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- [00:00]
A
The wild, wild West. Hey, guys. Happy New Year. We're here kind of an off week, but figured we'd hit you guys with a little best of 2025. We got some great stuff, man, some good clips lined up. Before we get into that, I just want to say again, happy New Year. Thanks for watching. We are entering the, unfortunately, that kind of podcast crucible again. Shane is going to be gone filming for a little bit, but that's nothing to get glum about. We're going to be jam packed with super hot guests and a lot of good times. It'll probably make the next year's best of 2026. We'll see. However, you know, I mean, let's just recap what would happen in 2026, man. You know, we got a lot of wars going on. There's that. We have a lot of wars, which, you know, not good. It's not good. There's been Israel, Palestine, which I believe is a ceasefire. So shout out to politicians for the ceasefire on that. And also Russia, Ukraine, maybe that'll come to an end. And hopefully not Venezuela. But, you know, bright siding it. It's like, look, guys were getting busy, all right? Guys were doing stuff. No one was sitting on their ass this year. People were unfortunately fighting and killing hundreds of thousands of people. But, you know, that's. Maybe next year we can just kind of like, do other stuff instead, but keep that same. Can do fire and spirit. But, guys, I near come here to talk about war. I'm just recapping the year 2025 wars. Okay, fair enough. Um, what else happened? What else happened this year? Big things that happened. We had, you know, Donald Trump is still the president and we'll see, man. I think. I think his sizzle is starting to kind of fade. It's like, you know, he. The quiet piggy. That was definitely him pushing himself up there in the headlines. Aside from that, it's like DJT is not hitting as hard as he used to. I think we're finally used to him. So he's got, I don't know, a couple more years left and I don't know, I think. I think we're. We're on the cusp. And I'm again, I'm just bright siding New Year's time horizon. I think we're on the cusp of finally, as a country stepping out from under Trump's shadow, which has really, you know, if you love him or hate him, whatever, but he has loomed over this country for a decade. As long as this podcast has been going on, which is crazy. 10 years Trump has been just, you know, a central fixture in the news. And I think he's gonna fade, man. And it's like, as much as people love him or hate him, it's like, I honestly don't know what it's going to be like without the guy, because in my opinion is like, are we going to get like a Trump 2.0 or, you know, what are we going to get? We don't know. I'm excited. I can't wait to find out in 2028. But we'll have to wait for two more New Years to find that out, so we'll see about that. Stay tuned for two more years. Another news we also have. AI is booming right now. And, oh, boy, another hotbed of controversy as well. AI. Apparently, it's getting better. There's billions, maybe even trillions of dollars being spent on AI research. And, you know, again, another thing people love, people hate. My thing is, if you're worried about AI coming and taking your job, I don't. You hear all this all the time. It's like, well, what if AI takes my job? What am I going to do then? It's like, dude, let it take your job. There's no shame in a machine built by billionaires taking your job from you. What do you. You think you're going to. You're not going to do better than that. It's like, let it have your job. Let. You'll just be like, let the state figure out your life for you. You know, if you. If, if I'm saying if AI takes your job, that is not. That's nothing to stay awake at night about being like, oh, it's like, there's nothing you can do. Like, just let it come. Take your job. And it's also like most. Most of the jobs it would take would probably be like office jobs, which are mostly fake jobs anyway. So why would you worry about a machine built by billionaires taking a fake job from it? You're not even really working. Let it have your fake job. Just give it say, here, here you go, computer, you can have my job. I'm going to go outside now. And now you go from sitting like a fat ghost in an office to now you're outside. You get the sunlight on you, and now you got to go find food. Which in my opinion, is much more exciting than sitting in front of a computer and pretending to work in front of pictures of your kids, which, imagine if those kids could actually see you pretending to have a job to pay for them. That's embarrassing, dude. Let the machines have your job. Say, hey, machines, come and get it. Let them come in and take it. Now you're on the outside, you got to go find food. And here's my thing, you're gonna say, all right, well, how the am I gonna find food? It's like, I don't know. But if the AI came and took my job and like all my work friends job and you know, unfortunately even my work wives jobs as well, I'd start a militia, you know? You started. You don't. A peaceful militia, obviously, but it's like you go from sitting on your ass in an office every day with that, just groveling to your fucking boss, hoping they give you a little promotion, and that's. Fucking hell, let the computer wipe that out. Now you're outside, you're doing push ups, you're doing burpees. You and your friends can set up a little barbed wire crawl space. You can crawl through, do drills. And if you get like a few hundred people to do military drills in your front yard with you, I. My prediction is the government will start giving you food because they'll be like, hey, guys, just here, here's some food. And you don't have to be like a, you know, I'm not saying become like a terrorist cell. That is not what I'm saying at all. We don't need any more of that. I'm saying do push ups in your front yard with all of your office friends. You guys are all in the office now. You're in front yard, you're working, you're maybe digging little trenches and just kind of like, I don't know, just fucking find food. It'd be so much more fun to go and find food than sit in an office, you know, that's if AI takes your job. That's my whole point. So don't worry about that. We had AI, we had endless wars. And what else do we have? I don't know. I think they cloned. They didn't clone. They made a false embryo in or a false womb in Australia. So science is going, you know, we have, we have a false womb for a kangaroo to be born in. That's nice. Why don't we take it to one of these beautiful clips? Hold on, guys, Check this out. I didn't know you got. You were that drunk. We were on the plane together.
- [06:23]
B
Do you know why scuba divers, you know how they sit on the boat and fall backwards?
- [06:26]
A
Yeah.
- [06:26]
B
Do you know why they do that?
- [06:28]
A
Look cool.
- [06:28]
B
No. Because if they fell forward. They would land in the boat. Come on, guys.
- [06:40]
A
Classic highlight reel 2025.
- [06:43]
B
Market joke world clip it.
- [06:46]
A
Highlight reel 2025. Just run that back 25 times.
- [06:49]
B
Yep. That's what we'll do for the New Year's episode. Over and over for three hours, you fall asleep to going to laugh every time you're going to try to sleep, you.
