Mentally ill with Brooke Averick

Summary

Long Winded with Gabby Windey: Episode Summary – "Mentally Ill with Brooke Averick"

Podcast Information:

• Title: Long Winded with Gabby Windey
• Host/Author: Dear Media
• Description: Gabby Windey delves deep into contemporary topics such as dating, sexuality, mental health, and pop culture with her guests, aiming to move past surface-level discussions to uncover their true selves. Drawing from her diverse background as an ICU nurse, NFL cheerleader, and The Bachelorette, Gabby offers unique perspectives infused with relatability, heart, and humor.
• Episode: Mentally Ill with Brooke Averick
• Release Date: January 16, 2025

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Introduction and Initial Banter

The episode kicks off with Gabby Windey and her guest, Brooke Averick, engaging in light-hearted conversation about pets and upcoming events. This casual exchange sets a comfortable tone for the deeper discussions to follow.

Brooke Averick [00:10]: "I know, but did you see that LA Times thing where it's like, tomorrow night there's gonna be something."

Brooke’s Podcasting Journey and Upcoming Book

Brooke introduces her podcast, "Brooke and Connor Make a Podcast," discussing her transition from podcasting to writing her first book, slated for release in 2026. The book centers on a protagonist battling intimacy anxiety, aiming to overcome personal barriers within thirty days.

Brooke Averick [05:06]: "So the book is basically... she's gonna get laid. And so the book is kind of just her trying to do that."

Navigating Dating and Intimacy Anxiety

The conversation delves into Brooke's struggles with dating, particularly her deep-seated anxiety stemming from traumatic experiences in her youth. She discusses her reliance on dating apps like Hinge and her contemplation of exploring same-sex relationships for comfort and ease.

Brooke Averick [06:29]: "I haven't been on a date probably since middle school."

Personal Mental Health Journeys

Brooke shares her extensive mental health journey, highlighting the onset of severe OCD and anxiety triggered by the events of 9/11 when she was five years old. She recounts how these struggles have persisted into adulthood, manifesting as intrusive thoughts and generalized anxiety.

Brooke Averick [18:49]: "I thought my thoughts were much more powerful... I thought I could start terrorist attacks in my head."

Medication and Coping Mechanisms

Both Gabby and Brooke discuss their experiences with various psychiatric medications, including Paxil, Cymbalta, Wellbutrin, Lamictal, and Gabapentin. They explore the benefits and side effects they've encountered, such as weight gain and anhedonia (a loss of pleasure). The conversation also touches on non-pharmacological coping mechanisms like cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), which Brooke finds ineffective due to deeply ingrained, irrational anxiety.

Brooke Averick [20:44]: "I'm on Cymbalta and Wellbutrin. A cocktail. I'm not sure. Still kind of working out..."

Gabby Windey [22:36]: "I've tried CBT, but it doesn't work for me. The anxiety might be so irrational..."

Substance Use and Its Effects

The discussion moves to coping mechanisms involving substances like alcohol and marijuana. Both admit to using these as attempts to manage their symptoms, though with mixed results. They acknowledge the complexities and potential downsides of these methods.

Gabby Windey [25:08]: "I feel like if you hit rock bottom, then you could be like, okay, nothing bad..."

Brooke Averick [24:46]: "I try. I'm not a very good drinker. But sometimes it hits in a great way..."

Humorous Personal Stories and Anecdotes

Adding levity, Gabby and Brooke share humorous childhood stories related to social anxiety and embarrassing moments, such as unfounded accusations about farts in class. These anecdotes serve to humanize their struggles and emphasize the importance of finding humor amidst challenges.

Brooke Averick [49:58]: "I was answering a question in computer class and in the middle, I farted, like really obviously and very loudly..."

Reading, Writing, and Recommendations

Both guests express their love for reading and writing, discussing fan fiction and favorite authors. Brooke recommends authors like Abby Jimenez for romantic comedies that incorporate mental health themes and mentions "Idlewild," a book inspired by her experiences at a Quaker school.

Brooke Averick [43:06]: "Abby Jimenez... she writes a lot of rom coms, and they have a lot of mental illness woven in."

Relationships and Friendships

The dynamic between Gabby and Brooke underscores their deep friendship and mutual support systems. They discuss maintaining relationships while grappling with mental illness, emphasizing open communication and understanding to navigate their respective challenges.

Brooke Averick [27:06]: "I'm always very communicative and being like, I'm depressed. I need this amount of time."

Transition to Advertisements

Midway through the transcript, the conversation shifts to advertisements for products like Lumi Deodorant, Aria, and others. These sections are integral to the episode but are treated separately to maintain focus on content.

Conclusion and Final Thoughts

As the episode nears its end, Gabby and Brooke reflect on the depth and breadth of their conversation, expressing a desire to continue their dialogue in future episodes. They emphasize the importance of community, open dialogue, and personal growth in managing mental health.

Brooke Averick [67:45]: "Thank you so much, Gabby. That was so fun."

Gabby Windey [67:47]: "Oh, my God. So fun."

Key Takeaways

• Mental Health is Multifaceted: Both Gabby and Brooke share their personal battles with mental illnesses, highlighting the complexity and individuality of each person's journey.

• Medication is Not One-Size-Fits-All: They discuss the varied effects of different medications, emphasizing the importance of personalized treatment plans.

• Humor as a Coping Mechanism: Sharing embarrassing yet humorous stories underscores the role of humor in managing and alleviating mental health struggles.

• Importance of Support Systems: Open communication with friends and family plays a crucial role in navigating mental health challenges.

• Creative Outlets are Vital: Writing, podcasting, and reading serve as therapeutic outlets for both guests, showcasing the importance of creative expression in mental health.

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This comprehensive summary captures the essence of the episode, providing valuable insights into Brooke Averick's experiences with mental health and her journey towards healing and self-discovery. For those interested in in-depth conversations about mental health, coping mechanisms, and personal growth, this episode serves as a meaningful listen.

Transcript

[Gabby]

The following podcast is a Dear Media production.

[Brooke]

I know, but did you see that LA Times thing where it's like, tomorrow night there's gonna be something.

[Gabby]

So tonight or tomorrow.

[Brooke]

I think it was today. Tuesday. Tuesday night.

[Gabby]

Okay.

[Brooke]

There's gonna be something with the winds.

[Gabby]

Santa Ana. Yeah.

[Brooke]

With the Santa Ana.

[Gabby]

Yeah. No, everyone's me. The. The amount of times I say wins. Can you talk into your mic?

[Brooke]

Hi. Can you hear me?

[Gabby]

I can.

[Brooke]

Okay, great.

[Gabby]

Really? Well, keep going.

[Brooke]

Okay. Okay. So Santa Anna wins Tuesday night.

[Gabby]

Yes. Okay, perfect.

[Brooke]

Do I. Do I need to put something in?

[Gabby]

No.

[Brooke]

Am I good?

[Gabby]

I just chose.

[Brooke]

Okay, great.

[Gabby]

Yeah. Are you good?

[Brooke]

I'm so good.

[Gabby]

Shall we?

[Brooke]

Yes.

[Gabby]

Here. Mommy. My dog is so fucking nuts, but he's locked in the room with Robbie right now.

[Brooke]

Do you have a dog and a cat?

[Gabby]

Yeah, they don't really with you.

[Brooke]

Okay, I was gonna ask.

[Gabby]

No, the cat, she's so sweet. You would love her. Maybe I'll like, pull her out because she's so tiny, so she looks like a kitten. And she's actually so lovable, social. We had to sneak her into the hotel.

[Brooke]

Oh, we snuck every. We had four cats.

[Gabby]

Four?

[Brooke]

Yeah. Mine, my friends, and then one of my friend had two, and both of the Airbnbs we stayed at.

[Gabby]

Oh, my God.

[Brooke]

Were no pets.

[Gabby]

Did they all get along?

[Brooke]

Recording. Ish.

[Gabby]

Yeah. Right.

[Brooke]

Like, as fast as they could.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

That's how she. She was loving. Which I could. I might have to, like, cut this whole thing because it was.

[Brooke]

I probably shouldn't say.

[Gabby]

I snuck my cast in the same. Everyone knows what he's saying. But, like, it didn't make me nervous, you know, sneaking her in. Normally I hate doing anything wrong because I'm, like, terrified of authority, but I'm like, we're. We're evacuees.

[Brooke]

I know. And, like, the alternative is leaving. Like, it's.

[Gabby]

It's just not an option. But she loved it because she was away from the dog. But when she's here, she just kind of stays in the cl. Closet. I know she'll come out at night sometimes.

[Brooke]

That's so sweet, though. I bet she likes it in there.

[Gabby]

I think so. Because, like, now this is my first time. I spent a lot of time with her, like, without the dog. And she'll go. She sleeps under the covers all day. I know, I know. I'm like, same. Okay, but let me introduce you. Brooke Everett.

[Brooke]

Yes.

[Gabby]

Right. Okay. You have two podcasts. Brooke and Connor make a podcast. Are these lights blinding?

[Brooke]

No. I'm so good.

[Gabby]

Okay, good Because I switched them around. Brooke and Connor make a podcast. And you're a obsessed with bro. Yeah.

[Brooke]

Obsessed. Died recently.

[Gabby]

Did it?

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

Oh, my God. I just listened to your recap. I was like, in stitches.

