Podcast Summary: "Why Young Men Are LOST… Here’s How To Fix it (Biblically)"

Live Free with Josh Howerton — Lakepointe Church
Release Date: December 1, 2025

Overview

This episode tackles the real roots of why so many young men today are feeling lost, lonely, and spiritually unanchored. Pastor Josh Howerton, joined by Carlos Verazzo and Pastor Paul Cunningham, delves into biblical and cultural causes, deconstructs modern influences shaping young men—especially the rise of internet personalities like Nick Fuentes—and lays out practical, Christ-centered steps to forge meaningful relationships and godly masculinity.

Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Loneliness, Isolation, and the Biblical Case for Relationships

• Modern Isolation: Loneliness isn’t just about being physically alone; it’s about an individualistic posture that technology, social media, and culture foster—even within crowds.
  • "You can be in the same room as someone but still be alone..." – Paul Cunningham, [13:13]
• Community by Design: Christianity is fundamentally communal. The Lord's Prayer ("Our Father... give us our daily bread...") and the structure of New Testament churches point to faith practiced in relationship.
  • "You have to follow Jesus for yourself, but you cannot follow him by yourself." – Paul Cunningham, [15:44]
• Men and Isolation: The podcast audience skews male—a rarity for Christian media. Josh notes that men uniquely try to "Lone Ranger" life:
  • "The three most dangerous words in English language are, 'I got this.' You don't got this." – Josh Howerton, [17:18]

2. The Necessity of Spiritual Friendship: “Corner-Toters” and the King’s Table

• Spiritual Allies: Every man needs "corner-toters" – people who carry him to Christ when wounded by life or sin, inspired by the story of the paralytic’s friends in Mark 2.
  • "Jesus did not look at the faith of the dude on the mat. He looked at the faith of his friends..." – Josh Howerton, [19:25]
  • At least four such allies are encouraged.
• David’s Model: Drawing from King David, men need:
  • Joab: A peer, a fellow warrior.
  • Nathan: An elder, a rebuker and truth-teller.
  • Jonathan: The friend closer than a brother.
  • "Every man of God needs a King’s table." – Josh Howerton, [28:24]

3. Why Are Young Men Especially Vulnerable?

• Cultural Shifts:
  • The rise of smartphones (iPhone, 2007) and social media created a cultural shift—loneliness and depression spiked.
  • "Smartphone... before then, you really couldn't, like, you know, there wasn't enough to do to do this all day." – Josh Howerton, [28:55]
• Fatherlessness:
  • Absentee or disengaged fathers have led young men to find “digital dads” in algorithms and podcasters.
  • "When men are not getting discipled by fathers, they're going to get discipled by algorithms, bro." – Paul Cunningham, [35:54]
  • Example: Viral YouTube videos replacing practical fatherly instruction (e.g., “How to tie a tie”).

4. The Rise of Influencer-Prophets and Dangerous TikTok/YouTube Discipleship

• Podcasters > Pastors:
  • When churches avoid hard cultural topics, young men turn to podcast personalities (e.g., Nick Fuentes, Andrew Tate, Jordan Peterson) for truth and identity.
  • "If podcasters like [influencers] and your pastor disagree on a moral or theological issue, your default mode should be to side with your pastor." – Josh Howerton, [31:21]
  • "You're in a bad spot if... a podcaster or an influencer actually become[s] the functional shepherd in my life." – Josh Howerton, [31:37]

5. Forging, Not Finding, Men of Consequence

• Men of Impact are Made in Groups:
  • “Good men of God...are not found. They’re forged.” It's never accidental.
  • "You show me your group chat and I'll show you your future." – Josh Howerton, [22:05]
  • Navy SEAL analogy: True courage appears when men are committed in a brotherhood.

6. Practical Steps: How to Find and Build the Right Brotherhood

• Pursue Wisdom Aggressively:
  • Find someone who’s achieved in your area of struggle. Ask questions. Do what they say.
  • "Here's how you succeed if you're a young man. My dad taught me this: Find somebody that is better than you are at what you're doing...ask them millions of questions, and then you just do what they said." – Josh Howerton, [41:13]
• Initiate Community:
  • Look for spiritual health—find couples holding hands at church, seek out gray-haired saints.
  • Leverage church discipleship environments (e.g., “Rooted”).
  • "You don’t have everything you need to accomplish everything...in the Kingdom of God, but every time we're in that room, somebody in that room has everything you need and your job is to go find it." – Josh Howerton, [45:04]

