MFM Minisode 498

Summary

My Favorite Murder Minisode 498 Summary

Podcast: My Favorite Murder with Karen Kilgariff & Georgia Hardstark
Date: July 27, 2026
Episode Theme: Scams, Con Artists, and Swindles (Special “Royal Swindle” Tie-In)

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Episode Overview

This minisode is themed around scams, con artists, and grifters, celebrating the launch of the “Royal Swindle” podcast (Exactly Right’s new limited series about two Australian women who became high-society con artists in 1990s London). Karen and Georgia read listener-submitted stories about scams, scammers, and even a few personal confessions. The tone is comedic, irreverent, and full of empathy for both victims and the occasionally repentant swindler.

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Key Segment Timestamps

• [02:46] Introduction & Royal Swindle tie-in
• [03:35] Hotel room scam - all-expenses-paid con
• [09:57] The 19-year-old fake doctor in Denmark
• [22:06] Jury duty scam: Personal warning from a victim
• [29:02] Grandma exposes 1980s Arabian horse pyramid scheme
• [37:21] Preteen con artist in Las Vegas
• [42:58] Five-year-old “devil’s child” neighborhood scam

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Main Discussion Points & Listener Stories

1. Introduction & “Royal Swindle” Promo

• Karen and Georgia introduce the episode’s scam theme, inspired by the new “Royal Swindle” podcast.
• Several repeated fun promos/teasers give listeners a taste of “Royal Swindle’s” real-life high-society con.

2. Hotel Room Scam from the Perspective of a Restaurant Employee

[03:35 - 08:12]

• A listener named Laura recounts working at a hotel restaurant; all the employees fight over who gets to deliver room service to a lavish tipper.
• The tipper is discovered to be a scammer who stayed on a man’s credit card after a one-night stand, racking up $4,000 in charges.
• Notable quotes:
  • “She got a week-long, all expenses paid vacay on this guy's dime. And he didn’t have a clue until the credit card company called him.” - Story read by Guest/Caller ([06:26])
• The moral: Don’t cheat on your spouse, and always check out of your hotel.
• Funny banter about the “daughter who sells airplanes” and how scammer backstories can get outlandish.
• Empathy at play for all sides, with the final verdict: “You just never know what someone is up to, you know?” ([08:12] - Guest/Caller)

3. Fake 19-Year-Old Doctor in Denmark

[09:57 - 17:23]

• Listener Yasmin writes from Denmark about a young man who successfully impersonated a doctor at a hospital for a month.
• He examined patients, wrote records, prescribed medication, even nearly botched a diagnosis on a baby.
• The “doctor” tried to send an ambulance to a fake emergency, got caught, and received only a 30-day suspended sentence and 40 hours’ community service.
• Shock twist: He was later admitted to medical school and could one day practice for real.
• Notable quotes:
  • “He just really badly wanted to be a doctor. It had been his lifelong dream.” – Karen ([13:13])
  • “He was convicted... received a relatively short sentence. Danish media have never published his identity.” – Karen ([14:04])
  • “It’s one of these stories that sounds like Catch Me If You Can until you realize it happened in a pediatric ward.” – Karen ([16:48])
• Commentary on different rehabilitation and privacy standards in Denmark, and a humorous rumination on whether every hospital should know his name in the future.

4. Jury Duty Scam: Real-Time Victim’s Warning

[22:06 - 28:45]

• A listener (S) shares a gripping personal account of receiving a convincing scam call about failing to appear for jury duty.
• The “officer” uses high-pressure tactics, credible details, and insists on never hanging up the phone—demands $1,000+ in fines via Cash App/Apple Pay.
• Despite long-time true crime knowledge, the listener nearly falls for it until a bank visit prompts the realization it’s a scam. The scammers hang up at the first sign of trouble.
• Notable quotes:
  • “These scammers preyed upon that and held me hostage on the phone. And I went with it.” ([25:28] - Guest/Caller)
  • “You are not at fault. These people are skilled con artists. They know the game and put you in as an unwitting player.” ([26:53] - Guest/Caller)
• Useful advice: Any scenario where someone rushes you or insists you not hang up is a huge red flag. Always trust but verify; never pay legal fines via apps or cash.

5. Grandma vs. Pyramid Scheme in the 1980s

[29:02 - 33:19]

• Listener Bert’s grandmother Sylvia, a highly competent hotel sales manager, gets drawn into an “Arabian horse” investment scam.
• The would-be Ponzi scheme involves buying fractional shares in horses (“horse timeshares”). The ringleader forges financials; grandma finds out and immediately notifies authorities.
• Notable quote:
  • “Stay sexy and don’t invest in horses, because it’s probably a pyramid scheme.” – Bert ([33:19])
• Grandma goes on to work for women’s rights and help write sexual assault legislation—described as a true “badass.”

6. Trash Mom, Vegas Vacation & the Preteen Con Artist

[37:21 - 41:59]

• Listener Kate with a C tells a wild story of her 1996 Vegas trip with her brother and her mom’s gambling boyfriend.
• Kids fly home alone. Kate “loses” her $23, causing a sobbing scene so intense that a pilot gives her $20 just to deplane.
• She later finds her money in her own purse and laughs about having unknowingly hustled the pilot.
• Notable moments:
  • Karen: “The pilot's like, I'll give you 20 bucks to get the hell out.” ([40:45])
• Wry reflection on how “what happens on a plane from Vegas doesn’t count.”

7. “Devil’s Child”: Five-Year-Old Grifter

[42:58 - 46:49]

• Listener A.G. recalls, as a five-year-old, going door to door claiming her brother was sick in order to fund her next candy fix.
• Only one neighbor falls for it—a church lady who, upon learning the truth, brands her a "devil’s child" and says she’s going to hell.
• A.G.’s mom and grandmother laugh it off, but A.G. reflects humorously on the trauma and early goth tendencies.
• Notable quote:
  • “You little liar. You’re the devil’s child and you’re going to hell for what you’ve done.” ([45:45] - Church lady, via A.G.)