- [07:04]
A
Oh, man, that was hilarious. And now we're back to the special New Year's edition, guys. We talked about. We recapped 2026, you know, whatever. Or 2025. I'm sorry about that. Sorry. Sponsors recap. 2025. I don't know, man. Like, what else is out there? Recently, I actually just discovered that there's a thing that women experience. It's called a false pregnancy syndrome. Or a woman will convince herself that she's pregnant to the point where her breasts start to lactate and her belly expands as if there were a child inside of it. There was recently a case. It was this year, actually. Shout out 2025. There was a case this year of a widow. Her husband had died. She was an old lady going through menopause, and her husband unfortunately died. And somehow her body convinced her that she was pregnant. So she. Her breasts swelled with milk, her stomach started sticking out, and she even thought she felt kicks. And. And the lady went to the doctor to be like, what the hell? This is a miracle. Maybe it's my dead husband being reincarnated in my old withered womb. And turns out she went to the doctor and she just. Her stomach was full of gas and it was moving around her stomach. But she, thinking those were baby kicks, stimulated her milk gland somehow to produce milk for this baby that didn't exist. And the doctor had to tell her, like, no, you just have a bunch of farts. You don't have a child. You have a bunch of farts in your stomach and your husband's dead. Get over it. You. You're not pregnant, you old bitch. Go home. And like, damn, that person for sure was probably like, I can't wait till 2025's over. 2025 is kicking my ass. I missed my husband so much that I became fake pregnant and farted in the ER just to be told that I don't have a baby. I just have a big fart in my stomach. Oh, man. Poor lady. This episode is brought to you by Montana Knife Company. Did you know there are a little over a hundred Master Blade Smiths in the world? No, I didn't, because I'm not a virgin. Well, Josh Smith is one of the best and he's the founder of this company. Designed, tested and built by hunters. All of MKC's knives are manufactured in Montana. Like my personal favorite, the Speedgoat 2.0. It's ultralight and insanely sharp. They're a hunting knife company first and foremost, but MKC also makes some of the best chef knives on the planet. I use them all the time in my kitchen. Plus they're backed by a multi generational guarantee promise, meaning you can send them back to be sharpened whenever you need, free of charge. Starting to think about Christmas gifts? Montana Knife Co. Knives are the best presents out there. But don't wait until December to order. They sell out fast and always sell out before the holidays. So get yours now and give a gift that can be passed down for generations. Montana Knife Co. Working knives for Working people This episode is brought to you by Mint Mobile. Head to mint mobile.com trench to score three, six or 12 month unlimited plans for just five. $15 a month limited time offer upfront payment of $45 for three months, $90 for six months or $180 for 12 months. Plan required, $15 per month equivalent taxes and fees. Extra initial plan term Only greater than 35 gigabytes. May slow when network is busy. Capable device required. Availability, speed and coverage varies. See mint mobile.com and they also have this thing too called Kuve syndrome where guys now, you know, we got, we talked about the girls. Now it's guys time. Guys. Apparently I've never met a guy like this, but apparently it's a real thing where when a woman becomes pregnant, the man starts to like, biologically mimic some of the pregnancy response in the women. Like, for instance, when a woman gets pregnant, there's this thing called nesting where like, when they're pregnant, they'll go around. It's like a real instinct. They'll go around and start like setting up the house. Like, they organize the house like a bird with a bird's nest. They'll start like moving stuff, redoing the closets. They get like, bins and they start putting things in bins. You know, stuff like that. And. And guys now apparently will like. Or they're saying they'll start mimicking those responses even to the point where the guys will gain weight. Some of the guys even claim they feel a baby kicking in their belly, which is like, they don't. First of all, it's definitely gas. Second of all, never. That's even if you're mimicking your Wife's pregnancy response. Never say that out loud, dude. Just fucking. Just. It's. It's not. First of all, it's not real. And second of all, like, dude, don't never be like, I think I'm pregnant, too. I. They don't respect that. Just be like, nah, I'm not even. If anything, I'm just, like, harder than ever. Looking at that fucking baby in your belly. That's something women can respect. Honestly, don't tell them, like, my nipples are kind of sensitive too. Dude, that's fucking disgusting. Take it to the grave, man. If your wife's pregnant and you're like, I think I'm sort of pregnant. Don't do that, man. Got these guys going to the doctor. It's called Kuvade syndrome, which is like, oh, it's fucking brutal. I'd rather have a guy hold me down and finger my butt and tell someone about that than come up to my friends and be like, you know, I started actually mimicking my wife's pregnancy symptoms as well. You know, just don't do. Don't talk about that to anybody. Keep that to yourself. All right? Like, oh, my. My breasts are actually a little swollen. Dudes will gain weight a lot. There's guys waking up with morning sickness. It's like, dude, what the. It's not. You're just. Your stomach hurts. Stop pretending you have a fucking baby. I don't know why people or guys and girls are like. Are having fake pregnancies is like, just stop, man. It's fucking. That's really weird. And it's really unbecoming of a man to try to get in on pregnancy glory. That's all I'm saying. It's not. That's not your stuff. Again, just to recap, I would rather have a guy hold me down. Whether he, you know, pinned me down by my arms, on top of me, or just kind of, like, knocked me over. Like a stone cold stunner came around my back and just started fucking blasting my butt with his. I don't know. However he gets it, he gets it. Maybe we're just both lying on our side. He trips me. We're, like, lying on our side, like, on some side, side, doggy or whatever. I don't know, guys. Let's take it to a clip. I didn't know you got. You were that drunk. We were on the plane together.
- [13:35]
B
Do you know why scuba divers, you know how they sit on the boat and fall backwards?
- [13:38]
A
Yeah.
- [13:39]
B
Do you know why they do that?
- [13:40]
A
Look cool?
- [13:41]
B
No. Because if they fell Forward, they would land in the boat. Come on, guys.
- [13:53]
A
Classic highlight reel 2025.
- [13:55]
B
Market joke world. Clip it.
- [13:57]
A
Joke road highlight reel 2025. Just run that back 25 times. Yep, that's what we'll do for the New Year's.
- [14:05]
B
Just that joke over and over for three hours. You fall asleep to it, but you're gonna laugh every time. You're gonna try to sleep and you go.
