MFM Minisode 452

Summary

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My Favorite Murder Minisode 452 (September 8, 2025)

Hosts: Karen Kilgariff & Georgia Hardstark
Podcast: My Favorite Murder (Exactly Right and iHeartPodcasts)

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Episode Overview

This lively Minisode delivers listener "hometown" stories with Karen and Georgia's trademark wit and warmth. The duo gives updates on previous episodes, reads fresh tales from fans—covering cult recruitment, meth-fueled horse camps, ghostly encounters, trash sibling mischief, and small-town squirrel obsessions—and revels in the messiness of family folklore and small-town weirdness. The episode blends unsettling true crime with the hosts’ irreverent humor, making both creepy and mundane stories delightful.

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Key Segments, Stories & Insights

1. Story Updates: Animated Baboons and Baboon-Gate

[02:08–05:16]

• Update on YouTube’s Animated Hometown Story:
  • A recent animated story about a little girl being told to retrieve a car mirror from a baboon enclosure sparks debate in the comments.
  • The debate escalates when the daughter of "Diane" (the woman in the story) corrects the record, clarifying:
    • Diane's own daughter (not someone else’s kid) was asked to get the mirror, which was just beside the car.
    • Emily (not Diane's daughter) volunteered, didn’t get the mirror, and a ranger eventually retrieved it.
• Hosts’ Take:
  • They highlight the peak “90s parenting” energy and enjoy the saga’s twists.
  • “Diane, if you could send a video in, we would love to be able to throw to you...” – Karen, [04:51]
• Notable Quote:
  • Georgia: “She kicked someone else's kid out of the car to square off with baboons.” [03:09]
  • Karen: “Who’s side are you on?” [04:34]

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2. Hometown Story: “God the Mother Almost Got Me”

[05:18–08:52]

• Listener Debbie’s Cult Encounter:
  • As a college senior, Debbie is approached by another student inviting her to join a group discussing “God the Mother,” which turns out to be a cult front.
  • Feeling unsafe as the recruiter follows her, Debbie fakes familiarity with a passing male student, who protects her until campus police can help.
  • The next day, news circulates about the cult’s ties to human trafficking.
• Hosts’ Reaction:
  • They praise Debbie’s quick thinking and riff on using this tactic to meet cute guys.
  • “That is how you hit on someone. It doesn’t matter if there’s no one following you. Hey, sir.” – Georgia, [07:51]
• Notable Quote:
  • Debbie (via email): “Stay sexy. And if something seems too good to be true, it probably is. X.O.X.O. – Debbie” [08:45]

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3. Medical Mayhem: “The Animal Botox Doctor”

[08:52–11:11]

• Listener Hannah’s Medical Mystery:
  • Hannah’s grandmother finally finds a doctor who listens to her arthritis complaints—until he disappears.
  • Family discovers the doctor lost his license for experimenting on his own face (and his mother’s) with animal-grade Botox intended for dogs with arthritis.
• Hosts’ Comments:
  • Explosions of disbelief and jokes about animal Botox, their own love of Botox, and the absurd standards for trustworthy doctors.
  • “Who are you mad at in this story? ... They did it to themselves anyway.” – Karen, [10:21]
• Memorable Moment:
  • Family’s lost trust in medicine now rivals the story of grandpa’s McDonald’s brawl with a thrown chair.

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4. Horse Camp Run by Drug Dealers

[12:48–16:48]

• Listener ‘C’s Story:
  • City kid spends summers at a “ranch” that’s actually a bar with horses out back.
  • At “horse camp,” kids are largely unsupervised, learn to mistrust horses (“Horses are dicks”), survive feuds between horses, and realize the camp is a front for the owners’ meth dealing.
  • Camp is ultimately shut down after the owners are arrested for selling drugs out of the bar.
• Hosts’ Impressions:
  • Recollections about their own horse camp experiences, fear of horses, and small-town logic—plus advice to always check your saddle and your camp directors’ criminal records.
  • Georgia: “I’ll never get on a horse. I have a healthy fear of horses and people should for their children, too.” [16:55]

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5. Summer Ghost Story on Cape Cod

[17:34–21:33]

