538 - 726 Demerits

Summary

My Favorite Murder – Episode 538: 726 Demerits

Podcast: My Favorite Murder with Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark
Date: June 25, 2026
Episode Theme:
This episode, hosted by Karen and Georgia, explores the true story of Buffalo Calf Road Woman—a Northern Cheyenne warrior whose actions were crucial in the defeat of George Armstrong Custer at the Battle of Little Bighorn. The hosts use their signature blend of humor, candid discussion, and a commitment to centering marginalized narratives to tell the story largely erased from mainstream American history.

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Episode Overview

This episode commemorates the 150th anniversary of the Battle of Little Bighorn (a.k.a. Custer’s Last Stand) by centering on previously obscured Native stories—specifically, the extraordinary heroism of Buffalo Calf Road Woman. The episode is bookended by the usual comedic banter between Karen and Georgia, but the core is a carefully researched, emotionally resonant recounting of this important but often overlooked figure in US history.

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Banter, Beards, and “Witness” Assignments

Time: 02:28–07:22

• The hosts indulge in some “beard talk,” referencing past stories with chinstrap beards and joking about their frequency in historical true crime:
  • “You've been sprinkling some neckbeard into these stories here and there.” — Georgia (04:00)
• Social media comments about chinstrap beards are read aloud for comedic effect.
• Karen assigns Georgia to watch the 1985 film “Witness” (starring Harrison Ford) due to its extreme display of neckbeard fashion among Amish men.
• A playful discussion about Rotten Tomatoes scores influencing their movie-watching choices.

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Podcast Network Highlights

Time: 07:22–08:26

• Karen and Georgia promote various podcasts on the Exactly Right network, including “Disgraceland” and “Ghosted,” and encourage listeners to join their fan cult for ad-free episodes and exclusive merch.

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Main Story: Buffalo Calf Road Woman and the Battle of Little Bighorn

Time: 11:34–36:58

Setting the Stage: Why This Story Matters

• Karen introduces the story, inspired by a TikTok from Mary Kate Teske, and marks the historical anniversary.
• Central theme: Shifting the lens from the white-centric narrative of Little Bighorn to the Cheyenne experience, emphasizing oral histories lost or ignored by traditional American education.

“Today is the 150th anniversary of one of the most infamous battles in American history, the Battle of Little Bighorn, also known as Custer's Last Stand.”
— Karen (12:56)

Background: The Cheyenne and Manifest Destiny

• The Cheyenne were a vibrant, horse-centric culture with flexible gender roles, including numerous accounts of women fighting alongside men:
  • "Women were adept at using a variety of weapons, including the gun." – Reading from Rosemary and Joseph Van Gnitto (15:13)
• The US’s Manifest Destiny mindset fueled settler encroachment and military violence against Native nations, often via broken treaties and violent land grabs.
• The 1844 birth of Buffalo Calf Road Woman is contextualized against escalating hostilities.

Buffalo Calf Road Woman’s Life

• Due to assimilation and cultural erasure, very little concrete is known about Buffalo Calf Road Woman’s early life, but oral tradition emphasizes her training and bravery, especially as violence increased.

George Armstrong Custer: The Other Side

• Karen details Custer’s mediocre schooling (a record 726 demerits at West Point) and his rise in military rank through a combination of bravado and self-mythologizing.
  • "He had an unbelievable 726 demerits." — Karen (20:16)
• She labels Custer a “sociopath” and details his history of self-aggrandizement and unauthorized, flashy behavior.
• Custer’s involvement in violent attacks (including the Sand Creek and Washita massacres), and continual shifting of US treaties to dispossess Native peoples.

The Cheyenne Resistance

• The Battle of the Rosebud (1876): Buffalo Calf Road Woman famously saves her brother Comes In Sight, riding into battle to pull him to safety—earning the Native name, “the fight where the girl saved her brother.”
  • “She rides so fast, no bullets can strike her...she pulls her brother up onto her horse and gets him to safety.” — Karen (28:25)

The Battle of Little Bighorn (Custer’s Last Stand)

• Eight days after Rosebud, Custer attacks a much larger Native encampment, dangerously underestimating their numbers and skill.
• In under an hour, Custer and his 200 men are annihilated.
• For over a century, official history remains silent or mythicizes these last moments. In 2005, Cheyenne oral history is publicly shared:
  • Buffalo Calf Road Woman is revealed as the warrior who knocked Custer off his horse.
• The Cheyenne oral tradition says she stayed “out in the open...she stayed on her horse the entire time.” (31:53)
• The story remained secret for fear of harsher US military reprisals.

Aftermath and Erasure

• Buffalo Calf Road Woman and her family are forced (with others) onto a reservation in Oklahoma, later joining the Northern Cheyenne Exodus back to Montana. Many, including her, die during or soon after the journey.
• Custer is immortalized in countless books and artworks; Buffalo Calf Road Woman has no confirmed photo, her memory surviving only through Cheyenne oral tradition and the efforts of contemporary Native advocates.

“There isn't a single confirmed portrait of Buffalo Calf Road Woman to be found. And most of the images that you see online of her use either misidentified photos...or slop AI.”
— Karen (34:13)

Modern Battle Over Historical Memory

• Karen references a 2026 directive from the Trump administration to rewrite or remove texts in national parks that “could be seen as critical of the US government,” directly threatening Cheyenne memory at Little Bighorn Battlefield.

