Ryan's Reaction to Best Friend Proposing to Sister Prank

Summary

Life Wide Open with CboysTV

Episode: Ryan's Reaction to Best Friend Proposing to Sister Prank

Date: August 15, 2023

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Overview

In this episode, the CboysTV crew—CJ, Ben, Ryan, Ken, Evan, and Micah—sit down for their weekly banter, diving into everything from Alaska RV trips and questionable money habits to fast food inflation and facial hair insecurity. The core highlight is a deep-dive into the recent prank where Ryan’s reaction to his best friend's fake proposal to his sister is unpacked, revealing the group's philosophy on pranking, friendship, and navigating tricky social situations.

The group keeps things real and humorous, blending life advice with behind-the-scenes stories and sharp commentary on current events in their signature chill, authentic tone.

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Key Discussions & Insights

Opening Banter: Sleep Schedules & Novelty Spending

00:00–05:43

• The episode opens with jokes about Mike's sleep schedule and Evan’s questionable financial choices, like odd phone cases from China and novelty items.
• The team teases Evan for his money management, suggesting he needs a financial advisor but agreeing that sometimes it's just more fun to spend impulsively.
  • "You'd have to have like a full lifestyle change. I think I'm not ready for it." — Evan (03:09)
• Discussion of Ken’s resistance to doctors and his “if you can move, you're fine” health philosophy.

Alaska RV Trip: Parental Adventures & Boring Journeys

05:44–10:32

• Ken recaps a recent RV trip to Alaska with his parents, describing the RV’s poor construction and the monotonous activities favored by retirees (“drove around in the car, walked around”).
• Chartering a private plane was actually cheaper and more convenient than renting a car in Alaska, leading to jokes about potentially becoming a pilot.
  • "I was like, driving. I'll just charter a plane." — Ken (08:08)
• Observations about Alaska: “It’s kind of like the more inconvenient Montana.” — Ken (09:53)

Notable Quote

• Ken on traveling with parents:
  “Not in a long time. And I don't need to do it again.” (09:30)

Social Dynamics: TSA Precheck & Relationship Consulting

04:33–11:19

• Tangents on flying with TSA Precheck, treating your partner like royalty, and the inconvenience of zigzag lines at airports.
• Joke about Ken's reputation for accidentally getting involved with couples and “consulting”—leading to business card jokes (“I marry couples”).
• The group reflects on balancing group dynamics and traveling together, with lots of friendly ribbing.

Home Life & Friendship Dynamics

11:20–18:19

• Post-trip, the crew discusses how quiet things felt with everyone scattered.
• Evan’s “big wheel” bike isn’t as practical as a dirt bike for trail riding, but it’s fun as a novelty—launching a chat about novelty vehicles.
• The group jokes about learning to wheelie on three-wheelers and their growing status as "novelties" in motorsport culture.

Auction Fails & Social Media Memories

14:37–19:44

• Story of an accidental $112,000 bid on a junk Toyota 4Runner at auction, with jokes about eBay impulse buys.
• Reminiscing about the early days of Facebook, parental panic about online safety, and how social media now serves practical roles like remembering birthdays.
  • "If there wasn't a birthday cake next to your name on Snapchat, there's no way I'd remember." — Micah (18:09)

Hiring History & The Cboys Origin Story

19:45–26:31

• Evan shares the story of how he got hired—offered a job by the group over mimosas in San Diego, desperate to escape a job removing asbestos.
• The group reveals Evan’s RV trip was effectively his “test run” before officially joining, emphasizing the importance of being able to spend time together harmoniously.
  • "If we can spend that many days, two weeks locked in a 20-some foot metal box together and still want to hang out, you know, I think it's probably worth it." — CJ (24:43)
• Jokes about the “egg salad” incident and learning to bond as a crew.

The Art of Chilling & Life Schedules

26:32–32:17

• The crew discusses the merits of “chilling”—being able to relax, hang out, and enjoy life (like hitting golf balls at 3am).
• Contradictory views on late-night productivity vs. waking up early:
  • “Those four hours before noon are like gold.” — Ben (29:12)
  • “Midnight to 4:00am—that’s when I think the majority of the stories, the funny videos, all the good stuff happens then.” — Evan (30:42)
• Mike admits late nights take a toll, but he just isn’t wired for mornings, leading to a lively debate.

Current Events & Media Moves

32:18–37:34

• The crew riffs on the (now cancelled) Elon Musk vs. Mark Zuckerberg fight, speculating about who would actually win and the cultural impact.
• Analysis of Dave Portnoy buying Barstool Sports back for $1 after selling to Penn for $500 million, highlighting business strategy, branding, and the shift from sports coverage to clickbait podcasts and meme content.
  • "Dave got Barstool back for $1. Wow." — Evan (35:56)
  • "He said he's never gonna sell until the day he dies." — CJ (37:35)

Customer Service Nightmares & Fast Food Inflation

39:00–42:20

• Recounting food order disasters at local bars and restaurants, the crew laughs about Ryan’s consistent bad luck with group meals.
• Quick transition to the harsh realities of fast food inflation, with a $32 McDonald’s order.
  • "I actually could go to the bar and grill and get a burger, fries, and a drink for about $35." — Micah (41:47)
• Reflection on how cultural priorities ("we need Hulu and McDonald's") help normalize rising costs.

Awkward Social Moments: Proposals, Pranks & Politeness

46:58–54:10

The Prank: Parasailor Marriage Proposal

• The central story: CboysTV pranked Ryan with a parasailor flying a "Sydney, will you marry me?" sign to punk both him and Micah, just to see the reactions.
  • "At first glance, I thought she wasn't in on it either. So I, like, turned to her and I'm like, 'I'm sorry, this isn't real. I did not set this up.'" — Micah (47:30)
• Micah quickly realized he was being pranked due to the scale of the stunt.
• Ryan was in genuine shock, leading to a satisfyingly awkward silence on the boat.
  • "As soon as I realized what it said, I was just like, this isn't real." — Micah (47:45)
• The crew jokes about the possible chaos if Micah had actually been planning to propose that week, or if someone had accidentally spoiled a real engagement.
  • "What if he was planning on proposing next week?" — Evan (50:07)

Navigating Social Snafus

• The team swaps stories about accidentally saying the wrong thing (e.g., congratulating someone for an engagement before it happened, mixing up significant others, greeting people as strangers when they’ve met before).
• Discussion of tactics for avoiding social slips: “You gotta say, good to see you.” — Ryan (56:54)

Beards, Double Chins & Self-Image

59:32–65:00

• The crew jokes about the pros and cons of shaving vs. beards, how facial hair hides double chins, and their reluctance to go clean-shaven for fear of looking too young, old, or just odd.
  • "It's like makeup for your face." — CJ (59:57)
  • “I feel like your facial hair style is like a 40-year-old, 45-year-old.” — CJ to Evan (62:20)

Racing, Risk-Taking & Future Plans

65:19–71:52

• Evan reflects on missing competitive racing, noting how it kept him motivated.
• Cletus McFarland invites the crew to take part in a Bristol speedway race, with Evan set to compete against professional drivers for the first time.
• The group teases Evan about his "fearless" driving style and agrees that taking risks is what sets great drivers apart.
  • “You're not afraid to go head on into the wall." — Ben (69:35)
• Jokes about possible carnage, drinking Tonys, and whether Evan will get into a fistfight NASCAR-style if spun out.

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Notable Quotes & Moments (with Timestamps)

• Evan on money habits: "I probably should get a financial advisor, but it's kind of like going to the doctor...I don't want to go in and hear bad news." (02:53)
• Ken on being pranked: "No chicks under 50 in that town." (10:28)
• CJ on friendship: "If we can spend that many days...locked in a 20 foot metal box together and still want to hang out, you know, I think it's probably worth it." (24:43)
• Micah on fast food inflation: "$32. Like, that's really expensive...I actually could go to the bar and grill." (41:24)
• Micah on the prank proposal: "I was like, I'm sorry. This isn't real. I did not set this up. I'm so sorry. This isn't real." (47:30)
• Evan on risky driving: "You're not afraid to go head on into the wall." (69:35)
• On awkward greetings: "You gotta say, good to see you." (56:54)
• On facial hair as self-esteem: "It's like makeup for your face, dude." (59:57)

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Memorable Segments (with Timestamps)

• Ken’s Alaska Story & Charter Flight (07:44–10:32)
• Evan’s Hiring Story & The Asbestos Years (19:44–21:57)
• Parasailor Prank Breakdown (46:58–50:56)
• Barstool’s $1 Buyback (35:47–36:34)
• Fast Food Inflation Rant (41:09–42:17)
• Facial Hair Insecurities (59:32–62:00)
• Racing with Cletus Plans (66:09–71:52)

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Tone & Style

• Language: The crew speaks plainly, organically, and with camaraderie—teasing each other while unearthing deeper themes about friendships, money, and risk.
• Humor: Self-deprecating, quick banter, lots of inside jokes, and relatable observations.
• Pacing: Conversational, with stories and jokes feeding off each other’s energy.

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Summary

This episode is a quintessential slice of CboysTV life: behind-the-scenes friendship, pranks, candid mistakes, and reflections on the absurdity of adulthood—always filtered through the laid-back, authentic banter the audience loves. From RV trips to prank proposals and burger inflation, the CboysTV crew carries listeners through a tapestry of relatable and ridiculous moments, capped off with the dynamic energy that keeps fans coming back every week.

Transcript

[A]

Mike, you gotta fix your sleep schedule, man.

[B]

I was, like, driving. I'll just order a plane.

[C]

You guys want to know something that I could be criminally charged with?

[D]

Yeah. And that's when you offered me the job. Yep. On my birthday. I'll never forget that.

[C]

I asked you beforehand. And it won't be so chaotic. I promise.

[E]

Try to not act so surprised and disappointed.

[C]

Who. Live less Or Sorry. Live more. Worry less. See, that's not even, like, a parody shirt. It's just a. You know, an inspiration.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

To people.

[E]

I figured I couldn't be funny on this podcast. I decided I'd be inspiring.

[A]

Now, why do you. Why did you think you couldn't be funny?

[E]

It seems that my humor doesn't always translate. And honestly, most of my shirts weren't even that funny. I just feel like they were.

[C]

Disagree. I disagree. I would say, like, a lot of your funniest shirts, the punchline was covered by.

[E]

The desk is at the bottom. So we need to get couches up in here.

[C]

We'll go with that. Yeah, we have. We have talked about that. The desk will be going at some point. We're. We're busy. Busy. But we'll. We'll move to couches at a certain point. It'll be more of a chill vibe. Yeah. Eventually we got.