• Listener Ilona’s Tale:
  • Family rents a converted 1826 Methodist church turned artist’s studio in Cape Cod.
  • Every night, Ilona and her sister hear footsteps and creaks from the attic (artist’s abandoned workspace); parents don’t believe them.
  • Later, Ilona’s research reveals two artists died in the house—the second died right before their first summer stay.
  • “Stay sexy and don’t vacation in super haunted abandoned churches turned deceased artist studios.” – Ilona (via email) [21:33]
• Hosts’ Take:
  • They riff on the horror of houses with half-walls and the creepiness of only kids hearing the ghostly activity.
  • Karen: “It’s really creepy that only the kids heard it... Now we know we’re dealing with ghosts.” [21:44]

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6. Squirrel Town, USA

[23:48–26:39]

• Listener Taylor’s Small Town Weirdness:
  • Olean, New York claims “most squirrels in the world" and commissions 28 concrete squirrel statues, each themed for location (Ronald McDonald squirrel, Starry Night squirrel, etc).
  • The project spawns T-shirts, maps, some vandalism and theft (including a concrete money sack from the banker squirrel).
• Hosts’ Joy:
  • Delighted by artists blitzing small towns with weird public art, they compare it to Circleville’s Pumpkin Festival or the cocaine bear.
  • “Can we get artist blitz emails in your small town where artists just ... do a thing overnight?” – Georgia, [25:38]
  • “Stay sexy and don’t steal concrete money from a squirrel.” – Taylor (via email) [26:39]

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7. Trash Siblings & Bat Vindication

[26:54–30:50]

• Listener Emily from Germany:
  • Youngest of five, perpetually doubted by her siblings (“trash siblings”).
  • After weeks of being gaslit about a bat terrorizing her at night, a bat finally materializes in the family room, vindicating her.
  • Family never acknowledges she was right; years later, her trash siblings still deny it.
• Hosts’ Reflections:
  • Both reminisce about sibling pranks and being the baby, with Karen recounting her luck with cigarette machines as a child.
  • Emily ends with a casual reveal: the snake in her bathroom as a kid was a water moccasin, caught by a drunken friend—another near-miss for family disaster.

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Notable Quotes & Moments

| Timestamp | Speaker | Quote / Moment | |-----------|--------------------|---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 03:09 | Georgia | “She kicked someone else's kid out of the car to square off with baboons.” | | 07:51 | Georgia | “That is how you hit on someone. It doesn’t matter if there’s no one following you. Hey, sir.” | | 10:21 | Karen | “Who are you mad at in this story? ... They did it to themselves anyway.” | | 16:55 | Georgia | “I’ll never get on a horse. I have a healthy fear of horses and people should for their children, too.” | | 21:33 | Ilona (listener) | “Stay sexy and don’t vacation in super haunted abandoned churches turned deceased artist studios.” | | 25:38 | Georgia | “Can we get artist blitz emails in your small town where artists just ... do a thing overnight?” | | 26:39 | Taylor (listener) | “Stay sexy and don’t steal concrete money from a squirrel.” |

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Episode Tone & Style

• Warm, irreverent, conversational, and always comedic—balancing the grim with banter and nostalgia.
• Karen and Georgia openly riff, tease, and encourage listeners to send more increasingly wild stories.
• Running jokes about “trash siblings,” elaborate hometowns, and “glam” recording days (complete with fake eyelashes).

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Recurring Themes

• Hometown chaos: Family misadventures, being gaslit by siblings, strange small-town traditions.
• The thin line between weird and dangerous: cults in disguise, sketchy horse camps, wild animal encounters.
• Vindication: Listeners finally proven right about bats, cult recruiters, and bizarre family legends.
• Hosts’ delight in local oddities and listener email creativity.

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Calls to Action

• Send in your own “trash sibling” stories or hometown corrections and updates.
• Check out the podcast’s animated stories and video episodes on YouTube.
• “Stay sexy and don’t get murdered.”

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For fans and new listeners alike, Minisode 452 is a warm, funny, and occasionally chilling collection of true stories that celebrate the weird, the wild, and the wonderfully mundane—all with Karen and Georgia’s unique comedic touch.

Transcript

[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

My sav. Hello and welcome to my favorite murder the Minisode.

[Georgia Hardstark]

We read you your stories and now we update you about your stories and their responses.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That's right. When we do a minisode that is so compelling that Nick Terry doesn't animate it about it.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Go to the exactly right media YouTube.

[Karen Kilgariff]

To watch to watch and then go ahead and read those comments under the baboon animated. We did and there's a lot happening. Do you wanna just kind of like tell people the story if they don't know it? Just ba boom real quick.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Basically the MFM animated that was a hometown was a little girl who they went into like a safari drive through and the mother made the little girl get out and face down the baboons to get their Side mirror back. How was that?

