MFM Minisode 413

Summary

My Favorite Murder with Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark Episode: MFM Minisode 413 Release Date: December 9, 2024

Hosted by Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark

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Introduction

In MFM Minisode 413, Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark delve into a series of heartfelt and intriguing listener stories, offering a blend of true crime fascination and personal anecdotes. This episode, released on December 9, 2024, showcases the hosts' ability to intertwine compelling narratives with their signature humor and empathy, making it accessible and engaging for both longtime fans and newcomers.

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1. Tunnel or No Tunnel: A Family Legend Timestamp: [02:45] – [05:12]

Karen opens the minisode by reading an email titled "Tunnel or No Tunnel," shared by a listener who recounts a captivating family story. The narrative transports us to Cornwall, Ontario, where Karen's great-grandfather owned a hotel with rumored bootlegging activities during Prohibition. The listener reminisces about childhood fantasies of discovering a secret tunnel beneath the hotel, only to learn later from a cousin that the supposed tunnel led to the furnace room, not to hidden treasures.

Notable Quote:

[04:18] Karen Kilgariff: "He would then stop at the bank to visit the manager. While there he would use a tunnel under the street to take the bottles to his hotel."

This story not only highlights the allure of family legends but also underscores the impact of youthful imagination on our perception of our heritage.

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2. Fire Stories: Childhood Chaos and Close Calls Timestamp: [05:12] – [10:02]

The episode transitions into a segment aptly titled "Fire Stories," where Karen shares a tumultuous childhood memory. During the 1960s, Karen's father, a sensitive yet feisty child, confronts his Uncle Mark over a stolen doll, resulting in a minor injury with a nail file. The situation escalates when Karen's father inadvertently almost causes a house fire while searching for the hidden toy under the bed, a direct consequence of the babysitter allowing children to play with candles.

Notable Quote:

[07:55] Maddie: "With a nail file. That's a tetanus shot right there."

Karen and Maddie humorously dissect the plausibility of the story, adding layers of comedic relief to the otherwise intense recollection. This segment not only entertains but also sheds light on family dynamics and the sometimes perilous creativity of children.

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3. Forgotten Snacks and 80s Parenting: A Sugar-Fueled Upbringing Timestamp: [12:38] – [22:54]

Maddie takes center stage with a nostalgic dive into 1980s parenting practices, emphasizing the overindulgence of sugary treats as rewards. She narrates her and her brother's chaotic grocery store escapades, complete with playing tag through aisles and the constant temptation of their mother's stash of candy. The listener vividly describes chugging thick, sugary fruit punch concentrate as a "treat drink," highlighting the cultural norms of the era.

Notable Quote:

[14:22] Maddie: "Oh, my God. She'd get us a drink."

Karen and Maddie reflect on these memories with a mix of humor and mild exasperation, offering a relatable glimpse into the challenges of parenting and the lasting impact of childhood experiences.

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4. Witness Protection Wonders: Moving Into Mystery Timestamp: [16:58] – [19:12]

The narrative shifts to a more mysterious tale as Maddie recounts moving into a new home in Arizona, only to discover remnants of the previous occupants’ hurried departure. Items like gory religious brochures, animal bones in jars, and disconnected safety deposit box keys raise suspicions. Upon investigating, it becomes evident that the family was in witness protection due to the father's role as a drug informant. This revelation explains the sudden police presence and the lack of communication from the original real estate agent.

Notable Quote:

[18:10] Maddie: "Vampire witness protection program that's coming this fall. Oh my God."

Karen and Maddie playfully reference the improbability of the situation, intertwining true crime elements with a touch of humor, making the story both intriguing and lighthearted.

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5. Tribute to Mr. Truax: A Heartwarming Memory Timestamp: [23:36] – [28:48]

In a poignant conclusion to the minisode, Maddie shares a heartfelt tribute to Mr. Truax, an unforgettable environmental science teacher who profoundly influenced her life. Karen listens as Maddie describes their shared history, including the creation of a "salsa club" and Mr. Truax’s enduring legacy through projects aimed at reducing food waste. The tribute culminates with a touching acknowledgment of Mr. Truax’s continued inspiration, especially on his birthday, blending personal gratitude with the community's sorrow over his untimely passing.

