The Legend of Davy Crockett | Jan 29, 2026

Summary

Macrodosing: The Legend of Davy Crockett
Episode Date: January 29, 2026

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Episode Overview

In this episode, the Macrodosing crew, joined by recurring guest Francis, takes a deep dive into the myth and reality of American folk legend Davy Crockett. Blending their trademark banter with genuine curiosity, they explore Crockett's life, his political career, pop culture legacy, and the complicated narratives that surround the "King of the Wild Frontier." The episode also features lively tangents on golf fashion, NFL trivia, guns, comedy, and reality TV.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

Golf Fashion & Combinations (03:09–07:58)

• Arian's Impressive Wardrobe: Arian has a massive golf wardrobe—over 1.5 million possible outfit combinations.
• The group jokes about building a Cher-from-Clueless style computer program to help Arian pick outfits.
  • “I’ll be switching it up for the rest of my life.” —Arian (07:56)
• Conversation veers to classic 90s movies ("Clueless") and celebrity crushes (Alicia Silverstone).

Health & Aging Athletes (10:21–14:41)

• PFT seeks injury advice from Arian after repeated calf issues; Arian shares his own career injury story.
  • “All I do now is golf, drink water, kick it.” —Arian (12:18)
• They discuss transitioning out of high-impact sports in their 30s.

Comfort, Relationships & Kinks (14:22–17:18)

• Hilarious discussion on the art of a good butt rub and the proper attire for receiving one.
• The “Liberator” pillow, magazine ads, and sex furniture are mentioned, prompting group laughter.
• “We don’t kink shame on this podcast.” —Arian (14:52)

Davy Crockett: Myths, Song & Early Pop Culture (18:56–19:53)

• Mad Dog admits she knows little about Davy Crockett beyond the “Davy Crockett, King of the Wild Frontier” song.
• The crew teases out how certain historical figures are shaped largely by myth.

NFL/Actors College Trivia (20:00–25:55)

• Big T quizzes the group: Which five colleges claim a Super Bowl-winning QB and a Best Actor/Actress Oscar winner?
• Notable guesses: Cal (Gregory Peck), Stanford (Reese Witherspoon), UCLA (Helen Hunt & Nicolas Cage), Florida State (Faye Dunaway).
• “Our knowledge of where actors went to college is almost 100% based on College GameDay.” —PFT (24:40)

Rivalries, New York Sports Banter, and More (28:20–30:35)

• New York fandom splits (Mets/Jets/Islanders vs. Yankees/Giants/Rangers/Knicks) get dissected.
• “You can’t be a Jets and a Giants fan.” —PFT (28:23)

Manning Family Brand Speculation (31:36–33:26)

• The crew wonders why the Manning family opposed Eli playing for the Chargers, theorizing about intentional brand-building nationwide.
• “I think the Mannings are very intentional in every move they make.” —Big T (32:49)

Cleveland Browns Head Coach News (33:57–36:42)

• Mad Dog reacts in real-time to learning the Browns’ new head coach is Todd Monken.
  • “I do not know how to take this…I’m really shocked.” —Mad Dog (35:23)
  • PFT: “Fans that root for teams where he’s OC get very upset with him.”

LIV Golf Returns, Patrick Reed’s Reputation (38:41–43:37)

• News drops that Patrick Reed is returning to the PGA Tour; opinions are mixed.
  • “He’s cheats.” —Francis (40:18)
  • “Having villains is good for golf.” —PFT (42:03)
• Arian reveals he’s acquainted with Reed, noting his (literal) shortness.

Doomsday Clock Skepticism (43:52–46:08)

• The supposed seriousness of the "Doomsday Clock" is razzed.
  • “It sounds like a band.” —Francis (44:58)
  • “There’s no chance we’re closer to midnight now than during the Cuban Missile Crisis.” —PFT (45:11)

Language, Culture, and Comedy (46:17–54:49)

• Francis asks about the roots of “ax” vs. “ask” in AAVE; group muses on language evolution, the use of ‘Barstools’ for ‘Barstool’.
  • “It’s just culture.” —Arian (48:04)
• Discussion on offensive comedy: Is it still makeable in 2026?
  • “You can make anything funny if it’s done from the right perspective.” —PFT (59:34)

Davy Crockett Biography Deep Dive (79:06–105:01)

Early Life & Personality (79:10–83:30)

• Born to a poor family, didn’t go to school until 13.
• Ran away after beating up a bully; worked farm jobs and returned home unrecognized.
  • “He was starting to learn his letters when he was 13. Kind of crazy.” —PFT (80:51)
• Came to fame as Tennessee’s famed bear hunter; claimed 105 black bears in 7 months.

Political Career (86:45–96:12)

• Entered Congress representing western Tennessee.
• Built fame as a symbol of the “frontier” and became a tourist attraction at the Capitol.
• Outspoken opponent of Andrew Jackson’s Indian Removal Act—even at political cost.
  • “He was against the Indian Removal Act; called it a wicked, unjust measure.” —PFT (94:31)
• Saved President Jackson from an assassin’s double misfire, took down the assailant (95:07).

Pop Culture & Iconography (87:12–101:55)

• The classic coonskin cap was likely a theatrical embellishment, not an authentic Crockett trait until post-1835.
• Used public image (including the cap) for political advantage.
• TV and Disney (“Ballad of Davy Crockett”) cemented his folk legend status in the 1950s.
  • “They sold 5,000 coonskin caps every day.” —PFT (103:12)

Death and Legacy (98:07–105:01)

• Joined the Texas Revolution, died at the Alamo under legendary circumstances—whether fighting or captured is debated.
  • “You may all go to hell and I’ll go to Texas.” —Crockett’s most famous quote, recited by PFT (99:33)
• Walt Disney's adaptation and mid-century marketing created the “modern” Crockett legend.
• Ultimately, historians find Crockett more admirable and decent than most mythic heroes.

Davy Crockett’s Place in Modern Tennessee (105:10–108:00)

• Tennessee’s secondary mascot is modeled after Davy Crockett—coonskin cap, fringe, and all.
  • “He’s on some of the shirts—a dude with the little hat with the raccoon thing sticking out the back.” —Arian (104:59)
• Debates about Tennessee’s Mt. Rushmore: Dolly Parton, Jack Daniels, Davy Crockett, Oprah, and others.

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• “All I do now is golf, drink water, kick it.” —Arian, on his new routine post football (12:18)
• “If you can make it funny, you can make a joke about anything, but the more dangerous the topic, the funnier it needs to be.” —Francis, paraphrasing Bill Burr on modern comedy (59:42)
• “He was the Hitler of black bears.” —PFT, joking about Crockett’s bear-hunting exploits (82:02)
• “You may all go to hell and I’ll go to Texas.” —Arian, quoting Crockett's most famous line (99:33)
• “Having villains is good for golf.” —PFT on Patrick Reed's return (42:03)
• “King of the Dot is not Smack.” —Arian, explaining battle rap leagues (52:23)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

| Segment | Topic | Timestamp | |---------|-------|-----------| | Golf Fashion Banter & Combinations | [03:09–07:58] | | Injury Talk, Adjusting to Age | [10:21–14:41] | | Davy Crockett Song, Early Knowledge | [18:56–19:53] | | NFL/Actor College Trivia | [20:00–25:55] | | NY Sports Rivalries | [28:20–30:35] | | Manning Dynasty Speculation | [31:36–33:26] | | Browns Coach News (Monken) | [33:57–36:42] | | Patrick Reed/LIV Golf | [38:41–43:37] | | Doomsday Clock Skepticism | [43:52–46:08] | | Davy Crockett: Early Life | [79:10–83:30] | | Davy Crockett: Politics & Pop Culture | [86:45–101:55] | | Davy Crockett: Death & Modern Myth | [98:07–105:01] | | TN Mascots, State Icons | [105:10–108:00] |

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Episode Tone & Flow

The Macrodosing gang brings their blend of humor, nostalgia, and wide-ranging curiosity to the table, making even sidebars on shoes, dating shows, and iOS updates feel engaging. The historical deep dive is peppered with jokes, pop culture references, and honest uncertainty. The crew’s natural chemistry and willingness to chase tangents make this episode informative, unpredictable, and always entertaining.

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For First-time Listeners

Whether you know Davy Crockett as the “King of the Wild Frontier,” a political icon, or just a guy in a funny hat, the episode will fill in the gaps—debunking myths, celebrating legend, and reimagining an American folk hero with energy and irreverence. The rest of the show is a parade of real talk, sports lore, and the kind of brain-tickling banter Macrodosing does best.

Transcript

[A]

Hey, macrodosing listeners, you can find us every Tuesday and Thursday on Apple podcasts, Spotify or YouTube Prime. Members can listen ad free on Amazon Music.

[B]

The new era of UFC on Paramount continues. Live from Australia, featherweight champ Alexander Volkanovski.

[A]

He is an animal.

[B]

Defends his belt at home in an explosive rematch against Diego Lopez.

[C]

You gotta be Kenny.

[B]

And the always dangerous Dan Hooker throws down with powerhouse Ben Wasingtoni in a high action lightweight.

[A]

There's never been anything like this.

[B]

UFC 325, Saturday, January 31st, only on Paramount.

[A]

Tax act is here. Anytime you want to easily file your taxes.

[D]

Tax act is here for the early.

[A]

Birds who like to knock them out as soon as the season opens.

[D]

And for the procrastinators who like to wait until the very last minute. Tax act is also here for the middlers who file right in the middle of tax season. No one ever talks about the middlers.

[A]

But taxact sees you and Tax act respects you. Tax Act.

[C]

Let's get them over with.

[A]

What's he like?

[C]

He's kind of short. I don't know. What do you mean?

[A]

Is that what you say when people ask you about me? Like, he's kind of short?

[D]

I don't know.

[C]

He's really short. Like he's shorter than advertising.

[A]

That's just false.

[C]

Block got drunk again.

[A]

Ordered more Nike Golf. Love that.

[C]

I stopped doing it, man.

[D]

We gotta sit down one day and just count all the polos, quarter zips, pants, shorts you have. And how many combinations you getting?

[C]

It's getting ridiculous, bro. I ain't even gonna lie. Like, right now I have probably like. Should I go count real quick my shoes? It's like, it's probably like 30, 40 of just.

[D]

Just shoes.

[C]

Just go shoes.

[E]

Just golf shoes.

[C]

Just golf shoes. I'll be clean out there, though. Big D. That's.

[D]

I believe it. You never wear the same twice?

[C]

Nah, be clean out. That dog.

[E]

How many combinations was it like?

[D]

I mean, if he has 30 pairs of shoes.

[A]

Combination, combination.

[E]

There's like thousands. You did the math, I think.

[D]

I mean, if he's got 30 pairs of shoes, it's hundreds of thousands.

[C]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[D]

But you probably got. You probably got what, 30 polos?

[C]

I probably got more than that.

[D]

All right, but. So let's. Put this in.

[A]

What's your guess?

[D]

I mean, if he has 50 polos, 20 quarter zips or tops, hoodies, and then 20 pairs of pants.

[A]

Yep.

[D]

So that's 20 times 20 is 400. Times 50 is 20,000. Times 30 pairs of shoes is 600,000.

[F]

60,000. Right. 20,000 times 3.

[D]

30.

[F]

Oh, yeah. 600,000. Yeah.

[A]

That's crazy. That's crazy.

[C]

All right.

[A]

So while Arion's counting this episode of Macrodosing. Welcome back. By the way, it is Thursday. It's January 29th. It's brought to you by part of my cheesesteak. Ordering part of my cheesesteak for your game day meal or your late night eats is the best play call that you can make. And now you get free delivery by using code awl. Pick your favorite cheesesteak made with thin sliced steak, melted provolone, mouthwatering cheese sauce, caramelized onions on a toasted hoagie roll. Or you can order the popular big cat combo. Get your choice of cheesesteak, fries and a drink. Go to part of my cheesesteak.com order with code AWL. Get free delivery. That's part of my cheesesteak.com promo code AWL. Get free delivery on your pardon. My cheesesteak. Welcome back. It is Thursday, January 29th. It is macrodosing. We got Francis in the studio right now. Francis is here for the three on three basketball tournament we're. Which started last night. We can't talk about it, so no spoilers. But that calm, soothing honey drip voice, that nice baritone that you're about to hear, that is Francis.

[F]

That's so kind. In truth, I was actually going to say the sound of your voice had this lovely timber that I hadn't really heard next to me that. That before.

[A]

Does that count as a compliment? That seems like it was a. I was. I was going to say the same thing to you that you just said to me.

[F]

I'll be honest with you. If I had to guess, I probably thought of it before you did.

[A]

Okay. All right. So thank you for the compliment, Francis.

[F]

Thank you for being unoriginal is what I would say to you.

[D]

Okay. Intellectual property theft.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

On your part.

[A]

I'm. I'm biting his bits right now.

[C]

You?

[F]

Yeah, you. Yeah. You took the legs out from under me.

[A]

I did.

[F]

And I don't. It's no way to know if you knew or not.

[A]

I could read your mind. I could tell that you were about to compliment me. I said, if there's one thing about Francis I know is he's. He's always thinking of others. He's always trying to gas up people around them.

[F]

That's true. And I hadn't thought of that about you. So this is new.

[A]

Yeah. So there you go.

[F]

This is new.

[A]

There you go. Always thinking about others. Always thinking about who's on the first class list, who's not. How can we improve people's stature and improve their standing within the company?

[F]

You goddamn right.

[A]

Yeah. How is the first class? How is that?

[F]

Well, the only time I have it is if I get upgraded naturally. Mm. You know, and that happens most of the time because I have very high status.

[A]

Got a lot of points?

[F]

No, I just, it just diamond. So I get up. I. I got upgraded on the way here.

[A]

Okay. I like that. For a while, I didn't have any status whatsoever with the airlines because I didn't have a. I didn't have a.

[F]

Card, I didn't have a freak out.

[A]

Flyer number, any of that stuff. And then at one point, live event, Lisa got stressed out because I didn't have all these like, flying accounts with all the different airlines. She's like, I'm just gonna make you one so that you get the point. So thank you to Lisa. That was very kind of her to do that.

[F]

She's great at that sort of thing.

[A]

Yeah. So we got Arian, who just checked on his, his merch status. Aaron, how you looking? All right.

[C]

So we was talking about how. How many different combinations of golf I got. So hanging up. But I still got. I got some stuff in my laundry room still and some dirty stuff. Probably like three or four. Three or four fits worth. But hanging up. Polos, I got 54. Shoes, I got 37. I got two on the way. So let's call it 39.

[F]

Heavens.

[C]

And, and like the long sleeves, it's more, it's a, it's a, it's a thicker section than the polos. I was like, I. I don't want to count that. I heard.

[D]

So let's say you have another 50. 50 quarter zips.

[C]

50 quarter zips easily. Well, well, just like hoodies, long sleeve.

[D]

But that you could pair with a shirt. And then how many pairs of pants?

[C]

That's a little limited. I would say around 15 to 18.

[D]

Now call it 15.

[A]

Is there a difference between your golf pants and your normal nice pants?

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[D]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

So right now we're looking at 1.57 million different combinations that you can have.

[C]

Pretty set on look and fly.

[A]

What about belts and then hats, the hat.

[C]

Oh. See, that's why I don't really do too much. I either do white, black, gray, or blue. And I find that usually. Oh, I have a blue and brown one though. Like nice blue and brown. Like vintage, rustic looking one looks nice.

[D]

Now we're at 6 million hats.

[C]

That, that is a problem. Actually, that is a problem.

[D]

Call that another, what, 20?

[A]

No, sir, way more.

[D]

50.

[C]

That's a good 50 or 60. I got a lot of.

[D]

All right, so 300 million combinations you have.

[C]

Hey, I'll be switching it up for the rest of my life.

[A]

Big T, we got to get you a computer program. Like, I don't know if you've seen that movie Clueless, but when Cher gets ready in the morning, she's got her different things that she can. She can select from. You know what I'm talking about?