“Just fucking rewrite history, why don't you?”
— Georgia (35:06)

• Cheyenne leaders fight back against this revisionism, stating,
  • “This attempt to change or remove tribal markers and monuments dims the light of the healing and progress we have all made.” — Cheyenne press release (36:01)

Legacy

• The episode closes with a Cheyenne saying:
  • “A nation is not conquered until the hearts of its women are on the ground. Then it is done. No matter how brave its warriors or how strong its weapons. Buffalo Calf Road Woman’s heart was never on the ground. She stayed on her horse the whole time.”
    — (36:09)

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Reflection and Action

Time: 36:58–38:02

• Georgia and Karen express deep gratitude and awe for Buffalo Calf Road Woman, emphasizing the countless erased stories of Native women.
• They announce a $10,000 donation to the Native American Rights Fund and encourage listeners to give: “[NARF] fights to protect Native American rights, resources and lifeways through litigation, legal advocacy and legal expertise.” — Karen (37:51)

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Honking Hoorays (“Listener Wins”)

Time: 42:18–45:51

• Lighthearted segment reading celebratory, uplifting listener stories, including coming out victories, happy hour, mortgage pay offs, and joining water aerobics.
  • “If you’re at happy hour, your life is going well.” — Karen (43:41)
  • “This morning, I flipped the eggs without bursting the yolks. I finally found the perfect oil to heat ratio...Just letting the world know that Megan T. had her egg victory this morning.” — Karen (45:28)

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• “It's like he left comments in his own section being like, I love this. He's so brave. What a great leader.” – Georgia, on Custer self-mythologizing (21:45)
• “I wish we could have the actual, like, historical story, because I bet it's even more badass.” – Georgia (36:58)
• “How many stories have been lost of people just like her because of the annihilation of the genocide of the Native American people in this country.” – Karen (37:13)
• “Stay sexy. Don’t get murdered. Goodbye, Elvis.” – Podcast signature close (46:00)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• [02:28] – Beard banter & “Witness” assignment
• [11:34] – Transition to Buffalo Calf Road Woman’s story
• [12:56] – Historical anniversary & intent to tell a different narrative
• [19:58] – Introduce Custer and his infamous “726 demerits”
• [28:25] – Buffalo Calf Road Woman rescues her brother at the Battle of the Rosebud
• [31:38] – Cheyenne oral testimony: Buffalo Calf Road Woman strikes the decisive blow at Little Bighorn
• [35:06] – Discussion of contemporary efforts to erase Cheyenne narratives
• [36:09] – Cheyenne proverb and closing tribute

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Tone & Style

• Language/Tone: Candid, wry, deeply empathetic, occasionally irreverent, always intent on centering marginalized voices while maintaining a relatable, conversational vibe.
• Approach: Mixes well-researched history with personal reactions, humor, and calls to action, encouraging listeners to educate themselves and support Native rights.

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Summary

Episode 538 of My Favorite Murder is a powerful blend of comedy podcasting and historical recovery, honoring Buffalo Calf Road Woman on the 150th anniversary of her greatest act of resistance. Through storytelling, reflection, and direct action, Karen and Georgia spotlight a largely erased figure in American history, challenging listeners to seek out unheard narratives and tangibly support justice for Native communities.

Transcript

[Karen Kilgariff]

This is exactly right.

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[Karen Kilgariff]

it's Karen and Georgia from My Favorite Murder.

[Georgia Hardstark]

We cruised around LA in the Hyundai Ioniq 5 and dove into the fascinating life of actress and inventor Hedy Lamarr.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Want the full story? Take a listen.

[Georgia Hardstark]

She starts dating Howard Hughes and in fact, she helps him design a faster plane. So she finds the fastest bird and the fastest fish and sketches out a drawing of what the two would look like as a plane. And that becomes the plane that we know today. And he calls her a genius. Check out our new episode spotlighting groundbreaking innovators like Hedy and Lamarr and Billie J.E. king.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Presented by the Hyundai Ionic 5. Goodbye. My fav. Hello, and welcome to my favorite murder. That's Georgia Hartstar, that's Karen Kilgariff, and we're about to take you on an emotional journey of the soul. I love that it just came out

[Georgia Hardstark]

of the podcast soul.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It's located in your ears, in your eardrum.

[Georgia Hardstark]

The long, dark tea time of the podcast soul. Okay. Hi. You had something to show me.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Tell me.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Okay.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Hi. I had to do this.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Oh, well, the thing I was gonna show you is. So in episode 533, an exercise in frustration, I told a story that featured many, many chinstrap beards.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Right.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And it was about Elizabeth Packard, who was the woman who was institutionalized, but her husband sent her to an insane asyl. And then she got out, fought for everybody's rights. But talking about her husband, it was this man, Theodopolis Packard, and his.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Theodopolis Theopolis. So one of the best things about

[Karen Kilgariff]

this, you're truly the most proud of that one. It was pretty great. It was pretty great in the moment, but we were really enjoying his chinstrap years. They also came up in the Henderson Llewellyn story, where the Quaker sex cult story that I recently told. They've just been around us recently.

[Georgia Hardstark]

You've been sprinkling some neckbeard into these stories here and there.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And the listeners have responded.

[Georgia Hardstark]

That's right. Did we get chinstrap hate mail?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yes, but no. It was essentially just people in the comments section talking about it. And so basically, Jenny Scram on Instagram says it looks like John C. Reilly is dressed up and doing a bit, which is very true. Dressed up, but just in the bottom half of a beard. Erin Jelisa on Instagram says the chinstrap beard was as bad as I imagined. Thank. What in the Hellsby says. How is this episode not called Beards abound? Great question. Baseballgirl247 says I needed to see that chinstrap beard to really get that story. Yeah, it's terrifying.

