MFM Minisode 486

Summary

---

My Favorite Murder Minisode 486 — Detailed Summary

Podcast: My Favorite Murder
Hosts: Karen Kilgariff & Georgia Hardstark
Episode: Minisode 486
Date: May 4, 2026

---

Overview

This special Mother's Day-themed minisode of My Favorite Murder is an unconventional tribute to mothers, mother figures, and the many forms of maternal support that shape lives. Instead of focusing solely on biological mothers, Karen and Georgia honor the women (and sometimes men) who show up in ways big and small—through rescue, emotional care, found family, teaching, or supernatural winks from beyond. The hosts read six listener-submitted stories, weaving their own humor, empathy, and vulnerability throughout, and reflecting on the far-reaching impact of motherly love (from family and chosen family alike).

---

Key Discussion Points & Listener Stories

1. Introduction and Setting the Tone (01:57–02:27)

• Karen and Georgia open the minisode, joking about their long tenure and reading listener emails, specifically themed as “an unconventional salute to mother like figures or mothers or mother situations” (02:18).
• They stress: “No one’s gonna check this. We can do it any way we want to.” (Karen, 02:32)

---

2. Story: Sadako, the Feisty Mother-in-Law (02:37–05:10)

Listener: Erin

• Erin writes about Sadako, her uncle’s mother-in-law, a “tiny, feisty, funny Japanese woman who brooked no shit from anyone” (02:46).
• Sadako made a huge impact on Erin’s childhood and adulthood, offering care, encouragement, and joy (candy, detours driving through the countryside, and rebelliousness against societal expectations).
• Significant moment: Sadako’s validation of Erin’s life choices—“she was so proud of me in whatever I did. Carries me through when times are hard.” (04:56)
• Both hosts grow emotional, reflecting on the desire to be that kind of light to someone else in life.
  • Georgia: “This is what I want to be in someone’s life when I’m older. I don’t have kids.” (05:14)
  • Karen: “May we all [be a Sadako].” (05:41)

---

3. Story: “That One Time My Adoptive Parents Stole Me” (05:45–08:07)

Listener: Sarah

• Sarah recounts being taken in by her aunt and uncle after a childhood of instability and dangerous caretakers.
• Her aunt staged a covert “rescue,” under the guise of a cousin’s birthday party, and then never returned Sarah to her unsafe environment.
  • “Lainie called to ask if I was ready to be picked up, and my aunt answered with a simple, ‘No, thanks, we’ve got it from here.’ And never brought me back.” (07:10)
• Sarah recognizes her luck and the privilege of being adopted into a loving home and expresses deep thanks.
  • “I realize I was one of the lucky ones. … I’m forever grateful and pay it forward whenever I can.” (07:54)
• Both hosts reflect on the importance of protective women and “the people who understand how at risk children can be…” (Karen, 07:53)

---

4. Story: “Wedding Dress Treasure” & Remembering a Mother (10:23–13:37)

Listener: Julie

• After her mother passes away unexpectedly from mesothelioma, Julie discovers her mom’s 1965 wedding dress in a box of old photographs.
• The dress is in perfect condition. Miraculously, it fits Julie, and she wears it to her own wedding—honoring her mom’s presence even after death.
  • “It was especially meaningful because right before her surgery I had told my mom ... we were planning on getting married. ... She was singing going to the chapel.” (11:52)
  • “In 2010, 10 months after my mom died, I wore her perfect dress and walked with my two little girls … to marry my amazing husband. I feel like it was my mom’s way of being at the wedding, even when she couldn’t be there.” (12:50)
• Hosts respond with awe, relating their own wedding dress and mother stories.
  • Karen: “I wore my mom’s wedding dress ... And similar vibe of it was just longer.” (13:19)
  • Karen: “I love the idea of a mother that has fucking mesothelioma ... and is like, I have to make sure she finds this dress.” (13:38)

---

5. Story: Surrogate Mother—Barbara’s Influence (13:52–17:26)

Listener: Jazz

• Jazz describes growing up with emotionally distant parents and finding warmth, discipline, and humor from her friend’s mother, Barbara, who became a surrogate mother.
  • “My mother was a raging narcissist ... My childhood best friend's mother became my surrogate mother. Her name was Barbara.” (14:00–14:20)
  • “She bought me clothes, meals, and let me sleep over at her house whenever I needed a break.” (14:47)
• Barbara’s death hit hard, but her legacy of safety and acceptance remains.
• Jazz emotionally connects Karen and Georgia’s voices to Barbara’s, finding solace in their podcast.
  • “Sometimes when I listen to the podcast, I can imagine what it would be like discussing current events with [Barbara] if she were here.” (16:40)
  • Karen: “That was like, I think this is the point of this, which is what Mother’s Day is like for people whose mothers are gone, or who never had them in the first place.” (17:03)
• Both hosts are deeply moved; Karen relates with her own family’s history of chosen family.

