MFM Minisode 448

Summary

My Favorite Murder with Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark Episode: MFM Minisode 448 Release Date: August 11, 2025

My Favorite Murder Mini-episode 448 delivers another captivating blend of true crime and dark humor as hosts Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark delve into listener-submitted stories. This detailed summary highlights the key discussions, insights, and twists presented throughout the episode, complete with notable quotes and timestamps for reference.

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Introduction

The episode begins with Karen and Georgia welcoming listeners to My Favorite Murder Minisode 448. Skipping the usual introductory advertisements, the duo dives straight into reading and dissecting intriguing listener emails that narrate bizarre and chilling tales.

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Listener Story 1: A Corpse in the Attic

Timestamp: [02:23] – [06:15]

Karen introduces a spine-tingling story sent by a listener named Elle from South Wales, UK. Elle recounts her experience growing up with a hidden corpse in her granny’s attic.

Summary:

• Background: Elle’s granny lived in a council block with an upstairs neighbor, Lee, who seemingly had no family.
• The Twist: After Lee's death from cancer, police discovered her husband’s body in the shared garden, revealing that Lee had murdered him three years prior and hidden his body in the attic.
• Key Moments:
  • "She was chemically mummified there, and there were 50 layers of wrapping, including plastic bags, tarps, and roofing." ([04:28] - Karen)
  • The discovery coincided with Lee's funeral, unraveling the dark secret.

Insights:

• The story underscores how appearances can be deceiving and the hidden lives people lead.
• Elle reflects on the eerie coincidence that the killer’s actions remained concealed for so long, almost like a plot from a horror movie.

---

Listener Story 2: Wolf in Sheep's Clothing

Timestamp: [06:15] – [15:42]

The next email, titled "Wolf in Sheep's Clothing," shares Georgia’s unsettling memories of her youth pastor, who harbored a dark secret.

Summary:

• Background: Georgia reflects on her childhood in a small town where her father was the youth pastor.
• The Incident: A trusted figure, the youth pastor, was revealed to be engaging in illicit activities, such as paying women for sex.
• Consequences: His departure from the town coincided with the cessation of a local masked flasher’s activities, leading Georgia’s mother to suspect a connection.
• Key Moments:
  • "One day my mom was sitting at the lunch table at school and some student teachers started talking about him and how he pays their friends for sex." ([08:19] - Georgia)
  • "Another crazy coincidence. Our masked town flasher suddenly stopped terrorizing young women once this man left town." ([09:14] - Georgia)

Insights:

• The narrative highlights the impact of hidden abuses of power and the ripple effects within a community.
• Georgia’s connection of the pastor’s misconduct to the flasher’s behavior suggests a broader pattern of concealed wrongdoing.

---

Listener Story 3: A Tale of Two Tonys

Timestamp: [15:42] – [24:55]

Karen and Georgia then explore a humorous yet unnerving story titled "A Tale of Two Tonys," shared by a listener recounting a bizarre coincidence.

Summary:

• Background: In the 1990s, Karen’s family’s car broke down, leading them to seek help from a mechanic named Tony, referred via the phone book.
• The Twist: Upon arrival, they discovered they had mistakenly gone to the house of another Tony with the same name.
• Key Moments:
  • "We stumbled upon a glitch in the Matrix where two Tonys existed with the same exact name and who work on cars from their homes." ([12:33] - Karen)
  • "He and his family welcomed us into their home with no questions asked." ([14:13] - Georgia)

Insights:

• The story underscores the unpredictability of coincidences and the potential perils hidden within seemingly innocent mix-ups.
• Karen humorously speculates on the worst-case scenarios, adding a layer of dark comedy to the unsettling possibility of accidental encounters.

---

Listener Story 4: World War II Pets and Attic Treasures

Timestamp: [24:55] – [30:22]

In a blend of history and personal anecdote, Georgia shares a heartfelt story about her grandfather’s World War II experiences and the discovery of unexpected artifacts.

