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Dr. J.C. Dornick (1:05)

So here's the reality your brain My brain is a prediction making machine. It takes past experiences, turns them into a blueprint and a story about who you are. If you're not careful, that story becomes what we call our identity. Have you noticed that the world that we live in has been doing most of the thinking for you? That your beliefs, perceptions, reactions, fears and doubts have been shaped by unsolicited outside noise? How easy it's been for you to slip into that default sleep walking mode and label it as life and reality. Yeah, that ends here. Welcome to the make sense with Dr. JC podcast. This is your opportunity to start thinking for yourself, reclaim control, and step back into that role as the shock caller and dominant force of your own reality. It's when you change the way that you look at things that the things that you look at begin to change. So let's wake up, let's rise, eyes up, and let's make sense of why and how shift happens. Makes sense. Welcome everybody. Great morning. Great morning humans. Great morning world. My name is Dr. J.C. dornick, otherwise known as the Dragon, and I want to welcome you to another edition of the make sense with Dr. JC podcast. So today we are going to talk about the following topic. I call this the three word phrase that ends feeling stuck. How to change your life. At this time, it's about Arming yourself with the awareness and the awakening of something that already is happening, that we very often lose sight. So we're going to talk about the three words that can instantly change the way that you see yourself. Your past, and your future. Because the truth is you may be trapped right now in a lie that you once told yourself about who you are and what you think reality is. So if you think about it, we say things like, I'm not good at that. Think about these statements and just realize that when we make statements about ourself or about reality, we have this tendency of, without even knowing it, putting exclamation points, meaning it's this and nothing else. And this is a very interesting challenge that we have, because sometimes we have things that we've been brought up to believe are the way that they are. And, you know, I love to say that what you see is what you get, but it doesn't mean that it's necessarily what actually is. So we say things like, I'm not good at that, or I'm always anxious, or, I've always been that way. This is just who I am. I remember another part of my book when I was confronted in chapter seven by my first mentor, and he was asking me what I think people think about me. And I remember I had a pretty strong opinion about that. It was something like, well, half the people like me and the other half don't. And he says, well, what do you think about that? And I said, well. Well, this is who I am. Them. So that was one of the awakenings. And in my new book, I'm going to highlight that a little bit more. But those exclamation points and those statements that we believe are fact, what if they're not? What if the three simple words that I'm going to share with you today could break you free from that cage, that prison, instantly and shift you from a conditional Elephant on a chain. Do you guys know what an elephant on a chain is? There's this big, mighty elephant that's in a zoo that has this teeny little chain around one of its feet, and all it would really need to do is just slightly flick its foot and break that chain. But it's been conditioned to believe that that chain is holding it back. So are you an elephant on a chain to that idea of allowing yourself to be open and curious and become a possibility thinker that begins to take note of the abundant opportunities that are available to us all throughout our life. So today we're going to explore the power of this following Phrase. And these are the three most powerful words that I've ever learned and arms, myself and put in my toolbox. Those three words are this time, and by the end of this conversation, what we're going to do is we're going to show you how those three words can help you revisit your past. I know we're taught not to do that. Also, release yourself from regret and begin aligning your life with what actually matters most for you. When at this time, let's talk about the lie of permanent identity. So most people. And when I say most people, I'm not referring to others. I'm part of that. Most people unknowingly imprison themselves. So we do it to ourselves with permanent identities. And I can understand why, you know, we're always trying to create some sort of a strong foundation. It's the very nature about why we have political views and religious views and things like that. It's all about creating a strong foundation to stand on. You know, it's very scary to not have an identity. Sometimes we go through what's called an identity crisis. And what I've learned from my life is that's actually a good thing. But we have this tendency of creating these permanent identities, and people believe that their thoughts are facts. So that's a big distinction, is when you assess four of the 40 to 70,000 thoughts that flow through your head and you call them facts, or maybe you look at your emotions and consider them to be the truth. Sometimes we get our thoughts and emotions mixed up with checking with our heart and our gut, and we assess them and we determine that they're the truth. And we also make this assessment that the past is fixed. Well, one of the chapters in our book called the Lifeline, and we'll touch on it today, shows us that if you can learn how to look at your past through the lens that you have now, you're much more conscious and aware person right now. You have a lot more life experience. And if you're with us today and you're practicing the interface response system, you've also evolved as a person, as a more conscious human being, one that has the ability to kind of step into that open and curious space and look at things differently, maybe look at things from alternative vantage points. So if you go back and you look at your past events and recognize that who you were at that time was the reason why you saw it and reacted that way, and that's fine, right? But you're different now. So here's the reality. Your brain My brain is a prediction making machine. It takes past experiences and what it does is it turns them into a blueprint and a story about who you are. So what that's saying is, is we'll take our past experiences and we'll formulate a blueprint and accept it wholeheartedly as who we are. Now, if you're not careful, that story becomes what we call our identity. So if we're buying into a past story about ourselves, the danger is, is that that very much becomes our identity. And this is why people say things like, I'm just not confident, I'm bad at relationships. Sometimes we say, I'm