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- [00:00]
A
Foreign. Welcome to the Maxwell Leadership Podcast. We are committed to adding value to you today. This episode is designed with you in mind because we want to impact you, add value to you so that you'll go multiply value to others. And ask you a question. Was there ever a time when you are finished but you really wasn't finished? In fact, John says it like this. When you're finished, Chris, you're finished. I don't know what part of that people don't understand, but if you stop, you're done. Have you ever thought you were done and then found a second gear?
- [00:40]
B
Yeah. I mean, I think about coming about my third year into Maxwell Leadership certified team, and I was working with an organization that was about 80% of my actual income. And I mean, I was digging my way out of debt. I was just almost getting out of debt and almost to zero. I mean, you talk about net worth being great. 0 net worth is great. Like zero because I was negative, right? So I was marching up that hill. I end up losing this client because the partnership broke up. 80% of my income is gone now. At that moment, I wasn't saving anything and, you know, I was putting everything towards debt. And I thought, oh, my goodness, is. Is this it? Like, I thought that I was doing well enough at this to keep going, and I just found myself at a place where I had make a choice. Do I go and do something that's off track with my goals, dreams, and aspiration, or do I continue down this path of coaching, speaking, and training? Fortunately, I had the wherewithal to. To. To find that extra gear to stay on the path as a coach, speaker, and trainer. And man, if I had turned away from that moment, how life would look so different. I wouldn't be sitting here today with you had I made that other choice. But I found that gear.
- [01:56]
A
So John is going to help all of us because all of us have had that kind of a moment. And John's going to help all of us to establish a belief in today's lesson. And here's the belief, here's the promise, here's the promise of this podcast today. Better days are ahead for you. John's going to teach us how to have that mindset, that perspective to go after that, because that's what we want for you. We want your best to be in front of you and not behind you. Hey, if you would like to follow along with John with a fill in the blank worksheet, we call that our bonus resource. If you'd like to watch Chris and I And the podcast on YouTube. Also, we'll give some other free value ads to in our show notes. You can get the show notes and all of those links@maxwellpodcast.com forward/ahead and you will be able to go take advantage of that. But in the meantime, get ready. Your best days are ahead of you, says John Maxwell. Here is John.
- [03:03]
C
You didn't come this far only to come this far. It's just a great quote. You didn't come this far just to come this far. In other words, no matter where we are in our growth or in our progress and our development, we don't come this far just to come this far. And the debate is there a finish line? And for many people there's a finish line. And let me just say this, if you have a finish line in your life, and by the way, if you have a finish line in your life, it's self imposed, so don't blame it on anyone else, you decided you wanted to quit. So if you have a finish line in your life, and I'm not even opposed to it, I guess I'm not opposed to retirement or things like that. I'm not. It's just that if, if you have one, the moment you cross it, you're finished. And that who really wants to in their life say my best days were behind me. Now because of age, we don't always, we won't continue to have the strength, the energy. I mean, there's a lot of losses that we have, but there's also a lot of assets, a lot of gains and profits that we're given as we age. And so what I want you to do is I just really want you to understand that wherever you are, there's still growth potential in front of you. Wherever you are, your better days can still be ahead. And so people ask me, well, what keeps me moving, what keeps me moving is personal growth and development that I'm still learning, that I'm still every day saying, wow, I had no idea I could do this and I'm gonna try it. And the question is this. And I think the finish line question can be answered real quickly for people. If you live for yourself, you're more apt to have a self imposed finish line. I could still remember my brother who was very successfully financially, I could remember by the time he was 40, he was already worth tens of millions of dollars. He had all the money he ever needed. And I remember him coming out when we were living in California and said, I think I'm just going to retire. And I Said, you can't retire, Larry. I mean, I know you have all the money you ever need. Good lord. But then why. But I mean, really. So I said, why don't you, the rest of your life, make millions and millions of dollars and give it all away? In other words, if you got enough for yourself, it's not enough. It's not enough until you can give to others and help them and make a difference. Are you with me? And so he got back in the game and he's still in the game. He's two years older than me and he's made hundreds of millions of dollars since that time and has given it away. Now, the point that I'm saying is I think usually when we say I cross the finish line, most people that have a finish line, I think they have a finish line because they have what they want and what they need. And I'm not opposed to that. In fact, I want every one of you to do well. I want every one of you to be very successful financially. I want that for you. But there's another level. And I think once that you begin to. Once that you begin to really add value to other people and see how you're helping them, I just don't think there's a finish line. And just keep asking yourself the big question. And the big question is, what's before me? What's before me? Okay, let me give you another quote. Here's another thing to think on, okay? Don't trip over things behind you. I watch people trip