[Georgia Hardstark]

It's like, is that worse or a mullet worse? It's like an old timey mullet party in the front.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I think this is worse, though, because this makes no goddamn sense. The chin is bare.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah, but they can eat soup. And I bet there was a lot of soup going around then.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And stews and stews and porridges, which

[Georgia Hardstark]

is so hard to do when you have a beard. I've heard.

[Karen Kilgariff]

My husband says, I just love that people got into that as well.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

So then it gave me this idea.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Okay.

[Karen Kilgariff]

When you gave me the assignment of Watching the drama, right?

[Georgia Hardstark]

Oh, no. Are you gonna make me grow a neckbeard?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yes. And you have to do it in one week. I wanna give you the assignment of you watch a movie called Witness, which has so many neckbirds in it, you wouldn't believe it.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Okay.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And then we're gonna talk about that movie.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Which one is that?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Harrison Ford. Kelly McGillis. Lucas Haas. Harrison Ford goes undercover in an Amish settlement. I don't know.

[Georgia Hardstark]

What do they call themselves? What year is it from?

[Karen Kilgariff]

It's from like 89.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Okay, so Lucas Haas is a little boy.

[Karen Kilgariff]

He is the best child actor.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I had the biggest crush on him. He is so good.

[Karen Kilgariff]

The legend. Yeah, he's so good in this movie. Like, it's so real. Okay, I think you're going to. Really?

[Georgia Hardstark]

Should I text Vince and see if. I've already seen it and just totally forgot?

[Karen Kilgariff]

But I feel like if I said Harrison Ford goes undercover with the Amish, you would have gone. Oh yeah, I've seen that.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I haven't seen it also.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And that's very much tied to. So Witnesses, your assignment just in honor of the chinstrap beard.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Got it.

[Karen Kilgariff]

But then also after that, we might do a Harrison Ford assignment of I must have you watch the Fugitive.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Right. My assignment for you is you put on a fake beard and try and eat some stew with it on.

[Karen Kilgariff]

No, I'm like, wait, that's not a. Here's the thing. All you have to do is watch a movie.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Okay. Witness. And I wrote 1989.

[Amy Eric]

Why did.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I don't need that.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Was I right? No, it's 85, damn it, 85.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I'm changing it so I don't watch the wrong one. Yeah, I don't watch the one from 80.

[Karen Kilgariff]

89. Witnesses. So dirty.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Dude, that is like made for Cinemax.

[Karen Kilgariff]

But I had a lot of fun watching the drama and then being like, I'm going to make up an opinion about this and we're gonna discuss it on the fan call.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I'll do it. Hell yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Okay.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Great going to happen.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It's a deal.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I love assigning each other to watch assignments, sign each other assignments.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I was provided some information just to convince you more. Witness has 92% on rotten tomatoes.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Oh, then I'll watch it. Because you know how I live by the RT rating.

[Karen Kilgariff]

You will only.

[Georgia Hardstark]

That's all I ever talk about.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Is this RT approved? George is constantly saying, what did RT say about this? Cuz I got to check into my rt.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Speaking of rotten, we have a podcast network.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That's right.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Called exactly right. Media. Here are some highlights. Please listen to these other podcasts for us. Thank you.

[Karen Kilgariff]

We have roughly 16 incredible podcasts handpicked by us, chosen.

[Georgia Hardstark]

That's right.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And then performed by some of the greats in the biz.

[Georgia Hardstark]

That's right.

[Karen Kilgariff]

A series of hit podcasts can't be denied. For example, our most recent hit, Disgraceland with Jake Brennan. That's here on the network this week. Jake tells the classic true crime story behind Sonic Youth's Goo. It has one of the coolest album covers of all time and the shocking murders that inspired the artwork.

[Georgia Hardstark]

That is a rad story.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yep.

[Georgia Hardstark]

And then over on Ghosted, Roz celebrates Pride Month by featuring queer creators all June long, including this week's guest, the one and only Tammy Brown.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Doing it.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Epic.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Also, not to be gross, but this is a reminder to join the fan cult. You get access to all episodes of this podcast. My favorite murder ad free. You get merch store discounts on our merch. You get exclusive of video and audio content and so much more.

[Georgia Hardstark]

So stop complaining and go to fancult.supercast.com why am I yelling at them?

[Karen Kilgariff]

It's fun. We get to. We still get to.

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[Georgia Hardstark]

Yay.

[Ashley I]

Yay.

[Karen Kilgariff]

You're. You're off.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I'm off the hook.

[Karen Kilgariff]

You're on a three day weekend right now.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yes.

[Amy Eric]

Okay.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Karen's gonna do a solo.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It's my solo story. I saw a TikTok. Okay, I need a T shirt that said I saw TikTok.

[Georgia Hardstark]

You do?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Because it's all I say and kind of I do. But it's great because as we all know, we're getting into an era where experts are finally speaking and getting up on camera and getting on mic and being like, hey, you don't have to be, I don't know, Sydney Sweeney to get here and perform and speak publicly. It's not that big of a deal.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I thought you're gonna talk about peptides.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Oh, I will because I'm the expert on peptides.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Okay.

[Karen Kilgariff]

The copper peptides are what you want these days. Just found out about that. But it's basically like there's more and more people come forward to talk about stuff. So I find that on TikTok, I'm finding so many more people who are the source of the information. They're the researchers themselves, the authors themselves, the investigative journalists. Exactly. All those people that are now the ones telling the story, which I love.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

So I don't know if this person is any of those things, but they are the reason that I learned about this story I'm about to tell you, and they inspired me to want to tell the story as well.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Love it.