[E]

Well, what in the world is that?

[D]

What is my iPhone 14 Pro Max, bro.

[C]

I've never had someone set their phone down and just take me out that hard.

[A]

What?

[D]

The case. It's.

[E]

What is it?

[C]

What the frick is that, dude, it's.

[D]

Like this, but the pants are.

[A]

No way.

[D]

Wow. It has a hinder.

[C]

I love it.

[A]

What is that? Patrick Star.

[D]

Yeah, it's. I don't really. Yeah.

[A]

What's up with his face looking so weird?

[D]

I don't know. I. It's from China.

[E]

Is that supposed to be something on the side of the cheeks, or is that supposed to be.

[C]

I think it's a glisten.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

Reflection.

[A]

A lot of curve.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

Sorry.

[D]

I didn't mean to jam you up.

[C]

I just figured I'd do it. I'd like to think that if there was a spongebob that was made by Made in China for Chinese people, it would look like this.

[A]

Well, not spongebob, but I think that's just, like, the knockoffs. That way they don't get hit with, like, a seasoned assist, you know, put the shirt. Probably don't own the rights to be making Patrick Star phone cases.

[C]

Well, Evan didn't come with a funny shirt, but he sure came with A funny.

[A]

I thought it was a mushroom from over here. I was like, oh, dude, did you.

[E]

Rock that all weekend? What did people say?

[D]

No, honestly, I. It just showed up in the mail, so I. I just broke it out. Like.

[E]

How much did you spend on that case, Evan?

[D]

$4. But it took like two months to get here.

[C]

Oh, wow. Worth it. Worth it, worth it.

[E]

It's like Mike Sirons, dude.

[D]

They have like a frying pan. So it's a real full 10 inch frying pan that your phone just sits in the middle of. Like, who is buying this stuff?

[E]

I feel like that's more of one of those things you throw in your purse or your, like, knapsack. Like, that's not a pocket case if.

[A]

I want to see you rock that case for 30 days.

[E]

You know, Ev, I. There's a lot of good qualities that you have, but I wouldn't say that your money spending is. Is one of your terrible, terrible, terrible.

[D]

Yeah, no, I know. I probably should get a financial advisor, but it's kind of like going to the doctor. Like, I'm a little hurt. I don't want to go in and hear bad news.

[E]

They're only going to tell you things you're not going to like to hear. I'll tell you that much.

[D]

Yeah, I'm not. Not trying to hear it.

[A]

You'd have to have like a full lifestyle change. I think I.

[D]

Not ready for it.

[C]

But I. I think if they were to inform you that you need a lifestyle change, like, you'd be like, oh, you're no longer my financial advisor.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

A different one that tells them to spend money.

[D]

Yeah. Where's the. Where's the advisor that tells me to head to Vegas once a month?

[A]

Once a month? Tabs.

[C]

And Ev is a big advocate. Like, this is more for the doctor when he's like, you know, you're having a. A genuine conversation with Ken about his knee and you're like, ken, why do you keep going back to the doctor? No news is good news if you ask me.

[D]

If you can move, if you can get through your daily life, no matter how bad it hurts, but you can make daily life work. You're fine.

[E]

Can you Without a brace?

[C]

No.

[B]

Short answer. No.

[A]

All right.

[D]

Where's the video of Ken sprinting through the airport?

[B]

It does not exist.

[D]

It does exist.

[E]

Sprinting through the airport.

[C]

He wasn't sprinting. But he was moving. You were moving.

[B]

I need to get to the Sky Club to get my free drinks.

[D]

You were exposed by your brother.

[A]

Yeah. Cody sent us a snap when you were on your way to Alaska, dude.

[C]

And I was. I mean, again, it was. It was incriminating. You were not sprinting, but you were moving faster.

[A]

Faster than smooth, too, people.

[C]

Faster than people without injured knees. Move.

[B]

Getting a free drink.

[D]

Yeah, he's got a reason.

[B]

I just sit in. In front of TSA for a half an hour waiting for him to get through.

[A]

So I was like, suck. Just traveling with a peasant, huh?

[B]

Non.

[A]

Non.

[B]

Pre check, people.

[C]

Dude. I was cracking up about that, too. Ben right now is in. In Big sky with his girlfriend, and they're flying out of Fargo. So there's no line usually, honestly, not a line. He still walks through the TSA pre right to the front and, like, makes her walk the zigzag back and forth, even though they got to the front at, like, the same time.

[E]

It's tough. I can see both sides on this because I am a royalty with TSA PreCheck, and I'm just going to use it. I don't care if you guys don't. And maybe slightly inconvenient that we can't get to the airport five minutes before our flight takes off. But I'm just. I'm just going to use it, and I'm going to not walk the zigzag and not have to take off my.

[C]

But that's fair. When we're in. When. When we're in a group, like, you know. You know that Evan and I have to walk to the Zigzags. Yeah, but if it's just you and.

[D]

The girlfriend, there have been times that the zigzags are quicker.

[A]

I agree. I love that shit. When we go through the zigzags and we look over at them and they got a bigger line in TSA PreCheck.

[D]

It's.

[A]

We end up just getting there at the same time, I'm like, yep, but.

[B]

You still have to take off your shoes and your belt and everything.

[A]

Yeah. That was so much work.

[E]

I don't know my shoes. So, I mean, that is kind of toug. So, Ken, you and your brother went on a little excursion this week to Alaska.

[B]

Parents are taking their RV across the continent.

[A]

Dude, they love that thing. Just RV tripping everywhere.

[B]

I. I honestly feel bad because they got this rv, brand new, last year. Okay. I'm looking in their bathroom, and the thing is falling apart. Like, it's the same, like, you know, all the trim pieces are falling. Like the RV we had, the trim pieces are falling off. Stuff's not.

[A]

Bathroom door is broken.

[B]

Pretty close. I was like, God, it really shows just how shittily built RVs are.

[D]

I mean, to be fair, they get shook to. And driving up to Alaska, those can't be good roads.

[B]

No, they're not. They're trash. They're trash in that state. But it's like, I'm just looking at this camper, and it's just like this thing is twice the price of the one we had. And it's still just a piece of garbage. They're still just falling apart when you drive it.

[E]

Maybe they're just really testing out the suspension on their three weeks alone or six weeks alone.

[B]

Two retirees just traveling the continent with.

[E]

A bunch of other retirees.

[A]

I would have loved to have sent a camera crew with that same view on that Ken. I mean, Ken goes on a trip to Alaska with his family rv.

[C]

How could you describe it in one word? Was it tolerable?

[B]

Boring. Really boring.

[E]

Have you.

[A]

Why? Why was it boring?

[C]

I mean, my family's boring, too.

[A]

Yeah, but why was it boring about.

[B]

The things your parents are interested and think is fun on a trip and then think about the things we do when we're on a trip? Just completely different things.

[A]

Yeah. So, like, what were you guys doing?

[B]

Drove around in the car. Walked around.

[C]

Really?

[B]

That was it.

[D]

That must be hard for a guy.

[B]

With a bad knee, sitting in a.

[D]

Car or the walking.

[E]

I was thinking more of the walking, but, I mean, I guess, yeah, sitting too.

[B]

Everything's flat. It's a tourist flat. We went to Denali. It's a tourist town. They have everything, like, you know, it's ADA certified, so it's.

[E]

So did you rock around on a Jazzy?

[B]

No, no, I took a plane, sat in a jeep.

[D]

Yeah. Tell me about that little airplane. Yeah, I would never.

[E]

Ken told me at lunch today that he chartered an aircraft for him and his brother.

[A]

Are you serious, Ken?

[B]

It was it, like 1,200 bucks to charter a plane, and it was like $11,000 to rent a car. And it take, like four and a half, five hours to drive. Or you can charter a plane and get there in an hour.

[A]

Damn. So that was definitely.

[B]

I was like, driving. I'll just charter a plane.

[A]

I'm surprised you didn't have them just drive you all the way home or fly you all the way home.

[B]

Well, they. They. That'd be a lot fun.

[C]

Yeah. Ken sent a snap that was like. Kind of makes me want to get my pilot's license. If there's anywhere. Any. Any state, I guess, or anywhere in the world you can visit that wants that makes you want to get your pilot's license. Definitely Alaska.

[B]

I, I was looking down at like all the lakes and you know around here everyone's got boats and you know all that to cruise around in. Every single lake. Like every house that was on the lake down there had a plane out front.

[D]

Float plane.

[B]

That is the Alaskan boat.

[A]

So what'd your parents think when you had a plane pick you and your brother up from it? Looked like they were, if I saw it correctly, they were standing out watching you guys take off.

[B]

It's exactly what you think. They got their phones out, facing them. Wrong, wrong finger in front of the camera. Just imagine your parents trying to take a video.

[E]

So you didn't even get the insta story?

[B]

Well, I got the insta story for me, but.

[A]

Hi, Grant.

[D]

Bye, Cody.

[B]

That, that is what my mom did. She's just waving.

[E]

Was she crying because she was so proud that her friend. That her son chartered a pj.

[B]

Was not a pj was a pp.

[A]

There's a mid sized PP.

[B]

I could hold 5 people.

[E]

So. I mean, have you spent that much time with your family in.

[B]

Not in a long time. And I don't need to do it again.

[E]

You still said it into the mic. They could still hear it.

[B]

I know, but it's quieter.

[E]

I mean, I just. I can't even really imagine the dynamic. It did seem like you were really having a good time. Like you're posting, you and your brother, you're drinking wine together, like you were chilling. It looked.

[A]

It looked like me.

[E]

Yeah, it looked like you were having a good time.

[B]

Nice up there. Nice to get away, see some different scenery. But I feel like Alaska is kind of like the more inconvenient Montana.

[E]

That should be their slogan.

[B]

It's like seven hours to get there. It's. There's no roads anywhere. The roads are all trash. It's just like. It's the same scenery. It's all mountains.

[C]

Yeah, I love that.

[A]

So.

[C]

So Montana is the frontier.

[B]

Alaska is the last frontier. No roads and no bars and everything's inconvenient.

[D]

What's the lady situation like up there?

[B]

All Gils. Just all gils.

[E]

But gils.

[A]

So Gil. Yeah, it's not a grand.

[B]

There was no. No chicks under 50 in that town.

[A]

But they were all goodlo gils.

[B]

Yeah, there's a few goodlooking ones.

[D]

A few. But I mean if they're a Gil, that means that you would.

[B]

There was a few. Yeah. Yeah.

[E]

Really?

[C]

Yeah. I guess we could clear that up, like in order for them to be a guil. They have to be, you know, if.

[E]

Has to be in there.

