken’s resilience and the crew’s support shines, while humor, mischief, and community remain at the podcast’s heart.

Transcript

[A]

Dude, speaking of Evan breaking things, he broke another thing today.

[B]

What?

[A]

This kid steer. He walks in all sad.

[B]

We're gonna have to make some wrecking ball merch because that's what Evan is to fund.

[C]

Keeping Evan around. It's getting expensive, man.

[B]

He's just sitting back.

[C]

Dude, it's honestly impressive, bro. Everything you touch, not even everything you.

[D]

Look at, it's the variety of things you're able to break too.

[C]

Evan, did you look at Ken funny?

[D]

That's. That's what it was. That's what caused it.

[B]

He was watching as they went over the jump.

[A]

So we've got Ken here he is in brace with a Ken, would you like to explain kind of your injury and how it's progressed?

[D]

So we rolled side by side, and I'm too tall for most things side.

[A]

By side included planes, economy class in planes.

[D]

So when you rolled it, the. The cage kind of, like, collapsed in a little bit and kind of just, like, came out of my head and fractured my C7 vertebrae or what is it?

[B]

Yeah, your C7 fractured it.

[D]

Is that a vertebrae or what is that?

[B]

That's a vertebra.

[D]

So, yeah, I'm in a. A collar, I think is what they call it. For two months now.

[A]

Do you get that off by the time we go to Vegas?

[D]

No, Mid Vegas. Vegas. No, like. Like, after. It's mid November, so after Vegas.

[A]

Shoot.

[D]

So maybe I get some sympathy things. The clubs.

[A]

There you go.

[E]

There you go.

[A]

Ken's gonna be up, so you're gonna.

[B]

Be in there with your brace.

[D]

I don't know.

[B]

I mean, his brace hasn't slowed him.

[C]

Down one bit yet.

[B]

It really hasn't. Can you told me spirits have been extremely high.

[C]

Told him he can't drive for two months.

[B]

Let me drive him around for two days. Okay, so driving.

[D]

Driving around the lakes is a little different than driving around, like, on the highway. Like, there's no cars.

[A]

It's.

[D]

It's. It's fall. Everyone's cabin is closed up. There's nobody around here. I have to go, like, okay, there's no car that way. There's no car that way. I'm good. I can go.

[C]

Elon doesn't beep at you?

[D]

Oh, I requested the full self driving beta thing, and they haven't said anything back to me. Just in the queue for it.

[A]

So did you tell them you're injured?

[B]

Hold up.

[C]

Yeah. So, okay, once you get it, though, does it full on drive itself or how does that work?

[D]

Supposedly it'll, like, go to a stop sign and stop and Turn and do everything.

[B]

So you actually bought that?

[D]

I subscribe to it.

[B]

So what's that cost?

[D]

200 bucks a month. Or if you buy it, it's $15,000, which is the biggest ripoff in the car industry. I feel like.

[B]

Wait, so you pay 200 bucks a month and it will drive you. You don't have to touch a wheel.

[D]

I mean, if you get into the beta, which I'm not in the beta.

[C]

Yet, it's like the club, if they give you access to it.

[A]

But I love how you're paying for it right now. Like, you paid the COVID charge, but you still didn't get in.

[D]

But it's like you have to pay the. You have to pay for the beta every month and you get like some gimmick features and then they, like, watch you. They watch how you drive, like how you accelerate, how you turn, like if you're paying attention to the road or not.

[A]

So that's why you haven't let any of us drive your car.

[B]

Yeah. So. So how do you feel, Ken? Like what? Like, just right now, how are things during the day?

[D]

Like, when I'm able to, like, distract myself and, like, do things and kind of.

[B]

Kind of take your mind off?

[D]

I kind of take my mind off things. It's fine. Like, it's uncomfortable, but it's not bad. But it's like when I lay down and, like, try and go to bed and it's.

[B]

That's got to be the worst.

[D]

That's like, all you can focus on is like, I just want to go to bed. And it's just my neck and my upper back are just throb. It feels like somebody's stabbing it.

[C]

Really?

[B]

So do you just lay straight back? I'd imagine.

[D]

Yeah. It's annoying, right?

[C]

I think we kind of brushed over this, but it's a full on broken neck.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

And there's comments on the last video. There was actually. That's like a whole separate part of this we'll get into after. But I saw. I read a couple comments on it, and I knew people would say this, and they were like, you said it's fractured. That's not broken, dude.

[B]

Like, I know. I literally. That's why when we went in, I. I had to clarify, I said, to be clear, he has a broken neck. This is a broken neck. And because I knew. And I'm not saying that all of our subscribers are like it. I think it's a small percentage, but it's just so funny. They have to act all big dick, like, Oh, I rolled my razor five times, and I still hop back in and sen it. Like. Like all those comments, I'm like, dude, get the out of here.

[A]

Like, and to Ken's credit, he hasn't missed a day of work.

[B]

Yeah. And he did. It's a. He's literally hurt.

[A]

Yeah, exactly.

[B]

Like, anybody who tries to discredit it or.

[A]

But honestly, I. I hate to focus on that small portion because I saw so many people. They're like, this also happened as well.

[B]

I would say.

[A]

I am glad for the general good.

[D]

It's amazing. Like, I was out and about this weekend and it's. It's amazing. Like, you say, oh, I broke my neck doing this. And they're like, oh, I know somebody. My husband, my friend. Like, they also did something similar to that, and it's just like, holy crap.

[B]

I kind of found that out too. Like, the. I was thinking, like, there's got to be really no one that's done something. Like, very few. But, like, we came across probably, what, two or three different people that are kind of.

[D]

I just, like, we sat and got lunch on Saturday, and there was three people that came up then, and I had some supper last night and two.

[A]

More people came up.

[B]

To me, it was. It's. It was tough to hear, but it was also comforting because you're like, okay, so, like, these people have recovered. They're okay, you know, and that.

[C]

That.

[B]

That made me feel better, I would say. And hopefully it made you feel better.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

What you guys think when reading the comments, like, how did that make you feel? Seeing kind of how many people have been injured like, that?

[B]

It was tough to read the ones where they're like, permanently.

[C]

Permanently. Right.

[B]

I felt so bad, dude.

[C]

I had such a hard time reading that. And then, you know, when an accident like that does happen, it's like, relatable where it's like, hey, I've been through the same thing. I know how you feel, Ken. But, like, I don't know, dude. My heart just, like, goes out to, like, people that get injured like that, and then they kind of just watch. I don't. Our videos and, like, almost just seeing people doing, like, the things that injured you, maybe. And it's like a much different light. Like, I can't look at, like, razors or, like, side by sides the same after watching that and have the same, like, trust and faith in it or, like, excitement to, like, get in it. Like, I don't know about you guys, but, like, dude, I do not trust those things. Those roll cages. One fucking bit anymore.

[B]

I really have never trusted them and I would agree with that. Yeah, I like, I ever since like when we were in Florida and you were riding, you guys were riding with the side by side guys and they were launching those jumps. They were. They're a little bit bigger than probably our biggest jump on the track. And I guess they do have aftermarket cages, but I don't even know if those would have held up from how high you guys were dropping and shit. Luckily no one got hurt because those guys are awesome drivers. No one crashed or not Extremely close, but you were extremely close. Do you know how much different that day would have been if you would have tumbled that? Like we'll overlay the clip here. You could have been like Ken, if not worse.

[C]

Yeah, no, it's terrifying and like to think how many people that watch our videos have gone through something like that.

[B]

And how many haven't though. And I don't want them to. But like this is a good awareness type of thing.

[A]

That's how I would use it, you.

[B]

Know, like, like you can't trust a stock cage or really obviously unless you get a really high aftermarket cage. But you still can get hurt. Like this is, you know, you got to take this kind of stuff seriously.

[D]

The helmet, the specialist I saw, he was saying the other thing like those neck braces are no joke. Like those can help out so many people from these types of injuries too.

[B]

Like the like, like the whatever it.

[C]

Is a moto, like a moto neck.

[D]

Just cuz like it can, you know, say it even like crushes your collarbone. It's not your spine. Like you can collar bones the least of your injuries at that point.

[A]

Yeah, no kidding. Comparatively to a neck.

[B]

Yeah. Make sure you wear your helmet. Wear your like if that thing didn't have harnesses and I, I even think those harnesses weren't as ideal because they are retractable. I think for like this kind of stuff you should really have like convenience factor.

[D]

Those retractable ones are great but like is actually holding you in place.

[B]

It's like, I mean if this is going to be this, if we're going to be doing jumps and stuff like this, we need to have something that's you know, fixed harnesses because I don't know. But definitely, definitely need new cage.

[A]

Yeah, definitely A huge wake up moment.

[C]

For the boys for sure.

[B]

For sure.

[C]

Dude, watch. Watching that footage back when we were editing the video, me and CJ, I didn't even want to put in the GoPro shot of the face. Like Head on of them. Because you can see Ken basically fall out of the seat. And the harnesses don't engage for like 4 inches. I would say it's like, what the is the point? Yeah, they don't engage for like 4 inches. And you can just see. And then his head hits.

[B]

And then the head.

[C]

The cage compresses.

[B]

Dude, it was hard.

[C]

I didn't want to put it in.

[B]

And then, honestly, I didn't want to watch that video. I wouldn't.

[C]

I wouldn't either, really.

[A]

See, when you would go frame by frame, that's when it was super.

[B]

Well, I felt like it was important. Damage has been done. It was important to show. And also, like, like we said, this is a learning thing. And also, like, I just know how some people are. Oh, they didn't even crush that hard. And I was like, we need to show this. Like, it was basically as raw as it gets. Like, no music, no nothing. Just showed everything full back. And it was tough to watch. And the YouTube video actually got age restricted, as you guys know. So if your YouTube video gets age restricted, it'll be for a number of reasons. But basically, YouTube deems that that video unsuitable for anyone under the age of 18. So in order to view that video, you have to have a YouTube account. And the YouTube account has to be, like, signed in. Signed in with a person. Yeah. Age verified that you're over 18, which is a big problem, honestly, for your video, getting more views. So, like, this. This video was doing pretty decent. Not that we really cared. Like, normally we're happy if a video is doing really well, but none of us were like, this video is doing good because we were just, like, just a shitty situation that you don't really want your video to go. We wouldn't have. We would rather not have had this video. Yeah, but it was doing. It was getting a lot of views and it was gaining a lot of traction. Then once it got deemed unsuitable for anyone under the age of 18, it has stopped and has literally gained 3000 views since. In the last 24 hours since it hit, which is sucks. So hopefully we can get that overturned. But basically it lost all traction because, you know, they can't. YouTube can't promote a video that is, you know, it's not appeasable or appealable to the masses.

[A]

Yep.

