So Nice, We Had To Argue Twice (Post Election Part 2)

Summary

Summary of "So Nice, We Had To Argue Twice (Post Election Part 2)"

Podcast: Marriage and Martinis
Hosts: Danielle & Adam
Release Date: November 18, 2024

Introduction and Post-Election Reflections

In this episode, Danielle and Adam revisit the aftermath of the recent election, addressing the emotional and relational strains it has imposed on their marriage. Danielle shares her fatigue from navigating political discussions and the intense feedback from listeners, while Adam reflects on the challenges of addressing political topics within their show.

Notable Quotes:

• Danielle [01:25]: "Exhausted."
• Adam [02:48]: "We were just kind of discussing the after effects for us."

Media Consumption and Its Impact on Marriage

A significant portion of the episode focuses on the couple's differing views on media consumption. Danielle expresses concern over Adam's engagement with male-dominated podcasts and media personalities like Joe Rogan and Charlie Kirk, which she believes perpetuate harmful narratives towards women. Adam defends his choices, stating that he consumes such content primarily for entertainment and intellectual stimulation, not endorsement.

Notable Quotes:

• Danielle [09:07]: "Nick Fuentes says, 'your body, my choice.'"
• Adam [12:03]: "What difference."

Discussion on Specific Personalities and Their Influence

Danielle and Adam delve into the influence of specific media figures. Danielle criticizes Joe Rogan for providing a platform to far-right personalities and spreading misinformation, particularly regarding women's rights and transgender issues. Adam counters by highlighting the diverse range of guests on these platforms and his appreciation for the conversations they spark, even if he doesn't agree with all viewpoints.

Notable Quotes:

• Danielle [08:38]: "Nick Fuentes has to take it down because they got in trouble, started selling a shirt, your body, my choice."
• Adam [30:22]: "I love the conversation. I love the debates."

Gender Dynamics and Communication Struggles

The hosts explore how their media habits affect gender dynamics within their marriage. Danielle emphasizes the emotional burden women carry, especially in the wake of political changes, and the need for men to be more empathetic and understanding. Adam acknowledges some of these differences but struggles to fully grasp the extent of Danielle's frustrations.

Notable Quotes:

• Danielle [35:58]: "We are looking to lessen the divide between men and women."
• Adam [39:52]: "But you do realize that, right?"

Parenting and Protecting Children from Misinformation

Danielle brings attention to the responsibility they have as parents to shield their children from harmful misinformation. She voices concern over their sons potentially adopting problematic viewpoints from the media Adam consumes, such as misogynistic phrases and harmful stereotypes.

Notable Quotes:

• Danielle [42:10]: "I have to explain to you why you shouldn't use Charlie Kirk as entertainment."
• Adam [50:33]: "I don't want to listen anymore."

Impact of Social Media and Information Sources

The conversation shifts to the role of social media in amplifying divisive content. Danielle criticizes platforms like Twitter for fostering division through bots and misinformation, while Adam discusses the challenges of authentic engagement online and the prevalence of automated accounts.

Notable Quotes:

• Danielle [18:35]: "They are from other countries and they want to see Division in America."
• Adam [19:16]: "Twitter is like 70, 80% bots."

Conclusion and Final Thoughts

As the episode progresses, Danielle and Adam confront their deep-seated differences in media consumption and its effects on their relationship. They acknowledge the difficulties in bridging their perspectives but express a desire to find common ground to preserve their marriage and family dynamics. The episode concludes with a sense of ongoing struggle but also a commitment to understanding each other's viewpoints better.

Notable Quotes:

• Danielle [83:26]: "I don't think it's benefiting us in any way."
• Adam [88:30]: "To fight you on this."

Key Insights and Takeaways

• Communication Breakdown: The episode highlights how differing media consumption habits can strain marital relationships, emphasizing the need for open and empathetic communication.

• Influence of Media Personalities: Danielle's critique of male-dominated media figures underscores the potential negative impact such personalities can have on societal gender dynamics and personal relationships.

• Parental Responsibilities: The discussion underscores the importance of parents actively engaging in their children's media consumption to prevent the adoption of harmful beliefs.

• Social Media's Role: Both hosts recognize the divisive role of social media platforms in exacerbating political and gender tensions, stressing the need for critical engagement with online content.

Final Thoughts

"So Nice, We Had To Argue Twice (Post Election Part 2)" offers a candid look into how political events and media consumption intersect with personal relationships. Danielle and Adam navigate their disagreements with honesty, providing listeners with a nuanced exploration of maintaining a healthy marriage amidst societal and informational challenges.

Transcript

[Danielle]

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[Adam]

Hey, everybody. Welcome to marriage and Martinis. I'm Adam. Here is Danielle.

[Danielle]

Hello.

[Adam]

So how are you feeling about the feedback from the last episode?

[Danielle]

Exhausted.

[Adam]

I mean, they say never read reviews or, you know, comments or all that kind of stuff.

[Danielle]

Yeah.

[Adam]

But I, you know, hey, listen, now people understand my struggles, so thank you for the feedback.

[Danielle]

Well, that was one review.

[Adam]

All right. One's all I need.

[Danielle]

No, listen, it was a crazy week. And I know, as I said, my friends who decided to not touch the election on their platforms, you know, were texting me, like I told you, I told you, you know, don't do it. But, and listen. And there was part of me that was jealous of them for not having to deal with this. But also, I don't know that there are, there are people who I really admire who have kept quiet, you know, on their platforms that I'm sort of like, I don't know. I, I, I'm upset that they've done that. The people who I, I don't think you need to speak out against everything. You know what I mean? There are sometimes where, like, why aren't you speaking out about this or this or this or this? But, like, I do think that, and I'm talking about both ways. Like, no matter which way, you know, if you don't want to touch this, you're really ignoring the elephant in the room. Right. And I think that there are so many people who are looking right now, just, if nothing else, for a place to like, just kind of be sad and angry together.

[Adam]

Yeah. Look, I think we, I think we did it the right way. Right. So, you know, there were a couple of people who were saying, you know, I don't tune in to listen to politics. When I returned to your episode, you know, your, your show or, you know, all those things. Okay, we understand that. That's not what we were doing. We were just kind of discussing the after. The after effects.

[Danielle]

Yeah.

[Adam]

For us.

[Danielle]

And I mean, I was raging some.

[Adam]

Well, listen, you know, you, it was five days post election and, yeah, and that's fine. It wasn't a political. Like, we weren't like. Was it. I mean.

[Danielle]

I mean, we definitely. But you. How do you talk about fine?

[Adam]

So we have. Fine. We had one.

[Danielle]

Right. Okay, well, this might be. This might be a tiny bit like that. Fine.

[Adam]

We had two. Right to two out of 300 or whatever it is is not awful.

[Danielle]

And the people who were like, you know. Yeah. Like you said, I listen for marriage and family. In what world does navigating this election not seep into your marriage and your family? And especially put on top of that, the upcoming holidays and how you're going to navigate that and, you know, just all the things. And, you know, are we inviting, you know, Uncle Jimmy, who is, you know, obviously going to start something fun?

[Adam]

He has to come.

[Danielle]

Okay. I mean, you know, and then, I mean, there are people who. I don't know if I said this last. Last week, but people who had weddings planned around the time of the election decided not to have alcohol served.

[Adam]

Oh, really?

[Danielle]

Because they were.

[Adam]

They didn't want. Like, they were crazy going on.

[Danielle]

Yeah. I mean, they were so, like, I guess a few years ago, you know, I mean, what. You usually plan a wedding, like, what, maybe one to two years in advance and you're not really thinking about the timing of it, you know.

[Adam]

But you know what that reminds me of when you and I first started dating the second time. And what was it, a New Year's? It was some kind of. We went into New York for some kind of party, and this is when who Wants to Be a Millionaire just came out. And that was on the big screen in the bar that we were at. So the whole party stopped to watch who Wants to Be a Millionaire? Because it was like the new thing. It was hot. It was on tv. I can only imagine if you're like, you have a wedding planned and it's on, you know, close to election day or new, you know, like, the whole thing stops and everybody's just watching that and going over that, you know, like.

[Danielle]

Well, and. Yeah, I mean, it is very hard. I saw, you know, I look around that. What?

[Adam]

Do you remember what part of that was?

[Danielle]

I don't even know what you're talking about.

[Adam]

You don't remember? Well, it was your. I mean, it was in the. You know, it was your family, something.

[Danielle]

I don't know.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Danielle]

You don't remember.

[Adam]

I think it was a New Year's Day.

[Danielle]

Yeah, it might have been.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Danielle]

But the thing about this also is, I think it's incredible to Me that we, as a society, we have this. This enormous day, which, you know, one half is. Or, you know, one half of the voters are celebrating, one half of the voters are distraught. And, like, the next day you just, like, go to work. You know, you just, like, go on with your life. And it's so hard. And I was really struggling. I mean, I was struggling anyway with other stuff. And we have our son's bar mitzvah's coming up, and, like, I'm super stressed about that and, you know, all other. Just stuff on top of it. But, like, I don't know, I was sort of like, how are people just.

[Adam]

Going, it's like the day after Thanksgiving where you're like, oh, I'm so fucking full.

[Danielle]

Yeah, but at least most people take over off the day after Thanksgiving.

[Adam]

It's like, fuck, I gotta get up and deal with reality. And, like, you know.