---

6. Story: The Supernatural Lamp—A Final Wink (20:18–22:49)

Listener: Allie

• After her best friend Sierra’s mom dies unexpectedly, a series of supernatural events occur as they move out her belongings: a lamp in her mother’s bedroom keeps turning on, even after being unplugged and moved.
  • “We unplugged the lamp and … moved the lamp away from the outlet... When we walked outside we both looked up ... and saw the light was off … When we reversed out, Sierra took one last look and I saw her jaw drop. The fucking light was on again and the lamp was back by the window.” (21:56)
• Both girls accept it as “her mom preferred the lights on,” finding comfort in this unexplained phenomenon.
• Allie thanks the podcast for destigmatizing mental illness.
  • “I used to be so ashamed and scared of my mental illnesses, but over the years I have learned that my mental illnesses don’t define me or control what I am capable of.” (22:38)
• Hosts reflect on these “little unexplained things” as signs of continued love.
  • Karen: “They just need you to know that they love you… It’s like a little wink.” (23:12–23:15)

---

7. Story: My Honorary Mom—A Teacher’s Legacy (23:44–26:37)

Listener: Tyler

• Tyler pays tribute to Mrs. Hamstra, his 7th grade math teacher, who built up his self-esteem after a tough academic year and provided a safe haven before school.
  • “She helped me overcome the intense feeling of failure ... Not only did she help instill confidence, but she taught in such a way where math no longer felt hard to me.” (23:45)
  • “She opened up her classroom to me in the early mornings... I’m a teacher now and there’s not a snowball’s chance in hell I’d be at work that early.” (23:56)
• Mrs. Hamstra’s battle with ALS didn’t stop her from encouraging and loving her students—even moving to teach in Colombia to “experience life before she could no longer.”
  • “She always made sure to make her friends, family, and former students feel heard and seen and loved. ... She’s the reason I am a teacher today.” (25:51–26:00)
• The hosts highlight the recurring, powerful theme of women using empathy and connection to ease others’ suffering—especially for kids and teens in need.

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “This is what I aspire to be … Sadako.” — Georgia (05:38)
• “Stay sexy and, when in doubt, steal your niece.” — Sarah’s story (07:57)
• “Why have we never thought [of ‘fuck you, I’m remarried’ sweats]?” — Karen (12:55)
• “My mother was a raging narcissist with the dead eyes and emotions of a 400-year-old shark.” — Jazz’s story (14:02)
• “The power of women ... connection to other humans in a way that … can make up for so much horror.” — Karen (26:12)
• “Pick a middle school girl. They need you, dude.” — Karen (26:37)

---

Emotional Reflections and Commentary

• Karen tears up repeatedly, noting how these stories resonate with her own history of chosen family and loss.
• The hosts joke about their own emotional reactions and appearance while crying (17:44–18:09), displaying characteristic self-deprecation and vulnerability.
• Discussion on how Mother’s Day is fraught for those who have lost mothers or found family elsewhere—offering comfort to listeners in similar situations (17:03–17:26).
• Georgia: “You call people cousins ... you have a huge, huge [chosen family].” (15:17)
• Both highlight how listeners’ stories demonstrate the “Karen kindness” — and encourage listeners to show this empathy to others, especially youth.

---

Summary & Closing Thoughts

Throughout the episode, Karen and Georgia celebrate the many forms of motherhood, weaving together listener stories highlighting resilience, chosen family, and unexpected maternal love. Their responses are warm, relatable, and often emotional, encouraging listeners to find and be that kind of light in someone else’s life. The episode ends with an earnest plea: “Martarinos. You can be this to someone else at some point in your life. So always look for opportunities where you can do that for someone else.” (Georgia, 26:28)

Final message:
“Stay sexy and don’t get murdered.” (26:40)

Transcript

[Karen Kilgariff]

This is exactly right.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Make everyday epic with the all new Hyundai Palisade Hybrid.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It's everything you love about the Palisade elevated.

[Georgia Hardstark]

It features class leading interior space and purposeful tech designed for real life.