Notable Quote:

[25:34] Karen Kilgariff: "I'd love to say that I knew that it was his birthday, but I had no clue."

This segment beautifully encapsulates the episode's theme of memory and legacy, leaving listeners with a warm sense of connection and appreciation for the mentors who shape our lives.

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Conclusion

MFM Minisode 413 masterfully balances humor, nostalgia, and heartfelt storytelling. Karen and Maddie navigate through varied narratives—from family legends and childhood mayhem to mysterious relocations and heartfelt tributes—with grace and wit. Notable quotes punctuate the stories, providing memorable highlights that resonate long after the episode ends. For those who haven't listened, this minisode offers a rich tapestry of personal experiences intertwined with true crime elements, staying true to the essence of My Favorite Murder while expanding its narrative horizons.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• [04:18] Karen Kilgariff: "He would then stop at the bank to visit the manager. While there he would use a tunnel under the street to take the bottles to his hotel."
• [07:55] Maddie: "With a nail file. That's a tetanus shot right there."
• [14:22] Maddie: "Oh, my God. She'd get us a drink."
• [18:10] Maddie: "Vampire witness protection program that's coming this fall. Oh my God."
• [25:34] Karen Kilgariff: "I'd love to say that I knew that it was his birthday, but I had no clue."

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Final Thoughts

MFM Minisode 413 exemplifies the unique charm of My Favorite Murder, blending true crime with personal storytelling. The hosts' ability to engage with listener submissions and personal anecdotes ensures that each episode remains fresh and relatable. Whether you're a dedicated fan or new to the podcast, this minisode offers a compelling listen filled with laughs, memories, and meaningful reflections.

Transcript

[Karen Kilgariff]

This is exactly right.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Did you know that parents rank financial literacy as the number one most difficult life skill to teach? Meet Greenlight, the debit card and money app for families. With Greenlight, you can send money to kids instantly, set up chores, automate allowance, and keep an eye on your kids spending. With real time notifications, kids learn to earn, save, and spend wisely. And parents can rest easy knowing their kids are learning about money with guardrails in place. Sign up for Greenlight [e-mail] Spotify Listen up.

[Liza Trager]

I'm Liza Trager.

[Kara Klenk]

And I'm Kara Klenk. And we're the hosts of the true crime comedy podcast that's Messed up, an SVU podcast.

[Liza Trager]

Every Tuesday, we break down an episode of Law and Order svu, the true crime it's based on, and we chat with an actor from the episode.

[Kara Klenk]

Over the past few years, we've chatted with series icons like BD Wong, Kelly Giddish, Danny Pino, and guest stars like Padet Brewster and Matthew Lillard.

[Liza Trager]

And just like an SVU marathon, you can jump in anywhere.

[Kara Klenk]

Don't miss new episodes every Tuesday. Follow that's Messed up and SVU Podcast wherever you get your podcasts done.

[Maddie]

Hello, and welcome to my favorite Murder.

[Karen Kilgariff]

The Minisode, where we read you your stories. Did you hear that intro?

[Maddie]

Smooth as fucking butter.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Never in nine years have we had an intro where we knew our lines. Like that one.

[Maddie]

Smooth as silk and butter. Silky butter.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Silky butter is probably my favorite outfit in the summertime. Oh, yeah, and just smear it all over. Sorry, that was on me. That one's on me. I apologize.

[Maddie]

Okay, you go first.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Subject line of this email is tunnel or no tunnel. Hey, love. Oh, sorry. Hey, love, you too. Sorry. Oh, my God. My aunt Carol is not writing in right now.

[Maddie]

Hey, love.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Hey, love you too. Awesomenesses. I miss Elvis.

[Maddie]

Aw.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I often think of the story about the little girl in the backseat asking why she gave the goat a cookie.

[Maddie]

I think about that too.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Then it's a new paragraph.

[Maddie]

Okay.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Alejandra has the best name. I've never heard it before.

[Maddie]

Interesting.

[Karen Kilgariff]

New paragraph.

[Maddie]

Okay.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I listen every night before going to sleep. For some reason, my husband thinks this is weird and wonders if I am studying. We do have good life insurance. And then new paragraph. You want family treasure stories? Yes, we do.