[Karen Kilgariff]

That was perfect, thank you. And then the people spoke. And not only did the people speak in these YouTube comments, Diane's daughter came to defend her honor.

[Georgia Hardstark]

The mother of the daughter who was the little girl was with. It wasn't her kid. She kicked someone else's kid out of the car.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yes.

[Georgia Hardstark]

To square off with baboons.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Diane was like, hey, Emily, you get out and go get that mirror. But that's Emily's side of the story. The plot thickens because Diane's daughter showed up to say Emily didn't really tell that story accurately.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I'm sorry. She came around to say, hot tea.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Coming in really quick. Should we say the shit people were saying in the comments were like peak 90s parenting there? All kids were safe, no thanks to Diane. You know, Diane didn't watch the Omen question mark.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Right. There was a lot of Diane shit talking.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yes.

[Georgia Hardstark]

So here's a comment from Diane's literal daughter. Hi, all, Diane's daughter here. I need to make some corrections to this story as to vindicate Diane. I have taken this recording to my sister and mother and we all agree that Emily has misremembered a few key facts here.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Uh oh.

[Georgia Hardstark]

The first and most important is that my mom asked her daughter to open the door and retrieve the mirror that was sitting directly next to the car door on the ground. That's another little. It wasn't that far away. Yes, I refused as we were being swarmed and attacked by baboons. Baboons, yes, we know that. Secondly, Emily absolutely volunteered to slither out the door to grab it. The baboons did charge and Emily did not get the mirror. Diane eventually drove to the end of the safari and a ranger did grab one mirror that was duct taped to the car for the ride home to PA despite the fact that my mom did ask a literal child to fight for the mirror. She asked her child to do so.

[Karen Kilgariff]

She sacrificed her own child.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah. Whose side are you on?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah, Are you on the initial daughter or the main girl, Emily, who did.

[Georgia Hardstark]

The slithering, who was not the daughter.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Who told a story like she was sent out into a safari park as a child.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Well, clearly we need Diane's side of the story, so she needs to write in.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Diane, if you could send a video in that we would love to be able to throw to you and then. That's right, maybe we talk to you live.

[Georgia Hardstark]

All right, so that's the update on my hometown.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That's right.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Send us your updates for hometown or your side of the Story. We want to know.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I mean, if your hometown has gotten all the way to Nick Terry level and you would like to make a correction or talk about what's real, we're here to entertain any version of reality that's true. That's what we do.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Okay, let's do hometowns. You want to go first?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Sure. The subject line of this email is God the Mother almost got me.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Ooh.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Hi, Karen, Georgia, and fellow Murderinos. I've been a listener since day one. My little sister introduced me to my favorite murder back when we were both working in a plastic factory, trying to save up for college tuition. Oof. That's about as American as you can get. I'm so proud.

[Georgia Hardstark]

1930S.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I mean, hell yes. Did you have to wear those things on your hair?

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Did you have to wear protective goggles?

[Georgia Hardstark]

I hope you wore a mask, because breathing in those particles can't be good for you.

[Karen Kilgariff]

No. And also, were you assembling, like, a little toy?

[Georgia Hardstark]

Aw. A train. Okay, okay.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Right back in and answer all those questions. Your podcast got me through long shifts and hard days, and I've been hooked ever since. After listening to episode 490, I wanted to share a story that still gives me chills. The time I was almost recruited by a cult known as God the Mother.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I remember that documentary.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Picture this. It's 2018. I'm a senior at the University of San Diego, trying to survive my core curriculum. So that means that she made it to college. She got that plastic money, and she got her college tuition.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Amazing.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Good job. One requirement was to take three theology or religion courses.

[Georgia Hardstark]

That's a lot.

[Karen Kilgariff]

What the fuck the Jesuits will get you? Growing up culturally Catholic didn't exactly prepare me for what those professors were throwing at us, and I was desperate to form a study group so I wouldn't totally bomb the class. I was walking alone one evening after dance practice, trying to get home, when a girl about my age smiled and waved me over. She asked, have you heard of God the Mother? At first, I was curious, even a little relieved. I'd been actively looking for a group of study buddies to help me survive this class, and this sounded promising. She explained that the group of mostly women met off campus to discuss matriarchal themes in religion.

[Georgia Hardstark]

All right.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Sounded kind of cool, right? But something felt off.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Fake smile plastered to your face.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Do you want to hear about God the Mother?

