Miss Understood with Rachel Uchitel — Episode #358
Guest: Maddie Kowalski
Air Date: February 21, 2026

Episode Overview

In this episode, Rachel Uchitel sits down with Maddie Kowalski, a University of Florida student whose life was turned upside down after a private, nonconsensual video of her was leaked and went viral. The episode explores Maddie’s lived reality in the wake of viral humiliation, victim blaming, and the misconception surrounding her story. Rachel creates space for Maddie to clarify what actually happened, to debunk damaging narratives, and to share how she’s coping under relentless public scrutiny.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

Maddie’s Background

• Jacksonville native: Grew up by the beach, “Pretty normal childhood.” (03:03)
• College experience: Florida was a practical choice (“free tuition… an hour and 45 minutes from where I’m from” — 04:15).
• College life: Lived with roommates, joined a sorority, described the culture as mixed and “50/50” supportive and difficult (05:53).
• Personal challenges: Endured a tough breakup prior to the incident but felt like she was on stable ground with new friends at the start of sophomore year (08:42).

The Night Everything Changed

• Initial clue: First saw rumors about herself on Yik Yak, the anonymous college gossip app (09:35).
• Spread to other platforms: Realized the scope when friends alerted her to content on X (formerly Twitter), where her name started trending (12:34).
• Nature of the viral content: Explicit videos of Maddie, involving sexual acts without her consent, rapidly circulated across platforms, accompanied by hostile memes and AI edits (13:15).

“I'm watching my name start trending, and I'm just watching all the comments flood in and people re-uploading it, like, so quickly… I can't stop this. This is something I cannot just, you know, take down and it’s done. It’s everywhere.” — Maddie (14:34)

Handling the Immediate Fallout

• Isolation & Panic: Maddie describes “freaking out,” initially too afraid to call her parents, especially as trolls were contacting and harassing them (15:13).
• Family Harassment: Her father’s LinkedIn was exposed, her brother pulled from school, the family receiving prank calls (33:48).
• School impact: “I withdrew from all my classes last semester…” — Maddie (32:59).

Legal & Social Dimensions

• Consent and legality: Maddie clarifies that she was “under the influence,” and thus could not legally consent—“and I definitely did not consent to posting.” (18:07)
• Crime vs. Victim-Shaming: Rachel points out public confusion—“The only reason it got taken down…was because X ends up blocking it because it was illegal. Correct.” (16:25)
• Community response: Maddie faced stigma and isolation on campus—“People at school are like, you need to stay away from her. Like, she’s trying to get people in trouble… Anything you say, she’s going to send you to jail.” (18:54)

“People are, like, saying I should be locked up and all of these things. I'm like, well, I didn't commit a crime. These people… committed a crime.” — Maddie (18:38)

Rumors, Misconceptions, and Victim-Blaming

• False rumors: Addressed damaging stories that she “did it for drugs” or was “a prostitute”—all untrue (22:04).
• Victim-blaming: Online comments accused her of “asking for it” by going out, drinking, or being flirtatious.
• Clarification: Maddie explains there were two separate nights, different groups (“the ones from the main video, I didn’t even know them. Literally picked me up off the side of the road.” — 29:38).

“I mean, I didn’t ask to be posted... Like, this is not... every little girl’s dream is to, like, be now, like, on a podcast, talking about the fact that my body got leaked.” — Maddie (28:15)

Emotional and Social Aftermath

• Struggle with daily life: “Every single day, it’s posted somewhere else… I just can’t, you know, pay for people to be taking this down for the rest of my life.” (21:00)
• Mental health: Isolated, anxious, and struggled with suicidal thoughts — roommates alerted parents to her well-being (34:16).
• Reluctance to engage with fame: Opportunities (from influencers, streamers) arise, but Maddie, not “mentally” ready, declines (51:20).

Shame, Guilt, and Self-Reflection

• Guilt related to family: Most hurtful comments are about her family—“people tell me they would laugh if I killed myself… when they bring my family into it, that’s when it really hurts.” (55:40)
• Relationship with family: Supportive, but emotional strain and guilt persist (56:16).
• Life lessons and agency: Maddie acknowledges mistakes (“drinking underage, talking to strangers… yes, I made mistakes, but nothing warrants this.” —53:10).

Hope, Outlook, & Messages to Listeners

• Justice and future: Unsure what justice looks like, focused on daily survival — “I have no idea. Like, I genuinely, like, dude. I mean, I didn’t think I was gonna, like, survive this.” (50:51)
• Helping others: Wants her story to help others facing revenge porn — “Anyone who even has any kind of revenge porn or whatever happen… is probably gonna go to my page. That’s why I want my posts to [be supportive].” (41:46)
• What’s misunderstood?: The lack of humanity in how she’s treated online—“People don’t even think I’m a person… Everybody’s living life for the first time. Like, I’m 19… please, like I just need grace, you know?” (58:25)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On viral exposure:
  “Being the subject of so much scrutiny online for something I didn’t consent to… I have a constant state of anxiety. I just sit there and refresh Twitter over and over and over.” — Maddie (54:55)

• On public blame and shame:
  “People will say, ‘I feel sorry for Maddie, but she asked for it.’ …This is not every little girl’s dream—to be, now, on a podcast, talking about the fact that my body got leaked.” — Maddie (28:15)

• On misconceptions and rumors:
  “Everyone says I was like a prostitute… apparently I had sex for drugs, but I did not.” — Maddie (22:23)

• On the need for compassion:
  “It’s shocking to me that anyone would take the side of anything but compassion for all parties around.” — Rachel (17:18)

• On lasting impact:
  “Most people in my generation have seen the video… every person I meet is gonna… have certain assumptions about me.” — Maddie (21:00)

Important Timestamps

• [03:03] Maddie shares about her upbringing in Jacksonville, family, and high school experience
• [04:15] Decision to attend the University of Florida and college life
• [09:35] Reading rumors on Yik Yak; initial confusion about what was happening
• [12:34] Discovery of the viral video on X/Twitter and public identification
• [13:41] Description of the video content and initial reaction
• [18:07] Clarification about intoxication, consent, and legal aspects
• [21:00] Long-term effects, public visibility, and judgment
• [22:04] Debunking prostitution/drugs rumors
• [32:59] Withdrew from all university classes as fallout spreads
• [34:48] Parents intervene, seeing the extent of Maddie’s struggles
• [38:38] Experiences with public encounters and unwanted attention on campus
• [41:46] Hopes her story can help others dealing with revenge porn
• [50:51] “Day by day, I’m here…”
• [54:55] Maddie describes the psychological toll of being internet-famous against her will
• [58:25] Maddie’s plea: “Please, like I just need grace, you know?”

Final Thoughts

Rachel concludes by reinforcing support, recognizing Maddie’s resilience, and reminding listeners that no one is defined by a single moment of public shame. Maddie’s candor invites empathy and serves as a vital counter-narrative to the cruelty and misinformation still rampant online regarding viral victimization and consent.

This episode powerfully captures what it means to go viral against your will—from the personal, legal, and emotional angles. It’s an honest and raw testimonial on victim-blaming, digital harm, and the hope for compassion and better understanding.