MFM Minisode 467

Summary

My Favorite Murder Minisode 467

Podcast: My Favorite Murder with Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark
Episode Date: December 22, 2025
Episode Type: Minisode (Listener-submitted "hometown" and holiday stories)

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Episode Overview

This holiday themed minisode brings classic MFM energy as Karen and Georgia read listener-submitted stories with a focus on weird, hilarious, and occasionally chilling holiday tales. True to the spirit of "My Favorite Murder," the episode blends dark humor, honest reflection, and that sense of community for all those who consider themselves "adorable creeps." Expect tales of unexpected crime connections, Christmas mishaps, accidental revelations, and holiday chaos.

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Key Discussion Points and Listener Stories

1. Christmas at John List's House (03:34)

• Listener Shannon writes in about her family's strange proximity to the infamous John List murders in Westfield, NJ.
  • Her father grew up near the List family, whose children he walked to school with.
  • The family once took a Christmas card photo in the List's yard, just before the murders.
  • Shannon's response: “I’m spiraling and tearing through family photo albums trying to find it and my dad’s just like, ‘Huh, weird.’” (04:37)
  • Bonus twist: Years later, Shannon learns she was monitored as an embryo at a fertility clinic by Melanie McGuire (“the suitcase murderer”).
    • Mother’s reaction: “He was handsome, but not murdering-your-husband handsome.”
  • Karen: "At least two [creepy true-crime] connections." (05:46)

2. Christmas Pinata of Terror (05:47)

• Listener Kayla shares a Mexican family Christmas gone wrong in 1993.
  • Pinata time moves into the garage due to rain.
  • Drunk Uncle Daniel throws a box of tools—nails, screws, hammers, locks—onto the group of candy-grabbing kids.
  • Screams and bruises ensue; one cousin gets hit in the head with a giant lock.
  • The family now laughs about it — “like most Mexican family, horrible moments, they get turned into the funniest moments to share.” (07:49)
  • Georgia and Karen hilariously analyze what Uncle Daniel could possibly have been thinking:
    • Georgia: “What would the positive thing have been in a fucking garage?” (08:34)
    • Karen: “He thought there were boxes of confetti or... Tootsie Rolls?” (08:28)

3. The Ghost of Christmas Future Goes Down (13:44)

• Listener Betsy recounts the chaos of a homeschooling field trip to “A Christmas Carol.”
  • At the climactic graveyard scene, the actor playing the Ghost of Christmas Future falls off the stage into the orchestra pit, exclaiming “What the fuck?” over the theater mic (16:01).
    • Result: Ghost gets a concussion, French horn player cracks two ribs.
    • House lights up; theater staff arrive; kids sit in traumatized silence.
    • Betsy: “For many of them, their silence might have been the shock and trauma of hearing the F word for the first time.” (16:57)
  • Karen and Georgia riff on theater mishaps and the scariness of the Grim Reaper falling on you:
    • Georgia: “A resigned, ‘what the fuck?’ is so much better than just a ‘fuck.’” (17:02)

4. Two Ornaments, One Divorce (17:58)

• Listener Paige tells a “trash kid” preschool tale from December 1996.
  • The holiday assignment: make one Christmas ornament “for the pair.”
  • Paige, wanting double the crafting, tells her teacher her parents are divorcing so she can make two gifts.
  • The teacher takes it seriously, prompting a shocked mom pick-up.
  • Karen: “It’s kind of a good brag story about yourself... I was a pretty smart, precocious four year old. Here’s my trash kid story: I was a liar.” (20:03)
  • Karen shares a similar lie from college for sympathy grades (20:25).

5. Childhood Magic with a (Stolen) Twist (24:03)

• Anonymous listener realizes in college that her family’s tradition of going out at night to cut down Christmas trees involved sneaking into the woods (possibly a tree farm) without headlights to “steal” them.
  • Her parents’ defense years later: since dad later worked at a tree farm, “it was basically even.” (25:40)
  • Karen: “I still laugh how sincere. My parents are strong, resourceful people who would do anything to make sure that we had joyful memories, even if those memories came with a bit of a misdemeanor.” (26:08)
  • Karen and Georgia debate the likelihood of public lands vs. raiding a farm.