[Georgia Hardstark]

Have you met God the Mother?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Now try to smile, but not use your eyes. Have you met God the Mother?

[Georgia Hardstark]

Can't do it.

[Karen Kilgariff]

The more she spoke, the more uneasy I became. The vibe turned from friendly to weirdly intense. I tried to excuse myself, but she started following me around campus.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Oh, no.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That's when I decided to fuck politeness and embarrassment. I spotted a cute guy coming out of the campus store and ran up to him, pretending we know each other. Genius.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Best thing to do.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Thankfully, he caught on immediately and played along. The girl eventually backed off and he stayed with me until campus police arrived and gave me a ride home.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Man, that is how you hit on someone.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That so good?

[Georgia Hardstark]

It doesn't matter if there's no one following you. Hey, sir. Right?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Oh my God.

[Georgia Hardstark]

There's someone following me. Can you protect me?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Hey, will you shop with me at this? Marshalls. There's someone following me.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Me through this. Marshalls.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I stuffed a shirt in my purse earlier. The next day in class, everyone was talking about the news. Apparently this God. The mother group as seen on USD's campus had ties to human trafficking.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Oh, fuck.

[Karen Kilgariff]

They were targeting local college students, especially women, through those supposed study groups that were actually fronts for kidnapping. Holy shit. What? To this day, I think about how close I might have come to becoming one of those stories we all talk about. I've never forgotten a student who helped me or. Or that gut feeling that told me something was wrong.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yes, but what if it had been him who was the problem and she got in his car? I'm sorry, but you just can't trust anyone.

[Karen Kilgariff]

He's like, I'll help you, little girl.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I am God.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I'm also God. The mother. Stay sexy. And if something seems too good to be true, it probably is. X.O.X.O. debbie.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Nice. Yeah, that's good. Good escape. I'm not going to read you the title of this one.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Okay.

[Georgia Hardstark]

It just starts. Hi, Big fan. My incredible grandma who passed.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I'm so sorry, but we didn't explain why we're so glammed up right now.

[Georgia Hardstark]

If you're gonna watch us on YouTube, like, now's the time to start because we look fucking glam and flawless.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I'm wearing fake eyelashes.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I am too. We had a photo shoot just now and we were like, let's film now, because we're never gonna look better.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I thought that'd be a little breadcrumbing for people to come over to the video part.

[Georgia Hardstark]

To the exactly right Media. My favorite murder. YouTube.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Join the fan.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Join the fan. Cold. Whatever.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Get your tour tickets.

[Georgia Hardstark]

My incredible grandma who passed away in 2022 had the most incredible stories. As she got older, she lost her filter and got Progressively sassier.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Hi.

[Georgia Hardstark]

She also had a hard time finding doctors that she liked. Okay, we're set up. After years of looking, she finally found someone that she trusted and could also get along with. What do you think she was like?

[Karen Kilgariff]

I mean, how long are you in a doctor's appointment that you're not getting along with people?

[Georgia Hardstark]

Immediately he took her arthritis seriously and she finally felt like she was making progress. One day, he was just no longer available. Not on the clinic website, canceled appointments, and no one at the clinic would talk about him. Finally, my mom, who was accompanying my grandma to all her appointments, decided to Google him and she found that he had lost his license for all caps. Experimenting with animal grade Botox meant for, like, dogs with arthritis. In his own face and also his mom's face.

[Karen Kilgariff]

No. What? Who are you mad at in this story?

[Georgia Hardstark]

They did it to themselves anyway. I don't know that my grandma ever really trusted another medical professional again, but it was a great addition to the arsenal of incredible stories from my grandparents. Unseating the time my grandpa got kicked out of McDonald's because one of his friends, they were all over 80 at the time, tried to throw a chair at one of the other friends.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Oh, shit.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Oh.

[Karen Kilgariff]

They were like the old man coffee group in McDonald's talking shit.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Aren't their chairs bolted to the ground for that reason? Probably, yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Where are their loose chairs at McDonald's?

[Georgia Hardstark]

This is a questionable story.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Your grandpa lies.

[Georgia Hardstark]

My grandparents were the coolest.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Hannah, Hannah, I'm so sorry what I said about your grandpa. I was lying. I'm the liar here. Wow. I love Botox. Animal Botox.

[Georgia Hardstark]

In your face and in your mom's face.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Just get little whiskers. Can I have it here, here, here and here. And in my pupils, running a business.

