It's been two and a half years since I announced my separation and divorce on the podcast, and in this personal episode, I finally sit down to give the update I promised myself I'd share. What took so long? The answer, it turns out, is the very story I continue to tell… one of profound transformation, spiritual reckoning, and slowly coming home to myself.

This episode is an honest, unscripted look at what a midlife awakening can actually look like from the inside. I walk through the intersection of perimenopause, my Chiron return in Aries, the end of my marriage, and the slow dismantling of long-held beliefs about myself and my life. I share five powerful relationship self-assessment questions, reflect on the mind-body connection between suppressed needs and physical illness (drawing from Dr. Gabor Maté's work), and speak directly to women who are in that uncertain, frozen place of not-yet-knowing what to do about their relationship. The throughline of the episode is this: follow the breadcrumbs, even when you can't see where they lead.

Key takeaways from this episode:

The five relationship self-assessment questions:

If someone told you that you're a lot like your partner, would that feel like a compliment?
Are you truly fulfilled in your relationship, or are you just less lonely?
Are you able to be unapologetically yourself in your relationship, or do you feel you have to show up differently to please or accommodate your partner?
Are you in love with your partner as they are right now — as a whole — or are you in love with their good side, their potential, or your idea of them?
Would you want your child (real, future, or imagined) to date someone like your partner?

The Chiron Return is an astrological transit in your late 40s to early 50s when the "wounded healer" planet returns to the position it occupied at your birth — and for those of us born between 1969–1976, it tends to arrive boldly and intensely.
The mind-body connection is real — drawing from Dr. Gabor Maté's When the Body Says No, I highlight research linking higher rates of autoimmune disease and non-smoking-related cancers to chronically suppressing your own needs in a relationship.
There are two very different kinds of easy — life can be logistically easier inside a relationship while quietly depleting you spiritually and physically, and it's worth asking which one you're actually experiencing.
Midlife awakenings take longer than we expect — mine stretched across nearly a decade of incremental ruptures before I finally made the decision to leave my marriage in 2023.
You are not alone — whether you're in the questioning stage, the frozen stage, or somewhere further down the road, it's all a normal and valid part of the journey.
Follow the breadcrumbs — encouragement to ask smaller, more honest questions that move you incrementally forward toward the clarity you need.

This episode is an invitation to anyone in the middle of their own becoming. Whether that looks like questioning a relationship, navigating midlife, or simply feeling the foundation shift beneath your feet like I did. My message is clear: what looks like falling apart is often falling open. The breadcrumbs are there. Keep following them.

Resources:

Ep 540: Leaving My Marriage from July 2023

TikTok I mentioned that has those 5 questions

When the Body Says No by Gabor Maté

Single session to have your birth chart read. (P.S. I made a mistake in the episode when I said the price. Instead of pulling the episode and changing it, I will grant 5 people the discounted rate I mentioned at the end of episode 720. Once they are all booked, those discounted sessions will be gone and the regular price applies!)

Book recommendations:
I love a good personal development book, and you do too, right? I’ve compiled a list of book recommendations, as mentioned in past episodes. Check out these amazing book recommendations here. Happy reading!

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