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

Otherwise they're just grandmas.

[C]

Yep, yep, yep.

[E]

But was there any single ladies on your parents RV trip?

[B]

All couples.

[E]

They were all coupled up. Couples you do have a history with. Yeah.

[B]

What's the next topic we're covering?

[A]

Really?

[C]

He has a history of consulting.

[E]

Consulting.

[A]

I wasn't sure if there was actually a real thing that happened.

[C]

Consulting can turn into a lot of things.

[E]

You're right. I'm sorry. You actually have a history of bringing couples closer. You have the business card and everything.

[B]

Unwillingly have the business cards. But.

[E]

Yeah, I'll throw a picture of it up.

[B]

Please, please blur some certain aspects of that.

[E]

But your number, that's already been leaked.

[C]

No, just the really aggressive tagline of I married couples.

[A]

Jesus.

[E]

Oh gosh.

[D]

Yeah, I can.

[C]

For your sake, we'll move on.

[E]

Yeah. It did look like a fun trip though. I'm. I'm. I'm glad you went. It was nice, you know, everybody kind of took off, did their own thing. We. We held down cormorant though, so. Don't worry.

[B]

I saw you got some good stuff.

[A]

Pretty quiet around here.

[E]

Yeah, it was quiet around here. It was. It was odd. Honestly. It was odd. Please don't ever leave me again.

[A]

Yeah, that's right. It was pretty quiet. Yeah. You guys still had a good time on Saturday? Ev, what'd you do back home?

[D]

Real low key weekend. Didn't get into much really.

[E]

I'll believe that for a second.

[D]

You know, rode some dirt bikes, drank some Tony's. You know, pretty standard run of the mill weekend.

[C]

Thursday or Friday, you left. You go, hey, is it cool if I take the Big Wheel? And you know, it's one of those. I'm like, of course.

[A]

I didn't even notice it was gone.

[D]

And I. I didn't actually ride it that much because I found out it is not as capable as a regular dirt bike that all my friends had.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

So I think I kind of parked it and just borrowed a bike for most of the weekend.

[E]

So that's why I came back. Not broken.

[D]

Yeah, she's just as good as when she left.

[C]

It was pretty interesting seeing the jump that you guys had gone. And then I saw Evan hit it last on the Big Wheel and it looked like you didn't know what you're doing, but I knew that it was just cuz you were on the Big Wheel.

[D]

No, the. The Big Wheel is. It's just a novelty. It's super cool. It's a good way. Ton of fun to ride it in the right circumstances. But I went to like a really fun trail system with a bunch of my friends that have like brand new dirt bikes. Big wheel just. I was struggling. I could have done better on the R6.

[E]

What would people say if you started just riding that thing around?

[D]

I kind of want to do it now that you say that you should just hang up to sell the KTM.

[E]

Nope.

[C]

R6.

[D]

All right, fair.

[E]

Sorry, Gavin. The big wheel is kind of like what a three wheeler is to a four wheeler and a dirt bike. It's not good at either. It's just kind of right in the middle. It's cool, but it's cool.

[D]

No, I can appreciate novelty. Everyone sees it. It's like, oh, that's so sick. And. And then maybe they take a little lap around like yeah, it's super cool. But when it just comes down to it, it's just much more inconvenient than a real dirt bike.

[C]

I love that word to describe it because I think it's really accurate. But like, can you imagine how hurt Gavin would be if. If someone described a three wheeler as a novelty? I don't think it is. I personally don't think it is. But if it was Gavin, you're just. These three wheelers are just, just a novelty thing. He'd be like, don't tell me that.

[A]

They kind of are. I mean. No, really, they, they are. They are becoming more of a novelty obviously as time goes on.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

As the vehicles that are coming out are like immensely capable.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Honestly though, I think a three wheeler may be the best tool to learn how to wheelie because they are super stable. Having the two wheels in the rear and the front is so light. As long as you got a proper brake, which most of those 83 wheelers don't have. But if you can get one with a proper rear brake, I think it's the perfect learning tool. But training wheels, well, there you go.

[E]

So ev, when I. When I was thinking about, well actually it's kind of a two parted deal, I was thinking about my buddy Evan who maybe may not be the best with money. And I also love to go on these car auction sites and look where you can buy cars from auction and they may have problems. They may be good. You know, I've always been some as.

[D]

Is just like me might have some problems.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I was going to say get what you get.

[E]

Yeah. They might be good though. You never know. So I was scrolling through one of the forms that posts different Cars in there. And someone bought a 2000, a 2015 Toyota 4Runner SR5. Pretty generic car, right?

[A]

Sweet.

[E]

It's got frame damage, transmission problem, open recall. And yeah, it's basically. It's messed up, right? So you put in bids and all the bids are binding. When you put the money in, it, it goes. This guy accidentally, instead of putting in $12,000 for this shitty Toyota.

[D]

Don't tell me.

[E]

Put in $112,000. Sold.

[C]

No, imagine.

[A]

So the money's gone.

[E]

The money's gone. The minute you put in, it's just. It's gone.

[C]

There's got to be again, so like, hard bid.

[D]

That gives me anxiety.

[C]

The nitty gritty. Like he's got to bring in like a lawyer, right?

[E]

I mean, I mean, technically, to save him.

[C]

To save his ass. 100,000.

[D]

He probably checked boxes that said he knew what he was doing.

[E]

I know. And just did it so fast. I mean, you bid on him multiple.

[A]

Larried up buying cars off auction.

[D]

I mean, I do get lared and go on ebay once in a while. It's usually just records and underpants and shitty phone case.

[A]

But can you imagine if you use Amazon?

[C]

No, dude, he doesn't.

[A]

Yeah, you're like stuck in that like 2007 era of the Internet. Like, you just.

[D]

We'll see who's laughing when MySpace comes back.

[A]

You look at Evans MySpace, it's like the most up to date pop. Posted like right before us about to run a podcast.

[D]

Don't worry, you guys are my top friends.

[E]

Oh, I missed that. Ken got me into Facebook when I was young because we would play the different games on it and his parents, or my parents, rather, were pissed at him.

[A]

Same. Mine were pissed when I got a.

[E]

Facebook for being introduced to the online world. And I gotta imagine if you could have told them in that moment that I would weekly spew my fun life and then an hour and a half long, telling different stories, they would have had a panic attack. Hundreds of thousands of people.

[C]

Oh, for sure, actually, though. And I remember that, like I was on the side of things. Like my social media was. If I could keep it away from my parents, I would. Absolutely. But Facebook, I was, it was just fine. Oh, you got a Facebook, that's cool. And I'd show them like, yeah, I'm just posting pictures. I. I went to the pumpkin patch last week. No, but they didn't even. Like they knew about that. Like, they just knew that was right down the road. They were like, okay, well, maybe you shouldn't do that. But Facebook was fine. I just remember my best friend at the time. Like, he's like, yeah, I can't have a Facebook till I'm 18. And I wanted to, like, say some to his dad. I wanted to be like, you know, I'll be like, what the.

[E]

Are you.

[C]

How shelter do you want him, Dude?

[A]

Some people, like, were so afraid of that online world. Like, they thought like, oh, if you, you know, posted a picture on the Internet, like, people are going to, like, come and find you.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Oh, your name, your birthday's out there, like, all that.

[E]

Yeah. Now it's used for us to remember people's birthdays. Yeah. You see it on Facebook.

[C]

I wouldn't remember anyone's birthday if it wasn't on social media. If there wasn't a birthday cake next to your name on Snapchat, there's no way. I mean, your guys's maybe, but, like, everyone else's.

[D]

What's my birthday?

[C]

No idea. March.

[E]

No, we were in Vegas.

[A]

No.

[C]

Well, March 15th.

[E]

You're both.

[A]

No, we were. We were in. We were in California. San Diego.

[D]

The first year. Yeah. And that's when you offered me the job. Yep. On my birthday. You'll never forget that. On a beach in. Yeah.

[C]

San Diego.

[D]

Yeah. Drinking mimosas. But then the last year.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

March.

[C]

March 22nd. All right. We're closer.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

When's my birthday, Evan?

[C]

I know.

[D]

August 13th.

[C]

Nope, that's today, bro.

[E]

That's today. You didn't know that?

[C]

I mean, so, yeah, as we're filming this, aug, it is August 13th. So I just. I love how you, like, guessed it. And you're like, I didn't even know that was today.

[E]

Have we ever really talked about that? Like, what. The process. What happened when we hired Evidence at that beach bar in San Diego?

[A]

I think we have, but have we? Yeah. You know, Evan was explaining about how he wanted to get into YouTube and he had had this kid come out and film, you know, for him and whatever, but it just didn't really turn out that good or whatever. He filmed and edited it for him and he's like, yeah, it's just tough because, like, I show up and I'm on, you know, your guys's thing, and it's like put out there in such a well packaged thing and whatever. And then when someone else says it's just like, it just was a lower quality or whatever, he's like, yeah, I don't even know where to start. Well, we were actually thinking about hiring John if you want to go full time. And then Pretty much called his boss the next like an hour later.

[D]

No, no, no, you had the text.

[A]

You had texted him.

[D]

Texted him. Yeah, well. And it wasn't even so much that I was really even trying to like, like I don't even know what. But with.

[E]

Fuck.

[D]

I think it wasn't even so much that I was like trying to like really get into YouTube so much. Like I just thought it was cool. And hanging out with you guys is obviously was unreal, but it was more just being so over the routine. I was working that moving asbestos just so over it. Wanting to do anything else.

[A]

And so what? What. Obviously that was very hard work. And like, I mean, would you say shitty work? Like.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

Sucked.

[D]

Yeah, like it, like it did. Like there's a million shitty jobs out there. So I don't want to say, oh this was so much worse than the next one. But. No, it was your standard shitty construction job. Like. Yeah.

[E]

Except for yours was working with deadly chemicals.

[D]

Oh yeah.

[E]

They don't let children around.

[D]

Yeah, no, I got like 15 more years. I'm die.

[A]

So yeah, what's up with that? What's the deal with that? So if you, you were.

[C]

That's what he asked after. He said, yeah, I, I have 15 years left. Well, he says, yeah, what's up with that?

[D]

I kind of joke about like the timer, but so they say there's a. Like it's like 25 to 40 years is the latency period. The asbestos. You breathe it in, whatever, and it'll just like sit there and then it just hits. And I think they say that like the average life expectancy after realizing you have an asbestos, asbestos related disease is like three to six months or some crazy thing. So you just be cruising along chilling, boom, massive cancer, dead.

[C]

But.

[E]

But you took the proper precautions to keep that off your body while the respirators, right?