[C]

Yeah. Do you guys think that the video, like, showcased how, like, how fast things can go wrong on, like, the dumbest shit? And that's usually when it. When, you know, unthinkable happens, something that you would never expect but do you think that we did, like, a good job, like, showcasing, like, oh, my gosh, we had no idea and this happened. Like, be careful or. Or take that into consideration or.

[B]

I think we did. I think we did a decent job of it. I guess we could have done more, but I don't think we did.

[A]

It was kind of like, well, how are you supposed to do it? You know?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know, progressed fast through. And then it was like, the thing happened.

[B]

I really think it was put together. Right. I mean, it showed the. Showed all that. I mean, there was some things that got cut. So, like, one of the things that got caught was, like, me saying, we're lucky that it happened on this rather than on a bigger jump, because if it would have happened on a bigger jump, I mean, you're jumping 100ft at what, like, 40 miles an hour at the least. If it flipped and land on the roof from that, those cages don't do as we learned, that would have been bad deal. And then also, like, it was such a fluke thing, I guess. You know, I guess I said just drive into it. Like, I suggested that in the background, you could hear it. And then I think Kyle was trying to land in it. It was one of those situations where if he would have gone a little bit slower, it wouldn't have flipped because it would have just ran into it. And if he would have gone a little bit faster, it wouldn't have flipped because he wouldn't have, like.

[C]

Like, he.

[A]

It was a.

[B]

He was going the perfect. Wrong speed.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

For the worst, like, turnout, like, where it touched that first rail and then kind of got it tipping and then touched the other one. Like, I mean, it just. It's such a bad deal.

[C]

Those things jump, like, too.

[B]

And. Yeah. Can ams jump, like, spring up? Like, unless you have aftermarket? I don't know. I just.

[A]

That is true. They were. They were like, oh, you have to jump with the special technique. And we're just like, I don't know. We just hit the jump.

[B]

He's, like, hitting the break before he would hit the jumps that way, it would, like, compress the front shocks and then hopefully rebound at the right time off the lip.

[C]

He didn't do it on that one. That was the one time that he didn't do that. Which is probably part of the reason. Part of the reason as well.

[B]

I don't know.

[C]

And honestly, I don't think it's Kyle's fault either.

[A]

No.

[B]

No.

[C]

So, like. And I can't imagine how bad he feels.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

I, I overlooked it. I didn't even think anything of it. CJ didn't even want to film it because we didn't think it was gonna.

[B]

Yeah, I wanted to go home.

[D]

End of the day thing.

[B]

Alex on me to go out to eat and I was already late. That's why she pulled up, cuz she was been waiting for so long. She's like, I'm just going to come and see what you're doing. And I was like, I was, you know. Yeah, I, I didn't think it was going to be even cool.

[C]

I'm glad you're okay though, Ken. Like this could be so much worse and we could be having such a different conversation. So the fact that you are, you know, as okay as you are.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Like dude talk.

[B]

What a blessing in terms of the situation. Yeah.

[D]

Inconvenience for a couple months, but you're.

[B]

Taking bins, handling it. Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

So yeah. You, you have been hella positive even by many standards. Even a more positive. Ken, do you think that's the drugs?

[D]

No, I. Ryan, I remember your, your dad always said you can either stay mad about something or you can get over it. And I have, I can either get mad and just have a shitty time or I can just get over it and try look at the positive side of things and just be like, yeah, I can walk.

[A]

Yeah, you're a legend.

[B]

Yeah, Ken.

[D]

Because just getting mad about it and just having that anger is all it's going to do. Raise your blood pressure, make you feel like. And just gonna have an awful week and you know.

[A]

Yeah, definitely.

[C]

Ken, did you hit your head?

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Little reset.

[B]

Ken.

[A]

No, I, I love it and I, I truly. I can't imagine how you, you've handled it so well, both in your emotional like, well being for yourself and outwards. And I'm, I'm very proud of you.

[B]

So I probably, I guarantee you I wouldn't be handling as well as you.

[A]

No, definitely not.

[B]

And so yeah, I gotta really add points to that for Ken. I mean.

[A]

Yeah. Shout out to Big Ken.

[B]

Yeah, I keep asking them too. Like when we're around the house and stuff, I'm like, like, is there anything I can get you? Like, do you want like a better chair or something? Like I'm like trying to figure something out that can like help his.

[D]

It honestly feels better to like just fully lay down than like try and sit in a chair because there's like still pressure on the back.

[B]

I was like trying to figure out if there's like a chair that like could like, help you?

[A]

I don't know.

[D]

No, it's just, it's just nice laying in bed and just kind of getting the pressure off everything.

[B]

And so that way, just let us know if you need anything, obviously. And we got your back.

[D]

Yeah. Thanks. Thanks, boys.

[C]

Too bad that we got rid of the recliner.

[B]

I know. Oh.

[D]

Oh, I'm. I, I don't. I, I don't. I'm glad that thing's gone. That was disgusting.

[A]

Would have been perfect for this moment.

[B]

Like.

[C]

Nope, nope. I'll be good here for the next.

[D]

I'm good.

[A]

We could turn a bed into one.

[B]

Oh, my gosh.

[C]

Here we go.

[A]

We could set up Evan's bunk bed over the top of the toilet.

[C]

You call it like the, the tempur pedic potty.

[A]

Yeah, the upper deckers.

[D]

Upper decker steamer.

[A]

Yeah, the upper decker sleeper steamer.

[B]

There we go.

[C]

I think we might be onto something.

[A]

I think we might.

[D]

At that point, you're probably high enough where you hopefully don't get any splash and.

[A]

Ah, Ken, you're a legend.

[B]

How's your mom taking it? How's your.

[D]

She was mad. She was very mad.

[B]

Like chewing you out.

[D]

Yeah, she was like, you could have died. You could have been paralyzed.

[B]

Blah, blah, blah.

[D]

I was like, yeah, I'm okay. Like, you don't need to worry. Like, thank you for being worried, but sorry, I probably wasn't. I pro. I probably didn't help the situation considering this happened on a Tuesday and I didn't tell her till Thursday. No, I, I, I also totally over text, so it wasn't the greatest way.

[E]

To do it, but.

[C]

How'd you word that?

[D]

I was like, hey, mom, let me look at it.

[C]

Oh, man.

[D]

Hey. I thought I would let you know I was in a side by side accident earlier this week and I fractured my C7. I'm doing fine. I just have to wear a brace for a couple weeks. Don't worry about it.

[C]

Don't worry about it.

[D]

Well, so this happened at like 8 o' clock and we go to the ER and then she sends me a text like as I'm laying in the ER bed. And I was like, I'm not. They're probably going to bed. I'm not gonna tell them. I'll figure out. I'll tell them tomorrow because you don't want her to worry going to bed. So I'll probably just get, you know, get all amped up and go to the hospital and it's not gonna help anything. And then next day it was like I had to go to the follow up with the. The specialist. And I was like, just forgot about it. And then came back to the shop and just laid on the bed for the rest of the afternoon. And then Thursday rolls around. I was like, I gotta tell them. But yeah. Oh, well, she was mad about it, but she got over it, I hope. I haven't seen him since. So.

[A]

I can imagine she was fairly rattled reading that text. Coming out of the blue.

[D]

Yeah. And I told Cody is like. Because Cody found out right away. Because they had supper and met up with Alex.

[A]

Yeah, they'd seen her.

[D]

And I was like, cody, do not tell mom. I don't want her to get all like, rattled tonight.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Because Cody called me, goes, hey, Grant hasn't answered his phone. Hey, head and answer his phone in a couple hours. Is he alive? And I was like, yeah, he's here. He's working right now. And he was like, he's at work. And I was like, yeah. I don't know.

[D]

He said, well, I was laying in bed all day basically that day.

[A]

Yeah, that's true, I'm sure.

[D]

But went upstairs and laid in the guest bedroom.

[C]

But still you were here, Ken. You haven't let it slow you down, though. I saw some videos or pictures from Saturday night. Looked like you got into the liquor to help the pain or what.

[D]

I was gonna not drink for a while. And then we see the. The neurosurgeon guy at the bar. We're getting lunch and he's like, yeah, you can drink. I don't know why you aren't.

[B]

He did say that.

[A]

Amazing.

[D]

I was like, okay. And then we go to, you know, these people down the. The road from us, they're going to. Going down south for the winter. And so she's trying to get rid of all the booze in their house.

[C]

Ken was just being.

[D]

I was just like, fuck. Okay, I'll. I'll help out.

[C]

What is what a solid neighbor move.

[A]

So what's the hardest part about drinking now? Is it harder to take shots and throwing them back?

[D]

Yeah, because it's slowed down, basically. Can't that. Can't like throw it up there, but I just get a straw and it's nice.

[A]

Has it slow. Oh, so it slowed down your chug buddy time.

[D]

I. I can't do that. I can't like, go back far enough.

[C]

Well, Ken, we'll get you back in therapy so you can chug buddy.

[A]

Is there physical therapy after this? I've kind of.

[D]

I would assume so. He didn't say so I just have to go To a followup in a couple weeks, probably some X rays, look at it again and evaluate from there at least two months in the brace. So.

[A]

Damn.

[D]

I'd assume that. Or maybe slightly more, but we'll see.

[A]

Is that the brace for two months? Yeah.

[E]

Dang.

[D]

It's kind of nice.

[A]

It's got padding in it, so it isn't. Is it, like, incredibly uncomfortable or is it. I mean, it's uncomfortable without a doubt.

[D]

But I think good, cuz like, even if I, like, move my head and, like, the extremities of the brace, I can, like, feel like it gets a little painful at the extremities. So I feel like if I didn't have a brace, there's nothing to, like, stop it. Yeah, it's like holding your head in place. So if, like, I'd do that myself. I just feel like I'd get so, like, exhausted all day. True. And I'd probably, like, you know, you accidentally move, you know, try and move your whole twist of your head. I feel like that would mess something up pretty bad.

[C]

My buddy broke his neck in college, and it was like, right at the heat of the. Of college getting going. I think he was a freshman or a sophomore.

[A]

That's right.

[B]

And he broke his neck, too, except his was way worse.

[C]

His was super bad. Yeah, like, like, so close to being, like, paralyzed.

[D]

And he, like.

[C]

Or even killing him. It was, like, really bad.

[D]

Like, blackout from that.

[B]

Well, which.

[D]

Which part initially? Well, that kind of. That kind of.

[C]

So he was blacked out when he broke his neck. And they said he was so drunk, he fell over the stands onto the track at a football game. And he. They said he was so drunk, he didn't brace at all for impact. He just said for impact. And that, like, saved his life. And Yeah, I mean, he didn't really let it slow him down too much either. Like, they were doing shots off of his neck brace, like, the next week, I think.

[B]

Oh, my gosh. Jesus.

[D]

Damn.

[A]

Right.

[C]

We'll be taking shots off of Ken's neck.

[D]

I don't think so, but.

[B]

Yeah, I don't think I want to do that either.

[A]

Yeah, I'm good.