7. Counter-Discipling the Nick Fuentes Phenomenon

• Who is Nick Fuentes?
  • Young, charismatic, polarizing internet political streamer, espousing “America First,” Catholicism, and controversial views; associated with explicit antisemitism, racism, and misogyny.
  • “He’s got a lot of clips and some people are like, 'Ah, but he’s half joking.' It’s like, well, only half.” – Josh Howerton, [53:03]
• Why Is He So Magnetic to Young Men?
  • Masculinity is demeaned in the culture—Fuentes offers a “bold, aggressive, I-don’t-care” attitude that feels like strength and authenticity.
  • "This is what happens when you spend an entire generation telling young white men that you're toxic, oppressive and racist. ... Eventually they go, 'okay, I'll just be that'." – Josh Howerton, [59:49]
  • “He correctly diagnoses parts of the wound, but he poisons the cure.” – Paul Cunningham, [71:51]
• Danger of Revisionist History:
  • Fuentes and imitators echo the same victim/villain logic and conspiracy-theory methodology as “woke” left-ism, just in opposite direction (e.g., making Jews the problem).
  • "They're running the exact same play, bro." – Paul Cunningham, [62:45]
  • "It has a little bit of BLM for white people vibes." – Josh Howerton, [63:04]
• Biblical Response:
  • Christians judge all movements by scripture, not group identity.
  • “We don’t do critical theory, we do Christian theology... I am a Christian first.” – Carlos Verazzo, [70:00]
  • “Test everything. Hold fast to what is good.” – [1 Thessalonians 5:21, cited by Carlos, 72:57]

8. Memorable Quotes & Moments

• "Your life is perfectly designed to give you the results you're experiencing." – Paul Cunningham, [13:13]
• "Don’t fight the devil in the dark. The darkness is his domain." – Josh Howerton, [47:39]
• "Show me your group chat and I'll show you your future." – Josh Howerton, [22:05]
• "Good men of God...are not found. They’re forged." – Josh Howerton, [22:35]
• "He correctly diagnoses parts of the wound, but he poisons the cure." – Paul Cunningham, [71:51]
• Nick Fuentes clip on “finding a 16-year-old wife”:
  • "I got to find my 16-year-old wife, bro. Probably when I turn 30 or something." – Nick Fuentes, quoted [73:50]
  • Josh: "If you are a young man that wants to live a life of consequence for the glory of God, run as far as you can, as fast as you can from a man like that." – [74:48]

Timestamps for Important Segments

• [12:47] — Why men need “corner-toters” (real spiritual friends)
• [28:42] — 2007: iPhone/social media and the spike in loneliness
• [31:21] — Podcasters vs. Pastors: Who is your real shepherd?
• [35:54] — Fatherlessness: When fathers don’t disciple, algorithms will
• [41:13] — Pursuing wisdom and practical steps for young men
• [49:43] — Who is Nick Fuentes and why discuss him?
• [53:03] — The roots of Fuentes’s ideology
• [62:45] — “Woke right” — why Fuentes mimics the woke left’s playbook
• [70:00] — Filtering movements through scripture, not identity politics
• [73:50] — Fuentes’s clip on marrying a 16-year-old; direct repudiation
• [74:48] — Final advice: chase role models whose families and lives honor God

Actionable Takeaways

• Initiate biblical friendship: Don’t wait for friends to find you. Get into a men’s group or “Rooted” at church. Pursue mentors with the life you want.
• Guard your influences: Don’t let TikTok, podcasts, algorithms, or fringe internet voices disciple you more than real, local, godly relationships.
• Evaluate all things by Christ and the community: If a voice contradicts what is clear in the Bible or what you see in the healthy patterns of Christian community—reject it.
• Men of consequence are made on purpose: Forge your brotherhood; don’t Lone Ranger it.

Summary for Listeners

If you’ve wondered why so many young men seem adrift today—or if you find yourself lonely, angry, or influenced by strong online personalities—this episode breaks it down with clarity, biblical conviction, and practical steps. Real, lasting masculine strength is never built alone, nor is it forged by following culture-war grifters online. Instead, it’s found in Christ-centered brotherhood, in local church, and seeking out older men who have already been where you want to go. Discipleship isn’t passive—go get it.

"You have to follow Jesus for yourself, but you cannot follow him by yourself."

To get the discipleship guide or join "Rooted," text the word “notes” or “Rooted” to 20411.