High Top Dreads w/ Will Miles: Motherf*ckin Mini Episode

Summary

My Momma Told Me – "High Top Dreads w/ Will Miles: Motherf*ckin Mini Episode"

Podcast: My Momma Told Me (Big Money Players Network/iHeartPodcasts)
Date: September 11, 2025
Hosts: Langston Kerman, David Gborie
Guest: Will Miles (Comedian)
Mini Episode

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Episode Overview

This mini episode dives into the comic and conspiratorial depths of Black barbershop culture, questionable entrepreneurial schemes, and Black hair politics—specifically, the authenticity (or lack thereof) of high top dreads. Langston, David, and Will riff irreverently on everything from hair experiments to vending machine business scams, mixing humor, nostalgia, and cultural critique.

---

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The High Top Dreads Conspiracy

Starts at 02:34

• Will’s “Conspiracy”: “Niggas with high top dreads… where it just, like, the dread starts up here.” (02:34, Will Miles)
  • The crew jokes about how people with high top dreads want the look without the foundational work, poking fun at its inauthenticity.
  • Langston: “You don’t want to do the core of the work.” (02:47)
  • David: “You don’t believe in these dreads.” (02:53)
  • The style is compared to an updo rather than a respectable crown (“You don’t want a crown, you just want to tie it up off top.” – Host, 03:02).
  • Influenced by pop culture, especially “Black Panther” and Killmonger’s hair:
    • “We all watched Black Panther and like, Killmonger’s hair until it turned into a bit. And then you felt embarrassed.” (03:09, David Gborie)

Memorable Quote:

“It’s like the most ‘I know I’m right ass haircut.’” (04:41, David Gborie)

• Discussion of scrunchies and hair ties as Big Red Flags:
  • Langston: “Anytime that you incorporate a scrunchie or some scrunchie type technology, that’s what you’re on.” (04:44)
  • “It’s too dramatic…now your personality has changed.” (05:22, David Gborie)
  • Personal stories about failed hair experiments and being called out for bad hair choices.

---

2. Hair Experimentation and Regret

03:29 - 06:25

• Will recounts using an app to try on different haircuts, leading to embarrassing photographic evidence and critical feedback from friends (notably Phoebe Robinson at Knitting Factory).
• “No, no, no. That was a bad time in my life.” (05:45, Will Miles)
• Reflection: sometimes the boldest choices come when you first feel a bit successful.

---

3. First Taste of Wealth & Entrepreneurial Schemes

06:24 - 09:25

• Feeling “Rich” for the First Time:
  • The group recalls their first real checks—whether in comedy, teaching, or at the call center—and the delusions of grandeur that followed:
    • “Richest I’ve ever felt is like, those first two checks.” (06:47, Langston)
    • “Teacher’s salary… you got it. This is crazy.” (07:01, David Gborie)
    • “Maybe I have too much money.” (07:12, Langston)
• Vending Machine Hustles:
  • Will shares the dream (and reality) of investing in vending machines—sold as an effortless path to Black financial independence.
    • “They make it sound like you just go to a barbershop and if they don’t have an ATM, you just be like, ‘Let me put in my ATM.' People make it sound … that’s how I get rich: vending machines.” (07:56, Host)
  • The group calls out the myth: It barely pays, the overhead is high, and the inventory is always off.
  • David: “You make 100 bucks every other week.” (08:16)

Notable Quote:

“That's why every vending machine you go to, there’s like a bunch of bullshit that nobody touches…But that's what you could afford to put in that machine." (08:33, David Gborie)

---

4. Vending Machines in Clubs? Snack Technology

09:25 - 14:25

• Will’s idea: vending machines in bars, clubs, barbershops—where people might want snacks while stoned or hanging out.
• David points out the club vending machine dangers:
  • “Somebody try to pop pussy on top of that vending machine, it's going to fall on top of another person. And now you got yourself the biggest lawsuit that ever…” (09:47, David Gborie)
• Snack analysis: Pringles and the conspiracy of “all the same shape” chips.
  • “Chips aren’t supposed to all be the same shape. As far as Pringles technology, something’s up with Pringles technology.” (13:10, Will Miles)
• The crew researches Pringles’ ingredients:
  • David: “No Pringles are not generally considered real potato chips… they are made from a dough of dehydrated potatoes, starches, and other ingredients…” (14:02)
  • This launches jokes about Pringles being the “Soylent Green” or “Spam” of chips, embracing the manufactured, processed nature of American snacks.

