Ryan is A "Psycho", Cj & Bens Inheritance, & Ken Hates His Gifts

Summary

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Life Wide Open with CboysTV Podcast Summary

Episode: Ryan is A "Psycho", Cj & Ben's Inheritance, & Ken Hates His Gifts
Date: May 5, 2026
Hosts: CboysTV (CJ, Ben, Ryan, Ken, Evan, Micah, Jack, Spenny, etc.)

Episode Overview

This lively episode blends CboysTV’s signature chaotic humor, deep friend-group banter, and authentic behind-the-scenes stories. The crew covers everything from awkward family inheritance mishaps and animal anecdotes, to organizing their largest-ever Octane Fest event, random bathroom stories, dating show ideas, and the age-old question: who’s actually the “psycho” of the group? With lots of laughs, teasing, and surprisingly real talk, this episode gives listeners a hilarious window into their lives, friendships, and work behind the CboysTV content.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. CJ & Ben’s Inheritance (00:54–06:13)

• CJ and Ben both unexpectedly removed from their grandfather's will due to a mix-up with legal names ("Kelvin" instead of "CJ").
  • Ben shares the story of family confusion over their names on the will, leading to them both being booted from potential inheritance.
• Family Joke: Inheriting Mango the Parrot
  • "The joke in the family was always, if grandpa passes away, who gets Mango? …CJ and I would get Mango, shared custody." — Ben (03:36)
  • Mango, a notoriously old and foul-mouthed parrot, passed away after a house fire. Both hosts reflect humorously on the significance (and challenge) of inheriting such a pet.
• Evan is inheriting a parrot from his girlfriend’s family, leading to a tangent about pet animal personalities (parrots, snakes, etc.).

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Notable Quotes:

• "It's his money. If he wants to light it on fire, do it, dude. It's your money." — CJ (05:55)
• "Mango had a lot of life left. …the issue with it is Mango was kind of a douche." — Ben (03:35)

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2. Ben’s Birthday Dinner & CJ’s $100 Cake Antics (08:24–14:50)

• CJ’s “entertaining” restaurant stunt: Ate someone else's birthday cake with his bare hands for $100, leading to laughter, some disapproval, and the return of the money out of guilt.
• The group reflects on public antics, buyer’s remorse over dessert choices, and the unexpectedly long 4-hour dinner.
• CJ’s perspective: Wasn’t proud of earning the $100, just wanted to entertain.
• Ben: “Just an entertainer.”

Memorable Moment:

• "I walked over, grabbed that whole piece of cake with my hands in the nicest restaurant in the area and just started eating it." — CJ (11:56)

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3. Tug of War Event & Fan Interactions (16:15–23:00)

• Behind the Scenes: “Man vs. Machine” Tug of War Video
  • Talk about the logistics, recruitment (expecting massive, strong men but getting a spectrum of fans), and how far some traveled (even from Canada and West Virginia) to participate.
• Crew’s pride in fan dedication and desire to make events worth the journey.
• The unique joy of gathering subscribers for big group activities.

Notable Quote:

• "For a lot of people that are real die-hard fans, just being able to show up here—even if you're here for only a few hours—what an experience for them." — CJ (22:24)

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4. Octane Fest Launch & Event Details (23:12–33:04)

• Announcements and Hype for the Inaugural Octane Fest:
  • Details: Camping at BIR Raceway, drift competitions, jet-ski watercross, car/truck shows, concerts (with Quad's performance), and various meet-and-greets.
  • Emphasis on creating an immersive, all-weekend CboysTV experience rather than piggybacking on existing events like Heydays.
• Fun twist on Quad’s performance: Donut-throwing at Ken’s Cybertruck determines length of Quad's setlist.
• Concerns: Range from Ryan’s nerves about performing live to the team’s (lack of) drift-driving skills.

Quotes:

• "We're trying to keep GA and camping as open as possible. Plus Friday and Saturday night there will be a concert, which is pretty lit with an opener by Quad." — Ben (27:13)
• "I'm going to be up there [on stage] for f***ing hours." — Quad/Ryan (28:00)

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5. Shop Life: Jack’s Lightning McQueen Tesla & Group Roasting (38:12–47:14)

• Jack debuts his Tesla wrapped in Lightning McQueen livery.
  • The crew debates whether it’s “sick” or “the equivalent of a bowl cut.” Opinions divide, but the consensus is that it’s memorable—and content gold.
• Discussion about ball-busting as a rite of passage in the crew.

Quotes:

• "Jack wrapping his Tesla in Lightning McQueen is the equivalent of me getting a bowl cut." — Micah (41:04)
• "I'm glad to be getting made fun of now because it means I'm a part of the crew." — Jack (48:00)

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6. Toilet Humor, Sh*t Stories, and Crew Annoyances (51:00–53:59)

• Evan’s notoriously casual attitude about “sharting,” not cleaning himself up until convenient—to the gang’s horror and amusement.
• Other stories: Accidental breaking of the Life Wide Open neon sign, shop equipment damage by outsiders, the “who broke what” blame cycle.

Memorable (“Gross”) Quote:

• "You had poop in your underpants. … Shart, it was a shart. People do that, and they have to just carry on with their life." — Evan (51:00)

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7. Dating Show Concepts & “Ken’s Bachelor” (97:00–104:12)

• Debate and brainstorming on whether Ken would ever do The Bachelor; group floats the idea of a mock/real dating show for Ken.
• Discussion about the low success rate of reality TV dating shows vs. real marriages.
• General roasting about who would thrive, and what plot twists they could throw in (“Ken Island,” “Parental Control” remakes).
• Ken remains adamant: “I just couldn’t be on one of those shows. …I think they’re kind of lame” (103:01).

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8. Group Labels & Who’s “the Psycho” (77:55–82:26)

• Self-awareness segment (prompted by teasing Ryan as a “psycho”):
  • Ryan: “Just trying to be more positive and less psycho. …But if you do something a few too many times, you're just labeled that forever.”
  • The crew fast-labels each other: sarcastic, spaz, yapper, chiller, and “locked-in comedian” (CJ).
• Many compliments for CJ’s recent funniness and timing.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

| Timestamp | Speaker | Quote | |-----------|---------|-------------------------------------------| | 03:36 | Ben | "The joke in the family was always, if grandpa passes away, who gets Mango? …CJ and I would get Mango, shared custody." | | 11:56 | CJ | "I walked over, grabbed that whole piece of cake with my hands in the nicest restaurant in the area and just started eating it." | | 22:24 | CJ | "What an experience for them. ... Just being able to show up here." | | 27:13 | Ben | "Plus Friday night and Saturday night there will be a concert which is pretty lit with an opener by quad." | | 41:04 | Micah | "Jack wrapping his Tesla and Lightning McQueen is the equivalent of me getting a bowl cut." | | 48:00 | Jack | "I'm glad to be getting made fun of now because it means I'm a part of the crew." | | 51:00 | Evan | "You had poop in your underpants. … Shart, it was a shart. People do that, and they have to just carry on with their life." | | 77:55 | Ryan | "Just trying to be more positive and less psycho. ... But if you do something a few too many times, you're just labeled that forever." | | 81:08 | Ben | "You know who he gets that [comedic timing] from? His mom." |

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Timestamps for Main Segments

• Inheritance/will stories: 00:54–06:13
• Cake incident & dinner stories: 08:24–14:50
• Tug of war casting & event: 16:15–23:00
• Octane Fest details: 23:12–33:04
• Lightning McQueen Tesla roast: 38:12–47:14
• Bathroom/sharting humor: 51:00–53:59
• Dating show brainstorming: 97:00–104:12
• Crew labels/"who's the psycho": 77:55–82:26

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Final Thoughts & Episode Tone

This episode is peak CboysTV: irreverent, self-deprecating, and full of inside jokes, but with genuine moments about family, growing older, and changing perspectives. The constant back-and-forth banter and the complete lack of a “fourth wall” (where even listeners are let into the running gags and group therapy) make this both hilarious and oddly relatable, whether they’re planning massive events or razzing each other about their most embarrassing moments.

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Subscribe for more unfiltered laughs, crew chaos, and behind-the-scenes looks every Tuesday.

Transcript

[A]

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[B]

Liberty.

[C]

Liberty.

[D]

Liberty.

[C]

Liberty. Jack wrapping his Tesla and Lightning McQueen is the equivalent of me getting a bowl cut.

[A]

Would you do the Bachelor, Ken?

[B]

A bachelor that's actually here for love. How do you feel about it?

[E]

I feel awful about it because I know there's going to be some other kind of twist that gets thrown into it.

[F]

How can I get out of having to perform? Maybe. What if I blow up my Corvette?

[G]

Was there something else we wanted to

[B]

talk to Jack about?

[A]

There is.

[B]

It wasn't looking good for you, Jack. Did you guys hear my Kelvin story last night?

[C]

Well, I mean, is it. Is it kosher to share on the pod?

[F]

Calvin, your cousin.

[G]

You're in a different area code.

[C]

Ben's birthday last night, I thought the same thing. Like, the one thing I love about getting together on a birthday is, like, the congregation of it. But when you're at a table as long as we were at Are we live right now? Are we rolling Many. Don't be a noob, bro.

[F]

When we start talking, we're typically live. Okay.

[C]

But, yeah, we were pretty far down the table from you, so maybe you want to wait for your cousin Calvin

[H]

to get back here.

[B]

I don't know if he wants to hear this story again. I kind of ruined his night by

[C]

telling him he's on the shitter now.

[F]

So you tell it quick before he gets here.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Long story short, my grandpa, who is getting older, not Grandpa Ron, other grandpa, he's looking at, like, his will or something. I don't know the context of it, but for some reason he put CJ on his will as Kelvin. Which is CJ's, like, biological, like CJ James, his legal name. Nobody ever calls him Calvin. Like, since he was born. I don't think he's just always gone by cj. Right?

[F]

What if he was ever Calvin?

[B]

When he got in trouble, my grandpa looking at his will was like, who the hell is Kelvin? And he made some calls and got Kelvin taken off.

[F]

So CJ got removed from the will?

[G]

Yeah.

[A]

Holy damn.

[F]

I wonder what he did to deserve that.

[C]

Well, it was a miscommunication from the.

[G]

Changed his name, apparently.

[B]

Well, no. And then my grandpa and my grandpa was telling this to Jeff, CJ's dad.

[F]

Yeah.

[B]

And he was like, that's CJ. He's like, oh. Oh, he's fine.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

He's like, well, it was a lot

[C]

of work to get him off, so we'll figure that out later.

[F]

Oh. So CJ got removed from.

[B]

I told CJ this last night, and I think I kind of ruined his night.

[F]

Are you on the will?

[B]

I think I was kicked off, too.

[F]

He was like, who the hell is Benjamin?

[B]

For all the reasons. Well, if Kelvin's getting the boot. Well, if I'm going through all this work of kicking people off.

[F]

He removes everyone from the will except for. I don't know who got to stay, actually.

[B]

I think everyone but cj.

[F]

Everyone but CJ and you, by the sounds of it.

[C]

I'd be bummed.

[F]

But don't you. You guys get something right? That he's been telling you guys for a bunch of. Bunch of years. His parrot or something is animals.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Rip, actually.

[G]

Oh, Rip.

[B]

Mango. My grandpa was the one that had the house fire three years ago. this point, his house burnt down, and in his house he had a parrot. RIP Mango. Mango was his name. But parrots lived to 100 years old, very long time, and Mango is like 45 years old.

[F]

Oh, shit. So he was just getting started.

[B]

Mango had a lot of life left. And the joke in the family was always, if grandpa passes away, who gets Mango? And every. Everyone was in agreeance that it only made sense that C.J. and I would get Mango shared custody. I don't know if Mango is going to be a shop pet or what. And so the issue with it is Mango was kind of a douche.

[F]

Yeah. Wasn't he kind of a dick? Wasn't he a biter?

[B]

He was a biter and he had a mouth on him.

[F]

Foul.

[B]

He would have got along well here, actually, but held his own. He'd walk in and he'd be like, hello.

[F]

Really?

[B]

Yeah.

[F]

What? How do you teach a par. I guess parrots, I mean, learn how to swear.

[G]

Just as easy as Nikki's mom has two parrots and they're actually moving. So I'm currently inheriting a. Oh, wow.

[B]

Parrot.

[C]

Wow.

[B]

And how do you feel about that?

[G]

Oh, I'm thrilled.

[B]

All right, well, that's good, Ev.

[E]

I bet.

[F]

What's your parrot's name?

[G]

Oh, I should know. So actually, we are getting the cool one. They have two one's like A green one. It's a little smaller. That one's pretty chill. I'll actually let him, like, run around on me. He'll sit on my hat and hang out. And then the other one only likes Nikki. Nikki's mom, Nikki's sister. Other than that, you just bite you and it hurts. I mean, he. He's like, twice the size. I don't know.

[B]

Yep. That's how Mango was. He wasn't. Mango wasn't. No. Mango was green and orange. But he wasn't allowed out of the.

[A]

The.

[B]

The cage, really.

[A]

He was. He'd walk around. He had his.

[B]

Oh, maybe. Maybe just when people weren't home.

[F]

It's like a bad dog that you put them in the garage.

[D]

Sorry to hear about the will.

[A]

Oh, you guys talked about that?

[C]

Yeah, I did.

[B]

I told them because they were on the other end of the table. They didn't hear the story last night.

[A]

Yeah, shoot. I missed it.

[F]

How do you feel about being removed from the will? Not.

[C]

It can't be good.

[A]

Yeah, it's kind of funny. Like, I can see why people think it's funny. Yeah, it does feel kind of. It does kind of feel weird because it's like everyone else is getting something, and I guess I'm not.

[B]

I don't know. I don't know if I am either. I think. I think I was kind of roped in with you. Like, he started making calls, and he was like, well, if I'm kicking one off, I'm kicking them.

[C]

I picture you guys. Like, you don't want to be too pushy about it. Like, hey, I hope it was just a mistake. We'd love to get back on, but if you're too pushy.

[B]

Nah, what's done is done. I just want to do whatever he wants to do.

[A]

I don't really care. I mean, it's his money. I think he can do whatever he wants with. If he wants to light it on fire, do it, dude. It's your money. You earned it. I don't deserve anything, you know? Like, I mean, that's the truth. No one's entitled to anything, so.

[C]

That is true.

[F]

And. And so that's how we got on the subject of Mango, is that he was thinking about getting another bird.

[B]

He did get another bird, apparently. Yeah. And this was. This was news as of pretty recently. So, Yeah, I don't know where that one's going if. If it needs to be relocated one day, but we could build, like, a

[F]

really big cage in here, and then if Evan's bad, we could lock him up in the cage.

[B]

Bad idea.

[G]

Between their beaks and their claws, they can cause some damage.

[B]

Yeah, they can.

[G]

I think many bloody fingers from these birds.

[F]

Are they stinky?

[B]

I don't think they smell good.

[F]

Are they loud?

[B]

Yes, very loud.