[Maddie]

This is all over the middle.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It's just like we're in the brain with them and we're happy to be there. I grew up in Cornwall, Ontario. My great grandfather was a builder, hotel owner and rumored to Be a bootlegger. When we were little, my Mamaire and Papaire lived next to the hotel that my grandfather ran. Their names were Germaine and Romeo. Aren't those great? Gorgeous.

[Maddie]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

So good. Germaine. After mass on Sundays and then parentheses. Good French Catholics. We would all go have lunch at their house. It's a large family. There were eight kids and all have their own kids. Only about 40 people for lunch. Mal Mer was the best. Most of my cousins were born within a 10 year Spanish. We had so much fun together. The Christmas parties and New Year's parties were in the hotel and epic. When the pill came out, Mamaire told her daughters they should be good Catholics and not take it. They should abstain like she did. Question mark. Question mark. She had nine pregnancies. Yes, we know. We get. Okay. The hotel was closed on Sundays. And then in Parentheses it says 1970s. My 20 odd cousins and I had the run of the place. We would look for dropped money in the bar and often play in the basement. In the basement there used be a bowling alley. At the end there was a long dark hallway and my cousin told me that it went to the bank my great grandfather had built across the street. We were not allowed down there. I used to fantasize about going through that tunnel to get all the money I wanted. Treasure. Later my cousin told me that it wasn't true and that it really led to the furnace room. He crushed my dreams. Many years later, I ran across an article about my great grandfather who had been rumored to be a bootlegger during prohibition. It talked about him going down to the boats with the baby carriage with my grandfather in it and bringing the bottles back under the carriage.

[Maddie]

Smart.

[Karen Kilgariff]

He would then stop at the bank to visit the manager. While there he would use a tunnel under the street to take the bottles to his hotel. My cousin lied about lying. I guess I could have gone in to get that money. Never believe older cousins, Michelle.

[Maddie]

Wow. Lying about lying.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I mean that. I feel like truly that email gave all of us everything we could have ever wanted.

[Maddie]

Yeah, definitely. It was like hinged enough to not be unhinged, but hang it same time.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Just hanging off that last hinge by a hinge.

[Maddie]

Okay, this is called Fire stories. You say lighthearted, but a close one. Hello, MFM fam. Writing to you all again because this story truly has it all. Childhood trauma, deadbeat 60s babysitters and even a murder attempt. Plus in the Minnesota I'm currently listening to, you asked for fire stories and God damn it, this is one of those too.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yes.

[Maddie]

My dad is the youngest of four children and therefore the subject of torment most of his childhood. Of the three siblings, one in particular, Uncle Mark, was the worst offender to not only my dad, but his little sister as well. One night my grandparents had gone out to dinner and a sitter was at the house with the kids. It was around Halloween and It was the 60s, which is really all you need to know. The babysitter chose to put on a light hearted, suitable for all ages movie Psycho.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Oh no. And that's. Sorry, that's psycho in the 60s when they hadn't had a lot of like horror exposure, I would think.

[Maddie]

Totally. But how did he put it on? If it's. They don't have VCRs.

[Karen Kilgariff]

A huge reel to reel game.

[Maddie]

Hold on, hang on. I'm having a fucking crisis at the moment.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I think you just seized. You just discovered a gigantic lie.

[Maddie]

I just found a hole in this story and I'm not. What did he put it on? He didn't have anything to put it on. There's nothing to put on and there's nothing to put it on it.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I mean. Yeah, the only thing. Let's pretend it was the 80s reel to real.

[Maddie]

Let's pretend it was the 80s.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I don't know.

[Maddie]

Cause it couldn't be the 60s. I'm not going for. I'm gonna say 80s and I'm gonna correct this person.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Okay, yeah, yeah, I get it.

[Maddie]

Cut to after the movie and my dad and siblings are playing when my uncle Mark decides to steal his sister's doll, causing my aunt to be incredibly upset. My dad, being the sensitive while also incredibly over this BS 4 year old he is, decides to do something about it. Rummaging around my grandmother's vanity, he finds a nail file, not a soft emery board mind you, but the old school metal kind with a pointy top. And takes off.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah.

