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Welcome to the live big broadcast with Derek Greer. We believe this teaching from God's word will empower you to live a full, impactful life in Christ. Let's dig in.

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We're going to be in Samuel, chapter 25 and verse 1. Then Samuel died. Samuel was one of the nation's greatest spiritual leaders at that time. But as great as he was, the Bible actually says that none of Samuel's words ever fell to the ground. Only Jesus had a record like that. So Samuel was a great man, but as great as he was, he still died. You see, no one gets out of this life alive. But the sad thing is, some of us die in our 30s, but we're not buried until our 90s. My goal is to die young, but as late in life as possible. And the Israelites gathered together and they mourned and lamented for him and buried him at his home in Ramah. And with Moses, God allowed the people of Israel to mourn 30 days after he passed. So God allows room for our sorrows, but not for our sorrows to last forever. Yes, cry. Yes, feel the pain. But at some point, you gotta wash your face and move on. And then it said, and David arose. In the same verse, it's written that Samuel died, but it's also written that David arose. God's work may begin with one person, but it never ends with just one person. And we must learn to let. Sometimes people go. Seasons change. And, you know, some people may be with you for a lifetime, but some people are just with you for a season. And you got to learn to embrace the season that you're in in your life. So David arose, and he went down to the wilderness of Purim. Now, there was a man of Maon whose business was in Carmel, and the man was very, very rich. Now, wealth in those days was not measured by money per se as much as by livestock in those days. In fact, on my. My recent trip to Kenya, there was a Maasai pastor that was really doing a great job leading his congregation. But because he didn't own cattle, the people weren't respecting him and they wouldn't honor him as their pastor. So we had to buy him some cattle in order to keep the church together. So different cultures, you know, see things different ways. So here it is. This is a very, very wealthy man. It doesn't say he has a million dollars in the bank, but what it goes on to say is he had 3,000 sheep and 1,000 goats. Now, this was a massive amount of wealth in this time in history. He had enough to provide food, milk and wool clothing from the sheep for thousands of people for several months. But here's the deal. We need to learn from this man. Never be so poor that all you have is money. And this is the case of the man we're about to study today. And he was shearing his sheep in Carmel. Now, shearing. Well, sheep shearing time was. It was really harvest time for herders. It was a time of celebration, a time of communion here, time of dancing and laughter. And then it goes on and says, the name of this man was Nabal, which literally in the Hebrew means fool. Now, the deal is, as we go on, we're gonna discover he earned this name. He earned every bit of that reputation, and he's not about to disappoint. And the name of his wife was Abigail. This is important. Singles do not overly idealize and romanticize marriage or run into it too quickly because it could be better to be single and alone than to be a companion of a fool for life. And she was a woman of good understanding. She was discerning, she was intelligent, she was wise. You know, all marriages are not fair often because opposites attract. And then it continues, it says, and she was beautiful in appearance, so she was the whole package. Hips, lips, fingertips, and a brain. But the man was harsh, he was mean, he was hateful, he was angry. And then it goes on and said, and he was evil in his doings. His bitter, sarcastic, self serving spirit came out in every single thing that this man did. You see, we can change our location, we can change our circumstances, but our attitude still travels with us everywhere we go. And this was the challenge for Nabal. When David heard in the wilderness that Nabal was shearing his sheep again, it's a time of happiness, feasting and celebration, generosity. David sent 10 young men. And David said to the young men, go up to Carmel, go to Nabal and greet him in my name. And thus you shall say to him who lives in prosperity, shalom or peace to you. Shalom or peace to your house, and shalom or peace to all that you have. So David sent wishes of peace, wishes of blessing. This is champagne wishes and caviar dreams. I mean, he's really trying to show Nabal that he's of good will. And then he goes on and says, now, I have heard that you have shearers. Now, culturally speaking, we'll miss this because, you know, we're of a different age and a different time. But David should not have had to have asked him for generosity at this point. Because the ancient codes of this time, and actually they still exist in certain parts of the world today, required people to both feed and shelter strangers that happened to be in their area. So when we look at what we're reading here, we