[Danielle]

Well, and you also have to make sure, you know, like, I've been sad and stuff, but I also don't want the kids to be like, you know, oh, my God, Mom's so upset, or.

[Adam]

Mom, like, what, you don't want them to be?

[Danielle]

No.

[Adam]

Is that what you said?

[Danielle]

Yeah.

[Adam]

I mean, how could they not be?

[Danielle]

Yeah, but. But there have been times, you know, where they've said to me, like, they've asked me questions and stuff, and I'm just like, you know, I'm trying to give them the most upbeat answer I can, even though, look, of course I'm scared. I'm, you know, upset.

[Adam]

All the things, they should come to me, not you. Well, if they want to remain positive in any way.

[Danielle]

No, no, but I have been. I mean, I've sort of been like, you know, look, we're, you know, the issues that we believe in will still, you know, fight for them.

[Adam]

And so can you explain to me then. We haven't discussed this yet. Obviously, after the election and listening to last week's episode and, you know, I know your feelings, and everybody knows your feelings, so why are you more positive now a week later? What happened? Is it just.

[Danielle]

I'm not positive.

[Adam]

You just said you're.

[Danielle]

No, I was saying that to the kids that I was.

[Adam]

Oh, you were just saying to them.

[Danielle]

Yeah. No, I. I have moments where I'm sort of like, okay, look, we. You know, it'll be okay. This is not the end of the world. And then, you know, you know, he puts Matt Gaetz in as the, you know, like, I just. And, you know, the. The balancing everything. The balancing of, you know, social media and knowing That I can't ignore it. And I can't. I mean, and I've had so many people thank me for speaking out, right? So many people saying thank you. You know, all these other places that I'm going in social media and they're pretending like it's not a thing. And then, of course, I've gotten tons of H feedback, too. And, and you know, there have been some other things, too, like the. Did you watch the Nick Fuentes video?

[Adam]

No.

[Danielle]

Your body, my choice?

[Adam]

No, but I know I heard about it.

[Danielle]

Yeah, from me or from.

[Adam]

Yeah, from you. So what else do I have?

[Danielle]

Well, I don't know. I don't know what we're listening to in the car and in the, you know, I don't know what you're listening to. I don't know. Maybe Rogan did a whole thing on it and how appalled he is. But, you know, he said, you know, this whole awful rant and he was doxxed. People got his address and stuff. Apparently he's, like, living in a basement now.

[Adam]

I apologize. Wait, who said it?

[Danielle]

Nick Fuentes.

[Adam]

And who is he?

[Danielle]

So he's like a very far right Christian nationalist who, you know, is all the bad things that you can think of.

[Adam]

Okay.

[Danielle]

And he just, he, you know, look, he says things. Apparently back in the day, he was, I don't want to say normal, but, you know, he was, he was posting things online, trying to get us, you know, a community going, trying to become, like a famous figure. And he started saying, like, crazy. And as he started saying crazy, and he got more and more followers, you know, more people following him. And so, you know, now his whole thing is just crazy.

[Adam]

All right, so it sounds like it was done purposely. Like, at first it was like, I'm gonna be crazy. Let's see how it goes. And then it worked. And now he just says stupid things like.

[Danielle]

Well, I, I, I, I do think that some of the things that he says, I mean, my God, I think in order for those words to come out of your mouth, you have to somehow.

[Adam]

Your body, my choice.

[Danielle]

Yeah.

[Adam]

Was that like, Was he. All right, let me finish. Was he serious? Was he drunk? Was he, Was it like an Ambien thing? Was he just being quirky all the.

[Danielle]

Look at all the ways you're trying to.

[Adam]

No, I'm not trying. No, I'm not at all. How could somebody say something so stupid like that is. I'm trying to figure out the ways somebody would say something like that. Who, who believes your body might, like, it's not Real.

[Danielle]

Oh, really?

[Adam]

Do you think he's saying, I want.

[Danielle]

You to go to. It's on Twitter. I want you to go to the post and I want you to scroll and see all the comments that were left by other men.

[Adam]

So they're just affirming what he said.

[Danielle]

And so much Walmart. I think they had to take it down because they got in trouble, started selling a shirt, your body, my choice. And it was like being purchased. School districts are now dealing with boys going around to girls saying, your body, my choice. I know that on the Internet they looked up, leave me alone. Don't make fun of me. I'm too fragile. They looked up. How many times? Wait, hold on. I have it here. How many times? Your body, my choice. Hold on, hold on. Don't go anywhere.

[Adam]

I'm here. I have a question. I'm not letting it out of my.

[Danielle]

Body, my choice and other misogynistic phrases surge 4,600% following the US election results.

[Adam]

Okay, this is not a stupid question. It's going to sound like one, but it's not. I really want to know, what does it mean? Your body, my choice, basically, because there could be a few different scenarios we could be talking about sexually, we talking about abortion. We can talk, you know, I think all the ways in all the ways, like, you're a woman, I'm a man.

[Danielle]

Yeah. I think basically what he was saying is, women lost, men won, you belong to us. He said something about, you know, there is no glass ceiling. There's only a brick ceiling. And you're, you know, women are always just going to hit their heads on the bricks ceiling because men control the world. You know, it was a whole rant that was. That one thing was very catchy. But, you know, I posted something about it just saying everyone should talk to their kids. You know, imagine if every parent took this as an opportunity to say to their, you know, especially boys, this is not okay. This is not something you ever say. In fact, you. You let girls know that they're safe around you. Right? Like, if everybody did that, what an awesome response. Would that be it? You know, in light of. And I got a lot, I got a lot of heat saying, you know, you're just upset because you don't have, you know, because you didn't get your abortion and you didn't get your, you know, all your women stuff in the election. And I'm like, oh, my God, is this really. We can't all just agree that it's a good time to just say, say, you know, and so I got attacked for that. I got the other side too. And you know, and it was a meme that did really, really well. So obviously it resonated with a lot of people.

[Adam]

But yeah, I think this brings up a good point. I think finally, for, I guess it's a left wing view that how ridiculous is somebody supposed to sit like that's. He's a right wing, you're saying?

[Danielle]

No, I think there are a lot of conservative parents out there who think that this was absolutely disgusting.

[Adam]

I would hope so.

[Danielle]

Oh, yeah. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Adam]

Okay. But, but he is a, he's a conservative. He's a right way.

[Danielle]

Like, he's, he's. I mean, he is far extreme. Right.

[Adam]

But, but that's the thing is what, what's so confusing to me is most of the far ring wing right people are infuriated with the far left wing because they don't consider common sense. It's too much of. Well, feelings are more important than common sense. Right. So this is the opposite on the other side, which I haven't heard before, which is very strange. So it's common sense to be like, obviously a woman, you know, a woman's body is not mine as a man's. Right.

[Danielle]

Like, I'm gonna be honest, I don't know that I agree with you when, you know, there's someone who just became president, has 20 something sexual assault claims against him, someone who's just nominated for the doj, you know, the Department of Justice has, I mean, videos against him saying, you know, I mean, this is not a Democrat thing about, you know, Matt Gates. This is a bipartisan, like the man has. I mean, if, if you Google, there's, you know, there's me Republican senators coming forth saying he showed us videos of him snorting, you know, erectile dysfunction medicine, following it with Red Bull and then having sex.

[Adam]

Wait, what is that people? Come on. No, what I was trying to say was I don't consider something as ridiculous as that kind of statement a political thing.

[Danielle]

Like, that's why, that's what I said when I posted it. I've been, turned it into a political.

[Adam]

I've been, I've installed it and so have you in our boys, obviously, things like that before anything like this was said. Right. It's just common sense. It's make sure you treat, you know, girls with respect, make sure that you're nice and make sure that you, you know, all those things before any of this was even.

[Danielle]

Well, that was a big thing that people posted on my, on My meme and my, my thing, my thought about that is, who cares? Say it again. This is something that's come up. A lot of kids are going to be saying it. There might be peer pressure to say it. It might become something that you think is a joke. Right? It might be something like you said. Was he joking? Was he. This was that. These are young kids who aren't critically thinking about the effects of this on somebody. Right. Even if they see it as a joke, how hard is it to say to your kid, absolutely not. You're not allowed to go within 10ft?

[Adam]

Yeah, I know. Listen, I was a up kid, you know, So I, I, I've been there. I understand. But something, no, but something like that, even I would have been, like, what the. Like, I would never.

[Danielle]

But we live in a different world.

[Adam]

It's crazy.

[Danielle]

Yeah.

[Adam]

You know, like, you know, was I the nicest guy? No. Was, you know, all those things. But I never thought that way. I never, you know, I, I would never like something. There's something beyond just, okay.

[Danielle]

But again, he was not. He was kicked off Twitter. Elon came back, gave him a platform. And so therefore, you know, this is the whole free speech thing. Fine, he has free speech, but then we need to get ahead of it, you know, and so, anyway, so that was like a big thing that, that was happening simultaneously. And, you know, and I sort of felt like that was a constructive way to talk about current events and just sort of be like, listen, you know, we, we, we aren't agreeing on very much right now, but I think we can all, as parents, agree about this. And it backfired. And people were, like, pissed off at me. I mean, not, you know, I'm talking 20% of people, you know, who posted.

[Adam]

That's, that's a lot.

[Danielle]

Yeah. So, you know, people were just angry, right? They don't want, you know, but we're.