[Karen Kilgariff]

The 2.5T hybrid engine with an up to an EPA estimated 619 miles of range on select trims. It's built for long hauls, quick errands and everything in between.

[Georgia Hardstark]

And the Palisade Hybrid comes with an available class exclusive dash camera feature for extra peace of mind. The Hyundai Palisade Hybrid is the SUV that will inspire you to make the most out of every journey.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Learn more about the Hyundai palisade@hyundai USA.com

[Georgia Hardstark]

Call 562-314-4603 for complete details. Goodbye this Mother's Day Celebrate the woman behind it all with Pandora Jewelry.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Get your mom some jewelry that feels personal and reflects the moments that matter most.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Whether that's a date, a name, or a shared memory. You can make it even more meaningful with an engraving in your own handwriting.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Because the best Mother's Day gift says more than just I love you.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Find the perfect Mother's Day gift at your local Pandora store or [e-mail] Goodbye.

[Advertisement/Announcer]

Brought to you by Apple Card. Hey, you could be earning 2% daily cash back on that purchase. And that one. And even that one. That's because Apple card users earn 2% daily cash back on every purchase, including everyday items they buy online or in store when using their Apple Card. With Apple Payments, not an Apple Card customer. You can apply in the Wallet app on iPhone subject to credit approval. Apple Card issued by Goldman Sachs Bank USA Salt Lake City Branch terms and more at Apple Co Benefits.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Hello and welcome to my favorite murder.

[Karen Kilgariff]

This is the Minisode.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yes, it is.

[Karen Kilgariff]

This is the Minisode.

[Georgia Hardstark]

We've been doing this for years.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It's fine. We know what we're doing and we always have.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Trust us. Trust us with your life.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And your emails which you sent to us.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yes, you did. And we're gonna read them. Good job. Good intro.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Thanks so much. You wanna go first?

[Georgia Hardstark]

This is for Mother's Day.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Oh, yes. So we're doing kind of an unconventional salute to mother like figures or mothers or mother situations.

[Georgia Hardstark]

The way they've shown up for you

[Karen Kilgariff]

in different ways in any way a mother or a mother like figure can't, right? No one's gonna check this. We can do it any way we want to.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Okay. This one is from a fan cult member named Erin. And it starts. Sadako made my childhood better. My adolescence tolerable and my adulthood enjoyable. My uncle's mother in law, Sadako, a tiny, feisty, funny Japanese woman who. Who brooked no shit from anyone. Is that a thing?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah. Brooke. Well, it's Brooknow something that's like an old fashioned saying.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Brooks know what's it called? Quarter.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yes.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Really?

[Karen Kilgariff]

I think so.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Led Zeppelin. That's purely from Led Zeppelin?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Who brooked no shit from anyone. Made my life so much better. So this is the mother in law of her uncle. Which is like so random and un. You don't even have to be nice to that person. But she's.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yes, exactly. But those are the people that at like the family functions where you're like, I need to go sit by Sadako. Cause she's the best.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Totally. Okay. She would slit me candy clean the glass doors so well I walked into them more than once. Made me feel seen and encouraged me to live my life before doing anything my other relatives expected of me. I. E. Marriage, children, and all that BS that was pressed upon me starting at 14. Gross.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I love that she slipped and cleaned the glass windows so we walked into them.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah, like that's how dedicated she was to whatever she was doing.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It sounded to me like two pluses and a minus hidden in there as an adult.

[Georgia Hardstark]

My home intentionally was located near hers. We would do store runs, lunches out, picture all 90 pounds of her eating a massive wagyu burger the size of her face. Shared treats from her family in Japan, some great and some, I learned, were absolutely foul as I ate it, much to her joy and generally demanded that any event I was required to attend, that I would be the one to chauffeur her so we could bail early and just have a nice drive home. Where we would take detours to just drive through all the green and sunshine in spring and summer. She passed April 16, 2022. And I cherish the memories I have with her. While the rest of my extended family doesn't understand or even really know how much she meant to me, she is still a light in my life. Pictures I have of her holding my firstborn, a daughter, and her telling me that I did everything right and that she was so proud of me in whatever I did. Carries me through when times are hard. She is loved and missed every day. May everyone have someone like her in life. Aaron. And before we started, you were like, you're gonna cry? No, no. But you said, I'm gonna cry. I'm gonna break. And I'm like, I don't break for mothers. But this is what I want to be.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That's your bumper circuit break for mothers. I don't break for mothers, but this

[Georgia Hardstark]

is what I want to be in someone's life when I'm older. I don't have kids.

