Mohamed El Shaki (35:01)
Livewire. How we doing, everyone? Good to see you. So happy to be here in Seattle, man. I love this city. I do travel a lot for comedy and I was just recently in Ohio. What a state. I'm so happy. Everyone there gets to vote. No notes on that from me. I don't know if you've heard of Ohio. J.D. vance is from there. You know, Jerry Vance, the authority. I don't know what he's doing. I know some of you are like, might know him from the movie. No, I am a book guy. But I get back to New York, I was so tired from traveling. I get into my building, I get into the elevator, and I got stuck on the third floor. I don't know if you've been stuck inside an elevator before or not, but I swear to God, it only takes one minute of you being stuck inside for you to be like, I don't even remember what outside looks like. I have no memories outside of here. I don't remember my mom's face or the concept of smell. Everything is foreign to me right now. But it comes with one good perk, which is you finally get to press on the emergency thing. You know what I'm talking about? Every time you walk inside an elevator, you make eye contact, and you're like, one day I'll hear the voice. And I finally got to press on it, and a voice came from the other side and said, what can we help you with today? The elevator. What did you think this was about? Like, what kind of help? Oh, what is the standard deduction these days? Do you know? And then they're like, okay, what seems to be the issue? It's not elevating. It's not elevating. It's not. It's not doing the thing from the name, and if you can have it do that, that would be fantastic. And then they were like, okay, how long have you been stuck there for? And that's a good one. I was not prepared. It's my first time. Because, let me ask you this. Is one minute considered an emergency? I had no. I have no idea. I was like, elevator people are about to make fun of me in the back. My ego got in the way. I was like, I can't say one minute. They'd be like, oh, no, it's an emergency. Hi. You coward. You eggshell of a man. So instead of saying, one minute, I just replied, and I said, two weeks. And they're like, excuse me, what did you just say? Like, two weeks? Never gotten help faster in my life, I'll tell you that. When I'm not traveling for comedy, I watch a lot of tv, and most of the TV I watch. I do watch a lot of nature documentaries. I love watching nature documentaries. Hell, yeah. We have nature here in the audience. I do think, though, we can all agree, no more documentaries about the bottom of the ocean. What goes down there is none of my business. It's against God. Every creature there looks like a first draft. You've seen them. You've seen them? You look at them and you're like. I feel like God made you with his non dominant hand. What's going on here? What happened? I feel like every time God messes up, he's like, can you put that stuff down there? And can you promise no one's gonna see it? What do you mean? They're diving. They're not supposed to see it. I'll drown them, I swear to God. I swear to me. So leave the bottom of the ocean alone. Don't venture there. Don't go there unless you're a billionaire. Have fun, my friend. No, truly, I don't think they should stop you, King. Have at it. Oxygen is a myth created by the poor. You don't need that. I also, I also. I got married at the beginning of this year, which was. Yeah, thank you. Thank you so much. I love being married. I love my wife so much. She's fantastic. And we travel a lot together. And every time we travel, she has to go hiking. And I know you freaks love that too. And me, myself, I'm more of a flat surface enthusiast. I don't think the surface should go like this like that. No, don't do that to me. And she sees that surface going up, and she's like, I must go. And she goes up and I'm like, come down here. What are you doing? Why are we so close to the sky? You know, we're not birds. And last year we went to Guatemala and she booked a hike. So excited about it. The whole time she was hyping up the hike. And obviously I wanted to, you know, just be fun and just enjoy the hike. So I was like, I'm not gonna ask any questions about it. I'm just gonna go ahead the day of the hike, just enjoy it as is, and that's it. Should have asked questions. Should have asked questions. A good question to ask about every hike is, how long are we hiking for? That's a good one. That's a good thing to know. That's a good thing to know before you commit. It was eight hours. It was eight hours. There is nothing I want to do. Nine to five. Mm. Mm. Absolutely not. Why are we hiking for eight hours? When we started the hike, it was summer, and then we went through so many different seasons by the time we got up, I did not like that. And like, we really, like. I was struggling during the hike, you know, I was really struggling. And we did the hike within a group. So, like, we had other international, you know, tourists with US Travelers. And I don't know if you have traveled internationally recently or not. I did, you know, stuff with other tourists. Too many Australians. I'm sorry, what's going on with Australians? They're always on vacation. They're always off. What is going on in Australia? How is the Australian economy even surviving? Like, their biggest export in Australia is Australians. That's it. And there was this Australian guy in front of us, and he looked back at us, and he was like, hey, guys, you gotta catch up. Don't tell me to catch up. You know, you come from a country where the time zone is yesterday. How about you catch up? How about that, huh? Welcome to the present for the first time. How is it. After that hike happened, instead of not going on hikes anymore, my wife would just not tell me if we're about to go on a hike. She would just surprise me with elevation. We would be walking around the city. And I'm like, where are we going? And she's like, dinner. I'm like, I love dinner. Like, how did you know I love dinner? It was one of my favorite things, dinner. And as we're walking, I'm like, man, why is dinner so far? Why? Dinner used to be so close back in the day. What happened to dinner? What happened to us as a country? And then she'd be like, hey, do you wanna go up there really quick? And I'm like, what's up there? I don't think dinner is up there. I've never seen dinner that high up. Every dinner I've had so far has been sea level. So what's up there? And then she was like, let's just go and see. And I'm like, I feel like, you know, just. Just tell me. Just tell me what's up there. Just get. Get. Get it out. What's. What's up there? You looked it up. Tell me. And then she was like, okay, the biggest cross in the country is up that.