[C]

No cjs for good luck.

[A]

Yeah, dude, do it for your buddy.

[B]

I'll do it for Ken if he wants me to.

[A]

Ken's neck phrase is sticky for the rest of the night and just gross.

[D]

Two pads. I get two sets of pads for it. So there you go.

[A]

You have to shower in the whole rig and everything?

[D]

No, I got a different one for showering because this One, like, soak the water in because it's got padding. The other one's like just straight up foam.

[A]

Nice, but.

[D]

All right. Mike, do you want to go in here? I gotta, like, lay down.

[C]

That's all we get of Ken today, ladies and gentlemen.

[A]

Well, ladies and gentlemen, give. Give Ken a round of applause. He's a fucking trooper. We love you, Ken. And also, not to mention, he hasn't been in the podcast studio since this happened because he can't stand up straight in here.

[C]

Dude, he's too big.

[A]

He's too big.

[C]

He's too fucking big. The first words out of his mouth after he crashed.

[A]

Who breaks their neck and only says ow? And then I'm too fucking big for this thing.

[B]

Yeah, that's legendary.

[A]

So we're gonna get a special extra large cage for Ken. Or maybe he's gonna take.

[E]

Well, I think that's the worst part, Kenny.

[C]

Never hopping in a side by side.

[A]

You never know.

[E]

As soon as that happened, we were being proactive and ordered a cage right away for our side by side. The. The cool thing about an aftermarket cage, much stronger. The possible downside is that they usually are slightly sleeker and lower. Oh, you know, it's not really. I think in the front seats of the Razor, he'll be just fine. But I don't.

[C]

See Ken hop. Ken.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

I forgot to ask you, Ken, are you hopping back in the Razor? Are you done? I have one more question, actually, before we get you out.

[A]

I'm sorry to make the fucking. We could bring the microphone over to him.

[C]

Sorry. So where do you go in your no can do career from here?

[D]

This is no can do part two.

[A]

Because it's version two.

[C]

It was no can do for about five years and then there was a six month stint, maybe even five month, where you were leaning towards yes, you were saying yes more. And it seems like you've gotten back into the no can do.

[D]

Yes, that's. That's correct. Gone, gone, gone for a few months at least.

[A]

A few months.

[C]

Light at the end of the tunnel.

[D]

We'll see.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Do you feel like you want to get back in a razor?

[D]

We'll see how this cage looks.

[A]

I don't know. You're not like, fully.

[D]

Well, we'll see if I get some PTSD jumping in that thing.

[A]

That's why. That's why I was kind of asking, like, looking ahead. Do you feel like it's even a horse you want to get back in?

[D]

I don't know yet.

[A]

Yeah, understandable. It's only Been less than a week.

[D]

It has it. It's a week tomorrow, so we'll see how it goes, but. All right. I gotta lay down.

[A]

All right. Thanks, Cam.

[E]

Man, Such a trooper. It's a real bummer that this whole broken neck thing had to overshadow my nipple piercing. I'm kidding. I'm actually kidding.

[C]

Well, Mike, you also kind of did that to yourself.

[E]

Exactly. Yeah. I agree.

[A]

You undersold a bit.

[E]

I undersold a lot. Yeah.

[A]

Which I think was part of your shtick.

[E]

Was fun. Yeah, I was.

[A]

Because you were going to go in and act like it didn't hurt. Yeah.

[E]

And it did. I. And it actually hurts more, like, now than it did when I did it.

[B]

Oh, shit. Really? Really?

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

Is it infected?

[E]

No, it's doing all right. But, like, every time I readjust it, I'm like, okay, well, I don't want to get stuck in one spot. So you readjust it. It's just. It's kind of on fire.

[B]

So what Sydney think of it?

[E]

Doesn't like. It doesn't like. It really doesn't like it.

[C]

Define doesn't like it. Like, doesn't think you should have got it. Or just like, he's like, gross or is like.

[E]

Second one. But it's like every time, you know, like, an accidental hand brushes over something, I touched it. That kind of gross.

[B]

Really?

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Huh.

[E]

So I. Greta, don't act that way.

[C]

Accidental hand.

[A]

It's fine.

[E]

Right?

[A]

The back of the hand.

[C]

You're letting her touch his nipple.

[E]

The back of the hand.

[A]

It was the back of the hand. It was like.

[B]

It's like you get more tsa.

[E]

You guys literally jinx that.

[B]

What's Greta think of yours?

[C]

Oh, she loves it.

[B]

So she touches it.

[A]

She came around.

[E]

She came around.

[B]

I'd say, like, puts her tongue to it and stuff.

[C]

Yeah, she loves it.

[A]

Really?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

I can almost just feel the sarcasm from over here. Huh?

[C]

No, she. She'll do a towel one day. She'll come come on the podcast and she'll tell you guys all about it.

[E]

Oh, I was hoping there'd be a lot more to this tell all than just the nipple.

[C]

Oh, actually, I don't want to come.

[B]

Into the podcast if she's doing a tell Exposes, Ben.

[C]

I don't need that.

[A]

But yours isn't infected yet because Evans is infected.

[B]

Is it?

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

Oh, really? What? Taco late in the game for an infection?

[C]

Whoa.

[E]

Recently, Evan said last Thursday. Oh, man.

[A]

What?

[C]

From what?

[E]

I have no idea. Maybe the hot tub. That could be.

[C]

Oh, our hot Tub guy has been off duty ever since.

[B]

They do.

[E]

Yeah, that's true. Well, and it was tough because, like, if there was any time for Evan's nipple piercing to get infected, it would have been the day after he did it, when he went in the swamp into the swamp with the snow bike. But the fact that it's just happening now, like, when you get yours, like, three months ago, I even know.

[C]

All right, we got two left here, and we're not doing the parking situation.

[B]

I think that's lame.

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

No, I mean, like, I want to get it off of something good.

[A]

I just think. I think the whole nipple thing is.

[B]

It's.

[A]

It's lame.

[C]

Played out. It's played out.

[B]

I think it's played out. No, I'm getting bored of watching it.

[C]

I think. No, people are getting bored of watching it in that aspect of the parking.

[A]

Situation because Micah's was boring.

[C]

Yeah, Mike, you kind of did do that.

[E]

What are you going to do?

[C]

Luckily, no, I agree.

[A]

I don't know how it reacted either.

[C]

But anyway, so now there's got to be one way. Like, you guys got to be, like, put up to each other and, like, the foot race.

[A]

A foot race.

[B]

I.

[E]

Too lame.

[C]

Pretty good, though.

[B]

Pretty funny.

[E]

Just because the reason.

[C]

Wait, wait, wait, wait. What if we did? Like, who can run the farthest? Oh, boy.

[B]

Both of you. Took me about five minutes long.

[A]

He's got a little bit of. He's been in the gym in the last six months.

[D]

Do this sperm count thing.

[B]

Sperm count.

[E]

Okay. How funny would that be if, like, you had lower.

[B]

Whatever.

[C]

Whoever has the lower sperm count.

[E]

For the record, I know for a fact CJ's not planning nor expecting to have a lower sperm count.

[C]

Really?

[B]

Why do you think that I'm not.

[E]

Because you want it so bad.

[C]

I'm gonna ace this test. Like, yo, we're not doing anything tomorrow. We should go into the sperm bank and get our sperm.

[A]

Is it sperm or testosterone that you want to test?

[E]

I mean, technically sperm or both. Yeah, yeah.

[B]

No, like. Like, it's like your sperm count.

[C]

Dude, I love it. That's a great idea.

[A]

This just happened right now.

[B]

You guys just watch this. You have the least. So now you get even more, though. I would say having the lower sperm count, because then you have less probability of getting a girl pregnant.

[E]

True. There's a big upside to that, girlfriend. Also, there's.

[B]

That's your goal.

[A]

Unless your goal is the other thing. Then.

[B]

Then it's. Then it's not a good thing.

[C]

Okay, so you. You're saying that the person that has the most should.

[B]

I guess. I don't know. It doesn't matter to me. I'm down to do it, but I don't necessarily think I'm going to have more, but I just thought it would more so be funny.

[E]

I do like everyone, that is, if it was between the. We'd probably all do it. But if it was between you two and whatever, like, that's good. We'll think of something dumb.

[C]

Like that might be even dumber than the party situation. Imagine explaining that to the nipple piercing guy. So what are you in for?

[B]

Oh, the lower. Jesus.

[A]

I jerked off in a cup and mine wasn't as good, apparently.

[E]

Yeah. I mean, to twist it up to. You couldn't do the higher sperm count. Has to get it. Because then it's like, yeah, I mean.

[B]

I'm down to do that necessarily greater thing. I think maybe even, like, the foot race would be funny, but also, I mean, both of them would be funny. It just depends on how it gets.

[A]

We could do a triathlon.

[B]

I can't really swim, but I guess.

[A]

That'D be not a triathlon. I just mean, like, holy shit. Foot race, sperm count. And then we've got one other thing.

[B]

Ryan was talking like, you couldn't run to the end of the driveway. I can't do it.

[A]

No. Not run a triathlon.

[B]

Start the whole shot from the race. That's it.

[E]

But I think if it were running on a. On a foot race like, that training would be involved. Like, would you not want. I'd probably try to get the stamina up a little bit or the top speed up a little bit. To not get a nipple piercing?

[B]

Well, yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

You know, I'd probably work out.

[C]

I mean, once a month, maybe we.

[B]

Should have a thing where it's like the last person standing doesn't have to get it because ultimately. Well.

[E]

Are you fighting?

[B]

No, no, no, no. I'm saying, like, the last ring. I like that the last person without a nipple ring doesn't have to get it because so, like, let's say Ryan, I do a competition. Whoever doesn't have to get it, they are now the nipple thing is done. Because otherwise it's like.

[E]

I thought that too.

[B]

It's like, no matter what, you already know you're going to get it. So it's like, what am I even holding out for?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And everyone's had a situation where it was a competition, like a fair shot where they were at a spot where they could have.

[C]

Because, like, I raised me Ken's was the best.

[B]

You were in a hot dog. Oh, yeah. Well, you broke the rule.

[E]

Yeah. But it wasn't fair.

[B]

Ryan and Ken. Ryan was supposed to get it, but then he out finagled Ken. Ken had to get it. Evan lost a hot dog eating competition. Ben lost a race, as I said. So like in, in. In reality, like, Ryan could have had one, I could have had one.

[E]

But I agree with that.

[C]

The.

[E]

The last person standing.

[B]

Otherwise there's like no point. I would just be like, dude, I'm gonna have to get this anyways.

[A]

Yeah. So I made it to the top two, huh?

[B]

How about the last person? So whatever comes out of me and yours has to do both because, like, you have to go out with a finale.

[C]

Oh, yes, yes.

[B]

Finale.

[C]

Yes.