6. Santa… or Satan? (27:14)

• Listener Lara describes the year her dyslexic, slightly inebriated father-in-law labeled the family’s gifts “FROM SATAN” instead of “Santa.”
  • Her spouse, at age 7 or 8, realized the truth about Santa Claus when his gifts were suspiciously from Satan.
  • Georgia: “Satan? Love it. A drunk dad being like, ‘There you go. Satan. Have fun.’” (28:34)
  • Karen: “That’s how he gets you!” (28:10)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “My dad’s just like, ‘Huh, weird,’ and goes back to watching the Yankees game.” – Listener Shannon (04:37)
• “She just liked the tree. No one thought anything of it. Meanwhile, I’m spiraling...” – Shannon (04:37)
• “Remember to stay sexy and don’t throw a box of tools on children during a pinata.” – Kayla (08:11)
• “What was the best outcome he was expecting?” – Georgia (08:51)
• “The ghost of Christmas Future... went over the edge with the very loud ‘What the fuck?’ in their headset mic.” – Betsy (16:01)
• “For many of them, their silence might have been the shock and trauma of hearing the F word for the first time.” – Betsy (16:57)
• “My brilliant four-year-old ass decided to make up an elaborate ruse… for the sole reason of getting to all caps make two Christmas ornaments.” – Paige (19:27)
• “Stay sexy and don’t get caught stealing spruces.” – Anonymous (26:09)
• “My mother-in-law asked, ‘Who’s that one from?’ My spouse: ‘Um… Satan.’” – Lara (28:03)
• “That’s how he gets you.” – Karen (28:10)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• 03:23 — Karen introduces first listener hometown holiday story.
• 03:34 — Christmas card photo at John List’s house (Shannon’s story).
• 05:47 — Christmas Pinata of Terror (Kayla’s story).
• 13:44 — Shit adult story: Ghost of Christmas Future tumbles off the stage (Betsy’s story).
• 17:58 — Trash kid story: Tree ornament divorce hoax (Paige’s story).
• 24:03 — Childhood Magic with a Stolen Twist (tree theft, anonymous).
• 27:14 — Trash dad story: Dyslexic dad & “From Satan” gifts (Lara’s story).
• 28:44 — Karen and Georgia thank listeners and encourage more crazy holiday submissions.

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Episode Tone & Community Feel

Karen and Georgia keep things conversational, warm, and irreverent, highlighting the weirdness and humanity of holiday family stories. The hosts riff off each other and the stories, providing empathy, catharsis, and plenty of laughs, especially about the comedic horror of childhood mishaps, family chaos, and criminal traditions.

The episode closes with the familiar call to action for listeners to send in more stories and the iconic sign-off, “Stay sexy and don’t get murdered.” (29:00)

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Summary at a Glance

• Main theme: Hilarious, bizarre, and sometimes darkly relatable listener stories about holiday mishaps, family misadventures, and true crime connections—with Karen and Georgia’s signature warmth and wit.
• Notable/standout storylines: Christmas at a murder house, pinata disaster, the cursing Ghost of Christmas Future, a clever kid’s Christmas divorce lie, the revelation of secret tree theft, and gifts confusingly “from Satan.”
• Listener invitation: Write in your own best/worst holiday or hometown stories to join the MFM community in an ongoing celebration of the weird and the wonderful.

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SSDGM forever!

Transcript

[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

Hello and welcome to my favorite murder, the Minisode. We read you our stories.

[Karen Kilgariff]

This is a holiday episode. Do you want to hear your holiday emails?

[Georgia Hardstark]

Go. Why don't you go first?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Okay. The subject line of this is Christmas card photos at John List's house. Hi, Karen in Georgia, longtime listener, first time writer. I've been listening since I was 16. And then it says scary in parentheses. I've got a hometown story for you that gives me chills. But my dad could not care less. My dad and his four brothers grew up in Morristown, New Jersey in the early 1970s. They spent a lot of time visiting their cousins in Westfield, who, it turns, lived just three houses down from the List family. Their three oldest cousins were the same ages as the List children and even walked to school with them. I've known about the Westfield connection for a while and always brought it up as a creepy little family fun fact. I've even said how much I wish my great aunt and uncle were still alive so I could pick their brains. They were there when it all happened, but it wasn't until this past week, while I was talking about it again, that my dad suddenly goes, oh, yeah, I think we actually took a Christmas card photo in their yard once. Excuse me. What? He then remembered that my grandma had taken their Christmas card photo in the front yard of the List house right before the murders. There was this big tree branch that curved low to the ground, and she had all five boys ages 8 to 1, sit on it. She just liked the tree. No one thought anything of it. Meanwhile, I'm spiraling and tearing through family photo albums trying to find it, and my dad's just like, huh, weird. And goes back to watching the Yankees game. And because apparently my entire life is an MFM plotline, I was also confused via IVF. And years later, we found out that Melanie McGuire, the suitcase murderer, was a nurse at the fertility clinic. She was one of the people monitoring my embryo's development. She was also allegedly in love with the doctor my mom upon hearing this, just shook her head and said, he was handsome, but not murdering your husband handsome. So, yeah, I was literally watched over by a murderer during my earliest stages of development. That's a little dramatic. Watched over when you're an embryo and somehow turned out kind of normal. I guess my love of true crime started at day zero. Thanks for letting weirdos like me feel seen, heard, and only mildly cursed. SSDGM forever. Shannon.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Wow. Couple of connections.