[D]

I mean unless I needed a smoke break or was just a little sore of wearing a mask and probably take it off. No, I. No, there's a lot of levels. But more of the story is you definitely get exposed. Like you can do everything right and you're still gonna like, dude, they don't pay expose.

[E]

No kidding.

[D]

No they don't. No. There. It's probably not worth it, but like at the time kid right out of high school start making like some serious money. Like you just do it like sign your life away, put me to work. That's all there is to it.

[E]

I guess it is true. I mean when you compare salaries of something like that, you're like Yeah, I could go work at the parts counter somewhere and make this amount of money or I could go do this and work my ass off and get extra hours in overtime and then I have the money to buy dirt bikes and go on trips and do all the stuff that you want to do. I mean, I totally get how make sense. I was just talking to a kid today, he was like, yeah, I started doing concrete because I really wanted to go snowmobiling and concrete guys don't work in the winter and I make a bunch of money in the summer.

[D]

Yeah, I think there's a lot of seasonal workers. They just 80, 90 hours a week in the summer and then just, yeah, winter off, fish, ice fishing, snowmobiling.

[A]

Honestly, it gave me if that works for you, that bad of a deal, man. Like just chilling in the winter, you know. Cause you get unemployment and all that.

[D]

And then just personally though, I like the summer though. So it sucks to be like booked out all summer. It's like, ah, yeah, winter suck.

[E]

I feel like you still, even now, like make the most of your time. Like a lot of people work and then they go home and they're tired and then they don't do anything all weekend. They watch tv. But I feel like you were always hitting bike races, you're doing ice races, you're going here with the buddies. Like, you know, I feel like you're always out and about. Even when you leave here, we can have a big week where you have to work freaking 15 hours a day all day here and then you go home and you somehow go harder than you did all week here.

[A]

Yeah, I was telling my dad that he was asking about you and I was like, honestly, when Evan goes home, he does way more dangerous than he does here.

[D]

Honestly, it really is probably more dangerous. Way, way less. Yeah, way looser. That's a good word to put it. Yeah, just. But I think that's how I got here. That's true mentality and those hobbies. And honestly, I have the best group of friends back home. Like we have so much fun. It's amazing. I try to share it like on the Snapchat, like you get to see a little bit of the back home life.

[A]

The home.

[D]

It's been fun. Yeah.

[E]

Rose in a Snapchat plug. Sickening.

[D]

I shouldn't have done that.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

I thought you were going to start listening up. Shout out, Slim. Shout out. Cousin Joe.

[E]

Evan. Chef. Did we ever tell you that that RV trip was almost like your test run in a way?

[D]

I think I like. Yeah, I Kind of like heard that or maybe like after. Not like right on the spot, but a little later. Yeah.

[E]

I heard a rumor that because we, we talked about it as a crew and we're like, we'd never hired anybody on that point. Like this crew is so tight. And we're like, we really get along with Evan. We love having him around. Like, can we afford to have him around? Which man we could have never imagined can't afford. Exactly. I mean, you know that. And so we're like, well, let's go on the RV trip. And if, if we can spend that many days, two weeks locked in a 20 some foot metal box together and still want to hang out, you know, I think it's probably worth it, man.

[D]

You guys were lucky that I was still like on my best behavior.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. You weren't bringing egg salad and all the time. That was the next year, the first RV trip.

[C]

If you would have brought. Can you imagine? He brings egg salad the first trip. And we're like, no, we can't do with this, man.

[D]

I think I, I really knew CJ and Ken like the least because I got to go on the dirt biking, the snowmobiling trips. So I'd spent a pretty decent amount of time. Ryan, Ben and Micah, quite a bit with Micah, you know, stay up late, whatever. So it kind of makes sense. Like, yeah, you guys probably didn't know me.

[C]

That is true. I would say, like coming into that trip, like, you know someone who's your best friend, I go, oh, probably Evan. Yeah, that is true. And then, sorry. But yeah, yeah. And you even said that you're like, you know, I hope like I. That C.J. and, and Ken are chill with me.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

And I'm like, of course they are.

[A]

Like you weren't doubting that.

[C]

He's like, give me a break, dude.

[A]

Like very against it.

[D]

Many times.

[A]

I'm kidding.

[D]

He's like, come on. Kidding, Kidding.

[A]

Of course.

[C]

And the rest is history. Honestly, the rest is absolute history. Yeah. Like Ryan said, we. We definitely didn't know if we'd ever bring someone on. But now I don't know.

[E]

Without it.

[C]

Yeah, exactly.

[E]

Well, without you.

[C]

Yeah, without it. Without that Evan bro character.

[E]

Without that stinky hinder.

[D]

I'll drink to that.

[C]

Cheers, brother.

[E]

I feel like you two really were the tightest because you two are certified chillers.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

Like I guarantee you. And we got a couple buddies in town from Canada. I guarantee I will see Snapchats at 3am tonight of you guys up hanging.

[A]

That's chilling. Yeah. You Guys are way better chiller than me. And no offense, but really just do nothing and do it.

[C]

But also like.

[A]

And stay up all night doing it.

[C]

I know. I was just thinking about this today.

[A]

Whereas me, I'm like, I gotta get to bed, right?

[C]

I'm almost like, almost. It's like a fine line. I should say I'm equally as productive during, let's say, the work week. If I am just a really good boy and go to bed, you know, and. And hanging out with a girlfriend and just really tame and vice versa. Staying up late, doing like till 3am with Evan. Hitting golf balls at the water truck. Yeah, I'm like, just as productive doing both things.

[E]

That's because you somehow survive without sleep. You're like, whatever, the opposite of a sloth.

[C]

Weird. It's weird. I actually did run myself down on the merch drop. I was actually pretty bummed you're getting sick or. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, I. Lack of sleep, you know, Staying up way later than I should be, like, just kind of just cranking on it. Not even being like the craziest productive, but like, still working on it. And I'm like, fuck, dude. I'm like, not getting sleep. And then I got sick. Like, I'm sick right now and I'm pretty bummed about it. However, most of the time it's crazy.

[A]

And I didn't mean it in like you guys aren't doing anything because you are having fun. And realistically that's like the most important. I'd say it might be the most important. I mean, what's the point of life if you're not enjoying it? So, I mean, hitting golf balls at the water truck at 3 in the morning, out there drinking.

[D]

Tony 600 on the line.

[A]

Yeah, that's fun. That's fun. Honestly, like, I wish I was there for that, you know, Money.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

But Mike, I. I do. You gotta fix your sleep schedule, man.

[D]

For sure.

[C]

Especially.

[A]

I don't even know how you do it.

[C]

But like lately, like this last week with the merch shop, like I was saying, relatively, like getting a lot of shit done. But dude, just. It's a universal thing. Whether I'm saying up till 2 or 3 or 4 or 5. Sleeping until 11, let's just say 11. Like, that's. I try not to sleep any past that. But 11 or 11:30, man. The day after that. Sorry. The day after, like the day after you wake up goes like this. It's like two. Exactly. But is it half gone? I know you guys wake up like really early but is. I know the work day is half gone, but like is the day half gone as in like I'm not like justifying anything skewed perspective. But. But yeah, that. I think that's the toughest thing. It's like yeah, truly the two o', clock, five o', clock, seven o' clock and then it's nighttime. I'll. I'll change one day. You think you'll be able to convince me? Like, dude, Waking up at 8, it's tough for me. But man, those four hours before noon are like gold.

[A]

Oh wow.

[D]

I just can't believe that you're saying hang out. Unbelievable.

[A]

You should start.

[D]

Every person with a job ever knows.

[A]

That wake up at like, wake up at like 6 in the morning.

[C]

But see that.

[A]

Which is.

[C]

That will never happen for me.

[A]

No, but just you should try it once. You wake up at like 6 and then you go and make a cup of coffee and since you're up earlier than most people probably start their day. Seven, eight. But like since around here it's maybe nine, you have this, you have this free time to just do whatever you want and you can sit there and, and sip some coffee, get your maybe clear. Yeah. And just do. And, and kind of putz around. Do whatever. Like the few things that you maybe got to do that just are personal. I don't know. It's just, it is nice. You really start to enjoy that, I think.

[C]

Yep.

[A]

I guess you probably do that at night.

[C]

Yes. I 100 agree with that though, because I do do exactly that at night.

[A]

But, but you can't drink black coffee during that time.

[C]

Exactly. And on the off chance that you know, maybe like on one wanting to do something or, or anyone. Anyone. Like I'm talking like, yeah, of course people are going to want to do 7, 8, 9, 10. But yeah, on the off chance that someone's like wanting to do something from, from 8 until 1 in the morning. That, that's, that's a problem. It'd be like if someone was trying to come up to you at 7:30 and was like let's do something. And then you're like well no, this is my time. But you, you would say no then. But so, so I think once you. If there's ever a time that I can find out that the value that those three hours before work are more valuable than. Cause I already agree that they are. It's just like a lot of change. Yeah. Yeah. Getting there.

[D]

You're talking about that valuable four hours, eight to noon, midnight to 4:00am that's when, like, I think the majority of the stories, the funny videos, all the good stuff happens then.

[C]

Don't tell me that.

[E]

I mean. Yeah, but the problem is it's like Tuesday for Mike and he. That's like his six o' clock work day.

[C]

Right, Right. Exactly. Exactly. So it's like I'll find myself in those situations a lot. But yeah, it's like when I am working, then I'm like, I don't feel bad one second about being up late, you know, and hopefully getting up in the morning. But yeah, then it's like when I get tangled up doing the fun shit.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

Tough.

[E]

And catch a working groove too. There's nothing better than that. I get why you wouldn't want to quit.

[C]

I would say moral of the story is, like, it's not. It's not a good thing. It can be good, but it's not a good thing. Whereas, like, waking up early is, like, almost always a good thing.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

Like, when is that going to bite you in the butt?

[E]

I'd say, except for then you get tired at night.

[C]

And so that's another crazy thing is like, I don't, like, yawn anymore. It's crazy. Dude, I'm not joking. Like, I'm not. And before it was like, I just slept as long as I could sleep and. And that has kind of pulled back. Like now I just like, I just don't, like, yawn. Yes, I do, like, as a normal person, but I'm not. Like, I don't hit a. A point where I'm just like, oh, man, I'm just worn down right now. It's just like, when I'm up, I'm up. It's crazy.

[E]

Might have to do with the semi truckload of Celsius we go through every week.

[C]

Dude, if I ever am yawning 1 Celsius and it's like, you're back to it. I was dialed.

[E]

Did you guys see that? Elon and Mark Zuckerberg now called off their fight, literally a week after calling.