- [14:17]
A
All right, guys, that was something else. Hey, let me tell you guys about something on the way here, right? I'm coming to my office. I'm like, I'm just, you know, driving peacefully. But I can't wait to do this Best of 2020, 2025 compilation for, you know, the fans out there. They're gonna love this. Can't wait. As I'm driving, I, I also got a Christmas present from my brother, Shout Out Billy. I got a nice Stratocaster. Yeah, Stratocaster. I'm not thinking no Telecaster. My bad. And so, yeah, I'm driving my Telecaster, my new Princeton reverb amp that I went and got from Guitar Center. Shout out to the guys down at Guitar Center. That's really. Dude, I'm not trying to act like the man, but I know when I walk into a Guitar center, they're my, there's my, my true core fans. Every time I go into a guitar store. Sam Ash Guitar center, it's nothing but the bros, dude. Nothing but the bros. Always hook it up. Thank you guys. And yeah, so that was nice. Walked in there and I got my Princeton reverb amp, which is what Billy told me to get. And so, you know, I'm driving. It was at my house. I'm driving it to my office so I could have it here in my creative workspace. And, and I'm driving it. So I had to drive kind of slow because I have an amp, a pretty big amp. It's sitting on my, my seat. I don't want to like hit my brakes really hard because, you know, it's like a tube amp. They explained to me. And they can break easy. So I'm like, all right, let me drive carefully. So I'm coming to a four way stop sign on the way to my creative workspace from my living space. And so I'm driving here and I, I hit the brakes, like coming up to the stop sign slow. Cause I didn't want to jam them and have it fall over and, you know, break one of those tubes. So I'm like kind of easing on the brake. And meanwhile, at the intersection like across from me there was an old man in a Subaru and he, or no, he was coming like perpendicular so he was this way. So I came to a stop, like too slow for his liking. And I'd like pulled up to an intersection with an old man, a Subaru giving me the stank eye. And I don't know what it was about that, but it just like, you know, I was already, you know, it's been the holidays, I'm like, me and my wife and kids are just crammed in the house, it's all day, non stop, blah blah, blah. So I'm a little cranky, you know, I'm a little bit cranky. Obviously I'm stoked to come here and do the best of 2025, but like I'm a little cranky, man. I'm a little fired up and I take a taking a 40 plus vitamin that has Tongata Lee. So my tea is kind of going nuts and like I pull up to this intersection with this old man in a Subaru looking at me like he's about to beat my ass. And I just like he was giving me this, he was going like sitting there, he's just going like I pull up to this guy just going. And I look at him like the are you gonna do? And I literally out my window, I said, what the are you gonna do, old man? You ass Subaru. I'll you up in that Subaru. And I was like, that's not me. I'm leaving that me behind in 2025. Because I really for a second was hoping that the old man would get out of the Subaru and I would do. I would literally fucking bash his head into the winch. I would have killed this guy. I know, it's disgusting. I don't want to. I'm not trying to do that kind of shit in 2026. But like for a second I was like, dude, if this old man gets out of the Subaru, I'm not saying I'm the toughest guy in the world, but an old man in a Subaru in Austin, dude, I could British bulldog his head right through the fucking passenger window easily. I would have left this guy in a bloody discarded heap on the side. I would have drove over his concussed body. I was so fucking angry. But he drove off and you know, I calmed down, cooled off, made it to my creative workspace and I don't know man, it was just something about that old man in a Subaru flexing on me. I'm like Bro, like, again, I'm not the toughest guy in the world. I'm not out here looking to fight people, but like an old man in the Subaru, just giving me the nastiest look. And what I wanted to tell him was, like, dude, I have a tube amp in the back of my crv. If this falls over, it's going to be pretty costly. Costly to repair this. And all I'm doing is breaking slowly, taking my time to get to the stop sign. And you're looking at me like I'd already run it. You're charging me of a crime I didn't even commit. And now you're looking like you want to fight. It's like, I'll fucking fight you right now, dude. 2025, leave this shit behind. We'll both move on. Maybe you won't make it to 2026. It was a pure lib spaz. That's all it was. And again, my, you know, whatever about politics. We're done with those. But like, an old man lib in a subaru probably has 47 potted plants in front. Libs. Old libs love putting 97 potted plants in front of their fucking houses. It's another thing, man. Get them out of the sidewalk. I'm trying to walk. Put them in your backyard. You don't need 40 fucking fern plants outside of your house. Nobody gives a shit. It's 40 fern plants of Ruth Bader Ginsburg sticker on your window. Get a fucking garden. Put it in your backyard. Put those plants. You have a backyard. I know the layout of the whole neighborhood. Put them in your fucking backyard. Don't have 40 potted plants. And drive around your Subaru giving everyone the stank face because you clearly see, I mean, dare I say a Silver Fox Alpha coming. You know I have a Princeton Reverb in the back of my CR V. You want me to break a fucking tube? And I'm like, let me just come to an easy stop. You're going. The fuck are you? I'm like, excuse me, sir. Fucking excuse me. Or. Anyway, guys, that's not good. Guys, let's go to a fucking clip. That story sucked. I didn't know you got. You were that drunk. We were on the plane together.
- [19:44]
B
Do you know why? Scuba divers, you know how they sit on the boat and fall backwards?
- [19:47]
A
Yeah.
- [19:48]
B
Do you know why they do that?
- [19:49]
A
Look cool?
- [19:49]
B
No. Because if they fell forward, they would land in the boat. Come on, guys.
- [20:02]
A
Classic highlight reel 2025.
- [20:04]
B
Market joke world. Clip it.
- [20:07]
A
Highlight reel 2025. Just run that back 25 times.
- [20:11]
B
Yep.
- [20:11]
A
That's what we'll do for the New Year's.
- [20:13]
B
New Year's episode. Over and over for three hours. You fall asleep to it, but you're gonna laugh every time. You're gonna try to sleep.