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Langston, on hair experimentation:

  “You don’t want to do the core of the work.” (02:47)

• David, on high top dreads:

  “It’s like the most ‘I know I’m right ass haircut.’” (04:41)

• On newfound money:

  “Richest I’ve ever felt is like, those first two checks.” (06:47, Langston)
  “I never pictured myself a portfolio man…but I’ll certainly need one with this much money.” (07:25, David)

• Will, on vending machines:

  “I brought it up all the time.” (07:37)

• On Pringles:

  “Chips aren’t supposed to all be the same shape... something’s up with Pringles technology.” (13:10, Will Miles)
  “No Pringles are not generally considered real potato chips.” (14:02, David - reading AI Overview)

---

Timestamps for Important Segments

• 02:34: Introducing the "high top dreads" conspiracy
• 03:29–06:25: Hair technology, failed experiments, peer judgment
• 06:24–09:25: Early paydays, financial delusion, vending machine scheme
• 09:25–11:00: Vending machines in nightlife, impractical business sagas
• 13:03–14:25: The Pringles conspiracy and “potato chip” deconstruction

---

Overall Tone and Vibe

• Lively, irreverent, and highly joking—riffing on personal stories, cultural moments, and barbershop/Black community skepticism.
• Blends nostalgia, social critique, and playful roasting between close friends.

---

Useful For

• Anyone interested in Black barbershop culture, hair politics, and the myth-making around hustle culture.
• Fans of smart, irreverent comedy and deep-cut references (e.g., “Killmonger hair,” vending machine schemes).

---

This summary skips all advertisements and non-content sections. The content is focused solely on the hosts’ and guest’s discussion, keeping their energy and humor intact.

Transcript

[Host]

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[Guest 1]

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[Unknown/Background Voice]

Motherfucking mini episode. Mini episode. Motherfucking mini episode.

[Guest 1]

My only conspiracy is that I think I texted you a little bit, but niggas with high top dreads.

[Host]

Oh where it's just like it just the dread starts up here.

[Guest 1]

If you got dreads and then they're tied up top.

[Host]

Yeah, I know exactly what you're talking about.

[Guest 1]

Yeah.

[Host]

That is a crazy haircut.

[Guest 1]

It is.

[Host]

Because it's like you don't want the foundation of the dreads.

[Guest 1]

Right.

[Host]

You didn't do the core of the work.

[Guest 1]

Yeah.

[Guest 2]

You don't believe in these dreads.

[Host]

No, no, no, no. And it almost is like you just want to updo.

[Guest 1]

Yes.

[Host]

Right.

[Guest 1]

You don't understand that. That's fine.

[Host]

You don't want to crown. You just want to tie it up off top. Which I've thought about. We've all thought.

[Guest 1]

We've all considered. We all did it once.

[Guest 2]

Hey, look, we all watched Black Panther and, like, Killmonger's hair until it turned into a bit.

[Host]

Right.

[Guest 2]

And then you felt embarrassed and you went, yeah, I don't like that. But no, that's trash.

[Host]

You guys are both more innovative with your haircuts than I. Because I remember you telling me one time. This was you, right. You had some. It was very.

[Guest 1]

I'm scared.

[Host]

You had some sort of technology where you could, like, plug your face in and put different haircuts on.

[Guest 1]

I did have that. Yeah.

[Host]

Yeah. What?

[Guest 2]

Okay.

[Guest 1]

You could put different haircuts on.

[Host]

I've thought about it since we've had that conversation, and I haven't found the technology. I'm screaming now.

[Guest 1]

I spent a day at work looking up different ways I could have my hair. Cause that was. I had long hair for so long in New York, and I got tired of it.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Guest 1]

For some reason.

[Guest 2]

What job were you not working on?