[F]

Of course I do. And it's so funny because the first thing that she chooses, the fact that she would have even thought that was a match, is outrageous.

[A]

Yes. Yeah. Mismatch. Yeah, no shit. It was like a plaid skirt.

[F]

Yeah. What works?

[A]

Solid pattern top.

[F]

Clearly a set.

[A]

Yeah.

[F]

That she bought together.

[A]

Yeah.

[F]

Share.

[A]

Took all the. All the realism out of that movie for me. That's a great film.

[C]

Alicia Silverstone on a date nap.

[A]

Did you really?

[C]

Yeah, we chopped it for a little bit.

[F]

She played Batgirl. Batwoman.

[A]

Batgirl. Batgirl, I think is. Yeah.

[F]

Because Batman and Robin.

[A]

It was Bat boy, and that was. What's his name? Christopher.

[F]

He played Robin. Christopher o'.

[A]

Donnell. Yeah. Chris o' Donnell played Robin. She was Batgirl.

[C]

That's right.

[A]

I used to have the biggest. Biggest crush on Alicia Silverstone. Same biggest.

[C]

Me, too.

[A]

So you guys chopped it up. Did you go on a date?

[C]

No, no, we didn't. We didn't get there for. She's like, overseas or something. It kind of just died, but lovely in the military. Yeah, she's on it, you know, she's on how?

[A]

Doing a tour.

[F]

That's a pivot.

[A]

Yeah, she was. Is she like an anti vaxxer now?

[C]

Is she really? We didn't get that far.

[A]

She might be. No, but she might be, too. I feel like she's gone.

[D]

Alicia Silverstone son has, quote, never had a drop of medicine.

[A]

Love that.

[D]

From 2014.

[A]

Love that. Good for him. Is he still with us?

[C]

Crazy, though.

[D]

Quote, he's never been sick. Sick. Just feeling a little off from time to time. And he's never had a drop of medicine.

[A]

Silverstone wrote that sounds like he's been.

[D]

Sick because his body is a super clean, healthy machine. It can defend itself against and flush out all the nasty stuff much more quickly than a baby whose diet isn't as kind. He actually never had to deal with the achy ears, gooey eyes, or rashy bottom that a lot of other babies experience.

[A]

You know, I. I wish my mom had half the Confidence in me that Alicia Silverstone has in her own boy.

[D]

Sounds like she had a super baby.

[A]

Yeah, like, my mom does like to brag, as moms do, but I don't think she's ever said like, my boy has never been sick because he has a super strong body. Also right now I'm, I'm going through it right now. My body's breaking down. Aryan, I need some advice from you.

[C]

Talk to me.

[A]

I've had some calf issues. Some calf issues for the last. I'd say it started feeling really tight last summer where I just wake up in the morning. Tight calves. Then I went for a run and felt like a twinge in my calf. And then I was like, okay, I gotta, I gotta chill out on this for a little bit. Fast forward to pop Punk in New York City back in December, mid December. I'm jumping around on stage. I felt and heard a pop in my leg and then had to kind of like walk it off a little bit after that. So I gave it some time, played basketball like a week ago. Everything was fine then. Not really a spoiler because I'm not going to be in the 3 on 3 tournament, but we're getting warmed up for it. And I was, I was dunking. I was about to dunk and so I pushed off my right leg and as I did that, felt another pop. This time hurt worse and it's lower down on my calf, which is concerning to me. So I'm not able to play in the tournament. I need to know what to do about this thing. I got to fix it somehow. Have you ever had that?

[C]

Actually, I have. I. I know what the, the pop you felt. I did that 2013. I missed all OTAs because I was taking a routine handoff. Went for a little, little cut like that. I thought it was Achilles at first, but it was just my, it was my calf. So it was like a really high grade calf pool. And actually still to this day have scar tissue in my calf from that. Yeah, but you. What you should do is stop trying to play basketball.

[A]

Okay, I can do that.

[C]

Yeah, Just do regular old people wash it like golf? Like that you stop playing basketball.

[A]

Treadmill?

[C]

No.

[F]

Arian, do you lift weights? No, not at all.

[C]

Days done, Friends?

[F]

Well, you don't have to squat, but what about, you know, free weights and pull ups and stuff like that?

[C]

No, no, sir. Those days are far behind me. All I do now is golf, drink water, kick it.

[A]

Yeah, it's nice. It's not. I mean, he's lifted enough weights for his Entire life.

[F]

You sound like Alicia Silverstone's son.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

I don't need no. No goddamn medicine out of here. I'm a healthy boy.

[F]

Just water and golf.

[C]

Water and golf, baby. I walked nine yesterday.

[A]

It might be. It might be the sunlight, too. I'm not getting a lot of sunlight here in Chicago in the wintertime. Maybe I need to start sunning my perennium every morning.

[C]

And you unmelanated people need sunlight as well. Get a little vitamin D in you.

[A]

You know, the other thing is, as we've mentioned, we work directly across the street from an electric substation. Kind of like the 49ers. Practice. Like it's right there. We do it. Yeah, it's right outside.

[D]

It's right outside the thing that's out there. Yeah, I guess. Yeah, I guess I've never given much thought to what that is.

[A]

I parked my car right in front of it yesterday, and then I. I walked into work. So I got a high dose of whatever that is, and then I. I started practicing. Baske, tried to dunk, and then pop. It's starting to add up, right?

[C]

To dunk is crazy.

[A]

I will. I was. Yeah. About to dunk.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

So, yeah, that's. It's something that I'm going through. But if you have any. Any advice for me, Ariana or Francis. You played.

[C]

That wasn't a joke. That was like, really, stop playing basketball.

[A]

I think I. I might be done playing basketball.

[C]

What do you get at, like. I had a. I had an epiphany. The same epiphany I was playing. Cause I used to play. We used to. We used to run at the gym like every Thursday, Friday, Zach, all. We used to run all the time. We used a group of us 30 plus year olds just running. There was a league. I got in the league. It was fun. Like, one day I pulled my groin and I. What the am I doing out here? Why am I out here? I don't need to be out here. This is strenuous.

[A]

It hurts.

[C]

I'm sore afterwards. For what?

[A]

No, One time we were talking to. To Jim Harbaugh and he said the human body craves contact. And I believe him. It craves contact. It's a very natural thing to crave contact.

[F]

I like contact, but more of like a caress.

[A]

Yeah. You like. Yeah, nice caring contact.

[F]

I like to snuggle.

[A]

Yeah.

[F]

That's all the contact. Maybe a back scratch. Not into that.

[C]

You ever had somebody rub your butt? Not the butthole. Not the butthole. But it's like a nice Caress over the butt.

[F]

I've only had someone rub the hole. Never. Never the cheek. I say, no way. I'm not into that.

[C]

We don't kink shame on this podcast. We don't kink shame.

[F]

You know what I mean? You better get way more specific with your region.

[A]

You get your butt rubbed, Aaron?

[C]

Yeah. It gives you a little butt rub. She do the back, and then she go to the butt. Nice little butt rub.

[A]

Are we talking, like, tickling, like, fingertips? Are we talking just like a.

[D]

Correct. Is this someone you're paying or is this.

[C]

Yeah, it's a. What?

[D]

Is this someone you pay to get a massage or this is just someone that's.

[C]

Come on, man. We're not all. I mean that. But.

[D]

Well, that's why I was. I was.

[A]

Like, just someone. You know, I signal.

[C]

It's a significant other. It's not just a random person. I know.

[D]

Hey, I. I understand, but I want.

[C]

To come over and rub butts.

[D]

No, I understand.

[C]

Yeah.

[F]

Yeah.

[C]

It's like, you know, a little shorty rubbing your back. You're watching tv. She rubbed her butt a little bit. It's a nice feeling.

[A]

So you're sitting there naked, watching television.

[C]

Don't even gotta be naked.

[A]

She rubs your butt through your pants, dude.

[C]

I mean, with jeans on. Laying down. That's weird. No.

[F]

What kind of pants?

[C]

Just, like, shorts. Like, regular, you know, chilling shorts. You be laying down with jeans on.

[A]

That's.

[F]

No. God, no. I just felt weird, you know, depending if it was like, a heavyweight khaki, that you wouldn't feel as much.

[C]

Right.

[A]

Yeah, no.

[C]

Like, you know, I don't take a.

[A]

Shower with a raincoat on.

[C]

I got my favorite Tennessee shorts in. I sleep in, like, every. Every night until I gotta wash it.

[D]

Love to hear that.

[F]

Your rub shorts?

[C]

Yeah. You call my rub shorts? Yeah.

[A]

So you put. You put your rub shorts on, then you lay face down on the couch, and then your girlfriend rubs your butt.

[D]

Like.

[C]

No, it's like.

[A]

You know how I'm just not understanding the physics of this?

[C]

You know how, like, you, like, prop yourself up on a bed and you got the pillow under the chin, and you start watching TV or doing whatever. You know what I mean? Laying down, reading, scrolling, whatever. She just rubbed her back, and then she just. She rubbed her butt.

[F]

I don't mean to stick on this, but you said pillow under the chin. What does that mean?

[D]

I know what he's talking about.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

You're laying on your stomach.

[F]

Mm.

[D]

And you're, like, on your phone or whatever, and you have the pillows under your head, but instead of the back of your head, you're just. You're resting on it forwards.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

You laying face down. And you like, kind of like squish the pillow, like a little. Little TP out of it, put it under there, prop your head up, you know. Oh, can't stay too long. It starts to get the neck a little bit, but.

[D]

Yep.

[F]

Right.

[D]

Got about 15 good minutes of that. And then you gotta flip over.

[C]

Gotta flip.

[F]

Yeah.

[A]

Do you guys remember getting ads for the Liberator? Does that name mean anything to you? The Liberator?

[D]

No.

[A]

No one.

[C]

Arian. No. It sounds woke.

[A]

No. Well, yeah, it does sound woke, actually, now that you mentioned it. But it was. It was in, like, magazine ads all the time back in the day, I think. I think it used to maybe even be in East Bay, but definitely in like, Maxim magazine. What were the other Maxim adjacent magazines? Is there one like thm?

[F]

Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

Is that the one?

[F]

Some three letter situation.

[A]

It was like soft. Softcore, Right. Porn. And these ads were for the Liberator. And it was just like a pillow, a modular pillow that you could add things onto, but it was just for sex. It was just for, like, different positions. And I remember looking at him being like, that's just a pillow. Like, people have pillows in their house. But it was. They did a smart move by being like, this is the pillow that you have sex on. Which means they could charge like 200 bucks for it.

[F]

Right.

[A]

It's a great deal. Just curious if anybody out there had Liberator.

[F]

I have never had sex with a pillow.

[A]

You mean using a pillow or.

[F]

I see now. No, never with a pillow. Not never using it. Yeah.

[A]

Couch cushion.

[F]

No, I never had. You know, we always use, like, performance fabrics. That would have been irritant.

[A]

Yeah.

[F]

Heavy.

[A]

You accidentally hit the zipper.

[F]

Yeah.

[A]

Go on the inside of the couch cushion.

[F]

They're great for buffing out stains, but not great for intercourse.

[A]

Yes. Anybody out there that's had the Liberator, let me know. We're going to talk about Davy Crockett in a little bit on macrodosing. And the myths around his life are. The truth surrounded his life, too. I just always knew him from the song Mad Dog. Did not know who Davy Crockett was. I. I knew she thought it was Davy Crocky.

[D]

Well, you literally did not know the name.

[E]

I know, like, he's a person that existed in the world, but I'm excited to learn more about him. Isn't that the point of this whole show?

[A]

Yes, it is. Yeah.

[E]

I'm excited to learn more.

[F]

The song Davey. Davy Crockett, King of the wild frontier.

[D]

Madeline didn't know the song.

[E]

I don't know.

[D]

But she claims to know all about Davy Crockett.

[E]

I don't claim she.

[D]

It's a very famous song.

[E]

I don't know that song. I don't know what he's. I know that's.

[C]

I've never heard of that song.

[E]

And I wasn't like a boy. I feel like that's a big boy scout thing and you wear the hat and the whole thing. It wasn't my thing. I'm excited to learn more. I'm excited to have you guys explain him to me. I'm. I don't know much.

[A]

Killed him a bar when he was only three.

[D]

True.

[A]

Yeah. All right. Before. Yep.

[D]

Oh, I had it before, but you go.

[A]

I was going to talk to. To Mad Dog about her coaching news.

[D]

I have a trivia question. Do you want it before or after?

[A]

Give me trivia.

[D]

Okay. You know, every year we do the schools that have had a Super bowl winning quarterback and a U.S. president.

[A]

Yes.

[D]

I have a list here of the five colleges that have a Super bowl winning quarterback and a best actor or actress Oscar winner.

[A]

Oh, okay.

[D]

Do you have any guesses how many schools are. There are five. And either USC or North Carolina will join the list this year.

[A]

Oh, I was going to say USC is my first guess.

[C]

Wait, what is the question? I don't.

[D]

Schools that have produced a Super bowl winning quarterback and a best actor or actress Oscar winner. I would have never known where any of these people went to college.

[A]

I'm going to guess Michigan.

[D]

Not on there.

[F]

Cal.

[D]

Cal is on there. Do you know the actor? I've never heard of this guy.

[F]

No.

[D]

Gregory Peck.

[F]

Oh, yeah, yeah. He played To Kill a Mockingbird.

[D]

Okay.

[F]

Played Atticus. Yeah.

[D]

I'm a go.

[C]

Boston College.

[D]

Not on here.

[A]

I don't know where a lot of these guys went to college. Like the.

[C]

Yeah, we were guessing. Have some fun.

[F]

We're just getting Stanford.

[D]

Stanford is on there. Jim Plunkett and John Elway. Do you know the actress?

[F]

Oh, this seems gettable. Is more modern.

[D]

Yeah.

[F]

It's not Natalie Portman, right? No, no.

[D]

But similar. Ish. I had no idea this person went to Stanford. Reese Witherspoon.

[F]

Oh.

[D]

And then we have Texas. Not on there.

[F]

She won for Walk the Line, right?

[D]

I have no idea.

[A]

I think. I think so. Yeah.

[F]

I'm going.

[C]

I will go with Tennessee.

[D]

No, not. Not big in the actor category. I believe there's A few.

[C]

There's a few of them.

[A]

There's a few of them.

[D]

There are a few. The. The Mr. Milchick from severance went to Tennessee. I think one of the Modern Family actors went to Tennessee.

[C]

I forget. There was one that was always on the sidelines when we played. I forget his name, though. I forget his name. It'll come to me. All right, let me go with.

[D]

I would say one of these you would have pegged as a place an actor would go. And the other two, you probably wouldn't.

[A]

Ucla.

[D]

That is correct. Troy Aikman. And there is an actor and an actress.

[A]

No idea.

[D]

Helen Hunt and Nicholas Cage.

[C]

Okay. Nicholas K. Okay.

[F]

Can we. I think naming the movies for which they won is also a nice extension.

[D]

I had no idea. Nicholas Cage won.

[F]

He won for leaving Las Vegas or something about Vegas. Right.

[A]

Yep. That'll be. Yeah.

[F]

Where he goes there to die.

[D]

You're asking the wrong guy.

[F]

And then Helen Hunt won for the one with Jack Nicklaus.

[A]

Something's Got to Give.

[F]

Jack Nicholson.

[D]

Nicholson.

[F]

Something's Got to Give.

[E]

That was.

[F]

Yes.

[E]

Diane Keaton, I think.

[F]

Oh, no, yeah, sorry, not that one where he's, like, a writer and Greg Kinnear is in it.

[A]

That Something's Got to Give.

[D]

Right.

[E]

Something Got to Get. Something's Got to Give is, in fact, with Diane Keaton.

[D]

I'm seeing. It's a 1997 romantic comedy.