Summary:

• Background: Georgia found over 500 letters from her grandfather detailing his military service during World War II, including humorous and poignant moments.
• The Incident: Among the letters, a photo of a puppy sneaking onto a ship for morale boosts stands out.
• Key Moments:
  • "They just brought a puppy into war. Into war on a ship." ([16:35] - Georgia)
  • "We wondered that... yes. The 81st Infantry Division Wildcats." ([16:44] - Georgia)

Insights:

• The narrative highlights the often-overlooked personal stories of soldiers and the small comforts that sustained them.
• Georgia’s anticipation of reading her grandfather’s letters on a podcast emphasizes the enduring nature of family histories and their relevance to present-day listeners.

---

Listener Story 5: A Fishy Client

Timestamp: [30:22] – [32:43]

Karen recounts a bizarre encounter from her side hustle of cleaning fish tanks, leading to an unexpected confrontation with Jeffrey Epstein’s office.

Summary:

• Background: While working as a fish tank cleaner in the Virgin Islands, Karen encountered striking signs that linked her client’s office to the notorious Jeffrey Epstein.
• The Twist: Realizing she was cleaning Epstein’s actual office, Karen chose to distance herself, culminating in witnessing the FBI raid on "Pedophile Island."
• Key Moments:
  • "As I stared at the giant portraits plastering the walls of young girls that I had assumed were my cl." ([22:40] - Karen)
  • "In the end, my services were no longer required when he was arrested." ([23:59] - Karen)

Insights:

• This chilling revelation underscores the often-hidden darkness behind seemingly routine interactions.
• Karen’s decision to withdraw from the situation highlights personal accountability and the importance of recognizing moral boundaries.

---

Conclusion

Throughout MFM Minisode 448, Karen and Georgia adeptly blend storytelling with insightful commentary, shedding light on the complexities of human behavior and the eerie coincidences that tie disparate events together. Their ability to infuse humor into dark narratives provides a unique and engaging listening experience, inviting audiences to reflect on the hidden facets of everyday life.

Notable Quotes:

• "She was chemically mummified there, and there were 50 layers of wrapping, including plastic bags, tarps, and roofing." ([04:28] - Karen)
• "We stumbled upon a glitch in the Matrix where two Tonys existed with the same exact name and who work on cars from their homes." ([12:33] - Karen)
• "They just brought a puppy into war. Into war on a ship." ([16:35] - Georgia)
• "As I stared at the giant portraits plastering the walls of young girls that I had assumed were my cl." ([22:40] - Karen)

---

Final Thoughts: MFM Minisode 448 exemplifies the podcast's signature style—melding true crime with personal anecdotes and humor. By sharing and analyzing these listener stories, Karen and Georgia continue to build a community united by curiosity and the thrill of uncovering the unknown.

Transcript

[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

That's right.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It's the one where we read your.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Emails and we're gonna do it now.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Again.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Again. And now when we start. Sure.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I'm not gonna read you the subject.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Okay.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It's a fun reveal.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Okay.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It starts out, hello, Karen, Georgia and pets. So it turns out I spent part of my childhood in an apartment with a corpse in the attic.

[Georgia Hardstark]

What? Okay, starting strong.

[Karen Kilgariff]

So it says, before we begin, I just need to say that my granny had nothing to do with this. It just happened at the small housing complex where she lived. Before she moved in. And it came to light after her death. It also brought the little ex mining village in Wales. I would pronounce it Bedou. Cause that's B, E, D, D, A, U. And it says in parentheses pronounced Baeth.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I, of course. How would you have guessed that?

[Karen Kilgariff]

If there's any place that needs a spell it like you say it. It's Wales.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Oh, yeah. Baethide High School.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Baethide High School. Go Baethide. This case brought the town of Baythai, Wales, to the attention of the whole world. My granny died back in 2015, and she had been living in a council block of four flats for older people for 15 years since being widowed. Her upstairs neighbor was a younger woman called Lee, whose husband had, quote, left her before my granny moved in. Lee really helpful to my granny when she was ill. So when Lee became seriously ill with cancer, my mother and father helped her out as she didn't have a family, or so we thought.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Right.