[G]

I would say they smell as much as a normal bird. Years ago, for some reason, I had a couple of parakeets living in my house. Also incredibly stinky.

[B]

You have a zoo.

[G]

I had snake. None of these animals ever meet. It was always who was living at my house was deciding it was good to have one had a snake. And then we had some parakeets there. But I'd compare them all to, like rabbits, hamsters, birds. They all kind of have that same stank.

[A]

You know what doesn't stink is snakes.

[G]

Yeah, you're right.

[A]

They don't really stink. I was surprised by that when I was holding the one that you had

[C]

brought here for that video itself. I feel you.

[A]

It didn't stink overall.

[C]

It's habitat again.

[A]

It probably does get stinky. Yeah. But after that, I was low key. Like, it'd be kind of cool having a snake. It would eventually kind of wear off on me, so I don't want to get one. But the more so the shock factor. I like the idea of, like, you come to my house and I have a big six, seven foot boa constrictor.

[B]

Yeah, it would definitely have shock factor to it.

[A]

Not free roam, but, like, that's the thing. Like, I just would feel bad keeping them in a little container. Like, what kind of life is that?

[E]

I think you should do it.

[B]

Just.

[E]

Just buy it.

[A]

Ken and I think you should hang my samurai sword on your wall. But I guess we both have two different opinions.

[E]

It's getting hung tomorrow.

[H]

Okay.

[A]

I went over to Ken's house this weekend, and samurai sword was in the box in the.

[D]

In the closet, tucked away on the top shelf.

[F]

He did pull it out to show the guest, which was cool, I thought,

[A]

you know, that's how I found out it was in the closet.

[G]

Did you cut anything with it, like meat and cheeses?

[E]

No, no. Just took it out, swung it around a little bit, and then put it back.

[F]

As you do.

[D]

As you do.

[B]

As all good samurai owner owners do.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So I had a birthday party last night and we all went out to dinner. Thanks for coming, boys. Appreciate that.

[F]

You're welcome.

[B]

But at the end of the dinner, I look at the end of the table and desserts are coming out. And Spenny got a massive cake.

[A]

That's what I wanted at first.

[D]

I got the cake. And everybody's like, oh, banana cake. Oh, that's kind of whack.

[A]

Well, no, no.

[D]

Everybody was hating on it.

[A]

You said you were sitting there next to Evan. You're like, I'm looking for a banana cream pie. And you go. And you go.

[B]

I think he just like.

[A]

And you go. And you go, does that come with nuts as well? Like, he's asking the waitress this. And Evan goes, I got that back at the shop for you, Spy. And I was like, childish. So then, you know, Spenny orders that. And then I'm sitting there. I'm going back and forth between that and this chocolate peanut butter cake comes out.

[D]

And CJ's eyes light up.

[A]

I'm talking about. He's.

[D]

He's locked in on this thing coming all the way to the table.

[B]

And CJ is a man that has a immediate buyer's remorse on everything he purchases, right? So he gets the chocolate cake as soon as he says, I'll take the chocolate cake. Oh, fuck, I should have got the banana cream.

[A]

You guys are jumping ahead if you want to jump ahead. Before I ordered, I asked the waitress. I go, which one should I get? The chocolate peanut butter one or this banana? I want to know, is this, like, more chocolatey than peanut buttery or is it like. Because I want. I like peanut butter, but I don't like things super chocolatey for buyer.

[D]

And I was in the wrong for. And she had nuts on it.

[B]

We were just a percentage.

[A]

It's not about that. I was just. We were just cracking like. It's funny. You said banana cream pie, and then you ask her, but does it have nuts? You're asking for the full package, as in, you know, if you can use your imagination. But yeah. So anyway, she talked me into getting this chocolate one. Tell me about how peanut buttery it is. So I'm like, I like peanut butter. But I was literally so close to getting what Spenny was gonna get. So it comes out. Things just the darkest chocolate thing ever. Like, just a hint. Just a hint of peanut butter. I was just like, all right, well, this sucks. And I'm looking over at Spenny. I'm looking over at Spenny, and he's just looking happy as a clam.

[C]

Took that away from you?

[A]

No, Nobody did.

[F]

How's that cake looking across the table, too?

[A]

It looked amazing.

[B]

It's huge.

[A]

So I go over. I walk over.

[G]

I'm like, before you came, Spenny's already eyeing this up, and me and Ken are already getting 20s out trying to get Benny to house this cake with no hands, thinking he's just gonna use. Use his face. Yeah, which that, that would be funny. And that is where you kind of.

[A]

Yeah. So I come walking in, I don't really know why you guys have money out and it down 20. How about 60? How about, you know, the money stacking up on the table. Spenny's looking at this giant piece of cake and I go up to him, I go, spenny, could I have a, a little bite? Cuz I want to find out what I missed out on. I just want a little bite.

[F]

Cj see some betting going on across the table? Sprints over there.

[A]

No, not that part. I didn't really know. So I take a bite and then I'm walking away and spending. Apparently turned down all the money. And Evan goes, CJ, for a hundred dollars, would you eat that with your hands? And I go, absolutely.

[G]

I said no utensils. Which I messed up because what we really wanted to see is face plant in the plate. But honestly what you did was both just as good.

[A]

So I said absolutely. And, and no one ever offers me more than 50 cents to do anything. So I was like, I'm taking up on this. So I walked over, grabbed that whole piece of cake with my hands in the nicest restaurant in the area and

[B]

just started eating it.

[A]

Right, right there.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

It caused a scene. Well, as soon as CJ starts doing this, I'm up filming it, my flash is on and we're just dying laughing because at this point CJ is like double fisting the piece of cake at the end of the table over top

[A]

of my lap, shoving his face a big ass.

[B]

It was a big ass piece of cake. So shoving his face full of it. And then it was, it was pretty much like a spectacle to see if he could finish it, which he couldn't.

[D]

Couldn't do it.

[B]

And then he gave the money back.

[A]

I think I could have. But yeah, I did send it back to Evan. He paid. When I was making a lot of progress, he just paid me cuz he's like he's going to do it. And honestly I could have. I was sitting there, I was like, God, I'm going to be enjoyed the cake. I'm sick. I just wanted a little bite. And I was like, ah, here you go, Spenny. I gave it back to.

[G]

I was too far away at the end of the table. But was there per chance a little bit of negative energy coming from the women?

[B]

No, I don't Think so.

[A]

Some. It sounded like. Some were not very happy about it.

[F]

Not impressed with our.

[A]

They didn't like it. I didn't think it was that aggress. Like that was hardly anything compared to what we normally do.

[B]

We're so.

[D]

I think it caught them off guard a little.

[C]

Felt really bad for Spenny's cake getting deleted.

[D]

Yeah. And I did hear somebody, I heard people down there saying, is that really his whole cake? And CJ's just eating it.

[F]

What's Betty gonna do if you can't have it?

[D]

I was just like sitting there laughing. I was like, I don't care.

[A]

I'll order him a new one. He'll be out in one minute. It was $11. And then I did offer to get you another one, but you're like, no, no, I'm good. And then I gave him the other half back.

[B]

And you ate it.

[D]

The half eate had fingerprints all over it.

[B]

And I did offer to give him.

[A]

And then I paid for it. Anyways, in the end I did love.

[C]

I loved Evan's reaction when you caught a. Just a peripheral of CJ using silver. Cuz at that point he had given up or across the table.

[A]

I was cutting it for Mark. I was giving it to him.

[C]

Okay, well he. Anyway, he laid some utensil into it.

[D]

Ben will be back.

[B]

Right?

[D]

Send it back, send it back, send it back.

[G]

Because I'm, I'm looking at my phone and I'm like, I'm a man of my word. I'm gonna send him his 100 bucks. And yeah, in the time I look at my phone for 30 seconds, set it down, it said like Venmo confirmed. I look up and here he is going into it with a fork. I was pretty upset.

[A]

Here's the thing though, like it was like almost not worth you paying me a hundred dollars over. Like I felt like it was very anti climatic. I didn't feel like I earned the hundred dollars. So like, I don't know, I just didn't. It wasn't like something I was proud about taking a hundred dollars off you. So I was happy to honestly just give it back. And what it was more so just to make. Get some laughs. It was more so just to get some laughs from the boys. And it kind of spiced up the dinner, made it a little bit funnier and more fun.

[B]

But just an entertainer. Yeah, dude, I think my, my favorite part of the whole ordeal was as soon as you started eating it with your hands and Evan watching in enjoyment. He was so happy that someone Took the deal. He goes, no, this is good investing.

[A]

That's what he considers.

[B]

Paul's investing.

[A]

He's investing in a good time.

[B]

I go, you calling this an investment makes a lot more sense of your financial situation.

[F]

I kind of thought maybe our antics in restaurants would speed up our time. I. I figured that restaurants would want to get us out of there and make us skedaddle being. Recognizing the scene. But we were there for, like, four hours.

[A]

I know. I'm so over eating out at restaurants because it takes so goddamn long.

[B]

I don't know.

[F]

Birthday dinner. Yeah, I'm happy to do whatever you want to do, but God damn, we were there for four hours.

[A]

It was too long.

[F]

I don't know.

[A]

I had other plans, and then I had to cancel those. Basically, it's like, the hell are you planning?

[B]

It was like, I want to be either 9 or 9:30.

[A]

No, it's just like, it shouldn't have been that long. It should be like two hours max at a restaurant. But, like, some of these places need to speed it up.

[E]

Problem is we're going places with, like, 20 people. Trying to. That's accommodate for 20 is kind of an undertaking.

[A]

I was trying to go home and watch TV and shit before I had to go to bed.

[F]

Are you holding back on saying Euphoria?

[A]

Well, euphoria, and I'm watching the new Hulk Hogan doc on Netflix. It's pretty good. Or go play Xbox.

[B]

I don't know.

[A]

Just some other. Rather than sit at a restaurant.

[G]

Anything other than celebrate Ben's birthday.

[A]

We celebrate. Sorry, bro.

[B]

I didn't know it was that bad.

[A]

Your birthday is worth three hours max, not four.

[E]

Give it two and a half.

[B]

Well, just the man that we were looking to see.

[C]

What did I do now?

[F]

Every time Jack sits down, he's like,

[E]

oh, want to go pop squat on that couch?

[B]

So you guys would have already seen it at this point, but tug of war. Yeah, it wasn't looking good for you, Jack.

[H]

Well, I think we pulled it off. I think we did exactly what we were supposed to do. And you shouldn't have doubted my team.

[D]

The rope snapped.

[H]

The rope was not supposed to snap.

[A]

I was surprised by that. That was the one thing I didn't expect.

[C]

That was crazy.

[E]

I walked away from that thing with an injury because of the rope.

[D]

Did you hurt Ken?

[G]

You hurt?

[F]

That's not that surprising. Ken's been hurt more, doing less.

[A]

He's got a skinned elbow right now. He skinned his elbow and his ankle. Oh, he has a small skin mark

[C]

on his ankle as well, honestly, for valid reason. But last night, Ken at dinner was rubbing his legs.

[B]

He goes, oh, so sore.

[C]

And I'm like assuming he hit leg day since he does that often. He goes, no, from Poland, was it?

[B]

Were you guys sore?

[A]

I wasn't.

[C]

I was. Valid point though. Like every time that we were pulling a vehicle, like, I wasn't doing the pulling, but you guys were. You're pulling like as hard as you.

[A]

We did go down like a ton of bricks though. When we were pulling in that rope snap. It was like. Like everyone went down quick.

[D]

I didn't go down.

[A]

Yeah, it was because you were not holding onto the rope.

[B]

Yes. Benny was the first guy to be out of the prance off.

[D]

I did. It wasn't even a prance. I knew it was going. I knew the rope was snapping and I was just out of there. Wasn't trying to hang on to a breaking rope.

[B]

That was one of my favorite video bits we filmed in a long time just solely based off of how intriguing it was.

[D]

I had a lot of fun. That was one of the most fun I've had filming for sure.

[F]

Did. The energy you just get. You just get a hundred people that are stoked around. It's just so fun having a bunch of people cheering and whatnot. It was just fun to get a bunch of random people together.

[B]

Yeah. I feel like we could have like gone into town and like ransack the village with 100 people. Like you could move.

[F]

Do any.

[B]

You can move some of the buildings in town, pick them up and move them down a couple of blocks.

[E]

Flip a couple cars.

[C]

That's not a bad idea. Like the next time we have like 100 of our subscribers, give or take something, we should just do something that you could only do with. You have 100 people.

[G]

I think we should do a human chain from our shop to Zorbas. And then we like Chinese fire. Drill a pizza right into my tummy

[B]

or hand a beer down or something.

[C]

I like that.

[H]

I think we use the same exact crew that I got the first time too, because they were so successful.

[B]

Yeah. So when the people started showing up, I guess for the people that haven't watched the video, we did man versus Machine and we wanted to see in a tug of war how many big men it took to stop varying different vehicles. Starting with a golf cart, then a mini truck. And then Ryan Z06 and then our drift truck, the Ford Ranger. The dually Ford Ranger. And then Mike's big ass Ram truck. And then ending with a bulldozer.

[F]

I love how it's now just known as Mike's Big Ass Truck.

[B]

Well, it's got the fucking like seven different syllables to it.

[D]

ARV or what?

[B]

Yeah, whatever.

[F]

Mega.

[B]

So, so anyway, we had, we had 100 people come out and Jack was responsible for getting the people here. And so we're casting, so we're like, okay, make this post out. Thousands and thousands of people sign up for it. So we got a huge list to go through, right. And it was pretty much just solely based off of how heavy these people were. Like if, if they were going to be like strong enough.

[F]

Guys, pick the best.

[B]

Yeah, picking the best, right, to go hold back Mike's Big ass truck. So in doing so we're like, all right, you know, we got people's heightened weights and ages and everything and, and we're trying to put together like a list of big specimens of humans. And we hit the intro and we walk up and start meeting the people showing up. And the first person we met had a broken hand. The second person we met was 14 years old. And then the third person we met was a woman. Not anything against women. We were just, you're expecting, we're expecting

[A]

linemen, 180 pounds to 200 pound men, you know, someone at at minimum about 180 pounds full growing man. You know, that's what we were expecting. Which turns out we didn't even need. But yeah, we were a little worried at first. We're thinking, Jack, we wanted 100 full grown men. If you're going to cast women and children, we're going to need 300.

[H]

Well, people on the, on the Google sheet, in my defense, I'll pop it up on the.

[B]

They lie, dude.

[H]

They were all 180 to.

[A]

They knew what to say. All of them, they knew what to say. Tug of war.

[H]

150 plus pounds. And then also over 18 of course too. And so couple got through the crack.

[C]

Yeah. And even keep in mind like 150 isn't, you know, I think that's a great place to start. But like 150 is still like 12 pounds lighter than me. No, for sure, not big at all.

[H]

You'd be surprised. But like a lot of the people, the majority were not even close to like 150. It was like 150 or less for the majority. But yeah, no, I definitely should have done a little bit more.