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[Georgia Hardstark]

1.

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It's $15 a month.

[Karen Kilgariff]

2.

[Mint Mobile Advertiser]

Seriously, it's $15 a month.

[Karen Kilgariff]

3.

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No big contracts.

[Georgia Hardstark]

4.

[Mint Mobile Advertiser]

I use it.

[Georgia Hardstark]

5.

[Mint Mobile Advertiser]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

New customer offer first three months only, then full price plan options available. Taxes and fees extra.

[Karen Kilgariff]

See mintmobile.com the subject line of this email is horse camp run by drug dealers.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Perfect.

[Karen Kilgariff]

So it just starts. So period. I'm a city girl from Queens, New York who would spend summers in the Catskills visiting my mom's family and generally annoying my father by fighting with my sister. Our usual sibling bonding, but with a forest aesthetic. My sister was obsessed with horses and I was still undecided with them at that point. My dad would take us to a place that claimed to be a ranch when it really was a bar with some horses out back.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I want to go there. Lying to kids just to get them to a bar.

[Karen Kilgariff]

You love it here.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Go over there.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Dad, it's a parking lot. I'm sure this was his place of choice because it was cheap. This summer I was 10. We went on a ride early enough in July from my sister to see their camp flyer. A week long camp where one could learn horsemanship skills. My parents caved to my sister and of course if one of us was going, both of us were going. Horse camp was in fact just a bunch of girls cleaning the stables and running around unsupervised for four hours a day with horses. As a ten year old I learned two things. Number one, horses are dicks. Very true, very true.

[Georgia Hardstark]

They're like worse than cats.

[Karen Kilgariff]

They're so tense and strong and finicky.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Not in a bad way, like good for them, but like what are we trying to do?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Well, and also bad for 9 year old girls who think that they're gonna walk up and touch their cheek and make friends forever.

[Georgia Hardstark]

No, horses don't fucking play that way.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And then they put their head back and they show those huge Veneers.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I have those.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And they eat your apple. I do too. As a 10 year old, I learned two things. One, horses are dicks. Two, it's not called horse camp. Did you know that horses. It's not called horse camp. Did you know that horses who don't like saddles will bloat out their stomachs when you're putting them on?

[Georgia Hardstark]

Cool.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I've told you that story of my cousin Stevie and I riding his horse lady who just walked around in a field free and easy, free range.

[Georgia Hardstark]

She's like, fuck these kids.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Stevie put a saddle on her one day and she blowed it out like this. So I was riding behind him and we just very slowly went all the way over to the side and then fell on the horse.

[Georgia Hardstark]

The horse was laughing so hard about this horse language at you.

[Karen Kilgariff]

She was like, do not try me. I'm not doing this with you. I learned this on day two when trotting and suddenly my whole saddle went sliding sideways on the horse.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Shit.

[Karen Kilgariff]

The amazing part is your feet are in the stirrups, right? So you're going with it.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Crash.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I wish that was the worst of it. But two days later, when on a trail, my horse was bitten by the horse behind me. Horses apparently do this when they have beef and took off into the woods at high speeds. What I had learned at horse camp was echoing through my brain. The lead expert said, day one, if anything happens on your horse and you are scared, all caps. Do not scream. If you scream, it will make things worse. Which is why as I pulled the reins over my head and prayed to the horse gods to make the Sanibel stop, I did not let out a squeak. I waited 20 minutes to be found and jumped off the horse to let out a string of profanities, quite impressive for a 10 year old. And refused to get back on, stating I hate horse camp, only to be told, horses don't go to camp. This is equestrian riding camp. I literally like drop the reins and walk into the river.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Goodbye, float away. Yeah, see ya. See you on the flip, motherfucker.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Now I'm going to rafting camp, right? Once I got home, I learned the next important lesson. Whatever the camp is called, if my dad paid for a full week, I was going back for the full week.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Oh, shit.

[Karen Kilgariff]

After finishing out the week, I. I in fact found a great respect for horses and the knowledge I never wanted to ride one again. My sister went back to this place for years until it was finally shut down because the owners were arrested for selling meth out of the bar. Apparently. Apparently the side hustle of horse camp wasn't enough for them. So remember, always check your horse's saddle before getting on. And maybe check that the camp that you're sending your kids to isn't run by drug dealers.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Wow.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And that's just signed C. Great story.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Because you could have just told us about the meth deal.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Great story. Yeah, that's.

