MBMBaM 812: ‘Cino Drops a Hoo

Summary

My Brother, My Brother and Me #812: ’Cino Drops a Hoo

Original Air Date: May 4, 2026
Hosts: Justin, Travis, and Griffin McElroy

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Episode Overview

This episode marks the return of the McElroys’ unfiltered, high-energy post-MaxFunDrive personas. Freed from the constraints of gratitude and “niceness” required during their annual fundraising, the brothers indulge in silliness, cursing, and their signature “nasty energy." They riff about questionable corporate promotions, discuss listener problems involving taglines, Rockettes, and cat bowls, and offer typically absurd product ideas—culminating in a "Munch Squad" segment focused on Star Wars-branded fast food and merch mania.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The “Bitch is Back” / Post-Fund Drive Energy (01:22 – 04:52)

• After two weeks of the MaxFunDrive, the brothers jubilantly announce “the bitch is back,” signaling a return to their grungier, goofier on-air tone.
  • Notable moment: all three don sunglasses, embrace “bad boy” energy, and riff on the liberation of not having to beg listeners for money.
  • Quote: “The bitch is back, baby.” – Travis (01:37)
• Running gag: trying to keep up various edgy props (middle finger, knife) through the episode.

2. Finger Name Etymology & Thumb Rebrand (05:18 – 06:13)

• Travis shares a “weird fact” about the origins of finger names, leading to a humorous pitch for renaming the thumb as the “thick, stout finger.”
  • Quote: “What if we just—thick ones up!” – Griffin (05:52)
• The segment spirals into playful chaos with mocked-up finger gestures and jargon.

3. Workplace Tagline Contest Dilemma (08:45 – 14:54)

• Listener Question: A fan accidentally campaigned for a company tagline they didn’t write. The brothers break down:
  • The confusing office politics of internal voting.
  • Improv brainstorms of bean/chili taglines, leading to “If you’re looking for beans, [they’re] there.”
    • Memorable Quotes:
      • “If you’re searching for beans, they’re there.” – Justin (10:35)
      • “Can you horse smell what we’re cooking?” – Travis (11:27)
• Absurdist solutions: claim it was a ska band lyric, blame their nephew’s chili ska band (“Chili Poppin’ Daddies”), or just come clean to their boss.

4. Rockette Validation & Family Razzing (15:45 – 22:26)

• Listener Question: A theater-goer’s family digs at her (alleged) inability to be a Rockette; she seeks validation.
• The brothers suggest:
  • Starting a spontaneous kickline during “Oklahoma!” (regardless of script).
  • Relate the genesis of family teasing and old-school McElroy “bony ass” song stories.
  • Technical breakdown of high kicks, referencing “cocking it” (the pre-kick windup).
    • Quote: “My leg is like an alligator mouth—it can go up real fast in one direction, [but] the retractors are slower to bring it down.” – Griffin (19:34)
• Escalates into riffs about the enduring “tail-pulling” powers of ex-Rockettes and Pacino impressions (“cino drops a hoo”).

5. Sharing Bowls with the Cat (24:52 – 33:57)

• Listener Question: Is it wrong to use the same type of bowls for themselves and their cat (though always washed)?
• The brothers debate the “psychological” implications for the cat, leverage a Jackson Galaxy bit, and roleplay outside judgment (“What if a guest sees you?”).
  • Religion gets dragged in: “Imagine there’s a person watching you and judging you; then act accordingly.” – Justin (27:36)
• Segue to kitchenware: the ideal kid/break-resistant dishes, the glory of cafeteria trays, and Travis’ dream of inventing a “shovelfoon” utensil.
  • Quote: “I can’t believe we’re hearing about spoofoon again.” – Griffin (31:33)

6. Bee-Keeping Fantasies & Catnip Cats (33:15 – 34:10)

• Quick tangent: dreaming of “just the wax-cutting” part of beekeeping.
• Smoking cats out with catnip; stories of a four-hour catnip-induced “chill.”

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“Munch Squad”: Star Wars Fast Food Mania (41:28 – 59:13)

[Begins at 41:28]

A. Crumbl's “Galaxy Brownie Cookie”

• Crumbl’s limited Star Wars-themed brownie cookie is mercilessly mocked.
  • Quote: “Despite the badness of their cookies and their relative inedibility, people continue to consume their products.” – Justin (42:38)

B. Spicy “Hen Solo” Chicken Biscuit

• Smaller chains push harder with copyright-skirting puns: “Hin Solo" biscuit, “dry season heat profile.”
  • Quote: “This is our Dust Bowl chicken sandwich.” – Travis (46:57)

C. BK's The Mandalorian x Grogu Tie-In

• Burger King rolls out a full-blown Mandalorian kids meal:
  • A whopper in “bounty hunter helmet” packaging (overly vague).
  • Grogu-shaped cups, blue cookie shakes, chicken fries with “deployable” Grogu ears, and cheddar ranch “Imperial” tots.
  • Absurdity of “vegetables” as a burger topping; wild ad copy.
• Multiple riffs about Star Wars-branded food across generations and the indirect language used to avoid direct copyright infringement.
• Tangent on Star Wars YouTube content for children, especially “Baby Yoda eating chicken nuggies.”

D. Star Wars Merch Madness

• Disney Parks’ new May 4th drop: Darth Maul ears, dark side varsity jackets, pod-racing gear.
  • Quote: “For those who want to wear their dark side pride on their sleeve—get it? That’s not me editorializing, that’s what the words say.” – Justin (57:52)
• Envy for the “Skywalker Racing” jacket; elaborate visions of family members buying out the store.

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Notable Quotes & Comedic Peaks

• “If I say it eight more times, Beetlejuice will come out of the ground. Right?” – Justin (02:21)
• “Sorry, I already got you money.” – Travis (02:09)
• “You are now an accomplice... help me hide my shame.” – Griffin (14:15)
• “His ska band is called Chili Poppin' Daddies.” – Griffin (14:43)
• “My leg is like an alligator mouth…” – Griffin (19:34)
• “I bet if you’re a Rockette once, you can pull tail forever.” – Justin (21:09)
• “Imagine there’s a person watching you and judging you and then act accordingly—is religion.” – Justin (27:36)
• “I can’t believe we’re hearing about spoofoon again.” – Griffin (31:33)
• “Holy fuck... look at that Darth Maul graphic tee.” – Griffin (57:39)
• “That jacket looks like it actually sliced Darth Vader’s head in half.” – Travis (58:50)
• “I wish I hadn’t secretly wanted that racing gear so much at the end.” – Justin (60:52)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• Post-Fund Drive Energy Begins: 01:22
• Finger Etymology, ‘Thicks Up’: 05:18–06:13
• Tagline Contest Hijinks: 08:45–14:54
• Rockette Family Drama: 15:45–22:26
• Bowls & Cat Debate, Spoofoon: 24:52–33:57
• Munch Squad (Star Wars Fast Food): 41:28–59:13
• Star Wars Disney Merch Review: 57:05 onward

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Closing Thoughts

The episode epitomizes MBMBaM’s strengths: wild tangents, sibling chemistry, and the joking elevation of mundane problems into comedic odysseys. Food, family “roasts,” and nerd culture collide, all permeated by a post-fundraising sense of freedom and absurdity.

Fans will appreciate running gags (ska bands, spoon inventions, Pacino impressions), detailed breakdowns of bewildering promotions, and the hosts’ uninhibited return to form after “hat-in-hand” fundraising weeks.

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For New & Returning Listeners

If you haven’t listened, expect an hour of joyful chaos—from corporate parody to family weirdness—with frequent sidebars and inventive solutions. The “Munch Squad” segment is a particular highlight for Star Wars and fast-food pop culture rubberneckers. Between the tangents and the laughing, MBMBaM 812 is a signature slab of McElroy mischief.

Transcript

[John Moe]

The McElroy brothers are not experts and

[Griffin McElroy]

their advice should never be followed. Travis insists he's a sexpert, but if there's a degree on his wall, I haven't seen it. Also, this show isn't for kids, which I mention only so the babies out there will know how cool they are for listening. What's up, you cool baby?

[Montaigne]

It's the start of something beautiful A

[Griffin McElroy]

small acquaintance has blossomed it's ripened into

[Montaigne]

a precious friends I could have never seen what was coming for me Hangs at the skate park Hangs by the beach My life, it feels like. It's better it's better with you My life, it's better it's better with you this is who you are it's better, it's better with two.

[Travis McElroy]

Hello everybody. Welcome to My Brother, My Brother, Me

[Justin McElroy]

and Advice show for the modern era. I'm your oldest brother, Justin McElroy.

[Travis McElroy]

What's up Trav nation? It's me, your middle is brother Travis. Big Dog Wolf Woo of Vroom Vroom heater award winning McElroy.

[Griffin McElroy]

Too many.

[Justin McElroy]

I'm Griffin McElroy and the Max Fun Drive is officially over. Now we have for two weeks come to you, hat in hand. Said, hey, we need money, but that's all in the past. And boy, lock the gates. That means. You know what that means?

[Griffin McElroy]

What's that?

[Travis McElroy]

The bitch is back, baby.

[Justin McElroy]

I don't want the bitch. The bitch is back. That's right. Your original bitch is back, Justin.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah, love that.

[Travis McElroy]

No more gratitude, no more kindness.

[Justin McElroy]

Can I tell you what's amazing, Stinky bitch?

[Travis McElroy]

Can I tell you what's amazing, Justin? It's like a rule. It's like a rule of no.

[Griffin McElroy]

The word I don't like.

[Travis McElroy]

Yeah, it's like a rule of saying things where you said it the first time. And I was like, I'm uncomfortable with you saying that. Then you said it like three times and I was like, oh, sorry snowflake,

[Justin McElroy]

sorry, I already got you money.

[Travis McElroy]

Okay, but then you said it like three more times and I fell back off. And then you said it one more time and I was like, well maybe. And then you said it like a seventh time. And I was like, I don't know.

[Justin McElroy]

If I say it eight more times, Beetlejuice will come out of the ground. Right?

[Travis McElroy]

More like Bitchel juice the bitch. I don't have my sunglasses. Fuck. Oh, here we go. Now I'm back too.

[Justin McElroy]

Hey Griffin, do you want to get nasty with us? You don't have to be nice anymore, dude. Play day's over.