[E]

It's mostly just the. Again the after pain. Doing both of them. Like at that first one goes in, you're like, eh. I literally almost was like, screw it. Do the second one. It'd be funny. But I. It still hurts.

[C]

I love that.

[B]

You know what's funny is like, I'm not that afraid of getting it. I'm almost just like, whatever, it'll be like funny kind of thing. But Ryan is really not trying to get it.

[E]

No.

[B]

Which almost makes me want to try harder to. To make him get it.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

But like, if I am to lose, I know it's going to hurt. And I'm not going to be necessarily super, like down to go do it, but I just know it's going to be legendary. Dude. I double nipple piercing.

[A]

I just don't have the nipples for the night, for the limelight.

[C]

None of us do.

[E]

I don't know. I don't think any of us.

[C]

Maybe even what's a nipple for the Limelight look like?

[E]

What is that?

[A]

I just, I just. I really don't want to get it.

[B]

Ryan walking around nipple piercings is just something a little bit too like, you guys, it. Everyone is kind of like, yeah, they're gonna be like, whoa, this dude's gonna get flat.

[A]

That's what I mean.

[B]

It's gonna be way funnier. Actually. He has one.

[A]

Fuck.

[C]

Can I get a shake from you guys that whoever it is, is double sure.

[A]

I'm a little clammy right now just talking about it.

[B]

Whoever loses this high level whatever, the next thing is double nipple piercing.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Hopefully it's something we can agree on that's like moderately fair.

[E]

I agree. Yeah. We don't want to have any bad taste.

[B]

Like, it can't be like a thing where it's like, Favoring. You know, that seems super random. That seems extremely random. You would not know, looking at us, to who's gonna have the lower or higher sperm count. I mean, like, there's no advantage in that. Like, if it was between who can wheelie a pit bike longer? Obviously, I'm gonna win that. If it's between, who can wheelie a quad longer? Like, obviously he's gonna win that.

[C]

So you. You want to leave it up to, like, 100% chance? No, no, no skill.

[B]

I think it has to be, like, a fair match. Like, no. Me and you raced our cars. We didn't know who was gonna win.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

Yeah. We were like, this might be close, but we truly don't know. And it.

[C]

It.

[B]

We're thinking it's gonna be close, though. So that was, like, a good instant to do it.

[E]

Okay.

[B]

If we were, like, racing Ken is Tesla plaid against me and my gtr, we'd be like, that's just dumb. Like, I might as well just head to the nipple piercing shop right now kind of thing, you know?

[E]

So you do like the sperm count idea.

[B]

I'm not against it just because it is random. If people think it'd be funny, I'm down. Imagine it just comes back, my sperm count is zero. They're like, you are tragically infertile.

[E]

I'm just like, just a bummer day for you in general.

[C]

What would you do?

[B]

I don't really know.

[C]

I feel like you would be good.

[B]

I would. I'd be like. I'd be more in shock.

[A]

I'd be, like, fonder right now.

[B]

Like, I don't know if is a good or bad thing.

[A]

Short term, probably really good.

[B]

But long term, yeah, I think long term, I would be bummed. But, like, short term, I'd be like, this ain't so bad.

[C]

Like, mixed emotions.

[B]

Yeah, it would be. I mean, seriously, I don't know how I would feel. I definitely. Probably wouldn't be crying. I mean, I definitely wouldn't be crying. A little quiet in the back, trying to figure out, like, Yeah, I feel like I'd feel like that I'm trying.

[A]

To figure out where you're at.

[E]

Right.

[B]

It'd be funny, though. That's for sure. At least we had it on video. Imagine we titled the video Infertile. Yeah. And finds out he's infertile.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

10 million views.

[E]

Emotional.

[B]

Emotional. And asterisks.

[C]

He's just crying. He's so bad.

[B]

The doc's like, now, now. I know, but there's many of other options if you want to have kids someday. I'm like, what? No, I'm just. These are tears of joy.

[E]

All right. You might have to cut this, but this is just reminding me of all this, I guess. Sperm talk. Rich sent me. He sends the most.

[A]

What?

[E]

Rich sends the most outlandish. Outlandish, like, Instagram stuff. And the last.

[A]

Probably already have to cut this.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

But no, it's okay.

[E]

The most recent one that he sent me is just this meme that says, bro, imagine if ejaculation wasn't billions of microscopic sperm cells, but it was just one big sperm cell, and every time you jacked off, you had to kill it before it squirmed too far.

[B]

Pretty dark, Mike.

[E]

Yeah, right?

[B]

I mean, probably wouldn't. Wouldn't do it so much. Probably not, that's for sure. I'm not much of a killer, you know?

[C]

Not even.

[B]

No. No way.

[E]

All right. Yeah, so. So we'll figure that out. We'll figure out a good bet between you guys.

[B]

I think it's a. It's a good win ending because someone actually wins out of the end of all this.

[A]

God, I hope it's me.

[E]

I. I guess for your sake. I do, too.

[B]

I kind of do, too.

[C]

I feel like it'd be a nice.

[B]

Way for me to, like, I don't.

[A]

Know, spice it up.

[E]

Spice it up.

[B]

I don't know. It'd be a nice contribution. It's like a way for me to give my body up for.

[E]

Well, I was going to elaborate on that, too. It's crazy stuff that we do for the channel that, like, I mean, I try to have a very open mind about, like, anything that I, like, have to do. I. I'm a little bit too much where I don't get even upset. I know that's kind of like, you know, Ken gets really upset when we asked him to do certain things and everyone. But, like, it's so funny, the stuff that we just, like, have to do for the channel. Like, I just am like, whoa, I gotta do it. I mean, like, we can always say no, but.

[B]

Yeah, but if you really didn't want to do it, though, you don't have. You don't have to. You're just more so put in a situation where you're, like, gonna be good. I don't really want to, but, like, my calculation on this is that everything's gonna be fine, and overall, it'll be a win. Yeah.

[A]

Well, it did remind me of the nipple piercing and CJ's body enhancements. Remember when he dyed your hair blue? Like, Ninja.

[E]

That was fun. That was a good time.

[B]

Those mother. Was it?

[A]

Oh, yeah, that's right. It was a prank.

[E]

Well, he basically made Shawna do it, but.

[A]

Right.

[E]

I just blame her for it. Yeah, that was really fun.

[B]

I own that.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

You walk around college like that. At least now you just, like. You just got nipple piercings. You're around these. Yeah, all the time.

[B]

Yeah. I guess it's a little bit easier to explain. Dude, I remember, dude. Fuck. Yeah, my. I look like ninja. Ninja was really popular back then. And I guess I would just wear a hat when I'd go in and, like, hoodie and stuff. But people could tell.

[C]

People probably just thought that you were a big ninja fan.

[B]

They probably thought I was going through.

[E]

I think at the time, it worked out because of ninja. I think now, at least around here, like, you have blue hair, you know, little scary.

[B]

I don't know. I look back on that, like, I'm glad I did that or I'm glad that it happened.

[E]

Yeah, it was funny.

[B]

I thought it was awesome. People thought it was funny. My ex girlfriend, we were like, on the. On the rocks at the time. And when I come home with blue. Oh, my God. Dude, she did not like that. No.

[A]

Really?

[B]

No.

[E]

Yeah, that was one of those times.

[B]

It's like, it wasn't the final, but it was like she was already like, come on, I'm not huge on this whole YouTube thing. And then you come home with blue hair.

[A]

Gonzo, dude.

[B]

It happened to me on a video. I mean, I don't know what to tell you exactly. Yeah, it was. It could have been worse. It did not last.

[C]

Could have got the bowl cut like Mike. Remember that?

[A]

That's right.

[B]

Blue hair is a little bit worse, man. What? That was like.

[E]

I disagree.

[C]

I disagree, dude. Then the bowl cut, you can just. First bowl cut I got.

[E]

Well, I mean, true.

[C]

You could just give.

[E]

Yeah, I was like, you could have got it buzzed, too.

[B]

You're still gonna have blue, though, for.

[E]

Yeah, a little bit.

[C]

But I don't know.

[E]

The first bowl cut I had was so aggressive.

[A]

It was so horrendous.

[B]

I thought you were gonna say perfect.

[A]

Yeah, horrendous.

[C]

You're telling me you would rather have a bowl cut than blue hair?

[A]

Hey, everyone, quick break in today's podcast for a word from today's sponsor, Vessi. If you've been following us for a while, you know that we love our Vessis. But if you're new here, listen up, because you're about to find your new favorite pair of shoes. Vessis are 100 waterproof, but yet look and feel like a normal sneaker. They're the perfect everyday shoes and forget having to throw on a pair of clunky boots when the weather turns. Vesses are made from Dymatex, which is a dual climate knit material that keeps your feet cool in the summer and warm in colder weather. Vessels feel just like a normal pair of sneakers, but yet are 100% waterproof. The reason I wear my vessels every day is because around here you really don't know what you're going to get into during the day. In the morning I might be sitting in my office. In the afternoon I might be outside filming in the rain or washing my car. And there's really nothing better than having dry feet all day. My favorite part about my Vessis is they don't look like a waterproof shoe. I can wear them out to eat but not have to worry about changing my shoes. If we're going to head out and go filming in the rain, Vessis are my go to shoes by my door. Check them out in the link below and get your own pair of vessels. I promise you, you won't regret it. Go to vessi.com seaboystv or use code CBoysTV and get 25 off each pair of adult Vessi shoes. 25 bucks off and free shipping to the US Canada, Australia and New Zealand. Thanks, Vessi. Now back to the podcast.

[B]

I think it's not as bad, but like if I had to choose between you guys giving me a bowl cut in my sleep or dyeing my hair blue, I'd take the blue just because I'd be like, it's more funny, more out there. But the bowl cut, I feel like it's more repairable. Like if you have a bowl cut right here, you just fucking buzz it up a little bit and you can still have a nice haircut. If you have your blue hair, it's completely blue down to the roots, you're gonna have to full on go bald. That's what I'm saying. And also like blue hair is more memorable than a bowl cut. Some people just run that, dude. And people do run the like.

[C]

What do you mean more memorable than a bulk? I guess, like but being a thumbnail.

[B]

With a blue hair or.

[E]

But then when you. But keep in mind, I think I got a bowl cut like three times. Nobody asked me why. Don't ask me why. The last time I did it was just wait, maybe it was the second time. Either way, I remember I got A bowl cut. Because I thought it'd be so funny. And I was going to surprise you guys, but we were filming the Christmas, we were buying toys, and I was wearing a beanie the whole time, and I pulled my beanie off and, like, I don't even think anyone laughed.

[B]

Like, they were just, like, expecting this big unveil.

[E]

Yeah, kind of. And it was bad timing.

[C]

And you were like, yeah.

[E]

Everyone was like, oh, when did you do bulk? Yeah. What? Nice.

[D]

Cool.

[E]

Well, let's wrap this video up and then. Yeah. Why'd you do that?