[Karen Kilgariff]

At least two.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Okay. My first one's called Christmas Pinata of Terror. Hello, MFM beautiful ladies. I am a pretty new listener, but just like anything new that I enjoy, I am now obsessed. I even fall asleep listening sometimes. And let me tell you, I've had some weird dreams. I thought I'd share just one of my family stories that always gets talked about when we reunite. Hope you enjoy as much as we do this horrid memory. The year is 1993 in Oceanside, California at my abuelita's house on Christmas Eve. We are a big Mexican family. My abuela had seven children and in total, 19 grandchildren. Well, at this point, there were only about 11 of us. Most of us under the age of eight. I was five.

[Karen Kilgariff]

11 kids under the age of eight. Yeah, that's intense.

[Georgia Hardstark]

That's too many.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That's a grammar school, basically.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah. Like most Mexican families, we celebrate with a big party on Christmas Eve that lasts all night with lots of food, music, and of course, booze. Well, on this Christmas Eve, we had a pinata to celebrate. But as it was winter and raining outside, the adults decided to have the pinata in the garage like usual. Every kid took turns trying to break the pinata, and once they couldn't, the bigger cousins took their turns. If you've ever been at the moment when a pinata breaks, all hell breaks loose. We were all screaming with excitement and jumping to try and grab all the candy scattered on the floor. Well, at this very excited moment, my uncle Daniel, who was the youngest of the 7 and 20 years old at this time and also quite intoxicated, thought it would be a hilarious idea to grab a random box of stuff on a shelf in my abuela's garage and toss it on top of all the children who are head down, scattered on the floor, grabbing candy, nails. What he didn't know at the time was that this particular box was filled with nails.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Oh, I guessed it.

[Commercial Announcer 2]

Sorry.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Did I not do that?

[Georgia Hardstark]

No, I like it.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Okay. Okay.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Nails, screws, hammers, wrenches, and heavy duty locks.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Oh, shit.

[Georgia Hardstark]

This is trash.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Uncle, it's so much worse than nails. It's so much heavier and more dangerous than nails.

[Georgia Hardstark]

It's so bad.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It's so bad. And drunk uncle.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yes, you can imagine cheers of joys turned into cries and screams from all us kids. My cousin who was four was holding his head crying because a giant lock had landed straight on it. We all ran to our parents with our bruises and my aunts and uncles were yelling at my drunk uncle who was confused and also feeling so terrible. Just like most Mexican family, horrible moments, they get turned into the funniest moments to share. Now that we are all in our 30s and 40s. Hope you laugh as much as I do every time I remember my drunk uncle ruining Christmas. Remember to stay sexy and don't throw a box of tools on children during a pinata. Your fan Kayla Kayla, it's almost like.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Your uncle thought that in that garage there were boxes of confetti or like boxes of Tootsie Rolls.

[Georgia Hardstark]

What could, what would the positive thing have been in a fucking garage? Nothing.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It's just the idea of it would be funny if his other 20 year old friends were doing it. Because then it's like a box of whatever, right? But a four year old, that's like you hit me in the head with a master lock, right?

[Georgia Hardstark]

Like what was the best outcome he was expecting? Like push pins even like what could.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Have been okay in a garage setting. Earplugs. Styrofoam earplugs would have been even then.

[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

Goodbye.

[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

I am wearing my gray Quint sweater right now.

[Georgia Hardstark]

You love them.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It's such a. Because it's like it just got cold in la, which means we're all acting like it's Alaska.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Right.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And that kind of thing where it's like you throw something on. You like the look of it. I think I've had this thing for five years.