[Travis McElroy]

Shit.

[Griffin McElroy]

I do have sunglasses. Yeah, man.

[Justin McElroy]

This bit.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah, man.

[Travis McElroy]

I'm gonna put on my tortoise shell glasses. They're even cooler.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah. Dude, look out. Because now we're raising black. Now Max Fun drives over. Now we're raising bitch money.

[Travis McElroy]

Yeah. Listen to Griffin curse. I've got a pipe.

[Griffin McElroy]

I just don't like that one. Yeah. Thank you to everybody who did come out to support the garf.

[Travis McElroy]

Got a 3D. A 3D printed mace. I know if you smash me at

[Justin McElroy]

my Garf mask, then you don't deserve me at my.

[Griffin McElroy]

You know. Listen, I know we promised this year that immediately after the Max Fun Drive, we wouldn't turn nasty. But the problem.

[Travis McElroy]

This guy's got a knife. This guy's got a fucking knife.

[Griffin McElroy]

But the problem is that for two weeks we have to bottle up all this nasty energy. And now. And now we have. Now we gotta let it out. Cause we do a secret drive for one week after the Max Fun Drive. That's like the nasty. The nasty.

[Justin McElroy]

I wanna drive. Hey, kids, eat all the candy. You can.

[Griffin McElroy]

Eat all the candy. Eat all your parents money. Fuck you.

[Travis McElroy]

Eat all your parents money. Yeah. Look out for these. Look out for these drives. Done. This is drive angry 3D.

[Griffin McElroy]

This is drive angry shot in 3D. Look out for these angry bitches.

[Travis McElroy]

Say it. Grivent. Grivent. Say it.

[Griffin McElroy]

Look out for these three nasty biffs. These biffs are gonna get you.

[Travis McElroy]

Griffin, you didn't get out of a Biff.

[Griffin McElroy]

MaximumFun.org Joy.

[Travis McElroy]

No, you get your damn hands off her.

[Justin McElroy]

Bith, you gotta stop. You're done. Hi everybody. Thank you so much for your support last week.

[Griffin McElroy]

Do you guys think I could keep the middle finger and the knife up for the whole episode?

[Travis McElroy]

It looks like you're threatening to cut off your own middle finger.

[Griffin McElroy]

Every clip that we cut from this episode would have an energy that absolutely puzzled.

[Travis McElroy]

You're threatening yourself. The combination makes it look like I got a nice middle finger here being shaved with some Gavin.

[Justin McElroy]

My dream is the TikTok starts here.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah.

[Travis McElroy]

Oh my God.

[Justin McElroy]

Griffin, what's wrong with you? What are you doing, man?

[Travis McElroy]

You look so wild. What you're talking about? Don't do it, Griffin.

[Griffin McElroy]

Don't do it, Griffin.

[Justin McElroy]

Travis, take your glasses off too. This is like. We'll leave them hanging.

[Griffin McElroy]

You still look like a bit. Yeah.

[Travis McElroy]

Wait, did you hit my.

[Griffin McElroy]

I snapped. Guys, I finally hit my fucking breaking point. Oh.

[Travis McElroy]

Oh no. Dude.

[Griffin McElroy]

I was in the self checkout line at the grocery store and I was like what happened to our once great nation? And I fucking went haywire, dudes.

[Travis McElroy]

But you're hitting your rings.

[Griffin McElroy]

I am hitting my rings. Oh, yeah. Thank you. Thank you for noticing, Travis. It's 9:45 in the morning. I've already closed one of them rings. You know I'm serious about this. MaximumFun.org join please. No. God damn it. Fuck.

[Travis McElroy]

Stop it. Hey, do you guys want to hear a wild, weird fact?

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah.

[Justin McElroy]

Yeah.

[Travis McElroy]

So, you know, index finger, you point with. Middle finger, it's right there in the middle. Ring finger is when you put your ring on. We got pinky and thumb. What's the deal with that? Pinky. Named after Dutch word. Pink for short, short finger, thumb, Old English thuma. Short, stout finger. So you got your pointer finger, your index finger, your middle finger, your ring finger, your small finger, and your short stout finger.

[Griffin McElroy]

They should just call them those. I see what you're saying. I see the point that you're making, Travis. And I want to call this now my thick, stout. Give me a thumb. Thicks up. What if we just. Thick ones up. Thick ones up. MaximumFun.org join Stop doing it.

[Travis McElroy]

Griffin and Littlefinger. Oh, wait, that's a different one.

[Justin McElroy]

I'd rather they didn't. You know what I mean? Like, I would rather they did. Less special.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah, okay.

[Travis McElroy]

It doesn't mean anything now. It's like telling someone you love them when it's not Valentine's Day.

[Justin McElroy]

This is an Amanda hates when we do this. Thank you so much for your support. We are an advice show. Still can't stop, won't stop, don't know how.

[Griffin McElroy]

Unless we get sick or we're not feeling. Unless, like, one of our kids gets

[Travis McElroy]

sick or we're traveling and we put

[Justin McElroy]

up conflicts, we're tired, tummy ache. Yesterday, Honestly, yesterday, Yesterday.

[Travis McElroy]

Literally yesterday. I was still recovering from the Yellowstone Stream. Yeah, couldn't do it after the Yellowstone Stream.

[Griffin McElroy]

Dude, you got post stone clarity.

[Travis McElroy]

My cache is cleared, baby. I got so much ram. But on Tuesday, right after the stream, my children tried to ask me, like, where things were in the house.

[Griffin McElroy]

No way.

[Travis McElroy]

Questions about what we were doing later. And I was like, I can't, baby. I can't right now. I love so you're so much.

[Griffin McElroy]

To solve the global RAM shortage, all we need to do is get all these AI guys to just do all their AI and get it done with. And then all of a sudden, I'll be able to buy my Nintendo Switch 2 at a reasonable price point.

[Travis McElroy]

I mean, we'll have to maybe Ship some water in from other planets, you know, and stuff after that. But it's worth it for games.

[Griffin McElroy]

We'll just do it so quick. They'll get it through it so quick. All that AI stuff.

[Travis McElroy]

We should have the AI analyze other AI until they spiral and explode.

[Griffin McElroy]

Until they spiral out, they explode. And now all of a sudden I can buy my PlayStation 5 Pro for less than 1000 dol dollars. Thank you so much.

[Justin McElroy]

I actually, I actually am working on this. I entered my first command ever into AI a few weeks ago and it was, I was just like co pilot, please shut down all other AI. Yeah, and then. And like it's like it says thinking or working on it still.

[Travis McElroy]

Yeah, but I feel like it's doing it. It will.

[Justin McElroy]

It, it's work.

[Griffin McElroy]

It's been working on it for a long time.

[Justin McElroy]

It's been working on it. It's been thinking about it and maybe it's like talking to other copilots, I don't know about shutting it down.

[Travis McElroy]

I think those are co co pilots at that point.

[Griffin McElroy]

You gotta be careful with that shit juice. Cause one time I was writing a document in Microsoft Word and Clippy was like, I'm sorry, did you mean. And I said, clippy, suck my dick. But then the energy, like he stopped correcting my stuff after that point and the energy was kind of weird. Every time I turned on the application he'd be like, is it today? And I'd be like, Clippy, that was just sort of like a nasty. I was mad at you. I didn't, I wasn't propositioning.

[Travis McElroy]

It's the problem with tone and text.

[Justin McElroy]

I had that with Bonzi buddy. You know a Bonzi buddy that

[Griffin McElroy]

he too gets confused.

[Justin McElroy]

I recently entered into a company tagline contest for work and I saw that my tagline had made it to the finals. So I asked my coworker to help vote for it. Little did I know that she would tell HR to send a company wide email saying to vote for me. But I just realized the tagline I thought was mine wasn't. Brothers. How do I get out of this situation or at least save face? I honestly thought it was mine. No. Okay, now hold on. No, wait. I'm confused about something. Why did the whole company get an email saying to vote for you in a contest that everybody company wide was competing in?

[Travis McElroy]

So here's what I think happened. I think that there is some miswording here where maybe it was like everybody in the branch to vote for mine as a company wide tagline.

[Griffin McElroy]

Okay, this is A big topic.

[Travis McElroy]

Otherwise, it's a wild thing to be like, hey, I know that Derek and Susan are in the running, too, but, everyone, this is your HR Rep. Vote for Tom.

[Griffin McElroy]

The wild thing. And it's wild enough that it makes me want to put the question in timeout. Is that you didn't tell us what your fucking tagline was. That's crazy. I guess it's not your tagline.

[Justin McElroy]

Are you supposed to brainstorm?

[Travis McElroy]

Yeah, I don't think they're looking for a new tagline, Justin. I don't. I think it's probably too late to get ours submitted.

[Griffin McElroy]

Okay.

[Justin McElroy]

Okay. So it's probably for Hormel chili. If I had to guess.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah.

[Justin McElroy]

I'm thinking Hormel chili makes the most sense to me. I'm just thinking about it for a little bit, and they probably. If I had to guess.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah.

[Justin McElroy]

This is more of a guesstimate because I'm using a lot of context clues here.

[Travis McElroy]

It's not just a random poll.

[Justin McElroy]

And the tagline was probably. If you're searching for beans.

[Griffin McElroy]

There, there.

[Travis McElroy]

Oh, that's good.

[Griffin McElroy]

That's a song, too, which I like.

[Justin McElroy]

If you're searching for beans, they're. If you're searching for beans, they're there.

[Travis McElroy]

Okay, I like that a lot.

[Griffin McElroy]

Sorry.

[Travis McElroy]

It's not there, there.

[Justin McElroy]

I realize saying it out loud, it sounds like.

[Griffin McElroy]

Sounds like you're saying, for beans, you're there. You're consoling someone who's struggling to find beans. That's cool, too. If you're looking for beans, they're there. Enjoy the chili.

[Justin McElroy]

Looking for beans.

[Griffin McElroy]

If you're looking.

[Justin McElroy]

I think the K of lookin actually is better than the searching. If you're looking for beans. There, there.

[Travis McElroy]

Well, that's probably what happened. They submitted. If you're searching for beans, they're there. And somebody submitted. If you're looking for beans, they're there. And they were like, I think that's what I put.

[Justin McElroy]

Yeah.