[Karen Kilgariff]

When she died, my mother struggled to register her death because her next of kin was still listed as her husband, who we all thought had left her before we knew her. Fast forward to a month after Lee's funeral in which my mother said, we all heard so many different stories from Lee, but only God and Lee know who she really was. She was saying that in the best way possible. And then it says, oh, how prophetic. My dad told me that the police had found a body in the shared garden where my granny had lived. I jokingly asked if it was Lee's husband, and my dad just nodded and said that my mother was being interviewed by the police.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Oh, my God.

[Karen Kilgariff]

She thinks she's being funny.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Oh, is Lee's husband.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah. He's like, actually, yes. Don't ask questions you don't want the answers to.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah. You don't want the affirmative answers to. Turns out that three years before my granny moved in in 1997, during a row with her husband, Lee hit him in the head with a ceramic frog and killed him. The shape of the frog perfectly matched the hole in his skull. She then wrapped him up in plastic and put him in the attic. He was chemically mummified there, and there were 50 layers of wrapping, including plastic bags, tarps, and roofing. Plastic.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Sorry, can we go back? She kept the ceramic frog that she used to kill her husband.

[Karen Kilgariff]

She must have, because they either had it or they had it by a replica.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Right, okay, go on.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I mean, if she killed him.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah. And then she's like, I really love this frog.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yep. Or I really love that I did this.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I mean, okay. Anytime he started to smell, she added another layer. He was up there for 18 years. Wow. She was still claiming his Korean War pension this whole time.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Okay, here we go.

[Karen Kilgariff]

The plastic package the body was in was found under a bench in the shared garden by the woman who moved into my granny's flat when she was clearing a corner of the garden to make a memorial for Lee. We think Lee broke her leg moving the body to the garden. And that's how she found out she had cancer and was dying and how my mother started caring for her. So basically this is a perfectly laid out horror movie.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah, the like thinking backness of it all.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah. I'm so glad my dad and my uncle were too busy to help her, quote, get something from the attic when she asked. They were enmeshed in this woman's life.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Oh my God.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And then it just ends with stay sexy and don't help granny's neighbors move suspicious packages. Elle from South Wales, uk.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Wow. You have to imagine, and I've always thought about this, there has to be at least a couple dozen people in the world who have unknown bodies in their place of residence.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yes, right, absolutely.

[Georgia Hardstark]

A couple, few dozen. Remember the barrel?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Bear Creek?

[Georgia Hardstark]

No, the one where they found a barrel under the house.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Oh, yes. In the basement.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yes, yes. And like went back a few owners and it turned out he had killed her. Yeah. Like, there's gotta be a few.

[Karen Kilgariff]

There's gotta be.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I hope it's not mine.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I thought you were gonna say there's gotta be people out there who have helped a killer do something unknowingly that.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Too aided and abetted.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah. There's so many things out in the world.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Okay, mine is called Wolf in Sheep's Clothing. Hi, I'm listening to Minisode 444 where you ask for wolf in sheep's clothing story.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Oh, okay.

[Georgia Hardstark]

And now my time has finally come. My family and I spent most of the aughts 2000s, it says, in a seemingly quintessential small town. I have fond memories of summer days spent at the public pool where my mom, a teacher at the time, would bake in the sun while my brother and I swam for hours. Yes, the evenings were spent just eating dinner on the back porch, followed by a game of wiffle ball. Unfortunately, these games often turned into my dad and whoever was over at the time taking turns batting while my brother and I were sent to wait in the neighbor's yard on the other side of the fence to catch the balls. It was agonizing as an 8 year old who just learned how to bat without a tea. But I digress. On one occasion, our youth pastor came over for one of these legendary evenings. This was a normal occurrence as my dad was the pastor at our church. Rather than cook, my parents ordered wings from our local shop. About midway through our meal, I look up at our guest and see this man, all caps covered in wing sauce. The sauce covered at least 2 inches around his mouth and coated every finger past his knuckles. I remember being mesmerized and horrified by this man. How could this happen? Didn't it bother him? Where was his napkin? Something about that struck a nerve in my 8 year old body and I never trusted him again. Which I totally understand. Like people who eat like barbecue and just get it everywhere. I couldn't live with myself.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It's one thing to do that by yourself at home watching TV alone, but like in a restaurant, that 8 year old was exactly right. Like, are you kidding me? Where you're just like. And just don't care what people think.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Well, flash forward to 2018. I'm chatting with my mom about this absurd memory when she goes, you know, it's wild. You mentioned not trusting him because we found out later that he was paying women for sex at the local college. That's right. One day my mom was sitting at the lunch table at school and some student teachers started talking about him and how he pays their friends for sex. Needless to say, he was quickly fired from his role as youth pastor and sent to therapy.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I feel like they should maybe just fire all the youth pastors and start with a clean slate. Because I can't just. All I see are bad stories about.