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Notable Quotes and Memorable Moments

• Karen: “You just never know what someone else is fucking up to, you know?” ([08:12])
• Georgia (about scammers): “I think they were like... ‘What do rich people do? Sell fucking private planes.’” ([07:16])
• Guest/Caller: “It’s one of these stories that sounds like Catch Me if You Can until you realize it happened in a pediatric ward.” ([16:48])
• Listener S: “I hope that you read this and others learn that shit happens to good people. Fuck politeness and always get a callback number.” ([27:53])

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Hosts’ Tone & Insights

• Comedic, chatty, supportive. Karen and Georgia laugh at the audacity of scammers and also empathize with those who fall for cons (sometimes sharing their own near-misses or family stories).
• They offer occasional practical advice on scam prevention, mixed with humor:
  • “Anytime anyone's rushing you—that's an element of it. Rushing is a big thing.” – Karen ([27:56])
  • “Never pay fines via cash or app. It’s check only, or something fishy is going on!” – Karen/Georgia ([28:34])

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Royal Swindle Tie-Ins

• Multiple playful, dramatized promos for "Royal Swindle" (recap: two Aussie women grift their way into British high society, meet the Queen, and leave a trail of chaos).
• Running gag: “They bad. Bad people. As bad as evil.” ([33:33] and throughout)
• “It’s the rom-com of the summer—it’s Royal Swindle.” – Karen ([47:10])

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Conclusion & Takeaways

The episode delivers a lively mix of scam stories—some harrowing, others hilarious, but all threaded with lessons about skepticism, vulnerability, gullibility, and revenge. It celebrates those who spot a con and comfort those who fall for one, all with Karen and Georgia’s trademark blend of wisecracks and warmth.

Stay sexy and don’t get scammed (or murdered!).

Transcript

[Karen Kilgariff]

This is exactly right.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Two Aussie lesbian lovers touch down in 1990s London and become the toast of British high society. One of them touts an exclusive investment opportunity. And soon the money is rolling in. Rich businessmen and England's horse loving elite fall under their seductive spell. They even meet Queen Elizabeth. But the millionaire duo are concealing a dark past and dastardly intentions. From USG Audio, Blanchard House and Exactly Right Media, this is Royal Swindle. New episodes drop every Thursday. Listen now on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Guest/Caller]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Guest/Caller]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Guest/Caller]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Guest/Caller]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Guest/Caller]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Guest/Caller]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

You know you gotta do it.

[Guest/Caller]

You know you do.

[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Guest/Caller]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

Goodbye.

[Guest/Caller]

Hello and welcome to my favorite Mir to my favorite Murder the Minisode.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And this week we have a very special themed episode for you. We're celebrating Exactly Right's brand new limited series podcast, Right Royal Swindle. It premiered on Thursday, July 23 and

[Guest/Caller]

Royal Swindle tells the story of two fabulously wealthy Australian women who charmed their way into British high societies in the 1990s. But behind all the glamour and country houses, these women are hiding a dark past, some very bad intentions, and a truly wild con.

[Karen Kilgariff]

So in honor of our new show, Royal Swindle, we are gonna be reading all sketches, scammer emails. I love this. This is my favorite theme.

[Guest/Caller]

Let's just change the minisodes to all scammers. Cause I couldn't stop laughing.

[Karen Kilgariff]

There are many podcasts that would have a problem with that. I think if we really got into that space. Do you want to go first? Sure. Do it.

[Guest/Caller]

Okay. Here's a hotel scam story from the employee perspective. Hi. I'll admit I'm not a Day one listener, but I have been listening for a long time to the point where my husband mentioned my love of that murder podcast in our wedding vows.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Oh, my go.

[Guest/Caller]

And had been waiting for the day I'd have something to write in. I just listened to the recent episode about Anna Delvey and cackled at the part where you mentioned all of the hotel staff fighting to take care of her because she tipped so well. Because me and my fellow employees did that once with a woman who turned out to be scamming the hotel.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yes.

[Guest/Caller]

Well, not the hotel directly, but I'll explain. About 10 years ago, I was working at a restaurant that was attached to a hotel. One day, this lady started calling in for room service and tipped at least 20 bucks every time he brought her something. Regardless of how much or how little you. We all noticed because we were money hungry little monsters. And people started fighting over who got to take care of her. Like to the point people would stand by the room service phone just waiting for her to call?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Smart. I mean, and also, have you ever stayed at a hotel where it felt like someone was standing directly by the

[Guest/Caller]

room service phone, like, oh, I didn't think you.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I wasn't ready to order my waffles.

[Guest/Caller]

I don't know what I want. Day two or three of her stay, her daughter came with her kids to stay with her. They told us the daughter got rich recently when she, quote, fell into a job selling private airplanes. I know, I know, it's ridiculous. I can't believe we fell for it. But anyways.

[Karen Kilgariff]

But just really quick.

[Guest/Caller]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Because there's a lot of people who fly on private airplanes, but they don't own the planes.

[Guest/Caller]

But it seems like the daughter sold those planes to the rich people.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yes. I'm just saying, hard job. Because there's not that many who can actually be like, no, no, no, we don't just want to rent the plane for this one trip for an egregious amount of money.

[Guest/Caller]

It's a very specialized field. Probably right by day six or seven. One of the restaurant managers got suspicious and told the hotel manager they should run her credit. It was valid. I assume this is normal practice when someone hits a certain dollar point, but I don't know. They ran the card and it went through, but my manager had a bad feeling and said the hotel manager should call the credit card company to have them reach out to the person who held the account to make sure it was the lady putting charges on the card. So not shockingly, it was a gender neutral name, so we hadn't questioned it. Turns out this lady had met a man at a bar across the street and they decided they wanted to do a little horizontal tangoing. Got a hotel room. The next morning the guy left, but he never checked out of the hotel. As a walk in, there was no checkout date on file, so the room just kept charging the card I have, I walk out all the time. I didn't know you had to check out.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I mean, these days you usually don't.

[Guest/Caller]

Right, like they're gonna kick you out at 11 no matter what.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah, that's right. And you can't charge anything after the time you're kicked out, you know?

[Guest/Caller]

Bet you could.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I guess you could though. Well, I don't know.

[Guest/Caller]

Yeah, maybe not.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I thought we had solved this problem.

[Guest/Caller]

I thought we were done with this. And that's why I'm reading this one. Apparently this lady waited around for and when no one came knocking, she decided to stay. She is a scammer. She got a week long, all expenses paid vacay on this guy's dime. And he didn't have a clue until the credit card company called him. She ended up racking around $4,000 between the room, food and booze. And they wouldn't reverse the charges because they made it clear when he checked in that he would also need to check out.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yes.