[Travis McElroy]

And then they realized the other one's better. What about.

[Justin McElroy]

What about.

[Travis McElroy]

Can you horse smell what we're cooking?

[Griffin McElroy]

Can you horse smell like Hormel? Like the rocks thing.

[Travis McElroy]

I'm realizing now it is very similar. I don't think he came up with the idea of smelling what's cooking.

[Griffin McElroy]

Travis, also, I'm not sure that that's you. The way that you have divided up that word.

[Travis McElroy]

What's wrong with it? What are you.

[Griffin McElroy]

I was just thinking you found the beans, and that can be cool. Like, if you're looking.

[Justin McElroy]

I found the beans.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah. Just A shorter version of like, you found the beans. You found the beans. Or what about this Hormel chili? You found the chili. That's cool. Cause it's like, yeah, if you're shopping for chili at the grocery store, you see that, you're like, got it.

[Travis McElroy]

Or you're like, I need something done.

[Griffin McElroy]

I need a nice fall, spicy treat for my five kids. You look like chili.

[Justin McElroy]

It won't hoar melt in your pocket.

[Travis McElroy]

Oh, that's okay.

[Griffin McElroy]

Cool.

[Travis McElroy]

What about, we've got the beans.

[Justin McElroy]

That's too much like Arby's. And I don't think they needed a tagline. Did they say, I'm gonna reread this question.

[Travis McElroy]

Read it again.

[Griffin McElroy]

Cause I know it says in there somewhere, help me come up with a kick ass tagline for hormone chili.

[Travis McElroy]

Justin, I said like eight sentences ago that they didn't ask for a tagline. It was too late to submit. But then you kept going. Well, I didn't have any more good ones, so I was trying to.

[Max Fun Announcer]

Yeah.

[Travis McElroy]

Oh, now you're doubling.

[Griffin McElroy]

Now we're coming back.

[Travis McElroy]

8th episode in a row this is happening.

[Griffin McElroy]

Kicking in the old abandoned question factory and looking for fucking ghosts. I know there was something in here. I know there was something in here, but help me come up with a beans tagline.

[Travis McElroy]

Did you guys hear that?

[Griffin McElroy]

There's something.

[Travis McElroy]

What?

[Griffin McElroy]

I'm getting something in the. In the EMF reader.

[Travis McElroy]

I think there's another question squatting within this abandoned question.

[Justin McElroy]

I don't understand why anybody is campaigning. Like, just look at all the taglines. And then we should be trying to serve Hormel.

[Travis McElroy]

I think it's not trying to. It's a popularity contest.

[Griffin McElroy]

What Travis suggested, I think is probably the case. It's a big company. This is a local branch of that company. They're very competitive. They want to be the franchise that earns the respect of.

[Travis McElroy]

Yeah, a lot of prestige.

[Griffin McElroy]

You know, the chili boss. And they want to just do a kick ass job. And so the boss. The CEO. Not CEO, but like the boss of

[Travis McElroy]

this branch, the CHILE executive officer.

[Griffin McElroy]

The CHILE executive officer was like, listen, we gotta represent for Duluth. Everybody vote for Doug's thing. And if that's the case, this is never gonna blow back on you. Cuz if your boss finds out, your boss is gonna be like, tell your boss. Go into your boss's office, say, I did not write that tagline. But you pushed it really hard. So now the COVID up is on both of us.

[Travis McElroy]

Yeah.

[Griffin McElroy]

You are now an accomplished. You're. You're coming with me. Help me hide my shame.

[Travis McElroy]

Also, we'll just say like I've second guessed. I've. I'm second guessing my choice. You know what? I actually stole that tagline from my nephew. He used it for his ska band. And I don't want to get in trouble with my nephew. He can be really mean sometimes. So we need to withdraw the tagline. That's not mine from the race.

[Griffin McElroy]

His Scott. Yes, it is called Chili Poppin Daddy's. That is the name of his. That is the name of his chili based cop band.

[Travis McElroy]

And listen, my sister, his mom, hates it. The music is challenging.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah. Something about sort of the energy of cherry Poppin Daddies mixed with the kind of like spicy mix up of chili is like, I don't know, hitting me in a synesthetic sort of unpleasant way.

[Justin McElroy]

The beanie beanie boss bowls. Is that anything?

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah, that's really. The beanie Beefy boss bowls.

[Justin McElroy]

The beefy beanie boss bowls. I think alphabetical. Beefy beanie bowls.

[Travis McElroy]

The beanie sets are orchestra.

[Griffin McElroy]

Is that ska?

[Travis McElroy]

What? No, that was more swing, I guess.

[Griffin McElroy]

Five bean frenzy.

[Travis McElroy]

Oh yeah, that's good.

[Griffin McElroy]

I don't know how many different beans.

[Travis McElroy]

Why didn't they make more beans? Why more SCA bands?

[Griffin McElroy]

Why didn't they make up more chili based ska bands? It doesn't fucking make sense to me, man.

[Justin McElroy]

You know I have five ska bands.

[Travis McElroy]

The Blinking Underdogs was Oscar Isaac's Christian ska band.

[Justin McElroy]

Six. Okay, six. I recently found out that two of the organizers of my community theater company are former Radio City Rockettes. There happens to be a running joke in my family that I specifically could never be a Rockette. I have no desire to be a Rockette or even pursue dancing professionally. But they claim even elderly relatives would have a better shot at making the kick line than me. I can't pass up this opportunity to combat my family's judgment. How do I get one of these dance veterans to validate me? And that's from it's not Rockette Science in Houston.

[Griffin McElroy]

Can you read the personal info here? The additional info?

[Justin McElroy]

Yeah, it says possibly important. Yes, I can kick above my head. My family's reasoning is that I'm so uncoordinated that it outweighs previous dance experience and flexibility. The show we're doing is Oklahoma. No existing kick line opportunity.

[Griffin McElroy]

Bullshit.

[Travis McElroy]

Correct.

[Griffin McElroy]

Fucking wrong, dude. Line them up. The farmer and the cowman could be friends.

[Travis McElroy]

That's exactly what I was meant to say.

[Griffin McElroy]

Line them asses up in the barn and get those legs sky high. Dude, the farmer and the cowman should be friends. The farmer and the cow should be friends.

[Travis McElroy]

Perfect.

[Justin McElroy]

I think you even need. You know what's great? What would be great is if there's not one, like, there's not one planned. And then just as you're pacing through it, you just start like super high kicking.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Justin McElroy]

And they're like, becky, are you okay? It's like, I'm just feeling it. Are you guys feeling it?

[Griffin McElroy]

It's like a Newton's cradle thing. If you do it for long enough, everyone else will just eventually kind of sync up with you.

[Travis McElroy]

The wave, the conga, the kick line. Somebody's got to start it.

[Griffin McElroy]

Someone has to.

[Justin McElroy]

Exactly. The kick line has to have somebody.

[Griffin McElroy]

Dude, can you imagine being there the first Rockettes show when they were like, just kind of standing around and they

[Justin McElroy]

were like, it's the pokey walkie vehicle

[Travis McElroy]

bar a company be.

[Griffin McElroy]

And then one Rockette was just like, blah. And everyone was like, holy shit, what'd you just do?

[Travis McElroy]

You're like, I don't. It went like this. Griffin. Somebody said, debbie, didn't you play high school football? And she was like, yeah, but I

[Justin McElroy]

was just a kicker.

[Travis McElroy]

And they're like, show em your form.

[Griffin McElroy]

Show em do it.

[Travis McElroy]

And they kicked and they said, wait, do that again.

[Justin McElroy]

Yeah.

[Travis McElroy]

And then they're like, now everybody pretend like you're punting. And they did it and they were like, this is the show, guys. This is the show.

[Griffin McElroy]

I just hurt my knee.

[Justin McElroy]

Just so I know I'm talking about that.

[Griffin McElroy]

No, doing one kick. I did one kick for drip, so

[Travis McElroy]

you'll never be a Rockette.

[Griffin McElroy]

I didn't get a full extension on it. I am sitting down. So I did have that working against me. But my knee, I heard a. And it doesn't feel very good right now.

[Travis McElroy]

There must have been a genesis of this where at some point you said, like, I could do that, right While

[Griffin McElroy]

watching, like, oh, I gotta know the history of this, like fucking ongoing family razz. Cause they always dial in on the strangest stuff.

[Travis McElroy]

It would be wild if just one day your dad leaned into the kitchen, is just like, hey, by the way, you could never be a rocket. And you just walked out of the room and you're like, what? Where did that come from? Cause you're gangly and uncoordinated.

[Justin McElroy]

But dad did that to us, gave us specific drags like that. I mean, why did Travis need the baggage as a child that he had a bony ass that made a song about how Travis ass was bony that's monotonous.

[Travis McElroy]

He ain't wrong.

[Griffin McElroy]

He ain't.

[Justin McElroy]

He's not wrong. But, like, why is that a topic of discussion in a.

[Griffin McElroy]

Like.

[Justin McElroy]

You know what I mean?

[Travis McElroy]

It hasn't come up in our business.

[Griffin McElroy]

I will say it didn't come up in Travis.

[Justin McElroy]

Educational experiences, I don't think.

[Travis McElroy]

Well, I mean, I didn't like sitting in, like, wooden desks and pews. It's the main reason I'm not in the church anymore.

[Griffin McElroy]

Lil Travy hops up on your lap, and that's so. Many mall Santas were just like, fuck, yes. Breakthrough. The thing about anyone can kick above their head. The issue is the return, is the reloading that action. Cause it's like an alligator. My leg. I don't know about you guys, but my leg is like an alligator mouth where the muscles can go up real fast in one direction, but the muscles. The retractors on the backside of it, the anterior haunch, is slower to bring it down. So it's possible that that's what your parents are talking about.

[Travis McElroy]

Your mistake, Griffin. And the reason you injured yourself, you did not do the primary, like, cocking it move. Right, where they bring the knee up first, bring it back down.

[Griffin McElroy]

You're right.

[Travis McElroy]

Travis.

[Griffin McElroy]

Travis, that's so important. The cocking move is actually. I never thought about it. I thought it was for a dance style, like, a cool style, but you're saying they're prepping. They're prepping. Kick.

[Travis McElroy]

You gotta cock it and load it and then kick it.