not a business person, I'm not disciplined. Think about all these words and statements, exclamation points that we say about ourselves. Or how about this one? I always start strong and I never follow through. You know, I'm a health transformation coach and I've been doing that for 20 years. And I have my own experience. You know, I lost 80 pounds and I woke up and transformed my life. And what I learned from that is that it's on a healthy body that a healthy mind rests. I also learned how to let go of my story. A lot of the things that I used to say that I was not good at and affirm that I was not good at were based on me believing my past story. And the moment that those statements become permanent, what happens in that moment is growth stops. We put limitations on ourselves. But when you add those three words at this time or when you learn to start practicing that, you see, you can't just say, I'm going to do that from now on, because you have a condition programmed stress response system, and it's engineered for survival. So it's like this 200,000ton oil tanker that's going in one direction, the same direction it always does with its thoughts and its feelings and its perceptions and its reactions. And now all of a sudden you're just going to tap on the captain that is steering that ship and say, hey, we're going to go a different way. It's not that easy. So you have to start practicing. In my book I talk about this concept of praction, which is the combination of practice and action. And that's just the acknowledgement when you first start doing something like instilling these three magic words at the end of a sentence, rather than making it a statement, making it therefore temporary, you're going to have to think about that. So that's why I always invite people to just go every time you have an idea or you have a perception, or you have this knee jerk reaction, or you have this feeling or thought about something before you react, just say as a reminder. That means haven't made up my mind yet. But what it's doing is, is it's putting your knee jerk reaction and your perceptions of things which are programmed and conditioned and they might still be good, but we're just putting them on pause and we're stepping into this space and that's where you can remind yourself to try something like saying at this time or putting at the end of a sentence. So when you do that, something magical happens. And I like magical things. I'm not confident turns into I'm not confident at this time. I'm struggling at this time. I'm really overwhelmed at this time. So suddenly that identity transforms from permanent to temporary. So just park there for a second. The whole concept of saying this too shall pass would be the acknowledgment that everything changes over time. But if you can't say that and you can't believe that, that's because your identity says that something is permanent, maybe about you, about somebody else. That's a big one too, is sometimes I'll make statements with exclamation points about other people that they'll never change, they can never change. But now what I do is I say, at this time, there's somebody that can never change. But that means that it goes from permanent to temporary. I just love that that tiny little shift creates something powerful. And I call it psychological freedom. I love the idea of psychological freedom. And here's why this matters a lot in 2026. So one of the biggest reasons that people feel stuck today is that life and technology and all of the advancements and the decisions made by the higher ups is moving faster, faster than our identity can adapt. That's a big statement right there. That means that my identity does not have the ability to evolve and keep pace with how fast life is changing. So we're all living through massive life transitions all the time that we can't keep up with if we're closed circuit and we don't have the ability to be open and curious. That's why I love to be open and curious, because it helps me go along with things and not miss some potential like big, big breakthroughs or distinctions that I can make. So careers change, technology is evolving. Like I said, the digital world is constantly pulling at our attention. If you're focused on any of this crypto and blockchain and AI and virtual reality, and all that stuff, you're either closed to that or you can take note that it's happening no matter what. And it's moving way faster than we can comprehend. There's no way that you can learn everything every day and keep pace. But what you can do is shift from permanent to temporary. And that's a wonderful relief and feeling. So careers change, technology, the digital world, which is why so many people are considering things like a digital detox right now. We very often are saying, I'm going to do a fast on technology or a fast from social media. We think about things called mindful productivity. Right now I'm going to take a detox and I'm going to do something that is productive for my mind and, and start working on intentional habits. Some of the biggest books out there about habit change require that you stop doing something and you put intention and focus on something else. So this is proof that we see how fast the world is moving. We have to kind of take a step back from it and not care so much about it. Which is what my next book is about. Deciding what to care about. People are kind of seeking and craving rewired wellness now and brain wealth. I love that concept of brain wealth. One of my best friends for 25 years is Jim Quick and he talks a lot about brain health. And I always like to insert brain wealth. And that's just not survival. That's a whole different thing. People want to actually feel like their life belongs to them again. That's the whole essence of the make sense ecosystem. And when you read this book, that's what it's about. It's about arming and equipping yourself with the awareness of this stuff and taking some strategic strategies and tools and exercises and implementing them in our lives. And we've been talking a little bit about that. And that is to reclaim control of things as what? As the dominant force and shock caller of your reality and your life. So in order to do that, you have to reclaim control and realize that you get to make choices. But if you don't recognize some of these permanent identities that we have because we don't know how to just say, well, that's right now. And open ourselves up to the temporariness of. But I don't know about the future. I love saying I don't know now. I could have a pretty good idea and I could have a feeling and a thought about something and I could experience what's called certainty. But I like to even throw a I don't know or maybe something else might be true. And that's the art of living like a scientist. And the first step in this process is permitting yourself to take a personal exploration