[Karen Kilgariff]

So it's a. From a woman named Mary Kate Teske.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Okay.

[Karen Kilgariff]

So that's her name on TikTok, if you wanna go follow her. This is how I first found out about this story.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Okay.

[Karen Kilgariff]

So if you are listening to this, the day this episode comes out, which is June 25, 2026. Hi. Your first day of Listener. I want you to know Today is the 150th anniversary of one of the most infamous battles in American history, the Battle of Little Bighorn, also known as Custer's Last Stand.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Okay.

[Karen Kilgariff]

On this day in 1876, Lieutenant Colonel G.E. armstrong Custer and his men were wiped out by Lakota, Northern Cheyenne and Arapaho warriors who are under the command of legendary Native leaders like Crazy Horse and Sitting Bull. Of course, the history lesson we got about this battle presents Custer as some kind of noble martyr to our expanding nation and completely ignores the Native American experience and perspective and version of the story. Yeah, but that changed around 2005, when Montana's tribal colleges began to spearhead a push to preserve the state's Native histories and storytelling. And so they gather a group of Northern Cheyenne storytellers in Billings, Montana, so that they can share their oral history of the Battle of Little Bighorn, which the Cheyenne and other Plains tribes actually called the Battle of the Greasy Grass. So for many people outside the Cheyenne community, they will be hearing for the first time that day the truth about what happened. And what those storytellers in Billings describe ends up capturing headlines across the country, because for the first time, we hear about the Cheyenne warrior responsible for Custer's death. So today, in honor of the 150th anniversary, I'm gonna tell you the story of that warrior. Her name is Buffalo Calf. Road Woman.

[Georgia Hardstark]

What?

[Karen Kilgariff]

That's right. Our sources for today's story are articles from the Independent Record and the Billings Gazette archives and the work of writers Rosemary And Joseph Agunido and the rest of the sources are in our show notes. Okay, so everything in this is gonna be very condensed and very like our version of things. Yeah, this is the Karen, Georgia Wikipedia version of things called My Favorite Murder. No offense, Marin McLachan, my brilliant researcher, but to tell stories like this is like, I will assume people know as little as I do about American history, about Native American history, about all these things that are really important that I just feel fully uneducated about.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Right, right.

[Karen Kilgariff]

So by the 1800s in America, the Cheyenne are a powerful nation spread across the Great Plains with a population in the thousands. They are a vibrant, horse centric culture with a highly organized military system. And while Cheyenne warrior culture is largely associated with men, gender norms are not cut and dried with this tribe. Authors Rosemary and Joseph Van Gnitto write about the Cheyenne. Quote, we have numerous accounts of women taking up weapons and risking their lives when attacked. Women were adept at using a variety of weapons, including the gun. End quote. So by the 1840s, what's going on in the United States is that we are aggressively expanding under the banner of Manifest Destiny, which is basically the belief that white Americans are ordained by God to spread across the North American continent and to take whatever they want, essentially.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Right.

[Karen Kilgariff]

So while the Cheyenne have long had to defend themselves against rival tribes, the defense is now needed to fight the encroachment of white settlers and the army. So as tensions ramp up, some Cheyenne leaders seek peace with the United States. At this point, the Cheyenne nation is broadly divided into Northern and Southern Cheyenne. So Buffalo Calf Road Woman is born into the Northern Cheyenne tribe in what is now Montana. Her birth year is believed to be 1844. But unfortunately, we have almost no personal details about Buffalo Calf Road Woman or her life, because Cheyenne oral history is heavily disrupted by forced assimilation onto reservations and into places like Native American boarding schools, which that story also needs to be told. And I have been trying to work out a story about that, Maren, and I have for literally years to get it told correctly, concisely. It's so expansive, it's so horrific. And it's colonization. It's basically, how do you tell the story of colonization in this country?

[Georgia Hardstark]

Totally.

[Karen Kilgariff]

So what we do know about the life of Buffalo Calf Road Woman is that her childhood is shaped by an ever escalating tension with these white pioneers in the US military. In 1851, when she's about seven years old, the Treaty of Fort Laramie is signed in Wyoming. So it formally recognizes a large stretch of the Great Plains. As belonging to seven different tribes that include the Cheyenne. But just a few years after that signing, in 1858, gold is discovered in the Rocky Mountains of Colorado. And so white miners flood the area in what's now remembered as the Pikes Peak Gold Rush. So even though this is supposed to be protected land, the United States does nothing to stop them. Then, in 1861, the betrayal multiplies when the US signs a new treaty that shrinks Cheyenne territory down to a 13th, roughly a 13th of its previous size, so that it can open more land to white settlement and mining operations. Many Cheyennes simply refuse to comply, continuing to hunt and live on land that is now suddenly declared off limits to them, even though they have lived there for literally thousands of years. Buffalo Calf Road woman is around 15 years old when all of this starts taking place. She's coming of age as this violence begins to intensify across the plains. And as writer Katherine S. Gardner puts it, quote, she never experienced the Cheyenne life of her elders. From birth until her death, her tribe and culture were continuously under threat of extermination. End quote. And it's kind of fascinating because she has. And it'll come up a little bit later, but she has a brother. And imagining the life of a young woman who absolutely had to know how to fight, absolutely had to be good at it. And in their culture, which is a militaristic culture, that was a big thing for the Cheyenne. I just can't imagine that she didn't absolutely go get right into the training and the fray and everything else. She's a teenager watching her people being massacred. So in stark contrast to Buffalo Calf Road Woman's story and the fact that we barely know anything about it, we know a lot about the early life of George Armstrong Custer. He was born In Ohio in 1839, just a few years before Buffalo Calf Road Woman was born. Custer is largely raised in Michigan. He develops an early knack for getting into trouble. He does very badly in school. He graduates last in his class at West Point in 1861. Last.