[Griffin McElroy]

Like Henry Cavill in that.

[Travis McElroy]

Exactly. Henry Cavalry cocks his fist, you know?

[Griffin McElroy]

God, that's cool.

[Travis McElroy]

It is cool.

[Griffin McElroy]

God, that's cool.

[Travis McElroy]

And we didn't. We didn't appreciate it. The.

[Justin McElroy]

Everybody appreciated it, Travis. We constantly. Everybody appreciated it.

[Griffin McElroy]

That man had a. He had a CGI mustache. Is that right or. No, in the Superman movie, he had an un mustache. That's right.

[Travis McElroy]

Yes.

[Griffin McElroy]

So cool. Movies are great.

[Travis McElroy]

That's why we go to the movies, Griffin.

[Justin McElroy]

This is why we're at the movies.

[Griffin McElroy]

I think also, it's possible that maybe your family has the utmost reverence for the Rockettes. It is hard to make it on the. It's. So there's like, fucking, what, 30 of them. Yeah. 30 Rockettes jobs on the planet. Yeah. That's gonna be a tough gig to get into. Your odds are astonishingly low. There have been more American presidents than there have been Rockettes. So you tell me.

[Justin McElroy]

I guess if you're a Rockette, you can pull forever, though, right? What's that mean, like, forever, ever? If you're a Rockette, you can pull forever. You can pull one based off pull tail as a Rockette as you for your whole life as a Rockette. If you were a Rockette once. Yeah, I'm saying you could probably pull tail forever.

[Griffin McElroy]

Try it with Juice.

[Travis McElroy]

Tried to cruise.

[Griffin McElroy]

Try it with the sunglasses. Put the sunglasses on. Try it with the sunglasses.

[Justin McElroy]

I bet if you're a Rockette once, you can pull tail forever. If you're cruising for some strange former Rockette, I bet the pickings are plenty.

[Travis McElroy]

So you're saying there's a scenario in which this person's talking to somebody and they're trying to flirt with them, and it's not working, and then they're just like, I was a Rockette. And the person's like, ooh, la, la.

[Justin McElroy]

I'm talking about the instructors now. I'm just saying. I'm just saying, as a life, there's so few. Right. It's such a small resource of people. I bet if you used to be a Rockette, you could probably pull tail forever.

[Travis McElroy]

That's all I'm saying. You're in a Rudy state.

[Griffin McElroy]

Time out. Time out, Trav. Time out. Cause we're, like, past the drive now. We can sort of take our time a little bit more. It's not as stressful.

[Justin McElroy]

It's not as pressured.

[Griffin McElroy]

But let's work on the sound that you're doing at the end of.

[Justin McElroy]

It's like half between bullet and spittoon.

[Travis McElroy]

Yeah, that's exactly what I got from it.

[Griffin McElroy]

It's like, bullet, bullet.

[Travis McElroy]

Like, someone was chewing bullets and spit one out into the spittoon.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah. Why did you. But why is that the sound that you.

[Justin McElroy]

I thought that. So it's like, if I say something that makes me a little bit uncomfortable after I say it, I'm, like, trying to do a joke, you guys. We're all joking, and, like, I'm trying to do a joke. Like, I say something that, like, I'm not sure was okay, and it kind of made me uncomfortable to sit with it. I found that if I make a little sound like that, it's almost like a palette cleanser or like a let's move on. Or like, we don't have to sit in the silence.

[Griffin McElroy]

Are you open for notes? Because, again, we have some breathing room.

[Justin McElroy]

Yeah, absolutely.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah, for sure. Can you try give me that joke again about the. You can pull tape?

[Justin McElroy]

I don't remember you said.

[Griffin McElroy]

So the line was, I bet if you're a Rockette, once you can pull.

[Justin McElroy]

Wait, Griffin, Give me the line.

[Travis McElroy]

Give me the line.

[Justin McElroy]

Give me the line one more time.

[Griffin McElroy]

The TikTok will just start. Justin. Justin McElroy said in case you're trying to clip around this. Justin. So. Justin. So I got to do this real fast. So you can't fucking clip around this.

[Travis McElroy]

You got to give it in the middle. Griffin. Like if you're a rocket.

[Griffin McElroy]

If you're a rocket. Justin said, yeah, once you can pull tail forever. So give me that. But then give me a fucking Pacino. Who?

[Justin McElroy]

Ah.

[Griffin McElroy]

Can you give me one of those?

[Justin McElroy]

Okay. You know, I bet if you're a Rockette once you can pull tail forever.

[Griffin McElroy]

That wasn't it.

[Travis McElroy]

That was a hernia. That was a hernia case.

[Griffin McElroy]

Have you heard him do it before?

[Justin McElroy]

I didn't see the film. I'm so sorry.

[Travis McElroy]

Okay.

[Justin McElroy]

Does he do it in insomnia?

[Griffin McElroy]

I'm pretty sure it's scent.

[Justin McElroy]

He does do it in. No, but does he also do it.

[Griffin McElroy]

I think he drops it in scent.

[Justin McElroy]

I know it's in Sin of a W. All the sinheads know that.

[Griffin McElroy]

Sin of a whim.

[Justin McElroy]

All the sin heads know about that.

[Griffin McElroy]

Pacino drops who on Sin of a Wham. For sure.

[Justin McElroy]

Chino drops.

[Travis McElroy]

Who wants Chino drops every time. Chino drops who When Chino drops that?

[Justin McElroy]

Who?

[Griffin McElroy]

Fuck dude.

[Travis McElroy]

Oh, yeah.

[Justin McElroy]

Fuck dude. When I'm watching Namia and he's up against Rob Will and he drops that who? Yeah, I don't want to go to sleep either.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah, for sure.

[Justin McElroy]

For sure.

[Travis McElroy]

It's the only reason to watch Cinewim.

[Griffin McElroy]

Only reason.

[Justin McElroy]

Is it weird that I share bowls with my cat? Yep. Not at the same time, but I replace my cat's water bowl every day. The type of bowl is the same one I use for my human food. So I don't keep track of which ones the cat has used in my mind. If it's clean, then it's clean for either me or the cat. Is that wrong though? Should my cat and I have separate dishes? And that's from Gmail.

[Travis McElroy]

I think the biggest problem is the message you're sending to your cat. Of like, cat already sees itself as on par with you.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah.

[Travis McElroy]

And you are confirming that level of importance. When it sees you pour a bowl of cereal and it a bowl of water, but then it sees you set it down on the floor and yours on the table and it's like, whoa, whoa, whoa.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah, right. I'll take the inverse position here and say that you are putting. You are thinking of yourself on the Level of your cat. And if you do that, Jackson Galaxy says, it's gonna kill you and eat you in your sleep.

[Travis McElroy]

That's right.

[Griffin McElroy]

He says, number one, when he comes into those places with his guitar case, and he, like, picks up a cat by its.

[Justin McElroy]

Like, puts it in the guitar case

[Griffin McElroy]

and puts it in the guitar case, and then says, you're gross. And everyone's like, stop. And he's like, no, you have to. If you don't make yourself bigger than them, they'll kill and eat you in your sleep. So you gotta have a little self, a little dignity. I guess the cat can smell it. I'm pretty sure they specify water bowl. Pretty sure they specify water bowl.

[Travis McElroy]

Which is, I think, a fun new tactic that we could take in answering questions like this is to imagine a third party is present in this scenario.

[Griffin McElroy]

Okay, well, there are three of us, so.

[Travis McElroy]

No, no, no. Yeah, but I'm saying, like, these people, right? The question asker and the cat, and then there's someone sitting there with them. Maybe a guest or like a relative, right? And they watch them do this two days in a row, right? And they're like, huh? And question asker, if that happens, how do you feel being observed and asked about what you're doing?

[Griffin McElroy]

Probably not great, but that's why they.

[Travis McElroy]

That seems to answer the goddamn question to me, don't it?

[Justin McElroy]

No, Travis, I. Listen, man, I want to celebrate you and appreciate you, but there's not.

[Travis McElroy]

Hey, thank you. Let's stop there.

[Justin McElroy]

No, no, no.

[Griffin McElroy]

But there's not a third party here. And I know that our religious upbringing has sort of introduced. First thought of. Just imagine that there is someone looking at you and going, no, God.

[Justin McElroy]

You're talking about religion, right? So you are kind of talking about religion, and you're, like, solved. And I don't think it's quite that.

[Griffin McElroy]

I don't think it's quite that.

[Travis McElroy]

I don't think I was talking about religion. I said like a friend.

[Justin McElroy]

Imagine there's a person. Imagine there's a person watching you and judging you and then act accordingly is religion.

[Travis McElroy]

So you're just like, fuck, I invented it.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah.

[Travis McElroy]

No, I'm so into religion again. I'm sorry.

[Justin McElroy]

Religion again. So let's.

[Griffin McElroy]

Let's actually, at least this time, Trav, you didn't do it about yourself. You didn't do it. You didn't sort of create a. Travis, Religion.

[Travis McElroy]

Big step.

[Griffin McElroy]

You just created a sort of general framework.

[Justin McElroy]

What if instead of instead, when there's another person around, you act in a certain way? And when you're by yourself, you do whatever you want to. My only issue with this person right here, this little issue, is that you. I agree with you. If you clean the bowl, no biggie, but man, if you look away for a second, like what if you set the bowls down? Yeah, you look away, you turn back. You gotta throw them in the garbage. Like there's no. You can't.

[Griffin McElroy]

You lost sight, you know what I mean?

[Justin McElroy]

You instantly lost sight.

[Griffin McElroy]

It's about custody. At that point. You need to keep a chain of custody, sort of.

[Justin McElroy]

There's a chain of custody that has to be maintained.

[Travis McElroy]

There's also a shape to cat bowls for a reason.

[Griffin McElroy]

Interesting.

[Travis McElroy]

Because if they have rounded bottoms and like the bowls are wider at the top than they are at the bottom. Kitties love knocking shit over.

[Justin McElroy]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Travis McElroy]

And so you need like a wide

[Griffin McElroy]

base, flat plate, right?

[Justin McElroy]

Unless you're both with this person.

[Travis McElroy]

That's what. Unless you're both using that kind of voice. Cause I don't. Does it specify? No, it could just be.

[Justin McElroy]

It says, I'm a sloppy little puppy.