[Brooke]

Oh, my God. Which one?

[Gabby]

The last one you put out of, like. Oh, the best. Yes. It was such a good idea.

[Brooke]

The best stuff. Yeah. That was kind of like goodbye.

[Gabby]

But I had.

[Brooke]

It was a great run. Still there to listen to if anyone wants.

[Gabby]

Totally. Was it too much having two.

[Brooke]

I am writing a book now, so it's. It was a little bit too much just with the addition of that.

[Gabby]

Okay. Yeah. That's where, like, all your energy is going.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

Yes. Cause I feel like. Which I have so many questions. Questions. But you openly talk about your depression.

[Brooke]

Oh, God.

[Gabby]

Same. And you do it in such, like, a cool, like. I feel like you're so unbothered.

[Brooke]

Oh, thank you.

[Gabby]

In, like, the best way. Cause I feel like when we first started talking about mental health, it was, like, preachy. Whatever, you can do this. But now it's like, it's fine to be depressed. We're all depressed. Yeah.

[Brooke]

We totally all are. In different ways.

[Gabby]

Yeah. And like, a bit like. You love to read.

[Brooke]

I love to read. I'm depressed.

[Gabby]

Yeah. But you're hilarious. Yeah.

[Brooke]

These are two big things. Thank you.

[Gabby]

Wait, so you're writing another book in addition to the one that you just published?

[Brooke]

Okay, so the one I just announced.

[Gabby]

Okay.

[Brooke]

It's not published yet. It's just my first and only book that's coming out. And I don't know, but probably sometime in 2026.

[Gabby]

Okay.

[Brooke]

But it will be published. That's basically all that. All that I have.

[Gabby]

Yeah, totally. Because you have, like, deadlines.

[Brooke]

I have a deadline now. I have an editor. So it's like a real. A real book. Which is exciting.

[Gabby]

I saw just a snippet that's like. It's Gen Z. Bridget Jones. And I. Like, I'm in and out of reading whatever, but is the one book I've actually read twice. I've never read a book twice.

[Brooke]

No, I've never even read Bridget Jones. I probably shouldn't even say that. But I only watched the movies.

[Gabby]

I know. The movies are so good.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

And I've actually only watched the first one. I think you should watch those three. Okay.

[Gabby]

Right. And the first and the third are the best.

[Brooke]

First and the third. And then there's a new one.

[Gabby]

Is there.

[Brooke]

There's a new one, but they killed off.

[Gabby]

I don't. Bridget, you want me to tell you sure?

[Brooke]

They killed off Colin Firth.

[Gabby]

Which one was that?

[Brooke]

The husband or the one that she.

[Gabby]

That she's not you in Chance?

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

Oh, okay. Right. Like, what are we doing?

[Brooke]

I think, though, that that happened to the author.

[Gabby]

Okay.

[Brooke]

And so it's like, really having. So she's really writing her experience.

[Gabby]

Totally. It's like, cathartic. But we're so attached to him. It's like, maybe you should keep that for yourself.

[Brooke]

Maybe. It's kind of sad, but.

[Gabby]

Yeah. Where did you get, like, the inspo. What's your writing process?

[Brooke]

So the book is basically. It's about this girl who's turning 30, and she has, like, very severe intimacy anxiety.

[Gabby]

Okay.

[Brooke]

So she hasn't lost her virginity yet.

[Gabby]

Okay.

[Brooke]

And so she's 30 days away from turning 30, and she's kind of having, like, a breakdown. And so she vows that they need to get fast. In the next 30 days, she's gonna get laid. And so the book is kind of just her trying to do that.

[Gabby]

Oh, my God, I can't wait.

[Brooke]

Yeah, I'm excited. It's been so fun.

[Gabby]

Have you had this idea for a long time?

[Brooke]

Kind of. Just because personally I struggle so much with that kind of stuff. I was going to, like, dating and sex.

[Gabby]

Yeah. What is, like, intimacy anxiety?

[Brooke]

It's basically just like, in this book, she just, like, can't. She had kind of like a traumatic experience where she had a panic attack like, at a young age.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

With a boy. And then ever since then, just, like, hasn't been able to get close to someone again. Like a phobia kind of. So that is what that looks like in that book. Just, like, can't get close to anybody where there's, like, potential for intimacy.

[Gabby]

Yeah. But. Yeah. What's your mental illness like?

[Brooke]

Okay. I mean, I have tons of different ones.

[Gabby]

Okay.

[Brooke]

I would say my mental illness, similar to that. It's just like, the thought of, like, going on a date.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

Is, like. Feels like, almost impossible.

[Gabby]

Totally.

[Brooke]

Any sort of, like, real intimacy is so scary to me.

[Gabby]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Brooke]

But I. I'm. I'm really needing to push through that this year.

[Gabby]

Like, what happens when you're on the date? Does alcohol. Does anything help you push through?

[Brooke]

I haven't been on a date probably since middle school.

[Gabby]

Damn. You started early, though.

[Brooke]

Yeah, but that was just like a camp type of like.

[Gabby]

Okay. Yeah.

[Brooke]

You have no choice. A camp. I've never been on, like, a sit down, like, dinner date. And like, the longer that's gone on right up harder. I can't, like, I just would love to meet someone. Yeah, naturally.

[Gabby]

Totally.

[Brooke]

But not seeming like, so you like a possibility.

[Gabby]

So, like, the online aspect for you is now, like, complicating it, making it worse because you don't want to go eat with a stranger kind of.

[Brooke]

But I do feel like it's getting to the point where it's like, it doesn't matter that I don't want that. Like, I might just have to.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

But I'm on Hinge.

[Gabby]

Yeah. I wanted to watch that episode with Becca. I saw a clip where she was going through it. How's Hinge?

[Brooke]

I'm having a really hard time.

[Gabby]

I feel like. I know. I think just, like, everything dating apps will come back, but right now they're like, people are like, whatever. Dating apps are out. Just. Also, it's hard because you're straight.

[Brooke]

I know. It's so challenging. But.

[Gabby]

Yes. Like, the men these days, I don't like, obviously, it's like, are we waking up as women or are the men getting worse?

[Brooke]

I think all the good ones, like, if there are any, have to be taken because there's just such a higher demand.

[Gabby]

Right.

[Brooke]

Them.

[Gabby]

Yes.

[Brooke]

Especially, like, 27, 28 years old, I feel like.

[Gabby]

Totally. But why is there such a small pool of good ones?

[Brooke]

I don't.

[Gabby]

There's so many good women.

[Brooke]

I. I know, I know.

[Gabby]

That's like.

[Brooke]

I look at all my friends and we're all single, and I'm like, yeah, women are just, like, so amazing. How is it possible?

[Gabby]

Right? Like, at least you know you're in good company.

[Brooke]

Right.

[Gabby]

But also, I don't know. I'm like, if it is making anyone feel any better, I don't. Yeah, straight, but. Are you bisexual? Would you be interested? Do you want us to go through our lesbian friends? I, like, practice.

[Brooke]

If I, like. I don't know if it's, like, insensitive to say, like, I wish. Because I think that that would really.

[Gabby]

You can be insensitive.

[Brooke]

That would be so easier for me. I feel. I just feel so much more comfortable around women.

[Gabby]

Yes.

[Brooke]

And I've tried to kind of think that way, but it. I just. Now I don't think I'm gay.

[Gabby]

Yeah, totally. I know it happened and it happened. Yeah. And it is, like, it's hard meeting dudes in la. That's what people say.

[Brooke]

Yeah, I think so, too. And all of, like, my friends are gay, so there aren't any straights in anyone's Right.

[Gabby]

Circle. Yes.

[Brooke]

Even, like, all my friends have friends are gay, too. So it's like, Where? I don't know. Where any straight would be.

[Gabby]

No, that's how I am too. Like, my straight girlfriends. I'm like, I'm sorry.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

Like, I just don't know.

[Brooke]

How did you meet Robbie?

[Gabby]

We met outside of a bar.

[Brooke]

Outside of a bar?

[Gabby]

Yeah. But it was, like, a lesbian event, so already you're, like, being funneled into people who are, like, interested in dating. And, like, I was. So I went on one date with a girl before Robbie. I met her, like, on Raya, whatever, the dating app. I was like, this is weird, but I'm just gonna do it. I before had a glass of wine. I was like, I don't know what the I'm doing. This could blow up. But my friend was with me, and she was like, it's way easier being on a date with a woman because it feels just like your friends and stuff. So I was, like, so scared because I didn't know what I was gonna say. Like, you know, but. But it was just so easy.

[Brooke]

Wow.

[Gabby]

You know? Yeah. It felt nice. So it's like, I want you to experience a lesbian date with a man.

[Brooke]

I would love to experience a lesbian date with a man. Maybe I should just stand outside of the bar.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

Because it's not going well inside of them.

[Gabby]

Yeah. No. Yeah. To see who's coming in and out.

[Brooke]

I literally went to a bar the other day, and my therapist was like, maybe your body language is really closed off, and that's why it feels like no one's approaching you.

[Gabby]

Oh, my.

[Brooke]

She was like, I want you to, like, put your shoulders back and, like, you know. And so I literally, like. And I literally sat at an empty table, like, with, like, my shoulders back, trying to make eye contact with every single person. And I sat there for, like, two hours, and literally nothing.