[C]

It back and forth, back and forth. And I'm like, I'm starting to believe that the whole thing is a hoax.

[A]

No, no. It sounds like Zuckerberg is about it, but obviously Elon, that's what.

[C]

Yeah, that's what I'm reading.

[A]

Would he do that? Why would he?

[D]

I wouldn't. For the culture, dude.

[C]

I mean, it. It would be absolutely the coolest thing to ever come out of right now. Ever.

[A]

Elon's for the culture, but Mark Zuckerberg actually probably beat him if he's like, obviously jiu jitsu, has training with boxing, but like he actually does combat sports. You'd think he would have the edge in that.

[C]

If I had to guess, I feel like he does.

[A]

Yeah. That's probably why Elon pulled out. And Elon's like so much for the culture.

[C]

Yeah, I'm kind of old. I mean older.

[B]

You just gotta look like. Elon's in his 50s. Mark Zuckerberg is like upper 30s, probably low 40s.

[A]

I mean maybe you could fill in for Elon since you're such a Tesla fan.

[B]

I'll pass.

[A]

And gets in there and fights. Mark Zuckerberg would be amazing.

[D]

Gotta let the knee heal up.

[A]

Well, he does.

[C]

I just don't know. I don't know. I want it to happen really bad as a. Essentially as a viewer.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

As a viewer in the. One of the millions of viewers in the statistics of wanting to have the. This happen. Like. Yeah, I want to watch it.

[D]

That, that would be the biggest pay per view event ever.

[C]

Ever. Probably ever. Absolutely.

[A]

I don't know. I don't know. I think it, it could be, but I also think it could be on the same level as like Jake Paul type of thing. But yeah, then again, I guess I just. It would get a lot of buzz. You're right. I think a lot of people would tune into it.

[C]

I just think it would be because of the poll.

[A]

I'm going back on it.

[C]

I think it was like people would.

[D]

Start putting big money on it. You'd start hearing these rumors, oh, million.

[A]

Be talking about it. You're hearing about this.

[C]

So you know like how, you know.

[A]

How like such a, a shitty fight.

[C]

If Mark Zuckerberg puts out a thing. Here's like, here's the, the link. This will just be in your feed for the fight.

[E]

You're right.

[D]

Wow.

[E]

They start charging like a fifty dollar pay per view fee. I can see like my dad's not going to tune in for that.

[A]

I think your dad would get. He would hear the buzz from some and he would go over there and probably sit down.

[D]

Right.

[E]

Maybe he and his buddies, they have like a garage.

[A]

But it would be one of those shitty fights kind of like back in the day, the YouTuber fights when they like it's their first boxing match, they're not really boxers and then it's just like kind of. Just a lot of like flailing and it's just not a whole lot of.

[D]

But anything but with their aura around them.

[A]

Oh, it would be amazing.

[D]

It would be fine. Like you're not going to want to. Anyone else have a shitty.

[A]

You might be laughing. That's true.

[B]

I think you would put it on more of like a rough and rowdy kind of.

[A]

They go to bars.

[B]

That'd be more of the show would be like a rough and rowdy kind of thing, but it's like chicks and.

[E]

Bikinis, holding up signs, stuff like that.

[B]

I think that's the only way they could make it entertaining.

[A]

So, yeah, what's the deal with that?

[E]

King David Portnoy sold Barstool to pen for 500 million. Obviously, he didn't get a check for 500 million. It went different places, all that type of stuff. So from what I understand is obviously Barstool is a pretty abrasive brand in many ways. In many ways. And so is Dave. And so because of what Dave's done in the past, he really shit on espn. ESPN is owned by Disney, the largest sports media company in the world. And Penn wanted to partner with ESPN to make a sports book, basically.

[A]

Right.

[E]

Be the hugest thing ever. Well, ESPN wouldn't work with them if they own Barstool. So Dave got barstool back for $1. Wow.

[D]

How does that work, though?

[A]

What a win.

[D]

I actually did see the memes got.

[A]

The money and he got his company back.

[D]

How does that work?

[E]

In which way?

[C]

I just want, like, maybe.

[D]

Why wouldn't someone else buy it for, like, more than a dollar? Like, how does he get the opportunity to buy it back for a dollar?

[E]

It's probably a good question. I bet you they had some type of deal worked out. And probably Dave didn't want to sell to anybody else because he was sick of being controlled by somebody else doing things. My friends that are hardcore, I think they go by stoolies, but like, Barstool people are pissed because they like Barstool. Sports is a sports thing. Not as like all of the clickbait podcast meme things that they do. So they were pissed. I just talked to them last night about it. Fired up.

[A]

So you think just like, it's gonna.

[E]

Be a bunch of shitty clickbait again. They're gonna just keep again Brianna and Brianna Chicken Fry and all.

[A]

They don't like Brianna Chicken Fry.

[E]

And I was like, yeah, guys, you're forgetting that she's one of the biggest people in that group. Like, that's where media's headed.

[C]

So you're saying that it's gonna go more to the clickbaity memes and podcasts and less.

[A]

I thought, more to sports.

[C]

I just, I. I honestly figured go the Same.

[E]

I think they'll be more of, like, a media company, which, I mean, they're crushing it at right now, but they are what they are. But I think they'll go probably more media.

[D]

But.

[C]

Yeah, have I wondered that, too. I was like, how is there not someone else that's like, well, I'll put up 550 million and I want to buy it over Dave Fortnite. I was just wondering that.

[E]

Yeah, I don't really know. I'm sure there was some deal. But I did see that if Dave sells, Penn gets, like, a certain percentage of whatever he sells it for. Yeah. So.

[C]

And then he said it was, like.

[E]

Penny's gift to him.

[D]

That could explain that. $1.

[E]

That makes sense.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And he said he's never gonna sell until.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

Tell the day he dies. I genuinely. It's tough because, like, I really love bars with sports no matter what they do. Like, it's weird. I just, like, it's kind of just part of my life. I just follow them, watch their content, indulge in it. But people say the same about them that they've been saying. It's like, the comments are just like, when are you gonna post sports? People have been saying the same shit about them for the last five years.

[D]

I thought he just ate pizzas.

[C]

Yeah, dude. Oh, man. The pizza reviews are pretty funny, too. I just watched the recent one where, like, he's, like, reviewing, and then the manager comes out and he's like, hey, like, did you get permission to film here? And then he's kind of like, dude, what the. I'm Dick. I'm Dave Portnoy. And he's like, you need to get off my patio. He said, this is what he calls it, my patio. And then he got the managers, got fired the next day.

[A]

Oh, man, what a bad one. Idiot.

[C]

And they brought him back to do another one. But still. And then I just love. The top comment was like, did this affect your pizza sales?

[E]

I bet it did. I mean, I guess I don't know how you negatively affect a place, like, really permanently. Like, even if someone went and on a local establishment.

[A]

True.

[E]

It's just based on somebody's actions. I still don't know if I would be like, that place. Ken boycotted a local bar one time because they messed up his food. He went back.

[C]

He boycotted him for 30 days.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Yeah.

[B]

I won't go back for a little bit, but I still go back.

[D]

What did they do? What was the.

[B]

They forgot my food order, like, two times in a row, put in A put in a group food order and they just didn't put mine in.

[E]

I thought it was they forgot like a salad or something.

[B]

No, they forgot the entire meal.

[D]

I. I believe it was around our RV trip this spring and maybe a little before, and then a little after. Ryan, that happened. Oh yeah. Like five times in three weeks. That you were always the one that got shafted. You got the wrong food, no food or. Yeah, just missed completely. You know, there's five to 10 people at every meal every time. Ryan is the one that got messed up.

[E]

It does suck too. When you're really hungry and then your food doesn't count.

[D]

It's like everyone's done eating, ready to go, and then they bring yours out.

[E]

In a to go box. I got to eat a cold burger on the car ride home after being there for an hour and a half.

[D]

But I will say you have been beyond respectable in all those situations. Never chewed them out. I mean, because there is really nothing you can do. You just gotta accept it, gotta take it.

[E]

It's. It's tough. I. Someone just forgot my food order last week. Actually, we were there for two hours and 45 minutes. Me, Alondra, my dad, Jesus. And it was. None of us were too stoked. Leaving was like, what are you gonna do? Like, the lady obviously felt super bad about it. Like, people make mistakes. I make mess ups in my job.

[C]

It is tough because it is tough. It makes you not want to go out to eat though. That's three hours out of your life.

[D]

Yeah.

[E]

When you go to dinner at 6 and you get home at 9:30, you're like, oh, that was my whole night waiting for food. If you want to leave, you're there having fun drinks, you know, chilling. But when you're waiting for your food.

[A]

The whole time, it's tough to get after the waitress or the waiter too because it's like, I mean, what? It's not really their fault. Yeah, look.

[E]

Oh, people look over, you're like chewing out the waitress. Like there's no good way to do that. No matter what happens, it's not gonna.

[A]

Fix your problem either.

[E]

Exactly, exactly.

[C]

But also like little transition to going out to eat now it's like. So I just went to McDonald's today. Got tell me this is if this is a lot, but two quarter pounder meals. It's a lot burger. Well for me instead. Okay, but two quarter pounder meals. So you got fries, burger, drink, and then grabbed McDonald's. Yep. Grabbed a ten piece McNuggets just for.

[E]

A little hors d'.

[C]

Oeuvre. It was $32.

[E]

McDonald's ain't cheap, but.

[C]

But no, neither is anything anymore. I mean, I just like going back to when you're like, Jimmy John's, that, that ain't cheap anymore. But I'm like two meals from McDonald's plus just the one thing it'd be if I like grabbed a coffee or an ice cream.

[A]

Good food either.

[C]

No, it's not good. And, and yeah, of course I enjoy it. I. I love McDonald's. Yeah. Yeah. Like, I love McDonald's. I love it. It's good.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

Guilty pleasure. Absolutely. But I was like, $32, like, that's really expensive. As in, like, I actually could go to the bar and grill and get a burger, fries, and a drink for, for two people for about $35.

[D]

Yeah, like 35.

[C]

Crazy. And so then it just like got my whole brain going about inflation and everything and how like the Barbie movie and Oppenheimer, like, huge, huge, huge. They're like, no, not yet. I want to see both of them. How it's like the biggest in the box office ever. And I'm like, are we, are we adjusting for inflation here? Made the most money ever in the box office. I'm like, but are we adjusting for inflation? Because just like everything else is like, inflation's kicking our ass right now. And we're all just like, we need Hulu and McDonald's.

[E]

Hey, keep paying for it.

[C]

I know, it's crazy.