[Georgia Hardstark]

That was great. And I also. I'll never get on a horse. I'm personally like, I have a healthy fear of horses and I think people should for their children too.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Like, it takes one gardener snake to spook a horse.

[Karen Kilgariff]

The problem is with us farm people, we love being on horses. And I went to horse camp with my friend Jennifer Gearing and most of those things happen to me. And we were taught vaulting, which is when you run beside the horse and jump onto it.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Don't do that.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And like we had to do a show at the end to show people we could do it.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Book camp. Book and cat camp.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Sounds cool. They must have that.

[Georgia Hardstark]

They must.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That's called the public library.

[Georgia Hardstark]

That's true.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Okay, get a library card.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Grandma's house.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Get a library card.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Get a library card. Here is a 30 plus year old summer ghost story. Ooh, hey, Karen and Georgia. Not a day one listener, but so glad I found you when I did. The sound of your voices keeps me sane on a daily basis. An escape from the shit show we call reality in 2025.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Fuck yeah, baby. Stay san.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Today I was listening to Minisode 441 and you asked for summer ghost stories. Yes, because we're like, anyone can tell a winter ghost story. Is it? But we're like, is Arizona haunted? Because it's hot.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Oh, right.

[Georgia Hardstark]

So there must not be ghost stories. Do you have a, like summer. Okay, we did that. I thought about sending this story in several times before, but your specific call for summer ghost stories finally gave me the kick in the ass I needed to write this all down.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Finally.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Every summer as a kid, we would do a two week family vacation on Cape Cod. Sounds amazing, Rich. We rented. We rented various houses over the years, but there was one in particular that we returned to several years in a row, starting in the summer of 1991 when I was 12. Built in 1826 as a Methodist church, the house was essentially one cavernous open space with a few flimsy half walls added in to create bedroom areas.

[Karen Kilgariff]

The worst, because if those walls don't go all the way up to the ceiling, you can hear your Parents fucking, I mean. Or just anybody farting. I mean, like, it's the worst.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Okay. Above the living space was the kind of attic that just gives you the chills the moment you put your foot on the stairs. Yeah, Cape Cod's probably so haunted.

[Karen Kilgariff]

So it's all those sailors. Fisherman. Yes.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Pirates. The attic was set up as an artist studio. From what I understood, the artist had died and his children wanted it to remain completely untouched. Paintbrushes and canvases were still laid out as if he would return at any moment. Most nights, my sister and I would hear noises coming from the attic. It sounded like heavy footsteps and creaking floorboards. I tried to never be the last one awake at night, but sometimes all I could do was lay there waiting for the first terrifying creak.

[Karen Kilgariff]

You're trying to rush off to sleep.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah, you're like, ambient, ambient, ambient.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Get me out of here. I've got to go.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Sometimes the footsteps would wake me up at midnight. My sister and I would often run to each other's beds, and she's seven years older than I am, so I knew I wasn't crazy. I or wake our parents when we got too freaked out. My way too chill. Dad would always explain it away as probably a squirrel in the walls. They never heard a thing, and I don't think they believe us to this day. I've thought of the house often since then. Last December, after a visit with my parents, who eventually bought a house. Not that one, thank God, and retired to Cape Cod, I started doing a deep dive on the history of the house. No one remembered the address, but I found it by digging through Google Maps and online historical archives.

[Karen Kilgariff]

So satisfying.

[Georgia Hardstark]

In 1925, an artist named C. Arnold Slade purchased the abandoned 1826 Methodist Meeting House and had it dismantled and reconstructed on Savage Point, the blustery hilltop location of his home and compound of cottages.

[Karen Kilgariff]

He took basically, a Methodist church and moved it and rebuilt it somewhere else.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Put it back up. Yeah. That's like begging to be haunted. The church was turned into a studio and exhibition space where Slade displayed copies of his iconic war paintings as his current portraits and New England landscapes. Slade's summer rental cottages and quirky church studio became known as Sladeville. When slade died in 1961, his wife sold Sladeville to an artist, Peter Hooven. Hooven lived in the house and used the attic as his studio in his death. Do you wanna guess what year? Yep, you guessed it. 1991. The summer we started renting there.

[Karen Kilgariff]

What?

[Georgia Hardstark]

So the second artist died the year they started and Then they were like, whoop, let's bring in this family for a vacay.