[Gabby]

Well, I died because I was listening to your best of Brooke of 2024. In the first clip was, like, your fanfiction, which I don't know really what fan fiction is. I'd love to ask you, but it was like, so what is it? I'll ask you.

[Brooke]

So fan fiction is basically just like, if you're obsessed with any sort of, like, fandom. So, like, okay. I personally read a lot of Glee fanfiction because I loved Glee so much. So people write basically stories, long or short form, about these characters. Either, like, the character, like, with you. So that's called, like, Y. N. So your name. So it'd be like, oh, you're reading about this character and you in a relationship, or the character, like, with Another character in the same world.

[Gabby]

Okay. Okay. Because, like, I'm sure, like, everybody probably knows what fan fiction is. Like, I've heard it before, but I didn't actually know. What are you. On, like, forums?

[Brooke]

I was. When I was, like, in my, like, Glee era and, like, my One Direction era, I would read a lot of that kind of fan fiction.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

And the only fanfiction I ever wrote was Criminal Minds.

[Gabby]

Okay. So maybe that's what I'm thinking of.

[Brooke]

Yeah. You're probably thinking of the Criminal Minds.

[Gabby]

One where she ends up in.

[Brooke]

Yeah, exactly.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

Yes.

[Gabby]

But the one thing that really stuck with me was that she ended up in a psychiatric hospital because her therapist didn't understand her.

[Brooke]

Yes.

[Gabby]

And I'm like, same.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

I feel like it's so hard finding therapist that understands you. And then I'm questioning your therapist for giving your advice. I am.

[Brooke]

Well, I kind of lied a little bit about that. I didn't want people to know that I'm not in therapy right now because I broke up with my therapist a few years ago and have been really slow about getting back into therapy. So it was actually just my mom that told me that.

[Gabby]

Okay. Yeah. No. Okay. I take it all back. I think your mom is great and perfect. Do you watch Real Housewives?

[Brooke]

No, I don't.

[Gabby]

Okay, You. Well, there's this. I'm rewatching old seasons of New York, and one of, like, the OG Cast is, like, such a flirt. I'm like, you need to pull a Ramona singer.

[Brooke]

Okay.

[Gabby]

She would do that. But it's also, like, it's. I'm like, what's. Oh, what's your sign?

[Brooke]

Gemini.

[Gabby]

I was gonna guess that. Really? Yes. There, like, I guess. Which. I learned this from a past lives reader therapist, which I talked about, is a total scam. $500 down the drain. Yes, it was. But she was good with astrology. She's like, women, Geminis are genius. Robbie's mom. Yeah. Is a Gemini. She's so smart. You're so smart. That's all. That's all I know.

[Brooke]

Oh, thank you. What are you?

[Gabby]

I'm a Capricorn.

[Brooke]

And what is. What does that mean for you?

[Gabby]

I think, like, I don't want to say judgy. I'm a little closed off until you get to know me. So when you're talking about body language, I'm always like this.

[Brooke]

I feel like you're so open.

[Gabby]

It could be like, I'm an Aries rising. Do you do astrology?

[Brooke]

No, but I know that I'm a cancer.

[Gabby]

See, I was gonna. Those are my two for you. Just because you're like, you're really funny, you're smart, the Gemini. And I can also. You have emotional attachment to things. Me reading you, I've listened.

[Brooke]

I mean, it sounds good. The thing with astrology, though, is that everything I read could apply totally to anyone. I feel like not to, but I don't know.

[Gabby]

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[Brooke]

Okay, I have a ton. Basically I can. Let me just take you back.

[Gabby]

Yes, a while ago. Yeah.

[Brooke]

So I guess you Know, I guess it all started when I was young. I thought that. I guess I was 5 because it was 2001. I thought that I was responsible for 9, 11.

[Gabby]

Oh, my God.

[Brooke]

And that was kind of the beginning of, like, a very serious, like, ocd. Like, I thought my thoughts were much more powerful than they actually were. So, like, I thought that I could fully, like, start, like, full, like, terrorist attacks, like, in my head, like, if I had a negative thought thought, or if I thought, like, I hate my mom. I thought she was gonna die.

[Gabby]

Okay.

[Brooke]

And all that kind of stuff. And then that kind of, like, transition to, like. I got really scared of being sick because I thought that if I thought about being sick, then I wouldn't happen.

[Gabby]

So for, like, a self fulfilling, almost prophecy, I have, like, similar things. But when it starts young.

[Brooke]

When it starts young. Yeah, it was really hard because I, like, didn't. I barely left the house, like, when I was young. Like, I struggled in school because I always. I, like, carried around a trash can just because I was scared that I was gonna throw up. Just like.

[Gabby]

Oh, really?

[Brooke]

Like, isolating stuff.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

From a young age of, like, living with anxiety and that, like, very severe piece, like, got better. But obviously it's, like, carried over in different ways. Like, I still, like, really struggle with, like, intrusive thoughts and, like, like, not listening to my thoughts all the time.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

And then there's just, like, a general depression, of course, too, because it comes with the territory.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

Yes. Because I just get so depressed about the things that, like, I feel like I'm limiting myself on. And then I also just have such a generalized, like, anxiety, like, social anxiety.

[Gabby]

Same, obviously.

[Brooke]

Like, the dating stuff, I just am like. I think that's part of, like, the believing my thoughts too much because I just have been telling myself, like, I can't go on a date, and now I can't.

[Gabby]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It, like, becomes too real.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

Are you on medication?

[Brooke]

Yes.

[Gabby]

Okay. What kind of meds I'm on, I've.

[Brooke]

Been on so many different ones.

[Gabby]

Same.

[Brooke]

But right now I'm on Cymbalta.

[Gabby]

Okay.

[Brooke]

Wellbutrin.

[Gabby]

Okay. It's a good combo for you.

[Brooke]

A cocktail. I'm not sure. Still kind of working out, figuring out the kinks of that one.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

Because I'm not sure. Sorry if this is, like, so deep.

[Gabby]

No, please.

[Brooke]

I feel like I almost am, like, not feeling enough. I don't know if you've ever had that on antidepressants, but, like, there's some things I just wish I felt More.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

Lose or win. Win or whatever. Like, I also didn't want to feel for. So it's like.

[Gabby]

Right.

[Brooke]

It's always greener.

[Gabby]

Totally. One or the other. I've had that, like, same. I've tried them all. I've tried Zimbalta. It put me to sleep at work. Really. I was, like, falling asleep. And I was a nurse at the time. I'm like, this could not be normal. But also, I was so depressed as a nurse that now it's, like, getting out of one environment and going into another alleviated, like, some of it, but there's so same. There's so much deeper, like, underneath that. I'm probably always just gonna be depressed. But I've tried it all. SSRIs gave me that. The anhedonia.

[Brooke]

What's that?

[Gabby]

That's what you're describing.

[Brooke]

Oh, my God. I didn't know there was a word for it.

[Gabby]

Yeah, it's like a side effect from antidepressants where you just, like, you feel like you're not feeling enough. Yeah, I got that with ssri, so I haven't really been back to them. I've tried Lexapro. Made me way worse because I. I see. I don't even know because I feel like I can't, like, articulate what's going on to a therapist. I know.

[Brooke]

It's so hard.

[Gabby]

It's so hard. And everyone's different, but same. I have, like, intrusive thoughts. Like, I'm just. I'm a terrified of people. I'm like, what do you want from me? My mom never loved me. Like, please just find me a drug, you know?

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

Like, I'm sick of, like, I. Now I'm just even on the wave of, like, does. You know. Have you tried cbt, Cognitive behavioral therapy?

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

Like, does it work?

[Brooke]

It doesn't work for me. I know it works for a lot of people. But I think, like, I think I can speak for you too. Like, our anxiety might be so, like, irrational sometimes that it just. Like, I. I know how to, like, think rationally, and I've learned, like, the thoughts that I'm supposed to have, but it doesn't mean anything to me.

[Gabby]

Right. No saying.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

It's like, you can. Like, people are. Like, you can practice your way out of it.

[Brooke]

I really.

[Gabby]

I tr. I try same. Like, obviously, we've got our. You're so good at gaslighting yourself.

[Brooke]

I really do.

[Gabby]

Good. Because now you can't get out of it.

[Brooke]

Totally.

[Gabby]

But I'm on Lamictal now.

[Brooke]

I'VE heard of that one.

[Gabby]

Yeah. It's kind of like. I don't know if it's been gatekept or an underdog or like, it does make your immune system, I think, a little depressed. They get sick a lot more easier now. But it's the most stable I've felt. But it doesn't. So I'm on lamictal and gabapentin.

[Brooke]

Okay. I have some gabapentin on the side. Kind of like a la car.

[Gabby]

Yeah. Literally. That's it. And propranolol.

[Brooke]

Yeah, of course. That one too. Yes.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

But that one really puts me to sleep, which I don't think is normal.

[Gabby]

Yeah, No, I don't think so.

[Brooke]

Yeah. Yeah, I don't think so at all.

[Gabby]

No. Do you have, like, low blood pressure, which is a good.

[Brooke]

I don't know. But I honestly, I would not be surprised if I could just convince myself I'm tired and it's not the medicine.