over things behind them all the time. In fact, I watch people do a U turn and go back and trip over it again. Do you know what I'm saying? And I look at em and I say, now why would we do that? Well, we, we do that because we've never learned to focus on what's before us instead of what's behind us. Because what you focus on expands. Now, when I talk about. Don't trip on things behind you. I could talk about emotional baggage that you're carrying in your life where you're mad at somebody and haven't forgiven someone and they did this to me and they messed up my life and it's never been so good. And it was a bad marriage. And let's just all. Let's just level the playing field right now. Okay? How many of you have had some junk bad stuff in your past? We all have. It's not like you've had bad stuff and the rest of us haven't. We've all had losses and misses and Failures. Every one of us in this room, every one of us in this room have days that we hope nobody ever knows about. So there's nobody that is above this. We all have stuff that we could trip over that's behind us. The problem is when we allow that to dominate our thinking and our thoughts and control our action. Because what dominates my thinking and my thoughts controls my actions. And so I would just say as a brother, a friend, a mentor, a leader, whatever I am, my name's John. As your papa, I'm just gonna say let it go. Let it go. Let me explain something. If somebody has done you wrong, we've all had people do you wrong. If somebody's cheated you, we have all cheated you. We've all come out on the torch. Let me say something. While you're pissed at them, they're out dancing. Do you not understand this? Can you not get over this? They're out having a good time and you're sitting over there and you're holding these grudges and you're hanging on to this stuff. And I'm just saying if you're going to go mountain climbing, you got to get rid of the junk. You don't take the stuff with you. Are you with me? We don't take it with us. We say, hey, I'm climbing a mountain, I've gotta go as light as I possibly can. Because what we focus on expands. If we're focusing upon the potential before us, it all expands and we have more potential. If we're focusing upon the problems behind us, we just are gonna live and be immersed in those problems. When your memories exceed your dream, your end is near. But when your dreams exceed your memories, you're a pioneer.
- [09:57]
D
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- [11:01]
A
Oh, Chris, I love that last point of John. Those of you that are following along, you're using your bonus resource. It's in your notes. When you, when your memories exceed your dreams, your end is near. But when your dreams exceed your memories, you're a pioneer. And most people think pioneer is a stage of a career. Most people think pioneering is an age of life. John defies all of that at his most successful time, at his oldest time right now than he's ever been in his life. Obviously he is still as much of a pioneer as he's ever been. It's a state of mind.
- [11:39]
B
Yeah, it really is a state of mind. But he truly does believe and live this out of his best days are ahead. And you can see that in his actions. You can see that in the way that he talks. And man, at 78, 79, you know, most people are going, oh no, I'm done, that's enough. And they're living off of these past memories. You know, John talks about the finish line being self imposed and once you cross it, you're finished. I think about this often, especially as entrepreneurs try to come into the coaching, speaking, training space. You know, they put these self imposed deadlines in place like, well, Chris, if this, if I can't get this started as a business within this next 12 months, then this isn't going to work for me. And then immediately I look at them and say, well, you should probably go ahead and quit now. If you got a quit date, like if you've got a quit date now, you got to quit now. Okay? Because there is no finish line to this. But where do you often see leaders unknowingly create a finish line in their life?
- [12:40]
A
Oh man. So, so I got to underscore what you just said. If you have an end date, you're done. Go ahead and make it tomorrow, right? Don't even wait till tomorrow, let's go today. Right? Because you are, you are, you have stopped. If you have a finish line, you stop. You know these, these where I see it most of the time is in retirement. Is, is people feel like that their professional career has an in line. And in fact in some industries and in some professions there is an age limitation. I know pilots age out because they want to make sure that very safe people is carrying people from point A to point are very healthy people are carrying from point A to point A. And I understand all that. That's not what John's lesson or thought is right here. If you get to a place to where you feel you have done, you are done contributing to society, done contributing to others. You have a self imposed, self gratifying focus on life. You want what's easy and best for you. I love what John, he tells the story often. He didn't tell it in today's lesson of his conversation with Tyler Perry. When Tyler kept building a studio, then building another, building another, then he acquired this whole fort here in the Atlanta area and said, I'm gonna build the biggest studio with the biggest landmass ever done. Why? Because he needed to. No. Why? Because his financial situation was in dire straits. On the contrary, he was at the best place of his life. But he said, hey, when you can afford to quit, you can't afford to quit. And I think that's where a lot of people think that if they finish, then they get to relax. No, if you finish, you begin to die. You are literally dead. You just haven't made it official. And I would encourage all of us, especially in that self imposed finish line of when I get done with my career, I'm done. No, you've just begun. It's just now the next season, the next chapter, when I get, when I work my two week resignation out, I get to go and relax and do something. No, you get to now take on the next challenge.