[Georgia Hardstark]

This and anyone who like any man who like, asks to be a pastor. No, it has to go to someone who doesn't want to do it.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That's too humble.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yes.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Another crazy coincidence. Our masked town flasher suddenly stopped terrorizing young women once this man left town.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Oh shit.

[Georgia Hardstark]

My mom thinks it was him. She's correct. Love you both. You've been alongside me through thyroid cancer, six years in remission.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yay.

[Georgia Hardstark]

And the births of my three wonderful insane children. Thank you for all you do. Stay sexy and don't trust a messy wing eater.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Em. Em, you must have the kind of confidence of a person who's a true visionary, where you're just like as a child. I spotted the town.

[Georgia Hardstark]

You're not even doing like anything mean. It's just like, this is not an okay move for an adult. And I'm suspish.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yes.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Love it.

[Karen Kilgariff]

The vibe is wrong.

[Georgia Hardstark]

The vibe's wrong.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah.

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Remember back when cars broke down and you had to take them to the mechanic all the time? Yeah.

[Georgia Hardstark]

And you had your mechanic and you were his friend. Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

My auntie referred her to a family friend who happened to be a mechanic named Tony and who worked out of his garage. This also seemed like the norm for the time where you always saved money on car repairs by going to someone's home. Yep. My dad's friend Duke's son fixed our car for years.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Amazing.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Anywho, for whatever reason, my mom used the phone book to get Tony's address while my auntie set up the appointment to drop the car off. Again, this was the 90s, so I don't remember if people were just way more discreet with information, but my auntie likely referred her to the phone book for his address. Well, the time came and we, my 30ish year old mom and her two young children went to Tony's house. Nothing was amiss. Until one hour turned into four hours later and we were still waiting for my auntie to pick us up. My mom tried calling multiple times using Tony's landline and left increasingly desperate messages. When my auntie finally answered, she was frantic and asked where the hell we were and that we were supposed to be at Tony's house hours ago. Confused, my mom told her that we were at Toni's house. But no, no, no, we weren't because she was at Toni's house. We had a memento moment before memento was even a thing and went in circles putting the pieces together. Apparently, we stumbled upon a glitch in the Matrix where two Tonys existed with the same exact name and who work on cars from their homes.

[Georgia Hardstark]

That's wild.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Now, my mom had never spoken to this imposter Tony, nor was there any indication that he was a mechanic in the phone book. But when we showed up with our broke ass car, he and his family welcomed us into their home with no questions asked.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I love it. Okay, someone must have agreed to this.

[Karen Kilgariff]

They let us play with their dog for four hours and assured us the car would be fixed.

[Georgia Hardstark]

What a lovely family.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I know. When all was finally revealed, everyone had a good laugh and imposter Tony insisted on repairing our car.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Oh my gosh.

[Karen Kilgariff]

He still wanted to do it.

[Georgia Hardstark]

And he knew how.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah, exactly. Thank God. Thinking back, we got very lucky that it worked out better than anyone could have imagined. I mean, at best, Tony could have just Been a regular schmo who had no idea what the hell we were doing at his house. And at worst, he could have been a murderer waiting for an unsuspecting family to come along. Yeah, the laziest murderer ever to.

[Georgia Hardstark]

When someone gets here, I'll take care of it.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah, but until that time, I'm just gonna fix cars.