[Guest 1]

Last season of Guthrie. We had some free time.

[Guest 2]

What would I look like with Babes 100.

[Guest 1]

I might have even done the high top dreads back then. And like, yo, what do I look like now? But that technology.

[Guest 2]

Yeah, but the high.

[Guest 1]

Different.

[Guest 2]

I do think the high top dread is an untrustworthy form of. Of hair.

[Host]

I think it's especially. Yeah, I think. Right. I think that's fair.

[Guest 1]

Yeah.

[Host]

And.

[Guest 2]

And you. And this is really. What you said is it's a nigga who. Who knows he's right about some shit he's objectively wrong about.

[Guest 1]

Yes. Oh, yes.

[Guest 2]

It's like the most. I know I'm right Ass haircut.

[Host]

It's. Yeah, yeah. I mean, I think. And this is. And call me crazy, I think as a black man, any time that you incorporate a scrunchie or some scrunchie type technology, that's what you're on.

[Guest 1]

Yeah.

[Host]

Yeah. That's what you're.

[Guest 1]

I don't trust scrunchie niggas.

[Host]

No, no, no, no. Because it's like the act of like, cuz, you ever seen a nigga put it in is. It's too dramatic. Yeah, that's how like the.

[Guest 2]

Yeah.

[Guest 1]

It's like, oh, we're all looking at the hair.

[Guest 2]

We get it now. Your personality has changed. You've become something else.

[Host]

I don't need that energy. Now you're going to put up 4 instead of 6.

[Guest 2]

Keep your hair where it is when you got here.

[Host]

I don't like a shifty. I don't like a hair tie. I don't like a hair tie.

[Guest 2]

I don't like that either.

[Host]

And maybe it's because I have not ever been able to sit successfully pull it off. That might be part of it.

[Guest 1]

I've never got a picture somewhere of me with the hair tie.

[Host]

You did pretty good.

[Guest 1]

No, no, no. That was a bad time in my life. This was when I was looking at the hairstyles online.

[Host]

Okay. Okay.

[Guest 1]

Cause there's a picture at Knitting Factory of me with hair up.

[Host]

Okay.

[Guest 1]

And I remember Phoebe saying something about it. And I remember. Yeah. Just being like, no, I'm correct. This is a good hairstyle.

[Guest 2]

Oh, she. She hated on it a little bit.

[Guest 1]

And rightfully so.

[Guest 2]

Yeah.

[Guest 1]

It was a bad haircut.

[Guest 2]

You made a mistake.

[Guest 1]

I made a mistake.

[Guest 2]

And someone called you out and believe them.

[Host]

Did you have foundational dreads? Did you have.

[Guest 1]

I didn't have any dread.

[Host]

Oh, with that when you had the hair tie.

[Guest 1]

Yeah, yeah, it was. It was trim sides, too. Okay, so it was real bad. Yeah.

[Host]

Damn. That's crazy.

[Guest 1]

Everybody was correct.

[Host]

What were you doing in your personal life? Like, gambling a lot or.

[Guest 1]

Yeah, it was when I first developed the sneaker addiction and all that stuff.

[Host]

Like. No, no, that's a man who's taking crazy. Because, like, you start taking those weird chances when you first get money. That's not a lot of money, but.

[Guest 1]

It is to you, considering how much work you put in and, like, where your life is, it's like, that's the.

[Host]

Richest I've ever felt is like, those first two checks.

[Guest 1]

Yeah.

[Host]

And I've been chasing that high.

[Guest 1]

Yeah, me too.

[Host]

Yeah. It's never felt any bigger than that.

[Guest 2]

And I will say that it doesn't always just have to be entertainment. I remember the first time I got, like, a teacher's salary.

[Guest 1]

Oh, yeah.

[Guest 2]

And I was just by myself at 23, making like 47 a year. And I was like, motherfucker, you got it.

[Guest 1]

Yeah.

[Guest 2]

This is crazy.

[Guest 1]

You're loaded.

[Host]

That's how I felt at the call center. I was like, I maybe have too much money. I remember thinking that, like, what am I going to do with all this money?

[Guest 2]

I was like, man, I guess I got to learn to invest.