[Adam]

So tied up with these. Like, I am Maga. I am Kamala. I am. You know, like, we're so, like, like there's this fine line of if you don't cross this, like, that we're so defensive of these sides.

[Danielle]

Well, that's what, you know, that's, that's what, that's what is wanted. That's what you're supposed, supposed to happen. Right? They want to cause division. They want to wear everybody down so that nobody has the energy anymore to fight. Nobody has the energy anymore to care, because they just think, well, what's the difference? We're all gonna. And, you know, we all hate each other. Anyway, and we're not a country anymore.

[Adam]

And when you say they, who are you talking about?

[Danielle]

I mean, I don't want to get into all of that. Okay, but you know, for instance, like, there are, you know, they, they, there are, there is, there are bots and everything that are on the Internet. I mean, they are from other countries and they want to see Division in America.

[Adam]

It's insane. I, I, I said this before, I think a few episodes ago. I think Twitter is like what, 70, 80% bots, like Russian or Chinese, you know, bots that are just out there to divide us. And like, you'll go on Twitter and, or X and, you know, argue and you're talking to a fucking computer.

[Danielle]

Well, I deactivated Twitter.

[Adam]

So, so, but like all that you're seeing out there, you're literally arguing your points with something, with some program that's out there to make you even more mad.

[Danielle]

Yeah, I mean, there's, look, we could talk about Twitter.

[Adam]

I don't think, I can't because I don't know anything about, I never use it.

[Danielle]

Well, okay. But it's all the same things that I find to be appalling about Elon Musk are, you know, I, I, there's this 10 minute video that I put on my Instagram that's just very interesting that I was gonna send you. But then also I've been trying not to talk about anything or send you anything or involve you in anything because it just doesn't do me any good. And so I didn't. But it's pretty, you know, it's pretty telling. It's just 10 minutes and it's. I put it on my story. I'll probably put it on again. But, you know, a lot of scary stuff. So. Yeah.

[Adam]

Okay, let's take a break.

[Danielle]

Okay.

[Adam]

Right back. Applebee's has a brand new Big Easy menu.

[Danielle]

It features all your Bourbon street favorites.

[Adam]

And what in one new menu. Plus a new Bourbon street chicken and chicken and andouille sausage pennies. Done at just 11.99. Limited time, price participation and selection may vary.

[Danielle]

So last week I think we, I don't know how much you've been watching my stories on Instagram and everything. Have you been watching anything or. Okay, so I, I basically said last week, you know, you said at the beginning of the episode, you don't know much about stuff. You don't research very much. You don't feel like it touches our lives very much.

[Adam]

You know, I didn't say that.

[Danielle]

But what did you say?

[Adam]

I didn't say it doesn't touch our lives. Like, I don't even.

[Danielle]

Well, you said it's not going to impact us very much. Why am I so concerned?

[Adam]

Oh, right, yeah. So I did say, of all the issues, how much is it going to really affect your life personally? Correct, Right, I did say that.

[Danielle]

And I, I, I posted again. It was exhausting to be on social media this week. Right? Like, it was really super exhausting. And I know you think I bring that on myself, which I probably do.

[Adam]

I also want to preface, I also said I'm not saying it doesn't affect you or us personally, so don't worry about it and don't care about it and don't do anything about it. I never said that. Of course I, I was so proud of the fact that you and your family were out there canvassing and doing all those things and making sure, you know, I want good things for everybody. What I was saying was how intense and emotional you get about it has to be put into perspective. That's all.

[Danielle]

I think some of it is the anger of on top of it. And I, this is what I wound up having a lot of really good conversations with women about. And you know, and I gotta say, I, there were a lot of women, you know, a lot of people came for me who were anti or who are pro Trump. Right. I had a lot of people come with me. I also had some good discussions with people, right. Like, I'm not looking for this to be like, I'm not one of those people who are like, leave my, you know, I think we need to understand each other more obviously. I'm not one of those people who are like, if you voted for Trump, you need to leave this space and you're not welcome here and blah, blah. Like, I want to have conversations and, and the people who were willing to have those conversations, you know, whether it was in DMS or, you know, on mess or on comments, I wanted to, There are a few things that I, you know, a few ways I know that it's not people, when I, when I post the Nick Fuentes thing, the people who just literally said America first or MAGA or that was their response to it. I was sort of like, what the, like, you want to be associated. Like, I don't think that you really want to do this. Like, I don't think you really want. And I think probably there are a lot of conservatives out there who are probably like, don't associate me with Nick Fuente. You know what I mean? Like, that's ridiculous. I don't want to be associated with Nick. I don't believe what he believes. But that's their comeback, right? Is mega or America first. And these are obviously, you know, I'm not. I'm not arguing with them. There's no point. You know, there's also people who, look, if you think January 6th wasn't horrendous, or you believe it didn't happen, or you think that the election was rigged, I'm sorry, we have nothing to talk about. About. To me, that's like a big divider of, you know, rational. But we. We rigged it in 2020, but not 2024. Like, I'm sorry, give us a little more credit than that. We rigged it once, we'll do it again. I mean, just so many things, right? All the police officers that were hurt and, you know, people who are pro.

[Adam]

Well, you hear all the lash back where they'll say something like, well, Trump did tweet, let's do this peacefully. Let's sure.

[Danielle]

Just like anything else, they jump through hoops to, you know, look, no matter what, you know, they'll say, it was a peaceful. This peaceful that. I. I'm sorry, we're done. I can't. There's no arguing with somebody like that. You know, and people who obviously have not, like I said, done the research, who don't know the facts, who are spewing out, who only listen. Newsmax is not news. You know what I mean? Like, you know, Steve Bannon's podcast is not okay, but this is. That's your thing. Like, that's. The people don't get that. So there are certain things. And like I said, I listened to Megyn Kelly's podcast a few times this week. I listened to, you know, Fox News. Like, I don't.

[Adam]

I would have loved to bit up, fly in the wall watching you listen to Megyn Kelly.

[Danielle]

So I do sometimes listen to Megyn Kelly. First of all, you know, Megyn Kelly is one of those people who. She's very smart. I do believe she's smart back in the day. You know, it's very strange because she. She was somebody who I believe was kind of pro woman, even if she was a Republican, you know, Like, I don't believe that all Republicans are. You know, I think that she has become this in, like, this really awful, mean, horrendous person. But again, I don't want to be in the. Like in the Democratic void. Right? Like, in the Democrat void. I don't want to be that person who has no idea what's going on in the minds. And sometimes, you know, not, not Megyn Kelly per se, but sometimes, look, I get certain things. I understand the argument for some things. Right. I understand that people feel like things are getting shoved down their throats. And I, I get it. But you know, I also, during that episode when I try to listen with an open mind, you know, and she is the per. She is one of the people who is very, very outspoken about, you know, these trans people being in locker rooms and these, you know, and men and women's sports and whatever. And she's pro Matt Gates being doj. Because Trump should do, after everything he's been through, he should do whatever he wants and whatever. I'm sorry, but like, you're going to give, really, you're so anti pedophile and yet you're going to give someone the benefit of the doubt who's been accused and who has been investigated and who Republicans say have seen videos of it? Like, come on, there's, it's not like he's the only candidate. There's lots of other candidates. So that's, to me, where I just, I can't take her seriously, you know.

[Adam]

But, but there's things that she says that you're like, okay, that makes sense. But because of this other thing, what you're saying now, it not relevant.

[Danielle]

I think sometimes when they talk about, I think sometimes when they talk about the, the amount to which certain things are discussed or how they feel like maybe some things have gone over the line. Okay, I, I'm not gonna say I agree with it, but it's an argument I'm willing to have. You know what I mean?

[Adam]

Yeah, I know.

[Danielle]

Discussion I'm willing to, I understand.

[Adam]

There's somebody that I watch on YouTube that, you know, same situation. So I, you know, I watch a lot of clips and all those kind of things. So, like I, I'll watch Charlie.

[Danielle]

Charlie Kirk. Oh, God.

[Adam]

So I love watching his videos. I don't love him. I. Because he said he has points and things that I'm like, okay, that's a conversation that makes sense. And then it just all falls apart when he says something else where I'm like, all right, you lost me, you know, entirely.

[Danielle]

This is what I don't understand. Because for me, I listen to Megyn Kelly because. Or, you know, not just Megyn Kelly, there are other, you know, republic in voices who I'll, you know, who I'll listen to sometime who I don't. Or independent voices who I listen to because again, I don't Want to be that person who is like totally out of the, you know, you can't have a conversation with because I just have absolutely no idea where your perspective is coming from. And on some issues I don't. But. But why? What for? For you, who is somebody who says that you don't research and says that you don't keep up to date on things. Why would he be a voice you would choose?

[Adam]

I. All right. I find it entertaining. That's number one. I find valid points and things that he says I like watching. All right, so the videos, they kind of throw at you, like I don't know if they're edited. I don't know if, you know, the people that he's talking to are just completely whacked out of the universe saying crazy things that he has a good response for.

[Danielle]

But, but like, why not take that time to do real research?

[Adam]

What do you mean real research? Like, what's real research? Real research isn't watching or listening.

[Danielle]

You didn't know. You said you heard something about Nick Fuentes, but you didn't research about it. It would be really great you have two boys if instead of listening to Charlie Kirk, okay, you were researching what happened with Nick Fuentes.

[Adam]

That's a great examp where I didn't need to research because I've already. I already know what I need to teach my boys.

[Danielle]

So you talk to them about it?