[Guest/Caller]

Anyways, turns out the lady had a warrant for her arrest for check fraud. So the cops asked the hotel manager to keep it quiet until they got there so they could ARR. Arrest her. She invited her daughter and grandchildren, like her daughter who sold planes. She said, you've gotta get over here. I have a free fucking room. Let's have a vacation.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Do you think the daughter really does sell planes though? Or do you think they were making up jobs to sound rich?

[Guest/Caller]

I think they were like try to sound Rich. And then she's like, I don't know. What do rich people do? Sell fucking private planes.

[Karen Kilgariff]

You know how rich people fly on private planes? I sell them on private planes.

[Guest/Caller]

I sell them. Someone's gotta sell them. We watched from the parking lot as I took her away. And I gotta say, a lot of us were feeling bad for her. The guy had to press charges and would need to take her to court to get his money back. But don't feel bad for him. He told the hotel he wanted to handle it privately cause he was married. Because he didn't want to have to tell his wife.

[Karen Kilgariff]

He should have to.

[Guest/Caller]

I know. So the moral of the story is, don't cheat on your wife. And always make sure you check out of your hotel room.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Dang.

[Guest/Caller]

My best friend and I were at your Chicago show in November and had an amazing time. We met a bunch of girls at the show who were freaking awesome. And we ended up going out to a couple bars with them after bonding over the love of all things true crime. Love you all so much. Thank you for all the laughing you've brought every one of us listeners, Laura.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Thanks, Laura.

[Guest/Caller]

Thank you, Laura.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That was a great story.

[Guest/Caller]

That is like, you just never know what someone else is fucking up to, you know?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yes. Also, I think all those ways that we can like close and lock the door behind us technologically is like, yes, why, why don't I take three minutes and check out of a hotel? We're very spoiled.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Two Aussie lesbian lovers touch down in 1990s London and become the to British high society. One of them starts touting an exclusive investment opportunity. And soon the money is rolling in. Rich businessmen and England's horse loving elite fall under their seductive spell. They even meet Queen Elizabeth. But the duo are concealing a dark past and dastardly intentions. Evil.

[Guest/Caller]

They were bad.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Bad people as evil.

[Guest/Caller]

Yes, definitely.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Before long, a small town detective gets wind of the duo's exploits and vows to stop them.

[Karen Kilgariff]

She was a thieving scumbag.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Only problem is, these two are exceedingly hard to catch. Decades later, one of them is finally ready to tell all the I sold

[Karen Kilgariff]

my soul to the devil.

[Georgia Hardstark]

From USG Audio, Blanchard House and Exactly Right Media. This is Royal Swindle. New episodes drop every Thursday. Listen now on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Okay, here's my first one. The subject line is 19 year old fake doctor and it's not our guy.

[Guest/Caller]

A lot of these scammers are people like, this is what I Did. It's not like other people scamming. It's so good. They're like they're confessing on themselves.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yes. And it's fun because it's like, listen, everybody. I think when you're young, you like, tell yourself, I'm bad if you do a bad thing. It's like, everyone's bad and everyone's good. Everybody gets into these situations. Like, I'm not saying, please don't steal money.

[Guest/Caller]

Karen's saying, please steal money from people and lie.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I mean, like, it's just the opposite though. It's like when you're young, you have your experiences with that and then you feel the extreme self revulsion after you do it. Like, oh, I guess I'm. I guess I'm a bad person.

[Guest/Caller]

That just means you're human and it's a good sign if you are like a little bit guilty that you did something shitty. Yes, that's a good sign.

[Karen Kilgariff]

But yeah, pay people back and say sorry.

[Guest/Caller]

Right.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Somebody calls in. Karen stole $20 out of my purse. Okay.

[Guest/Caller]

But she said sorry.

[Karen Kilgariff]

But she said sorry. 50 years later. Hi, Karen of Georgia and all the amazing people at Exactly. Right. Heart shape, heart emoji. Sorry.

[Guest/Caller]

Heart shaped emoji.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It's shaped like a heart. I've been a day one listener since February of 2020. Ugh, the dark days. Jesus. When I discovered your show and immediately went back to listen from the very beginning, it took me about six months to catch up. And during the time you were with me through Covid, buying my first house, getting divorced and selling that same house, meeting the love of my life, and having our son who somehow is already two years old. Aw, quite an arc. Thank you for being there through so many of the biggest moments of my life. All the high and lows in between. I'm from Denmark and English is not my first language, so please excuse any errors, grammar. Well, there's the first one. Errors, grammar.

[Guest/Caller]

Did you highlight. You should highlight and circle that and we'll send it back to her in red.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Errors, grammar. Okay. It says, more specifically, they're from a town in the suburbs of Copenhagen called.

[Guest/Caller]

You got it.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Vitrovra. Yeah, Vitrovra. But look at the way it's spelled.

[Guest/Caller]

H V. Yeah, that sounds right. Oh, Vitrovra. Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Okay, got it. The story I'm about to tell you is a true hometown story for me. In the summer of 2019, a 19 year old man walked into Vitrovra Hospital just outside Copenhagen. Now I'm mispronouncing Copenhagen wearing a white lab coat and claiming to be a medical student. For about a month, he moved between hospital departments, examined patients, wrote medical records, and even prescribed medication. Despite having no medical training at all. Doctors, nurses, patients and families all believed he belonged there.

[Guest/Caller]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Why? Tall, white, blonde. One of his patients.

[Guest/Caller]

I think that's all they have in Copenhagen. That's true.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I think that's the only flavor then is what's the. Where's the privilege? Where's the prejudice? One of his patients was a six month old baby girl. He examined her, prescribed medication, and sent her home. When she didn't improve, her parents returned to the hospital a few days later, where a real doctor diagnosed her with pneumonia and treated her successfully. Things got even weirder. One day he walked up to an ambulance parked outside the hospital and told the EMTs, have to leave right now. There's been a hanging, as you can imagine. That's never how an ambulance is sent to an emergency. The doctor runs down with a note, let's go. That always comes through the emergency dispatch center. When the EMTs didn't react to the guy's orders, he walked off. The EMTs went in and sounded the alarm. And the next time the guy showed up at the hospital, he was arrested for suspicion of fraud. He went on to be investigated, tried and later convicted. During the trial, it was revealed how he was not a medical student. In fact, he had not made it into med school that year. He just really badly wanted to be a doctor. It had been his lifelong dream.