[Guest 1]

I know when you start thinking that.

[Guest 2]

I remember even I never pictured myself a portfolio man, but. But I'll certainly need one with this much money.

[Guest 1]

I don't know if you remember season one of Southside when I was considering investing in vending machines.

[Guest 2]

Yeah.

[Guest 1]

I brought it up all the time.

[Host]

Okay, okay. Right. Because that. Is that black. Because I also hate. Somebody told me that, though it wasn't even my idea. Somebody's like, you know what you got to do? Yeah, get you some. And then because it's vending machines and.

[Guest 1]

ATMs, supply and demand, everybody needs it.

[Host]

And they make it sound like it's so easy.

[Guest 1]

I know.

[Host]

You just go to a barbershop, and if they don't have atm, you just be like, hey, let me put in my atmosphere. Like, people make it sound that you're like, that's how I get rich. Is vending machine.

[Guest 1]

Yep.

[Host]

I got.

[Guest 1]

It Was certain. I was like, I got to keep it.

[Host]

I got it. Exactly.

[Guest 2]

I got a feeling. It's not the bag that everybody pretends that.

[Host]

Of course it's not.

[Guest 1]

You make 100 bucks every other week.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Guest 1]

It's like, I think the overhead is crazy.

[Host]

Yeah. Candy's adult. The, like, it's when you get it at Costco and you don't have to.

[Guest 2]

You aren't able to curate that inside well enough to make it sure that everything runs out. You know what I mean?

[Guest 1]

Yeah.

[Guest 2]

That's why every vending machine you go to, there's, like, a bunch of bullshit that nobody touches. Cause it's just, like, nobody wanted that. But that's what you could afford to put in that machine to be able to keep these lights on.

[Guest 1]

Yep.

[Host]

It's also like, the plays you would have to make to undercut the pricing. Like, now I'm going to Mexico to get illegal crunch bars.

[Guest 1]

You know what I'm saying?

[Host]

Like, the shit you would have to do to even figure out how to make it up doesn't make sense.

[Guest 2]

And that's why vending machine candy and fucking chips and stuff always feels defective.

[Guest 1]

Yeah.

[Host]

Sometimes.

[Guest 2]

You know what I mean? Like, the lifesavers are two stuck together.

[Host]

Or their lifesavers is 20, 25.

[Guest 1]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Host]

You know what I'm saying? Like, that's already.

[Guest 1]

This is the only place to get them.

[Host]

You're already hustling backwards.

[Guest 2]

Actually, you're working with old technology yeah, yeah, yeah. You don't have a nerd's rope.

[Host]

Yeah. You might as well have a payphone. It's like.

[Guest 1]

But my thought was to put it in clubs and barbershops. Cause I was like, they don't have. If they had a vending machine. Places where I'm at and I'm stoned and I'm like, I do want some chips, right? Or I do want some candy, but I have to go to the store or there's a vending machine.

[Guest 2]

Here's why the club won't work.

[Guest 1]

Yeah, there's another reason.

[Host]

I don't want to be seen eating Gardenados.

[Guest 1]

Not at all.

[Guest 2]

Somebody try to pop pussy on top of that vending machine, it's going to fall on top of another person. And now you got yourself the biggest lawsuit that ever.

[Guest 1]

That's the problem.

[Guest 2]

I don't know that the club is an option.

[Host]

Before it fell, I was breaking in the dirt.

[Guest 2]

Listen, you were eating Takis, looking at pussy being popped before it falls on top of you. You're in heaven.

[Host]

Yeah, it's one of those moments where you're like, I have everything I ever need.

[Guest 2]

This is. This was Miles. He was on to something.

[Guest 1]

Yeah, he's a gen.

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[Host]

Who said I didn't want Pringles in the club?

[Guest 1]

Pringles. That's a good one.

[Host]

Yeah. Because it's not so messy.

[Guest 1]

Yeah.

[Host]

Yeah. It's not so messy.

[Guest 1]

They're all conformed chips. Which, by the way, something's gotta be wrong with that.

[Host]

Which one?