[Adam]

Those things? Of course.

[Danielle]

I just said after this, after that came out. You talked to them about it?

[Adam]

I. No, I didn't, but I talked about it with them before.

[Danielle]

Okay, but then you're in the same category as the people say, I don't need to. I don't need to.

[Adam]

But wait a minute. But I did it. And then I need to say to them again after, yes, this.

[Danielle]

That's what I'm saying. Someone is making jokes about this sometimes. Our middle son, as incredible as he is, as wonderful soul as he is, he does, he's a 16 year old boy. He does sometimes joke about things that I don't want him joking about. I could nothing like this.

[Adam]

I could never imagine him ever saying anything like that.

[Danielle]

That's great, but what about instead of listening to Charlie Kirk?

[Adam]

I'm not listening.

[Danielle]

You come, you get up on some, some current events, some things that are happening that maybe like I'm just trying to understand, right? Because that's always a, A comeback. Is that.

[Adam]

No, you're missing the point. For me it's entertainment more than it is research or changing my beliefs or agreeing with those Far. You know what?

[Danielle]

No, go ahead.

[Adam]

That's it. It's, you know, it's. I'm entertained by those things. Like, I enjoy watching them for fun. I'm not doing it because I'm watching him for research or because I agree with everything that he says or, okay, his politics align with mine, I'm gonna.

[Danielle]

Speak for me, but I'm also going to. Until women say otherwise to their husbands or are listening to this, you know, with or without their husbands or whatever, here's what I'm gonna say. Here's my issue with it. We are looking as wives who are married to men. You know, people who are dating who are looking to meet a man, you know, fathers to their kids, that, you know, how we want this to be approached with sons and daughters and everything. We are looking to lessen the divide between men and women. Right? Like, we are looking to have you more understand us listening to Charlie Kirk, if anything, does the opposite. I don't care if you say whether or not you're listening to him. Sometimes I hear you say things, and I know even though it's entertainment, because you're not listening to those opposing voices, you retain it more than you think. And. And that's, that's the problem is, you know, people will say, like, you know, oh, I listen to this person or I listen to this part, and I say, okay, who are you? What are you listening to? That is going to have the opposite effect. And for you, I've always said, I wish you listened to more. More women's based stuff. Right? I wish you would understand more the. The female experience. And honestly, I think that 70% of women wouldn't be leaving their husbands if they better understood the female experience. Experience. And I think it has a lot to do with the decline of relationship and bonds and everything in. In relationship. Like, I. I think that you guys have the opportunity to try to better understand us, and instead you're like, oh, I want to be entertained by this guy.

[Adam]

Okay, what should I learn by listening to a female podcast or watching a female thing? Like, what should I learn?

[Danielle]

How we. How overwhelmed we feel, how lonely. Okay, go ahead.

[Adam]

No, we're all overwhelmed. Okay.

[Danielle]

Yeah, see, that's when I can't have this.

[Adam]

I'm not. But that's not fair. I mean, what. How are you more overwhelmed than me as a man and you as a woman?

[Danielle]

Well, again, well, the election just happens, right? I'm. I'm taking it very, very seriously because it affects me so much. You're not. Because it doesn't Affect you so much.

[Adam]

Okay, so how does it affect you so much?

[Danielle]

Women's rights.

[Adam]

No, you. You said you. How does it affect you so much?

[Danielle]

Women's rights being taken away affects me because it completely alters the way women are looked at in society and how much power we're allowed to have and how things are going backwards rather than forwards and how people like Nick Fuentes feel like they can say, your body, my choice. Now, when they did not feel like they could say that before.

[Adam]

Okay, they probably could have said that before. I don't know if. Do you think the election had something to do with him being able to say.

[Danielle]

I think being back on Twitter and having a platform that he didn't have before gave him something. I mean. No, you have to follow his YouTube channel to see him on YouTube. Right. You don't have to follow him on Twitter to see him on Twitter. Right. Things just come up. And again, Elon Musk controls the algorithm. So. So things like that. It's all enmeshed, right? Am I going to have an abortion anytime? No, because you have a vasectomy. Does that matter to me? No, that has. That's the problem is that you guys look at abortion as this, like, one, you know, very, very, like, isolated thing that you have to be able. If you're not going to have an abortion, it's, it's not important and you don't have to worry about it. And of course I do. Plus, I have nieces. Plus I have friends with daughters. Plus I have, you know.

[Adam]

Okay, but. But so do I. So how. I'm talking about me, maybe not men in general, but what I'm saying is.

[Danielle]

That I had the mental load and the weight of the election on top of everything else. You did not. Trump won. And you were sort of like, all right, that sucks.

[Adam]

Yeah, I guess I'm looking at the. The bigger picture of our. You and me, our lives.

[Danielle]

But that's what's not fair. That's, that's. But that's, that's, that's. The difference is that we have all this stuff as women on top of that. Right. That now we're sort of going for those of us who.

[Adam]

So you don't think men have certain things that women don't, that we have?

[Danielle]

No, I didn't say that.

[Adam]

But you just did. You just said it's all. You almost said equal. But you have these other things to worry about as a woman.

[Danielle]

What things do I have that you don't? And I answered you recently that this is one of the things. Right.

[Adam]

No, I'm sorry, I'm confused.

[Danielle]

The election that I was super stressed, it was a huge weight on me. You know, I also have a brother and a sister in law who could possibly lose their jobs. That's a big deal to me. You know, things hit me differently emotionally than they do you.

[Adam]

Correct. Yes.

[Danielle]

Okay. And that's a weight I carry. And it's a weight I carry because I look at the world differently than you. And I don't just look at our little stratosphere and our little, you know, hub here and our little.

[Adam]

Okay, that's fair. I appreciate.

[Danielle]

And so I, I am dealing with a lot. And my point is. Go ahead.

[Adam]

No, nothing. No, no. I guess the comparison is what you just said. How you're, you worry about, you know, the worldview and women in general. Yeah. Where my concern is us, my family, how, you know, okay. Taking care of my family.

[Danielle]

We can even talk about that. We can even talk about that. Right. We've had issues within our relationship that affect me a lot more than they affect you recently. Stuff in family stuff that affects me more than it affects you.

[Adam]

Well, that's a generalization too, which I agree with you, that things don't affect me as much as they do you. Yeah, that's fair. I accept that.

[Danielle]

You know, I, I also feel like, you know, we talked about it in an episode recently. Look, I'm going through perimenopause. Right. There's crazy shit happening to me on top of.

[Adam]

I've been researching, by the way.

[Danielle]

Oh, good.

[Adam]

I have, I've been.

[Danielle]

That's great.

[Adam]

I've been researching perimenopause, menopause, all that.

[Danielle]

I appreciate that.

[Adam]

I have, I want, I want to learn, I want to know. And I have been doing it.

[Danielle]

Well, I really appreciate that. So, you know, all of these things that are, we, we think about and emotionally. I'm not trying to imply that you don't have worries. I am implying that as women, first of all, we have no choice. We are consumed by content from men. Right. I mean, just in, in, in all the ways men have so much more of a majority. Even though, you know, we have more women in the world.

[Adam]

I'm not following you. How men have more content than women.

[Danielle]

Men, Men hold a. You know, your, your voices are everywhere. Right. You're, you know, it's, it's everywhere men are. Again, they're, they're, they're all over. Right. And, and women are not quite as represented in our voices. Plus we have to scream louder. We have to work harder, you know, all of the things it takes, you know, and then I'm not even getting into then, you know, women of color who have to do that much more. And whatever I'm talking about, you know, I'm kind of talking from a personal place. That's a whole different ball game. But I think that, that basically what I'm trying to say is. And see, even you fighting me on this.

[Adam]

I'm not fighting. You're discussing.

[Danielle]

Okay, but. But you are. Because what I'm saying to you is I don't know why the fuck you need to listen to Charlie Kirk because you know that I'm so. I'm so desperate for you to more. To better understand the female experience and for you to be a more sensitive person who you have personally on this podcast as well as in our private life, said you're just not emotional. You're not, you know, someone who.

[Adam]

Okay, maybe I've said that. Maybe I think that's not so much true.

[Danielle]

Okay, well, that's something you haven't said.

[Adam]

But do you think that I treat you like a. Somebody like that? Do you think that my.

[Danielle]

Do I think you might. Treated me badly? Yes, absolutely. And I think that in the.

[Adam]

No. Okay.

[Danielle]

And I think that there was a time in our relationship where I couldn't leave you because financially I couldn't leave you. And that is not something you would ever have to worry about. When we were going through all our stuff around the guilt episode and stuff, I couldn't leave even if I wanted to. Right. Financially, I was at a loss. I wasn't. I didn't have a job. I wasn't work. Like, I couldn't.

[Adam]

Yeah, but. Okay, maybe it was true at that point, but that's not true now. I mean.

[Danielle]

Or, you know, I just say you said. Do you feel like. Yes. I feel like there have been things that you have done that in a heartbeat that if I had done, you would have never come back from.

[Adam]

I've done some really awful things on a different, completely different wavelength. Like nothing to do with like a Charlie Kirk or a Joe Rogan or Elon Musk or whatever. No.

[Danielle]

And I don't want to get into it because I don't want to go back there.

[Adam]

But no, I've done stupid things that were me, like not based on. They weren't based on who I listened.

[Danielle]

To or my beliefs. Whether you know it or not, it gives you license. The fact that you thought that you could do it. And I could name several things and so could I.