- [20:26]
A
Oh, man. We're back, dude. Also, guys, please make sure to, like, comment and subscribe. And when you comment, it really helps the algorithm. It just boosts us into the algorithm and makes us more. More people can access this kind of content you love and know and love. So. All right, so we talked about the old man in the Subaru, and it's like, I've already moved past it, man. I forgave him instantly. It's just, you know, it's just. God damn it, I hate that face when you pull up and someone goes. It's like, how dare you question my. You don't even know what the I'm doing, dude. Acting like I'm. I should. I should have just veered my car, ran it like, no, you go ahead. And this one crashed his Subaru. Anyway, guys, enough about that. What else I want to talk about. Also, I played basketball yesterday, first time. And, man, I can't remember. It's been a long time, but as you know, I. I've been training, man. Look, I don't talk about my training that much, but I've been training pretty intensely. And, you know, so I'm just up at the basketball court yesterday. It's a little cold, a little windy. Not ideal conditions for, you know, an outdoor basketball court. But my goal this year in 2026, is to become something of, like, a street ball legend in my white and Asian neighborhood, which I honestly think I could, man. I was up there yesterday shooting around on a windy day, just totally stroking myself, like, I don't even know why. Just being like, of course I'm the only person out here shooting on a windy, cold day. Just different. Every car that would drive by in my head, I'm like, this is the hottest housewife possible. I'm going between my legs. I'm shooting the three. I'm air balling. I'd be like, all right, let me just. You know, maybe she didn't see that. It was. It was pretty pathetic display, now that I'm saying it out loud. But I'm out there and, you know, I'm shooting around. I'm getting warmed up, and, you know, I got the apple watch on burning a surprising amount of calories, and I'm like, yes, this is. You know, this is not a Bad little workout, man. I'm gonna. I'm gonna try to, like, you know, get to really know this court. Kind of feel these rims out so that, you know, I can become a street ball legend. Just up there all the time. And I'm playing, shooting around, and these two young whippersnappers, these two kids come up high school. I didn't realize they're in high school. They're seniors in high school. Came up, I see him shooting around, and I'm like. And, you know, again, nothing against them. They just weren't really that good at all. And I was like, bingo. So I'm gonna play these kids in 21, just demolish them, Go as hard as I can, because I'm finally. And again, I've. I've. I've always, like. I remember being young and seeing the old man on the basketball court, and even back then, I'd wonder, like, I had enough weird, I don't know, foresight or curiosity to be like, it's got to be crazy playing basketball as, like, an old guy. And I'm finally, like, yesterday absolutely confirmed it. I'm finally the old man of the basketball court. Dude, if it felt kind of. It's everything I thought it would be, put it that way. I've always wondered, like, what's that like? Dude, it's literally, it's. It can't get better. So I'm sitting there, I'm shooting around. I see the young kids. I let them warm up. I'm not gonna. I know I'm not gonna be all warmed up. 20 minutes in, shooting around, running back and forth, full court, really going behind my back whenever a Volvo passed me, just hoping it was like a super hot housewife for their kids. Be like, God damn. Behind my back, through the legs, pulling up threes, dude, just raining them. And see these kids, let them get warmed up. And, you know, and again, I'm thinking, I'm going, I should ask them to play 21. I do this a lot. This is something I'm getting away from in 2026. But in 2025, I'll, like, want to ask. They're kids. I want to play basketball with them. Takes me, like, 10 minutes to work up the gumption to be like, hey, you kids want to play some 21? So I'm like, you know, I'm sitting there, I'm shooting around. It was like a. My. My. My mind, like, hijacked my body. I didn't even know what I was doing. I was like, you guys want to play some 21. I just yelled it across the court and I just. They just both look at me like. And like, we don't know how to play that. I'm like, oh, here. And I gave him the rules. It's pretty much like one on two when you have the ball, and then if you make it, you go to the foul line, shoot, you know, from the wherever is a two. If you shoot from the three, that's a three. Fail shots are one point. If you make three foul shots in the row, it's your ball and you get to go again. Started playing 21, and I don't think. Here's. Here's the thing. This is the joy of being the old man at the basketball court. Those kids were playing. I wasn't playing. I was like. I was like fighting time and death itself. When you're an old man at the basketball court, you're battling time. The kids are like, oh, we're playing each other. It doesn't matter who I'm playing against. I'm raging against my mortality playing these kids on the basketball court. I went so, so hard on these kids. I. I feel bad about looking back on it. I was like, I shouldn't have done that. I went so hard driving. There was one point again, this is where my training comes in. You think like, oh, why should I train? I'm 40 years old. I'll tell you why. You should train, you know, lift weights and do all that. There was one point. I'm driving in. It's two on one. Obviously, it's the nature of the game. 21. I'm going to lay it up. Both of them fail me. And again, I'm not bragging. This is just what happened. Both of them failed me. I lifted both children up on my arm and laid it up, no problem. And it took everything in me not to look them in the face and go, you like that, you little. I didn't. I said, oh, man. Oh, don't worry about it. Went to the point, you know, I might have done a little in one, but whatever I was, you would have thought I got shot out of a volcano, just fly, soaring through the air with children on my arm. These are high school seniors. Hold it. Maybe what, you know, my head. I might be dramatizing a little bit, but it was like I felt them try to pull me down, and I just fucking ripped through these children and laid it up, made it and one. And, God, I ended up winning again. It's not about that. If I lost, whatever, But I did win by A lot. And no, actually that little one little kid started coming back. I started getting nervous. So good, so good, so good.
- [26:12]
C
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- [26:23]
A
How did I not know Rack has Adidas? There's always something new.
- [26:26]
C
Plus, join the Nordy Club to shop new arrivals first. Unlock exclusive discounts and more. Great brands, great prices. That's why you Rack. This episode is brought to you by State Farm. Listening to this podcast. Smart move. Being financially savvy. Smart move. Another smart move. Having State Farm help you create a competitive price when you choose to bundle home and auto bundling. Just another way to save with a personal price plan like a good neighbor. State Farm is there. Prices are based on rating plans that vary by state. Coverage options are selected by the customer. Availability, amount of discounts and savings and eligibility vary by state.