[F]

I'm telling you. It's this exact one I'm talking about. There's a dog. I think he throws the dog down the trash chute.

[E]

As good as it Gets.

[F]

As good as it gets. That's correct.

[A]

That's it. Yep.

[C]

But Syracuse.

[D]

No, not on here.

[C]

What the man?

[F]

Georgia.

[D]

That's actually a good guess, though.

[C]

Thank you.

[A]

Oklahoma?

[D]

No.

[A]

Alabama.

[F]

No. Florida. Close. How about Miami?

[D]

Florida State. Brad Johnson. And an actress. Older.

[A]

Burt Reynolds.

[D]

Faye Dunaway.

[C]

Ah, so close.

[D]

Actress.

[A]

I have no idea where Actors and actresses. They should start repping that more frequently. I would like to see that. I mean, as far as I know, it's like Washington.

[D]

The last one is Wisconsin with Russell Wilson and some guy named Frederick March.

[A]

Okay.

[D]

But, yeah, like, the only actors you think of, like McConaughey, I don't even think he went to Texas.

[A]

I think he really.

[D]

He just loves Texas.

[A]

I think he did. I think he went to uta. I also think that. Yeah. Our knowledge of where actors went to college is. Is almost 100, based on college game day.

[D]

Okay. He did go to Texas.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Apologies.

[E]

Also teach there, like, one class, too.

[A]

Professor of chill he's director of morale. Right. Supervisor of morale at Texas, something like that. Yeah, he was. I know he was in a frat there. I read his book Green Lights, which I highly recommend to anybody that's interested in McConaughey. He's got a great story in there about smoking peyote with a mountain lion, which is just the most Matthew McConaughey story that you could ever imagine in your life.

[D]

So I just thought of an actor, and I was like, I've never heard of this guy going to college. I go. I Googled Brad Pitt. He went to a college. Do you know where he went?

[C]

Give me a region.

[D]

Midwest.

[A]

Pit pin.

[D]

I said Midwest, and you said Pittsburgh.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Pitt.

[D]

This is when. And we've talked about this on. So many years ago. The things people say in regards to regions of this country are asinine.

[C]

I know.

[A]

I said it because I knew you'd be upset.

[D]

Yeah. And I was. So congrats.

[F]

Indiana.

[D]

He went to the University of Missouri. Never heard a word about Brad Pitt in Missouri.

[A]

No.

[F]

No.

[A]

Have not. Like, you would like to see some of these guys show up for March Madness occasionally, Like, do a little funny, silly video with a mascot.

[F]

I would bet you that a lot of these actors and actresses did not complete their degrees.

[D]

He did not get a degree. That's correct.

[F]

And that maybe they were even only there for a brief moment to satisfy the. The wants of a parent before saying, I'm going to follow my dreams. I'm going to move to la.

[D]

But still, like, there are plenty of people who have done that, who love.

[F]

To claim, you know, I suppose that's true.

[A]

So this year we could have. Yeah. Sam Darnold. He'd be the first from usc, and.

[D]

He would join John Wayne and Forest Whitaker.

[A]

Okay.

[E]

It's a good duo.

[A]

That is a great duo.

[D]

And Drake May from North Carolina would join Luis Fletcher.

[A]

I'm surprised that USC hasn't done it yet. I. I bet if you looked up directors. That's a big film school, right?

[F]

Yeah.

[A]

You probably get a ton of directors from there. All right, That's a good trivia question.

[C]

Big T. Hey, Big T. I was looking up because I was trying to find the actor. I can't find his name, but it said, key to this is the AI overview.

[F]

But.

[C]

And I don't know if this is true, but key. Tennessee football celebrity fans. Dolly Parton. I knew that.

[D]

Kenny Chesney, kind of, but he's all over the place.

[A]

Dolly Parton never won an Oscar. She didn't win anything. For nine to five.

[C]

I guess not Justin Timberlake.

[D]

So. No. And I'm glad you brought this up, Aryan. Justin Timberlake, who is from Memphis, Tennessee, which is closer to probably Dallas than it is Knoxville. But that's fine. There's plenty of UT fans in Memphis. I'm not disparaging West Tennessee.

[E]

He.

[D]

In the 90s, when Peyton was playing at UT, was a UT guy and he was wearing Peyton Manning jerseys and all that. And then as soon as, like, Peyton left and Memphis started getting good at basketball, then he was all of a sudden the number one Memphis Tigers guy. And he was at the.

[C]

Damn.

[A]

The.

[D]

The 2008 number one versus number two Memphis, Tennessee basketball game. He was there, like number one Memphis guy. So he. So no, that's fake news.

[C]

It's fair to say he's a Tennessee guy.

[D]

Okay. Yeah, but he's. He's. He's Memphis first.

[A]

Yes, but you can't be a. Just a Tennessee guy.

[D]

Like, generally.

[A]

Yeah. It's like if you're a Virginia guy, you can't be uva and Virginia Tech guy.

[D]

Right.

[F]

Can you be a Jets fan and a Giants fan?

[A]

No. No, you can't. They. They hate each other, actually. It's weird. And it's all about families and. And if your family has roots in Long island, then you're definitely a Jets fan. Yeah. And they look at you sideways if you're a Giants fan.

[C]

Right.

[A]

You've got it too good. If you're a Giants, which is kind of weird.

[F]

It's like the Yankees and the Mats.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. Or if you're running for office, you can be both.

[D]

And what I noticed in New York is the teams generally collect together that it's Mets, Jets, Islanders.

[A]

Yep.

[D]

And then it's Yankees, Rangers, Giants.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

And then most people. Everyone. Nobody's a Nets fan.

[A]

Nobody cares.

[D]

Everybody is a Knicks fan.

[A]

No one cares about the.

[F]

Well, they used to be the New Jersey Nets.

[D]

Right.

[F]

I went and saw Keith Van Horn play.

[D]

Nice.

[F]

Yeah.

[D]

Congrats.

[A]

Good player.

[F]

I was. I was like, probably nine. We flew. We flew to see him from where? Maine.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

To Newark, just to see kvh.

[F]

Yeah.

[A]

That's pretty sick.

[F]

But I think Stephen Marbury was also on that team.

[A]

The Nets have always been, like, begging to be relevant.

[F]

They were pretty good back then. Jason Kidd played for the Nets. They went to the NBA Finals one year.

[D]

Carter.

[F]

Yeah. When he was getting older, I think.

[C]

No, they had Pete Carter.

[F]

Really? I thought Pete Carter was always Raptors.

[C]

He went from Raptors to the Nets. In the Nets, he was still him. And then after the Nets, he started kind of declining, but I mean, still he was.

[F]

Yeah. Who else was on that? There was a guy named Kendrick.

[C]

Kenyon Martin.

[F]

Kenyon Martin with the. He had the lip tattoo on his neck.

[A]

Yep. They had.

[F]

Was Carrie Kittles. That's who I was thinking of.

[A]

Carrie Kittles. And they also had Richard Jefferson.

[F]

Yeah.

[C]

Yes, Richard Jefferson. And they had a. That was a little later. Never mind.

[A]

I like basketball teams that are built like that. The Suns did that for a little bit. It's like get an awesome point guard and then get four guys that can just catch alley. Oops.

[F]

Yeah.

[A]

That's a tough, tough style basketball to defend. Yeah.

[D]

Do you know who the Nets drafted Carrie Kittles instead of.

[A]

Can you tell me the year it was?

[D]

1990. I mean, I don't. It's three or four.

[A]

Iverson?

[D]

No, the. I, They. I think the owner and GM wanted to draft Kobe and John Calipari did not. And they ended up. And Kobe also didn't want to play. He told them he didn't want to play in New Jersey, close to where he was from, and so they ended up not drafting him.

[C]

Out.

[B]

On the course, they're the PGA tourist's best players, but in the arena, they're prime time. And season two of TGL, presented by SoFi is back with lights, cameras, action. We're talking big moments, big personalities, big names in the stands all on the big screen. Big time matchups with shot clocks, Hammer drops, timeouts, overtime and playoffs. It's city versus city, squad versus squad. This sport just hits different under the lights. It's tgl, presented by Sports.

[F]

So far.

[D]

Keep up.

[B]

It's golf. Tune in to every match only on espn.

[A]

Big T. I've got a Tennessee related question, kind of for you. It's more about the Manning family.

[D]

Okay.

[A]

The Manning family. Obviously we remember Peyton, Eli, their careers. And we still talk a little bit about Eli on draft night where he, he was drafted by the Chargers, said that he didn't want to play ball there, force a trade, ends up with the New York Giants and the Chargers get Philip Rivers. Did we ever find out what exactly it is about the Chargers that Arch Manning, Archie Manning, found so distasteful and so, so detrimental to a young player's career that he did the power play and said, my boy's not playing there?

[D]

No. If I was purely speculating, I would say that the Mannings are interested in being a brand that is spread across America.

[A]

Okay.

[D]

I think you see, Peyton was like, I Want to start my own thing. I'm not going to Ole Miss. I'm going to go to Tennessee. Then Eli does go to Ole Miss. They've got those schools covered. Arch goes to Texas.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

One goes to Indianapolis and then Denver. The other goes to New York. I think it was maybe like a.

[F]

Market thing, like the Manning diaspora.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

So you think it was just San Diego? It was the city. More so than maybe.

[D]

I don't know. I mean, I don't know the. All the dynamics of those teams at that point, but I think the. The Mannings are very intentional in every move they make.

[A]

I agree. I think that Arch is. He played really well towards the end of the season. This year, I'm expecting big things from Arch, me personally, as an individual. And there's a good chance he could be the number one quarterback in next year's draft. Now, if it's the jets that are picking first, would he want his boy, his grandson, to go to New York? But Eli already has that covered.

[D]

Yeah. I don't know.

[A]

Be interesting to see.

[F]

But Eli didn't cover Long Island.

[A]

That's true. That's. That's very true. Like, what if it. What if it's Cleveland? What do you want is.

[D]

I mean, at some point. Yeah, you don't, you know.

[C]

You mean I got a Pro bowl quarterback? What are you talking about?

[F]

Two.

[D]

That is true.

[A]

Yeah. Desean Shador, embarrassment of riches at quarterback.

[E]

And a head coach that.

[A]

They do have a head coach. So, yeah. Mad Dog, I want to talk to you about that quickly. You guys finally found somebody that would take the job?

[E]

Apparently.

[A]

And it is Todd Monkin.

[E]

And apparently it is Todd Monkin, the.

[A]

Former offensive coach, offensive coordinator of the Ravens is now a Cleveland Brown head.

[E]

Coach and not racist against black quarterback, Correct?

[A]

Well, we don't know that yet. Well, I mean, he could start Dylan Gabriel.

[E]

That's true. That's true.

[A]

So this is a situation where if you're a Ravens fan, you're. You're extra excited because you hated Todd Bunkin and now the Browns got him. So it's like, win, win for you.

[E]

I don't know what happened.

[A]

What have you heard about Todd? Are you excited for Todd?

[E]

I've heard legit. Nothing. I didn't even. I knew he was still getting interviewed. I thought Nate Shieldhouse was pretty much a lockdown. I heard they were in LA yesterday finalizing agreements. I also thought if that didn't come through, it would have been Jim Schwartz, our soon to be former defensive coordinator. I did not see this coming. I do not know where this necessarily came from. I didn't hear a lot of buzz about him. I don't know too much about him besides the fact that he is or was the Ravens oc. I can't necessarily say I'm pumped. I don't think I know enough about the guy to be excited about him. Zuppy, who is my kind of beacon of hope for the Browns most of the time, said he's dead inside.

[A]

Okay.

[E]

So that's not like giving me a whole lot of confidence. I don't. I don't really know how to take this. I think you can you tell me.

[D]

How to take this.

[A]

I just know that. That fans that root for teams where he's the offensive coordinator get very upset with him.

[E]

That's awesome.

[A]

Just about across the board. It's like he. He's been one of the number one guys where it's like, fire this fucking asshole.

[E]

Like, which is, you know, I mean, he did get.

[A]

LaMar Jackson got two MVPs.

[D]

Maybe.

[A]

Maybe just one of the two MVPs.

[E]

He got an MVP.

[A]

He got an MVP under Todd Monkin, so that's cool.

[E]

Yeah.

[D]

But.

[E]

But Lamar Jackson's also. Lamar Jackson, like, Lamar Jackson is just a really talented quarterback. And I don't know how much credit I'm giving Todd Monken for Lamar being a great quarterback. Again, that may be my lack of ball knowledge. I'm not sure. But I think Lamar Jackson is just like a very qualified quarterback. Um, so very. I don't know.

[C]

Quarterback.

[E]

I don't know what he's going to do with Shador again. Pro Bowler. I, like, actually am at a loss for words. I'm really shocked. I really was getting excited about that Shield House guy. And now obviously that means Jim Schwartz is going to go somewhere else.

[A]

He said his goodbyes today.

[E]

I did hear that around the building. I heard that. Which I get. And we talked about that that was going to happen if he didn't get head coach. That's. That was kind of part of the deal. I did think that we weren't going to get this Todd Monken fella.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

So then I also don't know who's going to be our dc. Hard to replace a guy like Jim Schwartz. I actually don't even. Now that I'm saying that, I actually do not know who even would are. Like, who would our DC even be. I don't know who's still available. Maybe Sean McDermott. I don't know.

[C]

Okay.

[E]

I genuinely am at a loss.

[A]

He'd be a very good.

[E]

Hire Sean McDermott.

[A]

Yeah. If he would take the job.

[E]

Now, a question I'm asking. Could we not interview Sean McDermott?

[A]

What do you mean?

[E]

As a head coach, was he not like, around, like. I feel like he seemed like a good. Like, good idea.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

I don't know.

[A]

I don't know. I don't know who was. Who was taking interviews.

[E]

Yeah. That's also true. I. It's. It's putting in perspective. I think the Browns are actually a worse organization than I even thought, and I already knew that they were bad and poorly run, and I think the people at the helm are blind and deaf. This actually makes me feel like it's worse than I thought it was because it seems like we were untouchable, like no one wanted us.

[A]

Yeah.

[E]

And it is. Something did come out that Todd Monken did come across the sidelines about six years ago and say to coaches on the Browns that our organization is a, quote, mess. But that's my head coach.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Well, congratulations. You have a head coach.

[E]

Thank you. And so does Mackenzie.

[A]

That's true. That's true.

[D]

They.

[A]

They promoted Joe Brady. I'm excited about that. I like Joe Brady a lot.

[E]

Yeah. No, I do, too.

[A]

And it feels like this was Josh Allen saying, yeah, hire this guy.

[E]

I hope so.

[D]

Yeah.

[E]

Other people weren't happy, but I'm. I'm okay with it.

[A]

Yeah. Francis, you're a golf guy.

[F]

Sure.

[A]

Have you seen the news this morning?

[F]

Is that. That he came back?

[A]

Patrick Reed.

[F]

Oh. Oh.

[C]

He's back on the tour.

[D]

Patrick Reed.

[A]

He says. After careful thought and consideration, my family and I have decided I will no longer compete on the live golf Tour. I'm excited to announce I'm returning to PGA Tour as a past champion member for the 2027 season and am eligible to begin competing in PGA Tour events later this year. I believe in August, I will continue to compete and play as an honorary lifetime member on the DP World Tour, which is something that I am truly honored and excited to do. I'm a traditionalist at heart. That's what I've always thought about Patrick Reed. I'm traditionalist at heart.

[F]

Yes.

[A]

What the fuck does that mean? And I was born to play on the PGA Tour, which is where my story began, with my wife, Justine. Nice. Nice job throwing your name in there, Justine. As you. She definitely crafted this press release. I'm very fortunate for the opportunities that have come my way and grateful for the life we have created. I'm moving forward in my career. I look forward to competing on the PGA Tour and DP World Tour. I can't wait to get out there and revisit some of the best places on earth. To Dustin Johnson, the Aces and Live Golf. I want to thank you for the memories we shared and created together. To golf fans around the world, I just want to thank you for all your continued support throughout the years. I just ask that you respect the decision we've made for our family, our children, and our future. Thank you for your continued support. Patrick Reed. What do we think about this? Good for golf. Yeah.