[Adam]

And that was a long time ago. Okay, but I think.

[Danielle]

I just don't ever think about it.

[Adam]

No, but hold on. I didn't listen to any of these people back then.

[Danielle]

Right, but you have always listened to mostly male voices, all male music, all male movies, all male shows, all. You are in the male stratosphere fair.

[Adam]

But I didn't listen to any voices like, you're. Like we're talking about now.

[Danielle]

See that.

[Adam]

Up until the last four years. What?

[Danielle]

So it's very hard to have a conversation with you like this. And people say, let him speak. Let him speak. You know, about all of this.

[Adam]

See, a lot of people disagree.

[Danielle]

So, okay, fine, I'm letting. What I'm saying is. I'm letting you speak. And yet I can't get you to what?

[Adam]

Nothing. Good.

[Danielle]

Well, the last week, I really. I said to people, I really can't. Like, how do I let him speak about things that he has no knowledge about? Right. Like, how do I allow you to put misinformation out into the world?

[Adam]

I'm not putting misinformation out because I'm saying last week. Yeah, but everything that I say. If I'm saying I don't research and have knowledge, everything that I say is based on my opinion or my own thoughts about certain things. It's not.

[Danielle]

And that's very dangerous.

[Adam]

Dangerous for who? I'm not. We're not a political figure talking about.

[Danielle]

Trans and how you don't think trans should be in sports and all of that. You have no background about it, you know, no research. You haven't read any studies. You were just putting out an opinion. Trans lives are in jeopardy. And for me to let you put that opinion out into the world. I have. We both have friends, both of us, who have trans kids. And I cannot allow that information to be put out into the world.

[Adam]

No, you're. I. Maybe you're misconstruing what I was saying. Then there's obviously trans people who need support and acceptance and all of those things. It was all the other things that I think are the Charlie Kirks and the Joe Rogans and whoever else who point out the things that may be minimal, like trans and sports or hormone blockers for children or have you done all this? Stop, Please let me speak.

[Danielle]

It's so hard for me because.

[Adam]

Okay, but those are the things. Maybe they're not huge examples. Maybe they happen twice. Who knows? I don't know, because I didn't research, I didn't Google. How many people have, you know, been involved in these things. But I think people are worried about the fact that crazy things are happening in this country. If that's going to be one of those things that become a mainstream thing, that doesn't make sense. But nobody's saying, of course there's real trans people out there that need our support and love and acceptance. I don't know of anybody who's not saying that.

[Danielle]

Are you serious?

[Adam]

Yeah. The people that I listen to, nobody says anything like that.

[Danielle]

So hard for me because I know that that's not true. And they think Donald Trump said, you send your kid to school, they get a trans operation and come home. Now you people believe that now?

[Adam]

Okay, okay, okay. I don't listen to Donald Trump.

[Danielle]

These are his people.

[Adam]

Okay, so fine. So there's a contradictory thing here, right?

[Danielle]

I'm just trying to, like, be on the more sensitive side and listen to what I'm saying. You have to take. That's not fair. No, that's, that's. It's not that. It's not. It's not that it's not fair. It's that you want to be able to, again, you just, like all these other low information voters, you want to be able to just have your opinion and have that somehow be, be, be, be transferable with facts, and it's not okay. And, and for you to sit here and argue about something that is not an issue.

[Adam]

And it's not an issue now. Maybe, maybe it was a couple.

[Danielle]

How about if you listen to a podcast instead about abortion, which is an issue? How about if instead you listen to a podcast about the Department of Education being dismantled, which is an issue? How about if you listen to something about men saying things like your body, my choice, which is an issue? How about if you listen to things about women saying, yes, we are emotionally so freaking drained because our husbands are just listening to people like Charlie Kirk and Joe Rogan as entertainment. And so therefore, it's making it even harder for them to understand our plight. And they think that it's just entertainment, when to us, it is so much more than that. And so you choosing that entertainment over the issues that truly impact the American public and myself and your kids and your friends. Kids, to me, I say to myself, wow, what a privilege. What a privilege that you can listen to all that stuff as entertainment. And it's not a big deal because it affects real people's lives. Charlie Kirk hurts people. Joe Rogan hurts people. And it is not okay. And it really, really is. Somebody who is in a marriage where we've had Issues with you making choices that were very rooted in misogyny and very rooted in things that were so obviously wrong that maybe that's not the right route to go to continue to listen to those kinds of people. And maybe the route is to try to. Instead of bridging that gap even more, to try to make it so that we better understand each other. Este.

[Adam]

Estel mejor momento de horrarin Verizon por que puertas imagina.

[Danielle]

Selfies incredibles ivasapodera.

[Adam]

Visita tutienda verizonos 5G cuatro telephonos aura en estros planes. Vas vajos al intercampierta elephonos de Apple, Samsung or Google and qual care condition solo and Verizon. All right, so we just took a really long break. What was that, like, two hours, maybe, just from that past conversation and just kind of conversed between ourselves. And you were sending me, like, video clips and stuff of things that you want to make sure that I'm aware of, of things that I'm watching from people and some of their beliefs and things that they're saying. And like, I had no. Like, I never saw that stuff before. I didn't know, like, when I was telling you that I was watching, like, clips and stuff, it's like, you know, the shorts, like YouTube shorts that are like, quick little. Maybe it's my algorithm or like, I've never seen stuff like that before.

[Danielle]

Right.

[Adam]

Like, I see, like, wacky things that people say and people's that I watch, their reactions to them and all kind of made sense to me, but, like, stuff like that. Yeah, like, it makes sense to me that I guess research needs to be done about these people before I start watching them to learn about their real, true values. Because some of those things that you were sending me, well, fuck, I don't want those values involved in my life and your life and my children's lives. So it made sense to me. And yeah, I guess I need to be more understanding of who I'm watching or listening to and I guess maybe defending before realizing the true values that lie in there before I go saying, hey, well, you know, there's some things I agree with, some things I don't without knowing the true nature of what's behind everything. But, you know. Yeah, so I. Yeah, I just wanna, you know, it's kind of like a, you know.

[Danielle]

Well, actually, first our son came in, we were talking about Charlie Kirk, and he said, dad, you listen to Charlie Kirk, okay? And I wait and I said I'm waiting. I said to him, please tell him that I have never told you about Charlie Kirk. This has nothing to do with me. I didn't want you to think I, like, sent him down here to, like, say something to you. It's that he's seen probably the same videos you have, and he knows that this is not a. And listen, there's a Republican's gonna be listening to this, saying, how the fuck can you not let him listen to Charlie Kirk? If I want my husband to listen to Charlie Kirk, I'll marry someone who votes for Trump. I'm not. That's. I'm not. That's. I'm not gonna do that. I'm not gonna. I'm not going to. You know, that's. Listen, if that's your values and you're fine, go have your marriage. That is not the. I am not willing to sacrifice that part of myself.

[Adam]

And. And. And hearing the things that were being said that were video. I mean, they didn't look Doctor. They didn't look edited. It didn't look like AI. It looked like it was.

[Danielle]

You don't need to get anything doctored for Charlie Kerr.

[Adam]

You know, you just. When you see clips and you're like, oh, okay, nothing like that. You're like, oh, there's what.

[Danielle]

But can I say to you, because you kept saying to me, what do I have? What overwhelm do I have that you don't have? You kept saying to me, like, what overwhelm do I have, Danielle? What do I have that you, Adam, don't have? Right. Like, we're both overwhelmed. What do women have that men don't have? No, this.

[Adam]

Yeah. No, no, no.

[Danielle]

This.

[Adam]

I wasn't.

[Danielle]

I have to explain to you why you shouldn't use Charlie Kirk as entertainment. And some people are going to construe this as me controlling you. Fine. I don't want to if you don't. If you don't want to. If you want to listen, Charlie Kirk, you go get a different wife. And you are. Go ahead, go listen. But I'm just saying, as for me, you watching that and everything I believe in and I've instilled in my kids and all of that stuff. And then on top of it, just like last week, I was saying, I have to explain to you because you don't feel like you have the need to be understanding. What you're listening to is a huge toll on us as women, trying to convince our husbands that we are worthy enough of them not to listen to People who are against us.

[Adam]

Okay? And again, I, this is not a defense and I'm not fighting you and I'm not anything. I like a bunch of the things that you say to me, you know, I wish you wouldn't listen to or watch or whatever. Like this is a perfect example. Like this Charlie Kirk. Like, I don't watch Charlie Kirk. I don't listen to, like, it's a thing that shows up in my short, my YouTube shorts. Like it's a, a 42nd thing that comes up every once in a while. Like I, I don't go in my car and put his thing on and listen. I do it. Joe Rogan. Yes, I do. Okay, but I just want to clarify a little bit. Like, I get, maybe I get defensive because when you or Ian or you know, you watch, you know, you watch Charlie Kirk or you listen, like, no, it shows up in a, like when you swipe. You know what I mean? Like, it's, I'm not a.