- [27:08]
A
But I was like, wildly and completely out of breath. And after I finally won, I got, I got to 21. I think the second place kid had like, he was creeping on me. He had like 15. So he was. I had a sizable lead for a while and I just gassed and I eventually got it back to kind of, you know, it was pretty windy, so my, my jump shot was getting taken by the wind as well as me missing. So I was kind of just like pulling up like four feet away and hitting little like floaters. So finally I finally win and I'm completely out of breath. I'm shattered. Dude, my apple watch. I don't know if you track, you know, your fucking calories, you burn. Dude, I burnt 668 calories in less than an hour. Which. Go test it for yourself. It's, it's really, that's, that's a lot. Like if you do a standard hour 20 minute lifting thing, you might burn like 350, 400. I burned 668 on these kids. 668 calories of megawatts, whatever the they are fat molecules exploding in my body to just defeat these children. Again, wasn't even about them. I'm battling time, death, my body failing. I could feel like my ankles like, ah, like everything hurts the whole time. And I beat these kids and, and I don't know what possessed me to do this, but I went and got my ball and I was like, thanks for playing, guys. And I was like, oh, man, I'm turning 40 this year, guys. And they just both looked at me like, oh, whoa, that's Cool. And I was like, yeah. They're like, wow, man, that was. You played pretty good. And I was like, thanks guys. Well, I'll see you up here again. And I don't know why. I just like told these children I was 40. It was a very, it reminds me of the time when me and my cousin sold lemonade at the bottom of our, we had a shared driveway and we like a mailman pulled over, bought lemonade off us and just told us his like life story, all his troubles. Now I'm like, yeah, I get it, man. Something about it, man, you just want to like, I don't know, it's, it's a shame you get such a bad rap for hanging out with kids because honestly, if I, and again, it's like, I'm not like that, like, if any of that funny stuff. But like, I don't know, man. I wouldn't mind chilling with kids if I'm being honest. Like, I, I feel weird around adults. I do. If I'm like at a party with adults, it's like, yeah, I don't know. But if, like, dude, if you could just drop me at like, you know, like a 12 year old's, I don't know, 12 year old's birthday party, I would for real vibe so hard with like 12, 14, 17 year old kids and just like, you know, play flag football, do a slip and slide, you know, if we gotta wrestle, whatever, I would wrestle them on my knees to be fair. But like, I don't know, I like no pedo on me. I'm just like, it's so, it was so fun just balling out with these kids yesterday and you know, I, I hope I see him again on the court. I hope I ignited a little fire in their bellies. Because I mean, dude, if I was, if I was a high school Senior and some 40 year old was giving me the business and I, I, I'll be honest, I could have been a lot more physical, but I let him taste it. Every now and again. I would drive and be like, okay, you want to get how you like that? But I did my best not to just try to like, physically overpower because that's, you know, it's kind of coward. I'm not sitting here tooting my own horn, but I'm stronger than a couple kids. But like, they did try to hold me down from jumping and I leapt through the air with them holding on to me. And I'll never forget that. That was so nice, dude. Just to go home. That was a nice feeling. But, guys, let's check out one of these clips. What do you say? Best of 2025. I didn't know you got. You were that drunk. We were on the plane together.
- [30:43]
B
Do you know why scuba divers, you know how they sit on the boat and fall backwards?
- [30:46]
A
Yeah.
- [30:47]
B
Do you know why they do that?
- [30:48]
A
Look cool.
- [30:48]
B
No. Because if they fell forward, they would land in the boat. Come on, guys.
- [31:00]
A
Classic highlight reel 2025 market.
- [31:04]
B
Joke World Clip it.
- [31:05]
A
Joke World Highlight reel 2025. Just run that back 25 times. Yep. That's what we'll do for the New Year's episode.
- [31:14]
B
Over and over for three hours. You fall asle, but you're gonna laugh every time. You're gonna try to sleep.
- [31:25]
A
Oh. All right, guys. And we're back. Big year 2025. What else we had. We talked about some of the geopolitical stuff, also the comedy world. Bit of a hotbed. A lot of turmoil going around the comedy world. A lot of. A lot of comedian infighting, which I'll say one thing I'm. I'm grateful for in 2025 is to not. Not have gotten caught up in any of that kind of turmoil and kind of just like, this guy, that guy. It's like, man, I feel like a younger me could have, you know, because you see that that stuff gets a lot of attention. And unfortunately, you know, I am in the business of eyeball flickers myself. And it's. It's tempting to be like, you know, who I hate and, you know, and all that stuff, but a lot of that stuff going on, man, it's been. There's like comedian versus comedian. There's YouTuber, verse comedian, there's comedian versus YouTuber. And it's like this endless swirl of just kind of negativity that we can't fucking keep our eyes off. And I've said it before, Cat Williams, cr. I mean, he's, you know, obviously this is older than him. It predates Cat Williams and probably Santa comedy itself. But, like, he blew the lid off the jar when he. He's spilled the tea. It was. It was a. That. Was that 2024. 2025. I don't know. Let's. I'm going to put that in 2020 in the 2025 bucket, because that couldn't have been more than a year ago. That seems like that was so 2025. That is not so 2024. But I think, man, we might have even, like, started the year that might have been like the January dude that we started. 2025, because it was the Will Smith slap. That was so. That was 2024. The thing that finally stopped, that was the Cat Williams tee that set the tone for 2025. And, dude, I don't think we've ever recovered that got 30 zillion views on the Shannon Sharp podcast, which, you know, kind of launched his podcast. And then Shannon Sharp had a bit of a strange year as well. A lot of sexual stuff. And I think he's. That's crazy. It's crazy to get so much that Disney's like, dude, we got to cut ties. That's way too much. Yuck. We're. You're killing it right now. He got so much that Disney was like. Like, he's getting so much pussy that he's, like, hitting his phone. You know when you fake call somebody or you, like, accidentally pocket dial? Yeah. It's just usually you just, like, walking through the grocery store, like, fumbling your keys in your pocket. Shannon Sharpe's getting so much pussy that when his phone bumps to, like, call somebody or go live, which was suspicious, it's just him digging out a lady, being like, oh, God. Oh, Shannon Sharp got so much pussy in 2025 that Disney dropped him. And I think he's fine. But my whole point was Cat Williams on the podcast Blue Lid Off It. And I don't. I don't know if it was that or what, but there I. I did start to see that show. I saw people come on that show trying to get their Cat Williams moment where people are trying to, like, you know, give the sensational take and, like, this guy, that guy, blah, blah, blah. And no one ever, you know, it was lightning in a bottle. No