[B]

Were you pretty worried a little bit right away?

[H]

Because I being honest, like after you did that and I walked back outside, I was like, dang. Maybe Ben's right. Like we got Kind of a bunch of smaller crowd.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

Smaller crowd speaking.

[A]

They had strong will.

[B]

They did, they did. They came with heart.

[C]

And also, like, speaking of strong willed, showing up with some heart, there are some other fellas that lied in the best way possible. And I don't want to encourage this, but I'm asking where everyone's from. They're obviously all from Minnesota, like, pretty close. And they're like, we're from West Virginia. And I was like, what?

[D]

Yeah, 13 hours away.

[B]

What?

[C]

And flew here. Then there's also some people from Canada and they said they were from closer. And I just love the dedication. They were like, dude, we said we were from your area, we got picked, we bought flights and it was the best decision ever. Like, it was all positive. Like, it was amazing. And they actually didn't flake out. Like, I can't even. Yeah, but it was funny. Like, yeah, they're like, yep, this is like, we made it happen and we're so stoked. But yeah, they said they were from

[B]

DL, but for a lot of people

[A]

that are like, real die hard fans, like, just being able to show up here, like, like, they'll book a flight go. Even if you're here for only a few hours, like, what an experience for them. And we, yeah, we maybe don't think of it that way just because we're just kind of in this, but.

[C]

Right. I think we're. We're constantly concerned. It was like, when we're talking about the event and how we're excited for Octane Festival, that we want it to be worth it for everyone. If you travel across the country to meet us, like, I want it to be worth it for you. And sometimes we're. Our view of that is skewed. You know, them getting to, like, meet us and just check out the compound, probably worth a lot.

[B]

Yeah, we just want to give them a good experience. Good lead in, though, for Octane Fest. So.

[C]

Yes, it is.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

I was asking guys, and quite a few of the guys that I asked were like, yeah, I'm definitely going to make it out. Which was cool to hear.

[B]

Yeah. So we announced it about a week and a half ago at this point, but we are hosting our own event. It's called Octane Fest, in collaboration with BIR Raceway, which is the track in Brainerd, which we've been to for a video before. And then Chris Forsberg, who is bringing all the talent with the drifting in the entertainment factor with all the cars. So this event is essentially replacing what we've done for the last six years by going to the Heydays event that we would go to. And it was like the only meet and greet experience that we'd have kind of all year. And the, you know, if people were like, oh, I want to meet you guys, we'd be like, oh, come on out to Heydays. That's the event that we do every year. We're not doing that anymore. We've sat on the podcast before. We just kind of just outgrew it. And we were throwing like an event inside of an event. It just didn't make a whole lot of sense anymore moving forward. But we wanted to continue to do some sort of meet and greet event. And what made the most sense is if we could just control the entire experience the entire weekend and make it more of like a spectacle for people to come out to, which was like the biggest thing for Heydays. We were just like, oh, I wish that we could do more with this. Right? Like, people are paying their, their hard earned money to come and meet us. I wish that there was just more that they could do, make it like a full immersive Seaboys experience. And so we started talking with BIR and put together this Octane fest. So essentially what it is is it's a entire weekend event where you can come on out on a Thursday and stay till Sunday. You can camp on the grounds of bir. You know, bring your camper, bring your tent, whatever set up in the camping area. And then throughout the weekend, we're going to have drift ride alongs and just drift competition. So a bunch of different professional drifters are going to be out there ripping. And then there's going to be autocross going on on the big race track. And then there's going to be water cross happening. So snowmobile water skipping, essentially. So all the professionals will be out there doing that. Plus cj.

[A]

Hey, I know I'm gonna have to hit some practice laps or something. I already told Big Ranch we got to get that thing, we got to go through it, make sure it's ready to go. Because I mean, the thing was riding on salt water in the ocean, you

[G]

know, we dialed it in last fall when I drove it on the pond,

[B]

so it's literally cherry. Okay.

[A]

I just want to run like a top if I'm gonna be fuel.

[G]

And it is ready to go.

[B]

Yeah, that's why I know they gotta

[A]

practice some turns, not just going straight. Luis, like, just for the record, I'm not a. Like I'm going against racers. Like, I'm Just I think you might

[B]

actually be out there alone. I don't know if racers want to be on the same plan.

[A]

Oh, I probably will be alone because they're gonna go super fast and I'm gonna just be trying to turn and like others be dilly dallying out there. But I'm going to do my best.

[G]

I think in typical se boys fashion, there is no practice. There's none of this. You just got to show up.

[A]

I'll do that too. I mean, I'm just letting you know. What do you want me to do? Do you want me to. To do good or. I'm going to try and do good Many times. I'm going to try and do good.

[B]

And then we're also doing a car show.

[C]

Car and truck show.

[B]

Yeah, car and truck show. So if you have a Lamborghini, you have a Mazda Miata or if you have Mitsubishi Evo. Evo for cj. So any type of car. Right. So you can bring your car out for the car show if you get tickets to it. So there's limited amount of tickets. So if you want to bring your car out, get a ticket to secure your spot. But so there's that.

[C]

And correct me if I'm wrong, the when you buy a ticket for the weekend, it also includes camping.

[B]

Yeah, correct that.

[C]

And that part is huge. Like, you guys bir is massive. So there's not like gonna be a sellout moment. So just get your tickets when you can. But like come camp.

[G]

Is there a VIP camping option?

[D]

There is that.

[B]

Sold out electrical.

[G]

But the free camping option that everyone has access to, it just doesn't have a minute or no. No water, no power.

[A]

Yeah.

[F]

And we were talking with them and basically if we get enough people there, they'll have to open up this other section.

[C]

Yes.

[F]

And they have to like plan for it. So ideally get your tickets in advance because some stuff like the. The car show will sell, have a drift car and you want to drift. That type of stuff sells out. But we're trying to keep ga and camping as open as possible. Plus Friday night and Saturday night there will be a concert which is pretty

[E]

lit with an opener by quad.

[A]

He's going to be going on stage.

[F]

I do not want to do so bad. Like, I don't even. I actually just this morning was like, why am I so anxious? And why do I feel like I'm going to throw up? And then it was like, oh, yeah, I have to go on stage. And after you guys warm up the crowd, who knows what you're gonna tell them to do, like, what if I get booed off the stage, dude, I don't know if my.

[A]

I think people are gonna love you, dude. They're there to see you. I know, like, too.

[F]

And I'm gonna do my best and try to perform, but, bro, I mean, even the best.

[A]

I start practicing, Ryan.

[F]

I started practicing this the minute that.

[A]

Practice your moves. Practice your voice. Yeah, there's no auto tune on that.

[E]

Do you think it's safe for me to share my idea with everyone else? Ben, is this coming out. Is this coming out before that?

[A]

Before what? Octane Fest.

[B]

No, no, Technically this will be coming out on Thursday. But, I mean, we can share it. You'll see it in this week's video on Thursday. We may have thrown donuts at Ken Cybertruck. Ken may have gotten upset with us. We may have done it again, and then we may have done it again after that. So I. Ken was very upset with us. But. But he has came around.

[E]

I had an idea after the fact. We will sell donuts for a dollar a donut.

[F]

Okay?

[E]

And every donut that we sell is how many seconds quad has to perform.

[F]

I'm going to be up there for fucking hours.

[B]

Ken forgot a key part of this, though.

[E]

They get to throw the donut at my cybertruck.

[B]

Exactly.

[C]

Every second. So you'd have to sell 60 donuts just for you to do them.

[A]

I think you do a full set list. I don't know about the. What, are you going to cut a song short?

[F]

I thought I was just gonna have to do my hit single Hummerheart.

[B]

One song, Ryan.

[F]

No.

[B]

People are paying their money to be here.

[F]

Money for a DJ or somebody. Somebody.

[A]

I think you're gonna. I mean, the DJ is gonna be great or whoever that we end up getting for the concert, but I don't know if anyone's gonna be able to be more entertaining than you up there with your hair spiked up and your makeup on, screaming.

[C]

I could, like, help you set up, like, a PR stunt. We could, like, stage somebody that came to, like, riot and take you out. And then.

[D]

I don't think he's listening. I think he went to sleep. I don't think he's listening.

[F]

Realistically, we're gonna sell thousands of donuts.

[C]

I mean, I don't know how many minutes get our hands on.

[F]

A lot.

[B]

Oh, we can make that happen.

[A]

That many minutes?

[E]

Hummerhearts. Like three and a half minutes, which

[F]

is like a 200 donut.

[E]

Basement's right? It's like around three and a half as well.

[A]

Yeah, it's just going to be an awesome event. Like it's one thing to throw a car show. Right. Those are a lot of fun already. But now it's like we're layering so many other just things on top of it. From watercross to quad performing to drifting to drift ride alongs, to us having a meet and greet, to us giving out the golden tickets for certain other things. The burnout competition, it's just going to be a really good time and I don't think we could have a better place to be doing it at than bir and then also, you know, just being able to do it in collaboration with Chris Forsberg, absolute drifting legend.

[B]

Yeah, so. So yeah, CJ mentioned it too. We're going to be walking around handing out the golden tickets. So we're going to obviously have like Evan and Mike for the drift ride along part. So we're going to just be handing out golden tickets to be able to participate with the boys riding passenger. Also, same thing with autocross. Hopping in the passenger seat with all the boys and getting to rip some laps around the track and then giving out golden tickets at the car show event to people that want to be a part of the burnout competition. At the end of the night.

[G]

It's pretty crazy that we're giving out tickets for ride alongs with me and Mike and we literally don't know how to drift. I don't think really we have to perform on stage. No, but I mean, we're in the same boat as Ryan. Really. I mean, I can swing it around our track, but like we've never drove at a different venue.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

I don't think anyone has ever called you guys drifters though, you know, so it's like they know what they're getting into. You know, if. If they don't want the golden ticket, then they can.

[G]

But I mean, I was making a few. Just joking on it.

[C]

Also a legitimate point, but I mean that people would be stoked to like ride on the of pegs on the back of your bike.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So we're gonna be like bouncing around throughout the weekend to do all these different events and you guys can pretty much just watch it happen like in real time. Like as if you're watching a Seaboys video, but in person. Yeah.

[D]

And maybe even might get selected from the crowd to be in one.

[B]

Might happen. So all these events are going to be happening like simultaneously throughout the weekend. So it's gonna be constant action the entire time, no matter where you're at on the grounds. There's going to be stuff happening. We are essentially just going to be bopping around, participating in these events and bringing people that come along on the ride.

[F]

Yeah, the big days are really Friday and Saturday where, like, most of the events are coming down, but you can get in early Thursday camp. You can stay till Sunday.

[B]

Yeah, I'm excited for the camping. Like, nice. Just like hitting the campgrounds with everyone up.

[F]

There's over 200 acres of camping available.

[C]

That's insane.

[D]

I'm going to go pitch a tent

[C]

back there and camp.

[F]

I bet you will.

[C]

That idea. Yeah.

[D]

A sleeping tent, Ryan.

[F]

I bet you will, bud.

[C]

So that's going to be lit.

[F]

What if. What if. How can I get out of having to perform? Maybe. What if I blow up my Corvette in the burnout pit?

[E]

That's assuming that it. It makes it till June. I don't think that thing's going to make it that long.

[B]

Yeah, dude, it's a good point. That thing smokes every time you start it up.

[F]

No, it actually, I think the tug of war might have taken it out.

[C]

Like, it.

[F]

It smokes constantly now.

[C]

It's bad.

[F]

Like, I couldn't even drive it to Ben's dinner. We came over here and I started up and it was smoking, and I

[A]

was like, we can't drive that thing to the dealership. You got warranty, don't you?

[F]

I'm gonna this week, and it will actually be the test if warranty works. I don't know if it's like a gasket of sorts, but I've been looking into it, and the oil was overfilled. And that in conjunction with me driving it aggressively, could have resulted in a crack. Cracked block.

[A]

That's the dealership. They change your oil.

[F]

So we'll see on that. I mean, currently, as it sits, it is cooked, but we'll just. We'll learn soon how cooked it is.

[E]

It still runs now, so it's fine.

[B]

Yeah.

[E]

Check engine light.

[F]

Yeah. Which is really impressive. But it's burning coolant aggressively.

[B]

That's got to be their fault.

[F]

I don't know. And I think there's just absolutely no other things that have. Could have possibly damaged it.

[E]

I mean, maybe the cold start to redline this winter.

[F]

Maybe it could have contributed.

[B]

It probably wasn't bouncing it off. Off the chip for like four minutes.

[A]

They have a rev limiter for a reason. That's true. It's just fine. He did everything that you can do with that car pushing the gas floor. They wouldn't make Them to do that if you're not supposed to.

[G]

If the red line was like a safe fail, Subarus would be like 2000 RPM.

[A]

Yeah, well, that's because Subaru's just got shit motors. But Corvette had Corvette. I mean, come on. Performance vehicle. It's a supercar.

[C]

Them being like, sorry, dude, just based on this video evidence we have of you, like, I'm concerned about the car. And then Ryan's like, boys go half seize on me with this.

[D]

Like, they don't.

[A]

Dude, that's. I think it is because you got your oil overfilled and you were driving it hard, which is made to be driven hard. And that comes back on them. Yeah, yeah.

[B]

I don't know.

[F]

Time will tell. It was warm when I rev bombed it. I rev bombed it for a really.

[A]

He was cracking a joke, but it was warm.

[F]

Like it wasn't. It wasn't actually like I started on.

[A]

So that'd be insane.

[C]

That's what. That's the type of you do with the TC.

[F]

Exactly. And look at how that handled it. 10, 15 years of abuse and it's still hanging on. Bit of a bummer. Especially coming into summer. There's only so many days you can drive between snowfall.

[B]

So, yeah, that does suck.

[C]

That's where you'd hate to see it go down.

[F]

And yeah, it'd be a doozy because that's just not one of those things that it's not a big wrench fix where they're like, yeah, yeah, yeah, we'll pop a new motor in it this week.

[D]

It could.

[B]

To be fair though. They could.

[A]

Yeah, they could, dude.

[G]

Yeah.

[A]

If you want like any kind of mechanic slash labor slash fabricating job done, that takes skill. Those guys can do that. Like that for sure. You start going to other places, you find out how long things take, and you're like, what the. Dude, I got two guys that could do this in two days. If they weren't building a wooden dirt bike right now, they would be able

[C]

to do it by us. I mean, that.

[F]

But even just like dropping off of the dealer, I mean, that's just gonna be one of those things. They're just like, yeah, come pick it up in September. Yeah, you know, I don't have to put winter tires on it and drive in the winter.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

If it is good though, you should cook it at octane in the burnout pit.

[F]

I mean, I'll do whatever.

[A]

What if it blows up and blows through your back glass? I'd be insane.

[C]

Do whatever to it.

[D]

If.

[F]

If it is Running at Octane. Yeah, I'll. I'll rip it hard.

[G]

We could use it as, like, smoke effects for the quad.

[A]

That's true. You could drive it up on stage and then hop out.