[Karen Kilgariff]

You are with Micah, like with your nephews.

[Georgia Hardstark]

They don't care, but they don't care. I think a girl, you know, they

[Karen Kilgariff]

don't act like they don't care. I mean, they act like they don't care, but they do. Because that's the other thing is I think that anti position it you giving them anything they give to you and you just kind of follow.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And that's the piece of it. Okay.

[Georgia Hardstark]

You know, this is what I aspire to be is Sadako.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Sadako.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

May we all. Okay.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I don't break for mothers.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I don't break for mothers. And people are driving behind you like, what is. What is her problem? Okay. The subject line of this is that one time my adoptive parents stole me light hearted. And it says, I'll just jump right in. I was removed from my home when I was 8 years old and raised by my aunt and uncle who would eventually become my parents. Before this happened, though, I'd seen some seriously bad parenting For a few years. My biological mother tried to get sober many times. And during one impromptu rehab stay, she left me at her sleazy friend Laney's apartment. This woman liked pills a lot and frequently fell asleep while driving me around. One time, she thought she was parked and took her foot off the brake and we slowly crept down small hill into oncoming traffic. I got to save the day that day. Eight years old.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I mean,

[Karen Kilgariff]

I don't ever remember telling anyone all the crazy shenanigans this lady got us into. But somehow my badass aunt and RN knew I wasn't safe. She came up with a sneaky plan that I never knew about until years later when she nostalgically asked me, remember that time I stole you from Laney's? I did remember being there for an entire summer, but couldn't remember details. Her plan was to tell Lainey that they were having a birthday party for my cousin and she would pick me up and they could make arrangements to return me after the party. Later that day, Lainie called to ask if I was ready to be picked up, and my aunt answered with a simple, no, thanks, we've got it from here. And never brought me back.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Oh my God. Okay. It's gonna get me.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I had no idea any of this went on since I was used to being shuffled around and these people seemed n who eventually became my adoptive mother ssdgmed and got me the f out of there. Stay sexy and when in doubt, steal your niece. Side note, I realize I was one of the lucky ones. Hold on. God damn it. This is what this whole thing is about. I know the people who understand how at risk children can be even when it's not the worst situation.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Totally.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I realized I was one of the lucky ones. I was not one of the many children who have to gather their belongings in trash bags and be thrown into a scary situation. I'm forever grateful and pay it forward whenever I can. Love you all.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Sarah oh my God. Sarah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Sarah and her badass aunt. That's just like na noo. Yeah yeah.

[Georgia Hardstark]

It's gorgeous.

[Karen Kilgariff]

So good. It's easy to make your drive amazing with reclining seats that melt the tension away, thoughtful tech and charging ports that keep every device powered.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Make every day epic with the Hyundai Palisade Hybrid.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It features class leading interior space and available front and second row relaxation seats that let you really recline and unwind.

[Georgia Hardstark]

The 2.5T hybrid engine with up to an EPA estimated 619 miles of range on select trims. It's built for long hauls, quick errands and everything in between no matter where you're headed.

[Karen Kilgariff]

The available 14 speaker Bose sound system makes for an immersive ride and the

[Georgia Hardstark]

Palisade Hybrid comes with an available class exclusive dash camera feature and available class exclusive blind spot view monitor for extra

[Karen Kilgariff]

extra peace of mind seating configurations for seven to eight passengers and with available

[Georgia Hardstark]

H track all wheel drive, you're ready to go anywhere in style.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Need more? You've got standard 100 watt USB C ports to keep every device powered and

[Georgia Hardstark]

a standard passenger talk intercom so you can threaten to turn this SUV around if you kids don't knock it off. Without taking your eyes off the road,

[Karen Kilgariff]

the all new Hyundai Palisade Hybrid is more than just another suv. It's still the Palisade, but with so much more.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Learn more about the Hyundai palisade@hyundai USA.com

[Karen Kilgariff]

Call 5604603 for complete details. Goodbye.

[Advertisement/Announcer]

Brought to you by Apple Card Apple card users get 2% daily cash back on purchases made in store and online, whether it's for big ticket items or everyday purchases. When they use their Apple Card with Apple Pay now, that's a benefit that's just too good to pass up. You could be earning 2% daily cash back when you use your Apple Card with Apple Pay to buy Turmeric for your signature curry. 2% back on flights to visit the family in Tucson and even 2% back on your kid's new tuba. You might even be able to get 2% back on a tuba tutor. Not an Apple card customer. You can apply in the wallet app on iPhone. Subject to credit approval. Apple card issued by Goldman Sachs bank usa Salt Lake City Branch terms and more at Apple Co benefits okay, this

[Georgia Hardstark]

is wedding dress Treasure Dear fellow LA peoples and creatures, in 2008 my mom was diagnosed with mesothelioma. That bitch of a cancer caused by asbestos.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Horrible.