- [14:51]
B
Right? Yeah. I love that. I love that. You know, here John talks about, you know, that time that came for his brother Larry. Now Larry has done significantly well in life. And you know, I've had a chance to meet Larry several times and in fact, I think one of my finest moments, Mark is, you know, Argentina. I got the greatest compliment in the world. And I was so excited for out of anybody in the room, Larry Maxwell came to me and said, Chris, you did an awesome job. That was greater. That was greater than John saying it. That was great. If you all listen, don't know.
- [15:21]
A
That means a whole lot coming from Larry.
- [15:25]
B
And so when I heard him talking about Larry today and having him shift his life right there, you know what separates those who stop, like people that have the means, like Larry, to be able to stop. And then those that shift into significance,
- [15:39]
A
I think it is exactly that shift. Going from success to significance. We teach around here, if you've been on the podcast for long, you know this. We teach that success is what happens for you and significance is what happens through you. Success is all about my gain, my acquisition, my accomplishment. Significance is all about you using those things for someone else's gain or somebody else's accomplishment. So I think one Is it is the shift that life is not just about your achievements. Life is about utilizing those achievements for others. We link that back to purpose. Your purpose is only fully realized when you realize your responsibility to those around you. When people go to make that shift. It's really hard though, the more successful you are because your identity gets wrapped in your success, your sense of worth, your sense of self worth, not your sense of bank statement worth. Your sense of self worth is wrapped in what you do, not who you are. You get most appreciated. You get more accolades, if you will, by what you've accomplished, not who you are. Who you are feels pretty inconsistent or pretty unattractive until you do something dumb. And then it becomes highlights, right? It becomes, it becomes the headlines. So I think that because of that, so many people get their identity in success, what they've accomplished, accomplished, and they don't settle in early in their life before they accomplish a lot, that it really is about who they are, not what they have become or what they, what they've accomplished. If I could help anybody, and John and I, right now, right now we are having an incredible time of every two months meeting with highly, some of the most successful from gain from finance, from position and authority and power, some of the most successful people we've ever journeyed with over multiple events, we've met a lot of successful people, but journeying with. And the question is why?
- [18:00]
B
Why?
- [18:00]
A
What was this all about? Why did we accomplish this success? They're realizing something at this level of success, another million dollars is not what it used to be.
- [18:11]
B
Right.
- [18:12]
A
That another award on their mantle is not really as fulfilling as they thought it was going to be. And so they're asking why? Why does success not satisfy? And in this conversation, we're able to help people understand the only thing that's really going to help you feel that sense of fulfillment is what you do in significance. Here's how John says it's. He says, I've met a lot of successful people that are unhappy, but I've never met one person that's doing significant things that has not found happiness. And I think that's it. I think people are starting and looking and hungry for that sense of fulfillment.
- [18:51]
B
Yeah. Oh my goodness, they are. They are. You know, but a lot of people. So we got the people that are on that far end of the spectrum. They've got wild success like a Larry, like a John, you know, and they've got this wild success and now they're looking for their significance. But you still have people that are trying to find, find their degree of success, but yet they're doing. What John talks about here is tripping over things behind them. All right, so when someone's holding on to something from the past, whether it be hurt, failure, regret, you know, what have you actually seen help people to release that?
- [19:25]
A
Well, we've talked about it a lot lately because John just wrote the book on return on failure. I think the reason people keep stumbling over yesterday's experience or keep making the same mistake that they made last year is because they, they haven't learned a lesson to appreciate it. They haven't learned something that will help them appreciate it. And they keep going back. I think in some ways it's providential. They keep going back because they hadn't got the same lesson. They hadn't got the lesson they needed to get in the first place. We've laughed. I'll share this story now because I think I'm far enough away from my wife that I can laugh about what I'm getting ready to say. She loves the sun. She loves laying out in the sun. She just loves it. And so she's got a girls trip coming up and, and it's going to rain most every day. It's going to rain and, and what it's. Then she goes into this thinking that says it rains every time I go. I never get it. She's dark, she's got all this tan on. She lives in a perpetual state of getting sun. But somehow in moments like this, it's like I never get sun. Well, by bringing up a past experience of raining a vacation out, it now puts in her mind that every vacation is rained out. I can tell you one three weeks ago to where we went and it was perfect weather to the same place she's going now, but she forgot that one and went back three trips ago when it rained the entire trip. That's what we do. And until you reconcile the meaning and the purpose behind a past stumbling block, I think you'll go back over and stumble it. I think you will because you haven't learned the anecdote of failure and is a lesson that will make you better.