[Georgia Hardstark]

You want to look classy and not just like you're wearing whatever, Right?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Exactly. It's like it's cashmere without the fuss. It's like a really well made sweater. But then it's like the coziness of cashmere.

[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Georgia Hardstark]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

Goodbye. This is insane. I'm not gonna read you the subject line. The good thing is that these are holiday stories where it's like holidays are made for fuck.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Ups. Like.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That. It's the best. Here's another one. Hello there all you bright young things. Been listening to you Lovely Ladies since 2018. Love all you do for this community of adorable creeps as well as the many other things you do for those in need. In parentheses it says I'm Actually, the Instagram commenter who told you the story of my son and I when I was unhoused and living in a truck. Remember that? Oh.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Wow. Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah. This is her. I'd love to share my shit adult story with you. As this revolves around a theater performance, let me set the scene for you. For several years, I headed up a field trip for homeschooled children. Yes, I was trying to socialize them, but they mostly remained stubbornly and gloriously weird. I finally handed the reins of the group over to a more capable mom with seven kids, as I was woefully unqualified with only a homeschool starter pack of five children. Oh, my God. It's not a.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Contest.

[Karen Kilgariff]

No. Thankfully, today, after 21 years of homeschooling, these days of tearing my hair out over fourth grade grammar lessons and begging my kids to put on pants are behind me now. Hope it was worth it. One December, I was able to secure our group tickets to a local production of A Christmas Carol that was putting on a special matinee for elementary students. Happily, Dickens was an acceptable topic even for my most conservative group members. So off we went, congesting the city's traffic flow with dozens of eight passenger vans. It's really specific. We were all thoroughly enjoying the play. The actors were excellent. The live orchestra playing in the pit were performing brilliantly. We arrived at one of the seminal moments in Ebenezer Scrooge's moral arc, the graveyard scene. Scrooge encounters his own tombstone under the bony finger of the ghost of Christmas Future, played by an actor dressed in a Grim Reaper style hood and cape. Just as Scrooge began to beg the specter to tell him how to prevent such evil prognostications, the ghost of Christmas Future, hood shrouding their face, floated ominously towards the front of the stage and immediately went over the edge with the very loud what the fuck? In their headset mic. They crashed into the orchestra pit, where all manner of instruments clattered and.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Banged. Oh, my.

[Karen Kilgariff]

God. Fell into the.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Pit. Oh, my.

[Karen Kilgariff]

God. The specter had landed on the French horn player, the house lights went up and the theater staff appeared on stage. They asked that all the students remain quietly in their seats while they peered down at the carnage in the orchestra pit. An ambulance. The ghost of Christmas Future had a concussion, and the French horn player had cracked two.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Ribs. Oh, my.

[Karen Kilgariff]

God. I so. It's so.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Awful.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah. Have you seen the video of Kelsey Grammer falling off the.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Stage?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah. He's like, acting and then he just, like, run False move. It's so awful, it's so violent. But I doubt anything will ever be as horrifying to him as looking up and seeing what appeared to be the Grim Reaper falling on him. To our kids credit, the theater manager said we were the best behaved group of children they'd ever had. Oh, for many of them, though, their silence might have been the shock and trauma of hearing the F word for the first time. Ooh, fun in a house.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Mic. Yes, a resigneding, what the fuck is so much better than just a.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Fuck? I think those kids learned far more than we intended that day. Maybe there's no correlation, but I was deposed as group leader soon after. Stay sexy and don't yell WTF to an audience of 300 homeschoolers.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Betsy, that's.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Good. So.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Good. And like, he had his mask on so he, like, never got in trouble for it. Probably. Like no one is ever gonna.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Right? He. It's not really.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Him. It's.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Anonymous. Of course Death is gonna say fuck in front of your kids for the first.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Time. He's falling off the fucking.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Stage. He's Death who's dying. That's the scary, the scariest. One time I was in Oliver and the guy that played the Artful Dodger had this big long coat on. And during his, like, song, I can't remember what the song was, he turned to, like, dramatically turned to the rest of the, you know, orphans or whatever. And he had a bag of M and Ms. In his pocket that just sprayed in an arc across the stage where I was like, oh, this is bad. Like watching.