[Danielle]

But you don't need any help in. I don't need. Again, I don't need us to be further divided in our understanding of each other. Right? And of course, and I listen to tons of men. First of all, we have no choice. Like, it's everywhere. And secondly, I just do. There are a lot of men who I really respect, right? And, and I don't think they're perfect. And I don't think a lot of the women that I listen to are perfect, right? There are a lot of women who I used to listen to, who I don't anymore because I just, I found them to be, you know, they got either, you know, too far left or they got too far, you know, removed from reality or they let fame overtake them or same thing, right? But there are a lot of men also that I listen to that I get. I understand the male perspective, right? I don't, There are certain people I don't love Bill Maher, I really don't. I think he's has interesting idea. I've never told you not to listen to him. I, I, I, I don't love a lot of what he says, but I'm not, not enough to not tell you to write. There are people that you listen to. You know, I appreciate some of the people, the men you listen to. I get it. I think it's good.

[Adam]

I just, I think a lot of. I'm cutting you off. I'm sorry, it sounded like you were kind of. No, no, no, that's okay. Like, that's another example. Like I do Enjoy watching Bill Maher. I don't love Bill Maher. You know, I disagree with, you know, I'm probably 60 to 70% in agreement of things that he says. I think he's condescending. I think he's kind of an asshole. I think, you know, all those things. But there's, you know, there's things about when you're watching or listening to Bill Mart, like, I love the confrontation. I love that he's open to having the most far right wing people on his show and having discussions and debates and like, I like that stuff. You know, I'm not persuaded in, well, maybe a little bit sometimes, but for the most part it's just, I enjoy listening to things that come from both sides and hearing the, the debates and hearing, you know, both sides of whatever the situation is, you know, whether I like the person or not. And that's, you know, perfect example for like a Joe Rogan or anything. Like, I, I listen to Joe Rogan because, number one, it's entertaining for me because of his guests, not because of him. Like, I'm not into him because of his politics or his advice or his, like, whatever. He's got the greatest guests on of any podcast there is. All the scientists, all the comedians, all like, I love that stuff. I love when they get into the, about the conspiracies and aliens and Area 50, like, all those kinds of things. That's what I'm into. That's what I listen for when I don't listen to the, the MMA episodes or like.

[Danielle]

But you're still helping him have a platform.

[Adam]

Right? And I wanted to ask you about this too. I took a clip. I don't even know if you want to hear it or not. It doesn't matter. But because there's. I know what you're gonna say. Like when he says things that are very, like, you know, he was very left liberal his entire life up until recently. And he has a lot of values that are very liberal leaning. Used to and still does. But the, the flip side of it is he says things and then he voted for Trump. Right. So, like, he'll say things that are.

[Danielle]

Same thing that so many of them do. Same thing that so many. They give you a little bit so that they can say, wait a minute, but I said this. It's all a tactic.

[Adam]

Yeah, but it doesn't make sense. It's so bizarre. Like, he'll. I have a perfect example. Can I play it?

[Danielle]

Sure.

[Adam]

Because I don't know, are we gonna.

[Danielle]

Is it, Are we gonna get like Flagged for copyright.

[Adam]

Let Joe Rogan come after us. Let me see what happens. I mean, okay, so when we ended last episode last week, you were saying, you know, these people, they have no heart, they have no feelings, they have no, you know, those kinds of things. And when I heard this episode, this is just from right before the election. I think one of the episodes where I was like listening to this and saying what he's saying is making sense. But listening to it now, it's like, but he voted for Trump. Which is exact. What I'll play it and then we'll. We can discuss.

[C]

But some people believe is true. And apparently there might have been a case in Texas. Jamie, I know you're googling, but.

[Danielle]

Yeah.

[C]

Where we were talking about women in a place where it's restrictive. Like Texas has a six week law, which is crazy because you don't even know you're pregnant in six weeks. You barely missed your period. Right. It's crazy. Especially if your period's like not regular. And then if you go to another state where abortion is legal and they find out they can prosecute you.

[Danielle]

Right?

[C]

So that's the type of stuff I think that could, she could win on that.

[Adam]

Right. Because that is crazy.

[C]

It's not just crazy, it's gross. Because here's why it's gross. Not, not just because you shouldn't be able to tell people where the fuck to go and where, where they can go and do things that it's a legal medical procedure. But imagine if you're a woman who gets pregnant and you have a miscarriage and you go and visit your mom who lives in Oklahoma where, where abortion's legal, and then you get questioned as to whether or not you had an illegal abortion. You get in that. That's a. Could you imagine? No, it's crazy. So lose your kid and you're heartbroken. That's one.

[Adam]

So that's like a perfect example. Right? Like, so you listen to him and you're listening to the podcast and it's like, okay, like he cares. Right? Like so he cares about. But then you think, but you just voted for the guy who made that happen.

[Danielle]

Exactly. Which is why he does that.

[Adam]

It's so. But it's.

[Danielle]

No, see, that's. I'm gonna say something and I'm gonna sound so condescending. But to me, and I know other women who are listening to this, the fact that you don't get this is what's so frustrating. By him saying that and saying, I have a heart and I care about this and then him voting for Trump, it gives people a pass to say, well, wait a minute, Joe Rogan really cares about that and he voted for Trump, so therefore, he must understand that Trump isn't going to do that, or Trump is still, you know, he's a good guy and he'll understand. And he believes in what Joe Rogan believes. It's all a fucking farce. And he. And that is the problem. Right? And you know, and one thing that. There's this YouTuber that I listen to who I really like, and one thing that he says that I truly believe, and I'm gonna get so much shit for this, but I've already gotten a ton of shit. He says, let's not forget, okay, by someone like you. By someone like people like you who say, oh, but Joe Rogan this and Joe Rogan that and Charlie Kirk this or Megyn Kelly that or whatever Trump is being.

[Adam]

Wait, I take offense to that. Before you go on.

[Danielle]

Yeah, yeah, go ahead.

[Adam]

I never say, but Joe Rogan this, Charlie Kirk that, and Megyn Kelly this. I've never.

[Danielle]

You literally just fought me on Charlie Kirk for how long? And you're listening to Joe Rogan telling me why you listen to him and that it's not for these other reasons, but you are literally giving him a platform.

[Adam]

I'm. Because I listen to him. I'm giving him a plate because I'm one of the listeners. Right, okay.

[Danielle]

Yeah. And you're validating him. The more listeners he have, has, obviously, you know, the more that everybody thinks this and it's the majority, and so therefore, people don't understand. I, you know, but he says by doing this, you are upholding Trump. You are. You are oil changing Trump. You are keeping him in a position.

[Adam]

Of power by listening to people like.

[Danielle]

This, by saying things like, you know, he's a good guy, so he must have some kind of understanding about what Trump is about. And, and he's, you know, he must not really. He voted for him, but. But then I can vote for him, too, because I think that abortion at six weeks, you know, after six weeks is obviously, you know, like, I don't believe in making a woman, you know, not have an abortion before six weeks or carry a rapist baby or this or that. So I can still vote for him because Joe Rogan said it's okay, and it is so fucking dangerous. And Joan Rogan knows exactly what he's doing. Exactly what he's doing. I know.

[Adam]

Do you think he's doing that today?

[Danielle]

My God. He knows exactly what he's doing. It is the same reason why he didn't push back to Trump on anything except a little bit on January 6th.

[Adam]

I was very disappointed in that episode.

[Danielle]

Oh, you listen to it?

[Adam]

Yes, I did. I did.

[Danielle]

Yeah.

[Adam]

I was, I was expecting more pushback, more of a fight, and that was very disappointing. Yeah, but, but, but, but, but you complain about me listening to this stuff, and they're my last, My last bit of defense, and then I'll stop. I promise you. I, I didn't vote for him, so I listened to all this stuff. I take in the information. I'm not persuaded into, you know what I'm saying? Like.

[Danielle]

But that doesn't give you a pass. That doesn't give you.

[Adam]

Because, because I'm giving him the platform.

[Danielle]

Because you're giving him the platform. I. Sir, I truly believe that some of what you. Look, the argument we just had about Charlie Kirk. Right. Other arguments we've had concerning things that I don't think should be arguments. I am having to fight you on things that I know you hear on these platforms. And look, and I, like I said, I don't want to fight my husband in that stuff and I don't want.

[Adam]

To fight you on this.

[Danielle]

But you are.

[Adam]

Okay, but my, and what I'm saying.

[Danielle]

Is, I, that's not a marriage. I want to be. You know what I mean?

[Adam]

Like, yeah.

[Danielle]

And I'm not, I'm not trying to threaten any. I'm not trying. I'm just saying, like, I don't, that's not what I, I don't need that. I don't need to be fighting. I have, we have enough to fight about within our marriage, about stuff that is real and necessary and growth and evolution. And I'm not fighting you against what you heard on Joe Rogan or, or Charlie. Like, I'm not doing it.

[Adam]

No, I don't blame you. And I would, I, I wouldn't want to bring home anything I heard on anything that I listened to. And there's so much that I hear that I would never instill in my children or you or. So.

[Danielle]

If I have to roll my.

[Adam]

Eyes, if I listen to that stuff and listen to the things that you're talking about, does that.

[Danielle]

Why do you need to listen to that?

[Adam]

It's just enjoyable, aren't there?

[Danielle]

I mean, can't you listen to Neil DeGrasse Tyson? But.

[Adam]

Because when he's on Joe Rogan, I love the conversation. When Brian Cox is on Joe Rogan, it's three hours. I love the conversation. I Love what they're talking about when Stand up comics are on that. I don't listen to it for Joe Rogan. I listen to it for the conversation with the guest that I enjoy.

[Danielle]

All right, I'm gonna say a few things and then you can make your decision.

[Adam]

That's, that's my. I'm done. That's my point.