[Georgia Hardstark]

She underwent chemotherapy and refused to lose a single hair on her head because she was too stubborn and vain for that shit.

[Karen Kilgariff]

How did she do that?

[Georgia Hardstark]

I don't know. Wow. Super glue. That's amazing.

[Karen Kilgariff]

She's like, I'm not doing it.

[Georgia Hardstark]

While her long term prognosis wasn't great, she was doing pretty well and underwent cancer related surgery in February 2009. The expectation was for her to come through the surgery and my siblings and I were planning on taking turns caring for her after the surgery back in our hometown in Pennsylvania. But things didn't go as planned and she died from complications from the surgery on her 69th birthday. So we ended up unexpectedly planning a funeral and packing up her house. In the weeks following her death, I was going through a cardboard box of photos from the 60s and at the bottom of the box under all these photos, there was a crumpled up plastic bag with what looked like a lace tablecloth. My mother was exceedingly organized, so it was odd to have something stuffed randomly in there, but I pulled it out to see what it was. I shook it out, took it out of the plastic bag and was surprised to see that it was her wedding dress from when she married my father in 1965.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Wow.

[Georgia Hardstark]

White dress, knee length, empire waist with long lace sleeves. One that Georgia would love. And I have a photo of it and it looks identical to my fucking wedding. My actual wedding dress.

[Karen Kilgariff]

For real?

[Georgia Hardstark]

Pretty much.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That's amazing.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Not a stain on it, not a tear, not a rip. Basically in perfect condition despite being stored in the worst for over 40 years. I tried it on because of course, and it fit me perfectly. Sweet, right? But it was especially meaningful because right before her surgery I had told my mom on the phone that my boyfriend and I were looking for a house and were planning on getting married. My first marriage had gone down in flames and the fact that I was getting remarried to a man who loved me and my two young daughters made her incredibly happy. According to my sister she was singing going to the chapel when she came out of the surgery in 2010, 10 months after my mom died, I wore her perfect dress and walked with my two little girls in the backyard of our new home to marry my amazing husband. I feel like it was my mom's way of being at the wedding, even when she couldn't be there. Below are photos of my mom, Kathy and dad, Dan. Good job. Thank you. On their wedding day. And one of me in the dress on mine. Oh, and please make those fuck you, I'm remarried sweats. Oh. Because I need them.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Why have we never thought.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Brilliant. Thanks for all you've done in so many ways. Ssdgm. And remember to not pack cool family heirlooms in Ziploc bags in cardboard boxes ever. Julie. And so I think we can show the photos. Look at that dress. I had the original. Amazing. And then. Let's see. That is your dress, Julie. It is. It's crazy. Like the scalloped top.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yes.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Oh, so beautiful.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I'm not trying to cut in on your thing, but that also looks like my wedding dress. Cause I wore my mom's wedding dress.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah, you wore your mom's wedding.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah. And similar vibe of it was just longer. Yeah.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Pretty.

[Karen Kilgariff]

So pretty. You know what, Maybe it's the thing of they're like, it's not the classic Mother's Day because her mother died.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Right, Right.

[Karen Kilgariff]

But I love the idea of a mother that has fucking mesothelioma who was like trying to like get through every day and is like, I have to make sure she finds this dress.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

So she sticks it in a box.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Okay. So this one, the subject line is surrogate mother. It says, hey, folks, growing up, my mother was a raging narcissist with the dead eyes and emotions of a 400-year-old shark.

[Georgia Hardstark]

That. Wow, that's the best description I've ever heard of Anyone like, I know what you're talking about.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I mean, that's crazy, right? Just get it right out there. My dad was a vodka soaked guitar player still chasing his dreams of stardom while mentally being stuck in the 80s. And they did their best to raise me while still being kids themselves. But there was always a very deep lack of emotion in our relationship. And I felt alone a lot. My childhood best friend's mother became my surrogate mother. Her name was Barbara. A teenager growing up in the 80s. She had the best stories. She partied with some of the musicians I was obsessed with. She encouraged me to be myself, but she also called me on my Bullshit. Since the second grade, she bought me clothes, meals, and let me sleep over at her house whenever I needed a break from my own.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Sorry. I knew it. I was reading these. Just like, Karen is gonna fucking lose it.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I mean, it's like, a, did I not eat breakfast? But B, this. That's how my mom grew up, because both of her parents were alcoholics, and my aunt Kay Kirkpatrick, Antone Giovanni, was her best friend, and she was raised by them. So when we were growing up, we had my grandma, who we loved and was great, but then we had the Kirkpatricks that I was always like, who are these things? People who are also our grandparents.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah. I mean, you have. I was thinking about, like, your friends and neighbors and this person and you call people cousins. Like, you have a huge, huge. Yeah. So I was like, she's gonna cry at every single one of these.