[F]

Our sitting there just smoking out the exhaust is my smoke effect.

[B]

They'll say, where's the Hummer?

[F]

Yeah, you're right.

[A]

Do you think you'll sing the gay song that Jack made you?

[F]

No.

[A]

Cute boy staying.

[C]

I thought VR had us modify that.

[F]

Yeah, we modified that.

[G]

Was there something else we wanted to talk to Jack about?

[A]

There is.

[C]

There's someone to you about too.

[G]

I don't mind. I'm aware of that.

[C]

There is.

[D]

Okay.

[B]

Before we completely move on from the octane, though, if you guys do want to go to octane, it really helps us out if you get a ticket in advance. And we're pretty, pretty nervous about. This is like the first. First time doing an event of this scale. So if you guys support us, appreciate it. Get a ticket. Come on out. We're going to do everything in our power to make this the most entertaining weekend. So get [e-mail], hit the octane tab and preserve your tickets.

[A]

We'll put the link down below in the description.

[G]

Preserve.

[B]

I don't know. Preserve, reserve, preserve.

[G]

Either way. Yeah.

[C]

That's presumably June 4th through the 7th. The 5th and the 6th are the hot spot days. Friday, Saturday, we'll be there all weekend.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You can come out for one day or just come out in camp for the weekend, hang out with the boys. It's gonna be lit.

[F]

I'm excited.

[B]

I'm excited too. I'm excited. But yeah, Jack.

[A]

Jack is back to this kid, man.

[G]

Back to the casting coach.

[F]

There's so many things that I'm intrigued on which one this is going to be now.

[H]

You gonna hold it for me?

[B]

Yeah, I'm gonna hold it for you, Jack.

[C]

Yes, sir.

[B]

Dude, I love you, bro. Honestly, you're like one of the boys already. You've been around for what, two months now?

[H]

Yeah, just three.

[F]

Quiver in his voice, you hear?

[D]

Three.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

So you're fired. No, no. You've been around just long enough where now all the boys are just comfortable. You're just one of the. One of the boys.

[G]

Right.

[B]

And with. With that comes savagery. Oh, just a hard time, you know,

[E]

A lot of roasting.

[B]

Yeah. Getting your. Your balls busted. I go to bat for you every time. I do. Do you? I do. A lot of times I. You know, if Evan or Dalton are chirping, I. I always got your back

[C]

I do too, Jack.

[B]

I do. I pulled into the shop today, Jack, and I see your car sitting in the driveway, see, with a new Lightning McQueen wrap on it.

[C]

I came up to you and I, I love it.

[B]

I pulled up and I said, oh, boy, this one's going to be tough. This one's going to be tough. I'm about to go to war for Jack on this one. I think the easier way would be for you to just defend yourself.

[H]

I think it's sick. I think it looks cool. Spenny came in, complimented me right away this morning too. I haven't heard anything negative, so it must all just be behind my back. Did it.

[F]

Did it kind of sound like Jack? Wow, sick rap.

[B]

But in Jack, I just want to say this, dude, you are not the first to go through this. Dalton, in fact went through it so much that we went out of our way. We bought a truck and replicated his rap and made a whole like year long joke about it. And Evan, Evan still doesn't let him forget.

[H]

Dude, I think we should.

[B]

So I just want to say it's. You're not, you're not alone. You're not alone.

[A]

You're not alone.

[F]

But defend yourself.

[H]

I want to see.

[B]

And also don't let Dalton give you a hard time for this either.

[H]

Dude, I think it's sick. I don't care. I don't care if Dalton gives you.

[G]

Just remind them who has a monster logo.

[H]

I will do that.

[G]

Nothing against monster, really, just.

[A]

But what part of it do you think is sick?

[H]

What part of it do you think is not sick?

[A]

I'm not. I'm just more so curious. Like, are you like a big cars fan? Like, are you a big cars fan or.

[C]

Ours is such a good movie.

[H]

Best kids movie of all time.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

I was like, I didn't want to be rude, but I was like, this could have been a prank that he lost and has to run this or he's e either running this by choice or he lost a dealer or I just didn't know what the deal.

[A]

What was like the thought behind it though? Like, was it because Lightning McQueen and you drive a Tesla so it's like electric? Is that why you did that?

[D]

Or Lightning McQueen is gas.

[A]

I get that. But I just thought maybe lightning, like he was trying to coordinate lightning with electric or something.

[F]

I don't know.

[H]

It's a little red car.

[C]

Him.

[H]

All you have to do is throw stickers on it. It's already red. Like I got it comped. I think it's kind of Sick.

[A]

Okay. No.

[C]

Jack wrapping his Tesla and Lightning McQueen is the equivalent of me getting a bowl cut.

[G]

Why would.

[B]

Why would you do that, Micah?

[C]

I don't know. I just, like.

[G]

That's not a backhanded compliment. I don't know.

[F]

Yeah.

[A]

Pop up a picture of Mike with his bowl cut.

[B]

Why would you do that, Jack? Questioning it. All right.

[A]

I thought Mike said it looked good.

[C]

I do, like, like it. And it's like, why would you do that, Micah? I don't know. It's fun. I like to spice up my life. That's kind of at the end of the day, what you're doing. But I was like, jack, dude, I personally like it. And you go, really?

[D]

You actually like it?

[C]

Say that like, I do like it. I do like it. Because at the end of the day, seeing in the background of a video, it's gonna. It's gonna bring comments, people.

[A]

Who's Lightning McQueen car.

[D]

Who's Lightning McQueen?

[B]

Tesla.

[C]

I like it.

[F]

Oh, it's Swaggies.

[A]

Was it like a strategic play? Like a strategic play. You saw how, like, Dalton was.

[C]

Was getting very.

[A]

Getting on camera and stuff for it. So you're like, oh, I'm gonna do a stupid rap.

[G]

Hey.

[H]

I don't know if I want to leave my fate up to the people watching, but I want to know what they actually think of it. Like, if they think it looks dumb or if they think it looks cool.

[G]

Did you overhear maybe some comments from the construction crew this morning? Because not only is there a Lightning McQueen car parked there, there's a freaking Cheeto Raptor.

[A]

These guys got some Y unique ridge.

[B]

They were looking around.

[C]

Like, every time they looked around, they were like. And did you see that thing over there and that thing over there? They were very intrigued.

[F]

Yeah. I was here this morning at like, 8am to let him into the building. Jack's already here. So the two cars next to each other, and they go, nice pickup. They're looking at it. He kind of chuckles. And this boy looks at him and loud. He goes, and the car, too.

[A]

So they're grouping those together.

[F]

He goes, and the car, too. Wow.

[A]

So you just more so thought, let's wrap it in Lightning McQueen livery because it's red.

[H]

Yeah. I don't know. I just think I'm just trying. Watching cars the other day.

[B]

Yeah.

[H]

Realized my car kind of looks like Lightning McQueen.

[A]

Okay.

[H]

Found a guy who wanted to do it in exchange for some. A sponsorship.

[A]

Okay.

[H]

And tinted the whole thing, got the wrap done, and here we are.

[A]

Nice.

[H]

Now I'm gonna Rock it probably for the summer and then see what happens. Take it off and.

[B]

Yeah, that's it.

[A]

Then maybe like Buzz Lightyear.

[B]

Yeah, we'll see what happens next.

[A]

Buzz Lightyear.

[H]

Yeah, we'll see. What kids movie I wrap my car to next?

[A]

Lion King.

[B]

All right, well, I guess we'll leave it up to the people.

[H]

I do actually want to know what the people think.

[B]

Is that gonna be a deterrent? Like, no, you get roasted. Are they gonna. Are you gonna take it off?

[F]

No.

[B]

Because Dalton rocked his for a year.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

He's still rocking it.

[C]

It's hiding, but he's rocking it.

[G]

Rocking it in storage.

[C]

But I will. I would say that. Would you agree with this? That let's say it had aftermarket wheels, which I know cost money. Like, it would look even cooler because, like, right now, the Tesla wheels are just okay.

[H]

Yeah. I don't know what kind of wheels would look cool on. On that.

[A]

What kind of wheels does Lightning McQueen have?

[F]

That's. I'm just about to.

[H]

He has red rims, I think one of them. There's actually some different variations.

[G]

They sell plasti dip at l M. Perfect.

[B]

Yeah.

[F]

You got red. You gotta have red wheels.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

That might be tough, though, Jack.

[B]

I feel like you gotta do something with it now.

[A]

What does Lightning McQueen do? Race. Let's put them in a race.

[B]

Should we?

[H]

Oh, gosh.

[A]

Get him in a NASCAR race.

[B]

Have you ever raced anything?

[H]

No. I was gonna say ev can rip it, but I don't know if I want to do that.

[B]

I think you gotta drive your own car.

[H]

I'll race it.

[B]

Maybe we could put a angle kit on it and put you into the drift event at octane fest.

[H]

What else do you have to do to it, Ken?

[C]

Don't you just need the tuner? You just need the deleter.

[E]

There's something you got to do with that. To be able to disable the traction

[F]

control, you pull a wheel speed sensor, cut a wheel speed sensor.

[C]

I've seen a guy on Instagram, he just has this tuner that can do all kinds of stuff for it.

[B]

How do you feel about us cutting a wheel speed sensor?

[D]

It is supposed to be a race car. That's what you do on race cars.

[H]

I'll be honest. It would be pretty sick to see a Tesla Model 3 Lightning McQueen drifting at octane fest.

[D]

Could do it. Out in the backyard. There's a drift track right here with a big crowd.

[C]

Yeah. It would go crazy.

[B]

It'd be a spectacle. It would be a spectacle.

[D]

You versus Dalton in a Drift off.

[A]

It would probably make more sense why you'd have the Lightning McQueen on it if you were racing.

[H]

What other sense do you need besides

[B]

how sick it looks?

[A]

I don't think it looks bad at all. I was just more so like, what the. Why the Lightning McQueen, though?

[D]

It was just funny because you didn't even tell us and you just showed up and it was like, oh, yeah.

[B]

I was like, when the hell did Jack rap his Tesla Lightning were confused

[D]

because you pulled up and it wasn't like, oh, yeah, I'm getting a wrap this weekend, by the way. And like, you maybe, like, throw us a little bone, but just to show up and see it. I was like, I was not. Yeah.

[A]

I was just more so trying to find the connection. Like, what was the reason? Yeah, but it's. If all you have to say is, it looks cool.

[H]

Yeah.

[B]

Like it for content.

[H]

Yeah.

[B]

Well, it's working already. Yeah, it's working already.

[H]

So I did tell Ryan about it.

[C]

You told me, and I was like, so maybe you told the people that you can trust.

[H]

Well, I was like, do we want to do anything where, like, I pull up with it or not?

[C]

And it was like, why the hell

[B]

would you go to those guys then? No offense.

[H]

I wanted it to be a surprise for the majority.

[D]

Well, it was a surprise.

[B]

Oh, Jack, we could have done. We could have done some shit, bro.

[H]

Well, it's too late now, but I

[C]

think how discouraging it would have been if you're like, here's the plan. And they're like, I know. That's cool.

[G]

Yeah.

[H]

So I was like, I better ask for. Just pull up.

[B]

And everyone just.

[F]

I believe my words were, if that's what you want to do, you should do it. I do pretty clearly remember saying, don't do it for us.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

Oh, yeah.

[F]

But yeah, I mean, is you. As long as you're happy, that's. That's what makes me happy.

[A]

It's not terrible.

[F]

It's not.

[D]

I don't think it's bad at all.

[F]

It's polarizing.

[B]

I mean, we are looking at the real lightning.

[A]

I think it's fun. I think it's fun.

[B]

You know what?

[A]

I got a picture of it.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I think it's fun. It's different. It's a good way to spice.

[D]

The first thing he did when he pulled in was took a picture of it.

[G]

I do think it looks pretty good, but I think Ben kind of touched on it. But, like, you've been around long enough now.

[B]

We're.

[G]

Right away, we. We can't like bust your balls. But now it's like, dude, if can we. You're just fitting in so we're going to bust your balls no matter what you do. It's like you pull up in a McQueen cars going to be a few chuckles.

[F]

Can you get the tongue on the front at least?

[C]

I think that would make it gay.

[B]

That's where you draw the line.

[G]

Speaking of that smile, if you think

[F]

that would make it look worse, then

[C]

can you some eyes on it?

[H]

I thought about it, but I just want to get pulled over all the time, bro.

[F]

If you

[D]

eyes would actually be sick if you threw eyes on it, that'd be cool.

[F]

It's actually.

[A]

You got to watch Cars like every night now, dude. Like, if you're going to be running the Lightning McQueen, like rap, I think you got to be watching Cars once a day.

[C]

That's half as much as I watch it now.

[H]

Not as much as I should for

[G]

having a. I almost said the dumbest thing. I'm like, if you're at the gas station and people come up, you're going to have to have some quotes. But you're probably not at the gas station. Yeah, touching.

[B]

Evan knows a thing or two about driving around a dumb vehicles. You gotta hit him with the quote. Evan's transport is a joke.

[D]

Hey, man. Just so when you know, when you're at the gas station, you need to be quick.

[G]

They're gonna get you.

[D]

You gotta have some quick replies.

[C]

Even though it was like damn near a dad joke in a silly setup, when you're eating the Cheetos, it just killed me.

[D]

You know, These things are pretty good.

[C]

Wouldn't wrap my truck in it, but.

[B]

Well, congrats, bro.

[G]

Yeah, thank you.

[H]

I appreciate it and I'm glad. Sounds weird, but I'm glad to be getting made fun of now because it means I'm a part of the crew.

[B]

Yeah, that's true. It's a good way to look at it. You are.

[A]

That's true.

[C]

Yeah, we're just.

[A]

We're just giving your balls, dude.

[G]

Speaking of taking. Ls spending. You've had a rough couple past. Past few days.

[D]

It hasn't been that insane.

[A]

It's getting your cake eaten.

[B]

Well, it's been popping a bunch of

[D]

tubes tougher than most, I'll be honest. But you'll have that sometimes.

[C]

Well, that's why I was trying to

[B]

get out of more like I'm like,

[C]

did something else happen? Because you call me and go pop three tubes. I'm over three this morning. I'm like, that's bad, but it's not. Means that you. This is the worst day you've had all of 2026. But it sounds like it is.

[D]

It might be.

[B]

Honestly, that's a pretty.

[A]

Pretty good.

[B]

Is that pretty tough?

[D]

Yeah, it's pretty tough. You can't do anything around. If you do anything bad around, ev you hear it for the next month.

[B]

Imagine having a third color on your vehicle. Ryan's still here.

[G]

So we had to talk you off the ledge yesterday because you were gonna leave the course on, like, the 13th hole. We're, like, spending. Just chill. It's fine.

[D]

Yeah, because the first 10 holes, all I did was just get ripped to shreds by all three of you guys.

[A]

Spendy ended up shooting a 98, and he skipped, like, four holes. He was flustered. He was not doing good.

[H]

Yesterday.