[C]

I want autumn dudes back. Like, yeah, but we didn't.

[F]

I don't know about Patrick Reed.

[C]

I want him back. He's a fellow.

[F]

I don't know. If we needed him back, he could have stayed.

[C]

Nah, we need him back, dog. Why don't you like him?

[F]

He's cheats.

[D]

Does anyone like him?

[C]

That's the homie.

[D]

Are you friends with him?

[C]

Friends? Annoying.

[D]

I didn't know that.

[A]

Yeah, go on.

[C]

Like, we, you know, passing each other golfing in Houston. You know, recognizable figures. You cross paths in Houston.

[A]

What's he like?

[C]

He's kind of short. I don't know. What do you mean?

[A]

Is that what you say when people ask you about me? He's kind of short?

[C]

I don't know. He's really short. Like, he's shorter than advertised, actually.

[A]

That's just false.

[C]

And he popped his calf so he'll never touch rim again.

[A]

I know rim touching days.

[F]

Only cheek.

[A]

Yeah, only. There we go. I want.

[C]

I want all. I want all live. Excuse me, live players back in a pga because as dope as Scotty Scheffler is and has amazing runners, he having it. In my mind, it's like a little asterisk to it, because he wasn't competing against the best every week. Like, every week.

[A]

So that's interesting you say that. The asterisks goes to the guys that stayed on the tour.

[C]

Yeah, but not for the majors, because they were all. They could all play the majors, most of them. So, like, the best players in the world played in the Matrix, but, like, you didn't have A. Bryson, DeChambeau, Brooks, Koepka, whatever. All of y' all competing, like, at the Players Championship. You know what I mean?

[A]

Shit like that.

[C]

Or at the Farmers, you know, whatever the case may be. And, you know, some lot. They didn't play in all of them, but. But still, I mean, all the players weren't there. I just like to see. See him compete.

[A]

I agree that it's good for golf. Like you do the Villains are good. Patrick Reed is a. Is a fun guy to root against. And it's very funny when he wins because people get very upset about it. He never, like. Did you ever share a locker room with him, Patrick Reef? Yeah.

[C]

No.

[A]

Okay. Would you lock your locker if you knew he was a. He was on the premises.

[C]

Has he stole some? Yeah.

[A]

I don't know.

[C]

I don't know. The Patrick read law. I just met him. Right. I mean, what. What? Lace me.

[A]

What does he do, allegedly?

[D]

Isn't that why he got kicked off the golf team at uga?

[A]

Yeah. I don't know how much is, like, confirmed public information, but, yeah, I think.

[D]

Someone that was reported.

[A]

Yeah. And he cheated. Stole, like, a wallet or stole cash out of a wallet.

[D]

And then. Then he went to Augusta State and won them a national championship.

[A]

Yep. And then nobody on the tour liked him. It's a long. There's a lot of lore behind Patrick Reed, and he. He's good for golf. I agree. Having guys that you can be like this guy in golf is great. One thing people don't talk about is Vijay Singh. Vijay Singh had a rough go coming up as a young golfer. He. He cheated in an event. I think it was on the Australian tour or on the Asian Tour. He changed his score after his second round, deducted a stroke from it so he could make the cut, and everybody caught him, and he was suspended for a long time, maybe like six months or a year from the tour. And he was just known as a cheater for a long time, but nobody really talks about anymore because he had.

[C]

One of the best golf runs in the. In the middle of the best golf run of all time.

[A]

Yeah, he did. He was a. A tiger breaker to an extent.

[C]

All right.

[A]

Anything else we want to just touch on before we talk a little. Crockett.

[D]

Yeah. I have a question, and maybe it's good that France is here. This seems like something you would know about this Doomsday clock deal. Do y' all know anything about this? Because it just seems that every few years, they're like, oh, it's 85 seconds to midnight. What does this mean? Is any of it real? I suspect not.

[A]

They never set it back. Or when. If they do set it back, it doesn't get the publicity that it gets when they move it closer to midnight.

[C]

I'm. I'm not. I'm not hip.

[F]

What's.

[C]

What is this?

[A]

It's a clock. And I don't know who is in charge of keeping it, but they call it the Doomsday Clock. How close are we as a civilization to the entire thing being over, to everything just ending via nuclear war or whatever? And they said it closer to midnight, the more likely it is that there's going to be a nuclear war. And so when you have superpowers that are starting to fight each other by proxy or whatever, they move. They move the minute hand closer to midnight. And then I don't know if there's a second hand involved.

[D]

I think so, because as of the other day, we're 85 seconds to midnight.

[F]

Sounds like a band. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah, it does.

[D]

30 seconds to Mars and 85 seconds to midnight. I'm reading that during the Cuban Missile Crisis, they were at seven minutes. So it seems like these people are a little full of shit.

[A]

Yeah, that's what happened is they. They don't move it back. There's no chance that we're closer to midnight than we were during Cuban Missile Crisis. Although, Francis, one of my conspiracies is that I don't think that we have as many nuclear weapons as we say we have. I don't think that Russia does either. I think it's like we were in the Cold War. We kept over reporting our missile status, and so did they. And then we just got really, really scared of each other. And it's just kind of a good thing to keep people in check knowing that there's, what, 10,000 nuclear warheads out there that could be launched. I'm not buying it. Yeah, I don't. I don't buy it. I don't buy it. Why did they move it closer?

[D]

I have no idea.

[A]

They. They don't have, like, a press release.

[D]

They. They do their little presentation where they turn the quarter of a clock around, which, by the way, like, that's. That's a little extra. Just put a. The whole circle. And I'm sure they gave some sort of rationale, but I haven't seen it.

[A]

You're in the nothing ever happens category, though, correct? Yeah. Francis, before we do Davy Crockett, is there anything that you're up to right now you want to plug?

[F]

Well, stand up, going, things are great. Things are good. I did have a question for Arian, but it's a little sensitive and I don't really know how it'll go, but it's. I'm sorry. Oh, no. It's honestly, like just, I guess, a cultural difference question that I was hoping you could illuminate for me.

[C]

They'd all be my man.

[F]

You know how in the African American community they say sometimes they'll Say ax instead of ask. Yeah, but then they say, I just noticed. They'll. And I've noticed this before. They say asterisk instead of asterisk.

[D]

Right.

[F]

Well, those two sound contradictory to me. I think. I would think it would go the other way. So I'm wondering where that comes from.

[C]

I don't. I don't think we give a. Like, it's just. It acts ax and ask. It just comes from, like, lazy pronunciation, I guess. And over time, that just becomes what it is.

[F]

Oh, okay. I was never going to use the word lazy. I didn't know.

[C]

I mean, I don't even know if lazy is the correct term. It's just.

[A]

It's a.

[C]

It's an accent.

[F]

Cool.

[C]

And then over time, you know, that's how. That's how language develops.

[F]

Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

I've always noticed that if I'm talking with an African American friend about the company that we work at, it's very frequently barstools. Yeah. Like there's a. An s at the end. Yeah, yeah.

[F]

Now, is that apostrophe S or is it aa?

[D]

It.

[C]

Was it African American vernacular?

[F]

Aav.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Yeah. That is just. I don't know. It's culture. That's how you talk. It's different.

[A]

Maybe you try it out for size one time. Francis.

[F]

That feels like appropriation.

[A]

Yeah, maybe.

[B]

Out on the course, they're the PGA tourist best players, but in the arena, they're prime time. And season two of TGL, presented by SoFi, is back with lights, cameras, action. We're talking big moments, big personalities, big names in the stands, all on the big screen. Big time matchups with shot clocks, camera drops, timeouts, overtime, and playoffs. It's city versus city, squad versus squad. This sport just hits different under the lights. It's TGL, presented by SoFi.

[D]

Keep up.

[B]

It's golf. Tune in to every match, only on espn.

[A]

It's funny because we're doing the. We're doing the basketball tournament this week. And if you thought last year that we had the. What? Whitest group of people playing basketball. We added Francis and white boy Rick to it.

[F]

Yeah.

[A]

And we got. There's no wider room in America, I don't think anymore.

[F]

We don't need lights.

[A]

No. No. Glow in the dark Basketball.

[F]

Yeah.

[A]

Let's talk about Davy Crockett.

[C]

Cool.

[A]

Actually, I did a bad job. I was asking if you wanted to plug anything.

[F]

Oh, no. You know, check out Son of a Boy Dad.

[A]

Great podcast.

[F]

Thank you.

[C]

Is that we're wrong.

[F]

Yeah.

[C]

Is he still battle rapping?

[F]

Not well. No, not really. I mean, occasionally he'll. He'll drop in and do one, but I think he sort of conquered that now he's moved on.

[C]

Conquer's crazy. But yeah, he was a killer.

[F]

Well, he was King of the Dot. He was world champion.

[C]

That was. I think URL is probably the main league.

[F]

Really?

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Are we saying that would have been.

[D]

Dominating the G League?

[A]

Is this an asterisk?

[C]

King of the Dot is like. It was the Canadian version of URL. URL was the first.

[F]

Huh.

[A]

Smack.

[C]

Smack. That's what you ain't never watched.

[F]

Smack smack DVDs. Smack DVD.

[C]

Back in it. Back in the day.

[F]

Yeah. That was Gin. And then those guys would always go on 106 and park on bet. You say gin Jin, the Chinese rapper.

[C]

You think of Smack Battle, but think of Gin. That's crazy.

[F]

Well, he used to dominate Jin. No.

[C]

Wasn't he the best battle rapper now you're appropriate.

[F]

I feel like I'm inappropriate.

[A]

Is this. Yeah.

[C]

Murder Mook. Murder Mook used to kill back then. Sirius Jones used to kill back then. Lux J. Mills. There was a bunch of cats back the Lions Den back then. That was. Them were the days. But, I mean, Jen was nice, don't get me wrong. But it was different. There was levels and.

[F]

You all right? I'm glad you could give Jen a little love. Cause that was all I had.

[C]

Jim was a killer. He was really good at freestyling.

[F]

That's what I thought.

[C]

Yeah. He was really good at, like, off the top. Like, people don't really do that anymore. Because when people started coming with written raps, you gonna get murdered.

[F]

So he would still do that, though. He would still do the, like, the three round. You go, then he go then. Right?

[C]

Yeah. I think you're thinking of Fight. I think it was called Fight Club.

[F]

Maybe.

[C]

I don't remember Jen on Smack. He could have been, but I don't remember Jen on smack.

[A]

We gotta get. We gotta get Roan to talk about the. The difference between URL and. And the dot. Because he'll tell you. I think he's. He might be on the yak right now.

[C]

Fuck the yak.

[A]

It's. Rona is like the most talented guy we have. So it would make sense for him to dominate one thing. And then he's like, yeah, I'm kind of bored beating everybody. I'll just go on and be really good.

[C]

I want to disparage. Rome was nasty. Like, don't get me wrong. But from a battle fan's perspective that's watched this since the jump URL is like the, you know, summer madness. That. That's. That's like the main stage. And then you have other battle leagues that did their thing for sure.

[A]

And there was.

[D]

Changes everything. Aryan hates Ron.

[C]

Well, I mean, if you're too crazy. I love Ro was cold.

[D]

And he said Roan has been in the G league. That's what he said.

[A]

If you're doing Canadian battle rap, I have to imagine it's more polite than United States. I mean, they did do the compliment battles. That's very Canadian.

[C]

Now, Ron has been on smack, don't get me wrong, but he said he. He won King of the dot. King of the Dot is not. It's not smack.

[F]

Do you think he went against Jin?

[C]

Yeah, I think. You think Jen is better than he is. Jen is good, though, bro. Like, when you think of, like, top battle rappers all the time, you're not thinking about Jen.

[F]

Jen's up there.

[A]

He's rapping against plumbers and lawyers. Yeah, Jen's right up there.

[C]

You think Jim's better than Mook?

[F]

Yeah.

[C]

What?

[F]

Connor Mook?

[C]

Who the is Connor Mook?

[F]

He works here.

[A]

He's like a mini.

[C]

Jen is better than Connor Mook. Yeah, I saw my murder Mooc.

[F]

Murder Mooc.

[A]

Okay, we'll have to. We'll have to talk to Roan about this.

[F]

Scarier name than Jen.

[A]

Davy Crockett. Let's talk Dave. He actually prefers that we call him David.

[F]

Really?

[A]

Yeah. Davy Crockett was. That was his, like, boy name. And so he got mad when people would call him Davey his whole life. He preferred to grow up and change it.

[D]

David Crockett is a lawyer that could be in Knoxville right now.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Davy Crockett personally is injury the man.

[F]

David Crockett is the men's counterpart to the Betty Crocker home oven.

[D]

Is that true?

[F]

Yeah, It's a grill.

[A]

The David Crockett.

[F]

You can cook. You teach your son to cook with.

[A]

Yeah. This is for men. Is for men. There's a great line in Forrest Gump where he's like, we got more money than David Crockett.

[D]

You remember a lot of lines from Forrest Gump.

[A]

I do, yeah. It's my favorite movie.

[D]

I think once every couple months, you pull out another Forrest Gump line.

[A]

Do you think that Forrest Gump would hold up if it came out now? I think that it would, yeah.

[D]

It get canceled?

[C]

No, nothing gets canceled.

[A]

He played the role with respect. He cried when Mama died on a Wednesday.

[D]

I don't know, man. I don't know. That that comes. I think it's still a great movie. Yeah, but I don't know. I don't know that it comes out.

[A]

I think it's a great movie. I think it would hold up to this day.

[D]

I was watching the Veep the other day that came out in, what, 2013. You could not make Veep today.

[A]

Wrong, wrong.

[F]

You could.

[A]

You confuse this a lot. Big T. If, if so people are like, oh, you couldn't make the office these days because Michael Scott said inappropriate things. If you say these things through a character and show the flaw in the character as they're saying the bad things, that's much different than having, like, the message behind the movie being like, what things are. Stanley, you're black.

[D]

What things are coming out right now where people are saying stuff like that?

[A]

I don't know. I, I don't, I know.

[D]

You don't know.

[A]

We haven't had any good, we haven't had any good comedies.

[C]

It's like what, though? Like, what is, what is what?

[A]

Offensive comedies.

[D]

Yeah, there was just some, like Veep, they say. Crazy.

[C]

Our president calls people names all the time. Nobody gives a fuck.

[D]

But I, I, I agree with that. But I'm saying, like, companies don't make entertainment with that.

[A]

What are the best comedies to come out in the last five years? Comedy movies? There haven't been too many studios aren't like, aren't any taking chances on, on anything these days.

[C]

That's, that's the, that's what it is. It's, it's. Hollywood is not. Hollywood is drying up. And the only thing that they come out with are revamps of old because they know people will go watch it, but they're like people that, people that invest in these movies, they don't. There's not going to get a return because streaming is ruined. Has nuked the, the movie industry. So that's it.

[A]

It's not, it's not just two examples. Hands that out that I see right now. So we got Shorsey, we got Letterkenny, two great Canadian comedy shows that came out. Those are somewhat offensive at times, but.

[D]

It'S always never seen them. But also those have been out for what, 10 years.

[A]

It's also the, it's the shitty characters that are, are making the most offensive. Like South Park. South park is still going to this day still as strong as it's ever been.

[D]

And that's not true.

[A]

You don't think so?

[F]

No, I would think it is.

[D]

You think south park is as good now as it's ever been?

[F]

I just think it's. As far as its reception or audience, it's. Or it's cultural.

[D]

I disagree with that also, but I. I thought you meant, like, the content is as good as it's ever been.

[A]

I can't say I watch a lot of south park, but it's definitely in the national discourse right now, right?