see that Nabal had already snubbed David, already slighted David. But we see something of David's character here because he remained humble enough still to ask. And then he even goes on to make a case. Let's keep reading here. Said you shepherds were with us. Now he's telling the young man what to say to the fool. Nabal, your shepherds were with us, and we didn't hurt them, nor was there anything missing from them all the while that you were in Carmel. So what David was asking for was not unreasonable. You know, it really, you know, it seems like he was asking for a handout. But this really made a whole lot of sense in the culture at the time, because Nabal's prosperity was due in part to. To David's men securing the area. So there were no nomads, you know, rushing in, stealing the sheep. Nobody died, nobody got hurt. And then David goes on, he said, ask your young men and they will tell you. So we see here that David even gave Nabal the benefit of the doubt. He's like, well, maybe your herders haven't told you. Maybe that's why you didn't invite me. I could have an attitude and everything, but I'm not. But we gotta learn to be a lot more like David. We often don't just jump to conclusions. We cannonball into the conclusion. You hear what I'm saying? But we gotta learn from David. Benefit of the doubt. It's like maybe folks didn't tell you, maybe you didn't know. Maybe that's why you didn't invite us. Therefore, let my young men find favor in your eyes. For we have come on a feast day, a celebration day again. David has 600 armed warriors, well trained, fierce warriors. Yet he still, in spite of the snub, in spite of the fact what culture dictated, he was still as polite as possible. And he even throws in a please, watch this. Please give whatever comes to your hand to your. He calls himself his servant and to your son, calls himself his son. David. You couldn't get any gentler, you couldn't get any kindly. You couldn't get any more polite. Skip to verse 10. But then the fool answered David's servants and said, who is David? You see, everybody doesn't understand Nice. And who is the son of Jesse? Now the whole country had sung, you know, Saul had killed his thousands and David his tens of thousands. I mean, he's an icon, if you will. I mean, he's a celebrated warrior. But Nabal acts like he didn't know who David was. And nothing grates on an eagle like little tiny things like this. And then he continued, he said, there are many servants nowadays who break away each from one's master. So Nabal is here trying to push David's buttons like a 13 year old with a Nintendo. And here he's calling him basically a runaway slave. And then he continues, remember, he's a fool. Shall I then take my bread and my water and my meat that I have killed for my shearers? Notice all the mice and the eyes and give it to men when I don't know where they're from. So David's young men turned on their heels and went back and they came and told David all these words. How many of y'all can say, uh, oh, yeah. Then David said to his men, every man gird on his sword. He was like, you want crazy Nabal? I'm about to show you crazy Nabal. So every man girded on his sword and David also his own. And about 400 men went with David. Forgive me. And 200 men stayed back with the supplies. And David was about to turn up. Actually, David was about to act like a fool himself. We're about to read that. But thank God for a good woman. Now, one of the young men told Abigail, Nabal's wife, saying, look, David just sent messengers from the wilderness to greet our stupid master, okay? So he said, master, our master there. And he reviled them. He made fun of them, he mocked them and insulted them. But here's the deal, Abigail. The men were not just good, they were very good to us. And we were not hurt, nor did we miss anything as long as we accompanied them when we were in the field. So what he was saying was, David's men conducted themselves with integrity and with honor. Nothing was missing. Nothing was broken. But some people will bite the hand that feeds them and kiss the boots that kick them. This is what we got with Nabal. But watch what he says. He says, abigail, they were a wall to us. They were our security. They were a defense for us and to us both by night and by day. All the time we were with them, keeping the sheep. So David was doing. And David's men only did the right thing. And he gets rewarded with insults. Watch. Verse 18. Then Abigail made haste. She knew that time was of the essence. She knew how men operated and how they were. And when it comes to dealing with interpersonal conflict, procrastination is like a credit card. It's fun until you get the bill. And when you put stuff off too long and all hell breaks loose and it's too late to fix it, you'll regret the fact that you slept on it. And she took 200 loaves of bread, two skins of wine, five sheep watch this, already dressed, meaning these sheep were already ready to go. Five seeds of roasted grain, 100 clusters of raisins, and 200 cakes of figs, and loaded them on donkeys. Now, the fact that she had this much to grab so quickly says a whole lot about how much