[Gabby]

And it's so funny you say that, because also, I am so susceptible to placebo effect, which sometimes I love because I'm like, oh, my God, I feel better. But then afterwards I'm like, okay, I don't feel any different.

[Brooke]

Ye.

[Gabby]

So maybe. Yeah. But also, propanell can make me tired. It lowers your heart rate, so you don't get it. You're probably not getting enough blood flow to your brain.

[Brooke]

My psychiatrist was like, you should use this to go on a date, because that's supposed to, like, stop the physical symptoms and the shaking and the clammy hands. But I just convinced myself that I'm gonna get sick for. From the medicine. Like, instead, like, there's no.

[Gabby]

You'll just narcoleps right there.

[Brooke]

Yeah, I'll just narcolepse on site.

[Gabby]

Yeah. And then he could fall in love.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

But also, I know even with dating and stuff, it's like I' so nervous to the point where it's like, you drink too much and then you get there. You don't have any room to drink while you're there. But obviously this isn't going to help you.

[Brooke]

Maybe.

[Gabby]

But it's like they're just as nervous.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

Which it's like, you know.

[Brooke]

Yeah. But. Yeah.

[Gabby]

Do you drink? I'm like, really? For liquor on you?

[Brooke]

I try. I'm not a very good drinker.

[Gabby]

Okay.

[Brooke]

But, like, I'll. Sometimes it hits in a great way, and sometimes it's like I am falling. Like, I'm. I'm ubering home because I'm falling asleep. Like, I just never Know what's going to.

[Gabby]

Do you smoke weed?

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

Okay. Same. Yeah, that's what in Gabapentin, apparently my psychiatrist prescribed me, and then we had a checkup, like, two, three weeks after. I'm like, yeah, you know, I feel better. I'm not smoking weed as much. She's like, oh, it helps with weed dependency. So now I've overcome it.

[Brooke]

Oh, wow.

[Gabby]

Because I know that it's supposed to help, but I only like doing things on my own terms.

[Brooke]

So.

[Gabby]

No, I'm. I'm smoking weed every night now.

[Brooke]

Okay. Yeah, perfect.

[Gabby]

Yes.

[Brooke]

Are you, like, a social smoker?

[Gabby]

I don't like to smoke around people.

[Brooke]

I can't.

[Gabby]

Yeah. Yes, I can.

[Brooke]

With, like, a few friends that, you know, you feel safe around. And it's the same type of high.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

But I can't with people who aren't smoking.

[Gabby]

No.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

Because I'm not. Like, my brain. I just feel like I'm constantly being judged, and I'm like, it's not fun, but I know people who smoke around other people. I'm like, oh, you're so lucky.

[Brooke]

Yeah, I feel that way, too.

[Gabby]

I wish, like, I wish I could be giggly.

[Brooke]

I know I could never, like, smoke and go to a bar or go on a date.

[Gabby]

No, no. No way. You'd be way in your head.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

What else was I. I was just, like, listening. Oh, my God. Also. What? It's like. It's crazy. Well, I guess maybe we'll talk about mental illness. Sure. I don't want to talk about. Or I don't want to call it mental health anymore because it's, like, the absence of health for me.

[Brooke]

Yeah. But I love that you feel even.

[Gabby]

And maybe it's an outlet, but it's like listening to you on podcasts and stuff. You sound, like, so confident, and I love the way you storytell. That's.

[Brooke]

That's so sweet.

[Gabby]

Like, seriously, I don't feel that way.

[Brooke]

Inside, so it's nice to hear.

[Gabby]

Yeah, totally, but. And it is, like, it just goes to show that it's like, you know, it's not a reflection of what's on inside, because same people are like, how you so confident? I'm like, no, literally, I'm shaking like a leash.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

Like, I don't know what's going on.

[Brooke]

I'm always feeling sick, like, for one reason or another. Just, like, with anxiety. But, yes, it's nice to know that you can see that.

[Gabby]

No, not at all. And you have, like, a ton of friends.

[Brooke]

I do love my friends.

[Gabby]

Yeah. I feel like it's because depression can be isolating.

[Brooke]

That's so true. Like, it really can. But I'm always very like. I think what's helped is being very communicative and being like, I'm depressed. I need like this amount of time to not be around anyone. Yeah. And then we should be good in like two to three days. Yeah, two to three business days. Hopefully we'll be back.

[Gabby]

Back. Yeah.

[Brooke]

But also a lot of my friends are openly like depressed and dealing with stuff. So that's not nice, I guess.

[Gabby]

No, it's right. It's good to be able to talk about. I know. Because it's like if I. I mean, Robbie has her fair share of mental illness. She's ocd. And so I'm like, okay. I feel like I'm in good company, you know, and where if the other one, we kind of switch off our spirals, like if I'm spiraling bad, she's helped, like, she's able to help me and vice versa. But like some of my close friends, they, yeah, they just don't have a ton of mental illness. I' I can't relate.

[Brooke]

I really, like, I. I struggle to understand that. But I'm happy for them, of course.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

And engagement season is upon us. We just wrapped up the holidays. Now we're moving into Valentine's Day. There's love all around us. I mean, if I could pick one couple, maybe Timmy and Kylie. Fingers crossed. I know it's controversial, but we will be back in full blown wedding season before you know it. Summer is just around the corner. And you guys know Bird Gray is no stranger around here. They're actually your best friend if you're looking to get married or if you're going to be in a wedding or if you're going to be around a wedding. They've got the most stylish, affordable dresses that are perfect for any vibe. Birdie Gray believes that being in a wedding should look great without breaking the bank. Hallelujah. That's why all of their bridesmaids dresses start at just 99 and each one is more stunning than the next. They come in all of the colors, champagne, greens, pastels, pinks, purples, blues, you name it. They even have dresses for black tie weddings or they have more floral options for garden party vibes. Basically, you just do not have to look anywhere else. They also have a stunning collection of really budget, friendly little white dresses, all under 150. They have something for all bridal events, from engagement photos to the bachelorette and even the wedding after party party. My favorite are their cute little PJs for all your girls so you guys can match in the bridal suite or just lounge around in style. And best of all, Birdie Gray offers free fabric color swatches to nail the perfect bridesmaid dress look for the crew. So visit www.birdiegray.com now to get your first six swatches for free available for a limited time only. That's B I R D Y. Find the bridesmaid dresses perfect for you. You guys know a bloat? Woke up for no reason and feel like you can't breathe because all of the air feels like it's in your gut. But you didn't even get to enjoy a big pasta meal last night so there's no reasoning behind it. I never know what the cause is because it can happen at any point. It seems unrelated to my period and truly I am am over it. Well, DSO1 has helped extremely with maintaining a healthy gut and digestion, so look no further. It's easy to fit into my routine, which I like. I just have it after a cup of coffee and then I don't have to think about it again and I feel like DSO1 has significantly improved my digestion. I just feel more regular. I feel lighter, if you know what I mean. DSO1 is formulated with strains clinically validated to reduce abdominal bloating and intermittent constipation after two weeks. Speaking to me it also includes strains shown to support clearer, healthier looking skin in as little as 12 weeks. DSO1 is loved by their members. 92% of members have recommended DSO1 to a friend, friend or family member and it's shown to increase good gut bacteria by 4.6 times or over 400%. Those are impressive numbers. Get ahead of the new year with a routine that helps you now by going to seed.com gabby and use code 25GABBY to get 25 off your first month. That's 25 off your first month of seeds DS01 daily [e-mail] Gabby code 25 Gabby.

[C]

Earth to Bratman girl. You already know who it is. It is I singer, songwriter, actor, actress, athlete, activist and your newest favorite podcast host. I welcome you to the baddest radio hosted by yours truly, me Bretman Rock. Duh. Here I'll be talking about everything from funny personal stories stories to raw and unfiltered conversations. I'll be showing you how to live your best life unapologetically. Catch me on here every fourth day of the week, which are Thursdays. If you didn't know, you already know where to find a bad. Don't forget to follow rate. And, like, you can follow me at BretmanRock on everything and follow the podcast at the baddest radio on all social media, except for X. Cause who the hell uses X?

[Brooke]

Like.

[Gabby]

When did you start taking medication? Because it happened so young for you?

[Brooke]

When I was five.

[Gabby]

No way.

[Brooke]

Yeah, because I wasn't leaving the house, so it was kind of like a last resort option because I thought if I left the house, like, the towers would come down or, like, whatever. But.

[Gabby]

Did you live in New York?

[Brooke]

No, I lived in Philly, so it.

[Gabby]

Was, like, close enough.

[Brooke]

Close enough.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

But I went on Paxil. Have you ever been on Paxil?

[Gabby]

Yes.

[Brooke]

So I.

[Gabby]

What'd you think? Wait, at 5, though?

[Brooke]

At 5. And I feel like now psychiatrists, like, don't really prescribe it because it's like, there's so many side effects because I've.

[Gabby]

Tried it all, so naturally I've tried Paxil. Yes, but what was your experience?

[Brooke]

It is the only one that has ever, like, really worked.

[Gabby]

I feel the same, but it works way too well. So well. Okay, let's hear it.

[Brooke]

Well, I was just, like, literally had, like, no care in the world.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

In kindergarten, I was, like, getting in trouble for, like, pulling down my pants, which was, like, not me at all. Like, I was so shy and reserved. So that was obviously shocking to a lot of people, including my parents. So I went off of it pretty quickly. But it really, like, that was, like, the only time I remember in my life I didn't, like, get no shit about anything. And so in, like, 10th grade, my anxiety got really, really bad again, and I was, like, having a really hard time just, like, raising my hand in class.

