C (11:04)
And see, the thing is, people, they ask sometimes, how is he at home? She said, just like he is on stage. He's the same person. It's not a difference. I'm not putting out a front, you know. You know, I'm the same person on and off stage. Even when I was a kid, I was funny. I was. You know, I was a neighborhood clown, church clown, school clown. I just had fun. I never did anything to hurt anybody. You know, I didn't want to hurt their feelings. Except one girl with that ponytail, if you saw it in that, true. With that little bit of ponytail that, you know, I picked on her today. Then she made me be her boyfriend. She said, you gonna be my boyfriend? So the thing is, hey, man, you know, you don't take all that to. To. To make people laugh. I can sit now and talk to somebody and let's just say I'm in the bank and it's taking a long time. I say, well, I said, what, they working on Turtle today? I said, they pretty slow today, and they'll bust out laughing, you know what I'm saying? Like, I'm at the airport one time, TSA going through everything I got. I said, my man, are you trying to make lieutenant? I said, because what you looking for? It's on the X ray, what I got in my bag. You see what's in my bag, but you want to check everything. You try to make lieutenant. I. I believe that he bust out laughing. He realized. He said, man, man, go on, man. Go, go, go, man. Just going through. You know what I'm saying? So sometime we go too far. You know, we go too far with things, and. And we just need to just keep it at a minimum, man. Do your job. Keep it moving. I go to the airport every week. I fly every week. Everybody in Atlanta airport know me. Everybody except isis. They got ISIS that now. And I don't know what they doing, man. They just standing there looking crazy. They got. Like. I had a police one time pull me over and you. I got a big doula. You got the Drugs in the car. I said, I don't have the drugs. I said, now, I do have some sandwiches in the back. I said, now, I got about 74 subways. I said, now, if that's a crime, you might want to put the handcuffs on me now. I said, but right now, I don't care. He brought the dogs out, man. He dog run around the truck. I look up, the dog went back to the police car, just sat down. You know what I'm saying? I say, so he didn't smell that, did. I say, he smelled them. That roast beef and that pastrami sandwich I had in the back. He probably wanted that. But, you know, man, you're gonna run into all kind of stuff, and it's a way to handle everything, you know, even with women, even your relationship, you got to communicate, man. Communicate. My wife will shut down sometime. I said, well, I wait till she get through having her silent moment, and then you can come talk to me. You know what I'm saying? And one day, she got mad at me. I don't know what she got mad about. And I told her, I said, whenever you want to talk, I say, you come sit by me in the bedroom in this chair. Put your big girl panties on and sit down and tell big daddy what's the problem. And we saw the problem in three seconds. You see what I'm saying? You know, I'm that type. I'm calm. I'm not a violent man. You know, My uncle told. My uncle raised me, he said, don't ever hit no woman. Don't ever leave. Walk out the door, run. He said, if you can't run out and joke, he said, but you're gonna be all right. I. I live by that. You know? I live by that. And. And I teach my kids, you know, don't hit no woman. No, no, no, no, no. Because when you get a divorce, my brother, I don't know what it is. I don't know who made this rule up, but the man always got to start from the bottom. I just don't understand that. Why do we have to start from the bottom? We done built all this up, and then they just take it away. You know, I. I don't get that. I need to talk to some judges. I. I need to tell you, y' all need to work it out. But, man, we can split this thing together, player. You know what I'm saying? But, you know, you know, it just. It's just life, you know, it's life. And that's how the law is. That's how it's set up. And, and I, I, I encourage every young man to have children, take care of kids, no matter what. You know, when I got a divorce with my first wife, man, I was hoping she had a new dude. I was praying to God, said, father, God, in the name of Jesus, please let her have a new dude. Please, God, please answer my prayer if you real answer me, you know, and she did, you know, and, but you know, some, some things you got to let go. Cause I was told you'd never make it. You'll never make it. You, you fat. People gonna laugh at you cause you're fat. And I said, well, I tell you what, I see you on TV, and here I am, right here, 36 years later, man, still doing it, still loving it. And people always say, you have 15 minutes of fame. I always tell people I hadn't even started on my 15 minutes yet. I'm still having fun doing stand up, real talk.