[E]

I feel like there's some things like 35 bucks at Buffalo Wild Wings, you're like, sick. Good for it. But you go to McDonald's, it's like paying for some things, like let's say putting new wheels on my truck. Couple grand, I'm like, done. But I have to put new wiper blades on that. I'm like, dude, $32 in wiper blades. I throw a little miniature fit about it internally. Yeah.

[D]

Run them till metal.

[E]

Exactly. So you can't even see you're gonna.

[D]

Replace the windshield before the blade.

[E]

Exactly. Yeah, exactly.

[D]

I don't let myself get bound up about the overpriced McDonald's and the wipers because at the end of the day, I'm gonna go throw 200 in the pull tab box.

[B]

Lose it all.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

Evan did they gotta have a picture of you. So I think our local pull tab jar sponsors, the outdoors club, they could have a picture of you on the wall. Yeah.

[A]

You're whole handedly no the bars.

[D]

You either have a picture of me saying like, top spender customer, or no.

[E]

Do not let this man inside.

[D]

Either way, I'm on the wall.

[E]

Oh, man.

[C]

I found out today that in Switzerland you can be denied citizenship for being too annoying.

[A]

Really?

[C]

Yeah. And I, I, I love it. I love that citizenship, though. So there's this chick, apparently, that was like, trying to move there probably from, you know, a neighboring country. She gained a reputation in her, the village that she was trying to live in for campaigning publicly against local traditions in which she believe violated animal rights. And everyone else is like, dude, f this chick.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And they denied her citizenship because she was so annoying.

[A]

That's another reason.

[C]

Yeah, that was, of course, I think it's a clickbaity title, but it's the.

[E]

Annoying, like, problematic based on what she's doing.

[D]

I'm stoked to hear that. How it panned out.

[C]

That's what I mean. I was like, I read it. I'm just like, I love that. And of course we'd never do like, anything like that here, but can you.

[D]

Imagine being denied citizenship for being too stinky then?

[A]

Yeah, you wouldn't be allowed anywhere.

[C]

You'd have to be so stinky. Like, you'd have to be a dude. I just watched the spongebob episode where he, where he, like, didn't have any food left. He wanted to make an ice cream sundae, but instead he made ketchup and onions and peanuts. And then he had really stinky breath and he thought he was ugly. He scared everyone off. And then he made Patrick eat it.

[D]

I wanted to not know what you're talking about. I know exactly, exactly what you're.

[C]

I remember that episode after I watched it, I just like, we're, we're, we're moving fast here. But I was like, Man, SpongeBob is my favorite show. It's so good.

[A]

You were just watching that today or this weekend?

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

You flip on spongebob just as something to watch sometimes.

[C]

Yeah, yeah.

[E]

It is light tv.

[C]

It really was. Yeah.

[D]

I was going to say, how stone do you have to be to stage.

[C]

Of the game in the middle of a Saturday? Yeah, yeah, yeah, Something like that. And then the next episode that came on after the one that I was just talking about was the one where he's like, watching the see an enemy that kind of looks like. And then he's like, Gary. And changes the channel. And then I'm like, that's the kind of humor that I loved about spongebob that it would get. Like a kid would be like, haha. And then an adult would be like, that's funny.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

That's the kind of humor I was looking for out of the Super Mario Bros. Movie. Oh, you know, being Jack Black was in it.

[A]

The Hidden. The Hidden.

[C]

Yeah. I don't know. There's got to be a name for.

[A]

You have to. Yeah, it's like, the underlying.

[C]

I just love it. It's so funny.

[E]

I. I just looked over at our buddy Spencer and Jake that are in town from Canada. They came down to hang out this weekend, have a good time with everybody. Everybody goes and leaves, including Mike. And is Mike talking about them on Friday?

[D]

Yeah.

[E]

No. No. C.J. and I were here. Even Evan left. And as Mike is talking about spending Saturday in bed watching spongebob, I just watched both their faces look at you and go, what the. That's what he left us for.

[C]

Yeah. I don't have anything to say, dude. I was. I was booked up.

[E]

I'm glad there was a book, not a brick.

[A]

That's what I was gonna say.

[C]

I was booked up with the girlfriend. Yeah, it was. It was bummer. I think the worst part is, is that, like. I mean, you guys want to know something? That I could be criminally charged with abandoning the boys. Yes.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

Yeah. Actually, there. There might be multiple charges on my account.

[A]

I was gonna say.

[E]

I.

[A]

We can say most.

[C]

We can. I will be criminally charged with abandoning the boys this weekend.

[A]

By the time Mike's gonna have a Saturday off, he's. It's gonna be like, winter or 20, 24.

[C]

Yeah, dude.

[A]

So, Mike, speaking of you and your girlfriend, what you think when. That. When the prank went down last week with the. The. Obviously the. If you guys didn't see it as a parasailor with the sign. The sign. Sydney, will you marry me? Micah, we were trying to obviously punk you and Ryan, so. Yeah, now you got both. You.

[C]

I was really interested, hearing. Well, I'll just get into it. I. I thought it was hilarious at first. At the very first glance, I thought she wasn't in on it either. So I, like, turned to her and I'm like, I'm sorry.

[A]

When you first saw it.

[C]

Apologize.

[A]

You said that. Really?

[C]

Yeah. Yeah. I was like, I'm sorry. This isn't real. I go, I did not set this up. I'm so sorry. This isn't real. Like, you said that?

[A]

Yeah, I don't even have that on.

[C]

Camera because it was like. It was the first thing I said. It was like, the first thing.

[A]

Maybe when the camera was turned.

[C]

As soon as I realized, like, what it said, I was just like, this isn't real. Like, I preface that right away because I'm like, I didn't set it up. I know if I set it up, obviously. So I didn't know she was in on it immediately.

[A]

You knew you were being punked?

[C]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

Only because obviously you're you. I well know it.

[C]

I'm used to it. But no, the reason I knew I.

[D]

Was being punked, because you didn't hire a paraglider. Get married.

[E]

Exactly.

[C]

Exactly. Like, to dumb it way down. I didn't h. I don't know who. Yeah.

[A]

But I think if you weren't you, like, if we would have just chosen one of our friends that we have never pranked before that aren't even on the channel, and then we did that to them, the same prank. Told their girlfriend. They would probably be really confused, cuz that's what we were going for.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

And then we were going for him and just utter shock, which he was.

[C]

And so then once. Once you. Once Ryan let out his utter shock and like, the cameras kind of were like, damn, Ryan's. This is kind of funny too. Then I was just like, dude, I don't even know. Then I started to get rattled, like, because I didn't know how. I didn't know how to. I didn't know how to. I didn't know what to say. I didn't know. I didn't know what. Yeah, just as much as you really didn't. I didn't know. I didn't. I had no idea, like, what to say because I thought she wasn't in on it. For the record, the way it got chopped in the video, like, it went a lot longer. People were like, yo, she like, like could have waited a little longer. It got chopped up a lot faster. Yeah, but, yeah, there was like a good two minutes there where we're just like. I don't know.

[E]

There was like a whole loop around the boat where nobody said anything. The boat was silent, and it was just Ben and CJ going like this.

[C]

And we're like, I don't know. I didn't. I. Again, I didn't set this up. Yeah, so it was awkward. I told Ryan. I was like, if. If I ever were to do that in real life, I'll ask you beforehand and it won't be so chaotic, I promise.

[E]

And I told him, I'll try to not act so surprised and disappointed.

[C]

Yeah, that's what happened. But I thought it was a really good prank. Like, I. I love a prank that keeps us truly on our toes. Yeah, I knew it. Was a prank, like, right away. But there's, like, more to it than that. It wasn't just, like, thoughts in the head. Yeah, a lot of thoughts in the head. A lot of, like, things that I should. That I was trying to think of to say. So, like, I was, like, very entertained by it, and I hope everyone else was, too.

[E]

What if he was, like, planning on proposing? You guys didn't know this, but he was planning on proposing, like, next week. And then that was a thought in my head.

[A]

Or that possibly Mike's the kind of guy who was like, he was already kind of playing on it, and then he didn't have the ring or nothing, but he was like, yeah, it.

[E]

Let's do it.

[A]

Let's do it. Like. Like, he might just turn and look and be like, dude.

[C]

But even, like.

[A]

Like, she just says yes, and he just, like, kisses her and just takes that thing, like, for a ride. He's just like, okay, we're good.

[E]

It would have been pretty funny if Sydney just went ballistic. Like, super excited. Oh, my God.

[A]

That's what we were telling her what to do. Yeah.

[E]

Really?

[C]

Like, because that would have made it even harder on me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, we heard the jokes, too. I was like, I don't think you can do that if you don't have, like, a. That ring. But can you imagine if I did? And then I don't have the ring.

[A]

Right now, but I'll get you one later.

[C]

Like, it's coming in the mail. You know, the jewelers are making it now.

[D]

Amazon prime jeweler.

[E]

Evan would have that ebay jewelry.

[D]

Why buy a brand new one? You save a bunch of money.

[E]

I almost spoiled somebody's marriage proposal once. One of our, like, decent friends, you know, like, kind of an acquaintance decent friend. Well, you know how, like, you had the friends that you see, and you're like, hey, how's it going? You talk to them a little bit, but you don't really know what's going on. So I saw them at a restaurant, and I was going up, going to the bathroom, sat down, went and talked to him. And I'm like, yeah, you guys just got engaged, right? Guy looks at me like, I just. Like, I spoiled his engagement. The girl goes, no, the evening of that, there was a engagement for them. Yeah.

[A]

Holy.

[E]

They were at Zorbas at lunch, and that night, he proposed.

[A]

Oh, wow.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

How did you know that they just got engaged or how did they hadn't. You're just assuming.

[E]

I just. They'd been together forever. I was like, oh, it Seems like they're probably. I just like.

[C]

I don't know, one of those things.

[E]

You just like, word blurt that, like, you think you know something about their life.

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

And it just came out of me. I just was like, oh, yeah, did you guys just get engaged? And they were about to.

[C]

As someone who talks too much and tells people too much, I have been not that severe of a situation. But, yeah, like, how does that happen? I'm just like, yeah, you start talking.

[E]

About like, oh, that's so cool that you and your girlfriend got the puppy. And they're like, different girlfriend. You know, one of those type of deals.

[D]

Why do people come up to you and they'll be like, was she the one from last time? Oh, oh, my God. And like, God bless my. My girlfriend now. But it happened. Yeah, so many times. I'm like, how is that? I would never, never use that line to anyone ever. I would never say, oh, is that the same girl as the last time I saw you? It's like, what are you thinking?

[E]

Yeah, what's the appropriate answer for that? There's no winning.