[Georgia Hardstark]

It. If that came out of a pinata, that would be fucking.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Hilarious. That would have fixed.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Christmas. That's right. Not out of coat. Okay, this is a trash kid story. Hiya, earthlings. Trash kids unite. It's December 1996, and I was a wee four year old trying to make my way in the world. Preschool was wild and we were tasked with making a Christmas ornament for our parents, but only one for the pair. But how will that work? I have newly divorced parents and I can't possibly choose between the two. My teacher understands my predicament and kindly lets me make two ornaments. Here comes the end of the day and Tammy, the mother of all mothers, comes to pick up her daughter, me. And the teacher pulls her aside. Ms. Tracy says, Tammy, I'm so sorry to hear that you and Doug are getting a divorce. We had no idea. And he didn't say a thing during drop off this morning. Tammy is stunned and says, excuse me. And thought to herself, when I left the house this morning, everything was fine. He gave me a kiss goodbye and told me he loved.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Me. Oh.

[Georgia Hardstark]

No. Ms. Tracy says. Well, Paige let us know this morning that Doug has packed up his stuff in boxes by the front door and things are not working out, so he's leaving tonight. She insisted that she make Christmas presents for both of you since he will be alone for Christmas this year. And then alarm bells started going off. My brilliant four year old ass decided to make up an elaborate ruse and tell my teachers that my parents were getting a divorce. And my father has packed his bags to move in with my grandparents for the sole reason of getting to all caps make two Christmas ornaments. She's like pretty.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Brilliant. She's about.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Quantity. That's about quality, not right. I can only make one. How about I make up an elaborate.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Lie? But I just pulled together whatever it will take to get me a second.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Ornament. But, like, believable enough to an adult that it.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Worked. And a four year.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Old.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah. Giving you those details of like, his bags are.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Packed. Yeah, it's pretty smart. How did they know that was the thing? Much to Tammy's delight, her husband was there when we got home and confirmed they are not getting a divorce. They've been married for 37 years and are my favorite people in the world. SSDGM.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Paige. I mean, epic. Just an epic. It's kind of a good brag story about yourself. You're like, I was a pretty smart, precocious four year.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Old. Here's my trash kid story. I was a.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Liar. But imagine if that woman really was finding out that she was getting divorced through her, oh my God, like preschool teacher. What a way to.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Go. What are your terrible divorce stories? How'd you find out you were getting a.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Divorce? I did lie in college and told my math teacher that I had been skipping class because my parents were getting a.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Divorce. Oh.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Wow. Because I just wanted her to leave me alone. But then as I walked away from that conversation, I was like, oh, that was. That was a bad vibe to.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Do. This feels.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Bad. It all felt so bad. Yeah, every car has that one cup holder full of coins and then maybe some slightly melted hard candy with.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Acorns. You can take that spare change and put it to use by investing in your.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Future. Acorns is the financial wellness app that cares about where your money is going. And with the Acorns potential screen, you can see what your money is capable.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Of. The Acorns potential screen shows you the power of compounding and how your money could grow over time. Time plus you can adjust how much you're investing to make sure you're building towards your goals. Sign up now and Acorns will boost your new account with a five dollar.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Bonus. Investment join the over 14 million all time customers who have already saved and invested over $27 billion with.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Acorns. Head to acorns.com mfm or download the Acorns app to get.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Started. Paid non client endorsement compensation provides incentive to positively promote Acorns tier 2.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Compensation provided potential subject to various factors such as customers accounts, age and investment settings. Does not include Acorns fees. Results do not predict or represent the performance of any Acorns portfolio. Investment results will.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Vary. Investing involves risk Acorns Advisors, LLC, an SEC registered investment advisor. View important [e-mail] MFM Goodbye taking.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Care of our mental health usually ends up at the bottom of the to do.

[Karen Kilgariff]

List. It's somewhere between cleaning out the junk drawer and going to the post office. Or basically it isn't going to.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Happen. But Talkspace makes it easy to fit therapy into your.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Life. Talkspace is the number one rate online therapy provider bringing you professional support from licensed therapists and psychiatrists that you can access anytime.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Anywhere. Talkspace is also in network it's covered by most insurers and most insured members pay a copay of.

[Karen Kilgariff]

$0. Talkspace is affordable even if you pay out of pocket. Part of the mission of Talkspace is to provide quality care that's accessible and affordable whether or not you're.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Insured. You can switch providers at no extra cost, so you'll be sure to find a licensed provider that fits your.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Needs. Here's why I love Talkspace because they're making it actually affordable for people in 2025. Very important these.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Days. We need it the most now and we can't afford it the most.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Now. So let's fucking do it. Yeah, let's get it all covered by our insurance and then let's get some.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Therapy. As a listener of this podcast, you'll get $80 off your first month with Talkspace when you go to talkspace.com mfm and enter promo code.