[Maddie]

My dad runs at my uncle, the nail file firmly in his chubby little hand held above his head, yelling, I'm going to stag you. And it says not a typo. He was so young he couldn't even pronounce the letter or B yet. Oh, stag you. So cute.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah.

[Maddie]

My uncle turned and raised his hand to protect his face, only to be met with a metal spike being driven right into the middle of his palm. Okay, get ready for this part. So far, the skin was tenting on the other side. All the way through. All the way through.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Okay.

[Maddie]

With a nail file. That's a tetanus shot right there.

[Karen Kilgariff]

The phrase the skin Was tenting. I never want to hear again in my life.

[Maddie]

It's too good. It's like too good a description.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And also, they're little kids.

[Maddie]

Yeah. Little baby ham.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Jesus Christ.

[Maddie]

To this day, my dad maintains that he deserves it, and my uncle honestly agrees. I would like to say he learned his lesson, but just months later, my dad almost burned down the house while looking for yet another toy my uncle had stolen and hid under the bed. How would looking under the bed cause a fire, you ask? The babysitter was letting them play with candles naturally. So he's like peeking under the bed, like with. Instead of a flashlight with a candle.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Cause I was imagining like, those big fat ones my mom would put in the middle of the table for like Christmas or whatever. But it's like she's letting them play, like, old fashioned, old, like, looky loo candle. What babysitter is this?

[Maddie]

Well, yeah, exactly. After the netting under the bed went up in flames, like the most flammable fucking thing in the house is your.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah.

[Maddie]

My dad quietly went downstairs and told everyone, quote, don't go upstairs.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah.

[Maddie]

Luckily, the fire department was called and the flames were put out quickly. Miraculously, only the bed suffered any damage. But my grandparents did have to come home early from dinner to find a charred mattress in their front lawn. Anyway, I love you all so much. Thank you for bringing me so much joy throughout the years. There's nothing like lovingly strolling around your baby to stories of horrific murders to really put a pep in your step.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah.

[Maddie]

Stay sexy and maybe find a new babysitter. Maddie.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I mean, for real, that's like step one at least. Also, maybe find new kids, because those kids were a disaster area.

[Maddie]

Also, that was the 80s and we're fucking sticking.

[Karen Kilgariff]

You insist. The holiday season's busy for everyone, even criminals.

[Maddie]

Whether it's package thieves targeting your doorstep or burglars looking for empty houses, crime spikes during the holidays this year.

[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Maddie]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Maddie]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

Simplisafe agents can spot suspicious activity in real time, set off your spotlights, and even call the police before a break in happens.

[Maddie]

There are no long term contracts, no cancellation fees, and it's around $1 a day for all this protection. If you don't even have a little like basic security on your house, like, what are you even doing right now? To me, the piece mine that I get from having home security is so huge, I can't believe I ever lived without it. And in today's technological world, it's all on your phone. You can check your house, you can make sure everything's okay, and you have Simplisafe backing you up on that. And to me, that's like priceless.

[Karen Kilgariff]

SimpliSafe is extending its massive Black Friday deal for our listeners this week only.

[Maddie]

You can get 50% off any new system with the Select Professional monitoring plan.

[Karen Kilgariff]

This is your last chance to claim their best offer of the year.

[Maddie]

Head to simplisafe.com fave that's SimpliSafe. There's no safe like SimpliSafe. Goodbye. Let's be real. Nothing beats seeing your favorite faces during the holidays.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And with the gift of Aura Frames, you can see your loved ones, even if they're far away.

[Maddie]

Aura Frames allows users to curate and share their photos and memories with loved ones, making it a personal and meaningful gift.

[Karen Kilgariff]

These frames are ranked as the number one digital picture frame by Wirecutter and here's why. They are incredibly easy to set up, update and enjoy.

[Maddie]

Aura Frames features a high resolution display showcasing photos in vivid detail.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Users can also update their frames from anywhere using the Aura app, making it convenient to add new memories.

[Maddie]

Plus, you can preload them with photos and a gift message, making it personal right out of the box.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Oh, we love Aura Frame so much. What a gift. It's the gift for the person that you have no idea. Sometimes you have to buy gifts for people you don't know very well, but you need to give them something nice. You need to show that like, even though, hey, you're kind of an acquaintance, but I still very much care about you. Ora Frames nails it because everybody wants to see the pictures on their phone somewhere else without having to go through the pain of like uploading and printing and all the different things. Aura Frames is like, we got that. We're going to turn it into a slideshow in your living room.