[Karen Kilgariff]

They were the next ones in.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah, and he died there. He died young, only 57 years old, and all of my Internet sleuthing has brought zero answers about how he passed. I now have no doubt that there was at least one, if not two spirits inhabiting the space above us all those nights. Plus churches in Massachusetts in the 1820s. Probably lots more spooky shit there.

[Karen Kilgariff]

For sure.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah, stay sexy and don't vacation in super haunted abandoned churches turned deceased artist studios. I can't believe I got that Ilona she her?

[Karen Kilgariff]

It's really creepy that only the kids heard it.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Oh, for sure.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That's like well, now we know we're dealing with ghosts.

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[Karen Kilgariff]

The subject line of my last email is welcome to Squirrel Town, usa. Hi, friends. Is that too presumptuous? It feels right. That's in parentheses and then it says Olean, New York is about 1.5 hours south of Buffalo and for some reason believes it has the most squirrels in the world. There's absolutely no way they could know this, but I think just one squirrel.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Running, he's just everywhere all at once.

[Karen Kilgariff]

So busy.

[Georgia Hardstark]

He's amped up.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah, there's absolutely no way that they could know this, but I think they needed something to cling onto so that they could feel important. For whatever reason, squirrels were the answer.

[Georgia Hardstark]

We all need something.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah. And squirrels work. This got extremely out of hand when one day I was in high school and I awoke to the news that someone had planted 28 four foot tall concrete statues of squirrels around the city. And then all caps, 28. Each was painted differently to represent either where it was placed or just whatever the hell the artist felt like doing. For example, there was a Ronald McDonald one outside of McDonald's. A Ronald McDonald's squirrel? No, there was a banker outside the bank until someone stole the concrete sack of money it was holding and then they had to move it inside. A Starry Night one for shits and gigs. Oh, it's Van Gogh. Starry Night Squirrel, A Wizard of Oz 1 and 1 just titled hey mom, guess what? That's dedicated to the troops. That might be a reference.

[Georgia Hardstark]

That might be personal.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah, true. Our chamber of commerce had everything when it came to squirrel swag, including T shirts that said peace Love squirrels, ornaments, card games, maps on where you find all of them, and you guessed it, a squirrel calendar.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Wow.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Since it's a small town and people got bored, a lot of these have been vandalized or stolen.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Of course. I love an artist blitz. Can we get artists blitz emails in your small town where artists just fucking do a thing overnight and you're like.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That felt like it was like city commissioned, like they've kind of forced it.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I hope they asked for the public to vote on the money. How much did that cost? Okay, go on.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I don't know. Yeah, we'd like a full cost report, please, immediately. So, lost or stolen, vandalized or stolen, which honestly good for them for running off with those. Cause they probably were heavy as fuck. But we definitely still have enough to live up to our name. To this day I have no idea who Green lent this project or if they're now gallivanting around to other towns pitching these ideas. I escaped Squirrel Hell USA and now live in Denver with my husband and dog, Butter. Aw, Butter.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Butter's a good dog name.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I turned my husband into a murderino early on and now almost every time we're in the car he says, can we listen to murder? And I turn on the most recent episode, mfm. Oh, that's beautiful. A drag along. Stay sexy and don't steal concrete money from a squirrel Taylor.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Wow.

[Karen Kilgariff]

She did it.

[Georgia Hardstark]

She did it.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I love that report also because that's a little bit of like. It feels like the Circleville Pumpkin Festival vibe.

[Georgia Hardstark]

That yeah, for sure. Or the cocaine bear. You know what I mean?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah. We want to know what's going on in your town.

[Georgia Hardstark]

This is our thing.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah, we love it.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Leave us alone. Or come by and say hi.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Or come by.

[Georgia Hardstark]

My last one is a trash siblings story. But it's so, so funny. Hi. I just listened to Minisode 443 about the snake in the bathroom. Remember the little kid put the snake in his sister's bath when she was in the bath? And remember that I too have experienced a snake in the bathroom. But that's not what this story is about. Because when the writer said that her four year old brother put the snake in the bathroom, I immediately murmured trash siblings. And the quotes are like this where one's up, you know.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Trash siblings.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Sure to myself. And it unlocked a long forgotten memory like open sesame. So here we go.

[Karen Kilgariff]

This is such a good idea. Trash siblings. I just wanna say this. And my sister loves to tell this story. I used to have this magical gift when I was like around five or six and my parents would be like at a restaurant with their friends and we had to entertain ourselves in basically like an old Italian dark restaurant.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah, in the like entryway.