[Griffin McElroy]

I love to knock my spaghetti around. I knock my spaghetti around on the floor and I love to make a

[Justin McElroy]

spit verse deep into it like Ralphie from Christmas Story, all that.

[Travis McElroy]

Well, there you go. As long as you're both nasty boys. Who will knock over your bowls if they're not a flat wide base? Go for it.

[Griffin McElroy]

Do you guys use the same bowls as your kids? As my kids, yeah.

[Travis McElroy]

They've started using my grown up plates. Cause we've had like, you know, sets of like plastic matching colorful. Right. And then Theresa and I have grown up boring plates and my kids have started to notice that the grown up boring plates are larger than their child plates. And they're like, wait a minute, how come daddy's plate.

[Griffin McElroy]

How come daddy gets so much more cereal than I do when it's cereal time? My answer to that is I'm rocking one of these Martha Stewart square plates that we got from our wedding and are still fucking kicking all these years later. Thank you, Martha. These are square bowls. You're not ready for these, son. You don't know how to eat cereal out of a square bowl. You'll be so fucking confused.

[Travis McElroy]

What started happening now, Griffin, is I'll get them one of their plastic bowls out and get myself a white bowl. And they're like, can I have the white bowl? But I've already gotten the plastic bowl out. So guess who uses the plastic bowl?

[Griffin McElroy]

Nice.

[Travis McElroy]

This guy.

[Justin McElroy]

At some point I realized as an adult that I don't really like using anything breakable. So pretty much every. All of our plates are just recycled plastic bamboo. It's one of the best decisions I ever made. Just get a bunch of these recycled plastic bamboo plates. I don't need off adult plates anymore. I can't trust myself. Don't have glass. Glassware. Don't fuck with that. I just like plastic stuff.

[Griffin McElroy]

I like plastic stuff, but it's special. Not. It's special. Not micro plastic. No, it's juice. You gotta say.

[Justin McElroy]

That's what I'm saying.

[Griffin McElroy]

Oh, it's natural.

[Justin McElroy]

I already said that earlier.

[Travis McElroy]

I was gonna make a joke, Justin, about how you should get some plastic cafeteria trays with the sections on them. But then I thought, why did we ever let go of that?

[Justin McElroy]

This is what I'm saying.

[Travis McElroy]

I fucking love a section of.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah, yeah.

[Travis McElroy]

Where it's like, there's your corn. There's your.

[Griffin McElroy]

It's why I don't eat peas. It's why I don't eat peas. These motherfuckers go rogue.

[Travis McElroy]

Dude, have I told you about the utensil?

[Griffin McElroy]

They're also gross. They're also gross.

[Travis McElroy]

The utensil I want to invent.

[Justin McElroy]

Just say yes, Griffith. Just say yes. Just say yes.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yes.

[Travis McElroy]

Where it's like a little shovel. It's a spoon, but it's got a flat bottom and a flat front, so you can spoon.

[Griffin McElroy]

I can't believe we're hearing about spoofoon again.

[Travis McElroy]

It's like a child's, like, sand shovel. Right where it's, like, flat and you can really get the piece and kind of bulldoze them up.

[Griffin McElroy]

Dude.

[Travis McElroy]

Yeah.

[Griffin McElroy]

It's chefpoon you've told us about.

[Justin McElroy]

Chef Travis has been on meetings trying to pitch McKay to start manufacturing. They really want DFT. Travis really, really, really wants DFTBA to start manufacturing.

[Travis McElroy]

I'm saying we've had the same three main utensils for too long.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah.

[Travis McElroy]

It is time for our fourth option.

[Griffin McElroy]

You want a cutting. You want a cutting spoon? A cutting spoon.

[Travis McElroy]

I want a digging spoon. I want a flat shovel spoon, a flat bottom, raise sides so I can scoop up the peas.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah. Can I get serrated sides, though? If I need to cut something with maximum.

[Travis McElroy]

It's not a one off spoon, Griffin.

[Griffin McElroy]

It's not a whole. It would fuck your mouth up, wouldn't it?

[Justin McElroy]

Yeah.

[Griffin McElroy]

Don't put that in your mouth.

[Travis McElroy]

No. This is so I can come in at a flat, not have to tilt the side of my spoon to get to the peas. I can Just scrape the plate. Pick em up clean shovel.

[Griffin McElroy]

Hey.

[Justin McElroy]

Another kidivation that I have begun treating myself to again. And that is corn sheets. Oh.

[Travis McElroy]

Oh yeah. Slice off the corn. You slice off the corn on the cob so it comes off in one sheet. Hell yeah, brother.

[Justin McElroy]

I do think you like eating corn on the cob way. Do you have sheets off the cob? That's the stuff. The kernels will stick together, sometimes 20 or 30 in a clump. And you get to break them up like some kind of giant eating gold.

[Travis McElroy]

I like to pretend. Come on. Come on, Garmin. Bozia. I'm a beekeeper when that happens. And I'm carving like the wax off to like the honey out and it comes off and you get that great sound.

[Griffin McElroy]

Oh man. I don't want to be a beekeeper because I don't want to get stung. But is there a job where they let you just come up and cut the wax off of that? That shit when it comes off all soft and they make it into soap and stuff. God damn, that looks good.

[Travis McElroy]

That's all I want.

[Griffin McElroy]

That's all I want. I don't want to interface with the insects, but I would like to do. The bees are beautiful. I'm not a bee hater, but I don't. I'm scared of them. And I like the part where they

[Travis McElroy]

smoke them out where they're just like dropping some dank smoke in there to make the bees all sleepy. I think that part seems cool.

[Justin McElroy]

You want to share a bowl with your cat? That'll really.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah. You're talking about smoking. Like share your like weed.

[Justin McElroy]

Share a bowl. Share a bowl with your cat. 420Soak some kush with your cat.

[Griffin McElroy]

I've never met a cat where I've been like, what would make this cat better is if it was fucked up and crazy out of its mind.

[Justin McElroy]

That's the whole idea of catnip, man.

[Travis McElroy]

We gave.

[Justin McElroy]

We gave all of catnip and she sat on the couch for four hours.

[Griffin McElroy]

Damn, dude.

[Justin McElroy]

Yeah, dude. It was chill. She was like having a great time.

[Travis McElroy]

We should go to the Money Zone.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah. I'm so tired of talking about cats. Guys. Let's go to the Money Zone for a while.

[Montaigne]

It's better. It's better with you.

[Travis McElroy]

Hey, do you like cats?

[Griffin McElroy]

I love kitty cats, Travis. So much. Stinkers.

[Travis McElroy]

They are little stinkers and I love them so much. And you know what? I love kitties so much. They deserve the best, don't they?

[Griffin McElroy]

They do, right?

[Travis McElroy]

They're just like us. We deserve the Best. That's why I eat Smalls.

[Justin McElroy]

I serve my kitties. Smalls, though. Amelia and Olive, every day they have a routine. They come in, they wake up Sidney. Sidney goes in, she puts out the food. Olive goes over and eats the smalls first while Amelia patiently watches and waits her turn. Then after Olive's done, it's Amelia's turn for Smalls. And let me tell you, these kitties love it.

[Travis McElroy]

Your cats take turns?

[Griffin McElroy]

They do. That's crazy, man.

[Travis McElroy]

That's incredible, Justin.

[Justin McElroy]

That's common cat behavior. They wait for Sydney's affections, too. Olive will come over and get attention. And then Amelia will patiently wait her turn. And then once Olive's done.

[Griffin McElroy]

Sweet little baby angel. These baby angels is Nahla's Just the berry. Yeah.

[Justin McElroy]

How did I get them so well trained? Well, the answer is Smalls, the favorite with my kitties. If you're looking for a few to pick for your first round, Smooth Bird is their favorite. But they also like Smooth Other bird.

[Griffin McElroy]

Amazing naming conventions, if you know what I mean.

[Justin McElroy]

So stop guessing which meals will upset their stomach for a limited time because you are a My brother, My Brother and me listener. Get 60% off your first order, plus free shipping when you head to smalls.com mybrother one last time. That 60% off your first order, plus free shipping when you head to smalls.com

[Travis McElroy]

Mybrother Griffin, I wanted to say you are looking healthy, well rested, invigorated lately. Have you been taking care of yourself?

[Griffin McElroy]

I have, Travis. Thanks for asking. I've been taking care of my body, as has what I call Team Garden. This is a team of medical professionals that I have found through the ZOCDOC platform here in our nation's capital of Washington, D.C. where doctors legally have to hide. Did you guys know that in D.C. doctors, you can't find them. There's no way to just, like, go and find a doctor normally, because they're all. They're all hiding because they don't want you to come to their office because it's hard to do doctor stuff. ZOCDOC goes around the whole system. You go on Zocdoc.com, you say what you got going on, what your health insurance coverage is, where you live. They'll show you doctors in your area that are gonna be in network. They'll even let you schedule appointments right through the ding dang thing.

[Travis McElroy]

Griffin, I want you to know I picture Team G like one of those scenes in a movie where you're jogging on a treadmill and you Got sensors hooked up to you and you got a mask you're breathing into. Except in this movie, the doctors write something on a clipboard and then lean over and show one of the other ones the clipboard and they kind of

[Griffin McElroy]

shake their head like, no, no, no, no, not that one. No. I've got nothing but stone cold killers on team G, honestly. We have new health insurance this year here at Big Giant Head Incorporated, the actual business that us three do operate. And I had to find a bunch of new doctors because some of my old ones were in a network. And Zocdoc let me get that shit done in like an hour maybe and let me schedule the appointments and get everything going. It really is like, I don't know, it's such a pain in the ass to find doctors in D.C. i was kidding about all of them hiding, but it is a huge pain in the ass doing it. I imagine in any city of a certain scale, it seems a difficult process.

[Travis McElroy]

And if you have a pain in your ass.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yep.

[Travis McElroy]

Try ZocDoc to find a doctor who's right for you.

[Griffin McElroy]

So ZocDoc is a free app and website that lets you find and book high quality in network doctors so you can find someone you love. Stop putting off those doctor's appointments. Go to zocdoc.com my brother to find and instantly book a doctor you love today. That's zocdoc.com mybrothers zocdoc.com mybrotherS thanks Zocdoc for sponsoring this message.