- [21:10]
B
Right? Oh, man, I love it. And again, I think John says it, you know, well, there's what you focus on expands. And I remember you sharing with me the, the, the weather that your wife. And the good news is, you know, is that it's going to be sunny some part in there, right?
- [21:26]
A
Yeah. So this was Chris. I showed Chris the, the text that Stephanie, my wife, was lamenting on and I went this is right here, what she's called complaining about his backyard. It's going to be in his backyard. And he went, oh, oh, just tell her it'll only rain some of the day. I said, no, you tell her that I've already tried that positive mental imaging for her. It didn't work. So I'm going let you tell her
- [21:45]
B
that, hey, it's going to work out. It's going to work out. But, hey, what you focus on expands. So, you know, if somebody's feeling stuck right now, Mark, how can they audit where they're focused on? And then what's kind of a discipline that they can use to shift their focus into expanding a better future?
- [22:01]
A
You know, I was talking to somebody this. This will relate to. Better days are ahead, I promise you. I was talking with someone the other day, and they were really having a difficult time with a past experience. Now this person is honestly living their best life, Chris. I mean, ask them, are your numbers up? Yes. Is your lifestyle up? Yes. Are your relationships better? Yes. There's not one area in this person's life that they are not better in and loving life. But the other day, we went back to a season in their life that really challenged them to get where they are today. In other words, let me say it differently. It was a season that did challenge them to get to where they are, but in the moment, it was a season that destroyed everything of yesterday.
- [22:53]
B
True.
- [22:53]
A
Okay. It was tough. And I watched us go back and revisit that because we touched on a relationship that really was a big part of that. And I watched it unravel the thinking, the emotional aptitude, the. The collected sense of. Of great mindset that this individual had. And it just completely wrecked them. It wrecked them for hours.
- [23:17]
B
Wow.
- [23:19]
A
And in recapping it, I said, now, why did that unravel you when we had just five minutes before talking about you're living your best life and you would agree that all of that that happened is what led to your best life? I do, but I don't appreciate that situation. I said, but wasn't it that situation that caused you to unravel where you could reravel and get where you are today? And they went, yeah, but I still don't appreciate the situation. Here's what occurred to me in that moment. I believe the antidote to bitterness, because it was just raw bitterness, to be honest. I believe the antidote to bitterness is gratitude. I believe the antidote to a sense of failure is a lesson learned. And so the reason people go back like we were just talking about are the people that. The reason that people can't change their mindset about something that has happened and see better days is because they've not received the antidote to whatever would cause them to approve. Appreciate yesterday. That helps me reach for tomorrow. You can't be excited about yet tomorrow consistently if you still haven't reconciled yesterday. Because yesterday will keep a weight on you. You'll keep reaching back for it. You'll keep trying to make sense of it. That's why John says, get a return on failure as quick as possible. Get it in your kid's life as soon as possible. Because when you can live life with an appreciation for yesterday, it won't hold you back to where you can go tomorrow.
- [24:43]
B
Yeah, yeah, I love that. I love that. You know, and again, it's holding on to those things and I love how you opened it. Get close to closing with this, though. But John says that when your memories exceed your dream, your end is near. But when your dreams exceed your memories, you're a pioneer. So how does someone evaluate whether they're living from their memories or dreams? And what's one way they can start building a bigger future immediately?