one ever recaptured the cat crack off on the tee. But then I. I noticed, you know, there was lot of other little comedian beefs and, you know, this and that, and a lot of people just, like. Even when I meet people who don't. Don't do comedy, they're always asking me, like, you know, what's this guy like? And who's your favorite? Who don't you like? Blah, blah, blah, blah. And I. I gotta say, man, like, I do find it unfortunate that there is this fascination with comedians as, like. Like, any sense. Like, they're. This guy's a piece of shit because they did this. This guy's like, the best. Because it's like, dude, comedians for real are. They're just like. I don't know. They're like, mostly, myself included, they're just like theater dorks. They're like a strain of theater. Dork that it's like, yeah, you didn't go full theater dork and do, like, musicals, but that's in you. That's your thing. And it just, like, whatever that is has gotten mutated to where now you do stand up instead of, like, musicals. But it's like, you're kind of the same guy as, like, a musical theater dork. You just, you know, you wear a leather jacket and smoke and stay up late, and you're like, I'm a comic. You never understand my life. But you're a theater dork, man. And I. It's just so funny to have all this attention trying to dissect comedians and be like, this is what they're really thinking. This. It's like, in 2025, I get it. But for 2026, it's like, dude, this is for real. You have to look at every comedian like, here. This is what it's like when people, like, comment and want to be like, this guy said this, and they're a hypocrite and I'll no longer support. Look, man, I hate to break it to you, but it's like, it'd be like if you watch the Spirit Special Olympics and you're like, what the hell? That guy's not even. It's like, yeah, dude, they're. Just let them swim, all right? Just let them swim. High five them, and if you don't like it, just turn it off. You don't watch the Special Olympics and be like, what the. Man? This guy's not even. That's not how you do the backstroke. Yeah, dude, his. He's missing a leg, dude. All right, this guy's not all there. Let him do his thing. If you don't like it, tune it out. But it's like you're. You're barking up a fucking burnt down tree, man. You're not gonna get anywhere by tracking them. Thoughts and opinions of me. They flitter and fly around. You're. This is a guy panicking, saying, whatever it is, that'll just get him through another hour of the week or the show or whatever, so he can sell fucking digital picture frames. Don't look into it that much. That's all I'm saying. It's like watching the Special Olympics or, you know, the WNBA or whatever. Let's fire up a clip, guys. Go to it. Like, comment and subscribe. This episode is brought to you by Prize Picks. Trying something new can be intimidating, whether it's building a new routine or making your first team pick. But when it clicks, when you're right. It feels incredible on Prize Picks. It's good to be right. With high pressure playoff matchups every weekend and elite hoops actions almost every night, the action never stops. And Prize Picks lets you take control. Now with Team Picks, there's even more on the app to choose from. Discuss a new feature. Want to pick teams in the college football playoffs? Now you can on Prize Picks. I love making team picks on Prize Picks. I just noticed this new feature a few weeks ago because we live in Texas. Prize Picks now let you pick winners, spreads and totals in the biggest games when you click on team picks, which is right in your prize picks app. Nice. Team Picks are now available on Prize Picks in Texas, California, Florida and more. And for the prizepix OGs, you can still make all the player picks lineups you want. Just pick more or less on at least two player stats. If you get your picks right, you could cash in. Download the Prizepix app today and use code drench to get 50 in lineups after you play your first five dollar lineup. That's code drenched to get 50 in lineups after YOU play your first five dollar lineup. Prize picks. It's good to be right. Hey guys, we're back. All right, so we're back here. Classic. We never get sold. What else? You know what I want to talk about today? The. I was reading about the Soviet calendar back under Stalin when they eliminated all the days of the week. Like they still had like the months and stuff, but instead of the days of the week, they did a five day work week where they took away like Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and replaced the days of the week. This was, you know, Soviets, the Soviet Union under Stalin. They replaced the days of the week with like, like instead of Monday it would just be like loaf of bread. Tuesday was star, then Wednesday was hammer and sickle. Thursday was just like burlap sack. And then Friday, I swear to God, Friday was like, it was called pointed wool, military cap. That was your Friday. And what they did, I swear to God, look it up. And what they did was it was this five day work week. And the idea was for the machines to never stop. They were like, hey man, if we want to make this dream come true, we, we can't be like all taking off on Saturday and Sunday and having the machine stop. We got to keep this, you know, the industrialization or whatever just plugging along. So they purposely gave like wives and husbands and brothers and sisters and families different days off. So like if your day off you didn't have Like a weekend. You just work all the time. It was never ending shift work. And then, let's say, like, on, like, you know, Loaf of Bread Day, you were given off, but your wife was off on Woolen Military Cap Day. And for, like, a couple years, everyone just lived this weird existence where the calendar was perfect, purposely stripped from, like, any religious connotation. They didn't want Sunday because that, like, you know, Sunday technically was about God and resting, and that put something above the state. So they took all that stuff away for a couple years. No one got to really even see each other. That all of the holidays were stripped out. They. They would give you a day off for, like, the day of the day Lennon was born. I don't know Some, but he might have came later. I don't even know. But my whole point is they had this thing where they try to genuinely replace a calendar for several years, several years, and it's just everyone is miserable. No one could see anybody. You would have off, and no one else you really knew would have off. You would just sit there your whole. You just sit by yourself alone on your day off. And eventually what happened was the machines from never, like, getting to stop, basically, and, like, cool down, the machines all started to falter and break. And eventually the machines started getting up. So the Soviet government was like, all right, guys, we're gonna let you see your loved ones again. And they. They allowed people to start seeing each other, and then, you know, it's kind of fake as hell. You know what I mean? They're like, we see you. We heard you. But it was just the machines collapsed. That's so sad that, like, they, like, pretty much dehumanized their population just to have the machines never stop producing crap. Which is funny, because I thought communism was more about, like, chilling, just, like, kicking