[Danielle]

I just, I, you know, I just don't. And if you listen to that other stuff, I don't even know like, what is that other stuff? And are you going. I don't even know that because of Joe Rogan and because of the, the type of intense, intensely testosterone based things that he puts out into the world. That something that is not like that. You know, it's almost like taking a hardcore drug and then I ask you to take Tylenol instead or something much easier and you're sort of like, that's not. I can't listen to that anymore. I can only listen to the cocaine based stuff because I just figured it out.

[Adam]

Well, I just figured it all out right now.

[Danielle]

Concerns.

[Adam]

It should concern you. I think something like a Joe Rogan podcast is like the broest of the bros podcast possible.

[Danielle]

Did you just figure that out?

[Adam]

That's not my point. The point is I don't have very many bros anymore. I don't see friends. I don't go out. I don't like, I don't have guys in my life. Hearing what's going on. Hold on, before you raise your hand. Maybe that's kind of supplementing the fact that like I'm hanging out with the guys kind of thing. That's it.

[Danielle]

It's not even funny though, because that's exactly what he feasts beasts on. You do realize that, right?

[Adam]

Okay, yeah, but there's a little bit of reality.

[Danielle]

There's. Well, sure, because there's a whole generation of young men who feel like they are not being seen. Right. They are not being valued. They don't know. They don't feel like they have a place right now. And he is allowing them. He is giving them a place to come and hang out. Look, it's like the big brother, you.

[Adam]

Know, what kind of guys, like, who.

[Danielle]

Was like the 18 to 26 year old guys, 18 to 30 year old guys who again, they didn't go, you know, they're not out of college, they don't have a career, they don't have any anywhere to go. Their parents are telling them to get out of their basement. You know, all these people who are like, I don't know where I fit in. But I. Joe Rogan is like, you fit here.

[Adam]

But I feel like those are the kind of guys that are like, bros and frat guys and like, yeah, let's go, you know?

[Danielle]

Okay. But they're not. They don't have anywhere to be bros and frat guys. They didn't go. They didn't go to college. They didn't even go to Community. Like, they don't know what to do.

[Adam]

You mean like, like a. Like a single guy living in their parents basement?

[Danielle]

Exactly.

[Adam]

They're like, lonely.

[Danielle]

And Joe Rogan says, you don't know where to go. You come here, I will take care of you. And I see you, and I know that you love the MMA fighting, and I know that you love these conversations, and I know that you need some bro talk and, and all of that. And, you know, and if you look at his. His statistics, first of all, less than 10% of his guests are women. And most of those women are people who are talking about factually based stuff. Right. So they're talking about science or they're talking about, you know, something that happened in history.

[Adam]

Does it, does it count, by the way, if I listen to the podcast with a woman, Andre Rogan. Because they're phenomenal, the women that he has with.

[Danielle]

But what I'm saying is they're all factually based. He's not talking. He had Miley Cyrus on once to talk about, like, being a female pop star or whatever. He did do that. I. I haven't listened to the episode. I will admit I have not. Other than that he doesn't have women talking about, like, the female experience.

[Adam]

No, but he has intelligent, smart women on who I. I love listening to.

[Danielle]

Great. But they're not helping you understand the female experience.

[Adam]

No, they're helping me understand.

[Danielle]

He is literally having less than 10 on because he needs to have women on. And I truly believe that. Or else he would have 50. 50. Why not? Why not?

[Adam]

Yeah. I agree with you, by the way. I'm not saying this as something that I'm defending. It's. If he had women on to explain the women experience, that would degrade the show.

[Danielle]

All right, I'm gonna give you some statistics, okay? For Joe Rogan listeners versus regular men, okay. Because obviously most of his listeners, the majority, are men.

[Adam]

Wait, Joe Rogan listeners versus regular men.

[Danielle]

Versus, like, the general public of men. Okay, so just Joe Rogan listeners versus the general public. Men in the general public. So the entire American population in that, you know, of that gender, watching women's sports is not as exciting as watching men's. 72% of Joe Rogan male listeners said said that's true. 44 of the general public of men said that is true. Okay. Beauty means thin. Okay. For women, beauty means thin.

[Adam]

Okay, wait, who said that?

[Danielle]

This is just a statement that they asked Joe Rogan listeners. Men. Joe. Male Joe Rogan listeners. In contrast to people that they asked in the general public, men that they asked who are just in the general public. Why is that so confusing?

[Adam]

I don't know. A little confused. It's, it's.

[Danielle]

They asked.

[Adam]

It was nothing else Rogan, but the listeners.

[Danielle]

Correct male listeners of his.

[Adam]

Okay, I'm here.

[Danielle]

They took, let's say, you know, a couple thousand Joe Rogan listeners and asked them. And then they took a couple thousand just general public men and to see, you know, what they think. Not non Joe Rogan listeners. So what did I say? Beauty means thin. 45% of Joe Rogan male listeners said that's true. 20% of the general public men say that's true. So you talk about, you know, okay, cryptocurrencies are the future of online financial transactions. 40% of Joe Rogan listeners said yes. 15% of general public men.

[Adam]

Oh, that's an interesting one.

[Danielle]

But I trust newspapers to print truth. I trust newspapers to print truth. Okay. 10% of Joe Rogan listeners said yes. Male listeners. 40% of the general public male population said yes.

[Adam]

What's your answer on that?

[Danielle]

I think that the thing with Joe Rogan is that they are his only sort, their only source.

[Adam]

No. Do you think reading a newspaper, you're reading all truth?

[Danielle]

I don't think you're Absolutely not. Absolutely not. But I think you're absolutely reading more experts in truth than on a Joe Rogan podcast. When Joe Rogan has no doctor experience whatsoever and feels that he is the number one name in the COVID world, that is something we should all fear. Right? And that is what he does. And so, you know, I think reading a, you know, a New York Times or even a Wall Street Journal, who I barely ever agree with, you're gonna at least get some of the expert information. The thing about the Joe Rogan listeners is that they are not going and listening to other sources. They are low information voters, and all of their information comes from Joe Rogan. And that is beyond dangerous. Especially when he says things like, it is insane to have an abortion ban that is six weeks or less. And he still says, but I'm going to vote for Trump anyway.

[Adam]

Even worse, just imagining having to cross state lines and finding a place that it is legal and then if it is in that state, you're being tracked by the government through an app and all that stuff that was all done because of the Roe v. Wade.

[Danielle]

No shit. 63 off to the States. 63,000 women a year have died since the Trump abortion ban.

[Adam]

Insane.

[Danielle]

And, and, and this is the thing that Joe Rogan would never say that God forbid. And a few other things about Joe Rogan that I'm gonna say.

[Adam]

You're prepared.

[Danielle]

I am. I am prepared as I always am. You know, there was an open letter to Spotify to crack down on the COVID 19 misinformation. Right. And however you feel about vaccines, I sure hope Joe Rogan wasn't the place that you were getting your information or at least I hope you were offsetting it by a whole lot of other, you know, experts. And there were signatures of more than a thousand doctors, scientists and health professionals. Spurred by the growing concerns over anti vaccine rhetoric on the audio apps hit podcast Joe Rogan Experience. The medical and scientific experts slammed Joe Rogan's track record for airing false claims about the coronavirus pandemic vaccines and unproven treatments, calling it a sociological issue of devastating proportions. Spot. And they said Spotify was enabling him. You know, lots of people pulled out of the app they would no longer be associated with Spotify. Spotify also in trying to preserve their placement with Joe Rogan, knowing that he is very very known for his racial slurs, for his racial bias biases and for oftentimes in the past advocating for scientists who believe that African Americans have a lower intelligence based on their genealogy. They have removed over 113 podcast episodes and counting from the archives so that nobody would find those episodes. His most of his audience are heterogeneous Christian conservatives, atheist libertarians, centrist pundits and neo Nazis. Rogan has also entertained the musings of far right. And I want you to look this guy up after we get off the podcast. Has entertained the musings of far right provocateurs like Milo I can never say his last name Yiannopoulos and Stefan Milunics. I don't know how to say their last names. Two of the handful of Joe Rogan guests who promote the long debunk again race science belief that African people of African descent have lower IQs. Rogan suggests in an episode that people who are marginalized for being like generally dumb people, if they transfer over to another gender gender, they get praised. There are a lot of people who are Idiots, but then become trans, and now all of a sudden, society thinks they're amazing. Yeah. I mean, it just can go. I mean, I have so much stuff. You know, he. He puts up people who, you know, look, he makes it look like he's a curious guy. Right. He wants to have these conversations, but he doesn't push back on the things that might be. And in fact, he. Sometimes he's such a conspiracy theorist, and he loves those conspiracy theories that are so exciting to him that he intensifies them.

[Adam]

Yeah.

[Danielle]

And, you know, and it's just. He has a platform of. I don't know, what does he have? 80 million listeners, 90 million listeners? And, and, and it's. It's dangerous, especially for people where this is their number one source of data. Okay, so you had said that there was somebody or maybe multiple people who I quote, unquote, listen to who bother you, and I would love to know who. It's only fair.

[Adam]

I know. I don't. I don't want it.

[Danielle]

I just want to hear who and why. No, I just want to give you an.