[D]

Yeah. People are watching what it is.

[A]

Yeah. I think it's. You can still make the right comedy. You can make offensive comedies, but also you're.

[D]

You're naming things that have existed for 20 years.

[C]

Yeah. Did they just come out with one?

[A]

It was, like, three years ago.

[C]

They came out with an episode where, Remember the old south park was Saddam used to have the devil as a gay lover.

[A]

Yep.

[C]

They did Trump as the devil with the gay lover, right?

[A]

Yep.

[E]

I mean, like, Always Sunny has been out forever, but they're still pretty offensive, I feel.

[A]

Yeah. And it's. It's. If you do it right, you can be as offensive as you want. Like, everybody watches Always Sunny with the premise that, like, these are for the worst people.

[C]

Dave Chappelle came out with another Netflix thing where he has more trans jokes.

[A]

Yep.

[D]

But that's.

[C]

People. People get upset, but, like, what are you going?

[D]

That's himself. Like, he. He's massive. He can do whatever he wants. That's not a studio making something You're.

[C]

You're whittling.

[E]

What about the studio?

[D]

No, I said. I said, like, there aren't shows coming out anymore that are like that.

[A]

Francis, you're a comedy writer. Explain how difficult it is to write comedy in 2026.

[F]

I mean. I mean, I haven't really had a whole lot of success with it, but that's probably just my fault. It's probably my mediocrity rather than my continued swings at offensiveness that they tell me I can't get through.

[A]

I feel like comedy writers, that it's way easier to be like, yeah, you can't be funny anymore than it is to actually make something that's funny. So a lot of guys, they just. They go that line.

[F]

Well, I think there was a moment where, yeah, the sort of scope in which you could operate was narrowed, but then I think it reopened. I don't think anyone cares anymore.

[A]

As. As our friend Will Compton said after Shane Gillis's monologue on snl, we're saying gay. And again, America is so back. Poet Laureate Will Compton. I love that Shane's doing great, though. Yeah. Like, there's. There's offensive comedy out there.

[F]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

And if you watch Shane's standup. He's not saying offensive stuff to be offensive. It's in the context of a larger story that he's telling. And he's. He's usually approaching it from a very funny perspective.

[F]

I just saw, I went and saw him at Madison Square Garden last weekend, and Michael Che opened for him and did 15 minutes on Charlie Kirk.

[A]

Yeah.

[F]

And it was unbelievable.

[A]

Yeah, there's. There's and that.

[F]

And nobody, you know, batted an eye. The occasional groan, I guess.

[D]

But is that a shock to you in New York City?

[F]

I think again, it's like, you know, if you just are precise enough, then if the funny can over, you know, you have to be funnier.

[D]

I don't disagree with you. But he wasn't, he didn't have a hostile audience.

[A]

It was a Shane Gillis audience, which is like, you know, ready for offensive comedy, I guess. Right.

[D]

That's a. That's in his favor.

[A]

Yeah.

[F]

Yeah.

[A]

I'm somewhat agreeing with you, but yeah, I think you can make anything funny. I think anything could be funny if it's done from the right perspective.

[F]

Yeah, I think Bill Burr said that, like, you can, you can make a joke about anything, but it, it had better be. The more dangerous the topic, the funnier it has to be or the tighter the joke needs to be.

[A]

Yeah, it could be funnier than it is mean.

[D]

I think there's a lot of that in Stand up right now, but I still. I have not seen many shows or movies being released right now that have similar tones and jokes to like the officer.

[F]

I think tires is pretty similar jokes and tone in some ways.

[D]

I haven't seen it.

[F]

It's like a blue collar version of your office. It's not why I'm. That's not. I promise, that's not why I brought it up. I mean, there's no. I'm not themes and episodes there that, you know, I'm only in one and like the rest of the season covers.

[D]

You know, have you seen it?

[F]

Sexual harassment training, stuff like that.

[A]

I've only watched Francis scene.

[E]

Okay.

[D]

I was gonna ask if you think I would like it.

[A]

Yeah, you would. You would enjoy it.

[E]

I think you would like. I think you'd like it. It's very funny. It's funny. Francis has a Polynesia.

[D]

If I. If I watch this. No. Okay, well, we'll see.

[F]

Let's do this. Don't watch it.

[D]

I can do that.

[F]

Yeah, let's. Let's just all save ourselves the, the trouble.

[D]

No. Yeah, I like that idea.

[A]

I love Stavi's character because he's always eating. He's always got something in his hands.

[F]

Yeah.

[A]

Stavi's doing, by the way, Bugonia. You should watch Bugonia.

[D]

Very in the world.

[A]

Very good movie that Stavi was in. Yeah. One of my favorites of the year.

[E]

Nominated for best picture.

[A]

Was it really?

[E]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. So stop. He's going to the Oscars.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

I mean, I can't wait to see who he wears. Yeah, that's gonna be great.

[E]

I believe he was at the Golden Globes, if I'm not mistaken.

[A]

Was he really good for styling? I really enjoyed that movie a lot.

[F]

I liked it too.

[D]

But Alicia Silverstones, weird.

[E]

Yeah.

[F]

She's the mother in the bed.

[A]

Was she really?

[D]

You're asking the wrong guy.

[A]

I don't know. I had such a crush.

[D]

Wikipedia said she's in it.

[A]

I run into a house of mirrors in my own brain where I had a big crush on Alicia Silverstone when I was 12. She was 17 at the time and so I remember having a crush on Alicia Silverstone. But then as an adult, you can't have a crush on 17 year old Alicia Silverstone anymore.

[F]

No.

[A]

And now I'm starting. As I see her getting older, I'm having less of a crush on her.

[F]

Yeah.

[A]

As an older person, you gotta have.

[F]

A crush now on Alicia Greystone.

[A]

Yeah.

[F]

Yeah.

[A]

There we go.

[F]

Yeah, I like that silver fox. Yeah, Silver fox.

[C]

Yeah. I had that with Topanga. You remember Topanga? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like she's beautiful now.

[F]

She looks the same.

[C]

I like older women anyway, so they're.

[F]

Coming to me, you know, I like old women.

[C]

They grow to me.

[A]

How old, how old do you go, Francis?

[F]

There's. There, there's no limit. There's just a lower limit. Yeah, there's a basement.

[A]

It's good. What's the basement now?

[F]

39.

[A]

What about you, Aaron?

[C]

That's the basement.

[F]

That's my basement.

[C]

My basement.

[A]

Probably like 35, but he likes them old.

[F]

That's you. 35 is as young as you would date.

[C]

Oh, yeah, Date? Oh, no, I wouldn't even date a 35 year old. That's just like, you know, let's have a good weekend. Like date like when?

[F]

You mean.

[A]

Like.

[C]

Yo, we about to try to see if we can go somewhere in the relationship. Nah, they gotta be my age or older.

[F]

Well, how old are you?

[C]

39.

[F]

Oh, wow, that's great.

[A]

I'll take it up to 70. Martha Stewart still looks great, by the way.

[C]

I'm not dating no 70 year old. No Martha though.

[D]

That's the first time I've ever heard you put a cap on it.

[C]

No, I'm not dating a seven year old. I will. Hey, seven year old come my way. She looking all right?

[E]

Have a good weekend.

[C]

Yeah, now we can have a good weekend. Absolutely.

[F]

Do you think there's any benefit to cozying up to someone who's, you know, ailing and hoping that they will change their will to favor you?

[C]

We call those gold diggers.

[F]

We would be though.

[C]

Women do that shit all the time.

[F]

So flip the script. You know, I don't know if you need.

[C]

I'm already. I'm already rich. I'm straight. I'm not finna.

[F]

You wouldn't spoon the corner of the mouth of applesauce into the center of the mouth of some, you know, bedridden fossil to be bequeathed her fucking manner.

[C]

Is she cool?

[F]

Can't even speak. She's a vegetable.

[C]

Oh, then no, that's weird.

[F]

No, it's a little community service for a lifetime of.

[C]

Hell. I gotta read you this spam. I got this spam, dude to stop texting me. Shit's hilarious. So he goes, I came across your number, but can't remember who you are. Mind reminding me? I said, I am Jesus of Nazareth. He said, happy New Year. I thought you remember me. So I forgot to introduce myself. I'm Maya from Vancouver. Do you remember me? I said, oh, hell yeah. Freaky little thing. And then. And then he sent a picture, right? Some random woman.

[A]

Clear, legit. Yeah, right.

[C]

And I said, oh, no, I'm only into 70 plus women. He said, why? I said, pop them. Pop them dentures. I have a. Have a great time. Stop texting me.

[A]

You should do a Google reverse image search on that. How you do that? See that picture? You gotta save it to your phone.

[C]

Okay.

[F]

Saved.

[A]

And Then type in google.com on your browser.

[C]

That's cool.

[A]

You got to go to the like desktop version or whatever. I don't know if it's. If you can do it on the mobile version, google.com. all right, and then there should be like a camera next to the search bar. So hit that. And then should give you an option to like upload the picture.

[C]

Yes, it does.

[A]

And do a search.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

MacKenzie Bezos is 55. That seems like that would be a good, good girlfriend to have.

[E]

She's got all her money away.

[F]

Oh, that's Jeff's ex wife.

[A]

Yeah.

[F]

Ah, yes. She married that English teacher for some. For a little bit there.

[A]

Yeah.

[F]

There's a rebound bad boy didn't work out.

[C]

Oh, it saved in whatever date that it was taken.

[F]

It doesn't say who's who that girl is.

[C]

Well, so no, it saved in my library. Like, it didn't save it in my recent. Right. Oh, so you know what I'm saying?

[A]

Screenshot it.

[E]

I was gonna say screenshot.

[F]

That's such an annoying feature.

[A]

I know. They need to change that, right?

[F]

Yeah.

[C]

Okay. So January 1st looks like. Okay.

[D]

The iOS updates are what I complain about in regards to social media a lot, which is we've given people jobs where they have to be doing something so they do something, but we don't need it. Like I did. They. They overhauled iOS. That was perfectly fine. Now if I want to take a screenshot of a text, I can't do it without having the texts above it that are in it or to see what person it is. And you've got click 4 things to save a screenshot.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

It's like you get. If you want to pay somebody, like an engineer, just pay them, but don't make them mess everything up.

[A]

Yeah. Sometimes people, they. They get projects to justify their paycheck.

[D]

Right.

[A]

Justify their job. So they have to be innovating something that doesn't need innovating.

[D]

Right.

[A]

Yeah, I agree with that.

[C]

It took me to a bunch of websites trying to sell the sweater this girl has on. Oh, all right.

[F]

Oh, actually, I'd like to know where I can get that.

[A]

It is a nice sweater.

[C]

This is a cool sweater. Oh, speaking of which, I got my mom's came through and she always watch Project Runway. Yeah, I have been watch binge watched a season and a half. Oh, my God, I kind of love that dog. You remember how I got. My whole thing was like, I don't really know about fashion and never been my vibe.

[E]

I mean. Yeah. Now look at you.

[C]

I think I get it. I think I get it. It's like I'm over here judging the Runway girls and stuff. And another thing, it made me respect model models and how they walk. They be working that shit. Cause they had an episode where they did. They had the stylist style crew members, like just regular people who like working behind a camera, whatever the case may be. And the difference between them walking down the Runway and then with somebody who actually. That's what they do, man. Respect. It's a difference. It's a thing. It's an attitude.

[F]

Yeah, I get it, Gary. And if you're getting into that, man, you gotta get into Japanese clothing. I'll tell you what, I have some Japanese clothing, like Orly and Camoli and.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, send me some links, dog. I'm in.

[F]

Yeah, because they just did Paris fashion Week, and everyone was raving about the Orly show.

[C]

So what's. What's in now is like the. The baggy shit has. Is starting to make a comeback big time. Right. And so. So what I did was, you know, now that I'm starting to get into fashion a little bit, starting to revamp.

[E]

The.

[C]

Closet a little bit, you know?

[F]

Yeah.

[B]

Out on the course, they're the PGA Tour's best players, but in the arena, they're prime time. And season two of TGL, presented by SoFi, is back. With lights, cameras, action. We're talking big moments, big personalities, big names in the stands, all on the big screen. Big time matchups with shot clocks. Hammer drops timeouts over time and. And playoffs. It's city versus city, squad versus squad. This sport just hits different under the lights. It's TGL, presented by SoFi.

[C]

Keep up.

[A]

It's golf.

[B]

Tune in to every match only on espn.

[F]

I'm psyched about the baggies being back, so I can finally keep my guns on me again.

[A]

Hell, yeah.

[C]

You got guns?

[F]

I'm getting one.

[D]

What kind?

[C]

What kind you getting?

[F]

A revolver.

[C]

A gun?

[D]

Really?

[F]

Yeah.

[C]

Why are you getting a fucking 1812 gun, bro?

[F]

I'm gonna get a revolver. Well, to be honest with you, there's this store near my place upstate in New York, and it's like a market that has a butcher's area in the back, and then there's an open door that leads right into the gun store.

[D]

Love that.

[F]

So you. I'm not kidding you. They're both. It's called quattros. And one part is beautiful pastas and olive oils and things like that with great prime meat. And then the other part of the store is guns. And I went into the gun area, and there were a bunch of guys hanging out, hanging out. And when I walked in, they went quiet. It was like a scene out of a movie. I changed the air in the room.

[A]

They could sense you.

[F]

And I don't know if it's because I was what I was wearing or what, but I was browsing with my hands behind my back, you know?

[A]

Yeah. You looked like a fed.

[F]

Yeah, maybe. And I just thought to myself, the way I can solve this is by having a gun.

[C]

Yep.

[A]

So to make new friends. You got a gun to make?

[F]

I want to walk in there and have them be like, oh, what? What do you got?

[A]

Yeah, one of us.

[F]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah, that. I understand the appeal of that. So you're going to get, like, a license to carry it in New York or what?

[F]

I won't. I won't be able to bring it into the city. I'll keep it at my upstate place. The only thing I'm worried about is my history of mental health.

[A]

Yep.

[F]

I don't know if I'm going to pass muster.

[A]

I think they'll just move you.

[C]

What's your mental health issue?

[F]

Well, one time I threatened to bomb the New York City office at Barstool because they were just. They wouldn't let up.

[A]

Now, was that directed at one person?

[F]

No. General is out and loud, but that's bombs. That's not guns.

[A]

But if you showed them, like, a highlight reel of Meek Phil and Frank the Tank, like, just going nuts, they'd.

[F]

Be like, you need one.

[A]

They'd be like, I get it.

[F]

Yeah, you need. You need more than a pistol.

[A]

Yeah. They probably raid that place like. Like Waco.

[F]

Yeah.

[C]

And you said Quattros.

[F]

Mm.

[C]

Want to hear you try to roll your Rs.

[F]

Quatros, quatro, cuatros.

[C]

Quatros, Quatros.

[A]

I had a gun in the city for a while.

[F]

Shut up. Really?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Was it legal?

[D]

Illegal?

[A]

No. Elite was hot.

[C]

You. You was out there packing heat, Dirty heat?

[A]

Yeah.

[F]

Unlicensed. No serial number.

[A]

Serial number?

[F]

Yeah.