[Gabby]

Class, that's me all the time. I never knew that that was an issue.

[Brooke]

Yeah. And then, like, we had to give, like, these presentations, and I was like, I literally. I can't stand in front of class. Like, there's no way.

[Gabby]

Absolutely not.

[Brooke]

And so my psychiatrist was like, well, do you want to try Paxil again, since you remember that being the only one working for you? And I was like, hell, yes, let's do it. And then I was totally fine. Like, had no problem talking and presenting him with whatever. But I gained about 30 pounds because all, like, I literally just wanted to sit and eat. And I stopped doing my homework because I was like, who gives a.

[Gabby]

Literally.

[Brooke]

No, I don't think I took my backpack out of the car.

[Gabby]

No, you started seeing the world clearly.

[Brooke]

Yeah. So it's just so tough because, like, that really is the only thing ever that has, like, gotten rid of my anxiety.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

But it works way too well, Right? What happened with you?

[Gabby]

Same. It's funny you say that, because I'm just like. Like, I don't. Now I'm seeing a psychiatrist that actually has, like, credentials. Like, before, it was like, I think some Internet. Like, she was just throwing the whole gamut at me, but I'm like, I don't. I wish I could. I don't have an addictive personality, so it's like. But sometimes I'm like. I feel like if I hit rock bottom, then I could be like, okay, nothing mad, you know? Like, I could. But I do. I like to try new things. I like to try new medications. So, like, I didn't stick with it enough, but same. All of a sudden, taking it. I would still have. I would have so much anxiety at work because I think part of it is because your job is so serious as a nurse. And I don't do well with power dynamics because my mom just scared the fuck out of me all the time. So, like, I was always having to, like, navigate around her for safety. So then it's like, okay, I feel like I have no power. So with doctors and nurses, there was always a power dynamic. I was always afraid I was doing something wrong. You just don't feel supported. And it's like. Like, whatever, sue me. Like, inherently kind of misogynistic. Like, just like. You know, they're all, like, old men. Right. They don't understand you. So anyway, so it wasn't totally helping with my anxiety, but the surge of confidence was, like, tangible.

[Brooke]

I know. I wish, like, they could make a version of that.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

And combine it with something. I don't know how the lab works or anything, but, like, there's got to.

[Gabby]

Be a way to tweak it if there's anyone listening. You never know who listens. I'm giving them ideas all the time. But you can take Lamictal with an ss because I think Paxil is technically an ssri, but it, like, put me to sleep. But also, I was a nurse working, like, 50 hours a week. I'm like, maybe that.

[Brooke]

Maybe that could have done it. Yeah.

[Gabby]

Yeah. But I just remember vividly. Like, you have such a good memory. But I have no memory, I think, because trauma. But, like, every. If I was a travel nurse at the time, so I was always confused in every room I walked into. Like. Like, you become so naturally funny. Which is like what we want to do. Yeah. You know? So I missed that part.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

Cuz I don't even know what happened, but I guess my guard was so down that I could finally for once say what I thought.

[Brooke]

I missed that too.

[Gabby]

But I know I'm like. I'm always one appointment away from asking for Paxil, which I have an appointment in two days and this. And I could do it. I could do something funny.

[Brooke]

I know I'm wondering, like. Because my psychiatrist had said something once about like trying just like a little tiny bit.

[Gabby]

Yeah. Like foaming at the mouth, like shaking. Yes.

[Brooke]

And I'm too scared because now like, the thought of like, gaining 30 pounds and like, I really not in the.

[Gabby]

Mood totally right now to do that. Yeah. The weight gain of like, SSRIs is just like, so like, it feels diabolical.

[Brooke]

Really. It really is. And that's why. Or something like that. So that's been helpful for me.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

In that regard. But have you ever been on Wellbutrin?

[Gabby]

Yeah. It made my anxiety worse.

[Brooke]

Okay. That happens with some people, I think, because it's like an upper.

[Gabby]

Yes. But you feel fine with it.

[Brooke]

I'm so low energy.

[Gabby]

Okay. That it helps.

[Brooke]

I, like, I needed a little bit of pep in my step, so that's been. That. That one has helped me.

[Gabby]

No, I wish I have. Like, in my one box, I gave away a ton of my boxes because Robbie moved in and I gave away. Or like, to her sister was going up. Robbie has a tiny house in Lake Arrowhead. So I brought all my keepsakes there. But what I kept was like, my phar. It's an assortment of old Wellbutrin. I've tried this crazy drug, Strattera.

[Brooke]

Oh, I've never even heard of that one.

[Gabby]

Oh, my God. It was. It took like. It is a. It's also an sn. S, N, R. Did you feel when you adjusted to it, was it, like, hard to.

[Brooke]

Which one?

[Gabby]

To Cymbalta as an snri. Did you feel like.

[Brooke]

I definitely felt less. Less tired.

[Gabby]

Okay. But that.

[Brooke]

I think only the biggest thing. The biggest difference, which is good for me.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

The. What's the name for not feeling things?

[Gabby]

Anhedonia.

[Brooke]

My anhedonia is new. Like, I didn't have that on the ssris.

[Gabby]

Yeah. Yeah. That is in Snris are. Because it's norepinephrine. Is the N. Right.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

Which is like. It feels. All the SNRIs I've been on have. I've had a crazy Adjustment, like, my head. But I love it. I love to feel anything different because I'm just not feeling. Feeling a lot, so.

[Brooke]

Interesting.

[Gabby]

Yeah. So I love, like, a medication adjustment. I love a medication change. That makes me just feel, like, kind of not even crazy, just different. But this Stratera is like, your. Because I've tried, obviously, like, Ritalin, Adderall, just, like, makes you have adhd. No, I. I like, do we believe in that still an adhd?

[Brooke]

I. Well, it's tough because, like, now, like, on Tick Tock, everyone has adhd and everyone has everything, too, which is really hard.

[Gabby]

We're up and weird.

[Brooke]

We're all up and weird. And I've, like, been having a hard time. Like, I know other people have mental illness. Of course. Not invalidating that at all.

[Gabby]

No. Yeah.

[Brooke]

But, like, when people are like, oh, I'm so ocd and people diagnosing themselves with.

[Gabby]

Right.

[Brooke]

Ocd, I, like, sometimes I'm like, Like, you have no idea. Like, yeah, it means. And that's been really hard recently, hearing people say that and then, like, having struggled, like, with that for so long.

[Gabby]

Yes.

[Brooke]

You know how real it is and.

[Gabby]

Just, like, how many layers. It's like you had, like, your init OCD about the Twin Towers and then you didn't leave the house, and then this leads to that and, like.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

It's not just like, you want to keep things clean.

[Brooke]

Right.

[Gabby]

You know? Yeah, but that's how. No, I don't have adhd, but it does. Like, I like to be concentrated because I feel like depression is just like, I get the. I have no interest in anything. Like, me having a hobby. No. Maybe now my. My one hobby is, like, housewives.

[Brooke]

I was going to ask. So many hobbies now.

[Gabby]

Yeah. I do like to read.

[Brooke]

Is that new?

[Gabby]

I heard you talking about Twilight, too, in your recap about how it's like, I'm not a Mormon, but I thought it was interesting. It's, like, based in Mormonism.

[Brooke]

Oh, yeah.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

There's a lot of people think that it's, like, just like, complete Mormon propaganda.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

The last one.

[Gabby]

Okay.

[Brooke]

Because it's like, very pro life, her keeping the baby even though it's going to kill her.

[Gabby]

Oh, fuck.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

I never got that far. I'm so. I'm like. I always just like, I can stop reading. Reading books. I don't. You know, I do halfway, and then I walk away forever.

[Brooke]

Oh, my God.

[Gabby]

I know. You could.

[Brooke]

I could never.

[Gabby]

Yes. Yeah.

[Brooke]

But I admire that because there are so many books that I'm like, this is a waste of time. I don't like it.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

And I'm torturing myself finishing it because I. I have to be able to log it on Goodreads to say that I finished the whole thing.

[Gabby]

Yes. No. There's, like, a guilt attached. I'm, like, a serial offender. I'm in between two books right now, but I am trying to get better at it. But I did. I feel like Twilight was one of my first reads, and I. And I. And I was like, oh, my God. Maybe this is why. Because I'm not, like, religious, but for some reason, I wanted to save myself, like, for. Of sex, for marriage. For no reason whatsoever. Yeah. And I'm like, maybe it's Twilight. Maybe it was the vampires.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

But now I'm getting, like, back into reading. I feel like, because I'm stable enough and, like, same now it's, like, I'm active on Goodreads.

[Brooke]

Really?

[Gabby]

I feel like. Yes. People are talking about it. It's nice to be in, like, Acotar. Yeah. Didn't finish. Finish.

[Brooke]

You didn't finish? How far did you get?

[Gabby]

I think. I think I got. I think I finished the second book. I don't know. See me, I cannot even remember. Oh, Gabby.

[Brooke]

Did you like them?

[Gabby]

I did. Yeah. But they're. I get so intimidated by, like, those big books.