Nabal had on hand. And it actually, it reveals to the reader how stingy Nabal was being, because all this stuff was on the surface, ready to go. And it wasn't because he was poor, it was because he was cheap. And she said to her servants, go on before me. See, I am coming after you. But she did not tell her husband, Nabal, ladies, guard against misunderstanding submission. Abigail honored her husband without losing her individuality or her common sense and brain. Verse 21. That was a place to say, hallelujah, ladies, let me know you're in the room. Now David had said, surely in vain. He's upset. His face is red. I protected all that this fellow has in this wilderness so that nothing was missed of all that belongs to him. So he recognized, listen, I protected you, guy. I didn't do any harm. I had enough men to take what I want, but I didn't do that. And he has. This is what fools do, by the way. And he has repaid me evil for good. And then David said, may God do so. So David starts swearing now to God and more also to the enemies of David, if I leave one male of all who belong to him. By morning light, do you notice that fools have a special way of making you feel like swearing? So he's swearing right now in an oath, and the worst is being brought out of him by this fool. Now, when Abigail arrived and saw David, the Bible says she dismounted quickly from the donkey and she fell on her face before David and bowed to the ground. So this woman is actually treating him like a king. Her husband treated him like he was a nobody from nowhere. But she bows, she prostrates, her face is on the ground. Then it says, so she fell at his feet and said, on me, O Lord. Now, in the next few verses, we're not going to read them all 10 times. She calls David either her lord or her master. And what we see here is a very, very important tool. She called David who she needed him to be, not necessarily what he looked like at the moment. And, ladies, you need to learn to call out of your man what sometimes is hidden in your man. You hear what I'm saying instead of what's on the surface. But watch what he said on me. Let this iniquity be. She was willing to accept responsibility for a fault that was not her own. This woman was really a true leader. And please let your maid servant. I mean, she speaks of herself in the most humble tones. Speak in your ears and hear the words of your. What, Maidservant. She was gentle, but she also knew how to assert herself. You can be assertive without being a man. Okay, how do I say that? I'm looking at this side of the room. You can say what you have to say without being manly. And say, now to this side. You can keep your femininity even as you address issues. And we see that Abigail was very comfortable in her skin. There's nothing like a confident woman. Then she says to David, please let my lord regard this scoundrel Nabal. And, ladies, sometimes you need to call it what it is. But she keeps appealing to the king in David instead of the fool that had girded his sword. Ladies, if you keep appealing to the devil in your man, don't be surprised if the devil keeps showing up. Pay attention to what I'm saying. Treat him like a dog. He's going to act like a dog. Somebody better say amen, because I know I'm preaching good right here. For as his name is, so is he. Full is his name, and folly is with him. And again, this goes on for six more verses. But what I want you to see, I'm going to just summarize here. Unconditional love doesn't mean you unconditionally approve of bad behavior. Submission is not the same as enablement and enabling. You need to tell him the truth if you're going to be a help and a benefit. Now watch. Now. She's about to teach you something. She said, now, therefore, my lord, this guy's about to do something foolish. In fact, he's about to admit it. So it's not just me taking license here. David's about to admit, I was about to mess up, but, Abigail, you saved me. And sometimes we need a woman in our lives to protect us from ourselves. She said, now therefore, what, my lord? She kept appealing to the king in David. David's Better angels. His higher self versus the fool in David. I know when I puff up, if my wife puffs up, I puff up further. I'm not gonna let her outdo my puff. You hear what I'm saying? I know some of us might be wired differently. Yeah. But my wife is wise. You see, a soft answer turns away wrath. So when I'm. She'll say something sweet, and I'll be like, oh, I'm such an idiot. Idiot. My constant stuff. But if you want to go tit for tat. You mean. You're just going to have to box like a man. With a man. See, I know. See, Mama didn't treat you right. She didn't train you right. You need to use what your mama gave you. Work the tools you have. Now, I do know some women will whip their husband. But in my situation, my wife, five foot. So she gotta use the tools God gave her. And when we're in a conflict, I don't want her to buck up like Johnny. Ladies, use your tools. Work with what you got. Don't argue with him like another man. See, I felt it again. I just. I can't move on. I keep feeling something in this room. Abigail was smart. The Bible says