[Georgia Hardstark]

This lazy boy isn't gonna do my thing.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah. Or, and I imagine this often, what if imposter Tony and his family thought we were the crazed murderers masquerading as a humble family in need of car repairs? It's like one of those upside down fairy tales where we terrorize this poor family for four hours with our lies of someone is coming to pick us up. It will be just another 10 minutes.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Four hours.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It's so embarrassing. That's how I lived my entire childhood of being at someone's house. And they're like, well, we're starting dinner. You can sit in the living room if you want to.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Cause your mom's not here yet.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah, yeah, they'll be here soon. Poor things just wanted to sit down to dinner and get on with their lives. That's the story. Just a crazy set of coincidences fostered by the lack of communication in the 90s, I guess. Who the fuck knows? Love you guys and can't wait to see you when you come to Denver. Ssdgm. Karras.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yay.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I know. That's the first can't wait to see you that we've gotten in an email.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Exciting. Okay, World War II puppy, stowaways and attic treasures. This one's called. Hi, all. Longtime listener, first time writer, first. Thank you for getting me through the pandemic. I'm a healthcare worker and while not on the front lines, I went to work every day hoping my immunocompromised patients would survive and desperately trying to convince them to wear a mask.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Sorry, how is that not being on the front lines? You're there. You don't have to be in the emergency room.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Right.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Go ahead.

[Georgia Hardstark]

MFM was a consistent place I could go to laugh and commiserate. Thank you so much. Oh, that's nice. I was listening to episode 486 about Smokey the Yorkie World War II hero dog, where you wondered if people snuck pets when they went to war. We wondered that.

[Karen Kilgariff]

You know, I love to just throw in some conjecture when you're trying to tell a story. Yeah, it's my part.

[Georgia Hardstark]

And the short answer is yes.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yay.

[Georgia Hardstark]

The long answer is in 2014, after my grandpa Passed. We went through my mom's family home and in the attic we found boxes of magazines, clippings, photos, camp papers, and other artifacts spanning my grandpa's military service in World War II. This includes over 500 letters he wrote to my grandma. From induction and training to the Pacific theater and finally occupied Japan. He's 500. He was salty about being drafted, but he did the best he could and managed to keep his sense of humor. The letters are funny, sarcastic, sometimes devastating, but always end with his love and devotion to my grandma. While going through it all, I found a photo of someone who had snuck a puppy in a boat going to the Pacific. I guess, ultimately, what were they going to do about it? Nothing. Like a puppy to boost morale. They just brought a puppy on into war. Into war on a ship. They also traveled with a sanctioned regiment mascot, a dog named Murphy, and a division mascot, a live all caps Bobcat.

[Karen Kilgariff]

What?

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yes.

[Karen Kilgariff]

What?

[Georgia Hardstark]

Named Tuffy. That's a good name.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Our second dog, we had a dog named Mugsy who had a puppy, and we named the puppy Tuffy.

[Georgia Hardstark]

What? I've never heard before. That's so funny. They were the 81st Infantry Division Wildcats. That doesn't excuse anything.

[Karen Kilgariff]

How do you train or even slightly control?

[Georgia Hardstark]

This guy's like, can you put me back in the wild, please?

[Karen Kilgariff]

I don't want to be in war. I don't.

[Georgia Hardstark]

At the zoo. At the, like, worst. But not.

[Karen Kilgariff]

But not the South Pacific.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Like, mascots are supposed to be drawings, not actual. And then it says, oh, the 40s of it all. Yeah, that's right. Oh, shameless plug. My friend Carson, also a big MFM fan, and I have decided to read the letters on a podcast. It's called 500 Letters to Nana and it will start August 2025.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Cute.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah, we keep saying to each other, bigger idiots than you as we press forward with this project. Also, thanks to George's Nana.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Aw ye.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Thanks again for snapping me out of it on some dark days. Love to you and all your morale boosting pets, Katie. Hell yeah. 500 letters to Nana. Go listen to. We'll support your local Murderino.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I think that's such a great idea. I would love to hear those letters.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Totally. That's so exciting. That's really awesome.

[Karen Kilgariff]

They're going to be doing a podcast for 10 years too. Buckle the fuck up. That's the fun. You can't end that podcast before they find out how they get out of that fucking war.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I know what's going to happen.

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[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

With Simplisafe, you get state of the art protection for the people and the space that you love.

