Today’s Headlines: Melania Trump made an unannounced appearance in the White House foyer to deny any meaningful relationship with Jeffrey Epstein or Ghislaine Maxwell, call for public congressional hearings for survivors, and insist Epstein did not introduce her to Donald. Trump said he didn't know about the remarks in advance — his own communications team immediately contradicted that. Nobody knows anything, as usual. The timing is suspicious enough that theories are flying about what's about to drop. The Iran ceasefire is wobbling badly. Iran is still restricting Strait traffic to roughly four ships a day versus the pre-war average of 100, charging $2 million per ship in tolls payable in crypto or yuan, and accusing the U.S. of violating three ceasefire points. Trump posted at midnight threatening that if the agreement isn't fully complied with, "the shootin' starts bigger and better than anyone has ever seen." JD Vance flew to Pakistan to lead peace negotiations, blamed translation issues with Iranian negotiators for the "choppiness," and Israel kept striking Lebanon anyway. Republicans in Congress blocked a War Powers Act effort to stop the war — even as Tucker Carlson, Megyn Kelly, Alex Jones, and Candace Owens publicly turned on it, prompting Trump to call them "NUT JOBS." The Free Press reported that back in January, a top Pentagon official summoned the Pope's U.S. ambassador and warned that the Catholic Church had better take America's side — and referenced the Avignon Papacy, the 14th century period when French royalty used military force to extort the Vatican, as a subtle threat. An 18-year-old USC student lost his eye at a No Kings protest after a federal agent fired a pepper ball into a group of demonstrators. U.S. fertility rates hit another record low in 2025. American Airlines raised checked bag fees to $50, $60, and $200 — another Iran war fuel cost passed directly to consumers. RFK Jr. announced a podcast. Artemis II splashes down tonight off San Diego.

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