[Georgia Hardstark]

That's kind of impressive.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It's fucking nutso that he's one of the most famous, like, military entities of this time. And he was the worst student in his class in 1861. He had an unbelievable 726 demerits.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Jesus.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Which I guess is like, you're in trouble. Yeah, it happened that many times. But the Civil War starts the same year that he graduates, so the US army is desperate to fill ranks. And Custer quickly becomes an officer.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Wow.

[Karen Kilgariff]

But his Blatant disobedience is what helps him arguably rise so quickly through the ranks. He shoots up the chain of command while in his early 20s and becomes the subject of glowing Union newspaper coverage, earning him the nickname the Boy General. And some of that reputation is earned. Custer is known for charging straight into battle and relentlessly pushing his men while they're under fire. With he himself often riding in the front of the cavalry instead of the back. He is seemingly unfazed by the threat of death. Any of that sound familiar to a certain personality type that you've heard of over the years?

[Georgia Hardstark]

Narcissists?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Sociopath.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Sociopath, right. Yep.

[Karen Kilgariff]

He's just like, no rules apply to me.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I do what I want.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And, oh, it's something horribly dangerous. Let's all go over there.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Let's do it.

[Karen Kilgariff]

But he's also very smart and he's keenly aware of the power of self mythology. So his public image is very calculated. As Time magazine points out, quote, Custer ghost wrote newspaper dispatches in which he pretended to be a correspondent and inflated his own roles in battles and military exploits.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Wow.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah.

[Georgia Hardstark]

It's like he left comments in his own section being like, I love this.

[Karen Kilgariff]

He's so brave. What a great leader. He's also very flashy. He perfumes his flowing blonde hair with cinnamon oil and he wears a custom blue velveteen jacket and a wide brimmed hat and a bright red tie into battle. None of those are standard issue. That was whimsical, his costume. Custer clearly wants to stand out. It works. He's famous before the war is through. So meanwhile, the situation on the plains between the Cheyenne and the United States remains volatile. In November of 1864, these tensions boil over in a horrific way when an army colonel named John Chivington approaches a Cheyenne and Arapaho camp at Sand Creek in eastern Colorado, where there's about 700 people at this camp, and it's led by Southern Cheyenne chief Black Kettle, who's repeatedly sought peace with the United States. So this is one of those many tribal leaders of the native people who constantly were like, yeah, let's agree that, you know, let's do this. Let's divide up this land. There's plenty of it. We've been here a long time and every single time it'd be like, sure, sure, here's some pox filled blankets.

[Georgia Hardstark]

The massacre.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah, yeah. To the point where at this camp there's a white flag and an American flag flying. But Colorado's then governor, John Evans, does not seem to care. He wants the Cheyenne removed from this area. So Chivington and some 700 volunteer soldiers attack the camp and they kill around 150 people. Oh my God. And most of them are women and children. The survivors are traumatized by memories of their loved ones being mutilated in front of them. News of the massacre spreads quickly across the plains, provoking fury, despair, and the end of whatever hope was left that the US could be trusted by the Cheyenne and the Native people. And even some white Americans are outraged at the time. And Chivington ends up resigning in disgrace. Still, neither he nor any of his men are criminally prosecuted for the massacre at Sand Creek. Now it's 1865, the Confederacy has been defeated, the Civil War comes to an end. So a now 25 years year old Custer is sent to the frontier. He swaps his blue velvetine for buckskins, which again are not standard issue. So he's got his new costume, his new personality, and his next assignment is to help force the plains tribes onto U.S. designated reservations. These are very difficult campaigns for the United States. They are usually very much outmatched by the native warriors. Meanwhile, in 1867, Custer ditches his post to visit his wife in Kansas, which results in a court martial, his suspension from rank and the loss of his paycheck for a year. Despite his insubordination though, the US army is convinced that they need someone as aggressive as Custer to fight against these resisting Plains tribes. So less than a year after being court martialed, he's reinstated and the newspapers refer to it as, quote, Custer's luck. The system is beyond rigged, right? So the next year in 1868, the now 29 year old Custer is brought to Black Kettle's village, now sitting on the Washita, modern Oklahoma. Four years after the Sand Creek massacre, Black Kettle is still trying to broker peace with the United States. But the US military increasingly classifies any native communities living outside the reservations to be, quote, hostile adversaries. So Custer's men carry out another brutal attack. They kill dozens of native people, including Black Kettle himself. They kill the chief, hundreds of horses are slaughtered and lodges are burned to the ground. So news of these attacks again spread rapidly across the plains and again even among white settlers. The brutality and violence of this attack instantly makes Custer a controversial leader, but it also cements him as one of the United States most well known, so called, quote unquote Indian fighters. Around the same time, in 1868, a second treaty of Fort Laramie is signed. The treaties have the same name because they're signed at Fort Laramie at both times. But this treaty establishes the Great Sioux Reservation and recognizes the Black Hills in the Dakota Territory as belonging to the Lakota. But the same situation plays out here like it did before. In 1874, gold is discovered in the Black Hills. White miners come flooding in. The US army, for its part, sends Custer to investigate the reports of gold. He confirms them and then that leads the US Government to try to purchase the Black Hills back from the Lakota. Can imagine the Lakota say no, which begins to fuel tensions with the US but then strengthens resistance among the Plains tribes. So it's the Lakota, the Arapaho, and the Cheyenne. So the US seizes the Black Hills from the Lakota in 1877. And just FYI, a century later, in 1980, the Supreme Court rules this seizure was unjust and they awarded the Sioux Nation monetary compensation. But the Sioux Nation refused to take the money, insisting they just want the land back.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Wow.