[Karen Kilgariff]

SPACE80. That's S P A C E 80. To match with the licensed therapist today, go to talkspace.com mFM and enter promo code.

[Georgia Hardstark]

SPACE80. Goodbye. Your pet is your best friend, your therapist and your unpaid.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Intern. So don't just feed them, fuel them with Hill's Pet.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Nutrition. Hills is backed by science to support whole body health in dogs and.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Cats. As a leader in science Led Nutrition, Hills supports lean muscles, which are essential for everything your pet does, whether that's the Zoomies, Squirrel Patrol or occasionally knocking something over. Hill's Science Led Nutrition helps you give more love than humanly possible because you're only.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Human. There's Hills Science does more. Find the right [e-mail] iheart.

[Commercial Announcer 1]

Goodbye. So you're telling me that the AI that's meant to make everyone's job easier to manage just adds more to manage? On top of the thousands of apps the IT department already manages? Funny how that works. Any business can add AI. IBM helps you scale and manage AI to change how you do business. Let's create Smile to Business.

[Karen Kilgariff]

IBM. Here's my last one. This subject line is Childhood Magic with a twist. Hi ladies. First off, thank you for everything you do, especially for advocating mental health awareness and for the life changing mantra Fuck politeness. As a woman raised to keep things buttoned up and ladylike, this advice has been a game changer. It's helped me grow into a badass mom who teaches her daughter to speak up, trust her gut, and take up space unapologetically. Now onto my hometown ish holiday tale. I've been listening since the beginning and it's never occurred to me that this story might fall squarely into your. Wait, what category? Did you know that was a.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Category? No, but I love.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It. Wait, what? Back in the 80s, when I was five or six, money was tight for our family like it was for a lot of people, but my parents always went all out to make the holidays feel magical. One of our most sacred traditions was piling into the family truck after dark to go get the Christmas tree. We'd bundle up, drive deep into the woods, and be told very seriously to stay quiet. Then, without headlights, my parents would disappear into the trees and return dragging the perfect.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Pine. Oh.

[Karen Kilgariff]

No. Flash forward to college. I'm swapping holiday memories with my roommate. She's telling sweet stories about baking shortbread cookies with her mom and I'm like, oh well. We used to drive into the woods at night without lights and whisper while my parents cut down a tree. Her smile slowly morphed into confusion. That's when it hit me. Oh my God, we were stealing Christmas trees. It didn't. I didn't get it until I read.

[Georgia Hardstark]

That. I was like, no lights to get a Christmas tree? I don't know about.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That. She laughed so hard she cried and I, mortified, immediately called my parents. They didn't even try to deny it in fact, they chuckled and said, well, yeah, but it was all fine. They reassured me because years later my dad worked weekends at a tree farm. So in their minds, it was basically even. I still laugh how sincere. My parents are strong, resourceful people who would do anything to make sure that we had joyful memories, even if those memories came with a bit of a.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Misdemeanor.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Aw. Ssdgm. And don't get caught stealing spruces. S. And then it says, P.S. keeping my full name off this one because who knows if the statute of limitations covers holiday tree heists from the.

[Georgia Hardstark]

80S. I'm wondering if it was from the forest or from a Christmas tree.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Farm. Yeah, it sounds to me like once I read all the way through, I was like, I bet they pulled up on a little next to the Christmas tree farm and then like cut through the.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Fence.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Totally. Because I think they do extend past. I mean, that's how all the Christmas tree farms up.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Were. Yeah, like if he worked there eventually, then there's a place to work.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Because.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yes.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Okay.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah. All right. Gotta do what you gotta do, right? Okay. Trash dad. Parent story. Hey, Murder mavens. You have been such a constant in my life since 2016, and I'm so thankful for the laughs and the reminders that I deserve to take up space in this increasingly wild world. An additional hello to Steven, the crew and the critters. If there are any young kids listening. Might want to pause or skip this one. Yes, but it's actually for a different reason. It's funny. It's about Santa Claus, everyone. So if you pause it, if your.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Kid. Yeah, we're going to talk about his specific.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Route. Loves him. Yeah. Something you have to know about my father in law is that he is very dyslexic and at the time this story took place was a bit of a mostly functional alcoholic. So it's Christmas Eve in the late 90s and my mother in law has pristinely wrapped the family's gifts and then passed them along to my father in law to label and put under the tree. Shortly later, tasks completed, everyone headed to bed. The next day on Christmas morning, my spouse, then about seven or eight, was excitedly unwrapping gifts. They grabbed the next gift and my mother in law asked, who's that one from? My spouse? Um, Satan. Mother in law. What Spouse showing mother in law the tag. It says Satan. My mother in law then starts at the tags on all of my spouse's gifts from Santa and sees that her dyslexic husband, several beers deep, had misspelled Santa on most of the gifts, making the devil seem like a very generous.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Guy. That's how he gets.