[Karen Kilgariff]

SimpliSafe's new Active Guard Outdoor Protection helps stop break ins before they happen.

[Georgia Hardstark]

If someone's lurking, agents talk to them in real time, turning on spotlights and can call the police, proactively deterring break ins before they start.

[Karen Kilgariff]

SimpliSafe's 247 monitoring costs less than a dollar a day.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Over 4 million Americans trust SimpliSafe, and they're ranked number one in customer service by Newsweek and USA Today. I know you guys love posting your vacation pics online, but all that's doing is telling people that they can break into your house right now because you're not home, right?

[Karen Kilgariff]

I mean, there's really no better feeling when you just have an inkling of like, oh wait, is the back door open? Is something going on? Simply Safe's app. You can just go on there and check all your cameras. You can check everything and you know it's being monitored.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Like having the peace of mind that when I do post my vacation photos I can also keep track of my and make sure it's safe.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I really like that peace of mind. Is this affordable and this simple and actually this comprehensive? Visit SimpliSafe.com fave to claim 50% off a new system with a professional monitoring plan and get your first month free.

[Georgia Hardstark]

That's SimpliSafe.com fav there's no safe like SimpliSafe. Goodbye.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Okay, this When I read this email, I was like, this might be it in terms of people reaching out and giving us some information, telling us their own personal story.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Better than a snail eating green beans.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I mean, it's just. It's all the scale of how you live your life.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Sure.

[Karen Kilgariff]

The subject line of this is a fishy client. Hey, you guys. It could be. Hey, you guys. Maybe a lot of S's I'm writing in after hearing Karen describe how her dad had a fish tank that took way too much effort to care for. Turns out that's my whole thing. I am the curator of aquatic husbandry at the aquarium. What?

[Georgia Hardstark]

Wow.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Huge.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I've had a storied career as a shark wrangler, jellyfish breeder, and octopus playmate.

[Georgia Hardstark]

What the fuck?

[Karen Kilgariff]

I already love you so much.

[Georgia Hardstark]

What a life to live.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I used to say I wanted to be a marine biologist because it sounded conceptually interesting as a child, you get.

[Georgia Hardstark]

To play with a fucking octopus or wrangle a shark. Oh, my God. Okay.

[Karen Kilgariff]

But those aren't the stories I'm here to tell you. I'm here to tell you about one of my side hustles when I was living in the Virgin Islands taking care of fish tanks at various businesses. Love that too. One of which was in a financial office where I initially felt bad about overcharging them. That is, until I looked down at a baseball hat sitting on the desk of my client, and it read, Little St. James, an island otherwise known by the locals as Pedophile Island.

[Georgia Hardstark]

No.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Ha, ha. Ready? My first thought. Who in their right mind would have a hat bragging about visiting that island? Then it hit me like a wave. As I stared at the giant portraits plastering the walls of young girls that I had assumed were my cl. I was standing in Jeffrey Epstein's actual office.

[Georgia Hardstark]

We're gonna get. We can't. I'm so. This is insane, right?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Right?

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

This is the kind of email I've been waiting for.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Shit.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Now I'm gonna just break right here, right now, listener, and say, hey, we can't verify our emails.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Right?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Nor do we.

[Georgia Hardstark]

It sounds legit. Someone's gotta clean the fish tank of people's business.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And there's a large trust factor in the whole minisode concept, which there no reason not to trust people, Right? Usually we can kind of suss out if someone sounds like they're making up a story, I believe them. That's when I started to notice the odd details about the building, like where there were and weren't cameras and that his office, locked from both the inside and the outside. Ah. Mm. These are details that sometimes we don't notice in the day to day. Yeah, but we should. Suddenly overcharging him didn't seem like such a bad idea because fuck that guy. After that, whenever I came in to clean the fish tank and the boss was in, I always opted to different day.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Holy shit.

[Karen Kilgariff]

In the end, my services were no longer required when he was arrested. And yes, we did take a boat out there to watch the FBI raid pedophile island. This person is a firsthand if they are true in these alleged claims. They're a first person witness to all of that shit.