[Guest/Caller]

My lifelong dream. But not enough to try harder, not

[Karen Kilgariff]

enough to study well, enough to pass tests or be a good doctor. I just wanna do it. And I don't care how good or bad I am at it.

[Guest/Caller]

I feel that way about podcasting.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah, just get it done.

[Guest/Caller]

I just want to do it.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And if people die, they die. He was convicted of impersonating a medical professional and practicing medicine without authorization because he received a relatively short sentence. Danish media have never published his identity due to a court ordered reporting restriction and Danish press ethics surrounding criminal cases with short sentences.

[Guest/Caller]

They're so fair there.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I mean, they're. They're doing it right.

[Guest/Caller]

So boring.

[Karen Kilgariff]

His sentence. His sentence, you ask? 30 days of suspended imprisonment and 40 hours of community service. He walked out of court a free man. What's that?

[Guest/Caller]

Community service, shopping.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Stay away from the blood drive. And that's somehow not the craziest part of the story. We're not there yet. The following year, he was admitted to medical school.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Oh, no.

[Guest/Caller]

Really, like, fair and square.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Today he isn't Pretending anymore. He's actually studying medicine and could eventually graduate and work as a physician in Denmark. Well, guess what? And maybe this is. I'm saying this from the luxury of being in America and not in Denmark. He really wanted it.

[Guest/Caller]

He's gonna be a better doctor. He's either gonna be the best doctor ever or the worst one. And we won't know because they didn't give his name. I feel like in an impersonation case, we should have the name of the impersonator for future reference.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I mean, at least could the hospital administrator have the name of the impersonator? Just so they know where they're standing.

[Guest/Caller]

Totally.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Is it that. Did he go back to the same. Well, let me finish.

[Guest/Caller]

I won't.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Guess I'll just read. Danish universities do not require applicants to submit a criminal record certificate. By the time he applies for employment as a doctor, the conviction may no longer appear on his criminal record, depending on the applicable disclosure rules and how much time has passed. That means the families he deceived, including the parents of that baby, could theoretically one day meet him again, this time with him wearing the white coat, legally. That's crazy. The whole story has sparked years of debate here in Denmark, not only about his actions, but about hospital security, accountability, rehabilitation, and whether some professions should have stricter background checks than they currently do.

[Guest/Caller]

Yeah, because also, like, if he had been an actual doctor and had been, like, lying about what he knew, he would have been disbarred. But instead, he's allowed to go on to be a doctor. Like, it just feels like he's a scammer. He should be.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That would be so wrong of him to do as a doctor that he would not be able to be a lawyer.

[Guest/Caller]

Right, because he's just barred.

[Karen Kilgariff]

No, I know what you mean.

[Guest/Caller]

Disbarred from being adopted, but whatever.

[Karen Kilgariff]

No, you're completely right. And also, it's the ethical thing of, like, do you want a person that's working on you that's like, well, if I can cheat and scam my way through whatever we're doing, let's do it that way.

[Guest/Caller]

It should be their choice.

[Karen Kilgariff]

The.

[Guest/Caller]

The person. The patients.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yes.

[Guest/Caller]

The lawyers. The lawyer doctor.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Okay, so it says it's one of these stories that sounds like Catch Me if youf can until you realize it happened in a pediatric ward. Thank you for an amazing show and for being some really cool older sisters, cousins, aunties, sharing important stories with me and all your listeners. What you do is important and significant to all of us. Oh, my God. And that's someone in Denmark.

[Guest/Caller]

Wow.

[Karen Kilgariff]

They don't like anybody. SSDGM. Just kidding. I don't know what they do in Denmark. SSDGM Yasmine or Yasmin. Nps. If you ever come to Denmark, please let me know. I'd love to go to a show or be your tour guide.

[Guest/Caller]

All right.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Love it. And we go to that hospital first and we all wear different white coats and see who can get the furthest into the staff.

[Guest/Caller]

It's you. Like I don't even have to.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Could I do it?

[Guest/Caller]

I'll get far into the cafeteria, get a bunch of free food.

[Karen Kilgariff]

But you could be a lunch lady with all your. Here's me as a doctor. A nuclear fist. Yes. I'll take the temperature.

[Guest/Caller]

I'm having a new kind of hot flash. That's my scalp is hot flashing.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Only loving it.

[Guest/Caller]

Can we get the air?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Get two hats some air.

[Guest/Caller]

Look what I have for my purse. Two hats. Is that a beanie Girl?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Slay all day, sweat all day. That's so cute and small, isn't it?

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah. You want it?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah.

[Guest/Caller]

Okay.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I really like it.

[Guest/Caller]

You can have it.

[Karen Kilgariff]

This can just be the standing hot flash fan.

[Guest/Caller]

Yes, absolutely.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Just to let people know and maybe we start bringing up like a graphic that's like hot flash blinking on the bottom. And then you can call in. If we're having a hot flash, you can call the 800 number and win. And win a bunch of Tiger Balm. Now you can see what it feels like to be a lady.

[Guest/Caller]

You fuck.

[Karen Kilgariff]

You fucking asshole.

[Guest/Caller]

Oh, there's also rage.

[Karen Kilgariff]

There's the rage and Braid Fog.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Two Aussie lesbian lovers touch down in 1990s London and become the toast of British high society. One of them starts touting an exclusive investment opportunity. And soon the money is rolling in. Rich businessmen and England's horse loving elite fall under their seductive spell. They even meet Queen Elizabeth. But the duo are concealing a dark past and dastardly intentions. Evil.

[Guest/Caller]

They were Bad.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Bad people. As bad as evil.

[Guest/Caller]

Yes, definitely.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Before long, a small town detective gets wind of the duo's exploits and vows to stop them.

[Karen Kilgariff]

She was a thieving scumbag.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Only problem is, these two are exceedingly hard to catch. Decades later, one of them is finally ready to tell all the I sold

[Karen Kilgariff]

my soul to the devil.

[Georgia Hardstark]

From USG Audio, Blanchard House and Exactly Right Media. This is Royal Swindle. New episodes drop every Thursday. Listen now on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Guest/Caller]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

Or even worse, what do I make for dinner?