[Karen Kilgariff]

There's. I'm gonna relate to every single person.

[Georgia Hardstark]

If we do a cat episode, I'll cry at every single one.

[Karen Kilgariff]

She even drove me all over town for an entire day looking for an apartment to move into when I was 17, and my own mother told me she couldn't afford to have me live in her house anymore. She was riotously funny, sarcastic, and I, love, adopted me as her own child, and her house became my safe space until I was almost 20. She taught me a lot. Barbara passed away in her sleep from a heart attack in her late 40s in 2018. That's tough.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Wow.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Mostly I miss hearing her voice because it had a charming, calming quality to it. I found that same feeling in the voices of your podcast.

[Georgia Hardstark]

God damn it. Wow.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Also, it was on the second page.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Surprise.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Hold for emotion. You both have similar voices to Barbara and very similar senses of humor. I know she would have loved your podcast, and I would have shown it to her if I'd discovered it back then. Sometimes when I listen to the podcast. God damn it. Sometimes when I listen to the podcast, I can imagine what it would be like discussing current events with her if she were here.

[Georgia Hardstark]

This is. Oh, my God.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I do that all the time with my mom.

[Georgia Hardstark]

You do?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Well, yeah. She would fucking love this so much. She would think it was amazing. Like, oh, my God. Sorry. God damn it.

[Georgia Hardstark]

No, it's good that one of us has.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That was like, I think this is the point of this, which is this is what Mother's Day is like for people whose mothers are gone or who never had them in the first place. It's just what it's like. This is just one of the many reasons why I love what you do. It helps combat the loneliness of losing someone you care about deeply to remember them fondly. And you've both helped me to do that. It's truly a gift. And then it just says Jazz.

[Georgia Hardstark]

God, I never like thought of us in that way.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I know.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I mean, we call each other aunties all the time, but like actually what that means. Yeah. Jazz.

[Karen Kilgariff]

You said Jazz.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Jazz.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Thanks, Jazz.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Thanks, Jazz.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Thanks for making me cry on tv, Jazz. Very unprofessional.

[Georgia Hardstark]

We contain multitudes. Karen has all the tears. You also look pretty when you cry, which is fucking hard to do. I don't look pretty when I cry.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That's hilarious. Because to me I look like an. Like the second I have emotion, my eyes turn bright red.

[Georgia Hardstark]

No, they don't.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I. It always looks crazy to me.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Same for me.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah. Why are we we're criticizing our appearance while we're having an emotion. That's.

[Georgia Hardstark]

What the fuck?

[Karen Kilgariff]

That's old. That's 90s shit.

[Georgia Hardstark]

That's weird.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Get rid of it. Yeah, it's easy to make your drive amazing with reclining seats that melt the tension away, thoughtful tech and charging ports that keep every device powered make everyday

[Georgia Hardstark]

epic with the Hyundai Palisade Hybrid.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It features class leading interior space and available front and second row relaxation seats that let you really recline and unwind.

[Georgia Hardstark]

The 2.5T hybrid engine with up to an EPA estimated 619 miles of range on select trims. It's built for long hauls, quick errands and everything in between no matter where you're headed.

[Karen Kilgariff]

The available 14 speaker Bose sound system makes for an immersive ride.

[Georgia Hardstark]

And the Palisade Hybrid comes with an available class exclusive dash camera feature and available class exclusive blind spot view monitor

[Karen Kilgariff]

for extra peace of mind seating configurations for seven to eight passengers and with

[Georgia Hardstark]

available H track all wheel drive, you're ready to go anywhere in style.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Need more? You've got standard 100 watt USB C ports to keep every device powered and

[Georgia Hardstark]

a standard passenger talk intercom so you can threaten to turn this SUV around if you kids don't knock it off without taking your eyes off the road.