[Brooke]

I'm like, let's get.

[Gabby]

Let's get it, you know, going already. Like, I just. Like a succinct book, which I was gonna ask you, like, who are your inspos. Like, who. What authors?

[Brooke]

Ooh, that's really, really good. Do you know, like, Abby Jimenez?

[Gabby]

No.

[Brooke]

Okay. She writes, like, a lot of rom coms, and they're very sweet.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

And they also have, like, a lot of mental. Mental illness slash mental health.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

Like, weaved in there, which is. I like and want to take inspiration from that. So her books are really good and just, like, feel good reads.

[Gabby]

Okay. Yeah. Love.

[Brooke]

Yeah, she's good. And then there's this book that I read recently that no one is talking about. It's called Idlewild.

[Gabby]

Oh, I feel like I've heard of it with a Y. Or maybe I'm thinking of the town Idle. I haven't heard of it.

[Brooke]

And it's about these middle schoolers that went to a Quaker school, which. I went to a Quaker school, too, and it's a Quaker school. Like, Quakerism is, like, a religion that's, like, very big in Pennsylvania, which is where I'm from.

[Gabby]

Okay. Yeah.

[Brooke]

It's just. It's Technically a branch of Christianity and I'm Jewish, but like, you can randomly be Quaker. Quaker and, and Jewish at the same time, I think.

[Gabby]

Okay. Because were your parents Quaker? No, they were just like, go to this.

[Brooke]

Or Jewish.

[Gabby]

Okay.

[Brooke]

But most. I would say, like 60% of the kids at my school were Jewish.

[Gabby]

Okay.

[Brooke]

Because it's just like such a liberal religion that like a lot of Jewish families gravitated towards it too. It's basically just like, in terms of religion, it's just like peace and love and like there's like God in everyone and we would have to sit in silence for like 30 minutes a week. And like, if you're like Buddhist. Yeah. It's like very like kind of Zen vibes.

[Gabby]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Brooke]

And it's like really big in a lot of like, early childhood.

[Gabby]

Okay.

[Brooke]

Because it's very like emotion based and like, very focused on like the individual kid. And so when I was a teacher, I was like. Because I taught preschool for two years before.

[Gabby]

Oh my God.

[Brooke]

Doing whatever it is that I do now. But that's what like the kind of school that I taught at and wanted to teach at because I really, really, like, I really did love it. But anyway, this book is about that kind of school and how it like gets so liberal to the point that it becomes like offensive.

[Gabby]

Right. Which is you go too far.

[Brooke]

You go way too far left.

[Gabby]

Kind of like what we're like, we're like experiencing very extremes right now, I feel.

[Brooke]

So it's kind of like about that and just like how like intense it is to have a crush and like fall in love in middle school and like how that affects you, like when you're in a adult. And it was so good.

[Gabby]

Right.

[Brooke]

And I am using like that one as like for inspiration in my own writing. And I feel like no one has read it. So that's my book recommendation.

[Gabby]

That's kind of a good thing. I feel that no one's read it.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

You can claim it as your own.

[Brooke]

I love being able to say, like, oh, this is one of my favorite books. And it's kind of niche and like, probably haven't heard of it.

[Gabby]

Oh my God, it's so cool, girl. Yes. And to have like a sick wreck.

[Brooke]

But I also want everybody, everyone to read it.

[Gabby]

Right.

[Brooke]

And I want the author blow up.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

I just have so many questions, I think, about Quaker school now. Like.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

Is the demand on the teachers more because you're catering to each student as an individual?

[Brooke]

That's a really good question, I think, honestly. Yeah. For like an early childhood. You are really, like, teaching to each kid. It's like, this kid learns this way. So we have to accommodate this kid by, like, having, like. I don't know if they're like, a visual learner. Like, you'll add, like, a visual aspect to whatever. So I think it is a little bit more work for the teacher. Just. You're right. Like teaching to the individual kid. But in high school, it's kind of just like, whatever.

[Gabby]

It's normal.

[Brooke]

It's just weird.

[Gabby]

What is it?

[Brooke]

Like, it almost felt like it was, like, not a real.

[Gabby]

Yeah, like, did. You're so smart.

[Brooke]

That's really sweet of you. I don't know. I don't feel that way a lot of the time, but it was almost like summer camp. Like, some of it was like, just like, we trust you. Do. Do what you want with this time. And it's like, I don't think you should.

[Gabby]

Right.

[Brooke]

Trust me.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

And it was very gay, too.

[Gabby]

Okay.

[Brooke]

And so that's the book. I was very gay.

[Gabby]

I love that.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

So did you. You had crushes in school?

[Brooke]

I had a crush on almost everyone.

[Gabby]

Yeah. When was your first kiss?

[Brooke]

That's. I think I was 18.

[Gabby]

Okay.

[Brooke]

So really, really light bloomer.

[Gabby]

But that's okay.

[Brooke]

Yeah. Oh, God. Totally.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

Yeah, totally. But back to the gay thing.

[Gabby]

Yeah, please. That's kind of nice.

[Brooke]

It was.

[Gabby]

Or. Or maybe it's like, it's so open that people just want to, like, try out. I'm wondering how many. If they're all actually gay.

[Brooke]

Well, it's a good. There were a lot of people who came out and then took it back just because they were, like, wanting to try it out. And then they were like, wait, this isn't for me. But we also had a curse in our cafeteria that was like, rainbow, and it was the coming out curtain, and you could come out as, like, whatever you wanted. So you could, like. It was like a metaphor, I guess, or symbol. You would walk through the curtain and then be like, I'm gay or I'm an ally, which was really interesting.

[Gabby]

Did you ever come out as anything?

[Brooke]

I came out as an ally.

[Gabby]

Okay. And then, like, what were the vibes? Were you, like, did you have a speech? Were you excited to do it? Were people watching?

[Brooke]

Well, some people would take a picture because there were signs that you could pick up, and it was like, I'm a lesbian. Or like, I'm gay. I'm an ally. And they would, like, just post it on Facebook.

[Gabby]

Okay. That's nice.

[Brooke]

Which is Interesting. And then most of the time people would come out at meeting for worship, which is that 30 minutes of silence.

[Gabby]

Okay.

[Brooke]

So most people would stand up and just be like, I'm gay. And then sit back down, like after.

[Gabby]

A couple minutes of like meditation, like they had an awakening or like at.

[Brooke]

Night was probably something they were sitting on and waiting to do for a while.

[Gabby]

Wow. Wow.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

I mean, it really is amazing.

[Brooke]

Yes.

[Gabby]

That there's like such a safe place for being gay.

[Brooke]

Yeah. Really? It was amazing. Truly. I loved. I loved it there.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

Wow.

[Gabby]

I can't believe it. It's like, obviously there's not more schools like that just because nobody's open minded enough.

[Brooke]

Right.

[Gabby]

But it really sounds like such a good experience.

[Brooke]

It really was such a good experience. And then there were of course, like a lot of times where it went like too far.

[Gabby]

One of my other favorite stories that I know about you, which I actually saw on TikTok. I'm. It wasn't. I think it was on Brooke and Connor. So it didn't make the obsessed, like, cut. But I wish you. I don't know if you used any of those clips, but I wish you would have snuck it in.

[Brooke]

Snuck, Sneak, sneak, sneak.

[Gabby]

Maybe. Honestly, when you were. I don't know if you know where I'm going.

[Brooke]

I don't. I'm so excited.

[Gabby]

When you were in third grade and you were in keyboard class.

[Brooke]

Oh, and I farted.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

Yeah, that one was tough. Yeah, that was a tough look. But think about it a lot.

[Gabby]

But also never admitted it. Like, you stood on your ground, you doubled down. Like, that's the confidence that I'm talking about. That's like, wow. If you could just feel that all the time. If all of us feel that all the time, we'd be cured of our mental illness.

[Brooke]

Truly. And just like, if you haven't heard that story.

[Gabby]

Yes, please.

[Brooke]

Basically I was like answering a question in computers class and in the middle of the question, I farted, like really obviously and very loudly. And it was like so obvious that it was me. But while I was talking, I was like, who was that?

[Gabby]

And everyone like, teacher pivot is genius.

[Brooke]

And then the teacher like obviously knows me because I can't even stress how.

[Gabby]

Like how loud it was.

[Brooke]

And she was like, it's okay. We, let's not worry about it. Like, let's move on. And the kids too were being so sweet for third graders. Like, someone just farted like they should be laughing. Everyone was being really chill. It was not a big deal. And I was like, no, I need to know who did that right now.

[Gabby]

And then what everyone do.

[Brooke]

And everyone was like, it was. And I was like, no, it wasn't. Like, I would tell you if it was me. And, like, it wasn't me. And I just think that someone should confess. And it went on for. I, like, wouldn't stop.

[Gabby]

I was like, no, it's so good. It is so good.

[Brooke]

But then I got what was coming to me later in life. In high school, it was my friend that farted during a math test. And it was me and her and her crush at a table. Oh, and she blended. And she. As the fart was coming out. The fart wasn't even all the way out. She was broke at the same time as the fart. Like, she didn't even let it come out.

[Gabby]

It's like, hello, admitting guilt. You smelt it. You Delta. It's not even out of your asshole yet.

[Brooke]

And I was like, there's literally no way I'm going down down for this. There's no.