[Guest/Caller]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Guest/Caller]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Guest/Caller]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Guest/Caller]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Guest/Caller]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Guest/Caller]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Guest/Caller]

Goodbye. Okay, I am not stupid and neither are you. Red flag alert. So this is a real one like a warning one which is so great. Georgia and Karen Formal I am writing to you with tears still in my eyes after being the victim of falling victim to I don't like that at all as it puts the power in the hands of the wrongdoers. So being the unwitting Participant of a scam. I hope that by sharing I can help other people pleasers from going through what I just went through for the last three hours. Oh, God. We had one in Italy, a scammer. Vince got a text saying. Cause we drove. We got a car and drove that he had a ticket and he went to pay it. They don't do it like that. They don't text you about your ticket.

[Karen Kilgariff]

They won't personally text you.

[Guest/Caller]

I was surprised. Vince's.

[Karen Kilgariff]

He just wanted to take care of business. And yeah, he's.

[Guest/Caller]

Yeah, he's. So. Okay. I received a phone call this afternoon from a police officer who proceeded to spell his name and give me his badge number. After I spec. Asked regarding my failure to show up to jury selection several months ago, I was given two citation numbers and two separate fines. Being the aforementioned people pleaser, I was terrified of getting in trouble. So I immediately said, oh, I'm so sorry. I must have missed the notice. Now, to be clear, I actually did get a notice and I did not attend the selection poll. I know, I know it's wrong, and I knew it was wrong. But insert excuses here. Alas, here we are. So you might understand that when the officer brought that up, I thought, fuck, I've been caught.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yep.

[Guest/Caller]

He proceeded to provide instructions. That's why they do it that way.

[Georgia Hardstark]

I know.

[Guest/Caller]

Because one out of every 10 person. I mean, more than that, probably, I

[Karen Kilgariff]

would say 7 out of 10.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

People. That's all people do is try to get out of jury duty. No one's like us, where they're just like, let me get down there. That's so fun.

[Guest/Caller]

I mean, yeah. He proceeded to provide instruction that I was not to get off the phone with him. Red flag number one. A couple of these I read. Don't hang up the phone or we're coming for you.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

They said, yeah, the people that are from jury duty.

[Guest/Caller]

Right.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Don't hang up the phone. This is the most important way we're gonna communicate with you.

[Guest/Caller]

Right. We can't call you back.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Yeah.

[Guest/Caller]

And that if I did, I would have a warrant issued for my arrest for civil disruption. That's fucking scary. Secondly, I must immediately pay $250 per citation in cash. And then it says, my cheeks start to redden. Yes. Flag number two. Then I must stay online while I drive to the sheriff's office, which I didn't get to because I was instructed to pull over and complete the transaction over the phone. Yes. A flag to sign a document noting that I agreed to pay the Fee. So you pay the fee and then they're like, but go to the sheriff's office. Cause that seems legit, right?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Exactly. They're sending you to the place where they would never want you to be to talk about what's actually happening to you.

[Guest/Caller]

Totally. Now you ask, why did I not run away? Why did I not hang up? And then it says in all caps, why did I pay them from the Cash app? Then my Apple pay in excess of $1,000 after they couldn't accept the funds because, and here's the no surprise kicker, I was scared.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah.

[Guest/Caller]

I am, with the above exception, a law abiding citizen. I don't think you could call yourself that.

[Karen Kilgariff]

But that's how they getcha. You're guilty. You know you did bad. You're not one of those people that doesn't care.

[Guest/Caller]

I have three kids and I teach them right and wrong. And I knew that I had done wrong. These scammers preyed upon that and held me hostage on the phone. And I went with it. Too afraid to be arrested in front of my family, too afraid to have a record, too afraid to get in trouble. Yes, I was lucky. And my bank did alert me to the fraud, which when I said out loud, the officer told me it was because it was the first time I'd used the app. And I believed him because it was. I ended up driving to the bank with the ill advised intent to transfer funds from them to law enforcement directly. However, when I walked in the doors at the bank, it dawned on me and my husband, with whom I was texting, that this was no real deal. And I said, still on the phone with them. Can I speak to the sheriff? She's still on the phone with them.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah.

[Guest/Caller]

Going to transfer funds because none of the other apps worked. They all worked. So it's thousands of dollars. Like Vince, when he put his credit card. None of them would work. The credit cards, they didn't accept that one.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Entering information and password immediately cancel all his cards.

[Guest/Caller]

I know. And when they put me on hold, I told a bank employee, I think I'm actively being scammed. And they hung up. I write this as someone who listens to you ladies on a weekly basis and has for years. I am a woman of a certain age. Ew. And consider myself. I didn't see. That's them. Ew.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Ew.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Ew. Ew. Oh, I thought she said, I'm a woman of a certain age. You.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Oh.

[Guest/Caller]

I mean, I guess we all are either way. And consider myself reasonably informed. We watch true Crime docuseries featuring regular people listen to podcasts, et cetera, with people who might have known better. And I'm here to tell you that these scammers are professionals. They know their demographic. They are smart. They have a narrative in place. And though I hope you never find yourself crying at the bank after believing that a law enforcement officer has contacted you and you might be arrested for non compliance, you are actually all good. These people are relentless. I want to share the scam, which I'm sure happened all too often, but also remind those that may have participated with regret that you are not at fault. These people are skilled con artists. They know the game and put you in as an unwitting player. I would advise myself and anyone else to tell such a caller. Thank you for letting me know. I will be in touch. It is always okay to trust and verify. I hope that you read this and others learn that shit happens to good people. Fuck politeness and always get a callback number. S. Yeah, but even the callback number, right?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Even the callback number. But here's the thing that just popped into my head is you can also do the thing anytime anyone's rushing you. You know, that's an element of it. Rushing is a big thing. But you can just do a thing where you talk as if you're normally talking and hang up on yourself mid sentence and it looks like you got cut off. Then you see what they do because they can't blame you for getting cut off. You didn't, you know, whatever. And then it's like. And then are they calling you back crazy? Is it like whatever also? I think. And I could completely be wrong. So maybe there are people who like, work at county offices who know. I think, isn't it when you have to pay stuff like that, it's like, check only.

[Guest/Caller]

Yeah. There's no way it'll ever be cash.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Or like never. Cash only.

[Guest/Caller]

Cash only. Or even an app. I can't.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Like, what if they were like, cash only or any weed you have? Or just like this Seems fake, But okay.

[Guest/Caller]

Our McDonald's coupons this morning too.

[Karen Kilgariff]

The Christmas book.