[Karen Kilgariff]

The fight to return this land continues to this day. It's believed that land is now worth more than a billion dollars.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Jesus.

[Karen Kilgariff]

By 1876, the conflict between the United States army and a coalition of Northern Cheyenne, Arapaho and Lakota warriors has boiled over the Great Sioux War. Buffalo Calf Road Woman is now in her early 30s, and she's living in the Rosebud Valley of Montana, along Rosebud Creek with Lakota and Arapaho allies. And here In June of 1876, a US general named George Crook arrives outside of her camp with 1300 of his men. And the Native Coalition fights them in a battle that lasts several hours. According to tribal oral tradition, Buffalo Calf Road Woman's brother, a warrior named Comes In Sight, is among the thousands of Native men who charge the U.S. soldiers. But during the fighting, Comes In Sight is knocked off his horse and he gets trapped under fire. So essentially in these battles, if you get knocked off your horse, it's basically you're dead. Cause someone just comes by and shoots you. So he's on the ground, his death is all but ensured until his sister, Buffalo Calf Road Woman, jumps onto her horse and charges directly into battle. She rides so fast, no bullets can strike her. And per the oral account, she pulls her brother up onto her horse and she gets him to safety.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Jesus.

[Karen Kilgariff]

In the middle of a full on war. In the end, the Native Coalition forces the US Troops to retreat. Today, United States history remembers this event as the Battle of the Rosebud. But the Cheyenne remember it as the fight where the girl saved her brother.

[Ashley I]

Wow.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Buffalo Calf Road Woman is believed to be the only female warrior who rides into this battle.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Jeez.

[Karen Kilgariff]

So this Native victory is extremely important because just eight days later, Custer arrives at another encampment belonging to the same native coalition. But this time they're in the Little Bighorn Valley in southeastern Montana. And this time, crucially, Custer does not have the amount of troops like reinforcements that General Crook had. They have all retreated after the loss at the Battle of the Rosebud, at the fight where the girl saved her brother. But on top of that, Custer badly underestimates the size of the coalition that he is about to attack and probably the talent of it, right? So on June 25, 1876, Custer and around 600 soldiers arrive near the Little Bighorn encampment. His forces are split into several battalions intended to attack the camp from different directions. Custer himself heads north with about 200 men. But what they don't know is that word of this impending attack is spreading quickly among the tribes. They know it. They have lookouts. They know how to use this land and protect their camps. And so immediately, they know that it's happening. And thousands of warriors rise up and ride into battle, many of the same who had just fought the Battle of the Rosebud days earlier. The Battle of Little Bighorn is hard, fast, and totally chaotic. One US Battalion attacks, only to immediately retreat after realizing how incredibly outnumbered. Then a second battalion retreats. And so Castro looks around, all his men are leaving, but he makes himself and his 200 men push forward anyway, and they're completely overwhelmed. In less than an hour, every single soldier riding with Custer is killed, including Custer himself.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Holy shit.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And because there's no survivors who can report back to the army officially what happened or to newspaper reporters, the historical record around Custer's last moments are very murky, which, of course, then sets the stage for the folk hero treatment that he ends up getting. What we do know is that Custer's body is found among dozens of his men with two bullet wounds. One is in his heart, and the other's in his head. It's not until 2005 in Billings, Montana, when those Northern Cheyenne storytellers finally share their oral history of Little Bighorn, that we learn what really happened. They say that Colonel Custer was shot to death on the ground because he got knocked off his horse by a warrior's club. And that day, they reveal that the same woman who saved her brother from certain death in the battle days before is the one who knocked Custer off his horse. It's Buffalo Calf Road Woman.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Oh, my God.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And the oral accounts describe her as being, quote, out in the open during this intense battle. It wasn't like she was off to the side or whatever. She was in the fray. And they also confirmed that, quote, she stayed on her horse the entire time.

[Amy Eric]

Wow.

[Karen Kilgariff]

So the Battle of Little Bighorn is arguably the most famous native victory of the Plains wars and one of the most infamous defeats in the US Army's history. The Northern Cheyenne say that's the reason they kept the story of Buffalo Calf Road Woman a secret for so long. They were afraid that when the army heard that a Cheyenne woman is basically the one who got cussed or killed, it would result in even harsher assaults by the army on their tribes.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Retaliation, yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