[C]

Maybe just put that beanie back on Mike.

[E]

Yeah, so I definitely made a mistake there, but that's fine. But as far as. Again, like I said, I did it three times. Just so many people, you know, tag me in the Oliver tree. Just like anyone gets tagged in anything. Ryan gets tagged in a bunch of Jet Ski stuff.

[A]

Like, still hurts.

[E]

Still hurts.

[A]

Such a dead horse, dude.

[E]

Actually, yeah, I mean, it's.

[C]

Any offers?

[B]

No, dude, if it makes you feel any better. And. Well, I. I feel like my boat's probably not in the same category as.

[A]

Your Jet Ski, but yours is also a large.

[B]

Nobody. Nobody wants to buy it.

[A]

Nobody wants to buy a boat. And.

[B]

Yeah. I put up on Facebook. I put up on Facebook and. And was just like, oh, well, you know, maybe someone will want it. And I. I even, like, lowered the price quite a bit lower than. Not quite a bit, but, like, lower than I bought it for. And they're not gonna have to pay sales tax because they're buying from private party. And only people that were biting on it were just kids trying to talk. And I got so annoyed of just being hit up by kids literally harassing me to talk. And, like, they would, like.

[A]

But isn't it pretty easy to tell? Like, yeah, it's. Normally, it's just like, no, I know.

[B]

That's why I was leaving. And then this one kid kept asking, like, hey, when can I come see this? I'm like, bro, you aren't buying. Like, it was just this kid. Like, a little kid.

[E]

You can just tell.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And then I knew he was a follower because, like, I went and looked and he followed me and. But he was six. Yeah. And that. So I ended up just taking it down. So I still have it, too.

[E]

Well, you can totally took the ad down.

[B]

Yeah. Because I was just sick of getting harassed by it. Nobody was looking for it. I didn't have that good of pictures, so I don't know. But clean it up. Speaking about water sports, today we went to U Motives dope. And got to build our Centurion for next year. So they. U. Motors and Centurion are working with us and basically, like, sponsoring our ride for next summer and giving us, like, a demo boat to use for the. For the summer. And we got to pick out whatever boat we wanted and fully customize it. However. However we want. We could have done a pink boat with, like, yellow interior. We could have made the ugliest boat.

[A]

I told Joe we were gonna do a green boat with a red interior, and she didn't say anything. And then she saw me.

[B]

Please don't.

[A]

Yeah, she saw me in the dish. She's like, hey, are you. You actually going to. Are you still thinking about the green with the red? And I was like, no, that was a joke. And she's like, oh, thank God. I thought you guys were serious.

[E]

Well, that's kind of what I wanted to bring up was like, some of the. I forget his name, but one of the finance guys there, he. They've all been kind of having fun customizing boats that maybe, like, they had. He's like, look at this. This one's crazy. And it was, like, black, pink, and green. It looked like, you know, an articat, like, for a. They look like. Like a chick 600.

[C]

Just like a retro. It was cool, neon green.

[E]

And how they were pushing us. They're like, yep, you guys should really go loud, really loud on this. Yeah, they were shown, but I'm like, that is not going to resell. And I think that is a part of this. So, I mean, we're not going to tell you what colors we did, because.

[A]

I didn't.

[B]

I think we can unveil it, but.

[C]

Yeah, you're right. Can we unveil the.

[B]

The price of it?

[C]

The price. Okay, so keep in mind, they. They said basically, come in, design it, pick whatever boat you guys want, and then use the entire summer, and then we'll sell it at the end of the summer. Same. Same process.

[B]

Go through. Get a new one off. Yeah.

[C]

And so they were like, seriously, go all out. Get the biggest one that you want.

[B]

So we're. Whatever you like. Whatever one you want. Like, whatever color.

[E]

And we still were like, okay, yeah.

[B]

We want to do them dirty or nothing.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

So.

[E]

So, right.

[C]

Luke, the guy making the. The boat with us, the salesman was going through and optioning it out with everything, and he was like, oh, do this, do this.

[B]

He basically just put whatever you guys think is.

[C]

Is good.

[E]

But we were.

[C]

Guess what the final total was.

[A]

Ryan, it's a 26 foot boat.

[B]

Yeah, 26 and a half.

[C]

It's yacht.

[B]

26 and a half.

[A]

I am gonna guess 265.

[B]

No, no, that's low. That's low. Low.

[E]

Add an extra 100,000. No, no.

[C]

Oh, no.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

Jesus Christ. 320.

[E]

But still.

[C]

What? That's a nice suburb house.

[A]

Yeah, I'm sure a lot of really fancy boats are. Are that price.

[C]

Of a really nice boat these days.

[E]

I think when we were customizing it, that's what I had stuck in my head. I'm like, let's just do something that looks incredible in a good way, not in a loud way. And then it will sell and everybody will be happy. But to preface this, Ryan's boat is very large. It's got everything you could ever ask for as far as awake and fitting people. But it's 23ft. We were gonna go for the 24 and a half foot, which would have been CJ. We were set on it. Oh yeah, I guess the same size as CJ's boat. Big boat. And then he's like, you're not doing the 26 and a half.

[B]

Yeah, I was like, I kind of was leaning towards the 245, but he kept like. Like I'd do the two. 26 and a half. I was like, jesus. Like.

[E]

And then we started envisioning ourselves.

[B]

Whatever. We just like fuck it, I guess. Like, might as well go big. We're not paying for it. Yeah.

[E]

So you like yacht certified means a few things, I'm sure. But we can have as many people as we want on it.

[A]

Yeah, as long as you're not overweight.

[B]

Capacity.

[E]

Oh, there is. Okay.

[A]

That's what it is. It's a weight capacity, which I honestly.

[E]

I think is going to be more people than obviously if we wanted to, we could get.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

People overweight, but so big.

[C]

Like you could fit 35 people on there. We've had like 28 on yours.

[D]

True.

[B]

It's another three and a half feet.

[A]

That's true. That is crazy.

[B]

Which is also wider than then, which.

[A]

Got to give a huge shout out to you motors for that. And working with us, we bought a couple bikes there and Centurion.

[B]

Yeah. But anyway, so that was cool. So we got a golf ball bandit.

[E]

Yeah, he's got a name now.

[B]

Yeah. So for those of you guys who don't know already Friday morning, some random ass dude this was. So he did it right. He like reversed all the way in in his truck.

[A]

It's like he'd been here before.

[B]

Reversed in, hopped out Just cool as a cucumber. All by himself. Puts his tailgate, was already down and just goes. Grabs this giant bucket, dumps it. Golf balls. Probably 500 golf balls.

[A]

So many.

[C]

A lot of golf balls jump, go.

[B]

All over the parking lot. Cool as a cucumber. Just turns around, walks right back in, gets in his car. Like, it was, like, so weird. Like, the way he was moving was, like, just weird. That's what. Like, it didn't seem like a prank to me, And I hope it is.

[C]

Seemed a little malicious.

[B]

Yeah. So do you guys think it was malicious?

[E]

I don't. I don't know.

[C]

I. I say malicious in, like, kind of a joking tone.

[B]

No, it wasn't. No.

[C]

Maliciously dumping golf balls.

[E]

Like, it's kind of.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

You know, it's.

[B]

But at the same time, I feel like. I personally feel like it was done because he doesn't like us. Like, it was like, I don't like these guys, so I'm gonna do this kind of thing.

[A]

That's what I mean by inconvenient.

[B]

Yeah, but that's the thing. It wasn't. Like, if he would have thrown the golf ball through a window, I'd have been like, okay, that guy's got a problem with us. Yeah. But, like, I still can't decide.

[A]

Dude, can you imagine my terror pulling into the parking lot and seeing golf balls everywhere and all of our cars outside? My car outside. I'm like, yeah. Oh.

[B]

Brian texts me. I go, oh, no. I thought someone came in and was like. Or something last night. So I go and get on the cameras, and I see this guy pulling in and doing that, dropping the golf balls. Yeah. So this guy is on loose. He's still at large. We have police, the sheriffs. Not the state troopers, though. They're not helping us. And the FBI. The FBI helping us find this guy. He's on the loose.

[E]

Well, dude, the other, like, little part that I figured out while I was cleaning him up was some of those golf balls were, like, these random spongebob golf balls, which I'm sure other people can buy. I'm sure I'm not the only people.

[B]

I don't know. I think it would be just you. Probably made by Nickelodeon.

[C]

Probably.

[E]

I mean, they were a gift. But I remember the golf course that I've used those golf balls at and lost. And then they show it back in our driveway. I did. I did.

[A]

That's what Evan was kind of like, guys, does it have to be someone from a golf course? But it was such an impossible amount of Balls to acquire if you don't work at a golf course.

[E]

So that's kind of where I'm at.

[C]

Like, range balls or anything like that.

[A]

I don't think we're like.

[C]

Like, somebody picked those balls out of a pond or something. Like, they had to go to extreme lengths to get that many golf balls.

[A]

I would believe so.

[B]

I have breaking news. I might have. I might have said some stuff just to carry the story on, but I have a actual lead on who the guy is.

[C]

Okay.

[B]

So, as you guys know, I've been posting about it all weekend, trying to make, like, get some kind of tip. Like, this guy, here's this truck. And there's a few people that would respond. They'd be like that. Not necessarily on my DMs, but people in the area, hey, I saw that truck driving by the cormorant store the other day. Hey, I saw that.

[E]

Whatever.

[A]

Small of a town.

[B]

One of my buddies who works at you. I suppose it's fine to say you. Motors on Pelican, they're having new sheds being built, like storage units. And one of the crew members working on the construction there is the guy. He sent me security camera screenshot of that guy pulling in with the red bucket in his back.

[E]

Red bucket?

[B]

Yep. And I was like, that's him. And he said, yeah. And there's also a bunch of golf balls, like, around where they were working. So we know the guy.

[E]

He's the golf ball bandit. What do you expect?

[B]

So we should invite him.

[C]

Reckless golfing with us.

[B]

Dude, he might be too. Reckless, dumping golf balls and shit. Who knows what he'd do if he had a golf cart. Probably dump those, too.

[A]

I'm just still easy.

[B]

I'm used. Yeah. So that's my thing. So it's like, I finally. I know where I can find this guy. We just got to go over there while they're working, and we'll find him. Unless he quit, because now he knows we're onto him. Which I didn't want to post that I have a lead because I was afraid maybe I'd tip him off. But, you know, it's like, the severity of that prank. We don't know if it was, like, actually a mean thing or if it was something just to be funny. But even if it was a mean thing, it's like, we can't really respond with, like, retaliation. We can't retaliate with something worse than that, you know? And so if it's funny, it's like, you can prank them back. And if you're Even if it was mean. Even if it was mean, I want to prank him back too, but. Yeah, well, there is things you can do.

[C]

What's worse than dumping a 500 golf balls in somebody's parking lot?

[B]

Dude, pennies.