[Georgia Hardstark]

This is wild.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Mostly I wanted to see if the rumor was true that he had a life size statue of a cow, which was someone's job to move around the island occasionally. Anyway, they don't confirm it. Anyway, I hope this gets read that y' all are having a fin tastic day. A girl can dream. Stay sexy and always figure out who you're working for. Best fishes. Caroline.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Caroline. Let's hang out immediately. I mean, and how am I? The whole time I was like, how do I follow this? How do I follow this? I have one more I can follow this. I know you feel like me.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Well, look, Caroline brought us like hot breaking major worldwide news goss. So it's just a different thing.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Wild amazing kids stay in school and become a marine biologist.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That's right.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I'm not gonna read you the title. Hello, Georgia, Karen and all the MFM furry friends and family. Your podcast has brought me so much joy over the years. So I'll start this story off with a big thank you. You've made subway rides, long car trips, plane rides and dog walks all bearable. Okay, so this story begins in my hometown of Brights Grove, Ontario, Canada. Ever heard of it? I didn't think so. Brights grove. I was 15 or 16 years old, just finishing my 10th or 11th year of high school. I don't remember slash, can't do the math. And needed my own income to supply myself with copious amounts of vanilla and lemon flavored vodka. And it says I literally winced while writing that for the summer ahead.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Vanilla vodka is really upsetting me right now.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I accidentally ordered a drink recently with vanilla vodka, and as soon as I took a sip, I was just like Transported to my 20s. It was awful. It was awful. It's disgusting.

[Karen Kilgariff]

So bad.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Every kid in my hometown either worked at one of two places, the local restaurant or the grocery store. I was too scared of breaking change. Again, the math. So I Never applied to the restaurant and got myself a job at the grocery store's produce department.

[Karen Kilgariff]

They have it there too, girl.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah, but if you go to the produce department, you're stacking bananas. Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

You're just like, yeah, no math.

[Georgia Hardstark]

The jobs were broken down by department. Most of my friends were hired to work in the bakery or at the front till. Well, I was blessed with a job of stocking fruits and veggies. Perhaps the easiest of the departments, or so I thought. I bet there's like little customer service that goes along with that.

[Karen Kilgariff]

For sure. You know, you have to help people pick ripe things.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I bet there's not a lot of people though. I would never ask anything to a fruit person, would you? I would never bother a fruit and vegetable person.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Not unless they were like, I think I did it one time because he was already doing stuff.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And it was like, can you help me pick a ripe mango?

[Georgia Hardstark]

Okay. My shifts consisted of lifting heavy boxes full of bananas, potatoes, what have you, putting them on a wheeling car and stocking the shelves for anything that needed replenishing. That's how that works. Every so often I had to put together salads or wrap cobs of corn in a five piece package. All caps. Truly exciting stuff. You can bet your butts that most of my shifts started with me violently hungover. Sneaking off to the giant freezers to regain life or trying not to throw up at the smell of rotting potatoes. Literally the worst smell proved me wrong.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I spent so much time in my 20s hungover and trying to make it through.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Like I have gone into a giant freezer to see if it helped. Helps with hangover before. Like I. I know that sensation. Yeah, it does work a little bit.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I bet.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah. One of those hungover 6:30am mornings of my youth was a memorable one. I used to stay up all night. We'd go to a rave. I'd be on drugs. And then I'd go into the bakery that morning at 6:30.

[Karen Kilgariff]