[Karen Kilgariff]

The all new Hyundai Palisade Hybrid is more than just another suv. It's still the Palisade, but with so much more.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Learn more about the Hyundai palisade@hyundai USA.com

[Karen Kilgariff]

Call 562-314-4603 for complete details.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Goodbye.

[Advertisement/Announcer]

Brought to you by Apple Card Apple card users get 2% daily cash back on purchases made in store and online, whether it's for big ticket items or everyday purchases when they use their Apple Card with Apple Pay. Now that's a benefit that's just too good to pass up. You could be earning 2% daily cash back when you use your Apple Card with Apple Pay to buy turmeric for your signature curry, 2% back on flights to visit the family in Tucson, and even 2% back on your kid's new tuba. You might even be able to get 2% back on a tuba tutorial, not an Apple card customer. You can apply in the Wallet app on iPhone subject to credit approval. Apple card issued by Goldman Sachs bank usa, Salt Lake City Branch terms and more at Apple Co Benefits okay, Not

[Georgia Hardstark]

All Spirits like the Dark this is my last one. Get ready to cry. Okay if you don't cry this one something's wrong. Hey my favorite murderino babes and four legged friends so my best friend Sierra's mom passed away unexpectedly in 2015 and it shattered everyone who knew her. She was the neighborhood mom who took care of every child as if they were her own and since I grew up with my best friend, her mother was like a second mom to me. Because of her unexpected passing. Her landlord was very kind and gave us extra time to arrange her belongings and get everything removed from her condo. Sierra and I were finishing everything up and Left only a single lamp in the house. A cheap dollar store 6 foot lamp. Shut all the lights off and locked up. When we were pulling out we looked back at the house one last time trying to remember all the great times we shared there and noticed that the LA that was left in her mother's room was on. Thinking one of us must have not flipped the switch all the way or some bullshit. I parked my truck and went back in to turn off the light. This time I knew 100% that the light was off and continued to lock up the house. When we went to leave the light was on. At this point we thought someone's playing a dumb prank on us, so we both went in and took one last look around. Of course the house was empty so this time for good measure we unplugged the lamp and Sierra even moved the lamp away from the outlet which was by to the opposite side of the room and we closed the door thinking that it must have been some freak occurrence or that we were both just mentally exhausted from the recent events. When we walked outside we both looked up at her mother's bedroom window and saw the light was off and we laughed for a second, climbed back into my truck and went to leave. When we reversed out, Sierra took one last look and I saw her jaw drop. The fucking light was on again and the lamp was back by the window.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Whoa.

[Georgia Hardstark]

At that point we said fuck it and agreed that her mom preferred the lights on. Looking back now, we laugh about it and take solace in the fact that she's still with us and still finds ways to make us smile. Thank you for bearing with me through this email as I am not the best writer. That's not true.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yes, you are. That was a great story.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I also want to say thank you for helping people be more aware of mental illness and helping erase the stigma that comes with having a mental illness. I used to be so ashamed and scared of my mental illnesses, but over the years I have learned that my mental illnesses don't define me or control what I am capable of. Much love from Columbus, Ohio, Ali Kay Allie.

[Karen Kilgariff]

My mom would be so excited to

[Georgia Hardstark]

hear you say that. That's so beautiful. Yeah, that was your mom's work.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That was her life's work.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Totally.

[Karen Kilgariff]

But also, I mean, if I was in that drive in that parking lot and I looked back up, I would have just been like, like, yeah, someone call the police or something. Like, holy.

[Georgia Hardstark]

No, it's so. I love those little unexplained things that you're just like, of course it's what it is. Of course. It's that.

[Karen Kilgariff]

They just need you to know that they love you.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah, it's like a little wink.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah. Okay, here's my last one. It says, my honorary mom is a subject line. It says, hi KNG, been listening since 2018. Love you gals, etc. My honorary mom was Mrs. Hamstra, my seventh grade math teacher. She helped me overcome the intense feeling of failure after a very terrible year of 6th grade math. Not only did she help instill confidence, but she taught in such a way where math no longer felt hard to me.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Jesus.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I mean, that's a great teacher. Mrs. Amstra opened up her classroom to me in the early mornings when I had to be dropped off at 7:30 and school didn't start until 9:20. Oh, I'm a teacher now and there's not a snowball's chance in hell I'd be at work that early. For real.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I had a teacher that let me in at lunch when I didn't have any friends.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah.

