Podcast Summary: "Delivert: We Solved Barbershop Homophobia"

My Momma Told Me
Hosts: Langston Kerman & David Gborie
Guest: Dewayne Perkins
Release Date: October 28, 2025

Episode Overview

In this lively and insightful episode of "My Momma Told Me," comedians Langston Kerman and David Gborie are joined by the hilarious and sharp Dewayne Perkins (comedian, writer, actor known for "The Blackening" and more) for a deep dive into the Black barbershop: why homophobia persists in that space, whether it’s solvable, and how the hyper-masculine rituals of the barbershop shape Black male identity and intimacy. The group explores personal stories, Black “conspiracy theories,” masculinity, economic realities, and, of course, some wild banter about haircuts, childhood traumas, and being “fresh.” Dewayne proposes both a social critique and a path to evolution for the barbershop.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Black Barbershop and Homophobia

(18:10 – 22:38)

• Dewayne’s Theory: "Barbers have to be homophobic." He describes barbershop homophobia as both a norm and survival tactic within an intimate, masculine space.
  • Quote: “Barbershops, like football teams and churches, are the most homoerotic spaces…so you have to have homophobia as a counter. If it’s not there, I think then they will all turn gay.” —Dewayne Perkins (20:26)
• Observation: The barbershop involves unique intimacy—facial touching, proximity—which straight men rarely experience from other men, leading to both camaraderie and awkward, defensive banter.
• Comedy ensues as the trio discuss “fitting in” by pretending interest in stereotypically straight topics or activities, and feigning homophobia to maintain social status in the shop.

2. Hypermasculinity, Role Play, and Rituals

(20:43 – 23:48; 55:22 – 56:16)

• The hosts note barbershops demand ritual performances of masculinity, ironically rendering them “very gay” in terms of intimacy and grooming obsession.
  • Quote: “If the homophobia wasn’t there, it would be a bathhouse.” —Dewayne Perkins (22:33)
• Dewayne points out the double standards: the real “gayest thing” Black men do is their near-religious devotion to hair care and aesthetics.
  • Quote: “We kind of mask [lack of bravery] in this constant need to have an aesthetic—not knowing that’s actually the gayest thing you could do.” (55:41)

3. Can Barbershop Homophobia Be Solved?

(35:38 – 44:43)

• Dewayne floats a bold solution: letting more men “experiment sexually, so they know if they like it or not,” reducing homophobic anxiety.
  • Quote: “If you just try some gay shit and really don’t like it, then you can kind of just sit in that…. It’s not that deep.” (36:18)
• The “Kissing Booth” Proposal: David jokes about a barbershop certification requiring kissing a man (37:15).
• The group debates whether barbershops can lead such social evolution; Langston is skeptical, David sees it as a conversation equalizer.
• Dewayne shares hope from a recent barbershop exchange that shut down classist comments but acknowledges anti-vax and other conspiracies proliferate, showing both growth and limits.

4. The Economic Reality & Power Structures of the Barbershop

(50:00 – 53:03)

• The escalating cost of haircuts and lack of industrial regulation is a hot topic.
  • Quote: “Appointments at Black barbershops are general guidelines… The prices are getting out of control.” —Langston (48:31, 49:59)
• All share frustration at “time bandit” barbers—phone distractions, excessive conversation, lateness—and the rising complexity of services and add-ons.
• Langston fantasizes about a “Starbucks of barbershops”: standardized, affordable, and less chaos.

5. The Psychology of Freshness and Repetition

(53:28 – 56:16)

• Black men’s high frequency of cuts may fuel barber power and shop dynamics.
  • Quote: “If they know you are coming back—supply and demand—the demand is too high so they don’t have to change the prices… That’s why there’s so much pressure on starting a new [barber] relationship.” —Langston (53:50)
• Dewayne suggests real bravery would be being okay with “being a little ugly for a little bit,” subverting the endless drive for grooming.