A bakery.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I worked at the local bakery and I was like, I could still hear the techno in my brain.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah, you're just, you're reverberating with the experience. Did they know that that's what you were doing or they're just like.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I mean I was like 15. I just looked great and acted great and could do anything. I was never tired. Not like now anyway. While rinsing off romaine lettuce in the giant sinks, I noticed a spider crawling up the wall just one foot away from my head. If I hadn't been so Hungover, I would have screamed and run in the other direction, but instead I lazily grabbed the box the lettuce came in and smashed a spawn of Satan into the wall. After cleaning up the demon's remains, I noticed some familiar markings on the spider's body. All caps. What they don't tell you when you're hired in the produce section is that you may come across tropical species that have traveled with the tropical fruit. This is why you don't bring Costco boxes into your. Like, you know they give those to you to pack your groceries. Don't bring those into your house.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Cause there's spiders in there. Yes.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yes. I wasn't shown this binder of species until I was a whole binder of species. That's how many. Until I was literally holding a black widow spider in a Kleenex to show my boss. I was flinging all sorts of boxes of fruit left and right without any thought, not knowing that a friggin scorpion could be hiding with the grapes and bananas. Anyways, the black widow was put in a jar and saved as a reminder to any new staff that you may run into a poisonous insect while on the job. And to be mindful, I'd like to thank my hangover for allowing me to not give a fuck about a spider crawling up the wall. Had I not had those double shots of vodka the night before, who knows where that spidey would have ended up. That's all. Stay sexy. And know that the produce section may be the easiest of the jobs at the grocery store, but is also the scariest. Yeah, Adele, she her.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Wow, Adele, you really lived through something. Now here's my thing. We had black widow spiders around a lot growing up.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I bet you did. Cause you lived out in the country.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It was like barn stuff.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

So when she was like about to describe the spider, I'm like, here we go. It's a poisonous tarantula. And it's like it's the spider you see all the time.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I've barely seen one.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Really?

[Georgia Hardstark]

Well, I've like seen a lot in one place, but not a lot in places.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It is really jarring when you see it and you see the little red hourglass, like it's real.

[Georgia Hardstark]

It's so scary, all that part.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Cause it's just like your whole life you're brought up being like danger. Ten minutes there.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Not a fan.

[Karen Kilgariff]

We don't like danger, ladies and gentlemen. We never have on this podcast and I don't think we ever will.

[Georgia Hardstark]

But write us about your dangerous things that you run into.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That's the kind of danger we like.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yes, secondhand right at my favorite murdermail. Thank you guys so much for for listening and stay sexy and don't get murdered. Goodbye Elvis. Do you want a cookie?

[Karen Kilgariff]

This has been an Exactly Right production.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Our senior producers are Alejandra Keck and Molly Smith.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Our editor is Aristotle Acevedo.

[Georgia Hardstark]

This episode was mixed by Liana Squillace.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Email your hometowns to my favorite murdermail.com.

[Georgia Hardstark]

And follow the show on Instagram at my favorite favorite murder.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Listen to my favorite murder on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Georgia Hardstark]

And now you can watch us on exactly right's YouTube page. And while you're there, please like and subscribe.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Goodbye. You know, most of us don't treat our livers with any respect.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Amen. We just kind of assume they'll keep showing up for work even if we don't.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Fortunately, LiverMD is here to help.

[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

When your Liver struggles, you feel it. Fatigue, bloating, brain fog and slower recovery from those weekend indulgences. Take control of your liver health Today with Liver MD.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Visit1md.org and use code murder to save 15% on your first order. Goodbye.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Hey, it's Ryan Reynolds here from Mint Mobile. Now. I was looking for fun ways to tell you that Mint's offer of unlimited premium wireless for $15 a month is back. So I thought it would be fun if we made $15 bills, but it turns out that's very illegal. So there goes my big idea for the commercial.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Give it a [e-mail] Switch upfront payment.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Of $45 for a 3 month plan equivalent to $15 per month Required new customer offer for first 3 months only Speed slow after 35 gigabytes of networks Busy taxes and fees extra.

[Karen Kilgariff]

See mintmobile.com if you've been waiting for a sign to finally get the car you've been dreaming of about, this is it.

[Georgia Hardstark]

The Hyundai Getaway sales event is going on now.

[Karen Kilgariff]

You can score a great deal on Hyundai's award winning lineup of SUVs including the Kona, Tucson, Santa Fe and Palisade.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Or check out their sedans like the technology packed Elantra and their most advanced Sonata yet.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And the all electric Ioniq 5 and Ioniq 6 are part of the event too.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Every new Hyundai is backed by America's best warranty. That's a 10 year, 100,000 mile powertrain, limited warranty.

[Karen Kilgariff]

You also get three years or 36,000 miles of complimentary maintenance on all 2025 models. Visit HyundaiUSA.com call 562-314-4603 for more details. Offers end September 2, 2025 goodbye.