[Guest 1]

Chips aren't supposed to all be the same shape. As far as Pringles technology, something's up with Pringles technology.

[Host]

Yeah.

[Guest 1]

I think not.

[Host]

Trust me. I think so.

[Guest 2]

Yeah.

[Host]

They came too late in the chip game, too.

[Guest 1]

Yeah.

[Guest 2]

I don't. I don't believe that to be potato.

[Guest 1]

No. There's no way. It doesn't taste like it.

[Guest 2]

No.

[Host]

No. Is it. Pringles isn't a potato chip, Right?

[Guest 2]

I think it is a potato chip.

[Host]

No, that's wheat. That's weak.

[Guest 2]

I don't think that Pringles is a potato chip.

[Host]

That's a pounded oats.

[Guest 1]

It's claimed to be. Yeah.

[Host]

I bet you it's got some corn in there. Corn's in everything. Corn's in everything.

[Guest 2]

Yeah.

[Host]

Wait, did you find out about the Pringles, though?

[Guest 2]

I think they are potato chips.

[Guest 1]

That's bullshit.

[Host]

What are you typing?

[Guest 2]

Are Pringles potato chips?

[Guest 1]

But what requires like, you know how you. Veggie chips.

[Host]

Veggie straws.

[Guest 1]

Veggie straws.

[Host]

Those make me. It makes you feel like you're doing good.

[Guest 1]

It's not. It's just potatoes.

[Guest 2]

Okay. The AI overview says no Pringles are not generally considered real potato chips. By most standards, they are made from a dough of dehydrated potatoes, starches, and other ingredients rather than being sliced from whole potatoes like traditional chips.

[Host]

Wow, brother. So they're Soylent Green. Soylent Green chips.

[Guest 2]

This is Spam turned into chips.

[Guest 1]

Wow.

[Host]

Which also makes sense why it's so delicious. Yeah.

[Guest 1]

At times, the flavor of Spam. Oh, Spam. Yeah, of course. But a few Pringles.

[Guest 2]

That's not true. I've had. I've had it at like Filipino, like Musabi or.

[Host]

No. Okay. Yeah.

[Guest 2]

But I've never had like Spam the regular people way.

[Host]

Damn.

[Guest 1]

It's probably too late throughout the. Yeah, no, you die, probably.

[Host]

Or you develop a taste and then like six months later, Nikki leaves you. You move back to Chicago. Yeah.

[Guest 2]

Turns out his life ended.

[Guest 1]

He just opened one can.

[Guest 2]

Turns out wet meat is bad for you.

[Guest 1]

Wet meat out of a can.

[Host]

I saw him with a shopping cart full of cans. Actually, some old Franklin.

[Guest 2]

This is a full Franklin Saint. Almost there.

[Guest 1]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Guest 2]

Damn.

[Unknown/Background Voice]

Mini Episode. Mini Episode. Mini Episode. Mini Episode. Mini Episode. Mini Episode.

[LG XBoom Advertiser]

Stop settling for weak sound. It's time to level up your game and bring the boom. Hit the town with the ultra durable LG X Boom portable speaker and enjoy vibrant sound wherever you go. Elevate your listening experience to new heights because let's be real, your music deserves it. The future of sound is now with LG XBoom. And for a limited time, save [e-mail] with code Fall25. Bring the Boom XBoom.

[Washable Sofas Advertiser]

Let's be real. Life happens. Kids spill, pets shed and accidents are inevitable. Find a sofa that can keep [e-mail] Starting at just $699, our sofas are fully machine washable inside and out. So you can say goodbye to stains and hello to worry free living. Made with liquid and stain resistant fabrics, they're kid proof, pet friendly and built for everyday life. Plus, changeable fabric covers let you refresh your sofa whenever you want. Neat flexibility. Our modular design lets you rearrange your sofa anytime to fit your space, whether it's a growing family room or or a cozy apartment. Plus, they're earth friendly and trusted by over 200,000 happy customers. It's time to upgrade to a stress free, mess proof sofa. Visit washablesofas.com today and save that's washablesofas.com offers are subject to change and certain restrictions may apply.

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[Host]

This is an iHeart podcast.