[D]

But like, how is that even a question? That's what I said.

[A]

Yeah, you're just setting them up for a bad time.

[D]

Exactly. It's unbelievable.

[C]

Pretty much like that. I mean, so maybe that's what they're trying to do.

[D]

Ev jam me up.

[A]

Maybe they're. Yeah, they're out to freaking jam you up.

[C]

That's funny.

[E]

Oh, man. What?

[C]

There's got to be like a psychology term for that of, like, speaking to someone about their saying the absolute wrong thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Thinking, you know something. Thinking that you're being polite by, like, trying to know something.

[E]

That's what I mean. It's not like, like, oh, did I meet you last time? Or like, if you're like, oh, is this the girl you just went on vacation with last winter? You know, then it's like, oh, well, you were mistaken. This one's just a straight up, like last time. Just like, is this the one you were with last time? I can't remember. She may be different, you know, you got so many different women.

[D]

Yeah. Oh, I met you two weeks ago. No, this is actually our first time hanging out.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[E]

That's a flub. You're like, my bad. I saw you with a girl. You were with the same girl, but it's like, oh, are you the same girl that I saw you with last weekend? And then it's someone new. Like, there's no winning on that one.

[D]

No.

[E]

What's another thing that you just, like, say the wrong thing at the wrong time. Kind of a king at it, dude.

[C]

I am. I'm like, literally the reason, like, we can call back to that. I'm like, the reason that cj, when you were like, why are you telling me this? It wasn't about me and you, but, like, I. When you said that, I was like, I am that person. I am that person. Telling someone, yes, someone could. Could you say, why are you telling me this all the time to me, dude? They could. And I'll be like, oh, I don't know, dude. I don't know why I'm telling you this, dude. I. I think I like to just, like, sound friendly. And sometimes when I'm trying to, like, sound friendly and be friendly, I just.

[A]

In the process, say something stupid.

[C]

But I'm just, like, telling them, like, things they just don't know about.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

Or don't, you know? Or like, let's say someone comes here to buy something on Facebook Marketplace. I'm not ruining the sale by any means, but I'm like, telling them, like, yeah, we got the Papios. We got like six of them. Like, we. We love it. They're so fun. And they're like, sick.

[E]

I'm here to buy a snowmobile.

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

I don't even know.

[C]

I am not even fans of you guys. I'm like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, we'll.

[E]

Catch that at Heydays. Sometimes you'll be telling some random. Exactly like, oh, yeah, our buddy Kevin.

[C]

Yeah.

[E]

He just is going to bring over the.

[C]

The water truck.

[E]

The water truck this afternoon, and we're gonna. Or this week, and we're gonna do.

[A]

Thing, and you know Kevin.

[E]

Yeah, you know Kevin.

[C]

No, but I don't do that. I don't go like, oh, you know Kevin.

[A]

No, you don't say that. We say that, like, sarcastically.

[C]

Of course.

[A]

You know Kevin. Yeah, it's like these guys that don't even.

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

You know.

[C]

No, but that's a good example. It's actually a really great example because I'll actually, like, talk to people about Kevin, assuming they've maybe seen him on the channel, even though he's not a face on the channel.

[E]

And then they're just like, okay, I'm not too familiar.

[A]

You can both kind of do that.

[C]

Yeah, no, like, admittedly, absolutely.

[A]

Just be like, I do that. Yeah, you, like, just, like, go up to someone that's an acquaintance of ours that has never met another acquaintance of ours. Like, like, let's just say David from 5 and 9, you big. Yeah, David.

[E]

He.

[C]

There's like, yeah, I totally do that.

[D]

And.

[C]

And I, like, I hope to think that they most of the time walk away and they're just like, yeah, he was friendly.

[A]

I think they're just confused.

[C]

No, but that's what I mean. I hope they don't walk away and go, like, I don't know what the hell, Micah.

[A]

I think they're just like. I don't know what he was talking about, but I'm not, like, mad.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

I don't know what. What he was saying.

[D]

I'm sure they're happier to hear Micah talking like that than to run into Donnie Thornberry at the bar.

[C]

What the hell is he saying?

[E]

Saying, I think the worst thing. And I do this all the time. I'll met someone, like, three times. Nice to meet you.

[A]

Same.

[E]

And they go, we met.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

You gotta say, good to see you.

[E]

Many times. I know I did it to Jake.

[C]

I know I did it to Jake. He said, we met in Revelstoke. And I go, well, how the fuck am I supposed to remember that? But we did. We absolutely met in Revelstoke.

[E]

It's like the toughest thing, and you want to be friendly, but sometimes you just. You just do it the wrong way and it. It really sucks, and you feel like a real idiot. I do it to Alondra's friends a lot because I meet them sporadically, and they'll be like, we have met many times. We went on vacation.

[C]

What do you even. What do you.

[D]

What?

[C]

Yeah, there's nothing you can say to that.

[A]

Use on that? No.

[C]

Okay.

[D]

Turn around. Oh, I remember.

[A]

Jesus.

[C]

But yeah, there's nothing you can really, like, say to it and. And, like, save it.

[A]

No.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

This is always being a nice person.

[E]

But, yeah, no, you just messed up.

[C]

I mean, you don't. You got. You don't do that siege, Like, I mean, I just, like, do. Just because of the sheer amount of people that are. That we're meeting. Just like the.

[A]

I don't think we've met. No.

[C]

Ever.

[E]

Good for you.

[C]

Hey, good for you.

[A]

There's, like, good to see you. That's smart.

[E]

That's nice. On not assuming.

[A]

I don't want to ask anyone how they're doing, because some people are having, like, they're not doing very well. Like, they're, like, pissed off about something I want them to start. Then they're like, well, actually, I. This just happened. My tire got flat going here and this and that. So I'm good to see you.

[E]

That is good. That is a good one.

[C]

Hey, props to people for actually opening up. I was just going to say, like, kind of the opposite. You know when you ask someone how they're doing?

[B]

Well, how.

[C]

When you ask someone how they're doing.

[E]

Good, man. How about you?

[C]

Do you really? Yeah, I was like. I was like, I always hate asking people that because it's the same answer every time. Not that I'm looking for good, elaborate, but yeah, I'm just like, man, they asked me that too. I just go, I'm doing well. I try to switch it up and be grammatically correct.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

The only reason I do that is to sound different and not say, I'm doing good. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

I do agree with that, though. I hate pretty good. You just see somebody, you're in the C store, just grabbing a drink and some snacks for the road. Hey, man, good to see. How you doing? Oh, man. Bad kids got headlights.

[C]

Malaria. Yeah.

[E]

Jesus. And they just start going on about something, and you're just like, ah, man, I, I. If you need someone to talk to, always be there. You know? Never want to say that, but sometimes you're just like, oh, I wasn't really expecting a bat.

[C]

Maybe I'm looking for that too. I don't get that. No one opens up to me about that stuff. They just say, I'm doing good.

[E]

Maybe it's because you don't have a very friendly face.

[C]

It must not.

[A]

They're probably afraid you're gonna bully them.

[C]

I need a shade. Yeah. I know what you did in high school.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I'm not telling you. Dude, I haven't shaved my beard off since 2019.

[E]

Like, knock on baby face.

[C]

Yeah. Ever. Yeah, I want to, but I'm scared because, like. Yeah, but I mean, it'd be fun, but, like, it's not fun, like, having a double chin. I'm a skinny guy.

[A]

You guys do.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah, 100%. 100%.

[E]

Like, it's like makeup for your face, dude.

[C]

If I go baby face, all of a sudden, it's like, micah has a double chin to chin.

[A]

Maybe. Mike never did lose the weight from the college. He just grew a beard. Oh, man.

[C]

I just hit it, like, dude, yeah, I'd love to. I will one day. I don't know.

[A]

I have a double chin.

[C]

I'm like, dude, I'll do it for a video.

[A]

And I think everyone has a double chin, though. You can't really get too caught up.

[C]

But it's just, like, about the ANK angle.

[A]

Yeah, exactly. You're gonna have a Double chin, you.

[C]

Know, and that's actually how I look at people. Only because I have one.

[D]

You focus on their.

[C]

But I go, but. But when they, like, tilt their head down and they have a double chin, I go, well, so do I. And that's as far as I think about it.

[D]

I don't.

[A]

But do you point it out to him? Hey, you got a double chin.

[C]

Just like.

[A]

I know you can't tell that I.

[C]

Have one because I can grow a.

[A]

Beard, but I have one too. You just can't see it like yours.

[C]

Funny. I'm like, so. I mean, I'd go as far to say as I'm scared to. To do it. I'm scared to shave my.

[A]

Do it, Mike.

[C]

Beard off.

[E]

Conquer your fears, buddy.

[C]

Next podcast.

[D]

I know how we're gonna wake Mike up the next time he's sleeping.

[E]

Oh, God, there's no way.

[D]

Straight for the chin with the manscape.

[C]

Yeah, go right here. Yeah.

[E]

I have this picture cat. I just found it.

[A]

I'm just laughing, looking at Evan's beard.

[C]

I don't know why I don't.

[D]

A beard I can't grow.

[C]

What is that?

[A]

Goatee?

[D]

I don't know what that.

[A]

What do you call that?

[D]

I don't call it nothing.

[A]

It's kind of like the Homer Simpson.

[D]

Oh, the whole.

[C]

The whole. Yeah, like, Homer Simpson is his old face.

[A]

No, no. I don't know, man. Like, it looks good, but, like, when I look at it and, like, think about it, it's really, like. It's like a. It's a cool style.

[D]

I don't know. You don't think you should do that? The way you said that. You don't think it's cool? It's cool.

[C]

Yeah. I'll start with the goatee. I've also never done that. I think maybe I'm just too scared to do anything.

[E]

You should.

[C]

I did a mustache. Well, the Turcot mustache went really well for me. Yeah.

[B]

Spicy.

[C]

Yeah, that was good.

[E]

There was a Snapchat filter that would take the beard off of your face. And I have a picture of Evan on that.

[C]

Oh, my gosh.

[A]

It's like you're 17, bro.

[C]

What is that?

[A]

Well, that's why I'm laughing.

[C]

It's.

[D]

I look like I just got out of rehab.

[A]

I feel like. I feel like your. Your facial hair, like, style is like a 40 year old, 45 year old.

[E]

My dad has.

[A]

Yeah, it's like, it's like in a. Like a 50 year old. Like, it's a.

[C]

It's an older gentleman's get that out of there.

[A]

That's why I was laughing like that.

[D]

You.

[A]

That's just the way. I don't know. It looks fine. It looks fine. Everyone thinks you're, like, 22.