[A]

I. I bought it in Texas as a bit. We were doing a. A thing before the super bowl, and it was in. In Houston, Texas. I got the gun. I. We were doing the Canadian boys. Remember Me and Big Cat used to go around just being Canadian. And so we were, like two Canadians going to the Super Bowl. And we stopped in a gun store, and I brought, like, a stack of documents with me. I was like, here's. Here's a letter of recommendation from my neighbor. He says I'm a good guy. Here's my. My marks from preschool all the way up through primary and 13th grade to 14th grade there at university. And they all say, I'm good to own a gun. And they were like, we don't need any of that, sir. Don't. Here's your gun. And so just, like, bought a gun. We shot, like, an automatic rifle when we were there, too. It was a lot of fun. And so then I had a gun. And then they had to drive the RV back to New York. And I tried. I. My plan was to sell the gun to chaps who lived in Texas. It would have been clear and legal. Virtually no rules around selling the gun. Chaps had uncontrollable diarrhea that week. So Chaps could not show up to buy the gun from me. It's time to go back to New York. I don't know what to do with this gun. None of my friends want to buy a gun in Texas. So it just gets packed on the rv, driven back to New York. I have to pick it up from the RV because they're like, we can't have this gun in the car. So I kept the gun in my apartment for a couple years, and the entire time, I was just thinking to myself, like, I am committing a serious felony every single day. Yeah. In New York City. So I looked up the gun buyback laws there that they have because they. They're pretty open. If you have a gun, you can turn it into a police station, no questions asked. They'll give you 200 bucks and send you on your way. So I brought it to the station. I put my backpack one day, walked down the street. That was a very nervous walk. Yeah. Because I'm like, what if, you know, just through happenstance, a cop decides to search my backpack or something? Then I'm definitely going to jail for, like, five years. So I make it to the police station, and I'm like, I know that you guys have this gun buyback program. I'd like to turn in a firearm. And the cop starts asking for my license, my name, all this information. I'm like, don't want to be a dick, but I do know the law that I can do this anonymously and give it back. And so they're like, okay, let me get the detective over here. Detective comes over. He starts asking me the same questions. I'm like, I got myself in a situation now where they want my information. I don't want to go to jail. And I'm like. I just. Listen, I'd really like to remain anonymous. I know that this is the law in New York City. You can turn in a firearm. And then. Then from the back of the room, this guy stands up. He's like, hey, pft.

[F]

Oh.

[A]

And I'm like, listen, man, I'm just trying to. I'm trying to do the right thing. I have not taken this gun out since I've been in New York City. I don't have any ammunition for it. I just want to get rid of it because it's been in the back of my head for a long time. And they're like, okay, yeah, we'll do it. So they gave me the. The 200 bucks, sent me on my way, and that was that.

[F]

Wow.

[A]

But, yeah, that. That cop Almost.

[D]

I guess.

[A]

Nervous situation, I guess.

[D]

200 bucks if you're ridding yourself of the liability of a felony is fine, but that's kind of a terrible deal.

[A]

Yeah, I could have gotten more. Yeah, could have gotten more for it. I don't think. I. I think it was almost like a voucher where you took it somewhere else and then someone else gave you cash for the voucher that you had. I don't think.

[D]

Oh, so they, they YouTube TV'd you, they made you go through another step.

[A]

Yes. Yeah, I don't think I ever did that step. I think I was just happy to not have the gun. But. Yeah, you'll love being a gun owner, Francis. Yeah, it makes you feel like a man. It really. I get it.

[C]

So I was thinking if you. If you got popped on the way to.

[F]

Right.

[C]

I think the only way to get out of it is you have to carry a pre written note. It says, I'm taking this to the gun buyback program. I think it's the only way it would work.

[F]

You could. I was thinking about that too, Arian. You and I were both thinking it and I was thinking he could have just thought of it first, maybe just ahead. I was also thinking, but because I.

[D]

Was thinking, why didn't you Uber?

[F]

Well, I was going to say you could put into your Google maps the destination for the police station and then hit start the directions, the walking directions. And if you pulled up that live map that says you've got six minutes, that's compelling that he's on his way there.

[A]

I did do that, actually. I had the maps out in my hand, in my phone, ready. I actually brought it to the office to take it from the office to the police station. I thought about doing the Uber, but if you get in the Uber, then I don't want to bring the driver into the equation. Like, could he get in trouble?

[D]

I mean, with all maybe, what's it to you?

[F]

I mean.

[A]

Well, yeah, he would. Fair point.

[F]

He's probably not from this country.

[A]

I didn't want to. I didn't want to drag him.

[D]

I'm just saying my situation.

[A]

I didn't want to.

[C]

Well, I.

[D]

Very easily explainable for him. He would never have gotten in trouble.

[A]

I also thought about the calculus of.

[F]

Put the bang in Bangladesh, you know what I mean? Right in the back of the head.

[A]

More likely to get into a car accident than I would be if I was just walking to get pulled over by a cop on the sidewalk.

[D]

With the way Ubers drive in New York, that's probably True, but you're more likely to. I don't know. I mean, yeah, there's no stop and frisk. You're fine.

[A]

But there was one employee of Barstool who will. I'll keep this person anonymous for this story.

[F]

Billy Football Close.

[A]

They were in the New York office. They found out about my gun situation, and they pulled me aside in HQ1 in New York, the first office that we had there, and. And pulled me into the kitchen because that's where there's no cameras and no microphone set up. And this person was like, I heard about the gun. Here's what we're going to do. We're going to disassemble it. I'm going to file the serial number off of it for you. We're going to put it into different Ziploc bags, fill the bags with bleach, and then we're going to go to different bridges in New York and throw them over the edge into the different parts over the edge of the water. Now, this part is still going to be technically the gun part, because it's the what? The lower register. If you disassemble a gun, there's one small part that still counts as a handgun if you have it, and all the other parts, like the end of the barrel, all that stuff, that's just accessories. Yeah. He's like, so we're gonna throw these. We're gonna give them to different interns and send the different interns out to the bridges to throw them in. I was like, dude, I'm just gonna go to the buyback program. I think that should work out.

[F]

Yeah. It sounds like how Voldermort spread his Horcruxes.

[A]

I've never seen Harry Potter, but that sounds legit.

[F]

Damn.

[A]

I'm gonna. I'm gonna count that as a great reference.

[F]

It felt good.

[A]

Yeah, it's a good reference.

[F]

Yeah. But interestingly, he did that to preserve. It doesn't matter. Clearly, this group is not into it. Arian, are you a Harry Potter guy?

[C]

Wouldn't call me a Harry Potter guy, but it's cool.

[F]

Okay.

[A]

Okay. Davy Crockett. Davy Crockett. King of the wild frontier.

[D]

Original Harry Potter. Many have said.

[A]

Yeah, good point. Yeah, good point, Big T. So, yeah, it's kind of.

[D]

All right.

[F]

The Mexicans tried to kill his parents.

[D]

Yeah.

[A]

So he was. He didn't go to school until he was 13. David Crockett. Yeah. He started his education when he was, like, around middle school, late middle school, high school age. And his dad was like, I. You got to go to School. I'm sick of having you around, Davey. You're getting in trouble. And so he went to school when he was 13 for the first time. He went for four days, and then he got into a fight. And he beat the out of an older kid and then ran away from home. That's kind of his origin story, so he said. I just began to learn my letters a little. When I had an unfortunate falling out with one of the scholars, a boy much larger and older than myself. He was starting to learn his letters when he was 13. Kind of crazy. So he. He ambushed the bully after class, beat the out of him. And then he started skipping school. His dad found out he was skipping school. And Davy Crockett ran away from home to get away from his dad, to escape the beating that his dad was going to give him. His dad chased him for a couple miles. But his father, John Crockett, he got tired and Davey ran away, headed out east. And he went with a group of cattle drovers and spent two and a half years traveling around, working as a farmhand. He was a hat maker's apprentice. And when he got home in 1802, he had been gone so long and grown so much that the family didn't recognize him at all. Then he went back to work with his dad to help him pay off his debts. And that's kind of how he started. His first memory was out with his brothers on the river. He had four older brothers and he had a buddy. They were on a canoe and they left Davey behind. And Davey got pissed off. And the canoe started drifting to a waterfall. And Davey said I was so infernal mad that they had left me on the shore, that I had soon as seen them all go over the falls a bit and.

[C]

Are you making that his accent?

[A]

That's how. That's how he wrote it. I was so infernal mad they left me on the shore that I had as soon seen them all go over the falls.

[C]

No, but you had a little accent. Every time you do his voice, you have a little accent.

[A]

I guess. I mean, it sounds. It sounds like Mark Twain dialogue. Okay. He sounds like Huckleberry Finn, Tom Sawyer.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

I didn't realize I was doing an accent. If I'd done an accent, it would have been way better.

[C]

Run it back. Every time you did his voice, I.

[A]

Was so infernal mad that they left me on the shore as soon as I seen them all go the falls a bit as any other way. That's me, Davy Crockett, king of the wild. Frontier.

[D]

That's more of a. It's more of an Alabama you got going on there than in East Tennessee.

[A]

I put some of the S's in there. Like Tennessee accent does.

[D]

You're not from that far from East Tennessee.

[A]

I'm not. I've got. I've got a lot of relatives that, that live in East Tennessee and central Tennessee. I've heard that accent my whole life. Near my whole life. So he was kind of the Hitler of black bears. He killed. Guess how many black bears he killed in one seven month span? One time?

[F]

40.

[A]

105.

[F]

Heavens.

[A]

He said he killed 105 black bears in seven months. He spent his life stalking black bears in the woods of Tennessee, selling their pelts, their meat. The bear oil and bear flesh was very profitable, as was their fat.

[F]

I ate bear two days ago.

[A]

What'd you think?

[F]

I didn't love it.

[A]

Was it gamey?

[F]

It was gamey. But also everyone who, everyone warns you about trichinosis because bears eat dead animals.

[A]

Yeah.

[F]

And their stomach enzymes can break down the point like the worm, but it will carry to you unless you cook the meat through above 165 degrees for a long time. And then like, even then, apparently there's still some risk. So you're eating it and you're like, I'm eating something that I'm fundamentally aware could really, really make me sick and that.

[D]

And it wasn't good.

[F]

Yeah, it just kind of. You're like, why am I risking this?

[D]

Did it make it just like.

[F]

Like I did a cold, I did a slow cook stew to make sure I cooked it for like six hours.

[A]

So you cooked the fuck out of that meat.

[F]

Yeah, but I slow cooked it. So I mean, if it had, I don't know. It was fine. It was fine. Wasn't my favorite thing.

[A]

Does it, does it make the experience better knowing that's dangerous?

[F]

No, it made it worse for me.

[A]

Yeah. It just made you like nervous, anxious.

[F]

I didn't even look up the symptoms of trichinosis. I didn't want to know because then.

[A]

You'Ll start thinking, maybe I got this.

[F]

Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. My right eye is kind of right shut right now.

[C]

What are the, what are the symptoms of trichinosis?

[F]

I don't know.

[A]

Pale skin.

[F]

Oh, you want to. We can look that up. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah, look that up.

[F]

Big T.

[B]

Out on the course, they're the PGA Tour's best players, but in the arena, they're prime time. And season two of TGL presented by SoFi is back with lights, cameras, action. We're talking big moments, big personalities, big names in the stands, all on the big screen. Big time matchups with shot clocks. Hammer drops timeouts, open overtime and playoffs. It's city versus city, squad versus squad. This sport just hits different under the lights. It's TGL, presented by SoFi.

[A]

Keep up.

[B]

It's golf. Tune in to every match. Only on ESPN.

[A]

But yeah. 105 dead bears in seven months. That was the winner of 1825 for Davey. And he killed one of them by stabbing.

[C]

Did he kill that many bears?

[D]

I mean.

[A]

I mean, he sold a lot of them. So he was always around town with his bears, like, hey, I got another bear.

[F]

I don't think it's that hard to kill a bear. And you tree them with dogs and then you shoot them out of the tree.

[C]

You tree them with dogs?

[F]

Yeah, dogs. Run them up into a tree because the bears are scared of the dogs.

[C]

I just never heard tree as a verb.

[A]

Oh, yeah, yeah. You can get a dog. Your dog will probably tree a squirrel for you at some point.

[C]

I'll ask him.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. What are the symptoms, Big T?

[D]

All your classics. Nausea, diarrhea, vomiting, abdominal pain, high fever, muscle pain, swelling of the eyelids, headache and weakness.

[A]

Yeah. So you're just sick.

[F]

I'm definitely feeling some weakness.

[A]

It just makes you sick.

[F]

I woke up this morning, I said, I got a lot of weakness today.

[A]

Must have been that bear I had.

[D]

Any eyelid swelling?

[F]

No, I don't think so.

[A]

So he. Yeah, he killed 105. I believe it. He was always out hunting. He shot most of them. So, yeah, he. He only claims that he stabbed one in the heart with a butcher knife, and that was in the pitch black. Pretty badass, though, if he did do that. So he was. He was a local bear hunter, meat salesman, oil provider. Then he ran for Congress in 1827, and he represented Western Tennessee. Then after he got reelected, the legend started to grow. There was a newspaper that called him an object of universal notoriety and reported that to return from the Capitol without having seen Colonel Crockett betrayed a total destitution of curiosity and a perfect insensibility to the lines of the West. So he was like a must see. He was like a tourist attraction. If you go to the Capitol, you have to stop by and see Davy Crockett. So they made a theatrical release called the lion of the West. And it came out in 1831 in New York City. And it boosted Crockett's fame internationally at that point.

[F]

And then he didn't get elected again. He got he got. He didn't get elected for that second term.

[A]

So he lost that reelection after becoming.

[F]

Like a. Yeah, because he was really outspoken on the. Andrew Jackson's Indian Replacement or Indian Removal Act.

[A]

Yeah.

[F]

He was against that.

[A]

So it made him kind of.

[F]

That was very unpopular. That's why he lost his seat. But then he got back in and that's why he.

[D]

Texas so.

[A]

Correct.

[F]

Yeah.

[A]

So it was. It was this portrayal of Crockett that started the coonskin cap as being the headwear of choice for him. But there was no, like, portrait. There was no written account that identified a coonskin capping Davy Crockett's headgear before 1835. So the first drawing of Davy Crockett is on the COVID of Davy Crockett's Almanac in 1837. It was in the play, but there was no. No reason. That was just like a. Maybe the actor's choice man by the name of James Hackett decided that he would wear the coonskin cap.

[F]

James Hackett went to Penn State where he also. They won the national championship. No.

[D]

They have won national championships.

[F]

It was such a. You're bad effort.

[D]

You're trying to do super bowl winning quarterback.

[F]

It's just an actor. That's all it is. But an actor. They're from before football, I think.

[D]

Yeah. And they have won national championships. They don't have a Super bowl winning quarterback.

[A]

I don't think I. I would say Burt Reynolds would have been the closest to ever. Ever doing the.

[C]

The double.

[D]

Both.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

The.

[A]

The egot of men.

[F]

Yeah.

[C]

You get.

[A]

You get the Oscar. What would that just be like? It'd be the.

[D]

The spo.

[A]

The spo.

[D]

Super Bowl Oscar.

[A]

Super Bowl Oscar.

[F]

Yeah.

[A]

I don't think anybody's ever.

[D]

What would be the EGOT for men if you win?

[F]

It's Super Bowl Eagle Scout, black belt.

[D]

Eagle Scout should be part of it.

[A]

Presidency.

[C]

What is the Eagle Scout? What is that?

[D]

It's the highest level you can attain in the Boy Scouts. And you have to do, like, a really big project for it. And it's. I think, like, a lot of presidents have been Eagle Scouts. It's like a big deal.

[F]

No, it would be. It would be Super Bowl, Medal of Honor.

[A]

Yeah.

[F]

You guys got to come up with the other two. That's all I got.

[A]

Yeah. I would say heart.

[E]

FIFA Peace Prize.

[F]

Oh, yeah. Yeah.

[A]

FIFA Peace Prize.

[D]

Thank you.

[A]

You get that you're good to go. And you get. If you're a billionaire, that would probably also be on, too.