The US still seeks retribution for the defeat. And Buffalo Calf Road Woman, like many Cheyenne, remain under constant pressure from the military to submit to US authority or be killed. In 1877, she and her family will be forced onto an Oklahoma reservation. She spends about a year there, enduring brutal living conditions. And it's believed there she gives birth to her second child. Not long after, in 1878, she and her family join what's known as the Northern Cheyenne Exodus, which was a desperate, defiant, and ultimately successful push led by the Northern Cheyenne chiefs Morningstar and Little Wolf, to leave the reservation and return to its Montana homeland. So Buffalo Calf Road Woman is One of the 300 women, men and children who escape the Oklahoma reservation. They set out on a dangerous, exhausting journey spanning hundreds of miles. Along the way, members of the group are captured by American troops or they're killed in skirmishes. Others die of exhaustion or of illness. And Buffalo Calf Road Woman is among those. She dies in 1879, in her mid-30s, likely of diphtheria. We're not sure. She's believed to be buried somewhere near present day Miles City, Montana, but her grave has never been identified. It's unclear how many members of this group ultimately made it to Montana. Sources suggest it's less than half the original number, so around 150 people. But this exodus puts enough political pressure on the US Government that the Northern Cheyenne who do make it to Montana are not forced back to Oklahoma. This is how the Northern Cheyenne Indian Reservation in southeastern Montana is established in 1884. And, of course, in death, General Custer and Buffalo Calf Road Woman could not have been treated more differently. Custer is the subject of countless history books, biographies, paintings, photographs. Yet there isn't a single confirmed portrait of Buffalo Calf Red Woman to be found. And most of the images that you see online of her use either misidentified photos of Other Native women or slop AI. Where it's just slop AI. So, in February 2026, the Trump administration issues an executive order calling for a review of signs and exhibits at national parks and monuments that could be seen as critical of the US Government. That includes signage at the site of the Battle of Little Bighorn. The Washington Post reported earlier this year that, quote, at Little Bighorn Battlefield National Monument in Montana, exhibit text that described the United States being, quote, hungry for golden land and breaking promises to Native Americans was ordered changed or removed.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Just fucking rewrite history, why don't you?

[Karen Kilgariff]

And erase it. Yeah, worked before. Another text describing how US run boarding schools for indigenous children violently erased cultural identities and language was also deemed not to comply with Trump's policy.

[Georgia Hardstark]

The facts don't comply with your policies. Something was wrong with their fucking policy. Okay.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It's not an option. No, it's not a choice. To say it didn't happen.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Well, not for fucking people who aren't psychotic.

[Karen Kilgariff]

So the Northern Cheyenne leadership is actively opposing this administration's efforts. Tribal leaders issued a press release this past February saying, quote, this attempt to change or remove tribal markers and monuments dims the light of the healing and progress we have all made. End quote. Which is a very generous thing to say in the light of Native American progress.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Right.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And how little any government has ever given them or made for them.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah. And you're trying to take that away,

[Karen Kilgariff]

but that goes, too. While there's never been a monument for Buffalo Calf Road Woman, she has always been memorialized by her people, who have carried the story of her courage, her strength, and her valor in two bloody battles for more than a century. When telling Buffalo Calf Road Woman's story, a Northern Cheyenne saying is often shared, and it says, quote, a nation is not conquered until the hearts of its women are on the ground. Then it is done. No matter how brave its warriors or how strong its weapons, Buffalo Calf Road Woman's heart was never on the ground. She stayed on her horse the whole time. And that's what we're gonna do.

[Ashley I]

Hell, yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And that's what we're gonna do.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Tonight we ride.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Tonight we ride. And that's the story of the Cheyenne warrior, the one who defeated Custer. Buffalo Calf Road Woman.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Wow. I wish we could have the actual, like, historical story, because I bet it's even more badass and there's even more fucking incredible things she did that like, and other women and, like, her tribe that we just don't know about.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And in thinking about that, how many stories have been lost of people just like her because of the annihilation of the genocide of the Native American people in this country. It is a gigantic tragedy, the effects of which continue to this day.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah. Yeah. Well, great job. I had never heard that. I'm so glad I did.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Right. Me too. I wish we could know more. Do you want to make a donation?

[Georgia Hardstark]

Definitely.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Let's donate to the Native American Rights Fund. Here's their quote about themselves. They hold governments accountable. They fight to protect Native American rights resources and lifeways through litigation, legal advocacy and legal expertise.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Hell yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

So we'll give them $10,000. If you want to donate to the Native American Rights fund, go to narf.org and give them what you can give them.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Amazing. Well, great job.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Thank you.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Excellent solo episode.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Thank you. Right.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah.

[Ashley I]

This is Ashley I from the Almost Famous podcast. Can I be honest for a second? Some mornings I look in the mirror and I think, why do I look good? This tired puffiness around the eyes. Dullness. Because sometimes stress starts showing up on your face before you even realize it. And that's why I've been loving this holistic goddess organic castor oil roll on with frankincense. No crazy chemicals, no expensive treatments. It's just organic castor oil, frankincense and this rose quartz roller that feels so good on tired stressed skin. I look for anything that can depuff me and this really did my under eye eyes look brighter. My face looked way more refreshed. It's almost like my face just exhaled. So try the holistic goddess organic castor oil roll on with frankincense yourself. Use my promo code [e-mail] Ashley for 15 off promo code [e-mail] ashley this

[Bethenny Frankel]

is Bethany Frankel from Just be with Bethany Frankel. Biggie and Smalls are my little soul mates and I love them in that ridiculous way only pet people understand that. I am so excited to try Chewy. They have over 100,000 products. All the food, treats, toys, supplements my boys could ever need. Everything ships fast, which is huge. Chewy also handles the serious stuff. Prescriptions, pet insurance, telehealth, vet visits. And they're even opening vet clinics across the country. Brilliant. And their 247 customer service feels like talking to people who truly get it. The kind of people who understand why you would buy insane dog costumes and not get judged by for it. Plus the one year satisfaction guarantee means if my boys turn their noses up at something, I can return it with no stress. So excited for how Chewy helps me take care of Biggie and Smalls so I can focus on loving them the way I do for life with pets. The answer is chewy. Save $20 on your first order with free shipping at chewpanions.chewy.com JustBee.