[Georgia Hardstark]

And like eat lunch in her. And then I didn't have lunch too. And so she gave me lunch, like half her sandwich or whatever.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah. She listened to me, laughed with Me and allowed me to be my weird middle school self, all while encouraging and reminding me that though math was hard, I was capable. Middle school is. Should be illegal. It's the fucking worst.

[Georgia Hardstark]

You are at your worst. Hormonally, physically, mentally. Like, none of it makes sense.

[Karen Kilgariff]

There's a family picture of me, and I'm in seventh grade, and I'm still wearing, like, those little mini ponytails. Like, my hair's down, but then mini ponytails and, like, overalls. And I was just like, overalls?

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yep.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I'm dressed like I'm in fourth grade.

[Georgia Hardstark]

You, like, haven't figured out if you're this or that yet. A grownup or a kid.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Right?

[Georgia Hardstark]

And then you call break recess, and everyone makes fun of you, even though it was just recess fucking a year ago.

[Karen Kilgariff]

The rules keep changing.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah, it's bullshit.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Okay, fast forward a few years. Mrs. Hamster and I kept in touch, and I learned the devastating news that she had als. She sold all of her belongings and moved to Columbia to become an English and math teacher. She said she wanted to experience life before she could no longer. Mrs. Hamstra had the advent of a lifetime. And though I never got to hear all these stories, not long after she returned back home, her ALS got worse. Despite battling such a terrible disease, she always made sure to make her friends, family, and former students feel heard and seen and loved. Mrs. Hamstrup passed away in 2022 after a long and valiant battle with ALS. She's the reason I am a teacher today. Come on. And I hope that I can make my students feel confident, seen and heard. Because middle school sucks. But one teacher can truly make a difference. Thank you, Tyler. She. Her. Oh, my God.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Tyler.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Tyler. Also, all the themes here, women, total. The power of women. Women knowing their responsibility, their empathy, their,

[Georgia Hardstark]

like, connection to other humans in a way that.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That really they can make up for. So much horror. And just like that, Karen kindness and awareness.

[Georgia Hardstark]

The Karen kindness.

[Karen Kilgariff]

The Karen kindness.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Martarinos. You can be this to someone else at some point in your life. So always look for opportunities where you can do that for someone, for someone else. And it's just so meaningful.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Pick a middle school girl. They need you, dude.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yes, please. And stay sexy and don't get murdered.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Goodbye,

[Georgia Hardstark]

Elvis. Do you want a cookie?

[Karen Kilgariff]

This has been an exactly right production.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Our senior producer is Molly Smith and our associate producer is Tessa Hughes.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Our editor is Aristotle Acevedo.

[Georgia Hardstark]

This episode was mixed by Liana Squillace.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Email your hometowns to my favorite murder

[Georgia Hardstark]

gmail.com follow the show on Instagram at My Favorite Murder.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Listen to My Favorite murder on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Georgia Hardstark]

And now you can watch My Favorite Murder on Netflix.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And when you're there, hit the double thumbs up and the Remind Me buttons. That's the best way you can support our show. Goodbye.

[Georgia Hardstark]

This Mother's Day Celebrate the woman behind it all with Pandora Jewelry.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Get your mom some jewelry that feels personal and reflects the moments that matter

[Georgia Hardstark]

most, whether that's a date, a name, or a shared memory. You can make it even more meaningful with an engraving in your own handwriting,

[Karen Kilgariff]

because the best Mother's Day gift says more than just I love you.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Find the perfect Mother's Day gift at your local Pandora store or [e-mail] Goodbye

[Advertisement/Announcer]

brought to you by Apple Card hey, you could be earning 2% daily cash back on that purchase. And that one. And even that one. That's because Apple card users earn 2% daily cash back on every purchase, including everyday items they buy online or in store when using their Apple Card. With Apple Pay, not an Apple Card customer, you can apply in the Wallet app on iPhone subject to credit approval. Apple Card issued by Goldman Sachs bank usa, Salt Lake City Branch Terms and more at Apple Co Benefits Sometimes you

[Karen Kilgariff]

need a trip that actually feels like an escape, not just a change of scenery.

[Georgia Hardstark]

That's exactly what Baha Mar and Nassau delivers between the casino and the water park. Like, I could have stayed there for months.

[Karen Kilgariff]

We were so lucky to get to this place. And it truly I just kept saying, like, this is such a good idea, where you immediately want to be in a tropical location, but then you also want to go out to dinner that night. That is the ultimate vacation for me of you're getting a little treat of everything.

[Georgia Hardstark]

It's paradise. Plan your own [e-mail] Goodbye.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Goodbye.