[D]

I was over it. I was so over it.

[G]

And then you wanted to run some pool, and I beat you six times in a row.

[D]

Yeah, but it doesn't really count because you had a skid mark in your underwear the whole time.

[G]

And then this morning, you popped three tubes. So I don't know. It's just been a bad. Because he had 24 hours. 36 hours.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

His pants on the golf course, bro.

[A]

He.

[D]

Evan, his pants halfway through in 18.

[A]

COD ran it.

[B]

What?

[D]

Didn't wipe.

[E]

And then midway through your birthday dinner, I get a text from Evan.

[B]

No way.

[D]

Hold on, hold on.

[A]

Jump ahead here.

[C]

Evan.

[D]

His pants on the golf course halfway through a nine. Just didn't go to the bathroom.

[G]

Let me clarify one thing. There's a difference between a shark and a full blown.

[C]

You've had.

[B]

It's funny.

[D]

You had poop in your underpants.

[G]

Shard, it was a shirt. People do that, and they have to just carry on with their life.

[F]

Not since I was 7.

[G]

You just can't drop everything you're doing.

[B]

That's.

[D]

Normally what you do is you go,

[A]

I'd rush to the bathroom.

[F]

Yeah. Damn, Crohn's.

[D]

You go and clean it up. You don't just sit in it.

[G]

I try to act natural. Pretend when you have a baby, it dries in, like 20 minutes. You know it's there.

[D]

When you have a baby and they in their diaper, you don't just say, oh, I'll just leave it for the next seven hours. He's gonna do it again anyways. You go and you clean it up.

[B]

It's a good point. Spinny.

[D]

So then we get to the. We get to the final hole of 18, and he's still running his poop pants. He's still running his poop pants, hasn't gone to the bathroom. He skips the 18th hole and runs to the outhouse, does whatever in there and then comes back to the shop. And how many games of pool did you play with Dalton?

[G]

7.

[D]

Played seven games of pool at Dalton.

[A]

Without changing.

[D]

Without changing. And then I show up and there's some like, some booby lootavelly or some on the tv and he's swiping marketplace,

[A]

sitting on the couch. Sitting on the couch in his same clothes.

[D]

And I walk up and I say, what are you doing? And he's like, just chilling. I'm like, did you shower? And he's like, no, no, I gotta shower before we go for dinner for Ben's birthday. And I'm like, oh, all right. Well, you want to run some pool? And he's like, yeah, sure. So then he runs five games a pool with me and then goes in showers at 6 o'.

[A]

Clock.

[D]

But we started golfing at like 11 and that sharp. Probably happened around 2 or 3 and

[G]

it was dry by 4, but it's

[D]

itchy and just weird. Like that's weird. So gross.

[F]

Just because we're using the same shower some days. What are you using in the shower so I can.

[G]

Oh, that, that green loofah. Is that yours?

[F]

No, that's not my loofah. I don't use a loofah. There's a loofah, the brown loofah. Now which, which body wash are you using? Because I'm not gonna grab that one.

[G]

I don't use the. It's not like a bar of soap

[B]

you don't scrub with.

[D]

Okay, Just a hand.

[F]

The, the scrub to hand.

[G]

The soap goes on the hand and then the cleaning happens. But because there's so it, it immediately.

[B]

Hold on.

[D]

It's not dirty. Hold on a second.

[G]

Soap now.

[D]

So then we go for dinner, self cleaning. Then we go to Ben's dinner and Evan's sitting at the table, he showered

[A]

and in fresh clothes.

[B]

Oh.

[D]

And just runs to the bathroom. And I'm like, oh my God. He did it again. And then sure enough, he texts me five minutes later, my pants again. So then I'm wondering, did you come home to the shop and shower? There's no way you showered twice. So you went to bed with your shitty little butt and it's probably still shitty from dinner last night.

[A]

Shower this morning.

[D]

Oh my gosh, you did. Okay, so you went to sleep with a shitty bum.

[G]

No, but the one at the restaurant. I made it to the bathroom within, like, three seconds, so I was able to do proper maintenance.

[D]

You shit your pants. How do you do proper.

[E]

So you still had dirty underwear at the restaurant?

[C]

Yes.

[D]

And then you wore your dirty underwear.

[G]

Discrepancy between a shirt and a full blown shit in my pants. I'm not, you know, shitting in my pants.

[D]

You might as well shit your pants. There's poop on your underwear.

[B]

Same thing when we're out to dinner with, call it 20 people. Crazy how many dynamics and just different things are happening with that large of a group. CJ's over here trying to make money. Evan's his pants over there. Mike's wife is getting mad at C.J. for eating Spenny's cake.

[F]

Justin and you are talking engineering and

[G]

Ken's sucking down scallops.

[D]

It was a wild night. Maybe we need to get f some baby wipes or something.

[A]

Yeah, I was gonna pour a plug.

[D]

A cork. A baby wipe.

[A]

I suppose you already have a plug. Is it in there right now? It's probably why you have your sharding problem. His plug is already.

[D]

He went. He went to work without his plug in.

[E]

It's the day after he takes it out. He has problems.

[B]

Yeah.

[D]

Jesus, this is gonna be a hard. One of the biggest zingers ever.

[F]

When someone walks up and he says, hey, man, I love the podcast. I'm gonna have to look them in the eyes and say thank you. What do you love about it?

[G]

Well, maybe a good transition addition from my underpants would be to my little mistake I made the other day.

[A]

Your little mistake? Which one was this?

[G]

You have a video of it, Ryan?

[D]

Oh, I still haven't seen this video yet.

[C]

I haven't either.

[D]

I still haven't seen this.

[C]

I'm sure.

[G]

I don't know if that's it.

[D]

Yeah, let's see it.

[C]

Good. But I'm glad to hear we have some live footage of it.

[F]

You maybe just kind of say what happened, and then I'll get the video out of.

[G]

Me and Dalton were ripping a bunch of games of pool. We're playing for hours, and the chalk was sitting on the table right next to our Fluorescent Life Wide open sign.

[A]

It's been there for seven years.

[G]

Been broken only once or twice close to the sign.

[A]

Has it been broken before?

[G]

Yeah, Mike broke it for sure. I just don't know if it was other than that. With a pool stick.

[D]

Come on, Mike.

[G]

Someone did.

[C]

I did.

[G]

Someone broke it with a pool stick once. Okay, I was here, but I didn't do it. But anyways, Dalton shooting. So I like, just kind of back myself into the corner. I grabbed the chalk off the table, hardly bump the sign, which I think the video will show. I hardly bumped this sign, and it just poof. Turns into a pile of body slammed.

[D]

It's not like leaning up against the wall, bro. You literally shouldered the whole.

[A]

The whole thing flexed.

[D]

The whole thing flexed.

[A]

You shoulder.

[B]

Holy.

[A]

Body checks are like a hockey check.

[F]

I think the damn one flexing.

[E]

I don't.

[G]

I'm not even seeing the clip right now, but I know I didn't.

[D]

That you're saying when you explain this to me, you're like, I just literally

[G]

nicked it with you, dude.

[D]

I turned literally with the chalk in

[G]

my hand to see if Dalton's missing another shot, and I bump into it.

[C]

If that would have been a skateboard like this, you'd have cracked her in half.

[G]

Okay.

[A]

I do love your face.

[G]

Yeah.

[C]

You knew.

[G]

I just knew. I knew. It's just like. Like, gosh darn it. And the sign.

[D]

Yeah, he did.

[G]

Getting fixed. I. I'm taking care of that. Mike dropped it off for me. I do feel bad. I don't wanna, you know, just be breaking stuff now.

[B]

You don't want to just be breaking stuff.

[G]

Like, it was an honest mistake. It wasn't. I don't feel like I was being overly reckless. I reached for the chuck. I bumped the sign. It's been on for like five years straight. I think it's maybe more brittle than the day we got it.

[B]

Yeah, you know, it was due for it.

[C]

It was due for it.

[D]

It needed a new op anyways. Those ones were worn out.

[B]

We probably should put that plate that thing in, like, a safer spot. I was thinking that the other bulletproof

[F]

glass, it's probably fine like the Mona Lisa. When you get close to it, a little shield comes up.

[A]

I think it's been there long enough. It's a great spot for it. You want it to be seen.

[G]

So how many years do you think it's been there for it to have gotten?

[A]

Since 2020.

[B]

We put it in the day that we moved in.

[A]

2020.

[G]

Two hits.

[E]

We got that sign in, I think 2019 in the old shop, and then it moved into this shop. So it's been up there for. Yeah, six years.

[F]

Six.

[G]

Because if I recall, the other time it got broke was just from the back swing on a pool stick. Took out one. One letter. I believe that's a pretty good run in seven years cover around here.

[F]

Yeah, I guess.

[G]

Couple letters in that long?

[C]

Yeah.

[G]

I mean, Shred 80 was jumping coaches on a three wheeler, and there's been a lot of chaos has gone on. Yes, with a pretty fragile sign. That's all I'm saying. But either way, I do feel bad about it. I'm getting it fixed, so. Sorry, fellas.

[A]

No biggie. It was an accident. You can break whatever you want as long as you pay to fix it immediately.

[G]

Unless. Unless it's on camera, then it's fine, right?

[A]

That's subject. That's subject. If we're filming a video and it's on camera.

[G]

That's what I meant. Yes, that's what I meant. Filming a video.

[A]

Everything's on camera here. But, yeah, you're right. You know, TP Travis, he's got that rule, like, if you break it and it's on camera for a video, obviously, just fine. But he holds people to it. I was talking to a dude at Freedom Factory and he was telling me how he was driving his Corvette before they jumped it, the one that he won. And he basically, like, slid it down a jump on, like, accident. He was trying to turn around. He slid down and basically slid into some trees down below.

[D]

Oh.

[A]

But it only broke the mirror. And, you know, they were gonna do this big jump or whatever after. So he goes and puts it back or. And you know, it was knowing, like, he broke that. But he didn't think it was any big deal because they were gonna jump it. It's gonna be toasted anyways. Got an invoice for the mirror.

[B]

Really?

[A]

Yeah. Well, he's doing some shit he shouldn't have been doing.

[B]

I think there's probably the misconception that, like, we don't care about anything or that TP doesn't care about anything. Because you watch one video and five things get broken.

[A]

There's a difference from, like a Tuesday night when everyone's sleeping, and then there's some people here that are just around

[B]

and just wrecking all of our. Wrecking all bikes and all of our. And then the day that we put them back in the place, they're all broken.

[A]

How are all these broken? Wait, this one looks like it was crashed really hard.

[D]

Pit bikes?

[B]

No, I mean, it's just like. That was just the example.

[A]

All right.

[G]

Yeah, fair example.

[A]

There is some toasted out to pit bikes. We got, like, two that are down right now that work.

[B]

We have, like, eight.

[G]

One pit bikes down with, like, an undiagnosed mystery electrical issue that we've been trying to get since, like, the day we got it. From the dealer.

[F]

How about the other six?

[G]

The other three are fine. We only have four. Three are good ones. A mystery.

[C]

And one is mine, so it probably doesn't run.

[G]

Yeah, Mike would be the fifth one that's toasted. Mine burns a quarter oil per hour, but that's my ordeal.

[A]

But you know what I said to that, that, to that guy when he told me that he got an invoice for it? I go, that's a good idea. And then I walked away and he was like, oh, I might have just started something.

[C]

I mean, honestly, I think that is a good idea. And also like, yeah, you know, it might seem like we care less than we do. It maybe is a little bit sociopathic of us that if it's on video, it doesn't matter. But like, that's our bread and butter. Like if it's on video and we're able to make content if there was

[A]

a reason behind it. But you can't just come in here and just start breaking. Like you break a pool stuff cue because you were mad when you lost or whatever. And then it's like, well, that was pointless and now we got to buy

[F]

a new one or pile up a pit bike. When you're just out, there's difference from

[A]

making like an entertaining right.

[G]

Video vs oh yes, shout out to Uncle Rich for twisting the hell out of one of our altuses and disappearing back to Texas.

[D]

Wherever he goes, I can't get mad at him. I crashed his brand new one. I got him back. I got him back. I just got him back.

[B]

For you guys, it's like one thing, I guess, when shit gets broken by like the crew. But it seems like more times than not, it's like the outside people that come in and have this, this idea that like we don't give a if anything gets broken. And then they're the ones that break it. They're not a part of our immediate crew. And then that's the people that you never hear from or you never see again. And now you just got a broken $15,000 stark.

[F]

Happens.

[A]

Or a broken hot tub or a broken sauna.

[G]

Did you get paid for that Stark?

[B]

Mike

[G]

got paid for the Stark.

[B]

Did you see? And I don't even know, I don't know who broke that.

[A]

Yeah, what happened? Some guy hopped on your Stark.

[C]

I wasn't even there, bro.

[G]

I'll take the blame for that one. He said he was a professional hill climber and he had never wrote a Stark. And me and Cody were like, you can ride a Stark, but ride Mics and he just lawn darted it, essentially. But he felt really bad and like, yeah, he felt. And like, immediately, as soon as he did it, I'm like, that's Mike's bike. You need to call him and buff it out. So he, like, within minutes, like, he's bleeding.

[C]

Yeah.

[G]

He's on the phone with Mike because

[C]

he was so flustered.

[D]

I was like, what's going on here?

[B]

Yeah, I feel like in that same interaction with like the other people that were doing that, somebody crashed my 250 and it got all bent up.

[G]

Well, Dalton wadded.

[B]

No, I think it was before that or maybe it was even after that.

[G]

From what I know, in riding the moto track with homies, Dalton is the only one that is severely wadded your 250.

[B]

Maybe that's what it was.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

And then. Yeah, maybe that's who it was. And then. And then he was like, I didn't mess anything up, though. And then the next time I went to ride it, it was just all mangled.

[A]

Handlebars are like this.

[G]

Yeah, he wanted it hard, but, like, I helped him piece it back together. We got new levers ordered and.

[C]

Yeah, I didn't know.

[G]

As far as I know, there's never been a random that is just like in the mic situation with the stark. There's never been a random that has ever touched your Honda.

[A]

The bars could have been bent from that situation.

[B]

We looked at it, we assessed it.

[A]

There was a clutch lever, you know, obviously that was broken.

[B]

I tried to bend it back, cut my arm open.

[A]

That was the only.

[C]

That's right from the deal.

[A]

But the bars look fine.

[H]

It could have been bent by someone else.

[A]

I'll still. I'll get you new bars.

[F]

I.

[A]

No, no.

[B]

And like I said, I don't. You know, it's one thing if it's like our crew, like, you know, you're my boy. I really don't care. I don't care one bit. But it's like the outside people that I don't even know hopping on and just piling up. That's like anyone from the outside world

[C]

has hopped on your.

[A]

On your rig. That thing. We keep that thing high, highly tuned.

[B]

Well, that's not. That isn't the case. I can't remember who it was. Somebody. Somebody.

[F]

A couple years ago, somebody crashed your bike.