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[Georgia Hardstark]

Let's do another batch of honking hoorays brought to you by Hyundai.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Thanks Hyundai.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Thanks Hyundai.

[Karen Kilgariff]

This one, it's from Brittany A. And she wrote in the Fan Cult. It says, My 97 year old cowboy grandpa and long standing conservative Mormon aunt told me they didn't vote for the current administration because of my wife and myself. We are married females of 10 years. And then in parentheses it says that's a hooray all on its own. They understand that their vote would go against my marriage and they didn't want any part of that. Hearing this made me feel cared for and heard for the first time ever on this side of the family. Keep having the hard conversations because sometimes they'll listen and it's Pride Month. Oh my God. But Things can happen.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I'm gonna cry.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I know.

[Georgia Hardstark]

It's so beautiful. Okay, this one is from Sierra Boonenberger. Don't know what that is.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That's an online name on Instagram.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Today I actually got off work early enough to make happy hour at our local wine bar.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Oh.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Hashtag tgif.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I hope she went to tgif.

[Georgia Hardstark]

That's her local wine.

[Karen Kilgariff]

She gets the best wine at tgif.

[Georgia Hardstark]

They have a Josh Sellers.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It's all yellow. Top to tail yellow. I get four cubes of ice and a shot of Dr. Pepper. Well, I mean, like happy hour happy hour is.

[Georgia Hardstark]

There's nothing like it.

[Amy Eric]

What a reward.

[Georgia Hardstark]

If you're at happy hour. Your life is going well.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah. And don't forget, you don't have to drink at happy hour. You can eat their weird hors d'. Oeuvres.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Totally. Get those happy hour sliders.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Get in there. Very similar, but on the other end of the spectrum. This is from Eat, Shoots and Travels over on Instagram. And they say I paid off my mortgage.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Oh, my God.

[Karen Kilgariff]

At 43 by myself, I'm not rich. I just saved really hard literal tears at the bank. God, I love that. Can you imagine? You're just like standing in the bank like it doesn't matter to you.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Totally.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I don't know what this is, but I am absolutely getting myself to a brand new place.

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Yeah.

[Georgia Hardstark]

This is a life changing experience. And I'm gonna cry in front of strange.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah, you better cry at 43 food.

[Amy Eric]

Incredible.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Okay. This is from Taylor on our email. My hooray is that my friend and I signed up for water aerobics.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yes.

[Georgia Hardstark]

As 32 year olds. Yes. And we love it. I love the water. And was frustrated by the lack of swimming in adulthood. That's so true. Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

There's not enough.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I dive in every class and the older ladies are always shocked and slightly offended. But they're sweet and have added me to their swim sisters email chain.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Oh, my God. So much shit is talked on that email chain.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Betty, you're not gonna believe that.

[Karen Kilgariff]

You should have seen the way she looked in her three piece suit.

[Georgia Hardstark]

We talk about books. We were nervous to go her friend and her. But it's now a big highlight of my week and actually a decent no impact workout.

[Ashley I]

Yes.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It's water hell.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah. Plus I had an excuse to buy bright yellow shower sandals with carrots and bunnies on them in Chinatown.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That is such a good pastime. Kind of like way to fill your time.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Cause it's very social.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Mm.

[Karen Kilgariff]

You know Shoulders and head above water almost the whole time.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Hair's not gonna get fucked up.

[Karen Kilgariff]

You can chat, chat, chat.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I really love an alt workout routine is my favorite thing. Yeah, I'm not gonna do it right. I love knowing about them.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I'm not gonna do any of it. But I love a pool. Love a pool, love a pool. This is a fasty because it's Megan writing in from Fan Cult and saying, this morning I flipped the eggs without bursting the yolks. I finally found the perfect oil to heat ratio.

[Georgia Hardstark]

They're not gonna tell us like this.

[Karen Kilgariff]

No, no. Totally gatekeeping that. But just letting the world know that Megan T. Had her egg victory this morning. Congratulations.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Congratulations. I've never done it. Well, thank you to Hyundai for presenting these honking arrays and thank you guys for writing them in. Please write them in more and we'll read them. That's right.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And also, stay sexy.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Don't get murdered.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Goodbye, Elvis.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Do you want.

[Karen Kilgariff]

This has been an exactly right production.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Our senior producer is Molly Smith and our associate producer is Tessa Hughes.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Our editor is Aristotle Acevedo.

[Georgia Hardstark]

This episode was mixed by Liana Squalacci.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Our researchers are Maren McGlashan and Ali Elkin.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Email your hometowns to my favorite murdermail.com

[Karen Kilgariff]

and follow the show on Instagram at My favorite murder.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Listen to my favorite murder on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And now you can watch my favorite murder on Netflix.

[Georgia Hardstark]

And when you're there, hit the double thumbs up and the remind me buttons. That's the best way you can support our show. Goodbye.

[Bethenny Frankel]

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[Cal Penn]

Huge.

[Bethenny Frankel]

Chewy also handles the serious stuff. Prescriptions, pet insurance, telehealth, vet visits, and they're even opening vet clinics across the country. Brilliant. And their 247 customer service feels like talking to people who truly get it. The kind of people who understand why you would buy insane dog costumes and not get judged for it. Plus, the one year satisfaction guarantee means if my boys turn their noses up at something, I can return it with no stress. So excited for how Chewy helps me take care of Biggie and Smart so I can focus on loving them the way I do for life with pets. The answer is chewy. Save $20 on your first order with free shipping at chewpanions.chewy.com JustBee hello, beautiful.

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[Coldwater Creek Advertiser]

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[Cal Penn]

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