up, you know, kicking with the homies and. No, it was just all about the machines. And the machines collapsed, and then they got to go back to the standard Gregorian calendar. So, I don't know. Pretty chill, I guess. But then the whole society collapsed after that, shortly after, and. I don't know. Now it's Russia's. Just Russia fighting, I guess. You know? I guess from Russia. I don't think they had a good year at all. A lot of people died, so. Million, they say. A million people. Jeez Louise, that would piss me off. I was Russian. Like, that wasn't even true. Someone just talking mess, being like, you know, like, a million guys died in Russia. And I'm like, no, we didn't. Probably you think it's a million? I. I'm under the impression that Russia is winning the war. But look, let's not get bogged down in 20, 25 conflicts, guys. I just thought that was cool, the idea of just like, trying to, as a government, upend time itself, to be like, we're in charge of how you view time. And it's like, what a crazy thing to do. It's just so crazy to get that into politics. I was recently, we had a nice little game night. You know, me, my wife, some other couples, and someone there found out that I had never voted before, ever. Until, like, my wife dragged me to do it this year. And they were, they were like, they had a pretty serious, like, that's like up. You've never voted. And it's like, look, if you want to vote, fucking vote. But like this whole idea that, like, you can somehow embed politics into like, your identity and the core of your being. I don't know, dude. It's like, it's fucking weird. Just don't. Just fucking don't do it. The whole point of the government is to make sure there's like, food and roads so you can go and do the stuff you need to do to get food. Being into that, it's. It's like being stoked on the dmv. That's the government, it's the dmv, it's the capital. And it's just like all the weird human beings were like, I represent that. And it's like, okay, dude, like, cool, go do that. I'm glad you do that. But all these people thinking they can like, wrap themselves up in like, any a political identity left and right. It's like, oh, man, I hope that stuff falls by the wayside soon because it is so unbelievably lame to just get into that. I don't know, people ask, you never voted? It's like, yeah, because I've never. Every single president I've seen, I've been like, this person's a freak, you know? And it's like, I guess I'm kind of a freak, but not like that, man. If I was, if I was president, I don't know, I would go classic, like school president style. Soda machines everywhere. That's probably. While we're in debt. That's probably why we're in debt. We're. We're in debt. I don't know. What's the debt? Like $90 trillion. It just keeps growing and growing. The first thing I would do as president is say, hey, Guys, we've been in debt long enough. Let's cancel the debt. They could do that. I think they could do that. And they don't. So it's like, I'm not voting for anyone until they say, hey, guys, you know that $90 trillion we're in debt? Let's just say, fuck it, I'm the government. The debt is to the cut. No, it's probably to other countries. Whatever. Just call the other countries and be like, dude, you really gonna hold me to the fire on this, man? 90 Trill. Can we just forget about this? Can we just all chill, please? It's so lame. 40 trillion. Yeah. $40 trillion. The interest on that every year has got to be. There's no way. Once you're. Once you're in a loan set up for $40 trillion. Like, what is that? If I'm guessing, these people who own this debt are getting at least 3%. So let's. Let's do. Let's. Let's see if we ever can get out of this, because I don't. I honestly don't think we can. So here we go. So we have. I don't even know if my calculator. I got to hold it sideways. These are big dog numbers here. Hold on, we're entering big dog numbers. 41, 23. Okay, 40,000. 1, 2, 3. 40 million. 1, 2, 3, 40. Billy. Okay, I'm at $40 trillion. Let's go times 0.03. Let's. Let's say we're doing 3% interest, huh? Let's see. 3% interest equals. Oh, okay, we. The interest we're accruing on $40 trillion of debt is $1.2 trillion a year. We're never getting out of this. They got. This is embarrassing, dude. $1.2 trillion and you're gonna have a guy every four years be like, I'll tell you what, I'm an old fashioned kind of guy and I get it. Shut the up. Every year we owe one the debt, it grows. If we just pay our payments, we pay the minimum, which we probably do. 1.2 million more. $1.2 trillion more dollars. So, you know, next time someone's going to be like, well, you should vote. It's like, dude, get the debt down. Then I'll fucking think about it, right? Otherwise, what am I vote. It's a fucking bullshit puppet show. Unless we can get out of. I'm embarrassed. Every time I travel to another country, it's all I can think about. I just go, fuck. We're really in the hole for 40 trill. Is that really. That's 3%? One point. 1.2 would be 3% of 40 trill, dude. Trillion. So it looks like we have a little bit of a higher interest rate too. How much grew by 2 trillion? Jeez. Oh. And how. How does it. I've said this forever. If you're in. If you're in charge of running any enterprise and if you fell into. Let's just say you're in a company and you fell into $1 billion of debt, you would think people would start looking around and go, well, hold on a second Here we are $1 billion in debt and no one's gonna stop at, we were $40 trillion in debt. Once we hit a trillion, you're telling me nobody in this highly capable, like, million person machine turned and went, we gotta figure out how to get. And if they didn't, it tells me that debt is just a contrived thing that's totally meaningless anyway. Because you always hear that you're like, well, you know, your grandkids are going to be, you know, 350 million people with a $40 trillion. Our great grandkids are going to owe 20 bazillion dollars. And it's like, what the. No, they're not. They're never going to. Like. It makes absolutely zero sense to say that's going to stop us in any way, shape or form. Unless it's like, all. Does our tax money go to paying the debt? I have no clue. All I'm saying is when AI takes your job, right? Forget about the debt. At that point, you should say, all right, like, AI taking your job. You know what I was thinking about today, and I don't know if this is like a good thing or not. It's sad, it's scary. It's kind of like, what am I going to do with myself? But then maybe, you know, I'm bright siding. Obviously, the cotton gin kind of freed the slaves. It wasn't like the bleeding hearts of people was that we came up with a machine that kind of. We're like, okay, we don't need all these slaves. AI could be the cotton gin of fat, frumpy office workers. That's all I'm saying. How nice would that be? How nice would that be? I don't know. Whatever. Anyway, guys. Yeah, I think that's. Yeah, let's fight. Let's do the final clip. And guys, this is a good one. Check this out. I didn't know you got. You were that drunk. We were on the Plane together.
- [49:07]
B
Do you know why? Scuba divers, you know how they sit on the boat and fall backwards?
- [49:10]
A
Yeah.
- [49:10]
B
Do you know why they do that?
- [49:11]
A
Look cool?
- [49:12]
B
No. Because if they fell forward, they would land in the boat. Come on, guys.