[Maddie]

It's so classy. Your new in laws are going to love it. Trust us. Save on the perfect gift by visiting auraframes.com to get $35 off Aura's best selling Carver Matte frames by using promo code MFM at checkout.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That's, that's a U R A frames.com promo code MFM.

[Maddie]

This deal is exclusive to listeners, so get yours now in time for the holidays.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Terms and conditions apply. Goodbye. Goodbye. The subject line of this is forgotten snacks and 80s parenting. Under two minutes. Not the way I'm about to read it. You asked for forgotten snacks in Minisode 400, and I immediately thought of a drink my brother and I would get when we went to the grocery store with my mom. Now that I have kids of my own and look back over those grocery store trips, I realize how insane my brother and I were to shop. Even for the mid-80s, we must have ruffled the feathers of fellow shoppers. We ran around the store at full speed, playing tag through Food Lion. Isn't that the best grocery store name?

[Maddie]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Food Lion.

[Maddie]

Food Lion.

[Karen Kilgariff]

The grocery store was a great place to play tag with those long aisles. My strategy was to stay on the opposite side of the store, and when he would spot me through an aisle, he'd run down it, giving me plenty of time to find a route to the opposite side again, occasionally. Mom, that's hilarious. They use the entire store.

[Maddie]

Oh, my God. I'm just. Can I just say that this is not on you kids? Your parents should have been fucking teaching you not to run around grocery stores.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Do you understand the level of trouble I would have been in to even be, like, picked up the pace or raising my voice like, oh, my God.

[Maddie]

Yeah, you would have hold onto the cart and walk next to it and don't ask for anything.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yes.

[Maddie]

That's like it.

[Karen Kilgariff]

The answer's no. The whole speech in the car of like, do not. I am tired now. We're not doing this right. We wore her down, though. Later on.

[Maddie]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Later on. The answer was yes. Occasionally, my mom would yell, walk, which meant you just had to make your arms look straight while you ran.

[Maddie]

I know that one.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That's right. Anyway, back to the drink. If we were good, in parentheses, which must have meant we left her alone and didn't knock anyone down.

[Maddie]

Oh, my God.

[Karen Kilgariff]

She'd get us a drink. Our choice of fruit punch or lemonade. Food lion store brand.

[Maddie]

Yes.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It came in square paper cartons, the ones you tear and make a little spout. We chugged that shit before we got back to the car. It was so incredibly sweet and delicious and a little bit thick. I now realize we were chugging cheap juice concentrate. Just, just, just.

[Maddie]

The concentrate just, just.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Was supposed to be fruit punch. No water.

[Maddie]

Oh, my God.

[Karen Kilgariff]

One look in my mouth and it's obvious I had a childhood full of sugar. The glove Compartment in our car was stuffed full of candy and whoever won the quiet game got first pick. Jesus. It was my dream family.

[Maddie]

Oh my God.

[Karen Kilgariff]

This wasn't for long car trips. It was for whenever my mom wanted us to be quiet. Basically every time we got in the car.

[Maddie]

It sounds like someone did not want a parent in this situation. And I'm gonna guess it was the parent who didn't want a parent there.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Feels like maybe this parent bought the wrong parenting book. And so none of the tricks worked right. So it became just like food reward.

[Maddie]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And. Or I'll kill you or go away. Here, drink this juice concentrate and maybe you'll go into a diabetic coma.

[Maddie]

Definitely the 80s.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And then it says, did she ever wonder if the sugar was contributing to the chaos? No shade on my mom. She was doing the best she could with what she had at the time. I think she's the best mom in the world. I should have read this before we started that discussion.

[Maddie]

Oops, sorry.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And she lives next door to me now. Oh, fun. Don't tell her we said this. Happy to spoil my kids with sugar. I've asked her to tone it down a bit and mostly give them things that have recognizable ingredients. SSDGM and add water if that's what the directions say. And then there's no name on that. So good.

[Maddie]

Oh, just concentrate. Concentrated juice.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Sipping it down, gulping it.