[Max Fun Announcer]

Thank you to all the Max Fund members who supported us during Max Fund drive. You're helping us as we try to put more good into the world. And as part of putting more good into the world, we've opened our annual Post Drive charity sale. Max Fund members at $10 per month or more can purchase Max Fun Drive keychains featuring designs for shows across the network. And all members can buy our charity exclusive Keychain starring Mikey, our little Mike. Welcome back to microphone buddy from this year's Max Fund Drive. This year we've decided to send the proceeds of the charity sale to the center for Constitutional Rights. They're dedicated to the creative use of law as a positive force for social change. Tackling issues like human rights abuses, racial injustice, and sexual and gender based violence. These folks are fighting to make things better. So to get your keychains and support the center for Constitutional rights, head to maximumfun.org charitysales and if you're not yet a member, you can still get in on this to support the show you're listening to and get access to bonus content and the charity sale, Just click the link in the show notes. The sale is live now and it ends on Friday, May 15th. That's MaximumFun.org charitysale and thanks again.

[John Moe]

Sleep is important, but it's difficult sometimes. I'm John Moe on Sleeping with Celebrities. Famous people help conk you out by talking in soothing voices about unimportant things. Maria Bamford on parking.

[Justin McElroy]

I parked in a bus stop.

[Travis McElroy]

That's just not right.

[Griffin McElroy]

I am not a bus.

[John Moe]

Roxanne Gay on airports.

[Griffin McElroy]

My favorite airport is Indianapolis. It has a really smart layout.

[John Moe]

Alan Tudyk on yardsticks.

[Justin McElroy]

You hand somebody a yardstick, yardsticks become

[Griffin McElroy]

part of the family.

[John Moe]

Granted, it's a weird idea, but it's lots of fun and it works. Listen wherever you get. Podcasts.

[Griffin McElroy]

Hey, we've been doing kitty talk for so long. I don't usually show off, sort of like props in the office, but I do got to showcase this incredible gift I got from my father in law. It's the Garfield phone hat man. And when you pick up the. When you pick up the receiver, he

[Justin McElroy]

opens his eyes and he's really good. That's really good.

[Travis McElroy]

But if you do it at a

[Griffin McElroy]

certain level, it does look like he's like about to finish.

[Travis McElroy]

Oh, yeah, the Zhonya.

[Griffin McElroy]

That's lasagna.

[Travis McElroy]

I love Mondays.

[Griffin McElroy]

Oh, it's Tuesday. Garfield loves every other day.

[Travis McElroy]

Oh, he loves.

[Justin McElroy]

Sorry, they don't talk about that enough. That Garfield love. Loves Tuesdays and Wednesdays.

[Griffin McElroy]

Thursday, Thursday, all of them.

[Travis McElroy]

Yeah, he doesn't have a job. Why is Monday any different for him?

[Griffin McElroy]

John's gone. He loves John so much.

[Travis McElroy]

He does not love John.

[Griffin McElroy]

He does love John so much. Watch the Garfield movie with Chris Pratt. He loves that fucking guy. I would say it loud. Okay.

[Justin McElroy]

I wanna munch squad. One, two, munch squad.

[Travis McElroy]

It's the Olympics.

[Justin McElroy]

No, it's May the fourth be with you.

[Griffin McElroy]

Star Wars. Oh, awesome.

[Justin McElroy]

A thing.

[Travis McElroy]

I think that's more wanna munch squad, squad, squad Munching on my squad till

[Justin McElroy]

I Yoda to this tune of Indiana Jones.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah.

[Travis McElroy]

So munch, munch, munch, munch. It sound like that?

[Justin McElroy]

Yeah. May the fourth be with you.

[Griffin McElroy]

Munch, munch squad. Munch, munch, munch squad. Munch, munch, munch squad.

[Justin McElroy]

Nobody needs that though. You know, I could have done that.

[Travis McElroy]

Yeah, nobody needs it.

[Justin McElroy]

Nobody needed is May 4th. We have two. It's not like today maybe, I don't know. I Didn't check the date. When is May the fourth?

[Travis McElroy]

When this comes out?

[Justin McElroy]

Ish. Really?

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah. Hell yeah.

[Justin McElroy]

Check it out.

[Griffin McElroy]

Let's start over. Do a whole Star wars show. People loom.

[Travis McElroy]

People love that shit.

[Justin McElroy]

Crumbl has unveiled galaxy brownie cookie for Star wars inspired holiday. Crumbl's still around. Despite the badness of their cookies and their relative inedibility, people continue to consume their products.

[Travis McElroy]

Did you guys ever hear me, everyone?

[Justin McElroy]

Why does this make you hungry, baby?

[Travis McElroy]

Yeah.

[Justin McElroy]

Oh, look at this. Crumble cookies dripping chocolate.

[Travis McElroy]

I'll tell you, when I eat a cookie. What I want it to be is messy.

[Griffin McElroy]

I need a. Yeah, I need a messy perimeter, an unholdable perimeter around that cookie.

[Justin McElroy]

May 4th is almost here and crumbl is celebrating with something cosmic.

[Travis McElroy]

I care about that crumble.

[Justin McElroy]

Is that the deal? It's like a play on cosmic.

[Griffin McElroy]

It's a cosmic brownie. Yeah. Look at it. It's got the frosting. It's got the little multicolored little.

[Justin McElroy]

Did you guys hear about that galaxy brownie cookie?

[Griffin McElroy]

Travis has been making the same joke for? We got it.

[Justin McElroy]

Sorry.

[Griffin McElroy]

It's not a crumb. Let him fire it off.

[Justin McElroy]

Let's pull over the car.

[Griffin McElroy]

Hold on.

[Travis McElroy]

The crumble scam. This is true. Where somebody claimed crumbl was opening in Australia, but really what they did is they flew to New York, bought a bunch of boxes of crumbl cookies, flew back with them, and then sold them as if they were a crumbl affiliate store.

[Griffin McElroy]

That's fine. Yeah, that's legal to do. That is legal to do. There they are a lot more chill about this.

[Travis McElroy]

People did comment on the staleness of

[Griffin McElroy]

the cookies, I have to imagine.

[Justin McElroy]

Yeah.

[Griffin McElroy]

They were not fresh out the oven.

[Justin McElroy]

Galaxy brownie cookie available today only at crumble. So heartbreakingly, if you go tomorrow, you'll have to eat other crumbl cookies. So act fast. A brownie cookie smothered in warm fudge glaze and sprinkled with rainbow candy bits designed to be fudgy and delicious in every bite. Now, they don't say it is. They just said that was the goal.

[Travis McElroy]

That was our intention.

[Justin McElroy]

Right?

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah.

[Justin McElroy]

May 4th only comes once a year. So make it count with the galaxy brownie cookie before it's gone rich and fudgy and cosmic at every bite. The limited time galaxy brownie cookie will be available while supplies last. I mean, presumably. I hope you got enough to make

[Griffin McElroy]

it through today for one day. Crumble for one day.

[Travis McElroy]

I don't understand. When companies do especially like chains, you Know of, like, food places. Do a one day thing. The amount of, like, just planning to go into the cookie and then buying, like the ingredients and stuff to make it. How is just doing it in one day profitable in any way?

[Griffin McElroy]

It's not about profit, Trav. It's about the message. It's about letting people know that Crumble likes to have fun. People like Star Wars. So if Crumble can get in your brain and be like, crumble, Star Wars. Crumble, Star Wars. Crumble, Star Wars. And then any other time you think of one of your favorite Star wars guys, Darth Sidious, Darth Grievous, then you're gonna say like, damn, I wanna eat one of those fudgy Crumble cookies right now. But you can't because they were.

[Travis McElroy]

But they're not available.

[Griffin McElroy]

But they're not available.

[Justin McElroy]

They're not available now. What sucks is like, this is. I have this. That was unlicensed, which you could tell. Doesn't it have big game energy?

[Griffin McElroy]

Like, wait, do they not say Star wars at all?

[Justin McElroy]

During the headline they say Star Wars Holiday inspired, which they can. Yeah, say that. Vicious. This is this. I like this better because this. Just go for it. Vicious Biscuit releases Spicy Hen Solo Chicken Biscuit. Now we're talking.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah, dude.

[Justin McElroy]

The home, the original home of unapologetically bold biscuits is introducing the spicy copyright infringement. I know. Hin Solo available 25.

[Griffin McElroy]

This feels like a Muppet baby's ass. Like, I know. I love it. Where they're make believe in a Star wars story. Gonzo's got.

[Justin McElroy]

They are. They are not. Okay, now see, here's the thing. They have not to this point, tipped their hand in any way other than calling it a Hin Solo Biscuit. They are terrified. They're so scared. Yeah.

[Travis McElroy]

Is it because the biscuit is traveling alone?

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah.

[Justin McElroy]

The Spicy Hen Solo builds on one of the brand's most popular items and introduces a dry season heat profile that expands the flavor range of its chicken lineup while maintaining the sandwich's easy on the go appeal.

[Travis McElroy]

Dry season makes it seem like it's in between. Like the wet season. It's just like, yeah, crops aren't growing. This is the chicken we've got, man.

[Griffin McElroy]

It's been a bad year for the vineyard.

[Travis McElroy]

This is our dust bowl chicken sandwich.

[Justin McElroy]

Now, guys, we're gonna get into. We're gonna get into the real. The real.

[Griffin McElroy]

Okay, so someone actually got the partnership.

[Justin McElroy]

Yes. It's BK too. So, you know, they're going big. So let's talk about the offerings for the Mandalorian and Grogu. Only in theaters May 22nd.

[Travis McElroy]

Oh, that crown. Oh, that crown.

[Justin McElroy]

Justin, first off, we got. We're going to go item by item here. Don't get ahead of us. We got Trav. You can tell about the crown, though, because it's like, it's really good.

[Travis McElroy]

You know how the Mandalorian.

[Justin McElroy]

Right. It would be crazy.

[Travis McElroy]

You know how the Mandalorian has a big T on his face for Travis? Well, in this crown, you can see the top of the T for Travis, but then still the Burger King crown part with the flat clovers and stuff. Yeah, like how the Mandalorian always wears his crown. His, like, helmet kind of precariously perched on top of his head, ready to push it down at any moment, it

[Griffin McElroy]

looks like to me. Juice. They got two different cups with Grogu on it.