[Karen Kilgariff]

In the entryway.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Stay out of everyone's way.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Play with the cigarette machine. Every time I pulled, I would get a pack of cigarettes every single time. That to me is a good trash sibling story where my sister had to take me to the bathroom. It's like, well, I'll take you by to cigarette machine and see what happens.

[Georgia Hardstark]

You scored big on the cigarette machine. So here we go. I am the youngest of five siblings all born three years apart in the 70s and 80s. You can make your own Assumptions about my parents parenting style. Was I forgotten at the grocery store more than once? Absolutely. Did I sit in the way, way back of the station wagon without a seatbelt? Sure did.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah.

[Georgia Hardstark]

As the youngest of five, I was generally expected to tag along and try not to get myself killed. So when I woke up one morning and told my family that a bat attacked me in my sleep, they immediately brushed it off when I insisted that all caps. A bat was in my room. It flew down, landed on my head and flew away. They simply gaslit me and told me that I was dreaming. This went on for weeks and not a single sibling believed me. Trash, exclamation mark. Well, what do you know? A few weeks later, while we were all in the family room watching a movie, a fucking bat flew in. Hell yeah. Like finally he's making his fucking entrance, letting everyone know he's not a ghost bat and I'm not.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I love it. It's like everybody else is gonna have their bat reaction and they're just like.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Oh, we're friends already.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Oh, this old thing that you said didn't exist.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Danny. He and I are friends.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah. And you guys are so scared.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Danny the bat and I go way back and I've literally been telling you about it.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That's right. No, no, you're dreaming.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I wish I had a better name than Danny. Oh, well, let's just try it again. What about like Herbert? Herbert the bats.

[Karen Kilgariff]

What about.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Cuz it would be Bat. Bert the bat.

[Karen Kilgariff]

There we go. You see how it just puts it right up there?

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah. Bert the Bat. There we go. We did it.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah, I like that we were talking like that. Like it's gonna get cut out or something.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Never. Okay. A fucking bat fluid. My dad immediately tried to catch it while we all squealed. And my mom looked for something to put it in if my dad in fact did catch it. And me, I just sat there like the smug little kid I was because I fucking told you so. Yes, we never did catch the bat and assumed it eventually died in the attic or flew out one of the windows. Gross. To this day, my siblings still say that there was never a bat, even though they saw it with their own eyes. I'm now in my late 30s, in what I would consider to be a full grown adult. But to my siblings, I will always be the baby. Sigh. Thank you for being the soundtrack to my life. I've been listening since the very beginning and I'm so grateful to have your steady voices in my life. Stay sexy and just accept being the youngest we can't no, we won't.

[Karen Kilgariff]

We can't.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Emily. Hi. From Germany. P.S. the snake in my bathroom was a water moccasin. Pretty dangerous and scary. Weeks of sleep was lost until the snake was found by a drunken friend who grabbed it and threw it in the pillowcase. Oh, to be young and dumb. So we got snakes, we got bats.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That whole backstory, and then they just touch a water moccasin story and leave.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Are they. Are they bad guys?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Emily?

[Georgia Hardstark]

I don't know. Water moccasins.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Oh, they're completely poisonous. They kill you.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Oh, shit.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah, those are bad ones. Jesus, Emily. Well, victory, What a victorious email that was.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Send us your trash sibling stories, whatever you think that means, whatever it means to your heart and to your soul.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And I think the burden of being the youngest sibling stories can go on forever.

[Georgia Hardstark]

You need them.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I mean, I got used to being like, tied up in a sleeping bag to be tortured, but I was like, I'm gonna like it. And I just sit in the sleeping bag in the dark, like I can breathe. I'm fine.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I never thought of that twisteroo of like, I'm enjoying myself.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yep, that's the only way you can get em.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Well, thanks for enjoying yourself, everyone, for listening. Yeah, and stay sexy and don't get murdered. Goodbye, Elvis. Do you want a cookie?

[Karen Kilgariff]

This has been an Exactly Right production.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Our senior producers are Alejandra Keck and Molly Smith.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Our editor is Aristotle Acevedo.

[Georgia Hardstark]

This episode was mixed by Leona Squillace.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Email your hometowns to my favorite murdermail.com.

[Georgia Hardstark]

And follow the show on Instagram at my favorite murder.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Listen to my favorite murder on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Georgia Hardstark]

And now you can watch us on exactly right's YouTube page. And while you're there, please like and subscribe.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Goodbye.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Goodbye.

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