[E]

True, because I. Yeah. Picking them up.

[B]

We dumped a thousand dollars in pennies.

[A]

A thousand dollars.

[C]

What if we did this?

[B]

What? We slash his tires?

[C]

Okay.

[B]

No, no, no.

[C]

What if we set up like a lemonade stand on the corner?

[B]

I like that.

[A]

Who's gonna work it though?

[C]

Fat kid.

[E]

Oh, yeah, that's right.

[B]

The only person suitable to work.

[C]

And we sell all the golf balls and we split the profits with the guy.

[B]

Why are we splitting them? No, we should do is sell those. Sell the golf balls. Sell the golf balls for 20 bucks a pop on the website. We profit from it. And we're like, ha ha, who's the winner now? You know? We're like, thanks for the free inventory. We just made $10,000.

[C]

Okay. Actually.

[A]

All right, who's buying them golf balls?

[C]

Here we go. We set up the lemonade stand with the fat kid on the corner right.

[B]

Across from where he works, and we stare at him.

[C]

No, we start selling these golf balls.

[B]

To our friends to. Oh, my God. We list golf balls for sale, 20 bucks, and we just start selling them like hotcakes to a bunch of people that we already had lined up. He's like, what the fuck? Why did I dump these things? We're like, yeah. He comes up, hey, what's going on here? We're like, oh, some guy just dumped all these golf balls in our front lawn. So figured, might as well just sell them, man. People really want these old golf balls.

[C]

Okay, that is an option. That's not what I was thinking. But we start selling them. The guy comes, he's a golf. He's a golf ball maniac, right? He can never drive past golf balls.

[B]

For sale, so he's gonna probably buy them.

[C]

So he's gonna come in and go, hey, I see you're selling three for 20. I'm interested.

[B]

Boom.

[C]

Sting attack. FBI comes out of the. Out of the reeds. Get on your hands and knees.

[B]

Okay, I was thinking we sell. Sell it back to him. He comes back, dump some more. We basically repeat the cycle, keep making money, paying money. Yeah, it's a money glitch. Like on a video game.

[C]

That's a better idea.

[B]

It's going to take a little bit of time, but we'll be able to build it up.

[C]

What if our fat kids catch on?

[A]

They cut us out Pay them well.

[C]

They start cutting out.

[A]

They start selling golf balls on the side.

[B]

No, but seriously, I do want to, like, I want to prank him back, but it has to be something comparable and light hearted. Like, I don't want to do it, like, maliciously. Even if. Even though we don't know that he might not with us, or hopefully he was just pranking us. But also, I'm not really a big fan of, like, getting pranked by our subs or just anyone like that. Like, there's not really any purpose to that. And now we know our security cameras suck dick and we're getting new ones now. We actually have a new system getting installed next week. So by the time this goes live, we already have like, 4K. Shit. We're gonna zoom in on your face, like, screenshot it, blast your license plate. Yep.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

Actually, no funny business.

[B]

Yeah. And so we'll actually be very, very secure because this guy is no joke that's coming over to put all these things in.

[A]

I just still am confused.

[B]

Yes. That's why I also. I want to ask him, like, why'd you do it, dude?

[A]

He's living in my head rent free with the. Just like, if he came in, like, poured gasoline on our lawn and killed.

[B]

Our lawn, I'd be like, okay, it's obvious that guy does not like us.

[A]

That makes sense. He was trying to kill the grass. He came in and keyed the cars. I'd be like, he doesn't like us. He wanted to key the cars.

[B]

Maybe he's just a real. He wants reckless golfing three.

[A]

That's what I wondered too.

[B]

And that's what I really have just concluded from it all.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

That's the only thing that makes sense.

[E]

And even if he didn't, we're gonna take it as an opportunity to do so.

[B]

Absolutely. Yeah. I don't know. Ultimately, it was pretty exciting for me. I found it fun and, like, I thought it was funny. Like, but even if it was mean, it, like, gave me some, I don't know, excitement.

[C]

Say.

[A]

I just.

[B]

The inner, like, otherwise things become. Well, I got another.

[E]

The inner 12 year old came out of me and I was just, oh, my God, why was I so stoked that we have unlimited golf balls?

[C]

Yeah, I know.

[E]

I don't even know how to go.

[B]

Text back in the group chat. I'm buying a new driver. Everyone else. Everyone else is like, oh, what's happening, Mike? Everyone's like, what is going on? Like, who would do this? Do you think they're mad?

[E]

Like, what?

[B]

And then Mike just responds, I'm going to buy a new driver today.

[E]

I was excited.

[B]

So, speaking of people leaving us gifts at our shop when we came back from heydays. So there was a cassette tape.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

To our door.

[A]

Well, that was to the door. I thought someone gave it to us.

[E]

Hey, I did, too.

[B]

No cassette tape taped to our door. Like, so they came while we were gone. Taped it. I like, what the frick?

[E]

Like, we. I tried playing it, but I couldn't find any.

[B]

No, it's on there. You probably have to rewind it. You have to rewind it because I played it.

[E]

I'm just saying, like, I don't know what we have.

[B]

Yeah, well, let me tell you the story, because I did. So we got back from Heydays. It was late, right? It was dark. And I'm like, what the heck? Why is this a cassette tape? And, yeah, it's kind of creepy. And it's taped to the door, and it just says, seaboy's TV mixtape.

[A]

No, I'm just.

[B]

Believe me when I. When I listen to it. Yeah, you should listen.

[C]

If.

[B]

If you're thinking it was Ryan, you would really laugh when you hear it, because I would literally be in tears watching Ryan sing this in person.

[C]

It's so.

[E]

It's live, so that's like. I was like.

[B]

It'S not songs uploaded onto it. It is a guy singing. So he made.

[E]

I want to listen to it so bad for.

[B]

He made two songs for us. First off, this guy needs. We should, like, at least try to help fund him. Because if you. If you're an artist and you're putting your. Your new hit single on a cassette tape. What the are you doing, dude? It's 2022.

[C]

I think I'll just have a different market. CJ, no one uses cassette tapes.

[B]

Cars don't even come with that anymore. So I had to look around. Keep in mind, it's dark. And now I'm like, okay, this is kind of creepy. And I'm looking around the parking lot, like, what do we have that could play cassette? And I'm like, the ranger. It's, like, tucked back in the trees, like, where it gets, like, real dark. I'm, like, walking across the parking lot now, holding this cassette tape with the cassette. And I'm, like, looking around because. Because I'm like, what the. This is so, like, it was just weird. Super weird. And I'm like, is this guy in the trees watching me? Like, is he trying to.

[A]

Probably jerking off.

[B]

Well, exactly. Who knows?

[A]

Seeing a man handle cassette, like, that.

[B]

Well, you don't know, dude. There's a lot of creeps out there. There's a lot of creeps out there. So I, I go and I get in the ranger, close the door, lock that. I'm like, imagine someone open the door. So I turn the car on, put the cassette in, obviously, so I can play it and start playing the song. And it's like a song talking about all of us. Like it has like a moment for Ryan. It has a moment about Ken. It has a moment about Ben. Says something about Evan's ego.

[C]

It does?

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

It says Evan's head getting too big.

[E]

Okay.

[B]

No, I don't know.

[E]

I'm just straight up though, like.

[B]

But that's exactly how the song sounds. The way it sounds.

[E]

Like, I gotta. I'm gonna order a cassette player so we can listen to it, dude. Or is it like that bad? I'm not.

[B]

I wonder if you want to get one plug.

[E]

That's fine. I don't want.

[A]

Everybody has a label. Yeah, it's copywriting it, dude.

[B]

I don't know. I just, I think it was a.

[C]

Nice gift, but still whack as don't come to our shop.

[B]

Yeah, it was creepy to me. More so I.

[C]

It would have been less creepy if.

[B]

It was even like a cd. But like the cassette tape really was like, I was like, who does this?

[E]

I think the one I cassette, yo.

[B]

And it was a full grown man that was singing it.

[E]

And like the one upside that he has is that we're talking about it because honestly, simply because it's on a cassette tape.

[B]

No, it was just different. I never had that happen.

[C]

Happen.

[B]

We've had a lot of things kind of weird things happen at the shop, but never that. And I, I, I think what was really creepy is I didn't know what was going to be on this cassette tape. You know, I didn't know if it was some kind of hit piece on us. I didn't know if it was gonna be something really up. I think I didn't know what I was gonna get. And it ended up just being a guy singing a song. But I wonder if we.

[A]

Maybe it was a golf ball.

[B]

A small blip. I think we could probably play a small blip over this right here. Is that mean? I don't. I'm not saying in a mean way. How bad is it? You guys will have to just listen to it. Yeah, we'll go listen to it after this. And we're gonna, we're gonna record it just from the car, I guess. Because I don't really know exactly how else we would get a cassette onto the podcast. So we'll just record it with like a voice memo or something and then put it in. Maybe we'll even film our reaction.

[E]

Yeah, we'll just all pile up in the ranger.

[A]

So that'll be at the end.

[B]

I just don't want to be like a making fun kind of thing, because no matter where you're starting in your singing career or whatever, I, you know, I respect it. You gotta start somewhere, and it's all up from there, you know? So. C Boys TV mixtape this is such a podcast exclusive. Pretty cool design. Way better than obviously a CD or an iPod or an iPhone.

[F]

Get my plans done by the time I hit the kitchen I've made my decision Today is going to be only fun Throw my plans out the window Just chilling with the coating now Kicking up my feet in the sun Caller boys over variety ideas now the YouTube video's done. How does it feel to be irresistible?

[E]

Irresistible how does it feel.

[F]

To be so free? So free how do we live? Wild is the vibe here Living in.

[C]

The sea sea Boys TV that's kind of fired. Jerry knows the words.

[F]

Been with the lambo Rhyme with the mopar toolbox Getting into the joke can't find Micah. That's because he's sleeping. He is still not awake. How does it feel to be irresistible? How does it feel to be so free Open how do we live Wildest survival here Living.

[B]

See Boys tv.

[C]

I like it.

[B]

I like it. You know what? It's less creepy. It's less creepy when I'm not in the. In the back of the woods listening to this by myself at night.

[A]

I like it.

[B]

Yeah, this is actually pretty good. The second time through was good.

[C]

All right, what's the next one?

[B]

Irresistible dude, this is gas.

[C]

We should use it in a video if you can get it. MP3 version.

[B]

Put it on MP3.

[C]

I could have here.

[B]

Wild is the vibe here as the what? Living easy se Voice tv All right, next song. Here we go, guys.

[A]

So that was. How does it feel? This next one is lifewide Open.

[F]

Life wide open in the moment Dedicated trucks are rolling Loud pipes, cars, bikes. Long nights haven't had so much fun in my life now if I paint a picture with the microphone and not a paintbrush Imagine all the images flying off of the pages Make a living off for losing Making music's dangerous Problem is the probability is low to make it Looking down the road to see what looks like it's actually fire this Is fire. Bikes, long nights. Haven't had so much fun in my life. It's a dream. But the scene sure isn't the same as mine. Rowdy boys pushing limits.