[B]

Which is the story that I'm. I can't recall exactly who the details

[F]

was, but somebody came out and it wasn't a giveaway winner, was it?

[E]

Wasn't.

[A]

It was the kid with that Jet car.

[F]

Yeah, it was the jet cars.

[B]

The jet jet car friends.

[F]

That's right.

[A]

They had the jet car.

[F]

They wanted to ride bikes and they

[A]

like said he rides dirt bikes all the time. And then he hopped on the dirt bike and it was pretty much just a blatant lie because he didn't know what he was doing and he just crashed.

[G]

That is ringing a slight bell.

[A]

Yeah, that's what it was.

[B]

Yeah, this sounds about right.

[H]

Oh, gosh.

[C]

Yeah. And then I always remember, you know, Kitzman, who was filming for Andrew Carlson when we were over there, and that was when you had a 450, the one we turned into the three wheeler. And he got on it and just looped it. I mean, he damn near did a backflip on dry pavement and he broke his tailbone. He broke his tailbone from it. And remember that?

[F]

I forgot.

[B]

I completely forgot about that one. Ye.

[C]

Your bike ended up, for the most part being, okay, maybe a broken lever, but dude, he literally broke his coccyx.

[B]

Yeah. And that there'd be one thing if I was like, yo, take him for a. I don't care about that one bit either. But damn, I forgot about him hopping on and breaking his tailbone.

[A]

Broken tailbone's bad, cuz then you can't even sit. Yeah, like you sit on it. You. What do you do?

[F]

Eat a little donut.

[A]

Oh, that'd be bad.

[E]

Did Simon loop your bike too?

[F]

Yeah,

[G]

yeah, Simon looped my bike and it was like my most viable viral video of 2024. Yeah, he had the shorts had to be surgically removed from his ass.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

But that's a great example of like, we weren't filming a video, but you still got a great video of it. And.

[G]

Well, and it was my personal bike.

[D]

That too.

[C]

I mean, totally kosher, but like, just amazing that you got such a good video of it because that was funny.

[B]

That was the most classic two stroke power band wheelie to your ass.

[F]

I can probably pull that up. I want to laugh. I love that.

[D]

But that's just the thing though. When you're riding dirt bikes and stuff and you're tipping them over, they just break. Like they're just flimsy.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

It's like.

[C]

Because it's interesting. And I would argue almost like that bikes are very resilient.

[D]

It goes both ways. I feel like if you crash a dirt bike little, you bend the bars.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And then you break the exhaust.

[D]

And then when you wad up hard,

[C]

it's like, they're fine bike. Okay.

[D]

You're like What? What?

[G]

His face when he gets up, he

[C]

looks like you jumping a Chevy.

[B]

That's your same face when you're jumping a Chevy. Oh, bro.

[F]

Bro.

[B]

Some guys are just not supposed to be riding two strokes, though.

[C]

Look at that.

[B]

CJ's one of them.

[A]

I would have done the same thing.

[B]

CJ is one of them also.

[C]

I was laughing at that comment, Evan. That was like. Well, I. Today I found. After watching the TRX wheelie video, I found out that Evan's truck wheelie face and truck jumping face are different. But yeah, Evan has a very distinct truck jumping face, and it's the same as Simon's after he crashed.

[G]

I think it's what you don't want to do in the vehicle, though. Don't they say you're supposed to stay like. Yeah, loose in the vehicle.

[D]

That's on an accident. That's on an accident.

[C]

You're so incredibly dense that I believe in your ten tenseness, bro.

[B]

Don't change anything you're doing. You are a cinder block behind the wheel.

[G]

Other than my back, I can pretty much handle anything.

[B]

Why?

[D]

What's wrong with your back?

[B]

Blown out.

[G]

Blown out for 20 years.

[C]

Speaking of that, actually guy was freaking 10.

[F]

I've. I've been loving this dude. We've been getting clipped on tick tock. And I'm. I'm waiting for someone to clip Ben saying the Johnny Sins thing about Cletus's car.

[B]

Well, now they're just gonna do it. Now they're.

[D]

Now good.

[F]

They should good. But this was so funny.

[C]

My head hurts a little, but my hurts a lot.

[B]

That is concerning. Oh, no.

[F]

Like, I just watch it. I always love watching these because it's. It's always just not a roller, but just a little stance up of the bike.

[C]

Yeah.

[F]

And then it's just something.

[A]

That shot of you guys looks like it's a TV show.

[C]

It does.

[A]

Like you saying that looks like it was clipped from a movie.

[B]

Yeah, it does.

[A]

Like the way your hat's cocked and what you're wearing.

[D]

It just seems so lighting nights.

[C]

I was having such a good time that day. Cuz like, I mean there.

[B]

Yeah, there's probably why your hurt.

[C]

Yeah.

[G]

I just sent Ryan a text. I don't know, we might have to cut it. But Dalton literally just sent me this snap.

[F]

Oh, my gosh. I'm not going to show it on the cam. But it's just a shart and Dalton's underpants.

[D]

Oh, man.

[B]

What is going on with you?

[G]

He's absolutely in there.

[F]

What?

[A]

He just wants to Be like Hodge beers.

[D]

You guys drinking?

[B]

He wants to be bad dude.

[A]

I'm going to start my pants so I can try and impress him and

[C]

then like, Evan, like, later on.

[D]

Nice. Good work.

[B]

That's what Evan said. How long do you run it?

[G]

How long do you run it?

[A]

I'm going to try and run it for a week.

[D]

They're seeing long on their shark pants.

[A]

I'm going to go on a date tonight.

[C]

I'm going to. I don't know if it would count if I did in the same day, so I'm going to shart now. Run it till tomorrow. Shard again.

[D]

That's how he ones up Evan. He double shards and runs it.

[F]

You wash your hands?

[A]

You saw the snap.

[D]

Yeah, we saw how proud he is.

[C]

Just trying to father.

[A]

Follow my father's footsteps. Wow.

[C]

It does kind of sound fun, boys.

[D]

You guys got a screw loose?

[C]

Yeah. Running a shard. Seeing how it goes.

[A]

You're gonna do it, Mike?

[D]

Well, yeah.

[C]

I mean, it's been literally years.

[F]

Easier on the podcast. Get up. We don't want to knock anything over and break it.

[G]

Mike.

[A]

Years.

[C]

I don't know. I genuinely don't know when the last time I started was.

[D]

If I think.

[B]

I know this is a crazy concept,

[G]

but, like, it's not. We can laugh about it. Normal people probably don't want to admit it. I think it's a very normal thing.

[B]

Dude, I don't think it's as normal as your schedule that you're running.

[F]

I mean, runners have it happen, but.

[A]

But you're run.

[B]

You're running it, like, every three days. I. I think not that normal. Yeah.

[D]

And it's normal when you take the underwear off and throw them out.

[A]

Yeah. Dude, if

[D]

on the couch and scroll through reels.

[A]

The second I got a chance to change, I'm definitely changing. I'm not gonna just chill in it.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Especially when I'm at my place that I have a shower and all my clothes at, like, my home. I'm not gonna start and just run it.

[D]

Chose to chill in it.

[A]

I'd get it. If you're, like, out of the store and you don't have any choice, like, or you're somewhere where you're not gonna

[G]

be able to do like Forrest Gump says, happen happens.

[A]

You're damn right. And I mean, I'm not too good to admit that. I mean, I. I sharp every now and then, too. You know what happens? I. I definitely am not. It might be like twice a year type of thing, but.

[D]

Oh, now you're Just trying to be cool.

[A]

But listen, I'm not running a program like Evan. Like I'm the moment I have a chance. If not, I'm changing plans and going straight to make sure I properly shower, change clothes.

[G]

That could really interrupt a guy's schedule. What if you have important things to

[A]

do, like sit on the couch at

[D]

your place, a resident with your buddy

[A]

and scroll on your phone?

[G]

I mean that. That's a fair argument, but maybe there's other situations. You're in the middle of filming it, you're just gonna like.

[A]

Well then, yeah, different deal.

[D]

It's a different deal.

[B]

Must have trust issues.

[A]

Ken, what's the deal with you? Like, do you shirt your pants? Because I mean you're. How many times a day?

[D]

We gotta get off this topic.

[E]

I'm always able to make it to the bathroom before I have, but like,

[A]

I. I don't know how.

[B]

You're very familiar with it.

[A]

How many times you think you go to the bathroom a day?

[B]

4.

[E]

3.

[C]

I'd say threes average if I'm on

[E]

a really bad schedule. 4.

[D]

Mike, why are you can. Why are you confirming that threes is. Is average?

[C]

Because overall, that is his average.

[G]

Dude. Ever since Jack started working here and now your office is over at the farm, everyone's complaining that they never get a chance to go to the bathroom.

[A]

You're just sitting in there the whole

[G]

time going down to the. Down to the merch warehouse just so he can. And get. Get some.

[A]

Get some pork chilling in there. I mean, I don't.

[E]

I wouldn't say that he's a little over exaggerated. I mean it's once in the morning, once in the afternoon, and then it's. It's good.

[D]

I do gotta say now that Ev says that I do see you either going in there or coming out. I haven't seen much office time. I've just seen you going in or out.

[F]

We said it.

[B]

That is a goal.

[F]

But we just need to combine the facilities in Ken's office.

[B]

Yeah, we've kind of gotten out of it, but we used to give Ken like toilet it presence all the time. But gotta get back.

[E]

I am very glad we moved on from that.

[A]

Now we just throw donuts at his cyber truck. So what's the deal? You hate donuts again?

[E]

No, I'm just trying to not have so many carbs in my life.

[A]

But what's that have to do with us throwing donuts?

[E]

I just think kind of disrespectful to throw donuts at a rig multiple times. It was Funny when it was one. It was less funny when it was two. The second time, it was not funny. The third time, and it was not funny at all. The fourth time did we do it?

[D]

But you didn't laugh.

[B]

Okay, you didn't laugh the first time either.

[E]

Well, the first time I. I told you aside, and I was like, hey, can you not do this? And then turn around and then you throw all the donuts on my truck. And then you did it again when I pulled up. And then you did it a fourth time on the drive. On the road.

[D]

On the road.

[A]

What if this becomes a thing? Like you're just. Just living your life. You're just driving on the interstate, and then someone just. You see the window go down. Like when they're about a car length in front of you and they just toss a don out, just hits you.

[B]

Right.

[E]

I might have to take a page out of Ryan's book and be a little psycho. I don't know. Just run them down.

[A]

Run them down and then do what? Tell them how disrespectful it is.

[E]

Run them off the road. Tell them their little.

[D]

There we go.

[F]

I've never ran anyone off the road. Lot of animals.

[G]

But, Ken, since you brought up Ryan being psycho, it is kind of like a stereotype you have. Yeah. Yeah. What happened on our Florida trip where you were the polar opposite of psycho, where you were put in many situations. I know we talked about the garage, but just the trip in whole.

[F]

Yeah.

[G]

Like the fuse had been lit so many times. Is it the Florida air?

[B]

No, but Ryan's different on vacation. Well, that's. We've always said it.

[G]

He gets in Florida and nothing, literally nothing can pay his.

[D]

I did see that.

[B]

I saw that happen.

[F]

I mean, just imagine how bad it is in my head 24 7, that these little moments sneak up out, and then it's like, Ryan's a psycho. Like, I'm dealing with this 24 7. It's. It's up there, and I just hold it back. And then one time daily, it slips out. And then it's. Everyone's like, oh, my God, what a lunatic.

[C]

Right?

[A]

Because I don't know.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Ryan has, like, no chance to get mad. Because if he gets mad, I was like, see? Like, someone could literally do him so wrong. And if he gets mad, that they're like.

[C]

Or if someone. If someone new is around us and that happens. They're like, you guys weren't kidding.

[A]

Yeah.

[G]

Moral of my story, Ryan, was just.

[A]

What happened in Florida.

[G]

In Florida. It was more of, like, A compliment than to like, try to.

[F]

No, thank you. It was part of like my just self reflection. I was like, I should try to be more thankful and positive about things and try to realize that in the big picture, everything is going to be okay.

[C]

The crazy and just not let it

[F]

affect me as much, which is difficult.

[D]

The craziest one that I saw was you were doing something with the remote and you had just struggled to get the batteries into the back of it, and then you hung it up on the wall and it fell out of the wall hanger and the batteries exploded everywhere. And you look at me, you turn and look at me and go, just

[B]

start laughing as Fred Spinny's spending's hiding underneath the blanket.

[D]

I was like, why is he laughing? And then I thought you were more psycho because you laughed at it. I was like, why is he laughing at it now?

[B]

I don't know.

[F]

I thought it was pretty funny. Again, the point is, I don't get pissed off when I do something wrong because it was an accident. So someone else. If you'd done it three times, I'm

[E]

like, figure it the out.

[B]

Then. Then you would add a problem.

[F]

Then that remote would have come flying at you. No. I don't know. I'm just trying to be more. More positive and less. Less psycho. Unfortunately. The thing is, if you do something a few too many times, you're just labeled that forever. So no matter how positive I am, I'll always be a psycho. And that, I guess, is just the cross I will have to bear.

[A]

He's a positive psycho.

[C]

Congrats on being somehow the only guy here wearing camo pants. It's literally.

[F]

It was a gamble.

[B]

It was a gamble and it paid off. Let's get a little ootd, huh?

[F]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I got my aloe shoes, Lululemon shoes.

[A]

Out.

[B]

Get up. Give a little.

[D]

Yeah, you like this?

[G]

You want this?

[B]

Get a little sp.

[D]

We got this nice bag.

[F]

We got a good baggage on it.

[D]

Hammer holster, my Corvette shirt.

[A]

You didn't see the news though, huh?

[F]

I didn't see the news. What's the new news?

[A]

Oh, camo pants are like, totally out. I'm just kidding.

[D]

Damn.

[F]

Since Saturday, they became out.

[C]

Also just a random thing when you, you know, you're at an Airbnb, there's lots of gifts, games. Ryan pulls out guess who. But he's like, let's play this, like, funny. And so next thing I know, he's playing against Evan, and he's just like, does your guy look like he would drive his Car into a grocery store window. And then Evan would be like, yeah,

[D]

he kind of does.

[C]

And then Evan would be like, does your guy look like he'd give his wife's boyfriend a ride home from the bar? That was pretty funny.

[F]

It's Guess who. But you can't use any describing characteristics. And the best part is, is. Is Evan got it right twice.

[D]

Wow.

[F]

It's a little game. Little board game. It's good for you. You and you kids in your damn screens. Ever tried playing Guess who? It's boring as

[B]

Elvis. Sales pitch, Ryan. My phone was dead.

[F]

My phone was dead. It was charging across the room.

[A]

If you're a psycho, Ryan, what is all of us like? Like, you know, like, how would you describe everyone, though, now, Chance?

[G]

Label everyone.

[A]

Like, label us. I think that's fair. Like, if we're going label you psycho, like, you should label us off of how we are.

[F]

That's too much pressure right now.

[G]

Don't overthink it.