6. Simulation Conspiracies, True Power, and Society

(68:01 – 78:52)

• Listener voicemail introduces a “real life simulation” theory—an elite few tweak social/programmatic “dominoes”—sparking a Matrix-themed tangent.
• The hosts riff on politicians as “bad guy Neos and Morpheuses,” discuss whether the “simulation overlords” are obsessed with the next human evolution, and connect this mindset to unchecked capitalism and AI development.
  • Quote, Dewayne: “They are trying to get to the point of—what is the limit of human nature? Because they’re at the pinnacle and they get to decide…what else is there?” (77:27)
• Brief, thoughtful digression on survival, immortality, and compassion (“I used to try to stop killing bugs, thinking about the human experience…at what point do you start to dictate what life is important and what isn’t?” —Dewayne, 79:48)

7. Playful, Personal & Comic Moments

• Stories of Childhood Hair Trauma: David recalls his mother copying his haircut, only for disaster to strike at Supercuts. (26:03–31:01)
• Accutane & Dermatologists: An extended and funny aside about skin struggles, toxic medication, and the status symbol of a good dermatologist. (12:05–16:40)
• Light-Skinned Men & Acne: Langston posits (jokingly) that acne is a uniquely “light-skinned man’s burden,” leading to a very tongue-in-cheek, mock-medical debate about melanin and skin problems. (14:33–15:40)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Ritual Homophobia:
  • “You have to have homophobia as a counter. If it’s not there…I think they will all turn gay.” —Dewayne Perkins (20:51)
• On Intimacy:
  • “There’s not many environments where a man is touching your face whose dick is kind of, like, rubbing against you…” —Dewayne Perkins (21:10)
• On Class Solidarity:
  • “One guy made a joke about poor people…and the barbershop was like, that’s not funny. This isn’t…shut your ass up that way. Moments later, they were talking about how vaccines aren’t real. And I was like, we’re so close.” —Dewayne (39:56)
• On Self-Awareness and Freshness:
  • “If you was brave, you could handle being a little ugly for a little bit…We kind of mask that in this constant need to have an aesthetic; that’s actually the gayest thing you could do.” —Dewayne (55:22)
• Meta-Joke About Scheming for Barber Appointments:
  • “You’re just trying to get an appointment. You’re trying to go every five days. That’s what this all is…devil work.” —Langston (59:48, 60:06)
• On Standardizing the Barbershop:
  • “We need Starbucks…of barbershops. A Black barbershop. Set price everywhere.” —Langston (52:29)

Timestamps for Key Segments

• Introduction, banter, and health care in Black communities — 02:10–12:03
• Accutane, dermatology, skin color and acne jokes — 12:03–17:00
• Dewayne’s barbershop homophobia conspiracy introduced — 18:10
• Barbershop rituals, intimacy, and masculinity — 20:26–23:48
• Childhood haircut stories — 26:03–31:01
• Can barbershops lead social change? — 35:38–44:43
• Economic and social realities of the barbershop ("time bandits," rising prices) — 47:46–53:03
• Frequency of Black men’s haircuts, power dynamics — 53:28–56:16
• Meta-analysis: Why are we so obsessed with staying “fresh”? — 55:22+
• Listener voicemail: Simulation conspiracy and Matrix discussion — 68:01–78:52
• Closing, “villain energy,” and Dewayne’s alpha manipulations — 82:52–83:44

Conclusion

This episode is a fast-moving, hilarious, and honest analysis of barbershop culture as a microcosm of Black masculinity, stigma, and community. Dewayne Perkins brings both humor and sharp critique, playfully exposing the contradictions of Black male spaces and pushing the hosts toward genuine, sometimes uncomfortable, self-reflection.

The episode’s tone is irreverent, conspiratorial, and intimate—perfect for fans who love their “conspiracy theories” served with a side of real talk and wild laughter.

“If you just try some gay shit and really don’t like it, then you can kind of just sit in that…it’s not that deep.” — Dewayne Perkins (36:18)

“The barbershop is very gay. And so that goes back to being like, this is a, like, typically gay experience we are trying to pretend is something else.” — Dewayne Perkins (55:52)

For more:

• Follow Dewayne Perkins (@dewayneperkins)
• Subscribe/follow "My Momma Told Me" for more Black conspiracy explorations and unfiltered humor