[B]

Honestly, I like it.

[E]

With them.

[F]

Dirt bikes. Lambo, the Tesla Mustang, Midnight, slow down, smoking. Do you see the tires? Smoking, rolling to be out taking pictures on their phone.

[B]

I take back everything I said, this shit's lit. Good job.

[C]

How do you record onto a cassette tape these days?

[B]

Anyways, back to the podcast, as that one dude from Fitment Industries once told us somewhere.

[E]

But yeah, it does, man.

[C]

You really take that.

[E]

That's a good inside joke there.

[C]

Ryan had a good point, though. Could it be the golf ball bandit mad that we didn't.

[B]

That's. That's. No, it was my point. That was my point that I mentioned earlier. I said. Oh, did you say that too? Because you said that earlier when I was.

[A]

It just came out through my mind.

[E]

If the golf ball bandit brought that.

[B]

I said that off of the podcast.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

If he brought that mixtape. That he has to be the most intricate, oddly thinking, right, Pranker.

[B]

Well, that's where I was. Like, two weird things. Like, these are both relatively at the top tier of our strange interactions here, and they've happened very close to each other. Maybe he's mad because he thought, I give him this cassette tape. They're gonna bring it to freaking Little Wayne's Young Money Records, get him a record label.

[C]

That dude's got. He's gonna blow up confidence in our.

[B]

He's gonna blow up quick. And he's like, what the taking so long? It's been a week. I'm gonna go and kind of like the mob does, you know, you go ruffle up some feathers over at the. At a place to get some going. So he's like, let's go dump some golf balls. Possibly they're two the same or they're too different.

[A]

Dude, what is he planning?

[C]

We need to get Russ.

[B]

Nothing, dude. But, yeah, we're gonna have to get some security. We need freaking Russ from heyday. Let's pop a picture up of this kid. I freaking love that kid. He's awesome. I followed him on Instagram because he kept saying, like, I'll be your security. I'm like, dude, you're probably like, 12. But you know what? Sure. We got to start somewhere.

[C]

That's not what he was saying originally.

[B]

He wanted to be our security bro.

[C]

No, he wanted to be a part of the group, and he want he. At any cost. At any cost. And he wanted to know one. How much it would cost.

[B]

He was trying to pay.

[C]

Yeah, he's trying to pay originally, and.

[A]

We got to pay Evan.

[C]

We were like.

[E]

I said. I said. I'm like, sorry, Russ. It doesn't quite work like that. And he goes, how'd Evan getting. I'm like, well, I mean, he didn't pay point, but, yeah, he had a good point.

[B]

And then.

[C]

And then he was like, well, I'll do anything. Anything you guys need. And then I think we were like, well, we could use security here at. Hey.

[B]

Yes. Like, maybe he took that job serious.

[C]

Maybe you could just, you know, make sure people aren't. I think Mark was maybe like, I'm not sure. People aren't touching the Lambo. And then Russ goes, like, a vest on.

[B]

He had, like, a reflective vest on. Like, he was. He must have been working there or a volunteer or something, and people were listening to what he had to say. He was just.

[C]

Yeah, he. He'd be standing there, and then people would, like, get close or, like, take a picture with it. And Russ would go back up.

[E]

Yeah, hey. I said, you're our security guard now. And it does kind of sound like. He goes, I'm your bodyguard. I'll tackle anyone. And I was like, yeah, he would. Let's just keep an eye on the.

[C]

Lambo and the sematran.

[E]

Yeah, just keep people off. And then he immediately starts. All right, you can't take a look, but just back up.

[B]

We put Russ over there. He's standing out outside our shop in the golf. Golf ball bandit shows up.

[C]

We have Russ wearing a security guard costume.

[B]

Or out. Or uniform. Uniform. Sorry.

[C]

In the golf cart.

[A]

It might be a costume.

[B]

Russ would be. He is actually an awesome security guard, and he's only going to get better as he grows older.

[E]

This is true.

[B]

This is gonna be, like, a moment in his life. And he's like, from here on, I was like, I'm gonna be security when I grow up.

[C]

The best of the best.

[B]

People tell me that I'm going to be an awesome security guard, dude.

[E]

He's gonna be, like, Post Malone's bodyguard.

[B]

Like a young project. Did you guys see what happened to Post Malone, bro? He was up on stage doing some show, and he, like, there's, like, a hole, and he didn't see it, and he fell into it and, like, hurt himself. Like, he broke his ribs and, like, it was, like, awkward in the show. Yeah. Like, the music's playing. He's, like, going. He's, like, being all friendly with the crowd, Steps off This thing just goes, bam. Like, hits his ribs on the other side of it. And he's like, up on there, like.

[A]

Like, literally.

[B]

Yeah, like, screaming. He's like, ah. And like, as I'm sure it hurt really bad. And people are just sitting there like, filming them on TikTok.

[C]

But that was traumatic for the people in the front, though, right? Like, what did we just witness?

[B]

Right? Well, yeah, and then the music was still playing. I was like, this motherfucker's lip sync. And then they cut that. Yeah, it was the backtrack, whatever, but they cut that and then that makes sense. He wasn't lip syncing. He just had the song playing lightly in the background. So it was a backtrack. But yeah, then they had to cut the whole show. So.

[C]

Dude, shout out. Post it.

[B]

He Russ there, Dude, I don't know. Russ would have caught him. Dude. Russ would have had his back. He'd been up on stage like. Like, Post Malone's trying to, like, touch people's hands and like. Like, get the crowd going. Rush, like, back up, back up, back up. He's the best dude. Best security guard. We put him out there with a paintball gun.

[A]

He just started taking every car that comes by.

[B]

Yeah, they're just driving to work on the road.

[C]

Yeah, Ryan, so are you off the caffeine now or what's going on? Because you wouldn't even drink Arnold Palmer.

[B]

This.

[C]

This can of Arnold Palmer was in the fridge over there. And Ryan was like, oh, I can't drink that. It might have caffeine in it. Yeah, what's the deal about.

[A]

Basically, I was feeling sick all the time because all I would do, I would get here at 8:39, crack, or drink a coffee on the way in, have that for about three hours and go, hmm, I'm thirsty. And then I would crack a clutch, drink a clutch, and I go, that was good. And then at about 3, I'd have a Mountain Dew. And it was just like all day. I was just hammering my body with caffeine and I was only getting more tired. It was at like 3 o'. Clock. I could hardly stay awake.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

And I'm like, what the heck? I had 2000 milligrams of caffeine this morning. How could I be tired?

[B]

If you have too much caffeine, it can make you feel like. Like, dude. Yeah. Because I remember when I was in high school, some, like, older kids that were in the weight room were like, oh, you don't use pre workout. You gotta try this. And I think they were Punking me because they gave me like the most insane pre workout. And I'm pretty sure the dude put like two scoops in because I think I know he put two scoops in. And the one dude that was like first all in on the prank, I was like, oh, you're doing two. And he's like, yeah, yeah, he's got it. I drank that, dude. I felt like something was wrong with me. Like I had to like lay down or what. I felt just super sick. Like I was going to throw up like all this. And I didn't drink coffee or like really any caffeine besides for pop back then. So like. But yeah, which I think it would make you feel like that.

[E]

And there's such a thing as an extreme amount, an extreme intake at one time that'll definitely. And then you're talking like you got. You're just over time, you're like just.

[A]

Always having it always happening. I just felt like I have that.

[B]

Same problem though is like if I feel slightly tired, oh, I better have more caffeine. And then I'm like, oh, I better have. I keep thinking like, if I have more caffeine, it'll bring my mood up.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

My excitement and my energy. So I keep thinking like, oh, I better just drink more. And I think it ultimately makes me feel shittier. Or like in slightly kind of a trance, if I put too much into.

[A]

My body, it almost just feel like. Yeah, it's just weird. I felt like I never woke up during the day. I just like felt like I was.

[B]

Probably gonna reset, dude.

[A]

So that's why I did it. I cold no caffeine starting this morning. And God damn, did it do sound good today. It was like I think o' clock and I was like, oh, to me.

[E]

There'S difference than like sodas and I.

[A]

Don'T have to go cold turkey.

[E]

But because I don't also, I don't perceive you. I don't think you do because I don't see you going, I can drink Mountain Dew. So that's going to be my caffeine intake.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I'll drink 340 dues a day.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

I hate to say it, dude, but.

[E]

I don't think you would.

[B]

I don't know if drinking a Mountain Dew will make you feel better.

[A]

No, it just.

[B]

I think it will maybe temporarily make you feel better. Like sometimes I'll be craving a pop, which typically that happens if I drink pop. Once I start drinking pop, it's. It makes you crave another pop.

[A]

Exactly.

[B]

It's the sugar.

[C]

But.

[D]

Okay, update to the. The mixtape that was left on our door. Which door was left on?

[B]

The middle one.

[D]

Okay.

[B]

Is the guy.

[D]

This is fucking weird. This guy comes in with a scooter. A legitimate scooter.

[A]

Moped man.

[D]

No, not moped man. It's a blue one.

[C]

Wait, like.

[B]

Okay, put this up on the screen. We just have downloads, guys. We have breaking news. Download Cassette guy is not the golf ball.

[D]

Guys, up.

[B]

Guys, I'm not kidding you. There's a lot of. And I. I think, you know, that was a really. That guy was doing just a nice gesture. I thought that was cool. They wrote a song on us.

[A]

I.

[B]

But there's just a lot of interesting stuff that seems to happen around here. Evan, are you ever scared at night? He's like, not until now that you say that a lot of cars that.

[D]

Just pulled in our driveway. Did it loop and then pulled out?

[B]

Yeah, I think people think it's some kind of tourist spot. I'm like, bro, get out of here. You don't know for sure this isn't.

[A]

The golf ball bandit.

[E]

I mean.

[B]

Well, I'm glad he did this during the day. It'd be even scarier if he did at night. So you can see the ranger tucked way the back.

[A]

Oh, that's where that was.

[B]

Got a helmet on.

[A]

What in the world?

[E]

I'm not gonna lie. It's a sick scooter.

[B]

Dude, this guy's old. He's older.

[C]

Full screen it, you guys.

[B]

I can't wait for you to listen. Well, I guess in this point in the podcast, you would already have your reaction to how it sounded.

[A]

Dude, you can tell this cassette was important to him because he kept it in the back of his pack.

[E]

Yeah. Not in the pocket. Tapes it to the door.

[B]

Okay.

[E]

And he just drives in circles. That was like a decoy. It's just to confuse us.

[A]

Dragon knee.

[B]

Oh, he's maybe just saying, hey, if you need a new R6 crotch rocket guy, I can be your guy. I can't wait till we get our new security cams. I'll be able to zoom right in on that. Not that he's a. But any. Any of you, like, Abby picking your nose out there or something? I'll see it.