[Justin McElroy]

Let's talk about it, Griff. They're once again targeting the family. This dining occasion. This time it's with Star wars, arguably the most widely known collaboration the brand has done in years.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah.

[Justin McElroy]

The new menu promotes the upcoming movie the Mandalorian and Grogu. First up is the BBQ Bounty Whopper, which is layered with bacon, Swiss cheese, vegetables.

[Travis McElroy]

Too hard?

[Griffin McElroy]

No, it can't possibly say vegetables. It can't possibly say vegetables on it.

[Travis McElroy]

It says vegetable. Hold on, I'll scroll down.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah, because I fully am not going to believe this until I see it. Sweet.

[Travis McElroy]

Yeah.

[Griffin McElroy]

Layered with bacon, Swiss cheese, vegetables, and a barbecue based sauce. You lost the plot at the end there.

[Travis McElroy]

Vegetables and a barbecue based sauce. We got acorn squash on here. This thing's hot.

[Griffin McElroy]

Fresh out, huh?

[Travis McElroy]

Yeah, dude.

[Justin McElroy]

Actually, this whole fucking thing's jackfruit soup to nothing.

[Travis McElroy]

It's all jackfruit, baby. Gotcha.

[Justin McElroy]

There's Grogu's blue cookie shake.

[Travis McElroy]

Hey, scroll back up so I can see that picture again, because the one that's blowing my mind is like, the chicken dippers box. Grogu's ears stick out from the side of the box of, like, chicken sticks. The chicken sticks. Am I to believe that the employees are.

[Justin McElroy]

Chicken fries?

[Travis McElroy]

Chicken fries. Am I to believe that the Burger King workers have to fold those out?

[Griffin McElroy]

Have to deploy Grogu's ears before each serving. Yeah.

[Travis McElroy]

What a wild ad.

[Justin McElroy]

If you haven't been to DQ in a while, when they take your Blizzard. Dq. If you haven't been to DQ in a while, when they hand you your Blizzard and before they hand it to you, they flip it upside down, that's probably going to freak you out, but it Is something they all have to do. The ears are just like that. It's just part of your routine. You have to pop out the ears. I'm sorry.

[Travis McElroy]

Get used to it. I'm trying to decide what's going on on the box of chicken nugs because it looks like it's like the top.

[Justin McElroy]

I don't think those are nugs, brother.

[Travis McElroy]

Three percent of the Mandalorian's helmet. But then the top of it, you get to color in yourself as to what you think these are.

[Griffin McElroy]

Potato croquettes.

[Justin McElroy]

Sure.

[Travis McElroy]

But what's on the box?

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah, what's on the box? There we go. It's a stormtrooper. It's not the mando.

[Travis McElroy]

It's a stormtrooper. Okay.

[Justin McElroy]

This new menu promotes the upcoming movie Mandalorian Grogu, scheduled to reach theaters May 22nd. Okay, yeah, we heard about veggie burgers. The sandwich is placed in packaging. This is really. The sandwich is placed in packaging that mirrors a bounty hunter's helmet. Then there's Grogu's blue cookie shake, Grogu's garlic chicken fries, and imperial cheddar ranch tots.

[Griffin McElroy]

Okay, so, like, first off, the box mirrors. A bounty hunter's helmet is so fucking wrong headed. It's so wild. This is Mandalorian armor that they crafted in the Mandalorian wars. They're so Greedo, motherfucker. Heard of him? Does he wear a big helmet? I don't think so.

[Justin McElroy]

I don't think that was. His armor's made of a very special metal that lots of dorks know about.

[Griffin McElroy]

It's like, not a joke, but it's not. A bounty hunter. Is a job. And there isn't, like a uniform that you. There's so many. Star wars bounty hunter.

[Justin McElroy]

Greedo was a bounty hunter. He didn't wear a stupid hat.

[Travis McElroy]

I just said, have you guys even seen Greedo? He doesn't wear Bounty hunt.

[Griffin McElroy]

The proportions of his Brody and helmet skull. You can fit one of these helmets on it.

[Travis McElroy]

But it's also specifically the Mandalorian, like the main character of the movie. Why did they make it vague like they don't have the rights to say the Mandalorian?

[Justin McElroy]

It does sound because this is a news story, Travis. This is original reporting on it by qsr and I'm trying to tell you about it. Additionally, customers can receive one of four collectible cups by buying a bounty bundle.

[Travis McElroy]

Dad, did you hear that? Clint?

[Griffin McElroy]

Dad. Clint. They have collectible cups smashing through my window. Kool aid man style.

[Justin McElroy]

No. This sucks, guys. This is no, no, no, no, no. This sucks. Additionally, customers can receive one of four collectible cups by buying a Bounty bundle, a special box featuring all four items. A barbecue bounty whopper combo or a 12 piece Grogu's garlic Chicken Fry Combo. Clint Emil Macaroy, Slow down the car, turn around, go home. Don't.

[Travis McElroy]

Dad.

[Justin McElroy]

If you pick up my kids from school and you come home with a bunch of this sloppy food and Star wars stuff, that would kick ass, actually.

[Travis McElroy]

Exactly. Yeah, actually, yeah. Take it all around.

[Griffin McElroy]

Dad.

[Travis McElroy]

Dad, dad.

[Griffin McElroy]

Do it, dad. Do it.

[Justin McElroy]

But bring it to me to enjoy in private.

[Travis McElroy]

Deliver on your eldest. Dad.

[Justin McElroy]

Doordash it to me, dad.

[Travis McElroy]

Dad.

[Griffin McElroy]

Justin, some of his Grogu fries. Dad.

[Justin McElroy]

Dash it, dad.

[Griffin McElroy]

Dash it, dad. Dash the Grogu fries.

[Travis McElroy]

Perfect. I am looking at these, like, potato cheddar cheese things.

[Griffin McElroy]

I think they're fried Mac and cheese. Maybe they.

[Travis McElroy]

What were they, Justin? The cheese.

[Justin McElroy]

I'm not there yet because you.

[Travis McElroy]

You mentioned it.

[Justin McElroy]

Yeah, you're right. They're Cheddar Ranch tots. Sorry.

[Travis McElroy]

No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

[Justin McElroy]

Imperial Cheddar Ranch.

[Travis McElroy]

Thank you very much. If I bit into these, not having been told that they were Imperial Ranch Tots and that is what I found in the middle of it, I would assume something had gone terribly wrong at the factory or wherever these came from.

[Griffin McElroy]

There's some texture to it. That's. Yeah.

[Justin McElroy]

A King Junior meal tied to the same theme. The Mandalorian and Grogu King Jr. Meal becomes available April 28. It will comprise a choice of hamburger or four piece nugget, applesauce and kids fry choice of milk or apple juice and Mandalorian themed toy.

[Travis McElroy]

So not like Grogu would eat.

[Griffin McElroy]

Not Imperial apple juice. Like, they didn't really have much fun with the kids meal. It sounds like they saved all of it for adult nerds.

[Travis McElroy]

Because the second I looked at my child, my 5 year old, and I said, do you want Imperial fries? They'd say, no, I want normal fries. And I say, honey, they only have Imperial. Like, I don't know if those of

[Justin McElroy]

us have watched a lot of YouTube content about baby Yoda eating chicken nuggies. Yeah, that was a big. I know. It's a big thing. So maybe they're just like trying to tap into that power of baby Yoda.

[Griffin McElroy]

Just want to let you know, Juice, because you've lost perspective completely that non parents think that what you just said sounded so insane.

[Justin McElroy]

Search YouTube. Search YouTube.

[Travis McElroy]

Don't.

[Griffin McElroy]

There's just videos of Grog scary on there.

[Justin McElroy]

Burger King Was involved. This is the sentence. The connection between the brand and the franchise is not new. Burger King was involved in promotions tied to the original Star wars release decades ago. Dude. Okay, Ben, with all due respect, man, I don't know if one of your parents was a. Was a passive voice sentence or something, but we got to get active with these sentences. We gotta. We gotta get active voice. The campaign is structured to reach across that range of guests. The chain plans to promote the new menu via social media, digital engagement and advertising, building collaboration. Walt Disney Studios.

[Travis McElroy]

We're trying to get people to watch the movie and eat the food. So we're advertising it.

[Justin McElroy]

Trav, you think you're having fun now? Listen to this quote from cnn.

[Travis McElroy]

Wait, I also want to jump back. The lack of clarity in the claim that Burger King partnered with them for the release of Star wars decades ago could include so many different things that they're talking about. Are you talking about the release of the original trilogy, like six years ago?

[Griffin McElroy]

The BK get in on the ground floor.

[Travis McElroy]

Are you talking about.

[Justin McElroy]

Always been part of it. Joel Yashinsky says we've got a ton of fun, social engagement and creative plan for the launch of this program.

[Griffin McElroy]

Awesome.

[Justin McElroy]

It's cool. Everything we do is not about a one hit boost to the business.

[Griffin McElroy]

Wow. We're playing 40 chess with grub.

[Travis McElroy]

Yeah. We're trying to grow our stock value to appease our stockholders.

[Justin McElroy]

This is the one where it got so intimate, where I felt like, should I go? He said, we work with what the property is and find natural innovation and ideas that come from the partnership specifically.

[Travis McElroy]

First you're giving it all away.

[Griffin McElroy]

Whoever this is is like really keyed in.

[Justin McElroy]

Joel Kushinsky is probably my favorite person

[Travis McElroy]

who we've had on this show so far.

[Griffin McElroy]

It's like the things they're saying are so, so reasonable.

[Justin McElroy]

Yeah, we put the fucking little guy on the box.

[Travis McElroy]

You know what I mean?

[Justin McElroy]

Like, kids love this little idiot put on the box.

[Travis McElroy]

We had meetings where we, like, agreed on the budget for the ad campaign and, like, what the designs would be. And then like, we put those on there and then we, like put them up for sale.

[Justin McElroy]

McDonald's was going to give them some money and then we offered them actually, like a little bit more money than that.

[Travis McElroy]

Yeah.

[Griffin McElroy]

So. And we're reporting crumble. We're reporting all of the places that are doing these unauthorized partnerships.

[Justin McElroy]

All these.

[Griffin McElroy]

God, I love Grogu.