[Georgia Hardstark]

You. That's right. And that, my friends, is how my spouse found out the truth about Santa. So he like, believed Santa didn't spell his name wrong.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Friends. That's right. He would know how to spell.

[Georgia Hardstark]

It. That's right. Stay sexy and spell check the gift tags. Lara rhymes with Sarah. She.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Her. Oh my.

[Georgia Hardstark]

God. Yeah, Satan. Love.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It. A drunk dad being like, there you go.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Satan. Have fun. Love, Satan. We hope you guys are having a good holiday and thank you for writing your stories and write them into my favorite murdermail if you feel like.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It. And this year, why don't you do some stuff that will then enable you to write in next.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Year? Yeah, what are you gonna.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Do? Throw a box of nails at your nieces and nephews while they're on the ground looking for.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Candy? Let us know we want another.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Story. Please don't hurt anybody, but make something.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Happen. Yeah, and stay sexy and don't get.

[Commercial Announcer 2]

Murdered. Goodbye.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Elvis. Do you want a.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Cookie? This has been an exactly right.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Production. Our senior producer is Molly Smith and our associate producer is Tessa.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Hughes. Our editor is Aristotle.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Lado. This episode was mixed by Liana.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Squachi. Email your hometowns to my favorite.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Murder gmail.com follow the show on Instagram at My favorite.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Murder. Listen to My favorite murder on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Podcasts. Or Watch us on YouTube. Search for my favorite murder and then like and.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Subscribe.

[Commercial Announcer 4]

Goodbye. Support for the show comes from Public, the investing platform for those who take it seriously. On Public, you can build a multi asset portfolio of stocks, bonds, options, crypto and now generated assets which allow you to turn any idea into an investable index. With AI. It all starts with your prompt. From renewable energy companies with high free cash flow to semiconductor suppliers growing revenue over 20% year over year, you can literally type any prompt and put the AI to work. It screens thousands of stocks, builds a one of a kind index and lets you back test it against the S&P 500. Then you can invest in a few clicks. Generated assets are like EFTs with infinite possibilities, completely customizable and based on your thesis, not someone else's. Go to public.com podcast and earn an uncapped 1% bonus when you transfer your portfolio. That's public.com podcast paid for by Public Investing Brokerage Services by Open to the Public Investing Inc. Member finra, SIPC Advisory Services by Public Advisors llc SEC Registered Advisor Generated Assets is an interactive analysis tool. Output is for informational purposes only and is not investment recommendation or advice. Complete Disclosures available at public.comDisclosures@CVS it.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Matters that we're not just in your.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Community, but that we're part of it. It matters that we're here for.

[Georgia Hardstark]

You when you need us, day or night, and we want everyone to feel welcomed and.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Rewarded. It matters that CVS is here to fill your prescriptions and here to.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Fill your craving for a tasty and, yeah, healthy.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Snack. At cvs, we're proud to serve.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Your community because we believe where you get your medicine.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Matters. So Visit [e-mail] or just come by our.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Store. We can't wait to meet you. Store hours vary by.

[Commercial Announcer 4]

Location. Running my small business was like.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Playing basketball five on one and I was the.

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One. Now QuickBooks gives me access to a team of AI agents and trusted experts for the.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Assists. I need nothing but net outdoit with intuit QuickBooks feature availability varies by.

[Commercial Announcer 2]

Product. Make their holiday unforgettable with a gift that says it all from Pandora Jewelry. A gift that tells a story and shows you know theirs that doesn't just sparkle, but speaks. From new festive charms to forever rings and personal engravings, this season, give a gift that's perfectly theirs. Whether you're shopping for a shiny surprise for your significant other, matching bracelets to celebrate your friendship, or a heartfelt gift for a family member, say more this holiday season with Pandora. Shop [e-mail] or visit your closest Pandora.