[Guest/Caller]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Legend. Okay. That was amazing and great takeaway for everybody. Okay. The subject line of this email is, my grandma helped expose a pyramid scheme in the 80s.

[Guest/Caller]

Wow.

[Karen Kilgariff]

All the things I love. Greetings MFM gang. My girlfriend has been bugging me to write this email since we went out to dinner with my grandmother several months ago. But now we finally have a free moment to write it. So here you go. My dad's Mom Sylvia is a very Southern lady. During the 80s, she was about a single mother of five living in Charlotte, North Carolina. Single mother of five, a living saint. At the time, she was working as the sales manager for the local Sheraton Hotel. And she was really good at her job. I mean, she was like the top producing sales manager in the whole country. So when the people at the top saw this, they offered her a new position as the national sales manager without a raise. And then in. In parentheses, it says, fuck you. Corporate sexism.

[Guest/Caller]

Offering you a new position, a higher position.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And you can't say, no, no raise, right? Cause they're like, you can take the position at your. What a time in the 80s. Later that month, she was at a social event and was approached by a man named Thomas McColgan, who offered her a job at his company that paid way more than she was already making. The company was called IBC Arabian Investments, and it was a company that allowed people to purchase Arabian horses in full. So, like when the horse was pregnant, as stock, supposedly after the baby horses were born and several years old, they could be sold again as a return on the initial investment. The selling point to this idea was that people invested in small groups, about 10 people. So a share was only one tenth of the price. So it's like time. Time shares, Yes. A horse timeshare.

[Guest/Caller]

Okay, sounds legit.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I want the hair on his. I want his name. This scheme was largely targeting middle class people who would not normally invest in something like Arabian horses among us. I mean, so my grandmother agreed to work for him and over the course of a year, traveled all around the western United States. She stayed in condos in Las Vegas, went to exotic horse auctions in Flagstaff, Arizona, and even once flew with my dad and aunt to California on company money. Thomas McColgan had been paying Price Waterhouse to do the corporate taxes for IBC Arabian. When he presented the business plan to the potential investors, he had to show them the financials of his business so the investors could see that they were what they were getting into. Once, while she was in Las Vegas shooting a commercial for IBC with Wayne Newton. And then just a bunch of question marks and exclamation points, My grandma received a call from her co worker back in Charlotte. Her co worker had said that Thomas asked her to go all around Charlotte and look for a typeface font that matched her, that of Pricewaterhouse. Thomas McColgan was forging financial documents to show to his investors to get money. It was later found out that he actually Used money from investors to buy more horses. Very illegal, because that money is not supposed to be touched for years. Yes, that's the classic Ponzi scheme. When my grandma found out about all of this, she immediately left the video shoot with Wayne Newton.

[Guest/Caller]

This is bullshit and you know it.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Even you, Wayne Newton, can't keep me here.

[Guest/Caller]

Shame on you, Wayne.

[Karen Kilgariff]

This is.

[Georgia Hardstark]

God.

[Guest/Caller]

How much were they paying Wayne?

[Karen Kilgariff]

I mean, just to come on and be like, that guy was amazing. Yeah. Anytime you want to shoot that commercial,

[Guest/Caller]

though, I guess it didn't get filmed.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Do you like Arabian horses? Or maybe I'm thinking of. Who's the guy from the morning show? I'm thinking of Regis Philbin. I'm so sorry. Okay, so she flew back to North Carolina on her own money. So Thomas did not see that she bought a plane ticket back. Very smart. She called Pricewaterhouse and set up a discreet meeting in a hotel lobby in Charlotte. When she told the person she met with about what she heard, they said that Thomas was about to get in big trouble. My grandma did not testify in court because she was only involved in the sales part of the business. Thomas McColgan was found guilty of securities fraud, and my grandma has not heard from him since. She described him as an egomaniac and a stupid, greedy man. My grandma went on to work for the state of North Carolina, fighting for women's rights and even helping write new legislation on sexual assault laws.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Wow.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Needless to say, my grandmother is a badass, powerful, caring woman, and I love her and all of her stories so much. I mean, incredible. Stay sexy and don't invest in horses, because it's probably a pyramid scheme. Bert.

[Guest/Caller]

Okay, but what happened to the Arabian ponies?

[Karen Kilgariff]

They're just trotting around looking for investors. It's so sad.

[Guest/Caller]

So sad. Wayne Newton's just like, what are we doing?

[Karen Kilgariff]

One little foal has a PowerPoint presentation. Come on. Believe in us.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Invest. Two Aussie lesbian lovers touched down in 1990 London and become the toast of British high society. One of them starts touting an exclusive investment opportunity. And soon the money is rolling in. Rich businessmen and England's horse loving elite fall under their seductive spell. They even meet Queen Elizabeth. But the duo are concealing a dark past and dastardly intentions. Evil. They bad bad people. As bad as evil.

[Guest/Caller]

Yes, definitely.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Before long, a small town detective gets wind of the duo's exploits and vows to stop them.

[Karen Kilgariff]

She was a thieving scumbag.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Only problem is, these two are exceedingly hard to catch. Decades later, one of them is finally ready to tell all I Sold My Soul to the Devil From USG Audio, Blanchard House and Exactly Right Media. This is Royal Swindle. New episodes drop every Thursday. Listen now on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Guest/Caller]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Guest/Caller]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Guest/Caller]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Guest/Caller]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Guest/Caller]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Guest/Caller]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Guest/Caller]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

We've talked about article for a long time. There are pieces in that catalog that are so affordable that are room changers and if you go through there and there's like a little something you don't even realize you need until you see how they have stuff set up or what style combinations that they're doing with they do the boho chic, there's mid century, it's a little bit modern, it's something new. Like there's so many choices in there and it's not going to break the bank.

[Guest/Caller]

As someone who's interested in tons of different styles and time periods, article covers them all in one place. I love that.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I know I've mentioned already how much I love my entryway table. But I swear to God, because the path that it's on, my path it four times a day and I love it more every time.

[Guest/Caller]

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[Karen Kilgariff]

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[Guest/Caller]

That's article.com murder for $50 off your first purchase of $100 or more.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Goodbye.

[Guest/Caller]

Okay, here's my last one. I was a preteen con artist. Hey ladies. This story has everything. A trash mom, a mystery, an inappropriate joke. So let's get started.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Hell yes.