[C]

Shoot from the hip.

[E]

Five seconds a person go.

[C]

Now just chuck out sarcastic for me because it's.

[F]

Yeah, sarcastic. Easy. Ken's gonna get mad because it is a little bit psycho adjacent. But I'd go spaz, you know, because there's random things.

[A]

I've heard that word in a long time.

[B]

Time. Dude, nothing pisses of spaz off more than being called a spaz.

[A]

You think I'm a spaz? I'm not a spaz.

[B]

How am I a spaz?

[A]

Well, you're spazzing right now.

[D]

I'm not spazzing.

[B]

How am I a spaz?

[E]

I would say that is somewhat accurate.

[F]

There we go.

[C]

All right.

[E]

There are certain things that just push me over the edge. And some certain people know exactly which buttons to push to get make that happen.

[F]

That makes sense. Evan is a yapper. That boy can talk to anything and anyone about anything.

[E]

Or nothing.

[F]

Or nothing. Spenny, you're probably just a chiller.

[C]

What?

[F]

I know. I'm trying here, okay?

[B]

I give him that.

[A]

I'd say that, too. Yeah. He's just too chill.

[D]

I haven't been chill the last couple days.

[B]

Evan's really been riding.

[D]

He got mad at Dalton and Evan yesterday, that's how. Like, that was really the first time I've been like. Like, was I not in a dick move at the golf course?

[G]

Really? Well, I mean, you just said you were going to take your clubs and go home.

[D]

Well, no, I don't.

[F]

Okay.

[D]

Dalton was like, yo, can I get ox? I'm like, no, Dalton, you're not getting ox. Like, you always get ox. Like, that's how mad I was. Normally, I don't care.

[F]

That sounds. That's like the equivalent of me literally committing murder.

[G]

But today you were upset because you popped a tube. I didn't pop a tube. And then you popped a second tube. And I said, spenny, please, we only have one tube left. Let me just do this one. No. And then I go, spenny, you're using the wrong spoons. I haven't used these spoons for 20 years. I go, well, maybe if you use the round ones without sharp fucking edges, you won't pop the goddamn tube. And hey, maybe you should use some of this lubricant that you. No, I just use water. Pop the third tube.

[D]

I'm telling you, it was a bad

[G]

day, but I tried to a. Have help.

[D]

Yeah, you did, you did.

[G]

But either way, I. I. Chiller's fair.

[A]

I was actually.

[F]

This isn't a label, but. Cj, I was thinking about you on my drive home last night.

[B]

Nice.

[F]

You've been really funny lately, dude.

[D]

I said the same thing. Yeah, same thing. CJ's been ripping.

[F]

There's. There's certain types of comedians. Some comedians and funny guys in the group are always saying something, and they'll sometimes land, but CJ will sit in silence. And then he's surgical with his comedic timing. You'll just be quiet for a little bit, and then you'll just get the whole table laughing. Girls and guys different. You just. You just play it right. You're just like a sniper with your jokes.

[A]

Thank you.

[B]

Yeah.

[F]

And I was like, really appreciate it. I was like, damn, CJ's been on one. He's been on top of it lately.

[B]

You know who he gets that from? His mom.

[A]

Really?

[B]

Yeah.

[F]

Kim.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

She's always making Mom's funny.

[B]

She's always making jokes out of things.

[A]

Oh, yeah?

[B]

Yep. And I never really put two and two together until I think Greta told me that. I was like, oh.

[F]

Oh.

[A]

So you and Greta were talking about how funny I was too, Ben?

[C]

Yeah. Yeah.

[B]

Wow. It has been brought up.

[A]

Really?

[B]

Yeah. I guess they've been. They've been land. No, I agree.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

People are finally coming around.

[F]

Last night you were talking about it, that he was funny.

[B]

Yeah. In the last couple days.

[G]

See?

[B]

Yeah.

[F]

I'm saying he's locked in right now.

[A]

Remember when we were in Florida?

[D]

I was like, dude, you've been hilarious, lazy. I was like, you've been cracking me

[A]

up, but I feel like I wasn't really trying to be. I was Just, like, doing anything. Like, we were just at the grocery store. I was like, get those for Evan. He'll like those.

[B]

He goes, that's hilarious.

[D]

You were like, no, he.

[A]

Well, like those.

[D]

True comedic genius. You were like, oh, we'll get him. We'll get him, like, the buzz ball and, like, the bag of Cheetos. And you're like, that'll keep him entertained for a little while.

[A]

That will keep him entertained for a while.

[D]

Bonus. It's just so funny, man.

[F]

I'll.

[A]

I'll take that label.

[F]

Ryan, you've been locked in. Been locked in lately.

[B]

Dude, Ken's a spaz.

[C]

I know.

[B]

CJ's funny guy.

[D]

Like, sarcastic spaz.

[G]

I can't shut the up.

[D]

Funny. Next.

[C]

Ben, you're just the best guy I know.

[F]

I am on.

[G]

I'm on the edge. The of my seat for Ben's here.

[F]

Well, okay. I actually was just thinking. I was like, I don't know what I'm gonna say for Ben. Jack is swaggy,

[B]

so McQueen labeled sway.

[F]

You might have to give me a minute on you might have to give me a minute on Ben to really pin him down. Okay, pause.

[A]

We'll give Ryan a minute. Dude, Jack looks like Ben. You guys look alike.

[C]

You guys do. Look.

[A]

I swear, dude, like, we should get Jack the same haircut as Ben. Men. And we could swap you two out interchangeable.

[G]

Did this happen? Did we talk about this in the podcast? Greta came up behind Jack, hugged him,

[A]

and kissed him on the neck. No. Then Jack slapped her ass. And then they realized. They realized they were like, oh, wrong people. Wrong. Wrong spouse.

[B]

There we go. Funny guy.

[F]

And then Ben got a haircut right after it.

[B]

No. But yeah. We were sitting at a table at lunch, and Jack was sitting with his back to the door, and Greta walked. Walked in and went up to Jack and was like, hi. And, like, hugged him, like, around his shoulders.

[A]

Hi.

[B]

And then Jack turned around like this, and his grand girl.

[C]

Oh, that's awkward.

[B]

It was like when Ryan slapped her ass at that mg.

[F]

It was dark. It was dark.

[E]

I forgot.

[F]

I'm sorry.

[A]

He saw that thing, and he was just like. Like, I'm just going to do it.

[D]

I'm just going to say he saw that.

[A]

I'm just going to do it.

[D]

Is crazy to say that he saw that thing.

[A]

Also was like, I'll just do it one time. Say it was an accident.

[B]

But why am I. Why am I picturing. It?

[A]

Everyone believe it. It's an accident.

[F]

I'll just say it was dark in there.

[C]

Why am I picturing Ken giving the same answer. Ken, who doesn't have a significant other currently.

[B]

Why'd you do that?

[C]

Ah, it was dark.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Oops.

[F]

Well, I don't want to just, like, feel like I'm taking the finger you point at me and turn it right back around on you. But actually, I did think I'm gonna. I'm gonna go with Sly, because I saw this on your Instagram today.

[A]

You were making like a fox, a

[F]

lot of fun of me for taking your sister to prom. Look at this whole dedicated Instagram post to CJ's fiance.

[A]

Who wouldn't feel lucky to surf with anchor.

[B]

You know what? You know what happened? CJ saw that, and he said, oh, can't let my little cousin one up me here. And then he swooped her.

[A]

Yeah, I don't think you had a chance.

[G]

You went to prom with Alex?

[B]

No, no, Ryan went. Ryan went to prom with my sister.

[A]

Oh, no. Alex. Alexis, my fiance, is. Is the same age as Ben's older sister, so she was probably over hanging out, and then Ben was just this little stupid kid running around, and it was like, can I go surfing with you? Get a picture and try to look cool on Instagram.

[F]

And he did. He had it up on the gram that day.

[D]

Hard post. Hard.

[B]

Posted her hard, hard launch.

[A]

Nah, it's all good.

[B]

Thanks, bro.

[A]

I'm pissed about Water under the fridge.

[C]

You didn't know about that till right now?

[B]

What the.

[A]

I'm gonna have to rethink this whole engagement thing. Thing.

[D]

Water under the fridge.

[G]

Trailer park.

[B]

Gosh, boys.

[G]

And you're from Canada.

[D]

Oh, yeah, I've seen it. Seen all of them.

[C]

You scared me for a second there.

[F]

There were some funny other old pictures. Oh, here's a picture of. You'll have to beep this, but he's real.

[D]

Whoa.

[B]

Don't be showing up.

[G]

AI is a crazy thing.

[B]

Don't be showing them.

[F]

There was an AI in 2015.

[B]

We're gonna do a hard launch with him and Ed. Ev. Like, a face reveal.

[A]

Like, are they gonna start dating or what? Hard launch.

[B]

We're gonna introduce them.

[E]

Ev is just gonna think it's a paid actor.

[B]

It's a good point, actually. We could really just introduce anyone then.

[G]

I just feel like I've met most people that you guys have stories about, and you have the most stories about this person that I just.

[A]

He was a legend.

[G]

We do.

[B]

We have so many stories about him,

[G]

and you always give me a look while you say it to leave me like, you know, they're messing with me,

[B]

it's crazy, too, because, like, C.J. and I were best friends with him, and he pretty much just, like, stopped coming around, like, the summer before Seaboy started.

[A]

Yeah, he would have been really funny on camera.

[B]

He would have been. People would have loved him.

[A]

He just decided he wanted to move away and do something else.

[G]

If he existed.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

So basically, to give context to the listener, Ben and I and Ryan and Micah and Ken, we have this friend that we hung out with a lot, and we have a lot of old stories with that will sometimes tell. And Evan's never seen this guy's, never met this guy, doesn't have social media anything, so, like, he can't look him up. And he just thinks that we're trolling him. He thinks that we, like, are making up fake stories about a fake person and trolling him.

[G]

And I have been trolled plenty of times. So it's not like this is just, like a really out of the blue thing. Like, it's normal for me to question anything that you guys say.

[A]

The one thing that really threw it for a loop was that Ken tried saying that he was our cousin.

[B]

No, no, no.

[A]

And you guys.

[E]

You guys, as a troll, told me.

[A]

So I think you just didn't know what was going on. You just thought he was our cousin.

[E]

Oh, it was. You guys were like, oh, yeah, he's our cousin.

[A]

I was just like, is that how he said it?

[E]

I was like, okay, cool. And then just years later, I was like, I thought he was your cousin. You're like, absolutely not.

[C]

I just love the love.

[A]

Sometimes that dude's on a different planet.

[C]

You're like, I don't think he's a real person. Then we're like, it. We'll just convince you that he's not a real person. And then next thing you know, Dalton's like, I hear you guys talk about him all the time too. And now Evan's telling me he's not even a real person. What is this? And so you were convincing him that he wasn't a real person.

[A]

Oh, my God. Do you remember? I just thought it was. Funny story. He did one time in high school, his name's Beep, so maybe we can tell it, right? In high school, he banged this girl, right? So she's at his house, and he's like, so she goes home or whatever, and then he's got this condom. He, like, doesn't know what to do with it because he doesn't want to throw it. Like, you don't know he doesn't want Flush it, because you think it's gonna up his, like, septic or plumbing. And then he's also like, I can't throw it in the garbage. Like, what if my parents find it? So he, like, sneaks out, and he was, like, in such a hurry. He's like, so he's only his underwear. And he, like, runs across this golf course and throws it in this garbage or something. And then he went home. He runs all the way back. And then he gets, like, nervous. No, he just threw it outside. He just threw it somewhere. And then he, like, gets all nervous and he's, oh, like, what if they, like, grab the condom and, like, DNA test it and then figure out it was me and get me for littering? So he runs back out, like, a few hours later in the middle of the night, finds this used condom on the golf course and then runs to, like, a hole and throws it in the garbage or something. My God, it was crazy. That was a funny story.

[B]

I don't know if that.

[A]

We can tell that one.

[G]

I don't know.

[B]

I feel like it's probably fine.

[A]

I mean, what if people know who we're about talking, Talking about?

[C]

They won't.

[A]

I hate blowing up people's spot.

[F]

You know, stories like this have been finding us for years.

[E]

Like, how?

[B]

Just how, you know, I think everyone has stories.

[F]

Yeah.

[B]

And every friend group has stories.

[A]

I have my.

[B]

We're just like, a story. Just like a tape recorder that we just record at night and then play live the next day.

[A]

Or like, the pumpkin situation when me and my buddy.

[B]

That one. Actually, I just heard this one last

[A]

week on the podcast.

[G]

Pod.

[A]

I said on the pod.

[F]

Yeah, pod.

[B]

Dude, no, you didn't.

[F]

Yeah, you did.

[A]

Yeah, sorry. Ben and I are actually, like, stupid. What's going on?

[F]

What were you going to say?

[A]

Nothing. I'm on a podcast. I'm not talking.

[F]

I remember when I did that.

[A]

That is crazy. Ryan, on our first podcast ever, you, like, didn't say anything, and now you're like, the. The dude running this Isn't that crazy.

[F]

Glow up. I think I was really scared, and we were just, like, really yapping. I didn't want to, like, interject, and then I realized that's just kind of what you have to do.

[B]

Yeah, dude. Nothing pisses people off more than having to listen to someone talk on a podcast.

[F]

Just the fucking worst.

[A]

Benny's a. Shut up. Sit there and look pretty.

[B]

What does he think this is, a podcast?

[F]

The second one, I talked a little bit, and then more and more, and then now we're here. We've done like 200. And what is this, 217 episodes?

[B]

How many years have we been doing this show?

[A]

20, 21, I think. Five years. Yeah. It is actually crazy because it seems like the podcast is still new to me. But, yeah, we've been doing it for a minute. I was thinking about that just today, though. I was listening to this Hulk Hogan doc. So then I saw that his daughter went on this podcast and she was talking crap about. She didn't like it. But I was watching this podcast and I was thinking to myself, like, man, these people are running it so much more different than we do. I think a lot of podcasts have to, because, like, they got guests on. They're like, so professional and, like, kind of stiff with it, and they got like all these points they're talking about. And I was like, man, we're so lucky. We get to just sit down and like, riff, Just riff, and just like, we're just hanging out, you know, like, sometimes. Sometimes they're really, really good, and other times they're maybe just good.

[D]

But, dude, sometimes I feel bad. I'm like, I. I want to come on and make sure I have good things to say. Hey, you can't just come on here and just say random. You gotta actually.

[A]

You really can't.

[D]

Like, you gotta. It is kind of hard.

[A]

You can, but you can't.

[D]

Yeah, yeah, you can, but you can't. But, yeah, you just can't fly stuff

[B]

out of left field.

[D]

Otherwise it's. It's not really gonna work.

[B]

Yeah, you can if there's like a reason for it or. Or more that you can add.

[D]

Yeah, true.

[C]

Yeah. Yeah.

[B]

There's plenty of stuff too. I'm sure that just gets cut out of the podcast that just. And we'll. We'll try. Won't go anywhere. Okay, next topic.