[F]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

Done it all so yeah, he was not a coonskin cap guy whatsoever until they, they put him in the coonskin cap. And he's like, you know what? I kind of like, I'm going to cash in on this and I'm going to put it on the COVID of my almanac so everybody will know that this is, this is calling card. Good marketing on his part. So he, he started to really care about his public Persona after the, the play came out and he became a celebrity. And he gave really detailed instructions to anyone that was drawing his portrait. He said that there were too many portraits that made, made him look like a cross between a clean shirted member of Congress and a Methodist preacher. So he was posing for an artist by the name of John Gatsby Chapman. And he asked the port the artist to portray him rallying dogs during a bear hunt. He bought a bunch of outdoor props and insisted that he was shown holding up his cap ready to give a shout. That raised the whole neighborhood. So he understood the value of having people look at him as like the most manly men. And he said that his, he lacked political campaign funds, but he had a bunch of stories of his outdoor stuff that would improve his public standing and end up raising money for him anyway. So he was always out financed in his campaign and he would just make up for his lack of spending cash with making every appearance that he made noteworthy worthwhile. And he would just try to roast people. Candidates would travel town to town, they would try to give stump speeches and they would become very friendly. And they got well accustomed to each other's style. It was like politics. They'd talk about each other, but they enjoyed spending time with each other. One time, David Crockett memorized his opponent's speech. And he gave the same speech word for word to the assembled crowd. So the other candidate didn't have anything to say at that stop.

[F]

Oh, the, the be rabbit move.

[A]

The bee rabbit move. Yeah.

[C]

Although like am white, I am a bum. I do live in a trailer with my mom.

[F]

I wear a coonskin cap. Yeah, my gun's named old Betsy.

[A]

So on another occasion, Crockett was a guy that was famed for wearing upon his countenance a peculiarly good humored smile. So the guy smiled all the time. Crockett was worried that his opponent might get votes by grinning. He can outgrin me and you know I ain't slow. And to prove his prowess at grinning, he told his constituents how he had taken to grinning coons out of trees. I discovered a long time ago that A coon couldn't stand my grin. I could bring one tumbling down from the highest tree. I never wasted powder and lead when I wanted one of those creatures. He said he would just go up to a tree, smile at the raccoon.

[F]

The raccoon would just submit itself and untree it.

[A]

Untree itself? Yes. I submit to you.

[F]

D Tree.

[A]

D Tree. With nothing but the pearly whites.

[F]

Ditri oil.

[A]

So, yeah, he had that weird relationship with Andrew Jackson, like you said, Francis. They. They had a disagreement about the way that Andrew Jackson was handing the Indian Removal act. And I'm sorry for jumping the gun. No, no.

[F]

You're as excited to share what little knowledge I remembered.

[A]

You're 100. 100% right. So Crockett was a fierce advocate for the poor.

[C]

Now, would that have been woke? Big thing.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

I think it was unpopular at the time.

[C]

Would you call that woke?

[D]

No.

[F]

Why not?

[C]

Not woke. Okay.

[D]

Woke has a. A much more.

[C]

They don't. They don't know what the. It means.

[D]

He's big on this.

[F]

Oh.

[C]

I wouldn't be if y' all didn't.

[D]

You're the. You're the one that brings it up all the time.

[C]

I just want to continue and I've.

[D]

Told you, let's come up with a new word. I'm down to create a new word.

[C]

I am just doing it for the culture. I continually push the point.

[A]

I don't know.

[D]

But. But no. Disagreeing with a. Disagreeing with a policy is. Is not woke.

[F]

I think that. I think the extrapolation there, though, would be like to. To have empathy for the. The Native Americans. Empathy would have been seen as woke at that time.

[D]

I think some things that people call woke now is have. They have similar feelings to what people probably had then for this.

[F]

I see.

[C]

Well, I think it'd be relatively woke.

[D]

I think some people would call it that. I would not.

[C]

Gotcha.

[A]

He. What are you saying, Francis?

[F]

I don't even care.

[D]

You wanted.

[F]

You wanted what kind of people. But you're right. It doesn't matter what kind of people.

[D]

What?

[F]

I realized that the conversation had ended.

[A]

Okay.

[F]

And I didn't want to continue. Okay. Because it would have bored everybody.

[D]

Okay. I'm so. I'm lost.

[F]

It was on me. It was on me. I was like, ah, shit, that's done. Let's move back.

[A]

That's fair. Yeah, that's fair.

[C]

We love to beat dead horses on this show.

[A]

It is true. He was. He was against the Indian Removal Act. He said it was a wicked, unjust measure and he wanted to go against it and let the cost against me be what it might. He did speak on the floor of Congress in opposition to it, but he asked that his speech be taken out of the records because his constituents would have read it and got mad at him.

[D]

Is that a thing people did?

[C]

I don't know.

[D]

They would just go read the words of people in Congress and what they were talking about?

[A]

Yeah, I guess.

[D]

I guess before you had nightly news, you just go read what they were doing in Congress.

[A]

Yeah. So. So Davy Crockett lost the 1831 reelection. But in 1833, he got a one term stint as an anti Jacksonian. So he did not like Andrew Jackson, but he did help save his life. On January 30, 1835, Davy Crockett, Andrew Jackson were part of a crowd of lawmakers that were leaving the Capitol after a state funeral. As Jackson passed near the East Portico, a crazed gunman named Richard Lawrence emerged from a thong of supporters and shot at him with two pistols, both of which miraculously misfired. Old Hickory.

[C]

Hold on. Two pistols. Yosemite Sammy's doing this.

[A]

Yeah. And two clicks. Click, click, click, click, click.

[C]

With fucking Francis's revolver.

[F]

I was gonna say. Why do you think I'm only buying one?

[A]

Yeah, yeah. You don't want to be embarrassed by that. Also, revolvers, they shouldn't ever jam or misfire.

[F]

Right.

[A]

It's like old technology. That'll work.

[F]

Yeah.

[A]

So Jackson hit the guy, the assassin, with his cane, and then Crockett wrestled him to the ground and took his guns away.

[D]

That rocks, by the way.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

You get shot at and then you just take your cane and whack the guy.

[F]

Yeah.

[A]

Now that would be. That'd be a very. I, I think that's almost like a cool way to get beat up, is if you get your ass kicked by Andrew Jackson and Davy Crockett at the same time.

[F]

Yeah.

[D]

With a cane.

[A]

With a cane.

[D]

My great grandma had a cane. That was a sword.

[C]

Oh.

[A]

You could pull the top out of.

[D]

It through the canine. It was a sword.

[A]

Did she ever use it?

[D]

No, but she just thought it was cool.

[A]

That is cool.

[F]

That is cool. Concealed weapons.

[D]

That's sick.

[C]

So she just like flexed on y', all like, hey, yo.

[D]

Yeah, she, she. I, I remember when she got it, she was like, come look at this. And you, you take the cane out and it was a sword. It was awesome.

[C]

Compares like you around the corner says.

[D]

And it was so cool.

[F]

That is cool.

[A]

He. Davy Crockett was a. He was a complicated guy in terms of his beliefs. He was. He was an advocate for the poor, but he was also, like, kind of an advocate for some of the dirt bags out there. He would kind of couch it as saying that he's a big supporter of the common man. Andrew Jackson is not. Crockett believed in things like squatters rights. So he was really in favor of maintaining the rights of people to just, like, show up on land and be like, yeah, the czars now deal with it. He ran against the interests of the planters and the land speculators. Those were Jackson's big time backers. He said that the government ought to at least occasionally legislate for the poor. And people didn't really like that in D.C. that much.

[D]

He sounds like kind of an anarchist. Like, because he was such a sick hunter and outdoors means like, if I can just show up and take your shit, then it's mine.

[A]

He sounds like what Ron Swanson would like to be. Yeah, like Ron Swanson. He would like to be Davy Crockett. But also, every morning he wakes up and he has his moment of weakness where he puts on his shirt and goes to work for the state. Right, but.

[D]

So he can rot it from the inside, he says.

[A]

That's what he says. But I think he also likes a paycheck. David Crockett was just like you, you can all go to hell. And that's where he gave his. Maybe his most famous quote of all time. So he left Tennessee in 1835. He lost his bid for Congress, and he got to Texas in January. His old political rival Sam Houston was already in Texas to try to get all of his land and money back together. And Davey joined the Texas revolution. So he thought, maybe this will help my political career. But also, it sounds like a great adventure. So he swore an oath to the Republic of Texas and agreed to fight against Mexico. And in early February of 1836, he got to the Alamo. And just a couple days later, Santa Ana, they laid siege and they breached his outer walls. And Crockett, 200 other people died. They say that he might have fallen or he might have. He might have been shot in the.

[F]

Battle, but he killed 400 bears on the way.

[A]

Yeah, that's right. Left a trail of fur behind him. Trail of pelt, Trail of beers. Yeah. Spelled. Yeah. B, E, A, R, S. He. He gave a quote that said, you may all go to hell and I'll go to Texas. And that's how he quit politics, left D.C. and went down to Texas to fight pretty badass Quote, yeah, they love saying that down in Texas, but is.

[D]

It disparaging To Texas, you all may go to hell. I'll go to somewhere equal Texas.

[A]

I think he was mostly saying like, you guys can go to hell. I'm going to go fight.

[D]

Leave.

[A]

Yeah, you guys are. So some people have said that he got shot in battle. Some people say that he was captured and then executed by Santa Ana. There's a account that came out in 1955. They found a diary of Mexican officer named Jose Enrique de la Pena. And Pena said the naturalist David Crockett and six other Americans got captured by the Mexicans, presented to Santa Ana, who promptly had them killed. Crockett presented himself as a tourist who took refuge in the Alamo. He's like, I'm just on the riverwalk. I just kind of. I had to pee. So I walked into the Alamo. And then he pointed out that Crockett and the others died without complaining and without humiliating themselves before their tortures. I think I would probably complain. I would be a complainer.

[F]

I would do before I got executed. Oh, thirsty.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, Come on, man.

[F]

This tap water.

[A]

Do you have any sweaters? So, yeah, he did have guns named Betsy. That's the other thing about old Betsy, right? Yeah. So you always knew Old Betsy is like his, his rifle, right?

[F]

Mm.

[A]

Yeah. So he had two guns named Betsy. He got old Betsy, which was the.40 caliber flintlock that was given to him by his constituents in 1822. That's in a museum right now in San Antonio. And then in 1830, the Whig Society of Philadelphia gave him a gold and silver coated gun that he kept with him. He called that gun Fancy Betsy. So we got Betsy, and Fancy Betsy, that was named after Elizabeth Patton, which was his oldest sister. So he named his guns after his sister. Davy Crockett probably reached his pinnacle in terms of notoriety in the 1950s. That's when TV kind of made Davy Crockett into what we think now of Davy Crockett.

[D]

Real quick, I'm guessing that is probably the namesake of LZ Patton Middle School in Mount Juliet, Tennessee. Elizabeth Patton. That would pure speculation.

[A]

That would make sense.

[D]

Would have never. I. I've never come across the name.

[A]

Wait, so we've got two betsies in his life. His second wife was Elizabeth Patton. His older sister was also named Elizabeth, not Patton. I would assume Elizabeth Crockett. So we don't know, maybe one was regular Betsy, the other was Fancy Betsy. Yeah, there are two betsies in his life. So yeah, Walt Disney made a bunch of Davy Crockett TV shows in the 1950s. And that's where we kind of got the. The modern day image of Davy Crockett from. They sold 5,000 coonskin caps every day. Disney did. And the Ballad of Davy Crockett, which we sang for you earlier, was a. Was a staple of those TV shows, and they sold 10 million copies and was the number one song in America for 13 weeks. That's pretty cool. It's like Old Town Road and the Ballad of Davy Crockett, two of the. Two of the most prolific number one songs of the last.

[C]

I never heard that till y' all sung it.

[A]

That's kind of crazy. It was on.

[C]

Was it a TV show?

[A]

Yeah.

[F]

I mean, I never saw the TV show, but my dad would sing it to me.

[A]

So they. They wrote an essay in Texas Monthly, and it was from a writer that liked to tear down mythical figures and be like, well, he was a big. Well, actually guy that was like. His beat was finding stuff that people loved being. Well, actually, that thing that you like sucks. And in 1986, he did a deep dive into Crockett's biography, and he ended up being like, you know what? He's legit. Oh, like I. This is one guy that I. I respect. He said he's the rarest of American icons. A legendary hero who. Who turns out, after all, to have been more or less a decent, admirable human being. So shout out Davy Crockett. A real one. An absolute real one. He said he didn't kill a bear when he was three. Didn't care much for fighting Indians. Didn't look like Fess Parker. Didn't go down swinging Old Betsy at the Alamo. And he left his favorite rifle in Tennessee. And yes, it's true, he did surrender at the Alamo, but he was a good, decent human being and a legendary American.

[F]

Wow.

[D]

Amen. And his most famous contribution is now University of Tennessee mascot.

[A]

Go on.

[C]

Oh, really?

[D]

You know, the. The guy that runs around in the. The coonskin cap and the stabby.

[A]

I thought that Smokey was your mascot.

[D]

Smokey is the mascot, but there's a Davy Crockett master mascot as well.

[A]

You have a secondary mascot?

[D]

Yeah, he has a fake rifle and everything.

[C]

He's always at the games and even on some merch, like on some shirts. And there's a dude with the little hat with the raccoon thing sticking out the back.

[F]

Fancy mascot.

[C]

I never thought of anything of it.

[A]

I was not familiar with that. Yeah, so you've got. You've Got your musket mascot. And West Virginia has theirs, too.

[D]

Yeah, it's. It's basically the exact same guy.

[A]

He's the same guy.

[F]

Yeah.

[D]

I don't know if there's. I'm assuming theirs isn't supposed to be.

[A]

Davy Crocker Crockett, so the thing about the Davy Crockett Crockett mascot, though, like, what do you have to look like as a student to be eligible for that? What are they looking for?

[D]

I think you can be pretty much any male, really. I'm sure. I'm sure guys that look all sorts of ways have been it.

[A]

Because the mountaineer at West Virginia, he looks like the same guy over and over and over again.

[E]

Yeah, the leprechaun at Notre Dame.

[A]

Yeah, same thing. Yeah.

[D]

I guess you do have to have more of a specific look for those. I'm assuming there's been different looking Davy Crockett's. I'm not sure.

[A]

Francis, you have anything else about Davy Crockett?

[F]

I don't. And I've been summoned. Yeah.

[A]

You got to go.

[F]

I'm sorry.

[A]

All good.

[F]

That was really fun. Thanks for having me. Arian. Good to see you, man. I got one golf logo that I think if you don't have in your collection, you got to check out, which is Ohoopy Match Club down in Georgia. You got to get there.

[C]

Oh, be Match Club.

[F]

Yeah, it's an onion because it was built on an onion farm. It's the coolest logo in golf, I think. I think.

[C]

Thank you. I'll check that out.

[F]

You bet.

[A]

I'm looking at this Davy Crockett mascot you just sent over. Big T. That guy does not look like a rugged outdoorsman.

[C]

He definitely does not. He's got a lot of flair on his.

[F]

On his.

[C]

On his sweater there, too.

[A]

He looks like he's the.

[D]

That's Davy Crockett fringe.

[A]

Oh, they. Did he have that?

[F]

I don't know.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

Honestly, this is my first time really hearing about David Crockett, and I don't.

[D]

Really know that much, and. Pft. If you'll look, this year, we had a. Our smoky gray uniform had Davy Crockett fringe as part of it.

[A]

Is that what that is?

[D]

That's what it's supposed to represent.

[A]

You look like chevrons to me, but.

[D]

Yeah, but you see the vision, I guess.

[A]

No, I'm not buying that as Davy Crockett French. I'm not. I'm not. You should do it. Should have a tail, I guess. You should have that. The raccoon tail on the Back of the helmet.

[D]

That'd be sick.

[C]

It would.

[A]

I do like the coonskin cap. I think it's a nice piece of headgear that I would like to see make a comeback.

[D]

But he's on. Is he on the Mount Rushmore of Tennesseans? Because we did this once before. Dolly Parton. No question.

[A]

Dolly.

[D]

And are you putting Jack Daniels.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, Dolly, Jack Daniels, Davy Crockett, Justin Timberlake.

[D]

You really go, jt.