[Gabby]

You didn't.

[Brooke]

But again, like, crush. She. I should. Looking back, I totally should have fallen.

[Gabby]

On this board for her.

[Brooke]

No, I feel bad.

[Gabby]

But so.

[Brooke]

But yeah.

[Gabby]

She admit it?

[Brooke]

No, she didn't admit it. But it was another situation where it was like, obviously that came from her because she said my name as was coming out of her butt.

[Gabby]

But I never think farting won't be funny.

[Brooke]

I agree.

[Gabby]

Like, it's hard being in my first lesbian relationship. Farts are so much different around here, really, I think, because there. There's two girls. So it's like. But I always, like, fart in front of my girlfriends and, like, vice versa. But I like, we. Where Robbie was really good about setting the tone early in the relationship. Like, this is not a friendship. This is romantic. And it's interesting and ironic and she'll kill me for. I'm sure I've said it before, but it's like she farts the most. And she doesn't hide it.

[Brooke]

Like, she doesn't hide it.

[Gabby]

No, not at all. She always acts surprised. Like, it's always a surprise to her, but it's like it's not a surprise anymore.

[Brooke]

Right?

[Gabby]

It's like you eat when we're in bed. Like, I can predict them, but any. But it's like, I do think it's funny.

[Brooke]

I do too.

[Gabby]

I was in nursing school, and we had an early microbiology. This is literally the only thing I remember. Probably because a fart is involved. And I. And I used to fart around all my boyfriends, just to watch them squirm. And looking back, it's like. I think it was me establishing my power.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

It was like, a power dynamic. I'm like, you're never gonna win. I will fart in front of you. And not.

[Brooke]

I can do what I want.

[Gabby]

Yes, totally. But, like, they would. One time, a boyfriend was like, when you fart, I look at you as more of a friend. They would take it so personal, and I would be in tears, laughing. I'm like, okay. But anyways, good for you. No, honestly, we're gonna get there. We're gonna. We have to come up with, like, a date plan.

[Brooke]

Yeah. I really, like. I'm not kidding about 20, 25.

[Gabby]

You just.

[Brooke]

I'm really not kidding.

[Gabby]

You just do it once. It's. It's an exposure thing. Totally. Yeah.

[Brooke]

That happened recently. Like, I'm not good with crap crowds. And I recently, like, got up in front of a crowd, even though it was, like, painful. And then I was like, oh, if. You just have to do it once.

[Gabby]

Right?

[Brooke]

And now I'm like, I could do it whenever, so I know I just have to do it once. It's just like, the first one that is like, kill me instead, please.

[Gabby]

Yeah, no, absolutely. But if you go in, like, a dark room, if. Even if you're kind of sleepy, you could take an extra gabapentin.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

Or a propanel. Yes. Yeah. Just to, like. Because it's like, it's an hour long in a dark room over, like, I feel we can do it.

[Brooke]

We can.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

But I just need to find someone totally. Even, like, if it's somebody unhinged that. It's just, like, practice. I can't even find someone unhinged that I would feel comfortable being, like, in a room with. They're all, like, horrifying.

[Gabby]

No, totally. And you're just not going to feel comfortable with somebody like that. I feel like on a dating app. But you have so many friends that they're all gay.

[Brooke]

They're all gay.

[Gabby]

Okay.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

Oh, we got to think. But my one friend, we were in 8am Microbiology. We had just come back from Christmas. Christmas break, so the whole auditorium had been, like, refurbished, so our seats were now leather. And she falls asleep naturally next to us, and we're like, oh, Megan's asleep again. And she farts. And it reverberates in the whole lecture, like, hall because the seats are leather, and it's like, a bunch of empty space. Everyone looks at her, and she wakes up, and she was like, what happened? She had no idea what happened. Or, like, and she, like, woke herself up to her own fart. You know, like one of those.

[Brooke]

It makes you wonder, like, how many times that you've woken up in the middle of the night. Like, was it because you farted?

[Gabby]

Right. You know, I'm sure, like, a lot of times.

[Brooke]

Yeah. Was she, like. Did you tell her that she farted?

[Gabby]

No, I don't think so. Maybe we did, but it was so, like, genuine and innocent and just the idea of somebody waking up to their own fart, like, it's like, you might as well have put, like, a speaker, like, a microphone by her ass.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

Oh, that's so good. But it was just so funny.

[Brooke]

Like, I mean, really farting will never not be funny.

[Gabby]

Will never not be funny. Yes. Let me. I feel like we think. Me, I do all of it.

[Brooke]

You do?

[Gabby]

Yeah. Well, I. I have, like, an editor, but I have to go through and, like, whatever, pick out the clips. Yeah.

[Brooke]

You're such a woman in stem.

[Gabby]

Oh, my God. I'm really not. Who's Andrew Barth?

[Brooke]

Oh, he. Have you seen the movie no Hard Feelings?

[Gabby]

No.

[Brooke]

Oh, he was in that movie with Jennifer Lawrence. It's such a good movie.

[Gabby]

Really? Is it?

[Brooke]

Go watch it.

[Gabby]

It's on Netflix.

[Brooke]

No, it came out a few years ago, and he was just such a star in that movie that I was like, who is this? I have to learn everything about him.

[Gabby]

Oh, my God. And he was on your.

[Brooke]

Kind of did a deep dive. Yeah, he was on Broadway, which I am also, like, a big theater girl. And then he came on obsessed, and he was like, my dream. Oh, my God, I love him. And he sings a song in no Hard Feelings that was like, my number, number one Spotify rap song. And it's so good.

[Gabby]

You have to watch it. I gotta look it up.

[Brooke]

You have to. It's brilliant.

[Gabby]

The clip of the interview was so good because you were like. I had. And I feel like you're so unapologetic.

[Brooke]

I was worried that I was being, like, too much of a fan girl on that one.

[Gabby]

It was. I don't. Even if you were. It was hilarious to listen to. So it's like, that's what you always have to, like, do it for the story.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

We first forget.

[Brooke]

Exactly.

[Gabby]

Really. It's for other people. But when you were like, I screen recorded your live.

[Brooke]

Yeah. It was actually after that where I was like, should you have said that? Maybe not.

[Gabby]

Maybe so nice about it.

[Brooke]

He is truly. He's the sweetest boy in the whole world.

[Gabby]

There was, like, one. There was, like, maybe a half a second of, like, deafening silence.

[Brooke]

Deafening, deafening.

[Gabby]

He was like, thank you so much.

[Brooke]

He's so sweet. And, like, truly didn't make me feel, like, too much, which is no good.

[Gabby]

No. And, like, that's what you get into. I mean, how did you. Did you, like, reach out to him Over.

[Brooke]

No, he reached out to me, and I. Which was, like, I was, like, beside myself because I had been just, like, obsessed, obsessing over that movie and him and the song. The song is. You know, the song Man Eater, not Nelly Tado.

[Gabby]

Okay.

[Brooke]

Oh, here she comes.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

He sings that, but at the piano. And, like, really slowly. And it's just so. It's all I listen to. And so I was probably listening to it when he DM'd me. And he was like, thank you so much for, like, all the nice things you've said about me, because I obviously wouldn't shut up about the movie and him. And he was like, I'd love to come on the podcast. And I was like, oh, my God.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

I didn't sleep for two weeks.

[Gabby]

Oh, my God. I love when stuff like that happens. It hasn't really happened to me yet. It will, but it's, like, amazing. Yesterday, I just saw this. Trisha Paytas started following me back. Yes. Which is huge. That's really big for me. Right. Because she's just such, like. And she's having, like, a moment. I feel like she's, like, a cultural icon. Is she still niche? I feel like.

[Brooke]

I don't know. She was on snl, right.

[Gabby]

She was literally on snl. But I'm like, do I screenshot it and post it on my story? My girlfriend was like, play it cool.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

I was like, I so hard to play cool.

[Brooke]

I only put that kind of stuff on Close Friends now because I don't want any. Anyone to. It's like, almost like, power dynamic, too. Because it's like, totally.

[Gabby]

You got to make.

[Brooke]

I want to have power. I want to have some power, too. Like, I don't want. You know.

[Gabby]

Yeah. Which is, like, such a big thing, I feel like, around here. Yeah. Because I always, like, I have an inferiority complex, but I'm working on my superiority complex.

[Brooke]

I want to do that, too.

[Gabby]

Yeah. It's like, how do you do it? I don't know.

[Brooke]

I don't know.

[Gabby]

Like, it's all, like, mind games.

[Brooke]

I really think so, too.

[Gabby]

Who's like, your dream man?

[Brooke]

My dream man? That's a good question. I probably have two. You know who Jonathan Groff is? Did you ever watch Glee?

[Gabby]

Never.

[Brooke]

Okay. So he's, like, kind of in that space. And another, like, Broadway.

[Gabby]

Okay.

[Brooke]

Broadway guy.

[Gabby]

Have you seen. Speaking of Broadway? It's the. What is it? Oh, Mary.

[Brooke]

No, I haven't seen it yet.

[Gabby]

Oh, my God.

[Brooke]

Have you.

[Gabby]

Yes, we saw. Because Robbie knows Cole is cola, so she was able to get us tickets because I think it's, like, I don't know, been sold out or whatever. I'm not. I was like. I don't have a lot of regrets, like, growing up, but one is that I. I was not in musical theater.