she was of good understanding, but she wasn't trying to be a man. Okay, I'm gonna say something gonna get you mad. In our culture today, there's this mindset that ladies. This is not in my notes, obviously. This is this concept that the highest thing a lady can be is like a man. What's wrong with you? You step down when you become like a guy. Okay, stay with me, stay with me, stay with me. So the Bible says this, that we're to honor our wives as the weaker vessel. Pay attention. It didn't say she weaker. Like I said, some of y'all will whip your husband. But to honor. As if she's the. As if you honor her like she's a delicate piece of glass. It doesn't mean she's delicate because women are many times stronger than men. But we're the. But if you want to be honored like you delicate, you might want to show some delicacy in your manner and the way you deal with stuff in the house. He said, now, therefore, my what, my Lord? She's appealing to the king and not the fool. She was like, david, I know you're strong, David. I see your muscles. I know you could take them, David. Well, baby, don't take this situation in your own hands. Leave it to God, David. I know you can, but don't do it, David. And sometimes guys need a woman in their life. Say, step back. Step down. Watch David's response. And David said to Abigail, blessed is the Lord God of Israel who sent you this day to meet me. Brothers, you need to recognize the help a good woman's trying to give you. Yeah, there you go. There you go. You see? Being wise is not the same as being whipped. You need to value your blessing. In Genesis, the Bible saw Adam. God saw Adam all by himself. One of the most dangerous things in the world is a man left to himself. Everything was good. But when Adam was alone, he said, it's not good that man shall be alone. I shall give you a helpmeet suitable for you. The woman came to help the man because men need help. And you need to help us the way we need the help. But watch. 33. And blessed is your advice. God didn't give you all that education just to be silent. You didn't learn all the lessons you learn in life to have no say. He blessed her for her advice. Guys, we need to be willing to accept some advice. And then he said, and blessed are you. Watch this. Watch this admission. Because you have kept me this day from coming to bloodshed and from avenging myself with my own hand. And the only reason this happened was because Abigail appealed to the king in David instead of provoking the fool in David. And when she appealed to the higher part, the better part, David lived up to the expectations and he turned back and did not do the thing he intended to do. Ladies, you have more influence than you ever realized. Verse 36. This might seem like the sad part, because you think that David and Abigail would have run off and lived happily ever after. But that's not what happened. Abigail was a good woman. Abigail went back to Nabal. Notice she remained faithful to her fool. He was a fool, but her fool. And there he was, holding a feast in his house, acting like a king, like the feast of a king. Which lets us know that the stinginess and the ungenerousness, if that's a word, was more a issue of the heart than a lack of resources. So it was. And I'm almost done in the morning, when the wine had gone from Nabal, the other verses say, basically, Nabal got drunk and his wife had told him all these things, that his heart died within him and he became like a stone. Is that what it says? You see, when you do right, even by the fools in your life, God will square things without you going to jail, without you getting arrested, without you Leaving the house in handcuffs. 38. Then it happened after about 10 days. Watch this. That the Lord. The Lord. The Lord, not Abigail. The Lord struck Nabal and he died. If you keep doing what's right, God will fight your battles. God will handle it his way. God knows how to reach a brother if he needs to reach a brother. But please don't mishear say. Well, Bishop taught me that. You know what? I need to go home and begin to pray. That joker. Now what you do pray is that the old man dies and the new man lives and. And he crucifies that lower part of him so he could walk in the spirit. But God knows how to handle your matters when you fully give it to God. She didn't have to run off with David and cheat with David because she felt somebody cared more than her husband. She went back to Nabal and God handled it his way. And the Lord struck Nabal and he what? Died. But when you read the Bible, after Nabal, after the fool died. David married Abigail because he knew a good thing when he saw it. And just because you're on your second marriage doesn't necessarily mean you any less than and any less desirable and all the rest. And brothers, just because she's on a second marriage doesn't necessarily mean David saw a good thing and he recognized it. And what I want to say to every man in this room, we need help and we need to recognize it when it comes. Give God a hallelujah and a hand clap. Say, I learned something in church today. I'm going to do better. I'm going to do better. I'm going to do better.