- [49:24]
A
Classic highlight reel 2025.
- [49:27]
B
Market Joe Gro clip it jokes highlight reel 2025.
- [49:31]
A
Just run that back 25 times.
- [49:33]
B
Yep.
- [49:34]
A
That's what we'll do for the New Year's episode.
- [49:38]
B
Over and over for three hours. You fall asleep to it, but you're gonna laugh every time. You're gonna try to sleep.
- [49:48]
A
Guys, 2025 was amazing. We recapped it. We had a lot of fun. I had a lot of fun. Everyone had a lot of fun. And we also cried. 2025. We cried. We grew. You know, in 2026, you know, my goal is to really become more social. I want to get out there, you know, and here's the thing, like being more social, it's not about just going to parties and getting fucked up. It's about genuinely getting to know other people and embedding themselves. Embedding yourself into their lives in a real way. Which I plan to do. I just. My problem with that is I'm just really only interested in my own life. So that's a, an obstacle I'm trying to overcome. Just because when I talk to people, I don't even think I hear them. They talk to me and I'm just going like, dude, I gotta drop like 10 pounds and get shredded. I don't hear anything anyone says to me ever. Every time someone talks to me, I can do like 30 seconds of another person talking to me before I'm like, dude, if I get my bench to fucking 280 and I get my squat to 350, I'll be at the thousand pound club pretty soon, guys. But let's, let's end this on a nice. On a nice note. Enough about that. You know, it's the new year. It's one of those things where we start thinking about time. A year has passed and we start going, what's going to happen in the next year? St. Augustine, or St. Augustine, however you say his name. He has a famous quote on time. He wrote a whole essay on it. I'm going to read you guys a little selection on. We're going to close this out big with a quote from St. Augustine on time. So here, here's the quote. What then is time? If no one asks me, I know. If I wish to explain it to one that asketh, I know not yet confidently I say, I know that if nothing passed away, there would be no past time. And if nothing were coming, there would be no future time. And if nothing were, there would be no present times. Those two times, then past and future, how are they when the past is no more and the future is not yet? As for the present, if it were always present and never passed in a past time, it would not be time, but eternity. If then the present is time only because it passes into the past, how can we say that it is, since the reason why it is will not be? In other words, can we truly say that time is only because it is tends toward non being? And yet we speak of, quote, a long time and a, quote, short time. And we say this only of the past or Future. We call 100 years ago, for example, a long time in the past, and a hundred years hence a long time in the future. But a short time in the past. We might call, say, 10 days ago and 10 days ago, hence a short time in the future. But in what sense is something long or short that does not exist? He's saying the future and past is. Does not exist. For the past is not now and the future is not yet. We should not say of the past quote, it is long, but it was long. And of the future it will be long. Hmm. Let's jump down here. Hmm. Okay. Behold the present time, which alone can be. Which alone we found could be called long, is narrow to the space of scarcely one day. But let us discuss even this. For not even one day is entirely present. All the hours of night and day 24 make it up. The first of them has the rest future, the last has the rest past. And one in the middle has past hours before it, future after it. And that one hour passes in fleeting moments. Whatever of it has flown away is past. What remains is future. If any portion of time be conceived which cannot now be divided into even the minutest particles of moments, this alone is what we call the present, which yet flies so swiftly from future into past that it cannot be extended by any delay. For if it is extended, it is divided into past and future. The present has no space. Where then is the time which we call long? Is it future? We do not say it is long, for it is not yet so as to be long. We say it will be long. When then will it be? For even then, when it is still future, it will not be long, because what may be long is not yet. But it will be long, when from the future, which is not yet it shall have begun to be and shall have become present, so that then it can be something long. But instead, as we said before, the present cries that it cannot be long. Hmm. What then do I measure? Where is the short syllable by which I measure? Where the long which I measure both have sounded, flown, passed away, are no more. And yet I measure, and confidently answer, inasmuch as the rule of measure, as there is a rule of measurement, that as to the space of time, the syllable is single, that double, and I could not do this unless they had passed and ended. I measure not themselves, therefore, which are no more, but something in my memory which remains fixed in the O my mind. I measured times. Do not overwhelm me with noise. Do not overwhelm myself with a multitude of thy impressions. In thee I say, measure times the impression which passing things make on thee, and which abides when they have passed. That I measure as time present, that is what I measure. Or perhaps I do not measure times, but the impressions. Behold how my life is at extension. And thine right hand hath upholded me in my Lord, the Son of man, mediator between the the One and us, the many who are in many ways distracted, that through him I may apprehend in whom I have been apprehended, and may be gathered together again from my old days, following the One, Forgetting the things that are behind, not distended, but extended, but to things which shall be and shall pass away, but to those things which are before, not distended, but extended. I press toward the prize of the high calling. Wow. What a quote did you get? That makes perfect sense. Guys, have a great new year. Let's get it one more time. Fire back up. I didn't know you got. You were that drunk. We were on the plane together.
- [56:08]
B
Do you know why scuba divers, you know how they sit on the boat and fall backwards?
- [56:11]
A
Yeah.
- [56:12]
B
Do you know why they do that?
- [56:13]
A
Look cool?
- [56:13]
B
No. Because if they fell forward, they would land in the boat.
- [56:17]
A
Wow. Wow, wow, wow, wow. Wow. Wes.
- [56:26]
B
Come on, guys.
- [56:27]
A
Classic. Highlight reel 2025.
- [56:30]
B
Market joke world. Clip it.
- [56:33]
A
Highlight reel 2025. Just run that back 25 times.
- [56:36]
B
Yep.
- [56:37]
A
That's what we'll do for the New Year's episode.
- [56:39]
B
Just that joke over and over for three hours. You fall asleep to it, but you're going to laugh every time. You're going to try to sleep.
- [56:48]
A
You go watch new episodes of Matt and Shane's secret podcast on Spotify. Do it.
- [56:59]
C
Did you know you can opt out of winter with VRBO? Save up to $1,500 for booking a month long stay with thousands of sunny homes. Why subject yourself to the cold? Just filter your search by monthly stays and save up to fifteen hundred dollars. Book now at vrbo.com.