[Guest/Caller]

The year is 1996 and my mother decided the perfect family vacation for my brother, 10 and me, 12, would be a trip to Vegas. I've been there as a child. But why you might ask? Well, her live in boyfriend at the time loved to gamble.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Wayne Newton.

[Guest/Caller]

The movie Casino had just come out and he was obsessed to the point that he had bought a roll out craps table to play at. Oh, red flag, everybody.

[Karen Kilgariff]

He likes Robert De Niro.

[Guest/Caller]

He's teaching these children how to gamble.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Casino is an amazing movie though because Don Rickles plays a pretty big part and it's so good.

[Guest/Caller]

Great outtakes. So yeah, my mom booked her boyfriend's dream vacation and dragged my brother and I along. Ugh, single mom's boyfriends. You just don't really get over it.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah, because your mom's forced into a bit of a pick me situation that like you just subconsciously understand, but factually understand.

[Guest/Caller]

I don't remember every single one update. This relationship did not stand the test of time.

[Georgia Hardstark]

No.

[Karen Kilgariff]

What?

[Guest/Caller]

I still see the trip through my jerk 12 year old eyes. I get it so much more now that I have a 12 year old daughter of my own. But I have to admit, we had a good time. My mom did a great job of finding the kid friendly fun Vegas had to offer. Plus we ate at buffets and got to swim a ton. A kid's dream.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That's all that matters.

[Guest/Caller]

It really was a fun place to be when you were a kid. It's like this is sketchy as fuck and I love it. And just meet all these fucking like free range kids.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yes.

[Guest/Caller]

Whose parents are like also Las Vegas parents. That's right.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I mean, what a mix.

[Guest/Caller]

It was pretty great. One of my favorite memories is when my mother let my brother and I walk the strip alone at night while they gambled. The 90s, man.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Jesus.

[Guest/Caller]

Well, they had each other. I think I've heard that before.

[Karen Kilgariff]

They're Getting lit.

[Guest/Caller]

Stick with each other.

[Karen Kilgariff]

They're getting those sex pamphlets from the guys at Randy, who definitely got no, thank you.

[Guest/Caller]

So my mother had scheduled for my brother and I to fly back a few days early so she could have alone time with her boyfriend. Ew. I mean, letting us wander the city streets while she gambled in the casino had to have been stressful.

[Karen Kilgariff]

One would hope.

[Guest/Caller]

Anyway, so my brother and I flew on our own, with the plan being that my dad would pick us up at the airport back home. The flight was pretty uneventful until we landed. While we were sitting and waiting to get off the plane, I checked to make sure that the $23 I had left from my trip spending money was still in my purse, only to find it was done. Done, done. Missing, stolen. That amount of money might not seem like a big deal, but that's $44.32 in today's moolah.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Thank you. Well done. Well done.

[Guest/Caller]

And I was 12. It might as well have been $44,000. So I proceeded to lose my shit. Sobbing, snotting, hyperventilating. But the worst part, I refused to get off the plane until the money was found. The stewardesses were literally begging me to deplane. And yes, that was until the pilot came out to see what was going on. Once he heard the story, he pulled out a crisp $20 bill and put it in my psychotic little tween hand. I magically calmed after that and made my way off the plane.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Pilot's like, I'll give you 20 bucks to get the hell out.

[Guest/Caller]

We're trying to fucking go home to our families.

[Karen Kilgariff]

We have 52 more flights today.

[Guest/Caller]

From there, we were escorted by the airport employee over to my dad waiting for us outside the terminal. The employee looked at me and. And asked, is this your dad? Well, apparently I was riding high on the mayhem I had just caused from the plane, because I looked at her and dryly joked, I've never seen this man before in my life. She's got a cigarette. I didn't know she was. She's picked it up in Vegas, and

[Karen Kilgariff]

then she's got the 20 tucked behind her ear on the other side.

[Guest/Caller]

She looked shocked, my dad looked pissed. And I just stood there laughing hysterically. I've never seen this man a day in my life.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Also, punish the dad for letting him. Let the mother take you to Vegas.

[Guest/Caller]

To all. Eventually, the whole thing was sorted out and we headed off home with my still fuming dad. You might wonder what happened to that $23 that somehow went missing. Well, on the drive back from the airport, I thought to unzip the little inside pocket of my esprit purse only to find my not so missing money safely hidden inside. That's right. I caught net pilot out of a fresh $20 and almost doubled my money. Jackpot. Question mark, question mark, question mark.

[Karen Kilgariff]

They really absorbed something in Las Vegas. They knew how to do it.

[Guest/Caller]

Well, keep doing what you're doing in every way. As a thoroughly medicated and therapized person, I appreciate all of the light you shine on mental health. Without help, I might still be throwing bits on planes. We can't have that. Maybe I'll write in some stories about my mom next. She may have been a 90s trash mom, but she was also a criminal attorney for 40 years. Is that how she met this gambling boyfriend?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah. Really? I could have sworn the boyfriend stole the money out of the little kid's purse. I'm like, that's kind of the dirt baggiest way to end it, right? And it's kind of fun.

[Guest/Caller]

Gail has seen some shit. Love to you all. Stay sexy. And what happens on a plane from Vegas doesn't count.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Kate with a C. Incredible Kate. God damn. Someone will give me $20.

[Guest/Caller]

It's such a big sister move too. Yeah, although I could see a little sister doing that too.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I mean, it's just gutsy. And then. And she got her money.

[Guest/Caller]

She did.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Okay, here's my last one. Kind of similar. The subject line of this email is the Devil's child and it says, hey, badass bitches. And Steven. When I was five years old, a Jiffy Mart opened in our tiny town not far from our house. And it created quite the impression on me. If you're not familiar with them, a Jiffy Mart is just a convenience store. So not really that exciting. But to a five year old, candy obsessed me. It was everything. We only went one time to check it out and my mom let me purchase a package of sixlets. Little round candy coated balls of chocolate. Have you ever had a sixlet?

[Guest/Caller]

I can't think I have. I can't pick them.

[Karen Kilgariff]

It was like the Hydrox to M and M's. Oreo. Got it. So they were round, but they were

[Guest/Caller]

basically M and M's.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And also the package was like a little tube. So interesting. Inferior to M and M's for sure. But again, I was five. Yeah, that's right. Well after I had that bag of chocolatey dipped red dye number five treasures, they were all I could think about. How on earth would I ever get the money to get more. And then I had it. The brilliant, foolproof plan to go door to door in my neighborhood telling people my little brother was sick and he and we needed money for his medicine.