[Maddie]

Thick. It's thick.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And that's like your treat drink. Yeah, that's the drink I want to get.

[Maddie]

That's hilarious. I thought it was so good.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I bet it was exactly what the doctor ordered.

[Maddie]

Yeah. Okay, here we go. Not going to read you this. Let's save the positive words to the end, shall we? When I was a junior in high school, my family picked up from the Utah Salt Lake Valley and moved to Arizona. When we moved into our new house, things were very strange. Right away we began to notice that there were many cupboards that were still full of items. Almost like someone had been in a hurry to leave. Some of the items that we found were a stack of gory religious brochures depicting a bloody Jesus on the cross.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah, he's pretty bloody.

[Maddie]

Yeah. Pounds of food, animal bones in jars, and four safety deposit box keys.

[Karen Kilgariff]

What was happening in that house?

[Maddie]

Uh huh. Upon finding the keys, my mom reached out to their real estate agent to get the keys back to the owners. After not hearing back, my mom reached out to our real estate agent and asked if she could pass along the message. The real estate agent, let's call her Deborah informed my mom that she could also not get a hold of the real estate agent, their real estate agent. And the number for the real estate agent had been disconnected. Deborah was confused, leading her to reach out to the real estate agent's brokerage. Turns out the brokerage never existed.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yes.

[Maddie]

We ended up talking with many neighbors and learned that the previous owners had lived there for about 15 years and never even been seen by anyone in the neighborhood.

[Karen Kilgariff]

A vampire. This is a vampire story.

[Maddie]

We learned that the night before they moved out, there were 10 police cars that came to the house following an apparent bomb threat. The boyfriend had found out that the family was in. Wait for it. Witness protection. No twisteroo. There you go.

[Karen Kilgariff]

There it is.

[Maddie]

There it is.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That's what we were looking for.

[Maddie]

Vampire witness protection program that's coming this fall. Oh my God.

[Karen Kilgariff]

All of the kids from what we do in the shadows have to go into witness protection. Oh my God.

[Maddie]

Yeah. The dad had been a big time drug dealer in New Mexico and had been an informant for the police in order to not go to prison. So the family moved to Arizona in order to get away from the gang affiliated members that knew he was involved. So when the boyfriend, I'm guessing the boyfriend of the daughter that lived there found out that they were in witness protection, you know, she fucking told him. Like 15 year old daughter or something. Of course. Guess what? Oh.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Just so you know. Yeah.

[Maddie]

Don't tell anyone.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Like the reason we're so exotic and.

[Maddie]

Exciting, like that's like a big time, big deal. So when the boyfriend found out that they were in witness protection, the family had to pick up and move somewhere else. Fucking teenage girls, man.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Zip it.

[Maddie]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Practice now.

[Maddie]

Like witness protection is great until your daughter becomes a teenager and then you're fucked.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Then you're fucked. Then you have to get her into her own separate protection. That's not near you.

[Maddie]

No.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Also. Okay, it might. My question might be answered.

[Maddie]

Let's see. As a 16 year old at the time, this was the coolest thing that had ever happened to me. And no one in my family seemed to understand how insane the chances of that happening were. Now back to the pleasantries. I began this podcast when I first got a phone at 12 years old.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Oh my.

[Maddie]

Sorry. I had just watched a documentary about Ted Bundy and I wanted to listen to more true crime, so I went onto itunes and what did I find? The first episode of, you guessed it, my favorite murder.

[Karen Kilgariff]

This is the thing. I mean, we talk about like the abandonment of the 70s or whatever. It's just like this is kind of how it goes. Sometimes you're 12, you're flipping around.

[Maddie]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Or yeah. On your phone.

[Maddie]

Right?

[Karen Kilgariff]

And then you're just like, hey, hey, Ted Bundy. Wait, what's this? The story of a friendly man in a wonderful fisherman sweater.

[Maddie]

I must know more. Yeah. I mean, yeah. I kind of feel like she belongs with us.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Sixth grader. No, she doesn't.

[Maddie]

A 12 year old. I don't know, man. If she's gonna go looking for Ted Bundy content, this is the best option. That could have happened to her. It could have gotten so much worse than that.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Oh, yeah, you're so true.