[E]

Ev.

[C]

Jerking off in the bushes.

[E]

All right.

[B]

Yeah, no, I do feel you, though, on that caffeine thing, Ryan.

[A]

Yeah, I just. I'm hoping it makes me feel better. I know I could probably go really extreme and, like, do like, no gluten, no caffeine, no. All these things. But there's just absolutely no way I can do it. So I'm gonna try caffeine and see if I get a little bit of natural energy back.

[B]

And I think you will.

[E]

As far as you are cold turkey. And if you're going no caffeine, but you can't do you like, let's say. Okay, the same day I'm going to start, like, working out, no caffeine, and then, like, let's say also no gluten. Then you almost, like, don't realize you're.

[A]

Like, fuck all this.

[E]

Well, maybe that too difficult. It's like too much at once, or. Yeah, I'm sure you'll be feeling really good, but you don't know how good.

[A]

I guess each one makes you feel.

[E]

Yeah, I don't know.

[A]

But. And then. So I was going to grab an Arnie Palmer today, and then C.J. was like, those have caffeine in it. And I was like, really? And then we looked it up, and it's very minimal. But I just. I did it for the.

[B]

I wasn't saying, like, you can't have that. I was just saying, you were telling me literally a minute before that, hey, I'm done drinking caffeine. I've done the whole day without caffeine. And then you went to grab that. I was like, you know, those have caffeine. Like, I didn't care if you drank it. But yeah, you know, I was just telling you those have caffeine in it.

[A]

I have drank, like a half gallon orange juice today, though.

[B]

That's.

[E]

That's a lot of orange juice.

[B]

It's sugar, I think, is what really ultimately makes you feel like shit.

[D]

There's gonna be.

[B]

And once you start. Once you start eating sugar, it's like, very addictive is what I find. And typically, I eat pretty. Pretty clean. Like, I don't drink a whole lot of pop and I don't eat candy. Oh, that's what I mean by. I eat pretty clean. I. I at least avoid that kind of stuff. But let's say I go and get Sour Patch Kids one day and I eat them. I'm like, wow, those are kind of good. But I felt like after I ate them, but then the next day I might see him. I'm like, I might get Sour Patchkins again. Like, you kind of cross your mind. Like, it starts getting. And same with pop. Like, I. I picked up, like, some just root beer to have at the house just for something else to drink.

[A]

Other than beer and water.

[B]

Yeah, exactly. That's what I was thinking. But then I started drinking that, and then I was like, oh, I should pick up some Mountain Dew put at the shop. Like, you start craving it, and you start drinking them more often. Whereas, like, we've had Mountain Dew in our fridge because Ryan drinks them and Evan drinks them a lot. And I'd never even crossed my mind. But once you have one, I feel like you gotta. Like, it kind of hooks you.

[E]

Oh, definitely. Once you start leisurely drinking sodas.

[B]

Yeah. Well, they say also sugar is, like, highly addictive. I think it's one of the more addictive things. And just from my experience, no, doctor, I seem to feel shitty if I have a lot of sugar. Like, I could be drinking beers. And. And as our grandpa says, ben, drinking a beer is better for you than a pop. He's told me that since I was a kid. So I've just stayed to that, you know, but said that.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. And he is.

[C]

He's extremely healthy.

[B]

Yeah, He's. What? How old is he?

[C]

82.

[B]

Yeah. And he's out here doing whatever he wants, so. But yeah, that's. That's my piece on it.

[A]

I'm going on 12 hours awake, and I can feel a caffeine headache coming on, though.

[E]

Like, that's gonna be a thing.

[A]

Like, I just feel like I have a headache. But good news. I'm going to Zarbusam, get a margarita. Yeah.

[B]

So we got the bikes playing tonight, boys. Oh, Monday Night Football. So we gotta watch that.

[E]

Wait, I did have something else to say about the Vikes, too. This is just a random thought that I had.

[B]

They're one and.

[E]

Oh, they're one and. Oh, we.

[B]

Sorry, I hate to just interrupt, but. Because obviously, the game now has played set.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

So hopefully they won.

[E]

Yep. But, yeah, like, they won. They played against the Packers. We always love that game. They won by, like, 14 points. Some 20.

[B]

Yeah, whatever. Like, it was a. You kind of blew. Everyone was just, like, beat them by a decent amount.

[E]

This year's the year. And I'm like, whoa, slow down, slow down.

[B]

A lot of people are, like, talking super bowl and shit. I'm like, bro, we won. Like, listen, I want the super bowl just as bad as anyone I know, but we got to take this one game at a time type of thing.

[C]

Right?

[E]

I'd be lying even if I wasn't like that. I'm like, this could be our year.

[B]

This could be our year.

[E]

We won one game, so this would apply to us. I know the Browns never win. There's a.

[B]

We've never won the super bowl, there's some other teams never won it.

[E]

A lot of the people around here kind of are in their feng shui. A lot of people really like to drink, so, I mean, they, like enjoy the games and stuff, but there's not a whole lot else to offer.

[B]

There's country folk out here and there's a lot of. Lot of older gentlemen around here that have watched the Vikings since they were a little kid. Like my grandpa, he doesn't live around here, but like both sides of my grandparents, like, they had watched every Sunday or whenever the Viking you would watch. And they've watched for 30, 30, 40 years, you know, and. And they've never won.

[E]

So I was gonna say, like, if the Vikings or a team that has never won won the super bowl, like, like mental health of all the guys that watch or girls that watch would like, genuinely increase.

[B]

You're right. They perform better at work, I think. Like, like, there would be many full grown men that would just shed a tear. Like, they would be so happy. Like, here's another standpoint on that. So I used to be. I would watch every Vikings game. I haven't. I've slightly fallen out. I watch them whenever I can. But like, back growing up and in like high school especially, even college for my one year or whatever it was. But isn't it weird how we care so much about something that we're not even involved in? I'm also in this category, but it's like, I'm not on the team. I don't benefit anything from them winning, but I'm like, mad if they lose, happy if they win. Like, you're so involved.

[E]

Extra mad if they lose to a rival team.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. But I guess now I think about it, it makes sense because it's just something to be involved in and be into. And it's super fun to watch, dude.

[C]

Yeah, it's crazy how much sports you flick emotion.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And like, yeah, I've said that about my friends. A lot of my college friends are crazy into sports and they follow every game. They've got multiple TVs in their apartments, and they are so pissed when they lose and happy when they win. I'm like, why do you guys care about something so much you have no involvement in and no control over? No matter how much you cheering on, they aren't gonna win. But now they started sports betting and now I understand. Yeah, if you got money now those guys are. They're making money, dude. I'm like, how much? How much you guys betting? Some are like, Oh, I bet, you know, $10 or $50 a week or something like that. Like, you know, pretty. Like, pretty reserved.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Reserved amounts. Like, it's. Yeah, get. They get the fun out, but it's not dangerous. And some of them are betting, like, a couple hundreds of dollars a game.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

And I'm like, you making money, though? And they're like, yeah, I win. You know, most times, you know, when.

[B]

I lose, maybe this could be our side hustle that actually works, at least for me. Playing football, we've been trying to figure out another way to make money, because we can't seem to do it in any other way.

[C]

Dude, if I start investing or if I start gambling in teams.

[B]

Oh, my God. Dude, you should just start betting on every team other than the Vikings. So whenever the Vikings are playing.

[E]

Yeah.

[B]

Ben bets on them. They lose, Ben loses. The rest of us win, and the Vikes win the Super Bowl. 2023 champs.

[E]

I can find you.

[B]

No way.

[C]

One of you guys could fund me?

[B]

I guess I'd chip in for the greater cause, but then I feel like we're losing, too. So then maybe, like, it wouldn't be as. I don't know. No, no, no, no. I feel like. No, it's something about your money being invested.

[C]

I 100% agree, and I know that's exactly how it would go. And next thing you know, I would check ESPN for once in my lifetime, and my face is. Would be plastered all over it.

[A]

We're going to try that in history.

[B]

So maybe not value Ben so much. Like, listen, you want to win, bring this guy in and have him bet on the other team, bro.

[C]

They'd be bringing me into the Super Bowl. They'd put me in, like, a.

[B]

Like a pence teams trying to buy.

[E]

You for, like, just extreme amounts.

[C]

We will give you a million dollars. All you have to do is just invest 100,000 of it betting against.

[E]

That's why I wonder the. The amount of money. But we should have you bet against the Vikes for a game maybe tonight. I don't know how it is to.

[B]

Say, let's just see how it goes.

[E]

We should have you bet. We'll do it for a video 100.

[B]

Just go find someone in the bar. I don't think you should.

[E]

Oh, no, you should just bet on, like, an app. But I like that, too.

[C]

We'll do it for the true. Oh, I can't.

[A]

Yeah, I know a couple bookies, though.

[E]

Yeah, that's what I thought.

[B]

That's what I thought.

[A]

I've never used them Yeah, I know.

[C]

But no, I don't even know what that means.

[B]

You need a bookie in order to.

[A]

Like, a bookie person who places the bet. You and I take a. You and I bet in Minnesota.

[C]

Minnesota?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

It's super illegal. Like, being a bookie is not a legal activity. Oh. They make tons of money doing it.

[E]

Because they commissioned, you know, what, do.

[B]

They go across the border or where's illegal?

[A]

They use like a VPN and post it on some. I don't really know how it works, so.

[C]

Oh, my God.

[B]

My.

[C]

Like a bookie is basically just like a drug dealer.

[A]

No.

[E]

Yes.

[C]

Like, they are taking the risk for.

[B]

You because technically we're not taking the risk.

[C]

Yeah, he's the one he's gonna prop.

[E]

Because we're obtaining a bet that we should not have.

[C]

Yeah. And it kind of just falls back on the bookie.

[B]

I. I don't know. I guess it's a way to bet more. So it's just a way.

[A]

It's just a way to bet.

[B]

Yeah, it's a way to get involved in gambling. Because if we tried betting on a UFC fight and you're in Minnesota, it won't work. And like, I've even tried downloading. Well, in my. Theoretically, I've tried downloading, like, VPNs, and.

[E]

That'S why Johnsonville brought.

[B]

Hypothetically. I've tried downloading VPNs to see if I could bet on some fights, but it still doesn't work. So if we want to. Yeah. And I was just like, whatever, I don't care. I'll just bet against whatever people are around me.

[A]

But theoretically.

[B]

Hypothetically.

[A]

Hypothetically.

[B]

But we should go to Vegas and bet tonight. Yeah.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Let's do it.

[E]

Let's go.

[A]

See ya.

[B]

We're hitting it.

[E]

We're gonna go listen to that mixtape.

[B]

Anyways, this was a really good podcast. Thank you, guys. Subscribe like, and we will see you next week.