[Adam]

I am not a fan. Fan of Rachel Maddow. I. She. Again, I. I don't know enough to back up my statements. I'm sure she says a lot of wonderful things. I'm sure she's on the right side of many issues. Just watching her reminds me of watching Fox News on the right. The way that they speak. Maybe not what they say, but their facial expressions, their. Their tone, their almost like a. When you watch. When you watch the news, the way that some of these people speak, the condescending tone or the complete frustration on whatever side that they're on. She comes across that way to me. And look, she said some things in the past that have been completely wrong that have not. About the. About the COVID vaccine.

[Danielle]

What did she say about the COVID vaccine?

[Adam]

You're ready, aren't you?

[Danielle]

Well, I am. You're ready to back it, bring you facts, everything. And this is what really bothers me.

[Adam]

Said how when you take the vaccine, the virus stops with you. That's not true.

[Danielle]

Okay.

[Adam]

She said if you take the vaccine, you cannot.

[Danielle]

You can literally on the vaccine train. Huh?

[Adam]

Well, that's the only thing that I know about her that I know is something false that she said.

[Danielle]

So you're saying in 30 years of broadcasting.

[Adam]

I know. Look, I know. I know. And this is just something. When I'm watching, I don't. I. I can't. I can't complain.

[Danielle]

Any other things that she said?

[Adam]

Well, I Remember her on the news saying, take the vaccine because when you take the vaccine, the virus stops with you.

[Danielle]

And what was it that wasn't true?

[Adam]

That if you take the vaccine, you can still spread Covid. You can still get Covid. You can still.

[Danielle]

I'd like to look up the stats on that, but.

[Adam]

Okay, please do. I mean, that was said. That was. She said that live on the news. Right. And it was never a point of contention of.

[Danielle]

How do you know What? How do you know it was never a point of contention?

[Adam]

I did research that.

[Danielle]

That. You research that, but not the stats behind it.

[Adam]

Yeah. I only go so far.

[Danielle]

Okay. Okay.

[Adam]

So. So listen, I. I'm sure what she.

[Danielle]

Thinks is a danger to society in that retrospect.

[Adam]

Yes. Mostly. Probably not. I just don't like. Like what I said before about Bill Maher where I think he's kind of like condescending it an in. Like. But, you know, I still enjoy watching him. That kind of thing. I. It's okay.

[Danielle]

So what women newscasters do you like better?

[Adam]

I don't watch the new. Like, I don't watch. I don't know.

[Danielle]

What women in politics do you prefer.

[Adam]

To her in politics? Nothing. There's. It's.

[Danielle]

You don't know any women in politics.

[Adam]

In. I know Kamala Harris. I know.

[Danielle]

So you hate Rachel Maddow, but I didn't say. I hate her suggestions in. In. In place of her.

[Adam]

No, of course not. No. I don't have a recommendation of somebody to put in place of her. I'm just saying if she's on and I am viewing it, I not a fan. That's all you said?

[Danielle]

No, I asked you who do you not like that? I like that is a. Is an influence to me.

[Adam]

But that's the only one that I could think of. I mean, I don't know otherwise.

[Danielle]

Okay.

[Adam]

She's an influence to you. Right?

[Danielle]

I respect Rachel Maddow. Yes. But I respect a lot of. I respect a lot of newscasters who I also know are not as. I don't think any newscaster is always correct.

[Adam]

Right.

[Danielle]

By any means. And I do know that. I do think that. Yes, I do think that Rachel Maddow is brilliant. I think she's a wonderful storyteller. I think she's a badass. And I love that she is somebody who you can rely on in times that are really rough.

[Adam]

Okay. And again, I could be 100 wrong, and that's fine. And I will if I need to do the research, if you need to explain to me like that's fine. I'll, I'll do it.

[Danielle]

I don't need to explain it. If you said to me, you know, here's who I really like and maybe you could, you know, I like when you tune into this person or when you listen to this person, but you're not giving me any.

[Adam]

But that's the problem is like I don't watch anything live. I don't watch.

[Danielle]

So you only watch one woman who you don't like?

[Adam]

I don't watch her. It's like if you're watching and it's on or like I'll put the news on while I'm doing work on my computer and not really paying attention. Like I don't watch live tv. So no, as far as the news goes, no, I have nobody that I can. Men or women. Like, it's not a, you know, a male, female issue.

[Danielle]

Well, you listen to Bill Maher, you listen to John Stewart, you listen to Jimmy Kimmel.

[Adam]

John Stewart. Ivish is with him.

[Danielle]

Yeah, okay, fine. But I'm just saying you, you tune into all their shows.

[Adam]

Yeah, but again, I mean, I guess more to your point, they're all male dominated shows, right? Like every, every tonight, you know, late night show, there's no, there's no women except for like the Daily show and they, they flip between different broadcast. You know, some women, some men, you know, because since Trevor, Noah, that's because.

[Danielle]

There are so many men who say they don't like the females on the news and so they only watch the men who are on the shows. And so they can't put a woman in those spots. They tried with Joan Rivers and Johnny Carson got so angry about it that they had to stop her show and she was really the last one to go on, on, on late night. So again, we have so much hate for this. But these are all the, you know.

[Adam]

Does it count that the women guests are people that I enjoy watching in love?

[Danielle]

Fine. I don't know how to, you know, I don't know how to. It's going to look like I hate you for having the one opinion you have or whatever. But again, what I'm saying is you're mentioning one. Look, I could tell you 12 men in politics, not politics, but in, you know, political commentary who I think are great. You can't tell me two women in political.

[Adam]

But I can't tell you two men either.

[Danielle]

Yes, you can.

[Adam]

In pal.

[Danielle]

In politics, in political commentary. Absolutely. Bill Maher, Joe Rogan.

[Adam]

I don't look at him as like a political commentator.

[Danielle]

He is A political commentator. He just got a president elected. So that's not. That doesn't add up. So basically, we both thought that this episode was going to be easier than last week, obviously was even harder. And, you know, and again, it's going to be a rough week for me because of it. But also, I think that we're tired. And I'm tired of, you know, pretending like we're supposed to just be okay with certain things when obviously, like, it's not benefiting us in any way. And I think maybe it's time to listen to your wives who say, I don't think it's a great idea for you to listen to Joe Rogan. And again, Rolling Stone did a. A thing where they asked women how many of them like their husbands listening to Joe Rogan. Over 70% said that they do not like their husbands listening to Joe Rogan. And almost all of them said that it's a huge turnoff for them when their husband does. I mean, I had you scroll through last week. If I had you scroll through this week, thousands of responses that I got to who is a voice who you don't like that your husband listens to? I would say one in three were Joe Rogan. Tucker Carlson was a lot of them. Jordan Peterson, who I don't even know, was a big.

[Adam]

You never watched Jordan Peterson? Never watch him.

[Danielle]

I don't want to watch him.

[Adam]

I watched him. I don't know what the fuck he's saying. Oh, well, anyway, I can't understand him.

[Danielle]

A lot of people said, Fox News people said, you know, the men who he hangs out with in his life, the general male brain, rotten Facebook, many of his peers are conservative. You know, like, just, just. There were a lot of similar type things. But I will tell you, the women were all basically like, I cannot stand that my husband listens to Joe Rogan. And I think maybe it's a sign that you guys should listen. Right? Just listen. We all want to have better relationships with our spouses. If you came forward and said to me, you know, this is somebody who. I truly think if you said to me about Rachel Maddow, if you really could come at me and say, I think that she is dangerous for you to listen to, I think it's really, really bad. I think it's affecting our relationship, which I don't think is what you're saying, is it?

[Adam]

No, I don't think so.

[Danielle]

Right.

[Adam]

I don't have.

[Danielle]

Yeah, right. And does your husband listen to Joe Rogan? About. About 30% said definitely yes. 40% said, not that I know of. 15% said he dislikes Joe Rogan, and the less said, no, no, he doesn't listen, but he still likes him. If you both said, yes. If you said, yes, does it bother you? 27% said, yes, I hate it. 25% said a little. 40% said, not at all. And the rest said. 12% said, I like Joe Rogan too. So 12% listen all side briefly describe what it is that truly bothers you about Joe Rogan. People say Joe Rogan is a. And my husband isn't. I don't know why he thinks Rogan is funny. Joe Rogan is scum. He needs his mic taken away and not additional listeners. Sometimes he's an idiot. That's when the sound of his voice bugs me. Toxic masculinity, false information under the guise of a joke than the Trump endorsement. I feel like he can sometimes be chauvinistic. It was the COVID Ivermectin thing. My husband knows I don't like him, yet still frequently listens. Joe is a negative influence on people that he makes look like a positive. We used to listen, but then he turned to the dark side. You know, all the. I can go on and on and on. If you said it bothers you, would you also say you find it to be a turn off? 60% said yes, so almost the same as yeah. And then do you think your partner would be open to agreeing to not listen anymore if you explained to them? 30% said, I think so, 35% said they would listen anyway, and the rest said, I really just want them to listen to other people more. And then I wouldn't mind it as much.

[Adam]

Do you know anything about his wife? I don't. I'm just curious.

[Danielle]

No, I know she's rich as. Yeah, I don't know anything about her.

[Adam]

Okay, okay.

[Danielle]

Okay.

[Adam]

That wraps this one up.

[Danielle]

These are really hard topics. And, you know, I think if people were talking about it at home and having real honest conversations, they'd realize how far hard it is. It's really hard. And. Yeah, so just, you know, I'm gonna. I know I'm gonna get it. I'm gonna get it in all kinds of ways. So I just wan.

[Adam]

All right, thanks, guys. Goodbye, Sa.