[A]

No, I wouldn't. I'm just trying to think who else is from Tennessee.

[D]

I mean, you've got Kenny Chesney.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Elvis is really from Mississippi.

[A]

Yep. You've got. I guess you could say Peyton kind of.

[D]

No, no. Because when we did this before, did we do Oprah?

[C]

Famous people from Tennessee.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

Yeah. I think Oprah is from Nashville.

[A]

If Oprah's from Nashville, then I think you put her on there. You have to.

[D]

Or maybe she lived there for a short period of time.

[A]

I'm seeing Aretha Franklin is from Tennessee.

[C]

Oh, okay. On there.

[A]

Yeah. Queen of Soul, Tina Turner, I would say. Oh, Morgan Freeman.

[C]

Morgan Freeman.

[D]

I thought he was from Mississippi.

[F]

Mississippi.

[A]

I'm seeing. He was born in Memphis.

[D]

Okay. He might. He might have lived, like, on the border.

[A]

Charlie Daniels.

[D]

Freeman was raised in Mississippi.

[C]

Quentin Tartillo was born in Knoxville. I didn't know that.

[D]

Really?

[A]

Oh, Bill Belichick, born in Nashville.

[D]

That's right. He's talked about that.

[C]

My man's hit me and said he didn't. They didn't get him for first ballot hall of Famer.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

That's kind of wild.

[A]

Yeah. I hate it. What did the.

[C]

Did the voters say why they don't.

[A]

There's. We're still working through that right now. We don't have perfect information of what was said inside that room, but the speculation is that it was Bill Polian who was the GM of the Bills for a long time and then the GM of the Colts for a long time. He was a leading figure. And pressing Bill Belichick on Deflategate and all that stuff, the speculation and, like some sourcing has said that Bill Polian made it known that he doesn't think Belichick is a first ballot hall of Famer and that he should be like, almost as punishment for all those scandals, should be that he doesn't get in on the first ballot. But then somebody got Bill Polian on the record to talk afterwards, and he said, no, I think he should be a Hall of Famer. And I'm pretty sure I voted for him. That to me says, I don't think Bill Polian actually voted for him. Yeah, you would remember if you didn't. Like, if you vote for Belichick, does.

[C]

He have the most super wins all time?

[A]

Yes. He's the best coach that's ever coached, and it's ridiculous that he's not in on the first bell. And like, even Patriots haters are out there. Like, yes, this is a disgrace, what you've done to Bill. I feel.

[C]

Yeah, I don't.

[A]

I feel bad for Bill Belichick.

[C]

I like New England at all. But of course.

[D]

So he needed 60 out of 70 votes. Is that right? Or 70 out of 80. It was something like that. I'm guessing There were probably 13 people who were like, I'm going to vote no.

[C]

I don't give a fuck about that shit.

[D]

So that when he gets in 69 to 1, I can say I was the guy that. And here's why. There were too many of them.

[C]

I was doing a radio show with a dude that voted. He had a vote on the all Pro team, and it was 2011, and I missed, like two or three games because I had a hamstring pool. But I was like, in my prime, I was like, clearly one of the best in the league. And I was. I just wanted to pick his Brad. I was like, why. Why did you not vote me first team? Because I think I got second team all pro that year. He was like, yeah, Lashawn just played better. I said, in what way? Like, I was just, like, picking his brain to see if he knew football. Like, how did he play? But he's like, he had more touchdowns than you. I was like, yeah, you don't know what you. I was like, bro, you know, they.

[A]

Don'T know what they talking about.

[C]

Most of them that is bought.

[A]

Yeah. They fall back on stats a lot.

[C]

And there's like a first battle hall of Famer. Get the out of here, bro.

[A]

Yeah. I think Big T might be in.

[C]

The hall of Fame. Fuck them.

[A]

I think Brian Mitchell should be in the hall of Fame.

[C]

Who's that?

[A]

He was a running back. Kick returner for no. Brian Mitchell.

[C]

Oh, Brian Mitchell should be in there. Of course he is. Top three. Top.

[D]

Yeah.

[C]

Top three return of all time.

[A]

I think he might be top three or top two in terms of total yardage. He was a great running back, too.

[C]

Yeah, man.

[A]

Yeah, it is. I think Big T might be right, though. I think you might have had too many of the guys that are. Are saying I voted against him out of principle, even though I think he. Obviously, he's a Hall of Famer. I just want to let America know that I disapproved of his scandals.

[D]

Baseball does this. Like, there's only been two or three unanimous first ballot, right? I think Mariano was the first one. Yeah, Jeter was Jeter.

[A]

I don't think Jeter was. I could be wrong about that.

[D]

There's. But there's only been a couple, and it's these guys who are like, I'm not gonna do it. Just so it. This guy doesn't get unanimous.

[A]

Yeah.

[D]

It's like, okay, dude, like, whatever.

[A]

Belichick should obviously be in the hall of Fame. And this does feel like great, great fodder for the Patriots being like, it's us against the world again.

[D]

They're absolutely gonna win with this news.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. I did take Big T's advice.

[D]

You hedged?

[A]

Well, I talked to Hank about it, and Hank, he didn't initially want to do double or nothing, mostly because he would have felt uncomfortable taking $80,000 from me, which I understand. Like, that's a lot of money to pay your friend.

[D]

So it's 40.

[A]

40 a lot, too. So I talked.

[C]

Don't bet it. Don't bet it.

[A]

So I talked to Hank, and we kind of negotiated this a little bit. I said I would put $40,000 on the Patriots money line in the super bowl, and if they win, I'll pay you 80,000. I'll keep the rest, which would end up being, I think 38 is what it came down to. And I would keep that. And Hank was like, well, what does that do? And I'm just like, well, if the Patriots lose, at least you get the satisfaction of knowing that I lost $40,000. And Hank was like, okay, yeah, let's do it. So I guess I'm. The crazy thing about this is I think $40,000 is worth it for the Patriots to not win a Super Bowl. I feel like that's a good deal for me.

[C]

Hey, yo, that is some rich pft.

[A]

But it's also like, I don't. I don't need them to be happy again. They've been so happy. They've had enough happiness.

[C]

My man's is betting so the Patriots don't win a Super Bowl. That is hilarious.

[A]

Let the seahawks. I'm paying $40,000 into a victory fund for the Seahawks.

[D]

That's.

[A]

That's the way I'm looking at it. Like, I'm the biggest Seattle Seahawks supporter that there is.

[C]

You gotta win money where we're gonna. I'll See Hawk Birch on a Super bowl day?

[A]

I might. I might. I'm rooting for the 12s. All right, anything else we want to get into today?

[C]

Nope. Just starting season 15 of Project Runway.

[A]

Aaron, I don't know your. Your personal status right now in terms of relationships, but I do know that single. Single. Okay.

[C]

There's a lot of Mac auntie to hit me.

[A]

There's a that. We got a lot of dating shows coming out. Have you thought about going on Love is Blind?

[C]

No, I'm too old. I'm too old for that.

[E]

You're not, but love is too good of a person.

[A]

They're doing Ohio.

[E]

I know. They're doing Columbus, by the way, will.

[D]

Y' all tell me about this show Traitors? So it's basically just a game of Werewolf on a television show.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

Traders is Fire.

[D]

That seems like a show that you could.

[C]

I would love to. I would love to.

[E]

He can't lie on television.

[A]

Television, yeah.

[E]

You can't lie, and you have to.

[F]

Lie in that show.

[E]

Yeah. I don't know if that's meant for you.

[C]

I' ma try to play a fair game, dog.

[E]

Unfortunately, that will get you out very early.

[C]

Got me out on barstool.

[E]

I know. Think about NBC.

[F]

Yeah.

[C]

And a bunch of people still to this day, like, oh, you're such a good guy. Yeah, I am.

[A]

The.

[C]

Oh, you won't lie. Yeah, the.

[A]

We got to get you on. I. I mean, Love is Blind is great. Trash tv, isn't it? Are we out? Are we out on it?

[C]

No, I'm in. I'm in.

[E]

Yeah.

[C]

I wouldn't. I wouldn't go on it because I'm not gonna. I'm not gonna fall in love. Like. No. So, you know, I don't want to take a pot from somebody who's really out there trying to bust them old bruh 39. I'm trying to.

[E]

I feel like if you could get over your fear of lying on television, you would be really good at Traders.

[C]

It's not a fair. It's just, like, it's really.

[F]

Who.

[C]

I don't. I keep it a bean.

[E]

I know you do, but I can't. How could it be if you didn't keep it a bean and you just lied?

[C]

It would bother me. Like, it bothers me. Like, because it bothers me when other people do it. So, like, it would. I could.

[A]

I can't.

[C]

I can't sit with myself. It's a me thing. Like, I just. I don't know.

[E]

I think you'd be good at it. I think.

[C]

I think so too.

[E]

Aryan with like Lisa Rinna or a housewife would be good. Television, not dating. I'm just saying going up against she's happily married. Happily married Harry Hamlin.

[C]

Who's gonna look at her?

[E]

She is a real housewife of Beverly Hills and a soap actress.

[A]

I would like to have you on a dating show, Aaron. That'd be very funny.

[E]

What's a different dating show that he could like? What's another one that.

[C]

See what we can do.

[A]

Golden Bachelor. How old are the Golden Bachelor?

[E]

Maybe it's a bachelor. Aryan's Bachelor. But the contestants are Golden Bachelor.

[C]

Oh, that would be fire. Looking for a little coug.

[E]

They gotta switch up the format of the Bachelor anyway.

[A]

So is there a show out there like that?

[E]

I don't think so.

[A]

There should be.

[C]

There should. Like where a middle aged man is looking for an older woman.

[D]

Yeah.

[E]

I mean fuck it. The Yakta is a dating show. Why don't we just do it ourselves?

[C]

Yeah, I'm in.

[E]

I mean if the act can make a dating show, why can't we?

[A]

Give us your pitch area.

[E]

Why should a 62 year old woman.

[A]

Date you Give us the age range and then give us the reason. Why? Why they would be interested in you and what you're looking for.

[C]

45 to 55. Why? Why should they be interested in me? Because I'm still young enough to have a good time. I don't need nothing from you. I got my own. I like to think I'm handsome. I can have a conversation. But you want to talk about politics, you want to talk about science, you want to talk about reality tv. I'm just.

[A]

I'm versatile.

[C]

I'm versatile. I'm articulate, I'm kind, I'm compassionate. I got kids. We don't need kids. You know, Great father.

[A]

He's putting that smooth voice on right now.

[C]

Why, why wouldn't you give me a shot? Did I just. Did I just. Did I just woo you?

[D]

Pft.

[C]

Did it work? I'm wooed.

[A]

I'm so. I'm so wooed.

[E]

Oh my God.

[A]

I love kids. We can talk about anything you want. We can go there. You want to go.

[C]

There we go. We could go there.

[A]

Come on.

[D]

Come on.

[C]

Boo. I used to watch I Love Lucy with my moms. I could watch Love Island. Now it's whatever. Any range of things that you want to do, I could do.

[A]

You got a great relationship with your mom. I feel like that's important for foreign.

[C]

Mom'S one of my best friends. Good Relationship with my dad. You know, a leader. I know what I want to do, know who I want to be. I've been to therapy. Emotionally intelligent, compassionate. I hold the door open for you if that's your thing. But if you want to be independent and take things into your hands, let you do you. You need a night out with your ladies. I gave you space. Come on now.

[D]

Would you let. Would you let a woman pay for herself on a first date if she was like, insisting to.

[C]

Absolutely.

[D]

Oh, that's crazy.

[C]

I respect that. You can't.

[D]

You can't let that happen.

[C]

I disagree. See, this is what this is. This is. This is. This is the emotionally intelligent part. If you don't want me to do that, don't play games.

[A]

Tell me you're respected. 100.

[C]

If you want to pay, go ahead.

[A]

But also, you'd have no problem paying. You. You want to pay.

[C]

Hey, I'm a man that's done well for myself. You know, I can pay for dinner and a lot more. It's nothing to get to dinner. But baby girl, if you want to get to dinner, follow me. You know, I think I got you, Eric.

[A]

I got you. Yeah, I'm, I'm, I'm wooed, I'm swooned. I'm all the ooze. No, I. I think that, that Aaron would be a catch. Ironic for a running back that didn't have very good hands, but it would be, it would be also pretty low.

[D]

Awareness on this year's NCAA football.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Wow. Because I had, like, top tier hall of fame vision. Wow.

[D]

Did you know you were going to be in that?

[C]

I don't know. Every now and then. Like, my, the kids that I coached, they were like, hey, did you know you were in the blue? I still don't even know what it is. I don't even know what that is. I don't, I don't play. No.

[D]

But I assume you would have had to get a check for it.

[C]

Yeah. A while back my team called me and say so and so wants. Ea wants to rights or something.

[D]

Yeah. So they probably have your rights for five years or something.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And I told them, you know, double it. And they said, oh, we ain't gonna do it again. Then they came back and said, okay, I don't know. I don't know about it.

[D]

Yeah, you're in the, in the college football game this year, which I barely even played. It was a real letdown after last year.

[C]

But shout out to me.

[D]

Yeah, thank you. We're in 91.

[C]

I'll take it, baby. You know?

[D]

But then some cards, they come back in the off season, and, like, you might get a 99 later. I don't know.

[C]

You know, ain't no telling, man. I was. I was a better pro than I was a collegiate athlete.

[A]

All right, well, let's get this dating show. Let's. Let's get it going. If not here, there's got to be a reality show out there that would, you know, do. Do quite well with this premise.

[C]

I agree.

[A]

Also, you make entertaining television. You're an entertaining guy. So can be.

[C]

Can be.

[A]

Yeah. Where would you want it to be set?

[C]

Somewhere tropical. Go.

[A]

Okay.

[C]

Bora Bora.

[A]

Where's that from?

[C]

Island. Okay. You never heard of Bora Bora?

[A]

I have. I just don't know where it is. I couldn't find it on a map.

[D]

Asia adjacent.

[C]

Yeah, I mean, I couldn't find on a map either, but I just seen pictures, and I want to go.

[A]

Okay. Oceana.

[D]

Yeah, I'm guessing it's near Indonesia. Mad Dog, are you looking that up?

[C]

Pull it up, Jamie.

[E]

French Polynesia.

[A]

Okay. South Pacific.

[C]

South Pacific.

[A]

You know, be very nice.

[C]

Be very nice with some beautiful ladies looking for love.

[A]

You know, finding your queen. Do we have a. Do we have any ideas about the title of the show?

[C]

Run it back.

[E]

The Silver Crown.

[C]

Ooh.

[A]

Run it back.

[D]

That actually does kind of work.

[A]

Yeah, Run it back. It works on so many different levels.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, for the.

[A]

For the lady, for me. For you. You were a running back.

[C]

Ah, that was the play. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah, that's good. I like it. All right, run it back with Arian Foster. Let's get you love.

[C]

Let's get somebody else love out there, too, you know?

[A]

There you go. That's why. That's why they should want to be in the Aryan Foster business. Good business to be someone who tickle my butt every night before I go to sleep.

[C]

Not tickle.

[A]

Rub my butt. Rub.

[C]

See, I'm doing all the freaky stuff, which, hey, we don't kink shame. No, I'm not into the butt tickle.

[A]

Rub my butt like it's a brisket.

[C]

Rub my butt while I scroll on social media.

[A]

There we go. And you'll rub her butt too, won't you?

[C]

She wants that.

[A]

There we go. Class action. All right, we will see you guys next week on nano dosing. I'm gonna be at the Super Bowl. I'm gonna be in. In California. And what was that, Arnold? California.

[C]

Okay. I was like, what the.

[A]

Was that the governor of California? All these girly men in Sacramento. Yeah.

[C]

Everybody get down.

[A]

Get to the chopper. Love you guys.

[C]

It's not a tumor.

[A]

Let off some steam. Love you guys.

[C]

Bye.

[D]

Goodbye.