[Guest/Caller]

Oh my God. It's like a Facebook scam. Before there's Facebook.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yep, there's a living five year old GoFundMe scam.

[Guest/Caller]

What's wrong with that plan? Nothing in the child's mind.

[Karen Kilgariff]

I'm going to take this to the neighborhood and see if they want me to have Scotland sixlets, because I think they do and or my brother to get better. Okay. And then it says, yep, I was a five year old grifter. Shockingly, no one was taking the bait. They'd simply look at me strangely and say, go home. Then I came to her house. The weirdo church lady at the end of the block. I didn't know much about her, but I knew church people love to do things for others. So I forged ahead. After my little spiel, she felt so terrible for me that she cleaned out her change purse and I traipsed home, hands brimming with coins. Feels so good. I wasn't stupid enough to let my mom know what I had done, so I did what any 5 year old would do. I hid behind the chair in the living room to count the money. Almost immediately, my mom was onto me. I guess watching me sneak behind a piece of furniture and the sound of clinking coins was a dead giveaway. Where did you get that? She asked me. I've had it, I said unconvincingly. Within minutes, she had the whole story out of me. And because we were also church people, I was told I had to return the money, apologize, and tell the woman what I had done.

[Guest/Caller]

Yeah, you do.

[Karen Kilgariff]

So my mom drove me to the end of the block and made me get out by myself. All caps. I trembled my way to the door, and when she answered, I blubbered and cried and apologized and admitted my lie. Church lady's eyes flared with anger, and instead of the pat on my head I expected, I was met with this. You little liar. You're the devil's child and you're going to hell for what you've done.

[Guest/Caller]

Oh my God.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That's like every nun in my grammar school. And then she slammed the door in my tiny face, sobbing. I turned to my mother, who was still in the car, and showed her the money and shrugged. Like, what do I do now?

[Guest/Caller]

She didn't take the money?

[Karen Kilgariff]

No, she.

[Guest/Caller]

Okay, it's yours now.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Too busy screaming at her. She yelled at me to leave it on the porch and when I got back in the car, I told her what the woman said in shock herself. My mom took me home and got on the phone with my grandmother to tell her about the escapade. While they laughed and laugh, confused and traumatized, I tried to find the humor in it too. Stay sexy and don't scam your neighbors. A g her.

[Guest/Caller]

I was hoping she'd somehow get the six and what are they called?

[Karen Kilgariff]

Cichlids.

[Guest/Caller]

Like get cichlids out of it. Like her mom would feel bad that she got screamed at by a psychotic woman.

[Karen Kilgariff]

If it was 2026, they'd get on like TikTok and then Six Litz would be like, we're at don't worry, we got you covered.

[Guest/Caller]

There'd be a ring, doorbell, camera, the whole fucking thing.

[Karen Kilgariff]

But this instead, this one's like, maybe I am a devil child and carries that into adulthood.

[Guest/Caller]

Becomes a total goth.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Yeah, thank God another goth is made.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Thankfully.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Well, that was our scam show. Let's read the ending to celebrate Royal Swindle.

[Guest/Caller]

Let's read the ending. Royal Swindle is out now. New episodes will be released weekly on Thursdays and please follow Royal Swindle now on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts from.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Blanchard House, Exactly Right Media and USD Audio. It's the rom com of the summer. It's Royal Swindle.

[Guest/Caller]

Stay sexy and don't get murdered. Goodbye Elvis. Do you want a cookie?

[Karen Kilgariff]

This has been an Exactly Right production.

[Guest/Caller]

Our senior producer is Molly Smith and our associate producer is Tessa Hughes.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Our editor is Aristotle Acevedo.

[Guest/Caller]

This episode was mixed by Liana Squillace.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Email your hometowns to my favorite murdermail.com

[Guest/Caller]

follow the show on Instagram at My Favorite Murder.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Listen to my favorite murder on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Pocket Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Guest/Caller]

And now you can watch My favorite Murder on Netflix.

[Karen Kilgariff]

And when you're there, hit the double thumbs up and the remind me buttons. That's the best way you can support our show. Goodbye.

[Georgia Hardstark]

Two Aussie lesbian lovers touch down in 1990s London and become the toast of British high society society. One of them touts an exclusive investment opportunity. And soon the money is rolling in. Rich businessmen and England's horse loving elite fall under their seductive spell. They even meet Queen Elizabeth. But the millionaire duo are concealing a dark past and dastardly intentions. From USG Audio, Blanchard House and Exactly Right Media. This is Royal Swindle New episodes drop every Thursday. Listen now on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Guest/Caller]

The best time to think about home security is before you need it.

[Karen Kilgariff]

That's exactly why there's SimpliSafe.

[Guest/Caller]

Traditional home security only alerts you after a break in has already happened and that's too late. Simplisafe is changing that.

[Karen Kilgariff]

SimpliSafe's US based live agents identify threats on your property and help deter them. So intruder never get to your house.

[Guest/Caller]

The system is customizable so you can build one that fits your home and your specific needs.

[Karen Kilgariff]

The 247 professional monitoring is effective and affordable and won't lock you into a long term contract.

[Guest/Caller]

I think that's what's so scary for so many people is that long term contract and like whatever turns out you don't like it or need it, but they don't have that because they know you'll like it and you'll know that you need it and feel so much safer when you have it. Like at this point in my life I would never go without a security system on my house. I just feel safer with actually having Simplisafe around.

[Karen Kilgariff]

There's a whole staff at Simplisafe that's waiting to talk to you and help you out. Right now you can get 50% off your new system by visiting simplisafe.com mfm that's half [e-mail] mfm there's no safe like SimpliSafe.

[Guest/Caller]

Goodbye Chief Caribbean's jet set July sale

[Karen Kilgariff]

is here right now. Save $200 on vacation packages of four nights or more with promo code 200BEACH

[Guest/Caller]

whether you're dreaming of Cancun, Jamaica or the Dominican Republic, your next vacay just got more affordable.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Don't let summer pass you by without the beach.

[Guest/Caller]

Use promo COD200 beach and get more sand for your dollar.

[Karen Kilgariff]

Head to CheapCaribbean.com today to book your beach vacay.

[Guest/Caller]

Goodbye.