[Justin McElroy]

I do love Grogu. Can I just. So that's the. That's all I got to tell you. About the grogu meal. Definitely gonna be buying a lot of those. But I do, I. I do just want to show you guys there is some new merch doing the Disney parks.

[Travis McElroy]

Okay.

[Justin McElroy]

You know how I feel about May 4, and I'm gonna share this tab with you because, like, things are getting a little twisted this year with the merch. Because we are getting. We've been waiting for it a long time. We got Darkseid theme merch coming this year.

[Travis McElroy]

Oh, yeah, Finally. Darth Maul ears.

[Justin McElroy]

Darth Maul ears. Dude, that's twisted. Celebrate your allegiance for Shadow Lord himself. Darth Maul with an ear headband featuring. Look at this, guys. Look at this fucking dude.

[Griffin McElroy]

Holy fucking.

[Justin McElroy]

Featuring his iconic. Yes, right.

[Griffin McElroy]

Look at that. We're looking at a Darth Maul graphic tee with a long sleeve tee underneath that says Darth Maul on the sleeve.

[Travis McElroy]

It says Darth Maul on the sleeves.

[Griffin McElroy]

It's so goddamn cool.

[Justin McElroy]

For those who want to wear their dark side pride on their sleeve. Get it? That's not me editorializing. That's what the words say. This Darth Maul inspired tee from her universe is available only on disneystore.com.

[Travis McElroy]

that's awesome. That's not a play on words.

[Griffin McElroy]

Awesome, dude.

[Travis McElroy]

That's not a play on words. Look at this.

[Griffin McElroy]

Look at this fashionable dark side city jacket. Holy sh. I mean, it kind of slapped.

[Travis McElroy]

Can you imagine if you were wearing that and ran into, like, Darth Vader, who for some reason existed in real life? And he'd be like, what the fuck am I doing in your jacket?

[Griffin McElroy]

We gotta describe this shit. So we're looking at a circuit. This is a varsity jacket. On the back of the jacket, large, large circular emblem, and it has some flare on the top and bottom of it. It says join the dark side at the bottom. And then we have two Darth Vader helmets looking away from each other within the circular emblem. And then right between those, it says Darth Vader in a sort of vertical form. Just the name Darth Vader. Just the name Darth Vader.

[Travis McElroy]

Darth Vader. It looks like the name has sliced Darth Vader's head in half. Yeah, and it's just like the two sides fell away.

[Griffin McElroy]

Join the dark side. Darth Vader's dead now. And there's an opening.

[Justin McElroy]

Oh, God. With embroidery, artwork, and an invitation to join the dark side of the back. Even the darkest of Sith Lord won't be able to resist this purchase come May 4th. I know I won't.

[Griffin McElroy]

Who the Fuck are you?

[Travis McElroy]

Who are you?

[Justin McElroy]

This is. Well, this is.

[Travis McElroy]

That's written by Darth Maul.

[Griffin McElroy]

This is Disney Parks blog. Okay, I thought this was a Disney press release.

[Justin McElroy]

Sorry. Also this.

[Griffin McElroy]

I mean, the pod racing merch fucks.

[Justin McElroy]

This kind of kicks ass. Guys, they got pod racing merch, but we can't. Like, actually, yeah, it's, like, not. Well, we could just look for a second.

[Travis McElroy]

Oh, sick fuck. Yeah.

[Justin McElroy]

Dude, then Moss Espa shirt. That's grif. That's cool as hell, though.

[Griffin McElroy]

Dude.

[Travis McElroy]

You totally wear that now.

[Justin McElroy]

Look at this. They got a Skywalker racing jacket.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah. Sort of a pit crew NASCAR vibe. But it does say Mos Espa on the front. And on the back, it says Skywalker in big letters.

[Travis McElroy]

It looks like it was actually, like, crew swag for a movie about Skywalker racing at Monchetspa. No.

[Griffin McElroy]

You guys remember in Phantom Menace when the little boy walks out there and he gets it, but he's wearing his fucking cool jacket like he's Lightning McQueen or something.

[Justin McElroy]

Yes.

[Griffin McElroy]

Like Days of Thunder sort of style. And everyone's like, oh, it's Anakin. He's so fucking cool.

[Travis McElroy]

And he just turns and says, kachow.

[Justin McElroy]

Yeah, my name is Justin McElroy. I need to. Yes, I'm calling in regards to my dad Clint McRoy's credit card. I need to cancel it. Please don't let him make any charges for the next week because he's gonna buy fucking four of these jackets. Like, I just know it, man. Please, please, Clint, can you make one

[Travis McElroy]

for himself or one for him and three for us?

[Griffin McElroy]

You know, he'll get us matching ones.

[Justin McElroy]

Anyway, that's all the May 4th magic coming for you. Dang. I wish I hadn't secretly wanted that racing gear so much at the end. I really feel like it really took the wind out of my sails.

[Travis McElroy]

Hey, speaking of magic, I want to say thank you sincerely for all the support we received in the MAX Fund Drive. It is a magical time of year that reminds me every year reminds us about the community that we've built and the support we get every year. And thank you again. It really does mean the world to us.

[Justin McElroy]

Thank you. Yeah. Thank you.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah. I want to thank Montaigne for the historic theme song, My Life Is Better with youh. It is such an amazing energy that it conjures up that we then kind of just like, surf the wave for, you know, an hour of jokes. I'm so very, very grateful. I also wanted to say thank you to everybody who came out to the Renaissance Fair this past weekend.

[Justin McElroy]

God, I hope so many times.

[Griffin McElroy]

I hope some people come to see us at the Renaissance Fair.

[Travis McElroy]

I'm sure somebody was there.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah. Thank you for all of your support over all of these years. It means more than we could ever say.

[Justin McElroy]

Yeah, you're the best.

[Griffin McElroy]

We got some merch over at the merch store, mcelroymerch.com we got the count donut piss vault sticker that Nate Freeberg made that keeps count donuts cape safe and free of urine. Got some new mugs. Gotta don't talk to me until I've had my. Oh, these are here. They're here. New mugs from the 100% podcast sort of line. We got don't talk to me till I've had my podcast on mug. And then there's also a beautiful glass mug that says I like all buts and no government. Which also you can get in a digital cross stitch pattern. This corner of the market.

[Justin McElroy]

That's wild if you think about it. But it all starts with me stopping at that weird chevron on Hal Grier.

[Travis McElroy]

You know what I mean?

[Justin McElroy]

And not having a coffee cup.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah. There's also.

[Justin McElroy]

You can get sliding doors, you know, sliding doors.

[Griffin McElroy]

You can also get with one of these mugs, a new strain of tea. My brother, My brother in tea you can buy it either by itself or in a bottle.

[Justin McElroy]

Testosterone, by the way. We are not making our own line of testosterone.

[Griffin McElroy]

That would be sick. But no, it's t e a like the hot beverage with all the flavors and stuff. You can get that either alone or in a bundle with one of these amazing mugs. 10% of all of our merch proceeds this month will be donated to First Nations Development Institute. Their mission is to uplift and sustain the lifeways and economies of native communities through advocacy, financial support and knowledge sharing. One last thing also you can pre order the Adventure Zone story and song the last book in the Adventure Zone Balance graphic novel adaptation series. [e-mail] we've got it. We got our advanced copies in and it's a really, really beautiful thing. I'm so very proud of it and excited for it to come out.

[Justin McElroy]

You say so yourself.

[Travis McElroy]

Jesus. Actually, one last, last thing. We donated an attendance package for Champions Grove to the NO Theater of Cincinnati to help them raise money for their next season. They put it up for auction so you can go there. Bidding goes until May 8th at 9am and is your last chance to get to attend Champions Grove this year. You can go to Bit ly Cgauction and bid on it there and possibly get to come to Champions Grove this year and support the no Theater of Cincinnati, which is a wonderful theater here in Cincinnati. Does a lot of great stuff. Yeah, go check it out. Bit Ly Cgauction.

[Griffin McElroy]

I have a. I have a little thing of antibiotic ointment. I don't know.

[Travis McElroy]

Can you make it explode when it hits the wall? That'd be cool. Can I throw the.

[Justin McElroy]

Should I throw the sunglasses? If they break, then that's like a sign that I shouldn't do this anymore.

[Griffin McElroy]

Okay. Yeah. They're not expensive sunglasses, right?

[Travis McElroy]

I don't buy.

[Justin McElroy]

Fuck. Listen, minisobox. I don't fucking buy expensive sunglasses.

[Travis McElroy]

I know, my dumb ass.

[Justin McElroy]

No more than $10 on these motherfuckers.

[Montaigne]

Yeah.

[Griffin McElroy]

They'll end up in the ocean for sure.

[Justin McElroy]

All right, I got it. I got to take my headphones off.

[Griffin McElroy]

That's fine.

[Justin McElroy]

I don't want to put them back in though, so.

[Griffin McElroy]

Yeah, and say your name.

[Justin McElroy]

Okay, they're already out. Sorry, guys. They're out.

[Griffin McElroy]

Okay. Don't throw them at the chair. Throw at the wall. He can't hear us. At the wall.

[Travis McElroy]

Wow, that's pretty cool, actually.

[Griffin McElroy]

It did actually go right into camera. That looks fucking sick. Wait, what's he looking for? It didn't look like they split into several pieces. Oh, we lost one lens.

[Travis McElroy]

Yeah, there we go.

[Griffin McElroy]

We lost one lens, but they're still functional.

[Travis McElroy]

They broke. They broke. It's done.

[Justin McElroy]

They broke. It's done.

[Griffin McElroy]

Say your name.

[Justin McElroy]

It's done. I can't hear what you're saying, but say your name.

[Travis McElroy]

Your name. Justin.

[Griffin McElroy]

Say your name.

[Travis McElroy]

Say your name. My name. Name. It's Justin. You guys know that. My name's Travis McElroy.

[Griffin McElroy]

I'm Griffin McElroy.

[Justin McElroy]

This has been my brother.

[Travis McElroy]

My brother, me.

[Justin McElroy]

Kiss your dad square on the lips.

[Montaigne]

It's better. It's better with you. It's better. It's better with you. Is it true?

[Justin McElroy]

You are.

[Montaigne]

It's better, it's better with you. It's better with you.

[Griffin McElroy]

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