of yourself. Think about what that means, taking a personal exploration of yourself. This just means asking questions like, who am I now? Who am I now? Because very often who you are right now is different than who you've always been. Who am I now? I like to recognize that I've changed. Sometimes other people have to help me remember how I've changed. Not who you were, not who society told you to be, but who are you now at this time? Can you recognize how much you've evolved and shifted as a person? Totally different? It's miraculous. I want to insert something from chapter two in my book, and this is a powerful chapter that very often people struggle to make sense of. So I'm going to try to give it to you in a real simple way. But it's an exercise and it's a tool that gives you a different way of looking at life that really, really validates the. The whole at this time concept. So at this time is a tool to help you understand this. And looking at your life on what we call the lifeline is something that works perfectly in partnership with the concept of at this time. So in chapter two of Makes Sense, I introduce a technique called the lifeline exercise. Real simple. You could take a piece of paper and do this, or you could just imagine it in your head. I want you to just consider drawing a line across a piece of paper or just looking at a line that moves from left to right. Okay? Now, to the far left of that line is the day that you were born. And I mean that you actually went online and became conscious. If you're somebody that believes that consciousness begins in the womb, that's fine. You could put that there. But it's birth. And then on the far right of the line, that would be death. Now, for the sake of this explanation, just to give you a numeric thing, because I'm going to show you where to place yourself now. So if birth is on the left and death is on the right, let's use the average current life expectancy combined between men and women. Women have a tendency of living longer than men, but worldwide, right now, the average life Expectancy is about 73 years old. Okay, now we have some people in here that are older than 73. So congratulations, you're defying the average. Just take note that averages are just silly. But this is just for this exercise, so you could take whatever you believe your Life expectancy will be and put it at the far right. Now, I want you to take your current age and identify where it is. So if you're going to live till 73, hypothetically, or whatever you put there, and you were born at this time, your current age would be. I mean, you can look at the middle as the 50 yard line and just put your current age there. Once you do that, you begin to mark the major life experiences and events that have happened. So the first thing I want you to do is identify how long you have been alive at this time. Right now. Remember, one of the questions was, who am I now? So this is one element of who you are now. You are somebody that has been alive and experienced life for a certain amount of time in the grand scheme of things. So I'm 54, so I'm 65, 75% of the way there. So I can put my place there and I can identify how long I've been alive. And that gives me the ability now, almost like a timeline of sorts, to go back and take all events that have transpired in your life. I talk about these events very often in my book, but I had to go through the lifeline exercise to be able to say, my parents got divorced during this time. I started school, I had my first girlfriend at this time. I got married, I got divorced at this time. A friend died at this time. Some big, big life events, but I put them on the lifeline and I'll explain why that's important. Your childhood, your teenage years, relationships, careers, moments, you know, traumas, breakthroughs, any moment that shaped you, okay? We typically look at those moments and we say things like, I can't believe that I did that. I should have known better. Oh, man, that event, that person ruined me. It ruined everything. They ruined my life. That wasn't fair. So that's the way we typically look at our past, which makes sense. Everybody's taught to just drop their past, right, because their past is no longer relevant. Right now this is a little bit of a different look at it. Because the truth is this. We're judging our past selves based on the awareness that you have now. You're different now. So when you look at your past and say, I should never have done that before, only the version of who you are now would have been able to not do that thing. But if you look at who you were at that time on the vectors of this lifeline, and you know, that's the experience and how long you've been alive, if you're an 11 year old kid, you don't have the ability to look at life the way you do now. So that's going to give you a little bit of empathy for that and say, oh, that makes sense why I reacted. But then also your level of consciousness. Remember, you've evolved as a person. So that's the other vector. You're either above or below the line. You're either a radically responsible, open and curious person or you're a victim of circumstance. You're closed circuited. You're not open because you have a permanent identity. You're putting exclamation points. So that's one of the keys. The moment that you take a permanent stance on something and you validate that you're standing for something, at the same time you're closing yourself to growth. You're saying nothing else is allowed in. So those are the vectors that you look at on the line. And this now gives you the ability to look back at something that happened to you and acknowledge first that that happened at that time and you were different at that time. Isn't that fun? So there's the validation of starting to recognize that everything is happening at that time or at this time. That's a power move. That's a very big power move. And when you begin looking at your past through that empathetic understanding lens, which is logical, something amazing happens. Remember, Wayne Dyer says, if you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change, okay. And I think everybody embraces that. But it's hard to execute on. Once again, that's what the book is for. This book will help you execute on that. But what happens when you start to look at that and acknowledge who you were at that time, who you are at this time? Compassion replaces judgment. You stop judging and you start to have empathy. And compassion, understanding replaces shame. If you're having shame for something that's happened in your life, or even blame, understanding is a powerful thing. Very often we'll look at some of the things that we blame our parents or our friends or co workers or anything like that. And we never take the time to understand what might have been going on in their life at that time. So that gives rise to the ability to forgive.