[D]

It's like, purely the easiest low maintenance thing because, like, I don't like to shave. Whatever. I can't grow a beard. So it's like, hit the cheeks a couple times a week. Run this for a week or two.

[E]

A couple.

[D]

Hit it with the manscape. Like, it's just easy. Like, I don't know. Like, if I'm going to run a mustache, I'm going to have to be, like, shaving every day. Like, not trying to do that.

[E]

He's trying to hit the cheeks.

[D]

Hit the cheeks a couple times a week. Okay. Hit the cheeks.

[C]

What do we got here, man, you.

[A]

Look like a kid.

[E]

I'm sorry to do this to Ken. And I think. I think the beard turns into weight in the face.

[B]

That is.

[A]

You guys got to shave your beards.

[C]

Tough.

[D]

Something about us. The stonks hat.

[B]

It literally just took my. Like, my beard and then just, like, turned it cheeks.

[E]

I know. I bro. And granted, this is back when Ken was big. Ken, he has lost a lot of weight since then.

[A]

You guys need to all shave your beards. Isn't how the Am I the only one up here with it? Obviously, because I can't grow facial hair like you guys. But, I mean, it's kind of crazy.

[C]

Yeah, I know. You guys have looking for an excuse. I wasn't even trying to transition into that, but I will. I'll do it next.

[D]

I can't say full on.

[A]

You guys should.

[D]

Nothing.

[A]

I think I want it funny.

[B]

I kind of want to do just the mustache for a little bit.

[C]

Yeah, I do too.

[A]

But you might look older that way.

[C]

You know, that's fine.

[A]

Just the mustache might make you look more like.

[B]

I think it looks funny, you know.

[A]

For sure look funny. Like, you look good with a beard. I mean, all you guys look. Look good. I don't know. I feel like it might take some of your youth if you go full mustache.

[B]

That's why I don't.

[E]

Because you'd look like a predator.

[C]

You should do one of those.

[A]

You should do one of those mustaches where it's like, everything's shade, but it's just like that little, tiny.

[D]

Oh, you mean Hitler.

[B]

You mean a Hitler?

[E]

No, no. The thin line.

[D]

No, just a Frenchman.

[A]

Right here. Just right here. You know, I don't know what that.

[D]

No, I. I like the curl. You get a Little wax in there, curl it up. Little handlebar. Or is that handlebars, Ken?

[E]

I think you could grow one long enough to curl it like a pen.

[A]

With a freaking Hitler.

[D]

That's not handle. But handlebars is down, right? Yeah.

[E]

Handlebars is down.

[D]

Yeah. What's the curl? There's a word for.

[B]

For. It's just the hip. Hipster mustache. No, that's all it is.

[D]

No one wants to be a hipster.

[E]

My girlfriend really wants me to shave, but I'm afraid she'll leave me if I do.

[D]

Unbelievable.

[E]

Well, not all of us look like you, Evan.

[D]

I don't.

[B]

What.

[D]

What does that mean? I am not. You don't all have a beer belly and a little slight man boob or what?

[E]

No, I got that.

[D]

Well, then we're the same. Have.

[E]

Do you miss racing, dude?

[D]

Yeah, I do. Honestly, I do.

[E]

Really?

[D]

Yeah. I loved it. It was super fun. It was like motivational tool through the week to not get too drunk and try to eat healthy and just, like, be prepared to be at my best.

[A]

And you don't have that now.

[C]

And the actual race itself kept a guy in shape.

[D]

Yeah, no, I don't think I have much motivation to not be a pile of shit right now.

[A]

It's almost. Almost, like, reinforced to be a pile of shit.

[D]

Yeah, no, yeah, it's. It's darn near encouraged around these parts.

[C]

Dang, dude, I. I hate to hear it, but the. The lawn outside looks good. Ev keeps that mowed. Like, he's got to show up for a race every week.

[A]

He does, but I was gonna say.

[D]

Hell of a correlate. Yeah. I love it, but I don't get it.

[A]

Well, you will be racing soon.

[D]

What's this now?

[A]

You will be racing soon. As you saw Mike signed you up for Cletus's race.

[D]

I'm actually unbelievably pumped for that.

[A]

Yeah, that's gonna be great, dude. So I think you need to just go in there and that's gonna chaos back.

[D]

Yeah, like, no, I would never.

[A]

People out. Yeah, like how you drive in our area. Just do it there.

[C]

I don't think.

[B]

Just drive it like we bought it.

[A]

Drive that motherfucker to the wheels fall off.

[D]

No, I won't do anybody dirty. Yeah, that didn't do me dirty. Like, I'm not gonna go out there and make a fool of myself. Crash everyone out. I mean, it might happen on accident, but that is.

[A]

I think it's gonna.

[D]

It's definitely not the intentions. Like, I know this. This is no demo.

[B]

Derby.

[D]

And honestly, like, I'm taking some pride in. Like, I have never raced a car. Never anything. This is.

[C]

Yeah, like, you want to do good time?

[D]

I would love to go out there and do good, like, just for myself. Like, just be like, I've never done it and I did good.

[C]

Yeah, bro.

[A]

I was gonna be like real NASCAR drivers.

[C]

Oh, yeah, I was.

[A]

I was stoked, dude. That's such a crazy lineup. Like, they got NASCAR racers and then grave digging people who have never raced a car in their life that are just YouTubers.

[C]

No, dude, I love it, dude. Cletus text me. Before I even knew is him, he goes, yo, this is Cletus. And I go, McFarlane. Yes. I go, there's only one Cletus I could possibly think, you know, that would be texting me. And he goes, yep, wondering if you guys are interested in the Bristol race. And then I'm just like, finally, like. Like, I was so stoked. Like, you know, we got the invite from Haley, but that was. That was through Haley and I was just like. I just felt like a. Just like we made it in a certain instance. Evan didn't know that he was driving in this until the driver's list came out publicly.

[D]

Well, no, no. Well, kind of. But I got a message from Cletus.

[C]

Okay.

[D]

That. Of saying, what number do I want on my car?

[A]

Like, what texted you or what?

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

You're like, what texted? Yeah, yeah.

[D]

Apparently dude might have tried to call, but I don't get calls. So.

[C]

Yeah, he just must run his whole biz off his phone, which is impressive. But. Yeah. So Evan's signed up and I was like, well, of course Evan has to do it because, like, after the Miata stuff and this and that, like, you're.

[E]

You're.

[A]

That's true.

[C]

You're a driver. Like, so, like, yeah, let's just go out there and I think it's in.

[E]

One of the first videos when you really started being here all spring, we said that you were an awful driver.

[D]

Yeah, C.J. said I was.

[A]

When we were at the shifter car track in Utah and you. Honestly, I don't know what you were doing. It was like you were purposely trying to.

[D]

I was. I was trying to. No, I was. I was trying to mix it up because, like, on the go kart track, like, at some point you're just kind of in no man's land. You either slow down and then get with a group of people and then mix it up. So, yeah, my lap times were horrible, but there was no fun for me. To just, like, go for the fastest time but be by myself. I would way rather be, like, bumping into people, trying to spin Ken out. So, I mean, that's my excuse for why. Why I did so bad. I was not saying I was good, but I. I definitely tried to go slow.

[A]

Fair dang.

[E]

I thought I had this memory of you in the driveway. You're trying to do, like, donuts or something.

[A]

Couldn't do donuts.

[E]

And we said that you were a bad. You're a bad wheelman.

[D]

No, that definitely happened, too. I think it was a light snow in the driveway, and I couldn't seem to figure out how to do a donut.

[E]

Yep. And now. You know what sold it? It. Exactly. You know what, Ev? You're a damn good driver. Now.

[D]

I'm. I'm stoked on this because it hurt when cj, you know, put a couple knives.

[A]

I was wrong. I was wrong.

[D]

You know?

[A]

You want to know something? I think that really makes you a better driver, or what makes you. Separates you from the pack is you're not afraid to hit the wall. I think that really is the difference. You're not afraid to go head. Just head on into the wall. So, like, you're. You're good to, like, risk it and, like, push it to that edge, really.

[E]

For the biscuit.

[C]

He.

[A]

Isn't that true, though? Like, I'd say, like, all of us could potentially really send it like that, But I think you have way less fear than the rest of us.

[D]

I think there might be some slight sense of, like, false security. Is that the right word? Being in a vehicle where it's, like, on a dirt bike, like, you tip over and it's just your body hitting the ground, but for some reason, when you're in, like.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

A box.

[D]

And luckily, I've never piled up. I mean, I guess I rolled the slingshot, but other than that, I've never really piled up a vehicle to, like, experience, like.

[A]

Oh, the jar of it.

[E]

Yeah.

[D]

Like, I get. Yeah. You hit a wall going real fast. Like, that's gonna be a bad news.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

And that might change my attitude, but hopefully not, though. Hopefully not.

[A]

I mean, we're gonna have to tune in.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

So that.

[C]

That goes down September 3rd.

[E]

Yep.

[C]

Labor Day. We'll film, put in a video. It's gonna be. That's gonna be a lot of fun. I'm glad that it. Tennessee seems fun. I'm very excited for you. We're gonna root you on. We're gonna film it. We're gonna cover it, and. Yeah, Try not to cause too much carnage. Try to win whatever you want.

[A]

Obviously, I caused carnage. I know that for a fact. Whether he's trying to or not might burn that place down. So tune in.

[D]

I mean, it's closed. Course, we can drink the Tonys, right?

[A]

Evan might get in a fist fight for cutting some guy off. It'll be like one of those races, you know, like nascar. When they get in fights after. Like, he'll, like, It'll take him about two minutes to get unbuckled from the car. He'll crawl out the freaking window, and then they'll just come up, start pushing each other.

[D]

I think the only way that would happen is if I was truly driving over my head. I'm, for some reason, doing very well, and someone spun me out. Like, I probably.

[A]

You'd go in and try to fight.

[D]

I might be.

[A]

I'm cool with you doing that.

[E]

If that happens, I don't need to be invited back. Yeah.

[D]

Like, if I feel like I got robbed, like, the guy couldn't pass me clean, and he spun me out. But that's so hypothetical. Like, I'm sure I'm gonna like that. That's crazy thinking that I'm gonna be out front for some reason. That's not.

[A]

But if it does.

[D]

But if it did.

[A]

I mean, just whatever you're feeling in the moment, let her fly.

[E]

Don't.

[B]

With Evan, If. If you get first place, I think we should get a PJ to Vegas.

[D]

You heard it.

[C]

All right, all right, all right. And we'll see you guys next week with a shaven face and a double chin. Subscribe comment, and we'll see you.