[A]

It's like, you say something and then it gives, like, a new thing for people to, like, transition off of and like. Yeah. Create a new conversation.

[B]

Do you think because of the podcast, people feel like they know us much better?

[A]

Yeah, for sure.

[C]

I think that'd be factual.

[F]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

I mean, we're talk, like, I think you talk about more like behind the scenes life stuff, what's going on at

[F]

home, a lot more personal.

[A]

I was sitting next to a kid yesterday. I did a conceal and carry class with Alex. Alex. And the kid that I'm sitting next to, I don't know, he's probably 18, 19, and he's just like, you know, just the standard Seaboise Fan. He's been watching since he was 10 or whatever. 12, you know, so he's like, dude, like, this is so weird. Like, I feel like I know you, but you don't know me. And like, you know, just kind of. People say that all the time. I'm like, oh yeah, he's. Yeah, people feel like they know us, like they know our whole life. And he was like, is it weird that like, like I know so much about like he was like, cuz we're sitting there for like three, four hours and he was a cool, cool kid, nice guy. But yeah, it is strange. I guess my answer to him was like, ah, it's just kind of normal. I guess I don't really think about it.

[B]

Yeah, the reason I guess I say that, like, obviously people know more about us because we share so much more on the podcast about like our personal lives. But the podcast audience is a lot older. Like young kids don't listen to the podcast. And, and I often find that like young kids know more about me than I do. They remember everything and they know like, what we've done every single week for the last eight years because they, they watch the videos religiously, like on repeat, where I completely forget about it one week later. And so I, I like just meet so many like younger fans that know so much about me and I have a hard time believing that they also listen to, to the podcast. Like it's, I don't know, it's oftentimes like an older demo for the pod.

[F]

I love when people tell me that they watch the pod.

[C]

Yeah, I mean, my favorite thing to hear, dude. I feel like they, it would help like if you were like hoping to meet someone and you were like, let's say you didn't want to embarrass yourself at said meet and greet. And if they had a podcast, you'd be able to tell what their mannerisms, how they respond, how I respond when you guys say something to me and vice versa. And so, I mean, yeah, definitely, definitely. Like not just your stories help us get to know, but like literally like learning the way we respond, what makes us laugh. Everything.

[F]

A lot of fun.

[C]

I can't believe we've done over 200 podcasts. Like when you're bringing up the first podcast, I remember it like it was yesterday. I remember you like, not talking much myself, kind of the same and like having our L table and, and, and all the thoughts. We had so many thoughts coming into it, you know. All right, boys, it's got to be good. We gotta, you know, keep it moving. And we were overthinking a lot of it, but maybe that was for the best because now we're locked in on it.

[F]

Mike is getting another bowl cut at a million. Ideally, if we could hit that like right before Ben's wedding. So he looks ridiculous for Ben's wedding.

[B]

Oh, that'd be amazing.

[F]

August.

[C]

We'd have to crank on that.

[F]

People at home will have to crank on that. Yeah, definitely giving you a little homework. Yeah, Got a crank on it.

[G]

But talking about all this cranking spend. He's getting excited.

[D]

And what are they cranking on?

[B]

Right?

[F]

Ryan Hogs.

[B]

No, I think the subscribe button. The subscribe button.

[D]

Subscribe button.

[F]

And your hug. Go home. Rev up your motorcycle. Rev for spenny.

[A]

Can we talk about that one thing you sent me? The idea, like, would it be exposing the idea if we talked about it? The one where they're like holding the hands? Oh, in theory. You're gonna kind of realistically.

[B]

Are we ever gonna do it?

[F]

Yeah, I'll just live on edge until it happens.

[B]

Yeah, we can talk about it.

[A]

I don't think care, you know? Eh, I don't know.

[D]

Oh, now you can't do that.

[B]

You can't do that.

[A]

I don't know. Oh, man. You know, have you ever. Okay, fine. Well, I'll. I'll pull it up. So Jack was telling us about this kid who goes on 50 dates in 50 states. Right. And then Ben was on Tik Tok and sent me this idea, obviously with our one single friend, Keno. And basically the idea is that. That I'm going to pull up on screen here.

[F]

Perfect.

[G]

My name is Evan.

[B]

Do this from Cambridge.

[G]

How I'm feeling very nervous, excited. I also just turned 42 yesterday.

[D]

My name is Misty.

[A]

So these people don't know each other and they're going to have to, like, do a photo shoot together. And then they see if they fall in love after and they don't get to see each other before. Gosh, we want to do this with Ken.

[C]

So awkward.

[B]

So awkward.

[C]

I love.

[A]

Can you imagine how perfect this would go?

[C]

I love it.

[E]

It would go so badly.

[A]

No, Ken, you would be a superstar. This is made for you.

[B]

I'm Evan.

[A]

Funny. His name's Evan and he's from Cambridge. That's where Evan's from.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Not where I'm from from. I thought you're from Cambridge, Minnesota.

[B]

No, clo K. Okay, sorry.

[F]

So it's like a first date.

[A]

Yep.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Except it's a photo shoot and they're acting like they're in love and then they see if they're falling, if they're in love after.

[F]

They do look happy together. They do.

[A]

They're just like cosplaying being married or kidding.

[D]

Oh, they gotta get close.

[A]

What the.

[D]

They're just hugging. That's such an awkward hug.

[A]

Yeah, it's very awkward.

[E]

It's almost like they've never met before before.

[A]

But it would be hilarious.

[D]

It looks like they've never hugged before either, so.

[A]

I don't know.

[C]

I mean, interesting. A lot more awkward. The transitions are really throwing me off.

[A]

But I like the dating stuff. I always think it's fun when we have, you know, our single friends and we try to find them love. You know, if you just look at the history of TV shows, there's a lot of dating shows, you know, from the Bachelor, Love Island, Flavor Flav, his show, like the Kid Rock had one or whatever his name was, was Brett Michaels. Brett Michaels, Yeah.

[B]

I think it would be great. How do you feel about it?

[E]

Awful. I, I, I feel awful about it because I know there's going to be some other kind of twist that gets thrown into it.

[F]

Always is.

[B]

I don't know if there's twist. There needs to be a twist.

[A]

I think we're just trying to see what comes from it.

[C]

Yeah, I'm, I think we should do it with Ken. There's so many crazy data.

[A]

Who else are we going to do it with? Mike?

[C]

I think we got no other single people.

[G]

I guess we run it like parental control. Do you remember that?

[A]

That would be good too. We could remake a bunch of shows like that.

[D]

What was that?

[A]

That would be funny. This is way beyond your time.

[G]

Parents watch the date and at any time they just hit the buzzer and then like, get rid of the girl or the guy, whatever, Whatever side the parents.

[A]

Well, I don't think it's at any time. No, it's, they come, they come into

[C]

it disapproving of their current significant other and they have, they curate a bunch of other days and they do three

[A]

dates and then at the end, it's up to the kid to decide side who they like. They take it up with the parents, but, and the kid decides and then like, they either sometimes stay with their current boyfriend or girlfriend and then their parents like, oh, and it's just so awkward because it's like, imagine you're just like a high school kid or just out of high school and you're dating some girl and the parents are just like, oh, you're dating him, right? In front of you. I'd be like, all right, well, this isn't gonna work.

[F]

Then they throw you on a tv.

[A]

Yeah, but it was, like, it was pretty fake, but, dude.

[C]

But there's one now where, like, so they take. I think it was four or five couples that have been dating anywhere from a year to five years, and then they go to two different villas. All the guys.

[F]

Temptation Island.

[C]

Yeah. All the guys go to one villa.

[E]

I haven't.

[B]

I haven't watched it, so plugged in, dude.

[C]

It's insane. It's insane. And it's the. That villa is full of girls, single girls that are just like, hi.

[A]

Like, with the guys.

[C]

Yes.

[A]

Holy. This is a wild show.

[C]

Other villa, the five girls that are in current relationships are at a villa full of, you know, eight guys.

[D]

Single guys.

[A]

Holy crap. That would be nerve wracking.

[C]

It's to test their relationships. But then obviously, like, some of them stay kind of strong. Some of them just fully cheat.

[D]

It's just a cheating show. Yeah.

[A]

And they actually cheat in a show zone. Tv, they hook up.

[B]

So, yes, the guy.

[A]

Holy crap.

[C]

That's why the guy and the girl that were dating for five years, the guy cheated right away.

[B]

First showed.

[C]

Then they sit down at the fire, the girls do, and they watch the footage of what their boyfriends did. Some of them didn't do anything bad bad. Some of them, they literally watch them cheating. And then vice versa. The guys do that.

[F]

They stay in the building. There's the girl, like, I'm going wild.

[C]

And then basically, like, the girl watched that happen. She's like, well, like, f this, we're done. And then they go into, like, they can go into a secret area, and the red light will go off at the other villa if anyone's in there. And then the guy's just like, I know that's her. I'm like, well. And they're all like, dude, her. That's so lame. And, like, he's literally the one who just cheated on her.

[A]

Yeah, dude, she's being lame.

[B]

The producers are just loving that.

[A]

So they're married.

[F]

No.

[C]

No.

[A]

Oh, okay. I was like, that's crazy. Just.

[C]

But yeah, like, couples.

[D]

But yeah.

[C]

I mean, you had the one that they were dating for five years from 18 to 23, and then they go on the show. Nobody ends up together still.

[B]

Oh, really? Everyone just breaks up.

[C]

There was one couple that I saw that. That ended the show together, but, like, wow.

[A]

You got to wonder how many are real couples, though. You know, it's like, you maybe got like, some Girl who's like, like your friend or you know, you just kind of hanging out and you're just like, yeah, we could do this. And you know, crazy concept.

[C]

Crazy concept.

[A]

It's a good concept, but yeah, crazy for sure.

[F]

Ken Island.

[C]

I like the sound.

[A]

Ken's Love Island.

[B]

They have to fight for his love against each other.

[D]

He's the Bachelor.

[E]

Sounds like just the normal bachelor would be.

[D]

It sounds like Bachelor, but he's way better.

[B]

Oh, there. Ken is like.

[C]

I could see it though, like. Cuz the Bachelor's kind of like lame. Like they don't do that much fun stuff.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

A guy like Ken to spice it up.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Would you do the Bachelor, Ken?

[E]

No.

[D]

Really?

[F]

Why not?

[A]

It only takes like 21 days or something. Like 30 days.

[E]

I don't know.

[F]

We would miss you.

[A]

I would miss you. But I. I'd let you do it.

[E]

I don't know. I. I think those shows are kind of lame. I don't. I just think they're chick shows. I'm not. I can't watch the Bachelor.

[B]

But.

[A]

But would you be on it to date some of these?

[E]

I don't think I'd ever seen do it. I couldn't.

[C]

I love that I'm not going to be on a show for girls.

[E]

No, it's just I. I think they're kind of.

[F]

Kind of lame.

[G]

Cheeto.

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

Cheeto. Yeah. Cheeto would be the good word.

[A]

So if they reached out, you would say no?

[E]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

If our agent lined it up and they offered you.

[E]

I would say no.

[A]

They offered you 100 grand to be on the show and you have to be on the show. It takes 30 days to film.

[E]

I think I would still say no. I think it's pretty.

[F]

There would be a bunch of chicks that would like you.

[A]

You would be more famous. A way different level of fame.

[B]

Same.

[A]

Ken would be getting exposed left and right. TMZ talking about him doing something.

[F]

Man.

[B]

What if they were all 48 year old women?

[F]

Age of attraction.

[E]

I still think it's. I, I just couldn't be on one of those shows. I, I just don't like the concept. I don't know, it's just not for me.

[D]

I think dating shows are whack.

[A]

No, I'm not saying they're.

[D]

I think so.

[A]

I'm not saying they're like the most legit thing but. Well, we could probably call it entertainment.

[B]

It's almost like off of it then. I think she's been pushing for it.

[E]

It's almost like every single one of those shows they all end up breaking up or whatever. Like once the non disclosure period ends, it's like every single one of them.

[B]

Well, can I think. I think it's more so for the clout and money.

[C]

Maybe we can see if we could extend the NDA in turn extending the relationship.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

What's the.

[A]

What's the rate of people on the Bachelor or the Bachelorette that actually stay together?

[F]

Yep, I'm looking it up right now. Chad's figuring it out.

[A]

It doesn't prove if it's right or. You know, I think people do the

[F]

Bachelor at and the Bachelor for love.

[E]

They do it for the clout. They don't do it for every single one of them. Does it for the clout because then like one of the people that doesn't get selected but makes it pretty far in, they're the next like Bachelor. Bachelorette.

[F]

There's 10 Bachelor and Bachelorette couples together.

[A]

And how many seasons?

[E]

40 seasons.

[D]

It's pretty low odds.

[A]

Yeah, definitely not the best.

[F]

Okay, it's an 18 success rate on the Bachelor. The Bachelorette is a 19% percent success rate. And the Golden Bachelorette is only a 20.

[A]

What, what percent of marriages stay together though?

[E]

50.

[D]

I think less than 50.

[A]

So that means it's like not that far off nowadays.

[D]

It's less than 50.

[F]

30 swing less people are getting divorced because people aren't getting married as early. They marry people that actually love, not out of circumstance.

[C]

I can see that.

[D]

I thought divorce levels were higher.

[F]

First marriages about 30 to 45. And in divorce, 60% plus of second marriages end in divorce and. And third is 70 plus.

[A]

That's when you know it's just you. It's your fault. Wow. So that's interesting.

[F]

Technically a. A standard marriage is more has a higher success rate than the Bachelor, but throw something at the wall, see if it sticks.

[A]

Cuz your second one will be even less likely of working.

[B]

Well cj, don't talk him out of it.

[A]

Oh, sorry. No, I, I was, thought. I thought he was just talking about marriage.

[B]

No, he's talking to.

[A]

Well, your second one gonna be even less likely and your third, I don't know, clout.

[E]

That's all they are.

[F]

Well, but you could change the tune and go for love.

[E]

We do actually got to start wrapping

[B]

up a Bachelor that's actually here for love. That could be your. That could be your whole slogan.

[A]

Ken, he's not even here for the tv. He hates the show.

[F]

He doesn't want to be on tv.

[C]

I already have plenty of it.

[B]

Someone who doesn't want the clout. Just love.

[C]

And you said we gotta, we do gotta wrap up.

[E]

Otherwise we're gonna start losing camera.

[A]

Cameras. Where are they gonna go?

[E]

They're just not gonna record anymore.

[F]

Fair enough.

[B]

Our cameras are starting a union.

[C]

Well, it's been real, boys. Thanks for. Thanks for joining us and laughing with us. That was a lot of fun. We got the Octane fest coming up. Last weekend of the giveaway is this weekend.

[A]

It's done.

[B]

Damn.

[C]

All right, well, thanks for everyone who got entered and we'll see you next week. Subscribe if you haven't, throw us a comment and we'll talk to you then.

[G]

Peace.

[B]

Thank you for that. Send off Michael.

[F]

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