[Maddie]

You know what I mean? We gave her fucking life lessons and shit.

[Karen Kilgariff]

We pulled her in, we taught her the importance of making mistakes.

[Maddie]

We put her under a little vampire.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Batwing, we said, hey, guess what? The world's changing and we're gonna all learn lessons together. Wanna come with us?

[Maddie]

Yeah. Exactly.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Let's hear what she has to say about it.

[Maddie]

Since then, you've seen me through graduating high school, graduating college, getting married, and now the first five weeks of pregnancy.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Wow. From a 12 year old.

[Maddie]

I truly would not be who I am without you. God, with all my love, Sahara.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Sahara.

[Maddie]

Touching.

[Karen Kilgariff]

We love you.

[Maddie]

But turned touching all of a sudden.

[Karen Kilgariff]

God, I'm so glad that 12 year old went on to make something of herself. Jesus.

[Maddie]

Yeah, she did it.

[Karen Kilgariff]

She did it. She even graduated college. Like without.

[Maddie]

Yeah, we didn't even fucking do that.

[Karen Kilgariff]

We didn't fuck that up for her. No, it's do's and don'ts.

[Maddie]

When do we need to get those honorary college degrees that we have so earned and deserved?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Wow.

[Maddie]

Because we've helped other people through college.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Looking for the ultimate holiday gift.

[Maddie]

Skip the scented candles and give the gift of amazing sleep with Miracle Maid sheets.

[Karen Kilgariff]

These sheets are self cleaning, temperature regulating and luxuriously soft. Everything you'd want in a gift.

[Maddie]

Miracle Made offers a whole line of antibacterial bedding that prevents up to 99.7% of bacterial growth.

[Karen Kilgariff]

They're self cooling and designed to keep you at the perfect temperature all night.

[Maddie]

And if you're worried about sacrificing comfort or quality, Miracle Maid has bedding that's as luxurious as a five star hotel without the hefty price tag.

[Karen Kilgariff]

We got sent these sheets and I have to say, sometimes you don't think about it where you're like, oh, I don't need luxurious sheets. That's just like, let's keep it basic. I swear to God, as a gift, even Just a gift to yourself. Miracle made sheets are going to make you so happy you got them.

[Maddie]

Definitely. And if you have a single pet, you need this too because the antibacterial thing is next level. So go to trymiracle.com murder to try miracle made sheets.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And whether you're buying them for yourself or as a gift for a loved one, if you order today, you can save over 40%. And if you use our promo code Murder at checkout, you'll get three free towels and save an extra 20%.

[Maddie]

Miracle Maid is so confident in their product, it's backed with a 30 day money back guarantee. So if you aren't 100% satisfied, you'll get a full refund.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Upgrade your sleep today with Miracle Maid one more time.

[Maddie]

That URL is trymiracle.com murder and use the code murder to claim your free 3pc towel set and save over 40% off.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That's trymiracle.com murder to treat yourself.

[Maddie]

Thank you to Miracle Maid for sponsoring this episode. Goodbye.

[Karen Kilgariff]

All right, I made this one last because it's such a nice idea. Okay, it's glitch in the Matrix plus a teacher tribute. And then it says Dear Karen in Georgia plus. Exactly right. Staff, longtime listener, third time writer. This might seem long, but I promise it's heartwarming. When I was in high school, there was a teacher named Mr. Truax. He taught environmental science and he was a well known character in the hallways. Always had a smile on his face and always went out to support the sports teams. My junior year, me, him and one of my best friends created a salsa club which consisted of simply eating chips and salsa once a week. Salsa club.

[Maddie]

I thought it was going to be a dancing club. That's cute.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah, not ballroom dancing, just eating chips.

[Maddie]

That's cute.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Where most of the time he'd bring the salsa because he made it fresh at home. So yeah, he was really cool. He was an overall kind individual who shared so many lives. He passed away tragically in the summer of 2019 doing what he loved, hiking in the mountains.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Wow.

[Maddie]

Wow.