- [25:07]
A
It's anticipation. Okay, so, so I. I was waiting on that ant question. Not because you told me you were going to ask it, but John gets told all the time. And you are the most disciplined person in the world. And you've heard it. You've heard him talk about that. And by the way, you and I have been around him and he's as intentional as anybody that I've ever known. And I don't think he's as disciplined, even though at the surface level and even at the deepest level, it feels like he's got so much discipline. Every day he reads, every day he writes. Every day he thinks, every day he files. Every day he asks questions, and he does it every day. 92 distinct different books bought by 41 million people did not just happen overnight. It happened because every day he does that, okay? And so he's asked all the time, how are you so disciplined? And he course laughingly says, look at Pillsbury Doughboy, I'm not disciplined. If I was disciplined, I'd look lean, like Chris Robinson. I'd look studly, like, like Chris looks. And he says, I'm not disciplined. I just have figured out how to stay in the game. And then, then the follow up question is, well, if you're not disciplined, what are you? And he says, I'm the greatest anticipator you've ever met. I anticipate every day by sitting down and going, if I will sit down today with the great focus of yesterday, the great tangible reasons that what things I use, tools I used yesterday. Imagine what will come out today. Imagine what my next book will be. Imagine what this book will do for the life of somebody. Imagine if I can hurry up and get this book done, how somebody's life and leadership can do a U turn. He always sits down with a sense of anticipation of what he writes. Today is going to be a game changer in somebody's life.
- [26:45]
B
Wow.
- [26:45]
A
Every day. So not only every day does he rethink, file, ask questions, right? Every day he anticipates what's going to happen when he does that and that anticipation creates it. So now back to your question. What's keeping people in a pioneer is the anticipating of what's going to happen with the pioneer. I heard a great story, she used it talking about vision, envisioning. I'm going to use it today to talk about how the great people continue to pioneer. Unknown accomplishment, unforeseen accomplishment, unanticipated accomplishment. It's all with anticipation. Serena Williams, great tennis, great, incredible tennis player. She would do the discipline before every major, before she ever took step on the first match. She would already imagine the posture, the voice, the things she was going to say when she won that match. She hadn't played one. It's going to take 15 matches to win the win the championship. She had already anticipated what her acceptance speech was going to be when they gave her the trophy. She already pictured what she was going to do with the final shot. Whether it was a kill shot or a defensive shot or they actually bummed it and put it in the net. She already figured out what she was going to do. Was it a hands up year? Was it lay on the ground year? Was it look at her parents year, what was going to be the first reaction after she got the accomplishment. Now that's a great lesson on vision. I've used it multiple times to talk about vision.
- [28:13]
B
But you know what else is a
- [28:14]
A
great lesson in anticipation? It's what made her pioneer shots that nobody had ever seen before because she had envisioned, she had anticipated what that shot was going to do in the end. And I've watched some of the greatest performers in whatever industry you want to talk about, their performance was the best in front of people because they had anticipated when nobody was around and the anticipation of the joy it was going to create on that little five year old kid that watched Serena win that Tournament was the thing that carried her through the difficult shot. So my question to us podcast family podcast listeners, viewers, what are you anticipating today? Please don't say nothing because your best days are not ahead. If you're not anticipating, what, what are you excited about? Please don't say yesterday, because if it's yesterday, your greatest days are not ahead. Ask the question, what woke you up this morning? Please don't say it's so that you won't have another bad day like yesterday, because you won't have a better day. You'll have a bad day again. It's got to be that anticipation, Chris. It's got to be that sense of wonder. It's got to be that sense of curiosity that drives us and awakens us and gets us to that next thing. There is none better. And you can attest to this because you and I both have been mentored one on one by John. There is none better at anticipating than our 79 year young founder.
- [29:40]
C
You're correct.
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B
You're correct.
- [29:41]
A
It isn't.
- [29:41]
B
I love it.
- [29:42]
A
Well, let me say this. Speaking of anticipation, I want you to have a purpose every single day. I'm really on a, on a, on a real run right now of challenging our podcast team and our content team to get me something to continue what we started today. For some of you, today was a game changer for you. You went, man, I've just not had the perspective that, that tomorrow can be better, that my best days are ahead. And you're convicted, you're excited, you're now anticipating. And I want to give you access to a product, to a tool that I want to resource with you, with you. I want to resource you with, and that's every day with purpose. It's a product that John used literally to build the model that has led him to 92 books. And I want to offer it to you, I want to extend it to you. It's regularly 200 bucks. I want to give it to you $49. We'll put that in the show notes. I have a listener that I just love this comment, Jim. Jim listened to the podcast the Leadership Lens. How you view things is how you do things. We'll put that in the show note for you. And here's what Jim said. He said it's a great reminder. How we view things shapes how we lead. Our perspective truly drives our actions. Thanks for this powerful conversation, Jim. You're welcome. For all of you that's been impacted today with the concept of anticipation and believing that your best days are ahead. Let's go. Let's build that belief ourselves. Let's go extend that belief to others, because everyone deserves to be led well.