[Brooke]

It's never too late.

[Gabby]

Are you. You're. You're in musical theater, You.

[Brooke]

Right, Yeah, I did the musicals, but I wasn't, like, good or anything. I just loved.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

The space. The theater space.

[Gabby]

Totally. And I feel like there's, like, you know, the other kids are like, you. It is. It's kind of niche, but those people always come out so funny, I feel. And, like, a type of confidence.

[Brooke]

Well, it's like, a specific kind of person, too. Like, you don't usually. You don't have, like, the most popular kids in theater, so it's like, you kind of have to develop that sense of humor to get you by.

[Gabby]

Totally. Yeah. Because I feel like there was some, like, cool people in musical theater when I grew up, so I'm not familiar with Broadway at all. This was my first show ever, and it was incredible.

[Brooke]

I mean, I'm so jealous. That sounds. Yeah, it sounds so good. And that's such a good one to be able to see.

[Gabby]

Yes. I feel like an asshole kind of being like, this is my first and talking about it, like, without an appreciation, because I actually think. Think it's, like, a piece of history. I think it's, like, gonna go like will. I mean, even for people who love well. And I'm like, I've only ever seen this one, but it was so funny. It was so well done. The plot is amazing. He's amazing. I feel like it's just like a once in a lifetime thing.

[Brooke]

Nothing makes me happier than, like, somebody who, like, wasn't into musical theater. Like, seeing something that kind of, like, turns them.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

It really, like, brings me such joy. Like, I'm so happy you saw that.

[Gabby]

You're like, you do it. Oh, no. Who is it? Oh, he's gonna come around this way.

[Brooke]

Oh, perfect.

[Gabby]

Yeah. But. And Wicked. I saw you at the Wicked premiere, and you're a huge Wicked fan.

[Brooke]

I love Wicked.

[Gabby]

I've never Seen Wicked either. Robbie won't see.

[Brooke]

That's a really. Robbie won't see it.

[Gabby]

No. So I, like, I should go by myself.

[Brooke]

Yeah. It's a perfect, like, first show.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

Yeah. Even though it's technically your second, it's the perfect one to, like, really ease you into the. To the rest of them.

[Gabby]

Yes. In the movie.

[Brooke]

Did you see the movie?

[Gabby]

No. Oh.

[Brooke]

I don't know what to tell people. Like, haven't seen the show. Like, I don't know if it would be better to see the show first. Maybe you can just see the movie.

[Gabby]

Yeah. No, that's good advice.

[Brooke]

I mean, he's so good.

[Gabby]

Yeah. I want to see Ariana Grande. I heard her, like, comedic timing is so good. So she's amazing. So I just want to go for her. And I love seeing, like, anybody painted green.

[Brooke]

Yeah. Okay. Have you always loved that?

[Gabby]

I think so. I. You know. Guardians of the Galaxy.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

Okay.

[Gabby]

She was green. And then when I was on Dancing with the Stars, I wanted to be her. So then I was green.

[Brooke]

I forgot about that. And I remember that. Yeah.

[Gabby]

Yeah. Val was so pissed. My partner.

[Brooke]

Because we get green on him.

[Gabby]

No. But it was like, whatever. You know, they take dance so seriously. So, like, we were doing a hard dance. The quick step.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

And like. Which isn't that fun to do. It's like, if you're going to be green during a dance and throw away. I think it should be the quick step. Getting vague. Very specific. But he's like, we have to do the quick step again when you're not some green. I loved being a green.

[Brooke]

Yeah. That sounds really fun to be a green bed.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

I can't believe you watched.

[Brooke]

I.

[Gabby]

Thank you. Saw a clip.

[Brooke]

Well, not to be like. No, I didn't.

[Gabby]

No. Yes.

[Brooke]

I. But I saw it was all over. Tick tock. I feel.

[Gabby]

Yeah. Probably.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

Yeah. Because where did you, like. What's your origin story? Which is my. I love this question. I don't want to. I hope it's not, like, offensive. Because I love when people ask. Because it's like lore. You get to add to it.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

Because you've been around for, like, a long time.

[Brooke]

Like my Internet origin story and whatever.

[Gabby]

Origin.

[Brooke]

So I was teaching preschool.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

And school shut down because of COVID Oh.

[Gabby]

Oh, wow.

[Brooke]

And then I downloaded TikTok. I didn't have. I didn't have any. Had the app. And then I posted this video because I was just so bored about. I was reading. I wrote this letter to myself in middle school that like, showed up at my door when I graduated high school. And so I read that letter.

[Gabby]

Oh, wow.

[Brooke]

And just, like, filmed it and posted it because it was just, like, so ridiculous, the letter. And then that went viral. And so I started reading my, like, old diary and journal entries.

[Gabby]

Oh, my God.

[Brooke]

And then a few of those went viral. And then I had, like, two viral videos and I quit my job. I was like.

[Gabby]

Yes.

[Brooke]

Because I really was, like, so depressed as a teacher.

[Gabby]

Yeah. Too.

[Brooke]

And I feel like it's similar to being a nurse. Maybe you just don't have time for yourself at all. Like, your whole life is your job. You get home and you just want to go to sleep.

[Gabby]

No, that's exactly what it is. And teachers and nurses, I feel for the most, especially since they're wildly underpaid and the job is just, like, so stressful.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

It's like, at least if you're going to have a job like that, you should be paid well.

[Brooke]

Right.

[Gabby]

And it's like, I didn't realize how depressed I. I was as a nurse until I stopped completely. Yeah.

[Brooke]

I didn't realize, like, I couldn't even go to the bathroom, like, when I go.

[Gabby]

And then you have to go home, like, grade papers or, like, think of lesson plans.

[Brooke]

Right.

[Gabby]

It's just a lot.

[Brooke]

It was. It was a lot. And I. I loved the kids, but it was just, like, not the lifestyle that I. That was meant for me, I don't think.

[Gabby]

Yeah. But.

[Brooke]

Yeah. So then I quit my job after, like, two viral videos.

[Gabby]

As you should.

[Brooke]

Yeah. And then I got agents. And then I was like, do you think I need to move to la? And they were like, not at all. No.

[Gabby]

You can do.

[Brooke]

You can do whatever from. I was in Philly. You can do whatever in Philly. Then I was like, okay, I'll just move. Then I moved to la and then that was. That really made.

[Gabby]

Wow.

[Brooke]

Kept making videos and then started the podcast.

[Gabby]

How did you meet Connor?

[Brooke]

Through TikTok. Because we were like, us and like, a few other other people were kind of the first people to start, like, talking to the camera and just, like, doing those types of videos. Because it was very early on when people were just, like, kind of doing trends and dancing. Right. So we would always get tagged in each other's videos. And then we started following each other and messaging. And then when I moved to la, we lived together for the first few months.

[Gabby]

Oh, my God. Did you know each other before moving in? Oh, I guess we had met one.

[Brooke]

And then really hit it off and we were like, let's just lived together. And that lasted, like, three months.

[Gabby]

Wow.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

Oh, my God. You guys have been friends ever since.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

You have such good chemistry. I feel like it's so fun to watch you guys.

[Brooke]

Thank you.

[Gabby]

But you would never, like, date him.

[Brooke]

I truly, like. I hate it when girls are like, he's like my brother.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

But I really do. I really do feel that way. I think there's like, a very.

[Gabby]

No.

[Brooke]

Totally sibling connection.

[Gabby]

Yes.

[Brooke]

There. Because we also have nothing in common. Truly.

[Gabby]

Which I was also gonna say is like, you're, like, doing the Lord's work on Brooke and Connor. Because think you can. He's like. He obviously. He's hilarious. He's sweet.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

I've met him a couple times. He means. But it's like one of those where he just, like, doesn't know what's going on with women really well.

[Brooke]

It's sometimes.

[Gabby]

Yeah. But like, he's. He's always down to learn.

[Brooke]

He really is.

[Gabby]

Yes. Which is all we're asking for. So the two of you together is like, this is what everyone needs to be watching.

[Brooke]

Right.

[Gabby]

And he takes it.

[Brooke]

And he does. He takes. Takes it inside. And I think that's what makes it work. Is that because we have nothing in common? There's so much to be shared and explained.

[Gabby]

Yes.

[Brooke]

And it makes it funny when.

[Gabby]

So fun.

[Brooke]

We don't know what the other's talking about.

[Gabby]

Yeah.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

No, it's amazing.

[Brooke]

Yeah. Thank you.

[Gabby]

Yeah. Well, I think we're good.

[Brooke]

That flew by.

[Gabby]

Did it?

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

Oh, my God. Good. Yeah. I feel like we could talk forever.

[Brooke]

I would love to.

[Gabby]

Yes.

[Brooke]

Yeah.

[Gabby]

Where can we find you?

[Brooke]

Okay. I have a podcast called Where Should I Look?

[Gabby]

This or. Yes. It's like a Wide Lens.

[Brooke]

Okay. I have a podcast called Brooke and Connor Make a Podcast. And that's anywhere that you can get podcasts and follow me on Instagram if you want. That's Brooke Africa, and TikTok is Lady Efron.

[Gabby]

Love it. Thank you so much.

[Brooke]

Thank you so much, Gabby. That was so fun.

[Gabby]

Oh, my God. So fun. Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.