[Karen Kilgariff]

So this came right after I graduated high school and the whole community was saddened because he was such a pleasant person. I never had the chance to take environmental science, but he would put on a week long project for students to sort through the trash in our cafeteria to see the real effects of food waste. Flash forward to 2022. I'm in my senior year of college and I apply for a job that analyzes food waste in Maine and looks for solutions that can be Applied to various industries. I never really cared about food waste before this. I was 21 and thus extremely self obsessed. But I kept thinking about Mr. Truax's project and felt called to do this work. Mr. Truax's wife also worked in my high school, and I'd taken two of her classes. Both me and my older sister had attended this school, and the Truaxes were kind of like family friends. Anyways, the whole year I kept thinking I should email Mrs. Truax and tell her about this job and how I felt inspired to honor her late husband. But I just never got around to it. Then one day after I graduated, I felt this weird, overwhelming urge to send her that email. Feeling strange, I sat down and detailed how I missed him, along with the work I had done the previous year and how it was my way of continuing Mr. Truax's legacy. It was late and I didn't want to send it, so I scheduled the email to be sent the next morning at 8am I noticed she had emailed me back. And it turns out that day was Mr. Truax's birthday.

[Maddie]

Oh my God.

[Karen Kilgariff]

She was touched to get a remembrance. And she told me she still canned salsa to keep his tradition going.

[Maddie]

Aw.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I'd love to say that I knew that it was his birthday, but I had no clue. Was he urging me from beyond? Did my intuition sense that it was significant for me to send this particular email on that particular day after thinking about it for months? I think a lot about this as a positive glitch in the matrix. And I think about Mr. Truex a lot, as he was such a good person who passed too young. Many of us have complicated. Oh, God, this is gonna get me.

[Maddie]

Oh, no.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Many of us have complicated relationships with high school, but sometimes we're lucky enough to have good individuals who shape us in those uncertain years. Like, what a beautiful thing. So beautiful to do for someone who actually really did that work. Yeah, like when I first was reading this, I was like, please don't tell me this is gonna. And it's like, oh, no. This is just like the coolest person who died young.

[Maddie]

Yeah. Shout out to Mrs. Mercer. I fucking would not be who I am today without her.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Judy Kavanaugh. Judy Kavanaugh taught me everything about British literature and how to be a cool, badass lady. It's also my sister Adrian's mother. Oh, lovely, right? Small town shit. We're lucky enough to have good individuals who shape us in those uncertain years. Your podcast has stayed with me through high school. College, graduate school, telling you and beyond telling you, I feel you are my wise aunts giving me advice about how to survive to the point where my mother thinks I fear monger you probably do. Cause we do too. Thank you for all you do in terms of mental health, fucking politeness and your advice on how to live in a politically precarious place as a young woman. Stay sexy and maybe send that email H. And then it says, P.S. i've made so many people listen to your episode released right after Roe v. Wade was overturned, where you talk about how devastating this reality can be. Thanks for speaking up about it. And hopefully we aren't doomed to hear men opine about a female health crisis for eternity.

[Maddie]

Oh, h, H. I think in honor of H and Mr. Truax, we should do an unprecedented thing and end on that one with five stories.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Did Mr. Truax outdo us all?

[Maddie]

He usurped this email about a celebrity sighting that I now can't read. So I think we're gonna have.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It's a tribute, I think. That's nice.

[Maddie]

Changing it up a little like he did.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah, I think. Yeah. Nice one.

[Maddie]

You know what I mean?

[Karen Kilgariff]

All right. Well, I mean, first time ever.

[Maddie]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Guys, look for your Easter eggs. This is a minisode unlike any minisode ever before.

[Maddie]

Never in the history of my favorite murder.

[Karen Kilgariff]

This is where it all falls apart.

[Maddie]

You've been 12 years old. Oh, shit.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Don't curse us. Thanks for listening since you were 12 years old.

[Maddie]

Yeah, we appreciate you.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Pretty nice.

[Maddie]

Stay sexy and don't get murdered.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Goodbye, 12 year old Elvis.

[Maddie]

Do you want a cookie?

[Karen Kilgariff]

This has been an exactly right production.

[Maddie]

Our senior producer is Alejandra Keck.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Our editor is Aristotle Acevedo.

[Maddie]

This episode was mixed by Liana Squalace.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Email your hometowns to myfavoritemurdermail.com and follow.

[Maddie]

The show on Instagram and Facebook at. My favorite murder.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Goodbye.